


A Better Day

by literalfuckinggarbage



Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: Abduction, Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Coffee Shops & Cafés, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Modern with Magic, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Blood and Violence, Caleb Widogast Deserves Nice Things, Caleb Widogast Needs a Hug, Caleb Widogast is a Mess, Caleb Widogast's Backstory, Emotional Manipulation, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, Fluff and Angst, Found Family, Isolation, M/M, Making Out, Modern Fantasy, POV Caleb Widogast, POV Mollymauk Tealeaf, Slow Burn, Suicidal Ideation, Torture, Trent Ikithon Bashing, Urban Fantasy, alternate universe where I change enough stuff that ep 26 never has to happen, nonconsensual drugging, pov will switch each chapter, will update tags as I go
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-18
Updated: 2021-02-09
Packaged: 2021-03-08 23:15:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 114
Words: 270,160
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27074830
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/literalfuckinggarbage/pseuds/literalfuckinggarbage
Summary: Urban fantasy Nicodranas where most of the MN escaped to, after dealing with whatever trauma they have, and many of them have gotten some well needed help at Pumat Sol's trauma group therapy sessions. Caleb and Nott found Yussa, Jester, Yasha, and Caduceus in Nicodranas and everything is softer (and in firm denial of ep 26, even with recent events in ep 111). Found family is the best family, especially when you think you murdered your birth family.Basically, my otp is Caleb Widogast and therapy, and in this essay I will...
Relationships: Mollymauk Tealeaf/Caleb Widogast
Comments: 1428
Kudos: 472
Collections: M9





	1. One Million Stupid Things

**Author's Note:**

> I'm not really very familiar with posting on ao3, but I'm trying my best (also I haven't written fanfiction in well over four years...)! I have no idea how long this beast of a fic will be since I'm already almost 50 pages in and the end is no where in sight.
> 
> Title is from It's Alright by Mother Mother because Liam putting that on Caleb's playlist fucking murdered me.

### Chapter 1: One Million Stupid Things

Caleb had really been hoping Yussa would say no. He was actually kind of banking on the idea that he would say no. There was no way that this powerful wizard would want to allow Caleb enough free reign over the bookstore Yussa owned that he would allow Caleb’s friends to open a café in the upstairs storage space.

So when Yussa simply told Caleb that he trusted the young protegé, Caleb was at a loss. He was even more at a loss since Jester and Nott were on the edge of their seats, and he had no way of telling their eager faces that he didn’t want this.

Caleb had _really_ been relying on the fact that Yussa would say no. It made no sense for the man to give him as much liberty over the shop as he did.

Caleb supposed he had underestimated the man’s faith in him yet again. He still couldn’t believe that Yussa could be so endlessly understanding and kind, under the layers of aloof mystery. Caleb kept expecting the rug to be pulled out from under him and for the man to end up just like Trent Ikithon.

You’d think being in Nicodranas and avoiding any and all interaction with that old bastard might have calmed Caleb’s nerves enough to the point where he didn’t expect to see him around every street corner. His friends helped, but the panic still settled deep in his core from time to time. The trauma group Caduceus had mentioned to him was nice; they had only talked about handling symptoms so far. He thought, over time, it might help more.

He was lost in thought about the kindness of his mentor when he realized he’d been holding the phone that Yussa had already hung up on to his ear in shocked silence.

“Do whatever you want so long as you keep up with your research and keep the shop in the black. I trust you.”

Caleb wasn’t even sure if he had remembered to say thank you.

He was pretty sure that Jester was vibrating off of her chair. Her grin stretched from ear to ear and he had no words to deny her. “Are… Are you sure about this Jester? It’s a lot of responsibility.”

Jester tackled him into a hug, and Caleb was pretty sure he was going to have a light bruise where he staggered back into the chair behind him. But he couldn’t be mad at her excitement and her forgetfulness of her sheer brute strength. Not when Nott was coming to join in the hug, climbing up onto the chair so that they could all hug properly.

Not when Jester was thanking him in every language she knew, still jittery and bouncing with joy.

Not when his friends were so good at getting to forget the fleeting thoughts about his past.

“Caleb, it’s going to be amazing!” Jester said in her cheerful singsong tone, letting him go only to pick up the small goblin in a bear hug and start spinning in circles. “We’re going to sell the best pastries and tea and coffee and sweets in all of Nicodranas!”

Nott wasn’t happy about the spinning, but she could do nothing against Jester’s infectious grin. She eventually convinced Jester to put her down, going over to Caleb and holding his hand in a reassuring manner. “We’ll do all the bookkeeping for the café, the advertising, the decorations, don’t worry about a thing. The only thing you have to concern yourself with will be all the new customers you’ll have downstairs!”

Raking a hand through his hair that had escaped the simple tie at the back of his head, Caleb sighed deeply. “Ja, ja, I know. I’m sure it will be… very exciting.” He looked around the upstairs storage room, remembering the day Nott had first come up with the idea. Gone would be the days of him slinking up to the apartment turned storage facility to take a nap on the couch instead of a lunch break, or staying the night after a late night of research.

Nott and Jester were already discussing how they would renovate the admittedly small kitchen and get their licenses in order. Despite Nott’s assurance, Caleb was sure he would be dragged to the city hall to help obtain the licenses. Neither of them were used to the official channels of how to do things.

He left them with a large box of books, telling them he would start clearing out his inventory.

“Oh, Caleb, whatever you can’t fit downstairs, we can put in a little shelf with a bench over top along the windows there!” Jester clapped happily at the idea, pointing out the space. “We can sell people books to read while they eat their pastries!”

“I’m sure we won’t be as wonderful salespeople as you, Caleb, but I bet we can sell a few books for you.” Nott was beaming at him, her crooked unworried smile warming the cold dread curling in his stomach.

Caleb nodded, “I’m sure you will be perfect. I think we should talk over some of the logistics of this endeavor, however.” Might as well get that over with so he could get back to Yussa’s research. He doubted that he’d have time to do any extra research for Nott tonight, but she seemed happy enough for now.

“It’s going to be _fine,_ Caleb, I already talked to my mom, and she’s going to give me a loan! All in the family, nothing you have to co-sign, and I even found someone to help us with the more, well businessy stuff.” Jester waved her hand as if that part of running a restaurant was unimportant. “Oh, I should call him and tell him to go ahead with the licenses! Do you think he needs to come over and get more signatures?”

“You just want a chance to flirt with him again.” Nott prodded at Jester’s side with a grin full of crooked teeth.

Now that was a conversation he didn’t want to be a part of. Caleb quietly excused himself with the box he was trying to leave with earlier, attempting to hide the glowing pride on his face that they’d hired another individual to help them with the things he assumed he’d have to do. Maybe he actually would have time to do some extra research for Nott today. Yussa had found a few relevant texts for him to pour over on the subject of transforming the body, and he knew how eager Nott was to go back to being Veth. No amount of Yeza and Luc telling her that they didn’t mind the goblin form could convince her that she could live like this for the rest of her life.

As for Caleb, he would just have to deal with being a disgusting broken creature, because this was all his fault to begin with. He had slowly given up his hopes to bend reality to his will when he realized it was very unlikely that he could get his parents back. Not without an understanding of Dunamancy that he would never have access to. Even Yussa couldn’t help him there. He had to live with what he’d done with the rest of his life, and know he could do nothing to change it. That seemed almost like a fitting punishment, though it would never be enough.

As he heard Nott teasing Jester for her crush on this “Fjord” person, he sent the man a thought of good luck. He was going to need it.

After far too many trips in the elevator to be pleasurable, most of Caleb’s books were back downstairs. It was always his intention to keep the space clear, in case he needed to use it as an apartment to cut down on costs. Luckily the apartment Nott was able to find for him was perfectly serviceable. When she had kicked him out of their small shared apartment to make room for relocating Yeza and Luc, she guaranteed it was an act of love for all four of them. She insisted that Caleb get another roommate to pull him out of his shell. Beau wasn’t exactly great at that, but they lived together in mostly amicable silence. And he was able to convince himself that if he didn’t live a few blocks away he would probably never leave the house. Despite that sounding quite nice some days, it was a crutch he knew he ought not to fall back on.

The trauma group had frowned upon the habit as well. The tall woman, Yasha, had shared a similar symptom and told him that buying a dog had helped. She knew she had to take the dog on walks and go out to buy her food. The sentiment was there, but Caleb was not a fan of dogs. He did trust Yasha’s judgement however. In the two years they’d known each other they’d gotten quite close. She was one of the only people he actually told everything about his past, and he had learned every detail of her own. They both didn’t understand how they’d ended up with such a good lot in life. So she was probably on to something with the dog. Perhaps he would go to the shelter and look for a nice cat. All bookstores have a good cat.

He couldn’t believe the oversight, in retrospect. He supposed part of him was always hoping to have enough money to go buy the scroll for Find Familiar. Trent had stolen or destroyed his old spellbook, and the magic scrolls in Nicodranas were hard to find. Yussa didn’t use a familiar, and Caleb knew it wasn’t really essential to his research to get Frumpkin back so he couldn’t ask. Yussa had given him too much already, offering him Message, Sending, Detect Magic, Comprehend Languages, Tongues, many many more spells than Caleb had ever hoped to ask for. Frumpkin was just another piece of his past to leave behind. Still, the last box felt heavy in his arms for more than the fact that he didn’t know where he was going to put all these extra books. And the fact that his arms felt a bit like wet noodles.

“Wait, wait, Caaaaaaaleb!” Jester called out, far more dramatically than necessary as the elevator doors shut on her outstretched hand.

By the time he was let out downstairs, Jester had bolted down the flight of stairs and was panting by the doors. “What is it, Jester?” he asked.

“You know that door that got wedged shut last year and we didn’t have the money to get it fixed?”

He nodded, thinking of the back room that had once been an empty space for storage. Caleb had been trying to get his hands on a spell to open it as well, but the funds just weren’t there for buying scrolls yet. And he didn’t want to bother Yussa with a wedged door. There was no need to let Yussa know his assistant was incapable of even that small task. But even Yasha couldn’t push the door open without ruining the foundation of the building, so the door remained shut.

It was still very difficult for Caleb to admit he needed help.

He had almost pushed the annoyance to the back of his mind, though it still grated on him whenever he walked by the damned thing. “Ja, of course I do.”

The broad smile Jester had been sporting for the better part of the past three hours had to be hurting her cheeks. It would hurt Caleb’s cheeks, he knew that. Maybe her smiling muscles were stronger than his. Wouldn’t be surprising, to be perfectly honest. “We have a surprise for you!” She drew out the word “surprise” in a way that made him extremely apprehensive.

“Oh? Am I going to like this surprise?” he almost got caught in the elevator doors as they closed. Now he was face to face with Jester, and could no longer avoid the pointed look of the blue tiefling. 

Nott was beside her then, nodding in equal eagerness. “We promise. This won’t be like that surprise party.”

Jester pouted, “Hey, I’ve already apologized like a million times for that. And after the beginning it was a really fun party!”

Caleb mustered a weak smile and tried to push down the memory of panic he felt when all his friends, and a couple of Jester’s friends had jumped out from behind the furniture of his apartment and sent him straight into an anxiety attack. He didn’t tell them how lucky it was that he recognized Nott and Jester and didn’t completely dissociate, since it was clear they had spent hours hanging decorations in his tiny little apartment.

Not to mention he had met Beau in the lobby and she was able to catch him before he fell too far. He hadn’t had to protest the affair; she cursed them all out enough. Caleb had recovered in time to save Jester from being brought to tears, and when it was all said and done, he did actually enjoy meeting Caduceus and Pumat. Even it was a thinly veiled attempt to get him to join Pumat’s trama group.

The whole event was a strong indicator that the group was exactly where he needed to be. 

“Anyways, this is nothing like that, trust me, Caleb!” Jester took the box from his arms, which he admitted were beginning to ache. Maybe he should take Beau up on the offer to go to the gym one of these days.

Nott grabbed his hand and led him to the door. “Try it!”

Very hesitantly, trusting a great deal in his friends, especially since Jester had learned quite a bit about him in the two years since the surprise party, he turned the knob and pushed the door open. It swung open wide, and revealed a completely different room.

“Oh,” the air left him in a huff. The room had been completely transformed. Deep red wood had taken over almost every surface save a very blue, very plush looking carpet covering the plain linoleum that was starting to peel. The plain white walls were now covered with ceiling high bookshelves, each one empty and waiting to be filled. A large matching desk and spinning chair sat in the middle of the room, with a few plush blue chairs for others to sit. They had even cleaned up the dirty window in the back, which spilled afternoon sunlight onto a small blue camelback sofa.

It was beautiful. He wasn’t able to form any words, especially not in Common, and instead felt tears prick at the corners of his eyes.

“Beau said she’d help bring those boxes of books you’ve been keeping in your apartment over here the next few weeks,” Nott said, gesturing to the empty bookshelves while Jester lounged dramatically on the couch in the back. “She said it would replace her morning workout to jog over here with a box for a while. We asked Yussa if it was okay first, and he said it was fine, don’t worry. He even sent us some really fancy paper and ink to put in your desk.”

Jester couldn’t sit still on the sofa, now spinning in his new desk chair. “Momma has a very good relationship with the local used furniture shop owner. And we know you would be sad to lose the upstairs apartment as an office. I know it’s a little small but-” as soon as she stood up to shrug and move to another chair she was caught in a hug.

“Nott, komm her” Caleb mumbled, his voice thick with emotion as he stretched his other arm out to include her in the hug. He hoped the motion and the cognate was enough to illustrate his meaning. Luckily her tackle hugs weren’t enough to knock anyone over. “Das ist… This is so wonderful, meine lieben Freunde.”

Jester giggled, clearly enjoying the extra attention and affection today. “Caleb, don’t cry on my dress, it’s new!”

“I’m not crying,” he mumbled over a small sniffle. “I don’t deserve you two.”

“Shut up and take your surprise, Caleb,” Nott said plainly, no malice in her voice.

Jester nodded, pulling back, “We’re your friends and we love you! We’re allowed to do nice things for you when you do nice things for us, like letting us open a pastry shop above your bookstore!”

Caleb opened his mouth to argue that this was nowhere near the same, but Jester just smothered the words with her own, “Nope, no talking back! You’re already going to be late for your lunch with Yasha!”

A quick look at his watch told him she was right, “Scheiße. I, well, okay. I trust you can look after the store and not get too distracted, ja? And be nice to Calianna when she arrives for her shift?”

Nott and Jester’s matching grins and manic nods were not reassuring at all, but he was already late as it was.

“Byyyyyye, Caleb~!” they sang in unison.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> on tumblr @calebneedsahug (it's just a caleb appreciation blog, not even a D&D blog anymore)


	2. The Fool

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Enter Mollymauk stage left! Enter gentle pining and realizations that maybe just maybe he might have a type...

### Chapter 2: The Fool

Mollymauk was bored out of his mind. Surrounded by gleaming crystals that sent rainbows all over the tiny occult shop, he was as at home as he could be. The Fletching and Moondrop Emporium of Curiosities had been his home for a few years after all. However, his last tarot session was three hours ago, and his shift didn’t end until 8:00p.m. Gustav, his boss, had excused himself over an hour ago to go handle an incoming delivery, so now he didn’t even have someone to talk to.

He flipped his tarot cards over and over at the counter before the cash register, just looking for something to do with his hands. His emblem to the moonweaver was perfectly polished with how often he worried over it. At least here in Nicodranas he could display it proudly, though without having visited a temple in ages, the pendant seemed to be little more than a fidget. He made a mental note to swing by the temple this weekend. Molly had already paced all over the store, and was beginning to regret not bothering to relearn to read. At least reading a book or even a magazine would give him something to do in moments like this.

After waking up in the ground and being unable to speak, reading for pleasure didn’t seem like the most pressing issue. That had been four years ago, and Gustav and Yasha had practically adopted him. He could probably stomach relearning to read, at least to have something to occupy himself in times like this.

Instead he decided to pull a card for himself. He had no intentions set, just wondering what the deck might tell him if he asked.

The Lovers.

“Now you’re just mocking me,” Mollymauk said quietly to himself, shuffling the deck again and thinking with intent this time. What the near future might hold, what was coming his way. Because he wasn’t having any luck in the “lovers” department, and he didn’t need the cards pointing it out.

The Fool.

He sighed deeply, telling himself in vain that his deck wasn’t actually calling him an idiot. New beginnings, free spirit, innocence. Molly could use some of that, for sure.

“Now, if you don’t stop being sassy, I’ll pull out my old deck and put you away for a few months,” he told the cards, packing them up and putting them in their box as if he truly meant it. They knew he was full of shit.

He was always full of shit.

The few customers that wandered in just looked at a few pieces of jewelry before heading back out. None of them were interested in getting a reading, even with his most charming smile. He knew he looked the part of a mysterious fortune teller. Even if he wasn’t a purple skinned tiefling, the colorful robe and gold jewelry would be a good enough indication that his readings were worth it.

Still, no one was biting, and he was starting to think about where one might acquire a library card. Probably at the library. Yasha would probably help him with relearning to read. But his roommate was pretty busy these days. She was always up to something, though Molly was pretty sure she could spend a little less time at the gym.

Speak of the devil, Molly thought, then corrected himself. He was much more of a devil than Yasha would ever be. Even without the horns.

Mollymauk’s entire afternoon brightened when Yasha came walking through the door of the little occult shop during his shift. Avoiding some of the low hanging prisms catching the afternoon sun, she made her way to the counter with a small smile.

“Yasha, darling! What a wonderful surprise.” He grinned at her, waving her over to visit with him and enjoying the soft tinkle of his jewelry as he did. This was exactly what he needed to escape from the boredom that was sitting on the uncomfortable stool on a lazy Folsen. Even though he had only a few other shifts this week, he vastly preferred to have them on the weekends when he could actually get in a few tarot readings. He was lucky to get more than a handful of customers on days like this.

“Hello, Molly.” She leaned over the glass counter in front of him, taking a look at the new jewelry on display and dropping her gym bag to the floor. Last time she was here she almost bought a small bracelet with flowers as beads before eventually putting it back.

He bit his lip over a smile, knowing he’d already bought it for her. It was sitting in a small box in his backpack, waiting for the perfect moment. “Got the day off? How is the florist shop holding up?”

“It’s nice. Reani is working alone today though. She said it’s going to be slow.”

Molly almost groaned, “Tell me about it. I’m dying of boredom over here.”

“You look plenty alive to me.” Yasha’s teasing smirk was evident.

He sent her a look back that he hoped was scathing, though she saw the teasing in it as well. She was good at reading him these days. “We’re all dying slowly. I just feel like I’m dying a little faster today from all this goddamn boredom. Anyways, can I help you find anything today, or are you just here to see little old me?”

Yasha let out one short chuckle, looking back up at him as nothing new caught her eye. “I’m meeting someone for lunch and he’s late. Your shop is right across the street from his.”

Raising a brow and continuing to tease, Molly leaned forward. “Branching out from the ladies then, Yash?”

That one got a snort. Molly beamed in response. “No. I met him at Pumat’s group. He’s very nice. Much more your type than mine.”

“I don’t have a type, dear.” He rolled his eyes.

Yasha laughed again, except this time he wasn’t trying for it. “Yes, you do. You like attractive people with accents.”

“That’s so broad! That’s not a type!” Molly held up a hand over his chest in mock indignation.

She just laughed at him again, clearly in a good mood, despite being held up for lunch. 

“Love, _you_ even fall into that category,” he said with a wink.

Yasha only rolled her eyes back at him, “I’m too big for you. And muscly.”

Molly mused over that a moment. He supposed he did like it when his partners weren’t gym nuts. A little more cushy was perfect for using people as pillows or for the best hugs. And he did prefer when he didn’t have to get stilts to kiss them. Shrugging, he just grinned back at her rather smug expression, “Perhaps.”

“Still, I think you’d like him. Maybe I could introduce you some time. Of course you might know him already. He’s the wizard from across the street, the bookstore.” Yasha looked up then, seeing someone standing outside the store in question and looking around. Molly wasn’t going to let her know that this was another tick in the mystery man’s favor; he loved watching magic practitioners. “Oh, yeah, and he’s a redhead. You like those too, right?” she asked, grabbing her bag off the floor and heading to the door. The man caught sight of her and waved, moving to cross the street. 

Molly thought for a minute and realized he didn’t really know much of anyone on this street. He used to wander around this neighborhood when he was living in the apartment upstairs and first regaining his memories. But these days? He knew the regulars who came in for tarot readings and he knew there was a crummy chain coffee shop two blocks away where he could get sickeningly sweet drinks that they passed off as coffee. A redheaded wizard Yasha thought was his type wasn’t in his mental image of the neighborhood. Of course, we already know why he’d never set foot in the bookstore. You could barely peer in the windows, the books were stacked so high, and they didn’t even seem to sell cute knick knacks and gifts like other bookstores. Just books.

“I don’t discriminate based on something so silly as hair color,” Molly said, still taking a careful look at this friend of Yasha’s. He couldn’t tell if she knew that bit was a lie. He didn’t dislike other hair colors, per se, but the natural red hair of humans and elves that looked a little like the deepest parts of a sunset… It was hard to figure out where his train of thought was going when Yasha gave him a small wave and went outside to meet her indeed, very attractive friend.

The best way Molly could think to describe the look of him was _soft._ A pair of khakis, a thick deep brown turtleneck, a blue scarf, a tattered old coat, despite the relatively warm air of Nicodranas even this late in the season, and a little bit of fuzzy red stubble that was a shade darker than his hair. Soft worked well. Huggable might have been suitable too, especially as the sun caught his hair and lit him up in the beautiful tones of golden hour. The man said a quick apology while Yasha walked out the door, and Molly could definitely hear the accent. Couldn’t place it however. Then the door closed and he could do nothing but watch the pair.

Whatever the man was describing filled him with joy. There was a huge smile on his face, the kind that made your cheeks ache. The grin was adorable, blindingly bright. Yasha looked surprised; maybe he wasn’t always this happy. If the two of them had met at Pumat’s group therapy sessions, that wouldn’t be the most surprising thing. Those folks had quite a lot to be miserable about. Or so he’d heard. He only knew Yasha’s story.

Even hearing the name Obann was enough to send shivers down his spine. He could only imagine what strength it took her to make it through the day and put a smile on her face.

Not this man. Not today. Molly thought he looked like he’d won an award or just gotten proposed to.

That would be a shame. 

Molly wanted to meet him, to see that smile up close. He wanted to be the one who might make him smile like that. Maybe even make him laugh. He couldn’t quite tell what color his eyes were from here either. Perhaps he could get up and rearrange the window display.

Yasha and the mystery ginger turned away from the shop before Molly could make up his mind, making their way towards wherever they planned to have lunch.

Gustav called out from the back then, “We’ve got a delivery, Molly!”

Oh well.

“Need any help?” he asked.

“Please,” Gustav said, stumbling forward with a box that looked way too heavy for either of them. Molly quickly caught the other side and helped him carefully lower it down in the shop. “If you could unpack these and set out what you think would look best in the shop. We just got a huge batch in from a place in Tal’Dorei that mines carnelian.”

Molly nodded, still a little preoccupied with his thoughts of mystery redhead. “Can do.”

It wasn’t until he opened up the box and was met with a two foot tall carnelian geode that he realized the gemstone would be the exact color of the man’s hair. A small part of Molly wondered if the man would like one. But A lot of the folks in Pumat’s group were dealing with self hatred. He knew Yasha talked about that quite a bit.

The thought that the man might hate the color of his hair made Molly’s heart ache. Looking at how the gleaming geode in his hand caught the sunlight and shone around the room, Molly couldn’t think of a better color.

After carefully scanning each piece into the system and setting them around the shop until there was a little sliver of the beautiful red orange color everywhere he looked, Molly sat down on the stool and sighed deeply.

Yasha was always right. This was glaringly obvious now that he was surrounded by the beautiful gemstones. 

He definitely had a type.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thanks for the kudos from the last chapter!


	3. One Billion Foolish Things

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yasha the matchmaker instead of Yasha the orphanmaker... It doesn't quite suit her.

### Chapter 3: One Billion Foolish Things

“Do you date?”

Caleb choked on his coffee. “Excuse me?”

“Do you like, go out and date people?” Yasha reiterated.

“I, um,” Caleb coughed into his napkin, “not really.”

Yasha nodded, letting him collect himself while she took a drink from her own piping hot cup of coffee. The two of them had found a shop that was run by people from Northern Wildmount a few years back, and they did their best to meet up for lunch there at least once a week. Both of them weren’t the best at social interaction, and the small trips to the restaurant staved off a bit of the homesickness they had for places that no longer existed. It wasn’t quite the same as it was in the Zemni Fields, or in Yasha’s tribe, but it was close enough to be comforting. Not to mention it dragged both of them out of their routines.

“Why not?” Yasha asked after it became clear Caleb wouldn’t further the conversation on his own.

Caleb managed not to choke again, but still took his time, very carefully chewing his bite of the sausage entrée he ordered every time they came here. It was very close to his mother’s.

“You will not like my answer,” he said, when he was finished.

She nodded again, frowning. “Is it something we should talk about with Pumat?”

“It doesn’t really matter. I wouldn’t be a good partner right now.” He gestured vaguely to his person as if that explained everything.

“Why not?” Yasha simply asked again.

Caleb took a deep breath, not willing to lie and not excited about Yasha’s reaction to what he was about to say. His friends didn’t understand. She knew everything, but still didn’t understand. “Well, first off, I do not deserve that kind of companionship.”

It was hard to keep his eyes down, since he could feel the glare. His food didn’t taste quite as homey as it did a moment ago.

“You know that’s not true.”

“Regardless, I’m still a mess. A garbage person. I would not be a good person to date.” He stabbed his fork a little more forcefully into the plate.

Yasha was still glowering. “You know that’s not helpful.”

He looked up at her pointedly. “How is ‘hot gym girl’?” 

Every day Yasha went to the gym, and she had begun a sort of competition with another woman. No words were ever exchanged, but the silent glances as they completed the same activities and pushed each other to see who would have to stop first sounded like Yasha’s ideal romance. Caleb noted the day she first told him and realized it had been almost a year. As far as he knew, not even a word had been exchanged between them.

A light pink dusted Yasha’s cheeks. “That is different. I am shy.”

“I am also shy. What brought on this topic, anyway?” He wanted to change it. The fact that she was still talking about it even after the low blow of mentioning “hot gym girl” meant she really had something on her mind.

She shrugged, “You’re not really that shy. And I think my friend would like to date you. It didn’t occur to me until I saw him right before I saw you today.”

A small part of Caleb was touched that Yasha knew everything about him and still thought he was worthy of dating one of her friends. Especially since she seemed to only really be friends with him and her roommate. And Caduceus. A much larger part wanted to jump out the window of the restaurant rather than continue this line of conversation.

“I think that is a bad idea.” Caleb went back to his lunch, trying to ignore the sour feeling in the pit of his stomach. Yasha didn’t continue to press him. For being pretty oblivious, she could occasionally look through all of his barriers and see through to his soul. It was unsettling at the best of times, and it certainly didn’t help his appetite. When she had asked about his crush on Jester years ago, when they had first met, he had almost started hyperventilating.

He was very grateful when she began asking about the study Jester and Nott had built for him instead. Even though he felt he didn’t deserve that kindness either, at least it didn’t involve the affections of a stranger. 

After a few minutes, their conversation and quiet silences were back to normal. Yasha was quite good company, even if Caleb was taken unawares by her insights at moments. At least they were rare moments. Hanging out with Caduceus was terrifying for a man who thought he was hiding himself pretty well. Even after a simple afternoon with him Caleb usually felt emotionally raw, as if he’d had to bare his soul to the man. Yasha was much easier to talk to. 

They struck up a gentle conversation about why she chose the flowers she did to put on his windowsill. He had almost missed them in taking in the splendor of the room, but his memory of the room was perfect. And no one would have put the flowers there but her. Flowers always made her face softer, thinking of her wife, Zuala. Caleb made a mental note to look into visiting Zuala’s grave, though even Yasha didn’t know where it was exactly. Perhaps Jester could be able to scry on the location. He’d look into that. And maybe buy Yasha a bouquet from the farmer’s market this weekend.

Yasha told him the flowers she chose were pretty, matched his eyes (which was what Jester was going for with all the blue furniture), and meant “protection” and “healing.” He tried not to let the tears sting his eyes again as he stared down at his mostly empty plate.

“You all are too good to me.”

“Will I see you at Pumat’s tonight?” Yasha asked, brushing off the comment as they finished up and began to grab their wallets.

Caleb nodded, “I think I should go. I missed last week because I was getting over a cold.”

“It would be good to have you. Last week it was just me, a new person, and Fjord. Sometimes he tries to fill the silences too much.”

He looked up with a frown, “A new person?”

“Another firbolg. She seemed very nice. Nila, I think her name was?”

Caleb looked at the empty plate. “That’s good.” He could hear his accent, a touch thicker at the thought of yet another person knowing any hints about his past. Subconsciously he began to fidget with the bandages on his forearms. Even if they didn’t talk about much beyond trying to care for themselves and dealing with certain symptoms, he just hoped this new person wouldn’t have pity in her eyes.

As kind as Pumat was, sometimes he felt it in his gaze. Not in any malicious way, but it still stung in a strange way he wasn’t used to. The few one on one sessions he’d had with the man were extremely helpful, but ludicrously draining. He didn’t know he had that many tears left to shed over the situation.

Still, since he’d started going, his nightmares were getting better. Every morning he didn’t wake up in a tangled mess of sheets and panic, choking on imaginary wood smoke was a victory. Every day he could go not hearing his parent’s screams in his head for longer than necessary was a blessing.

One he didn’t deserve, but he was working on that.

He wasn’t so blind as to see that he was willing to offer everyone in his life a second chance but himself. Caleb would never judge Yasha for her time brainwashed by a demon. He would never speak against Calianna just because she was raised and gaslighted by a murderous cult. He would never judge Fjord for getting involved with some strange cult to an evil sea god. Of course none of them chose their paths quite like he did.

And it was harder to apply that to himself when he could still hear their screams. He would have given up his sharp memory in a moment if it meant those memories would fade. If it meant he could spend an afternoon sitting in Jester’s apartment with Nott and watch a movie without hearing them every time he so much as saw a candle.

The lengths it had taken him to get even to the point where he could believe it wasn’t a terrible thing to forget, were immense. Pumat had convinced Caleb he needed one on one sessions early on when he caught a glimpse of how deeply the self hatred had engrained itself inside him.

Hating himself felt like a personality trait at this point. Even Yasha didn’t seem quite as bad as he was, even when she did reveal her moments of weakness to him. He still checked up on her some evenings, especially around her marriage anniversary and the day she ran away from home, to make sure she wasn’t back at the fighting pits. The first time he saw her beaten half to death had scared the living hell out of him.

Of course his first fears were that Ikithon had found his dearest friend, and tried to get her to tell him where he was. Learning she’d basically done the damage to herself was shattering.

Caleb made another mental note to see if she would want to do something that evening this year. Maybe see a movie, or just have dinner together in his apartment. Just so that she wouldn’t be alone.

No one knew the anniversary of his misdeeds.

It didn’t feel right to let his friends try and distract him from everything he’d done. Not on that night. Even though it was coming up. He would be able to call in sick, get Calianna on deck to cover for him at the shop, and just avoid all contact. Hopefully if he acted sick enough even Beauregard would stay away from him.

A small voice in the back of his head piped up, a voice that had slowly been growing stronger ever since he’d started visiting the group sessions. It said that you don’t have to go to the fighting pits for it to be self harm. You don’t have to have bruises the next day to show that you hurt yourself.

Despite his better judgement, he pushed the voice down and waved a careful goodbye to Yasha. They had walked back to the bookshop together because she wanted to drop back in on her friend who worked across the street. Caleb watched her disappear back into the strange occult shop before heading back into Yussa’s storefront.

He’d gone inside once to see if they had any spell components. Though they had a few interesting pieces, the place was clearly for the tourists that came to Nicodranas from less magical places. The strange half elf man inside had been unwilling to give much of a discount for him buying in bulk either. Caleb mostly went through Yussa when he needed more components, as much as he hated bothering the man.

Perhaps if Yasha’s friend worked there it would be worth checking out again. It had been almost two years since he’d bothered to stick his head in; they might have even changed their selection. And the half elf might be willing to give him more of a discount now that he’d realized he didn’t need to appear dirty at all times to avoid detection. After he set up his new office, he would poke his head in.

Then he remembered what Yasha had said earlier, and how she had been walking out of that strange shop (Who calls a small storefront an emporium? Seemed kind of pretentious to him.) when he met her earlier. Her friend, who she saw earlier today. Her friend who she thought might want to date Caleb.

Perhaps he would avoid the shop for the rest of his life.

He went home to pack up some of his research and bring it into the wonderful new office. The thought of a cat sounded even more promising as he thought about how nice it would be to bring a cat to the study. Caleb could even buy a scratching post for the little fuzzy friend.

Calianna was sitting behind the register when he got back, and it appeared that Jester and Nott hadn't destroyed anything in his absence. He gave her a small wave, asking politely about her week and offering to show her the new space Jester and Nott had made for him. Sheepishly she admitted she'd been in on the whole thing, knowing they were coming in and out during her shifts. Her addition to the plot was the latest book written by one of his favorite authors from Tal’Dorei. She told him it was in one of the desk drawers. Caleb nodded, thanking her for her part in the ordeal as well before excusing himself so he could become overwhelmed with how lovely his friends were yet again in private.

In the desk he found the paper and ink for transcribing from Yussa, Calianna’s book for him, an eclectic stash of fountain tipped pens, presumably from Nott but not labelled, a blank notebook from Jester with a small drawing of the Traveler on the first page, and a gift card to the office supply store with a note from Yasha explaining she had no idea what he liked, but she’d left him a small vase with the few bachelor’s buttons on the windowsill. Tears began to prick at the corners of his eyes once again. He truly didn’t deserve all the wonderful people around him.

Closing himself up in the little oasis, Caleb started his research.


	4. Divine Delights

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They meet! Molly doesn't know how to talk to someone that he can't be a touchy feely endless flirt with!!

### Chapter 4: Divine Delights

Molly’s boredom was cut most days by watching the bookshop across the street. Though he wouldn’t admit he was watching for the red haired mystery man that Yasha thought he would like, it was still interesting to watch as there was a ridiculous amount of construction happening.

Every day a new truck arrived, bringing in cute little pink armchairs or small wooden tables, or just what seemed like hundreds and hundreds of boxes. He was beginning to wonder if the inside of the shop was a pocket dimension. Then a handmade sign went up on one of the large windows that you still couldn’t even peer through because it was stacked too high with books. Not that he was trying to look in.

>   
>  _Jester and Nott’s_  
>  **DIVINE DELIGHTS**  
>  _Pastries, Coffee, Tea and more,  
>  coming soon!_  
> 

The banner was painted on what might have been white fabric and what might have been an old bed sheet, but the corners were decorated with little well designed sprinkle covered donuts. And Molly couldn’t argue with the rather garish pink.

The closer he looked, the more the upstairs started to look like it might really be a restaurant coming together upstairs. Soon the _“coming soon!”_ was replaced with an _“opening THIS DA’LEYSEN!”_

He looked at his phone, noting that was only a few days away. Molly would have to stop in to check it out after his shift ended that afternoon. Not to mention he was very curious as to if the little blue tiefling he’d seen running around the shop was the one he knew. There weren’t too many blue tieflings in Nicodranas, but it was still hard to tell from far away. Occasionally he thought he’d seen two of them too, but they always seemed to disappear before he could get a good look at them.

By the time Da'leysen rolled around, he was more than ready to admit he wanted an excuse to see if the cute ginger across the street was now working as a barista. The idea of him in an apron serving tea was so adorably domestic Molly thought he could die. As soon as his shift was over he jogged across the street, ignoring the car that had to slam on its breaks and honk at him. He was bright purple and hard to miss; it was probably the driver’s fault.

The little bell on the door tinkled softly, and Molly was reminded of the meditation session he was unable to sit through where the instructor had a small gong. It was like a little warning, “you’re entering a peaceful place, be respectful.”

Labyrinthine was the only way Molly could think to describe it, trying to find a staircase in the winding towers of books. Gustav would have been proud of his use of the word from his “word a day” calendar, but the reason Molly remembered it at all was how it brought up memories of a very handsome elf in tight pants from that old movie. Eventually he made his way through the stacks that absolutely had to be a fire hazard, wondering idly just how many books were jammed in here, and found the counter.

There was mystery redhead, immersed in a book and sitting in a desk chair behind the register. And no sign of an apron. Or even a staircase. Maybe Molly had the wrong door? But the handmade sign was right over the bookstore windows.

He almost didn’t want to disturb him. As he came closer he saw that there was actually a blanket over his shoulders and a mug of something piping hot beside him. A literal picture of comfort. Molly wished he felt half as comfy as this man looked at work. The stool Gustav made him sit on was torture.

Feeling like he was in a library or a museum, Molly cleared his throat softly. Still the man nearly jumped out of his skin. “Sorry, I was just looking for the stairs to the café?”

“Scheiße, ist das Schild wieder heruntergefallen?”

Molly swallowed. Not a word out of the man’s mouth made a single lick of sense, but he’d be damned if it wasn’t one of the sexiest accents he’d ever heard. Zemnian, if he could trust his brain, which might have just short circuited. The one coherent thought he could form was _blue._ Molly needed to stop thinking in one word vibes, but damn if his eyes weren’t a gorgeous, deep electric blue. “Excuse me?” he asked, voice a little weaker than he intended after the long awkward pause between them.

The man looked down at the book, then back up at Molly. “Ah, verzeihen Sie mir-” he shook his head and corrected himself, “forgive me, sir. I was reading in Zemnian; it’s harder to remember to speak Common. I was just saying the sign in the hallway must have fallen down again.”

Molly nodded, trying not to think about how the accent somehow sounded just as good when he was speaking Common. Or how this extremely attractive man just called him “sir” (there were many, many ways he could imagine him saying that in better circumstances, half of the scenarios flying through his brain as he stood there). Or how the man was wearing a small silver pendant on a chain, which was just feminine enough to add yet another layer to the utterly soft appearance.

“So I take it, I’m not supposed to come in this way?” he eventually asked the man.

The auburn locks shook gently as his suspicions were confirmed. “I’ll show you upstairs.”

“Oh, you don’t have to get up!” Molly said quickly, still not yet done commiting to memory how the man looked bundled up in the little blanket with the Zemnian tome.

He stood anyways, folding up the blanket deftly and leaving on the countertop. “I’ve been running upstairs every few hours to make sure they haven’t blown anything up yet. It’s no trouble.”

Molly wanted to argue but the words caught in his throat. As the man stood he saw there were long wrapped bandages around his palms and continuing up into the sleeves of his cardigan. He almost asked if this man, Yasha’s friend, was alright before remembering that probably wasn’t the best idea for someone from her trauma group. As if feeling the eyes on him, the man pulled the sleeves of his oversized sweater down further over his arms.

“Shall we?”

Nodding dumbly, Molly just followed him. Yasha was so annoying when she was right. Being this flustered wasn’t how Molly operated through the world. He was the one to fluster other people. But knowing what this man had probably been through, all of his regular bullshit was gone from his mind.

He just wanted to make him smile.

“You’re Yasha’s friend, right?” he finally asked, breaking the silence as the man carefully wedged the sign that had fallen back into place.

“Ja,” he said, looking up in surprise. “How do you know Yasha?”

Molly grinned. Finally something to talk about that he knew he wouldn’t lose the words for. “She’s my roommate. I saw you two talking the other day, outside the shop where I work. I’m Mollymauk. Mollymauk Tealeaf.”

The man looked a second too long at his outstretched hand and Molly was worried Yasha might have told some insane stories about him. He did have one or two. But then he took it, shaking it twice firmly, far too business like. “Caleb Widogast. It’s nice to meet you. I don’t get to hear much about Yasha’s other friends.” The formal handshake went along with him calling Molly “sir,” but didn’t match up at all with the gentle blush that covered his cheeks. Was that contact enough to bring a flush to his cheeks? Or was he lying about not knowing him?

Molly nodded, ignoring the flush. Maybe he just didn’t like people touching the bandages. “As far as I know, I think it’s mostly you, me and Caduceus. I think the only reason I got to see you was you were meeting up right outside my shop. Usually she’s pretty private.”

Caleb just nodded, but now Molly wasn’t the only one who was staring a bit. What on Earth had Yasha told him? Molly supposed even knowing that he worked at the Lavish Chateau would be a little more risque than Caleb was used to. Even though Molly didn’t work “upstairs,” that might be enough to bring a little flush to a nerdy ginger’s cheeks.

“After you, Mr. Widogast.”

“Ah, Caleb is fine.” He raked a hand through his hair and damn if Molly didn’t want to follow suit. The red locks looked very soft up close.

Molly grinned. “Well, you’d better call me Molly, then. All my friends do.”

“Is that what we are already?” Caleb asked, the light pink creeping back up on his cheeks.

“Any friend of Yasha’s is a friend of mine,” Molly said, resisting the urge to sling an arm over the man’s shoulders as they made their way up stairs. Echoing Caleb from earlier, he gestured towards the stairs, “Shall we?”

Caleb was the one to nod in a bit of a stupor this time, and Molly took the moment to walk up the stairs in front of him. If the man was even barely interested, who was he to deny him a good view? Even if he might have enjoyed the same, he might not have been as coherent afterwards.

“Wow. This is quite different from downstairs.” Molly was overwhelmed with bright blue that only further reminded him of the attractive individual at his side, and bold bubblegum pink. There were little golden trinkets hidden among the blues and pinks as well, but even the linoleum was a light blue and pink checkerboard. The whole room smelled strongly of cinnamon, coffee, and sugar, and it was at least five degrees warmer here than it was in the bookshop downstairs. It was a complete assault on the senses and Mollymauk was in love.

Caleb sighed softly beside him, not entirely out of exasperation but with a twinge of affection for the whole arrangement. “Maybe I can get something blue downstairs,” he said quietly, though he stuck out like a sore thumb in the bright space.

“You could paint the counter blue. And get a blue chair,” Molly offered, still taking everything in. Bustling behind the counter was a goblin running like a madwoman and utilizing a few well placed step ladders to reach the cash register and stove. There were quite a few patrons, most already seated and enjoying whatever confections they’d purchased, but she was still hurrying.

Caleb nodded. “I could indeed,” he said, then walked over to the counter to speak to the goblin, “Are you terribly busy?”

The goblin girl looked up, “Do I look busy?” Behind her a pot of coffee floated on its own to pour into a to go cup, flying to meet her outstretched green hand while the other placed a turnover into a paper bag.

“Kind of, ja.”

Molly busied himself with staring at the menu while carefully taking in every mannerism he could from Caleb. He still looked a tad flushed, but that could have been the temperature increase of the room. The redhead looked pale enough that his cheeks would probably be red for ten minutes at least after coming inside somewhere warm in the winter. It was entirely adorable.

“Well, you’re very intuitive, Caleb. Let me just get this finished, okay? Who’s your friend?” Her voice was shrill, and Molly was only falling for the atmosphere of this strange place more and more each second. Where else in Nicodranas could you get a goblin to serve you a hot chocolate in a hot pink mug?

Caleb’s eyes flashed over to him and he felt impolite not to meet the glance. Tieflings didn’t blush in the same way humans did. Maybe Caleb wouldn’t notice. Maybe this insanely smart man who this goblin just said was extremely intuitive wouldn’t see the blood in his cheeks. “This is Mollymauk. He’s a friend of Yasha’s.”

“Oh, that’s where Jester is! She’s ordering tomorrow’s flowers from her and Reani.” The goblin brightened. If the missing blue tiefling was Jester this was probably…

“This is Nott,” Caleb finished his thought. Can smart people read minds? He thought he heard that wizards could do that sometimes. This man looked like he knew a thing or two about magic. Molly started thinking about various lewd things to see if it would make him blush.

When he started imagining what Caleb might look like without the various layers of brown sweaters, the plan had a reversed effect, especially with the memory of Caleb calling him “sir” fresh in his mind. Molly brushed it off, waving to Nott behind the counter. “Lovely to meet you. This is a spectacular little shop you’ve set up here.”

Her grin of crooked teeth was a rather unsettling expression of joy, but she was clearly ecstatic. Molly could get used to it. 

“Why thank you, friend of Yasha.”

Before he could tell her to just call him Molly, Caleb spoke up, “Well, nothing is destroyed. I suppose I ought to go downstairs. It was nice to meet you, Mollymauk.”

“Molly,” he corrected, reaching to shake his hand again. If it was anyone else he might have gone for a hug. Casual contact was how he kept his touch starved ass out of trouble. But this friendship would be worth it; he could tell.

Caleb smiled a soft smile. Not the blinding one from yesterday, but a little gentle smile that made Molly want to work even harder towards the big grin. “Molly, then. Take good care of him, Nott. Wouldn’t want Yasha to be upset with you.”

The goblin laughed, as if she wasn’t afraid of their intimidating friend. Molly nodded. Props. “Now, what’s the most exciting thing on the menu? You know what, actually? Surprise me.”


	5. Illiteracy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Insecurities! Infatuation! Illiteracy!

### Chapter 5: Illiteracy

Yasha’s friend.

Yasha’s friend who Yasha said she had met earlier that week, who worked across the street.

Yasha’s friend who she said would like Caleb. Like to _date_ him.

Yasha’s friend who prompted an entire conversation on whether or not Caleb would date him or not.

She had neglected to mention he was a stunning tiefling with a few inches on Caleb’s height (if you counted the horns, which it seemed like he should) who dressed like a circus performer. Whose smile could light up an entire room. Who was well spoken and obviously knew how to deal with people with trauma since he was Yasha’s roommate. Who still stared at him like he was undressing him. Well. It was hard to tell what exactly he was looking at with the pupiless eyes. Regardless, the very thought frazzled him to his core, and he was pretty sure his flush was becoming more and more noticeable. To hide it he gathered up the folded blanket from the counter and dropped it back over his shoulders. 

He searched his brain for any other friend of Yasha’s he might have known about, but he really only knew about the roommate. How on Earth was she okay with suggesting he date her roommate? Caleb wasn’t even thinking about that himself, when he knew that Yasha was exactly Beau’s type. Beau was bad at relationships and that was a terrible idea.

Maybe this Mollymauk was very good at relationships.

Caleb slumped back down into his chair, frowning at the cup of coffee that was now lukewarm. He drank it anyway, knowing he needed to stay up to continue his research into Nott’s predicament. Not to mention the few tomes Yussa had sent last week to be translated. He would want them soon, even if he was in the middle of something in Tal’dorei.

He didn’t have time to nurse a small crush, no barely even an infatuation, with the appearance of this pretty purple tiefling. He certainly didn’t deserve the beautiful tiefling’s affections. Caleb already didn’t deserve the kindness of his friends. This was completely foreign.

This uncomfortable coiling in his stomach hadn’t made itself known since Astrid. Even though he was relatively enamored with Jester, that had never been the same. Everyone was a little bit in love with Jester, and he couldn’t blame them. Whoever finally was on the receiving end of her affections would be a lucky individual.

Perhaps he had a thing for tieflings. Caleb shook his head, pulling his book back into his lap and opening it back up to the page he was on without need of a bookmark. That was silly. He saw plenty of tieflings every day. Jester was one of a kind. Mollymauk seemed to be as well. Caleb wasn’t sure if he’d ever seen someone so ostentatiously dressed.

But gods was he pretty. A literal and figurative peacock. The bold tattoos were wonderful, though he in no way deserved the pleasure of getting to know them. He wondered if maybe he should get a tattoo. Trent would never expect him to get a tattoo. It would be quite the shock if the man ever found him. Perhaps he wouldn’t be able to recognize him if he got a similarly flamboyant tattoo. It was a pleasant thought, to imagine the look on Trent’s face if he ever saw that. Then Caleb thought about the pain of someone stabbing something repeatedly into his skin and his scars practically twitched.

He scratched gently at the bandages, knowing that it was all in his head. The wounds were long healed. They no longer itched, not unless he sweat through his bandages. But he could still remember what caused the wounds.

He remembered Jester gushing about a tortle gentleman who told her he could put stone dust in a tattoo for her and give her magic powers. 

He remembered the crystals in his skin, fragmenting and leeching power directly from his blood stream. The pain shooting through his forearms as the very magical essence in his veins was tapped into. The blood seeping into the carpet, blooming in red flowers as the green gems pulsed in his arms.

He remembered Trent’s passive face, collecting data as he held back screams. Trent’s disappointed look when he couldn’t hold back his pained whimpers as he tried not to scream. Trent calling him weak, saying he needed to suffer to reach his full potential.

He remembered overhearing his parents speak of treason. He remembered that this was false, a hazy memory that blurred around the edges and reeked of the worst kind of magic.

He remembered their screams.

He could smell ash and brimstone, feel the flames lick over his arms in the moment he had snapped. He could see his house, burning, the cart pressed up against the front door. Brief flashes of Astrid and Eudowulf trying to subdue him without getting burned. But the screaming. The screaming wouldn’t stop. He couldn’t lift his hands to his ears to block out the sound; he couldn’t move his arms.

He didn’t exactly remember when he started the flashback, but he remembered the small tinkling of the shop bell bringing him back to reality at exactly 5:37 p.m. Caleb should start closing up, but he still wasn’t sure he could move.

The purple tiefling appeared again, footsteps unsure as he made his way through the bookshelves and narrowly tripped on a pile of books. Caleb should move that. Caleb should move at all. All he could manage to do was watch Mollymauk approach him again.

Pumat’s words reverberated as an echo in his head. _Tell yourself you’re having a flashback. It’s not real, and you’re safe._

That was almost helpful. Caleb wasn’t worried about his own safety, not in the slightest. Anything that happened to him still wouldn’t be what he deserved. But he did take a moment to catalogue that he was in Nicodranas, far, far away from Trent Ikithon. Nothing was on fire. Everything was in the past. _Use all your senses to ground yourself in the moment._

Something you can touch. His fingers flew to the pendant resting at his sternum, flipping the cold metal over in his fingers. Trent couldn’t see him, couldn’t hear him. No one could see him, no one but Molly. Caleb closed his eyes a moment and took a deep breath, still turning the pendant over in his fingers. Something you can smell. His nostrils were filled with the scent of coffee from the mug on the counter and the calming aroma of old books. Something you can taste… His mouth still tasted like ash.

Caleb’s eyes flew open to see Molly right in front of him. Very much alive, not on fire, and not afraid of him. The little desk lamp on the counter shed a warm yellow light over his purple skin, lighting it up in an interesting golden color. Once again, Caleb took in the appearance of his tattoos, but Molly spoke before he could spiral. Something he could hear.

“Hey, I just wanted to say thank you. Nott was a delight, like the sign says,” the purple tiefling said, a grin dancing on his lips.

Caleb managed a small hollow chuckle, hoping his eyes weren’t too empty. He was almost back. “Gut, I’m glad.” His voice was steadier than he could have even hoped for. Sight could be grounding too, and Mollymauk had a whole arsenal of things to look at on his person. Caleb’s eyes darted around, taking in the earring cuff decorated with little charms of stars and the moon on a chain down to a stud of the sun on his lobe, a patch of embroidery on the shoulder of his hoodie that was an eyeball, an iron-on patch of a peacock feather over his breast, a sweep of golden eyeliner on each lid.

“Nott asked me to ask if you needed anything. More coffee or something?” he said, looking casually through the small shelf of books he kept up front.

“I am fine,” he said, trying not to visibly wince at the lie. Perhaps it would be helpful to message Nott and ask for a cup of coffee. It would guarantee that he wouldn’t be alone too long. Or even force Caleb to drag himself back upstairs, since she seemed to be manning the fort alone. Or at the very least get the lingering taste of ash out of his mouth.

Molly hummed, a pleasant resonant sound, and ran a digit over the titles of the books on the small display on the counter pensively.

“Are you looking for a book?” he asked, managing to move a little forward in his chair, though he could remember with perfect accuracy which books are there. It was nice to know that he could move, that he wasn’t locked to the confines of the chair. 

Molly kept staring at the small display as a light change in coloration sprang to his cheeks. Caleb began to wonder exactly how tiefling coloration and blood flow worked. That was a safe thing to think about.

It certainly looked like the purple skin was flushed. Thinking about that particular anatomy, and nothing lower, no sir, was a decent enough distraction from what probably would have been an anxiety attack at the very least. He didn’t want to remember (but of course could, in perfect clarity) the last time he had a flashback, when Beau found him curled up in a ball on the floor of his bedroom. He hadn’t remembered exactly when that started either, but it had to have been at least four hours, given their work schedules.

A strange flicker of many different emotions flashed across the tiefling’s face, and what he said next effectively yanked Caleb out of any remnants of the flashback. “I, um, well, I can’t actually read.”


	6. STUPID, STUPID, STUPID

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> whatever happened to the good old days where you could just gently, socially pin someone to a wall?

### Chapter 6: STUPID, STUPID, STUPID

Molly was horrified.

He just told this gorgeous human being that he couldn’t fucking read. This stunningly attractive wizard that worked in a goddamn bookstore now knew that he was functionally illiterate and practically not worth talking to. 

Molly couldn’t exactly pinpoint why his normal suave demeanor had been escaping him ever since he set foot in this establishment, but it was really starting to bother him. Of course, the people he normally flirted with were mostly just people he was messing around with. Anyone other than Yasha’s friend and he might have pinned him to the wall, asking him some inane question just to get in proximity of the man.

But here he was, unable even to form a decent lie.

“You… cannot read? How did you know there was a café? Why are you looking at the books?” A deep furrow had appeared in Caleb’s brow, but he also seemed more engaged than he did a moment before.

Molly just shook his head, not able to make eye contact again just yet. “It’s complicated, but essentially I forgot how to a few years ago. When I relearned, I just didn’t bother learning to read anything longer than a flyer.” He had never told anyone that this soon after meeting them. To be fair, he hadn’t ever actually _told_ anyone that. Yasha only knew because she was there. Same with Gustav and Bosun. He of course left out that he didn’t just forget how to read. He forgot everything but the cold earth of the shallow grave he had to dig himself out of.

A dry swallow later and Molly allowed a quick glance over at Caleb to assess the damage. He didn’t look repulsed or pitying of his ignorance on the subject, he just looked like he was thinking very hard about something. Compared to the thousand yard stare he’d had at the beginning of the conversation, Molly considered this a slight improvement. “I’ve been meaning to grab something sort of… simple to start teaching myself again.”

“Well, I cannot recommend those books then.” Caleb stood up, and it could have been Molly’s imagination but for a moment it looked like the man might fall over. He righted himself so quickly it was negligible and walked over to a section of the bookstore. Caleb hadn’t even bothered to take off the blanket this time, and Molly was glad. He looked like a shiver could knock him over. A pang of worry for the man who looked fragile to begin with wracked through Molly. He wanted to invite him out to dinner just to make sure he got enough to eat. And though he had maybe at least three ulterior motives, that was still less than usual. “There are a few different options to start getting back into reading. I have some young adult books with lower lexile levels, fun quick reads, and then there’s always the poorly written romance novels.”

“I see.” Molly’s eyes darted over the displays, and Caleb seemed to be staring at the flush on his cheeks. He was trying his best to ignore the look, especially when he took a few steps and the eyes stayed in the same place.

He spoke, trying to break Caleb out of whatever he was imagining. Based on the look on his face, it wasn’t anything particularly pleasant. “Well, what would you recommend? I’ll take one of each.”

Molly waited for an answer, and slowly Caleb’s eyes drifted back over to meet his. There was something distant in them, something lost. He almost reached out to him, but held back, trying to be patient. “Entschuldigung-” Caleb started, then spoke in common, “sorry, could you repeat that?”

Swallowing, Molly tried not to dwell on how attractive it was when he slipped into Zemnian. Especially when it seemed like it wasn’t as simple as reading a book in the language this time. Something seemed… off. “I asked for your favorites from each section. I’ll take one of each.”

“Ja, meine Favoriten…” he mumbled to himself, lifting a finger to run over the spines of each section. “This one is very enjoyable. It’s very straightforward, but interesting. It’s about the children of gods, half bloods or demigods they’re called, going on adventures and fighting monsters. Also, it’s banned in the Empire because of all the non-recognized deities, which is fun.”

Caleb handed the book to Molly, a well worn paperback, then moved over to the romance shelf. “And this is _Tusk Love._ Popular, but the language is very simple. It can be very… silly. Melodramatic, I suppose is the right word for it.” This one looked to be a little bit newer, claiming to be an anniversary addition with two new epilogues.

Molly nodded, reaching for his coin purse. “How much do I owe you?”

A frown painted over Caleb’s features. “Why don’t you just borrow it? Unless you’re really looking to start a collection. I don’t want you to buy them and realize you hate reading and be stuck with them.”

“You’re running a business here,” Molly said, shaking his head and grabbing a few silver, “let me pay for them.”

“You’re Yasha’s friend,” Caleb answered, shaking his head in turn. “You are welcome to borrow from my shop. I won’t make someone pay for the pleasure of learning how to read again. If you wanted some help with reading more difficult books I could assist as well.”

He bit his lip, enjoying the light blush that colored Caleb’s cheeks in response. “That’s quite a generous offer. What could I give you in return?”

Caleb was staring at his lips, to Molly’s delight. Though he certainly didn’t think the man would ask him out, he had the option to now. “Could you… Perhaps you could teach me some Infernal? Jester tried to teach me some at one point but she wasn’t really the best instructor.”

“I probably wouldn’t be much better.” Molly was surprised, but the idea of spending more time with Caleb wasn’t a bad thing. “But I could certainly give it a shot. It would help with my written Infernal too, if I taught it to you from scratch. Were you guys using a book?”

The wizard nodded and disappeared in the maze of shelves before bringing back the workbook designed for tiefling children. “We didn’t get very far. I couldn’t bring myself to write directly in the book, but it didn’t sell anyways.”

“When would be a good time for me to repay this favor?” Molly would have to make sure they had the same nights free. He had become a crowd favorite where he performed, so most of his weekends were taken up.

“I’m very busy on the weekends; it’s when most of the people come out to shop. My days off are Whelsen and Conthsen.”

“Perfect! My days off are Grissen and Whelsen. So, I’ll meet you next Whelsen?” Molly grinned.

Caleb nodded, a small smile settling on his lips, once again making Molly want to see the blinding smile from a few weeks prior. “We can meet here. I have an office in the back. How does two o’clock sound?”

“Perfect. It’s a date.” As soon as the words were out of his mouth, he almost wished he hadn’t said them. But the beautiful warm blush that dusted across Caleb’s cheeks was enough to alleviate any of those worries. Molly just gave a cheery wave and took his books with him.

First contact with Caleb had gone extremely well. 

Well he thought it had, until his phone started buzzing incessantly in his pocket, not ten minutes later.

Yasha had called him, asking bluntly, "What did you do to Caleb?"

"Excuse me?" Molly asked, avoiding a jogging half elf on the street. How people exercised outside in the cold weather was beyond him. The strange caramel drink Nott had prepared for him warmed his free hand and he wished he could put away the cold metal phone already.

"Nott is yelling at me over text. Says that you 'broke her boy'." Yasha sounded like she was in the middle of exercising herself. For all Molly knew, she could be. He wouldn’t put it past her to be working on a rowing machine or pullups with the phone on speaker.

"What? Nott liked me! And as for Caleb, we had a nice conversation! He gave me some book recommendations, and offered to let me borrow books from the shop. He even offered to help teach me! I asked what he wanted in return and he said I could teach him Infernal. He initiated everything!"

"You're sure?"

"Honest. We made a date to get started on Whelsen." Molly wished she didn’t sound so apprehensive. This was the first almost entirely genuine conversation he’d had with someone other than her since… Well since he could remember. Even Gustav and Bosun got a fair amount of his bullshit.

She paused. "Did you call it a date?"

"Yeah. Study date. That's a thing, right?" he frowned though she couldn’t see it. If people kept bringing up his failings in grasping the Common language today he was going to feel bad again.

"The reason I haven't mentioned Caleb to you again was he said he wasn't ready to date anyone." Yasha spoke cautiously, picking each word with reverence. That had been quite helpful in the beginning, when he could barely understand all the fast talkers around Gustav. Now it was a reassuring voice. Even when it had bad news.

"Shit. You think he misunderstood me?" Molly bit his lip, a little disappointed. He had been hoping it would be interpreted that way and Caleb would be happy about it. This didn't bode well.

Yasha said, "Clearly."

"Send me his number. I'll text him."

"That is a bad idea."

Molly rolled his eyes though she couldn’t see. "It's that or I'm heading back over there right now. I haven’t walked that far yet."

There was an even longer pause. "Fine. Do not abuse the privilege. He doesn't text much."

Yasha sent over the number promptly and Molly started typing out a response slowly with just one hand. He wanted to think this out carefully, and not spill his drink.

>   
>  **Molly:** hey, Caleb, this is Mollymauk. I got your number from Yasha, sorry if that’s weird  
>  **Molly:** but I heard you were worried that our study date was a romantic thing, and I just wanted to tell you even though I come on strong, that wasn't my intention  
>  **Molly:** I hope I didn't make you uncomfortable  
> 

After staring blankly at the lack of an answer all the way to his subway stop, Molly had to put away the phone to get out his rail pass. Yasha said he doesn’t text all that often, Molly told himself. Caleb certainly didn’t look like someone who was glued to his phone.

Still, he couldn’t wait for the little buzz in his pocket that would mean an answer from his mystery redhead.


	7. Well, my social anxiety is getting the best of me. I'm taking a walk; goodbye.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> empire siblings!! awkward texting!! people giving out Caleb's phone number without thinking!!

### Chapter 7: Well, my social anxiety is getting the best of me. I'm taking a walk; goodbye.

>   
>  **Caleb:** Nott, what the hell did you do?
> 
> **Nott:** i have no idea what ur talking about  
>  **Nott:** (u can respond to this message)
> 
> **Caleb:** That was one time. I haven't called you in response to a text since the first time you got me the verdammt phone.
> 
> **Nott:** just being helpful  
>  **Nott:** anyways, what do you mean?
> 
> **Caleb:** Mollymauk texted me to apologize for the miscommunication earlier.  
>  **Caleb:** What do I do?
> 
> **Nott:** thank him?? idk
> 
> **Caleb:** Don't tell Yasha things without asking me first, please.
> 
> **Nott:** just looking out for my boy  
> 

Caleb stared at Molly’s texts, completely unsure how to respond to the kind message. It was more than he deserved, especially since he had misunderstood the interaction in the first place. Of course the beautiful tiefling didn’t want to date him. And Caleb was pretty sure Molly’s idea of a good time wasn’t learning infernal with a mess of a human in his study. It was just a beneficial arrangement. Caleb would help him learn to read in Common, and Molly in turn would offer his knowledge of spoken Infernal.

>   
>  **Unknown Sender:** hey, Caleb, this is Mollymauk. I got your number from Yasha, sorry if that’s weird  
>  **Unknown Sender:** but I heard you were worried that our study date was a romantic thing, and I just wanted to tell you even though I come on strong, that wasn't my intention  
>  **Unknown Sender:** I hope I didn't make you uncomfortable  
> 

Caleb went into his contacts and added in “Mollymauk Tealeaf.” He considered just writing “Molly,” but somehow that seemed too intimate. Instead of responding right away, he wrote out a quick text to Yasha to ask if she would please ask for permission before giving out his number in the future. Not that he would mind Molly texting him more frequently, but it would have been nice to not be blindsided.

>   
>  **Yasha:** sorry, he said he would come in person otherwise. i’ll ask next time.  
>  **Yasha:** i could have warned you too, but didn’t realize until now. sorry again.
> 
> **Caleb:** No need to apologize, it’s already done. Just please ask me next time.
> 
> **Yasha:** will do.  
> 

He thought of a decent response for well over an hour before realizing that Beau would be home from her shift any minute and catch him staring at his phone. She might not care, but she might ask questions. Caleb had no idea how to explain what happened today.

>   
>  **Caleb:** Hallo, Mollymauk.  
>  **Caleb:** I'm sorry to have worried you, but thank you for the clarification.
> 
> **Mollymauk:** Of course!! Like you said, any friend of Yasha’s is a friend of mine.  
> 

Friend. Mollymauk wanted to be friends. Caleb could do that, he thought. The tiefling probably flirted a bit with everyone, like Jester. No need to fall head over heels just because he sent a few intense looks his way. Tieflings probably didn’t even blush the same as humans. He would have to ask Jester. Or maybe he could find a book on the subject.

The thought of Mollymauk walking in on Caleb reading a book on tiefling anatomy was enough to squash that idea. And Caleb had thought slipping into Zemnian was embarrassing in front of the purple tiefling. 

Of course Beau walked in right as his cheeks had caught a slight blush at some interesting images. “What’s with you?” she asked, throwing down her backpack and lifting a brow.

“Nothing, why?” he asked, feigning nonchalance. Calebs was about as good of a liar as she was at seeing through him, but she was getting used to his tells. At least she was a horrible liar.

She frowned at him, reading his face. “You’re all… pink. Like you’re thinking about fucking or something.”

“It’s cold outside. I just came in.” Caleb spun the lie a little further, though his flush extended to the tips of his ears as she read his face like a book. “You’re the only vulgar one here.”

Beau rolled her eyes, and dropped it, though the look on her face said it was more because she didn’t want to hear about it than because she believed him. Either worked. “Whatever. You want to order takeout? I’m starving and I don’t want cereal or leftovers.”

“Ja, ja, whatever you’d like.” Caleb put his phone away and grabbed out one of the books Yussa had given him to research Nott’s predicament.

She gave him a very pointed look when he nearly jumped out of his skin as his phone buzzed yet again. “You sure you’re okay? You’re jumpy as fuck today,” Beau said, raising a brow.

“Ja, mir geht’s gut,” he mumbled, not bothering to correct himself. Beau had picked up a few choice Zemnian words, and he knew at the very least she knew what “ja” and “gut” meant. And that when he didn’t speak Common, he didn’t really want to speak at all.

She shrugged, going back to the menus piled on their kitchen table. “If you want to talk or some shit, I’m here. You know that.”

Caleb looked at the texts. Nott never texted much, preferring to leave people on read for hours before responding, and Yasha hardly ever texted first. So he already knew what to expect when he opened up the app, though he was still grateful that Beau was busy looking at the takeout menus. He might break down and ask for her advice if she mentioned his blush again, and that was a terrible idea. She was terrible with relationships.

Well, not as bad as Caleb was himself, but a few one night stands didn’t really count to him. As long as she was happy (and no funny business happened in the apartment while he was there), he didn’t really care.

His stomach did a strange flip flop reading the texts, though he knew for sure there was no deeper meaning behind them.

>   
>  **Mollymauk Tealeaf:** Anyways, it was lovely to meet you  
>  **Mollymauk Tealeaf:** See you on Whelsen!  
> 

Beauregard was staring at him as he thought about his answer, or even whether or not this required an answer. He didn’t want to be rude to Yasha’s friend, especially when he had been so kind. And he would be learning Infernal from Molly, so he might as well establish a friendly rapport.

>   
>  **Caleb:** It was nice to meet you too, Mollymauk. I look forward to Whelsen.  
> 

“Marquesian okay?” Beau asked as he hit send, flipping through the menu resting on the table.

Caleb only nodded, opening up the research tome and letting the smell of the ancient paper fill his nose. He ate pretty much whatever was presented. Beau was a good roommate for more than one reason, but one of them was definitely for making sure they were both well fed. She said it was because he slept better at night and didn’t wake her up as much, but he knew she cared.

And he had learned months ago not to scream upon waking from his nightmares. He didn’t need to bother her like he had Nott.

They had the local Marquesian takeout place on speed dial, and Beau was calling in their regular order before he had even finished the chapter of the book. It was a promising notion, though many aspects of Nott’s spell would have to be worked up from scratch. It would take him a lot of time and hard work, but her friendship was worth it. She would be willing to help as well, since it was for her benefit to begin with.

Even so, her confidence in his abilities made it hard for Caleb to admit that he would need assistance with the task. Nott looked at him like he was a god whenever the subject of magic came up. Not like a man who would need help if she wanted this completed in the next five years. It made him uncomfortable to be seen as infallible.

Caleb got a good chunk of notes taken on the transmutation tome, though he didn’t need the scribblings himself as long as he refreshed himself on the material every once in a while. The notes were mostly for when he did ask for Nott’s help in designing the spell. He would have loved to have Yussa’s help, but the man wasn’t even in the country for him to ask the favor.

That was more reassuring than it should have been, but Caleb had been putting it off this long. He wanted to get closer, have more to show before he went to Nott and Yussa. Nott was counting on him, and Yussa would expect only the best from his apprentice. Intimidating to say the least.

Beau eventually went downstairs to meet the delivery person, after Caleb allowed her to rifle through his coins to grab the tip. She didn’t mind the silence over their meal as he continued to work, flicking on the television but keeping the volume off. Closed captioning had improved leaps and bounds once they figured out a modified version of Comprehend Language and Tongues to make enchanted perfect captions in any language you wanted. Whatever spellcaster figured that one out was probably rolling in platinum.

If only what Caleb was trying to do would be so easy. Nott had been so good to him, even at his worst. Thinking back on how they escaped from jail together, traveled through Wildemount, and even the nights when she came in to comfort him after a nightmare, it wasn’t surprising that she thought of him like her son. He still felt bad about that, when she had been dealing with so much on her own. When he was older than her, though he didn’t remember a good eleven years of it. When he very well should have been protecting her.

Caleb didn’t deserve her. She would give him hell for saying so, but he was definitively sure that no one in life deserved someone as fantastic as Nott. Always quick with glowing praise and unconditional love, it was quite literally the relationship between a loving mother and a son. Or perhaps an older brother and little sister. Both even. And he sure as hell didn’t deserve that.

He had burned away any chance he should have had at that kind of love.

And yet here it was again. Nott was his dearest friend, and he would travel to the ends of the earth for her. Or break his back trying to figure out how to undo the curse laid upon her that turned her from a halfling into a goblin. He would do just about anything in an attempt to be worthy of the love that Nott had given him.

The most important things in the world to him these days were his friendships. As he finished up the research for Nott and began casting Comprehend Languages to translate the tome Yussa had sent along, he made a note to ask Yussa for his help on the matter as soon as he came back. It was getting close, and he could call in a favor from the man for a friend. Especially since the first day of the little café being open had been a roaring success. He sold at least twenty more books than normal, and it sounded like Jester and Nott had made a killing. They would definitely be able to afford the meager rent Caleb had calculated.

Yussa would be coming home to a pile of platinum at this rate. Caleb could afford to ask for one favor. For Nott.

Long after Beau went to bed Caleb finished his translation of the first half of Yussa’s text. Over yawns he jotted down a few notes in the blank book Jester had given to him. A reminder to ask Yussa about Nott’s transformation spell. Another reminder to grab some breakfast tomorrow morning so Jester didn’t yell at him and force him to eat too sweet pastries at some godforsaken hour in the morning. And he started a small list of books that Mollymauk might like.

Before going to bed he checked his phone one last time. He’d put it on silent so that he wouldn’t jump near Beau again, but had missed two texts in the interim.

> **Mollymauk Tealeaf:** Just Molly is fine, Caleb.

The other text was just the purple devil face, but Caleb guessed that was just Molly depicting himself. The tiefling emojis didn’t have purple after all. It was fitting for him, Caleb supposed. He certainly could look rather wicked if he wanted to.

As it was pushing late into the night, creeping up on the early hours of the morning, Caleb composed a simple text.

>   
>  **Caleb:** Alright, Molly. Goodnight.
>
>> 


	8. I have a type

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Molly 110% has a type. Too bad they're both complete wrecks.

### Chapter 8: I have a type

Molly had no idea what to expect when it came to his study date that totally wasn’t a date with Caleb. Yasha had unexpectedly left early to head to the florist shop after Reani called her in. Twiggy was out sick with something and needed her to cover.

So now Molly was without an expert opinion on what the hell he should wear to a date that wasn’t a date.

While he didn’t want Caleb to be uncomfortable, he wanted to show that he still cared enough about the meeting to dress up a little. Eventually he gave up and just went for the tightest pair of jeans he owned, a shirt that said “speak of the devil” in infernal, and his signature maroon coat. It wasn’t very warm, but he ran hot and was willing to suffer a bit for fashion. Most of his scarves were silk, but last Winter’s Crest Caduceus had presented him with a ridiculous scarf made of mottled maroon, purple, and deep brown yarn that was about four feet too long and could almost be a blanket.

Molly wrapped the thing over his neck a few times and let it drape down around his frame. It would have to do; he was running late.

The subway wasn’t too crowded on the weekday, so he was able to crack open the second book Caleb had given him without worrying about someone trying to nab his coin purse on the way uptown. He had devoured _Tusk Love_ over the past week at work since he’d been bored out of his mind yet again. It was hard sitting still, but the store had been so empty he just started pacing with the ludicrous novel.

This one seemed to be geared towards a less lewd audience, but it was still simple enough to plow through. It seemed like it would have a decent amount of action, which was promising. Idly he wondered if Yasha had told Caleb anything about him again. These guesses were far too good. Of course Nott had called the wizard intuitive.

There was no way to know for sure but to get to know him better.

Molly arrived a few minutes early, grabbing a muffin and coffee upstairs before wandering back down into the bookstore. He was slightly surprised to find someone else behind the counter, though he realized it made sense. Caleb wouldn’t be studying with him on the clock.

“Hello, can I help you?” the girl asked, sitting with a book just like Caleb had. Deep black hair spilled over one side of her face and she stayed a little bit hunched in the shadows.

Molly swallowed the bite of muffin in his mouth and tried to look around a little. “I’m meeting Caleb here, I think. I might still be early.”

The tinkling of the shop bell behind him sounded promising as the girl behind the desk nodded. “That’s probably him now. What are you two getting up to?”

“I’m going to teach him some Infernal,” he said, leaving out his part of the deal. No need for yet another stranger to know he struggled to read Common. 

She brightened, leaning forward a tad. Molly thought he saw a smattering of scales on her right cheek, but wasn’t going to pry. Not when she was hiding it like that. “Oh, that’s wonderful! He taught me some Sylvan in exchange for me teaching him a little Draconic before he got busy working for Yussa.”

That was news. “Quite the linguist, huh?”

“Caleb is very good with languages,” she said a little reverentially. “I think it might come with being a wizard. I’m lucky to know three.”

“You’ve got one up on me already.” Molly nodded, hearing footsteps behind him.

“Sorry I’m a little late, I overslept.” Caleb’s voice sounded behind him and Molly turned to raise a brow. It was two o’clock, just like they’d planned, and there were dark circles under his eyes. The look didn’t do justice to the bright blues. Sensing both Molly and Calianna’s eyes on him the wizard began to explain, “I stayed up researching, but I think I’m close to a breakthrough.”

“Please don’t overexert yourself, Caleb. Nott wouldn’t want you to do that for her.” Calianna looked worried for him. Molly was glad everyone seemed to feel the same way he did about the strange man.

Caleb just shook his head. “I’ll be fine. Mollymauk, my study is back here.”

“Molly is fine, remember?” he said, following him regardless. He was still in his tattered coat, red tinged ears and flushed cheeks making him look rather adorable. Caleb looked cute all bundled up and sleepy.

“Yes, sorry. Molly,” he corrected himself and ducked into a small room off to the side. It looked like it was designed just for Caleb. Everything was a deep red wood and the chairs, couch, and carpet were all the same blue as his eyes. Molly noticed a small bouquet that had to be from Yasha that matched all the blue as well, though it was darker.

For all the hundreds of books for sale out in the storefront, this room was comparatively bare. “Lots more space in here,” he commented, looking around the empty shelves.

“It’s new. Jester and Nott made it over for me when they took over the apartment upstairs.” There was a hint of that perfect smile from the first day Molly saw him. This must have been what caused it. His friends had specifically tailored a room just for him. Caleb looked in awe still that his friends had done such a wonderful thing.

“It’s fantastic,” Molly noted, not looking at the room anymore, just memorizing the twist upward of Caleb’s lips.

Caleb hummed in agreement and moved into the middle of the room. “We can work at the desk, but we’d have to pass the book back and forth so it wouldn’t be upside down. Or we could sit on the couch, but we’d have to balance everything.”

Molly moved towards the back of the room. The vintage camelback was a little too gaudy for the space, but it still fit. “Couch sounds good.”

He unwound his scarf, careful not to let it catch on any of the piercings on his horns. Once it was set on the arm of the couch beside him, he pulled out the paperbacks from his backpack. “I loved _Tusk Love._ I just started the other one, but that seems good too.”

A pleasant look of surprise crossed Caleb’s face. “You finished it already?” After a nod from Molly he went on, “That’s fantastic. I’ll grab another for you to take with you on the way out. Did you have any questions about vocabulary or anything?”

“Most of it I could figure out from context. I’m pretty familiar with the subject matter,” Molly winked at Caleb, enjoying the light blush that crept back up on the man’s cold cheeks.

“Well, just let me know.” He looked down quickly, pulling open his coat and loosening his scarf as he grabbed the Infernal workbook.

Molly watched him flip through the first few pages. “Do you know the alphabet, or should we start from scratch?”

“Jester taught me, but it had been quite a while. I could probably use a refresher.”

By refresher, Caleb seemed to mean he needed Molly to say each letter out loud once before reciting them all with perfect accuracy. It was honestly terrifying how quickly he sped through the workbook. They were almost half way through the damned thing before Caleb’s stomach growled.

An idea popped into Molly’s head. “Let’s go.”

“What?” Caleb asked, startled as Molly stood. “Where?”

“Practical application. You seem to have a ridiculous memory, so we might as well go try out all those food words you just learned. That and I can hear your stomach from over here. No use arguing with me.” Molly stretched, not used to sitting still for so long and privately enjoying the darting glance Caleb made as a sliver of purple flesh was exposed at his midriff. It had to have been hours since they started. He was starting to get hungry again himself. That muffin wasn’t nearly enough lunch.

Caleb just blinked for a moment before methodically beginning to put on his coat again. He was still wearing bandages. Molly wondered if he was healing from something or covering something, not that it was his place to ask. Mostly he was just happy that he had an excuse to hang out with Caleb without sitting still on a couch. The longest Molly’d ever spent awake on a couch was much more involved, and had cost him a lot more money, but this had overtaken that.

They slipped out of the office and into the hallway.

Molly asked him where he’d like to go in Infernal. It took Caleb a moment, but he eventually answered in Common.

“There’s a place Yasha and I go to sometimes.”

Molly repeated the phrase for him to try in Infernal, breaking it into little chunks. Caleb’s accent was clumsy and he had a bit of a stutter, but he got the point across. There wasn’t a moment Molly spent with him that didn’t seem adorable. Well, he wished Caleb would take better care of himself, but he could work on that. 

_“This is fun,”_ Molly told Caleb in Infernal, grinning over the menu as they went through each item and its equivalent in Infernal.

 _“‘Fun,’ I don’t think I know that word,”_ he said, stumbling over the quick phrase. He was much better at the single words. At least you couldn’t hear his accent then.

“Fun. Enjoyable,” Molly said, switching to Common. “This is fun.”

The dinner went on like that, with Caleb picking up the language faster than Molly could have anticipated. No wonder he hadn’t spent much time learning Draconic with Calianna. He was probably fluent already. Molly didn’t really want to think about that yet. He wanted to enjoy these quiet moments with Caleb, not abandon them as soon as they started.

Every hour he spent with the wizard the more enamored he felt, and the more concerned he got at how he was going to deal with that. They eventually said their goodbyes, though Caleb’s was a tad clumsy. Molly promised to get him some music in Infernal so he could work on his accent. He arrived back at his apartment to find Yasha pressing some new flowers into her book.

The warm and fuzzy feelings he had with Caleb still hadn’t disappeared.

“You look happy,” she said, barely looking up.

“I am happy, Yash. Caleb is really, really sweet.” He flopped down beside her on the couch, leaning on her shoulder lightly, not enough to disturb her work. “I spent hours teaching him Infernal; we even went out to dinner to practice all the food words.”

She looked down at him. “I told you he was your type. And I told you he wasn’t interested in dating anyone.”

Molly sighed deeply. “Yeah, yeah. Did he tell you why?”

“He should tell you that himself.”

“Well, can you at least tell me if it’s a good reason? Do I have any chance?” He ran a finger over the page of the book, noting the blue flowers that he’d seen in Caleb’s office. They were labeled here. Bachelor’s buttons, Cornflowers, or Centaurea cyanus, for protection and healing. That wasn’t the best sign. Everyone seemed to be protective of the wizard, but Molly had hoped he didn’t need much more healing. A vain hope, he supposed.

Yasha closed the book and turned to him. “I do not think it is a good reason, but I know he disagrees. It would be good for him to change his mind, but that might take years.”

Molly pouted. A very vain hope. “Years? Really?” 

“Caleb should be the one to tell you this,” she said, frowning and running a hand over the book. “But he won’t. Not for a while at least.”

She turned to face him and Molly let his head fall onto the couch as he looked up at her. “Caleb has been through a lot,” she started.

“Yeah, I know, you met him in your group with Pumat.”

Yasha shook her head, choosing her next words carefully. “I think… I think he has been through too much. He has been through more than I have. And he blames himself for every second of it.”

Molly swallowed, thinking about the look of terror and fury Yasha got on her face whenever she talked about Obann. How he brainwashed her, used her as a weapon, made her kill hundreds of innocents. What in the fuck was worse than that? And how could he possibly blame himself?

“Do you understand?” she asked softly, resting a hand on his shoulder.

He nodded, unsure if words would come to him. Understand was a strong word, but he could figure the meaning of her words at surface level.

“We try to be quite… cautious with him. He still gets flashbacks. I know he won’t tell you himself, but if you keep going out with him, please don’t take him near fire.”

He nodded again, mumbling, “No fire. Got it.”

Yasha patted his shoulder before she stood, putting her flower book on the shelf. “I know you won’t hurt him, not on purpose. He deserves someone who cares about him like that, but he won’t accept it. Not right now. You might want to look for someone else.”

Molly let himself fall over on the couch, staring up at the ceiling. “Yeah. You’re probably right,” he said, but he couldn’t stop thinking about the light flush in Caleb’s cheeks. This wouldn’t be easy.


	9. Glitter

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Caleb has seen Molly's day job. This is different.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I honestly have no idea if Nicodranas would have a winter (I feel like at the very least it would have a brutal rainy season??), but I’ll be damned if I don’t have blushy Caleb in his original coat. The scruffy boy aesthetic is so good.

### Chapter 9: Glitter

Caleb did not like meeting Jester at the Lavish Chateau. He didn’t really enjoy anything that was particularly “lavish” to begin with, and the burlesque dancers on the stage always made him blush.

It was supposed to be a quiet night, just him and Jester grabbing a quick dinner to catch up. Even though she worked right upstairs from him, they’d both been so busy they hadn’t had a night out in what she claimed was forever. Caleb knew it had only been three weeks, but that was still strange for them. Between research for Nott and Yussa, working at the bookstore, and learning Infernal with Mollymauk, Caleb had barely been finding the time to eat three square meals and sleep enough each day. Jester had said she missed him and insisted on a night out to catch up a little.

A quiet, calm night, where Caleb could relax and take some time to breathe and enjoy the presence of the never judgemental Miss Lavorre, and whatever craziness she inevitably stirred up. Whether that would be dragging Beau along with them, or occasionally Nott, it was usually nothing terribly irritating. A good night was in store, regardless of her plans.

Not a night where Caleb saw Mollymauk Tealeaf in a slinky dress in a deep plum color, crooning on stage as the opener to Marion Lavorre. The giant feather fans appeared to be made of albino peacock feathers, and Caleb had the strong urge to walk over and touch them. He’d always wanted one for his childhood cat, just to enjoy the tactile pleasure of running his hand over the feathers. Maybe when he finally had a free moment and made it to the animal shelter he’d invest.

Caleb had to wonder if the dress actually had any fabric under all the glitter. It left very little to the imagination, and the slit cut up the side went dangerously high, shifting ever so slightly with every flick of his tail. Molly’s face was done up in heavy makeup, thick eyeliner and deep purple lipstick that matched his dress. Caleb was grateful for the dim lighting in the club, and how cold it was outside. He could blame the fire in his cheeks on the weather, though currently he was feeling much too hot in his coat, sweater, and scarf.

For all that Jester was, acting naïve and childish for most of her life, she was not unobservant. She could take one look at Caleb and see every aspect of his soul. And Caleb certainly wasn’t looking forward to that tonight. Though he spoke only internally, he thought to himself, speak of the insightful devil.

Her purple eyes were ablaze and shot between his pink cheeks and Mollymauk’s performance. “Caaaaaaleb!” She grabbed his arm as she stage whispered loud enough for almost everyone in the lounge to hear anyways. “I had no idea!” The squeak wasn’t any quieter, and he swore he could see Molly raise a brow at the scene. It didn’t even detract from the performance. It was almost sexy. It was discreet, professional, and calculated. 

Nothing Caleb felt seemed to be any of those things, especially when Jester was reading his expression like an open book. “Jester, perhaps we can leave now?”

“You don’t want to see the rest of the show?” she asked, suddenly confused. He supposed it was rather conflicting to be this smitten and not want to stare. Still, he shook his head vehemently and attempted to drag her out of the side door. If she had resisted at all, he wouldn’t have been able, but she only seemed intent on badgering him with more questions. “Why not? The way you were looking at Molly; I was sure that…”

“We can talk outside, okay?” She was attracting way too much attention. A bright blue tiefling in a vintage baby pink pinup style dress with enough petticoats to make it flounce with every step was eye catching, even when Molly was commanding the attention of the entire room. Of course Caleb’s vision was still utterly consumed with rich, plum colored glitter.

Jester sighed deeply, but obliged and let Caleb drag her outside. “Caleb, are you going to tell me what’s going on?”

“Nothing is going on. I just was not expecting to see… I didn’t know that…” he could hardly think, much less form a coherent sentence.

She grinned at him, all mischievous and glowing. “Did you not know that Molly worked here?”

“No, I did not.” He could answer questions at least.

Jester kept his hand in hers from when he’d dragged her out and started walking off to hail a cab. “I guess that could be pretty surprising.”

“It was indeed.” Surprising. Breathtaking. Stunning. Practically struck him deaf and dumb.

“But you like him.” She grinned even wider and prodded his side.

Caleb sank further into his scarf. “He is an attractive individual. That is all.”

Jester rolled her eyes and opened the door of the cab for the two of them. She told the cabbie an address he didn’t know. “Where are we going?” he asked.

“Oh, right, I forgot to tell you! Fjord invited me over for dinner!” She was beaming, so he couldn’t find it in him to tell her he was disappointed it wouldn’t just be the two of them. Actually, with someone else as a buffer, he might escape some of the torment of being caught in his crush. A blessing in disguise, and not half as wild as some of her other antics. “I hope you don’t mind. Caduceus will be there too, and I know you like him.”

“Are they friends?”

“They’re roommates! Remember when Caduceus and Yasha stopped rooming together?” she asked, having been friends with the firbolg for much longer than anyone else in the group.

Caleb frowned. “Vaguely. I remember when she got a new roommate.” Then something he hadn’t bothered to think about clicked in his head. “Is this the same Fjord who has been helping with the business aspects of the café?”

“Yes! I can’t believe you haven’t noticed yet.” Jester was halfway to skipping as they left the taxi for the chilly streets of Nicodranas. Caleb missed how wonderfully warm it was here in the summer. It certainly wasn’t as brutal as in the Empire, but he still ran cold. Jester went on with a rather dreamy look on her face, “I’ve been asking him around a lot lately.”

“I know him. He goes to Pumat’s every once in a while,” he said, remembering the half orc man’s stories about the strange cult he’d found himself in after being spared his life on a terrible shipwreck. He never got over how the man was using an accent as a coping mechanism. Caleb would never do that. Not that he could. He was terrible at accents.

Jester nodded eagerly. “Yeah, he said he knew you! He’s very nice. Did you know he went to business school before he tried being a sailor?”

Caleb shook his head no. On another night, he might have asked her about the crush Nott had mentioned, but he didn’t want to turn the attention back on his own crush. That was an unnecessary complication to this evening. “What are we having for dinner?”

“Caduceus said he’s making something for us! He started listing kinds of squash from the Empire and I zoned out, so I don’t know what it is, but his cooking is always delicious so it doesn’t matter.” She shrugged, hitting the doorbell and announcing their arrival to what sounded like a very calm Caduceus.

“Come on up; we’ll leave the door open,” he said, voice crackling over the static.

They were let up into the apartment promptly, with Fjord coming to give Caleb a small tour of the place at Jester’s insistence. Not that the wizard really needed to know the layout of the two bedroom apartment, but he supposed it was in Miss Lavorre’s favor to get caught in doorways with Fjord or brush shoulders in narrow hallways. The place was nice enough, much larger than his place with Beau and full of exposed brick and more potted plants than seemed necessary. It was practically a jungle.

The half orc was only a little awkward around the two of them, wearing a smart button down and some straight jeans. Caleb didn’t really care about that, but he had to acknowledge the outfit as Jester whispered about it in his ear. Fjord was very polite to her, for which Caleb was grateful. He didn’t really want to have to threaten anyone against hurting her. He also wasn’t sure if Fjord knew that he was anything more than a physical weakling. Occasionally he talked about his work with Yussa, but he wasn’t sure if the sheer scale of the things they did was ever expressed. At least part of him was aware that everyone judged him as the most volatile of the group, the most fragile and rough around the edges.

He wasn’t sure if they knew to what extent that he was dangerous.

Even when Yasha went to the fighting pits, she could handle herself. So far as he knew, he was the only one who had spent years in a psych ward either. With Caduceus around it was easier to remember everything he’d been taught. Sitting down for dinner he reminded himself not to compare trauma, and that not all sad looks his way were pitying. Sometimes it was genuine concern. Sometimes.

“So, what has everyone been up to?” Caduceus asked as he moved around the kitchen, putting the finishing touches on whatever it was he was making. His apron was a soft pink that was covered in little teal mushrooms. Caleb was glad to see his hair was piled up in a messy bun on his head. He wasn’t picky when it came to food, but the idea of picking long pink hairs out of his dinner wasn’t pleasant.

That question launched Jester into a full description of everything that had happened with the café over the past week, and Caleb was happy to sit in relative silence and eat the soup Caduceus had made. Some kind of northern squash he’d cultivated from seeds that now wound up a trellis in the apartment window. The firbolg’s eyes lit up as he talked about how excited he was that they were finally ready to harvest.

Caleb wasn’t expecting it to taste so much like home, but he couldn’t be surprised. Caduceus was good at that kind of thing. And surrounded by Jester and Caduceus, and Fjord who he could almost consider a friend, he was comfortable. 

Comfortable enough for his mind to start wandering. The images of the skin tight sequined dress wouldn’t leave his mind, even as he tried pointedly to listen to Jester telling Caduceus the same story she had told Caleb earlier this week over text. It was something about the meanings of all the flowers Yasha was bringing to the café, he was pretty sure. Of course thinking about Yasha brought him right back around to thinking about Molly.

There was no reason whatsoever for Molly to like him. Molly seemed to have just about everything anyone would want in life. Well, at the very least he was gorgeous and had a well paying job. And he was funny, and charming, and very kind whenever he and Caleb were together.

“Don’t you think, Caleb?” Jester asked, pulling him out of his thoughts.

He blinked, looking up and nodding once, “Ja, sure.” Sometimes it was dangerous to agree to whatever Jester was saying, but this seemed innocuous enough. They’d been talking about flowers last he checked.

“Everything alright over there, Caleb? You’re staring pretty intently at your soup,” Caduceus asked, his deep voice resonant and calming.

“Everything is wonderful, Caduceus.” He smiled a genuine smile, only touched by a twinge of sadness. Even if Molly would never be interested in him romantically, he didn’t seem adverse to letting Caleb bask in his radiance from afar. The few lessons on Infernal he’d had with Molly were just lovely. Usually Molly would get bored and insist they go somewhere to practice the language.

They had been to a restaurant to practice food words, a park to practice nature words and types of plants, and had a very silly lesson where Molly insisted they could only learn the numbers by counting M&Ms. Molly was working on convincing him to go to the zoo so they could practice naming various animals. 

The past three weeks really had been wonderful. It was more fun than Caleb had allowed himself to have in ages. Still, the image of Molly in the tight dress wouldn’t leave his mind.

Jester seemed to catch the near wistful tone, “Caaaaaleb, were you thinking about _Molly?”_ Her tone was utterly scandalous.

Caleb wished he had his scarf. He swallowed the bite of soup in his mouth. “That’s ridiculous.” It wasn’t a lie. It was ridiculous for him to think about Molly like that. Even if he was a very enjoyable individual to think about.

Her eyes lit up. “You were! Oh my gosh, I was right! You _like_ him!” She shoved his shoulder playfully, almost knocking him out of his chair.

“Jester, I was wondering if we should hire someone to make special curtains for the big window upstairs in the café,” Fjord said quickly. “The sun shines right in your eyes in the morning, and it might be nice to have half curtains or something, right?”

Caleb shot Fjord a grateful look as he kept her occupied with all the various linens they could get handmade to match the colors of the shop. Caduceus brought out a pasta dish that they ate in almost silence. Silence other than Jester thinking about fabric designs, and the occasional goading question from Fjord. Caleb wasn’t sure how disinterested the man was at this point. He was quite good at pretending to like curtains.

Or perhaps he just enjoyed the excitement of the tiefling individual who was speaking.

“What are your opinions on dyed lace?” Fjord asked, keeping her fully distracted. Eventually she got out her sketchbook and they were gone, Caduceus taking away their plates and Caleb rising to help.

Caduceus let him clean up a bit in silence, offering him some gloves before he started in on the dishes in the sink. After Caleb was getting into a rhythm, Caduceus spoke up. “So is this Yasha’s Molly? Her roommate?”

“He has been teaching me Infernal. I happened to see him tonight and be thinking about him. Jester happens to read into things too often.” He said each word carefully, none of them specifically lies. A lie of omission, sure, but Caleb was well versed in those.

Caduceus nodded slowly, scooping the leftover soup into a few tupperwares. He was far too insightful for his own good, but at least he couldn’t look Caleb in the eye when he was hunched over the sink. “Does he make you happy?”

Caleb swallowed and scrubbed at a spot of pasta glued to the bottom of a pot. “He is a very pleasant person to be around, yes. Why would I spend time with someone who didn’t make me happy?”

“We both know you have.” The firbolg shrugged, now grabbing tupperwares for the pasta. “But I think you’re getting much better at self care.”

Every fiber of Caleb’s being wanted to deny that, deny what small level of peace he’d allowed himself. He didn’t deserve it. He probably never would. But that would lead to a bigger conversation than he was willing to have, so he just nodded. Caduceus finished packing up the food as Caleb was starting to dry the dishes he washed.

“You can just leave those out to dry. It’s not like I’m cooking again tonight.” Caduceus gently took the towel from him and replaced it with two plastic containers. “Jester doesn’t like leftovers, and Fjord says I fill up the fridge too much, so you’ll have to take half of this. I think Beau would like the pasta.”

A small smile came to Caleb’s face at the care of his friend and the thought of having the soup to enjoy for the next few meals. “You’re too good to us, Caduceus.”

The firbolg shook his head, not accepting the compliment. “Nonsense. I saw you enjoyed the soup; I know Beau will like the pasta. It just makes sense to share.”

Caleb accepted the tupperware in the small reusable bag Caduceus handed to him, promising to wash and return them some time soon even after being told multiple times it was no rush. 

It was a pleasant evening, despite the embarrassment, but Caleb was still glad to slip his coat back on and head out into the cold. The taxi ride home was thankfully calm as Caleb had the wherewithal to ask Jester to show him the sketches she’d made of the various curtains.

As they pulled up outside his apartment and Jester thanked him for coming, she caught his arm. “Don’t think I’ve forgotten about Molly,” she reminded him, winking before he could escape.

That was going to come back to bite him.


	10. Protective Friends

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> people being protective of Caleb is my life blood, sorry not sorry

### Chapter 10: Protective Friends

It was turning out to be quite the interesting night. First Caleb walked into the Lavish Chateau and practically ogled him for a few minutes before escaping with Miss Lavorre. Now the blue tiefling was back again. Molly hadn’t ever really talked with the Ruby of the Sea’s daughter much. So when she bounded up to him at the bar, interrupting his conversation with the latest customer who was financing whatever sweet nonsense cocktail he was sipping, he was understandably a bit surprised. Marion tried to keep her away from the actual stage and bar, which she said in a protective way, but of both the daughter and the bar. Now here she was, eyes agleam with mischief.

“You’re Mollymauk Tealeaf.”

“You’re Miss Lavorre.”

“Jester, you can call me Jester,” she quickly corrected, hopping up on the stool that was quickly vacated by the annoyed customer.

He raised a brow as he took a quick sip from his drink and put a hand on the shoulder of the leaving half elf gentleman. “Thanks for the drink, sweetheart,” he turned back to her, “and now, would that be Jester Lavorre of Jester and Nott’s Divine Delights?”

The blue skinned tiefling lit up. “Yes! I’m so glad you know our little shop.” He was a little surprised he hadn’t run into her yet, but she seemed like the kind of morning person who was done with her shift before he even hauled his ass out of bed.

Molly nodded, eating the cherry off the toothpick resting in the glass. Quiet music flowed through the venue, just the strings now that Marion was done performing for the evening. He had switched back into his street clothes, though he usually came dressed up to the Chateau. The pencil skirt and deep purple sweater might not have been as breathtaking as his favorite gowns, but it had kept a steady course of drinks in his hand throughout the evening. “Now, for what do I owe this pleasure?”

“You’ve been hanging out with Caleb a lot recently,” she started, trying and failing to get the bartender’s attention. Molly waved him over so she could order a glass of milk. Definitely a strange one. “And I just want to know what your intentions are.”

Molly could have coughed on the drink. “My intentions? Is this a medieval courting ritual now?”

Jester shot him a look that was much less teasing. “I know you’re Yasha’s friend, but I’m just here to say that if you hurt him, I will personally kill you. As long as I get to you before Nott. If not I’ll have to settle for spitting on your grave.”

Judging by the toned look of her biceps, he thought she just might be able to pull off all her threats. “I wasn’t planning on hurting him, dear. Not like that.”

She frowned at the addendum, drinking her milk.

Molly knew he probably didn’t have to explain kinks to Marion Lavorre’s daughter, but it seemed fun regardless. “Sometimes, when two consenting adults care about each other-”

“Okay, okay, no thank you,” she cut him off, rolling her eyes. “You know what I mean, Molly. He likes you, but he won’t say anything. So that’s up to you.”

Yasha had said as much, but it stung a bit to have it confirmed by another one of Caleb’s close friends. Molly was used to being propositioned, not to rejection. He told himself he could brush it off well, and for the most part he could. But it wouldn’t be the same for someone he actually cared about as it was for attractive strangers at bars. Especially if Caleb only said so because he didn’t think he deserved it, not because he didn’t want to. “So, you think he likes me.”

“I know he likes you,” she said pointedly, wiping off a milk mustache.

“And you know his whole story.”

Jester paused, then nodded. “That’s not my story to tell.”

“No, no,” Molly shook his head, “that’s not what I meant. I was just wondering. If he really likes me, but won’t get closer because of whatever happened, what am I supposed to do?” This was a good chance to get some more information, from someone less biased than Yasha.

She frowned back down into her milk. “That’s a good question. I mean, he definitely deserves a beautiful tiefling who cares for him.” Molly chuckled at the notion. “But he’s still hurting. It might take him a while. Be patient, I guess? But don’t string him along either.”

His cocktail didn’t help the confusion. “That doesn’t really clear anything up for me, Jester.”

Shrugging, she placed down the now empty glass of milk on the counter of the bar. “Caleb can be tricky. He doesn’t even say he cares much, he shows it to you. Like letting me and Nott open the shop upstairs, or picking any new flowers he sees for Yasha. Maybe show him you care the same way until he opens up? I don’t think he’ll want to do much of anything unless he tells you the whole story either,” she mused.

“Like offering to loan me any book I want in his shop?” Molly asked softly. 

Jester nodded quickly. “Exactly.”

Show you care. Molly could do that. He was much more physically affectionate, but he had been building up to simple contact with Caleb. Every time he didn’t flinch when Molly’s fingers brushed over his as they worked through the Infernal book (the third in the series already), was a success. He’d read a bit about the love languages and knew his was almost entirely physical contact. Not even in a sexual way, just lots of hugs and cuddling with friends on top of the intimacy he shared with the occasional stranger.

None in the past few weeks had caught his eye. Even if he and Caleb were nothing but friends at the moment, he was dominating his thoughts. Acts of service, Molly thought that one was called. The one Caleb seemed to like.

Jester interrupted his train of thought. “Anyways, I was thinking of having a movie night! Momma is helping me move into my own apartment and I need to have a housewarming party! Have you seen _Tusk Love?”_ she asked, eyes still bright. At least she seemed to think he wouldn’t hurt Caleb right away. Yasha had warned him about Nott and Beau.

Molly was intrigued to say the least. “Is that based on the book?”

“Yes! Have you read it?” she leaned forward, grinning ear to ear again. When he nodded she practically squealed. “You have to come then! Give me your number and I’ll text you the address and time. I already know you have Whelsens free, so no worries there. You’re free tomorrow right? Yasha and Caleb will both be there, so you’ll fit right in!”

“Yasha’s going?” He lifted a brow, trying to picture the two polar opposites in the same room together. It was an amusing notion.

“She doesn’t know she’s going yet, but yes,” Jester said, not looking up from her phone as Molly recited his number for her. “Along with Fjord, Caduceus, Nott, and Beau.”

“And Caleb is going to a party with all these people willingly?” he asked, incredulous at the idea that the man would ever go to such a crowd of his own volition.

Jester rolled her eyes. “I guess you do know him pretty well already, huh? He’s going to come because you’re coming, silly. And Yasha will finally meet Beau, and Fjord will come because of Caduceus, and everyone will be happy!”

“I mean, I’d go even if it was just Yasha.” Molly shrugged, polishing off the last of his cocktail. “But as for this evening, I should really be going. It was lovely to be formally introduced, Jester.” 

“You too, Molly. I’ll see you soon!” Jester skipped off as he suited up to brace the cold.

The cold night air was even worse than he thought it would be, and Molly was glad Winter’s Crest was just a month away so he could finally go outside in nice outfits without freezing to death. He kind of missed staying in the apartment above The Fletchling and Moondrop Emporium of Curiosities, if only because it was much closer to the Lavish Chateau. But instead he had a bedroom all to himself and didn’t have to hear Bosun snoring. Or, when Desmond was in town, hear the unsavory noises between him and Gustav. The two were practically his dads, and it still felt weird. It was a decent trade off, even if he thought his fingers would fall off when he touched the cold metal door handle of his apartment building.

Yasha was still up when he came home, though from the look of her pajamas, she was about to crash. “How was your shift?” she asked, holding a cup of tea.

“Very odd. Caleb was there for a minute, and then Jester gave me the ‘if you hurt him, I’ll kill you’ talk.” He pulled off his scarf and rubbed his arms. Yasha always kept it too cold in their apartment, and he was chilled to the bone.

She only nodded, looking lost in thought for a moment. “Well, good night.”

He rolled his eyes at the short conversation. “Night, Yash. Sleep well.”

In their small kitchen he grabbed himself a box of cookies and warmed up a mug of Yasha’s nighttime tea in the microwave. Caduceus always made the best blends, and Molly was hoping to sober up a little bit to avoid a hangover. Whatever that half elf had bought him was much stronger than it tasted, and he had drunk it too quickly in an effort to speed up his conversation with Jester.

In bed he rolled around the idea of what he could do to show Caleb he cared about him. Eventually Molly decided on following through with a promise from months ago, though Caleb probably didn’t even need it anymore. Still, he bundled up the CDs from his favorite Infernal band into a bag for Caleb to borrow to practice his accent, and scoured through his room until he finally found what he was searching for.

Holding up the book in victory for no one but himself, Molly slid into bed while leafing through it. It was his possession that wasn’t clothing or jewelry. Gustav had given him the book to help him relearn infernal, though he hadn’t stuck with it once he found he could go find other tieflings in bars and strike up conversations.

The book was some simple fairy tales, nothing spectacular, but they had a predictable structure and the language would be easy for Caleb to follow, even with his limited vocabulary.

The music would be harder. There was no translation for the lyrics in the liner notes for the albums; they were all just written in Infernal. Molly looked at the clock, then grabbed a small notebook and began jotting down the lyrics in common in the notebook. Every once in a while he had to stop and google something, but it wasn’t long before he had his favorite album translated.

By the time he got through the next set of songs his eyes were heavy with fatigue, so he put up the notebook, cleaned off his mascara with a makeup wipe from his nightstand, and curled up for the night.


	11. Sending

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yussa sends Caleb messages from time to time, nbd. That doesn't stop him from expecting a different voice every time.

### Chapter 11: Sending

Molly was early today, and Caleb found him already in the study, grinning sheepishly while holding something behind his back. “I have something for you.”

“Oh?” Caleb asked, always wary of surprises. He supposed if it could fit behind Mollymauk’s back it couldn’t be that terrible, but he was still cautious. Wondering what Molly was hiding caused him to take in the outfit the tiefling was wearing more fully, though he told himself he was much more concerned with whatever was hiding in his hands than how his legs looked in the denim patchwork skirt that stopped just at his knees. His tail flicked back and forth like a cat, ever so slightly nervous.

“Well, this one is just a book. But I told you I’d get some CDs for you a while back, to help your accent, but your accent has gotten so good I forgot about it. Still, I think they might help with some slang.” He held out an old book, two CDs, and a small notebook. “If you don’t have a CD player, I can loan you one, or show you how to look them up online. I guess the important thing is all the liner notes. They have the Infernal, and I’ve got the Common down in here.”

Caleb reached out carefully for the small stack of items, looking at the covers of the albums written in Infernal. The book looked lovely, but he doubted he could understand it all as of yet. He flipped open the notebook. The handwriting was a dead giveaway. “Did you write all these lyrics yourself?”

“The translations you find online kinda suck. It didn’t take that long; I’ve been learning again with you, remember?” Molly shrugged like it was nothing, but Caleb could see the slightly darker circles under the tiefling’s eyes.

He beamed back at Molly. “This is wonderful, thank you.”

Molly looked at him like he was relieved that Caleb liked it, and Caleb almost wanted to hug him. That was far too intimate for them having only known each other a few weeks. Still, Caleb had noticed that Mollymauk seemed to thrive off physical contact with anyone, and the temptation was there.

In a burst of rare confidence, Caleb stepped forward and squeezed Molly’s hand gently. “Really, thank you for taking the time to do this for me.”

Molly looked ecstatic, gently squeezing Caleb’s hand back. “Of course. You’ve been helping me out too, remember?”

Caleb released his hand, though he didn’t want to. It was dangerous to hold the too warm hand in his own for too long. He kept noticing new things in that moment, and if he dwelled too long on how the long fingers intertwined with his, he would be in extremely dangerous territory. “Still. It was very kind of you. Did you have something planned for today?” It was a silly question. Molly always seemed to.

“Well, do you have a CD player?” Molly asked, looking around the room.

After a moment of thought Caleb answered, “I’m pretty sure my roommate has one we could borrow for the afternoon. She used to listen to it when she worked out but now she just goes to the gym. I’ll text her.”

“Sounds like a plan.” Molly nodded, packing back up the workbook so they could take it with them.

Caleb grabbed his phone and texted Beau quickly, flipping through the pages upon pages of loopy written lyrics Molly had made for him. He felt the familiar clench in his chest when his friends did something far too generous for him, but he pushed it down. He’d just have to return the favor in kind. Molly might not know it, but allowing him to see Caleb’s home was a step in that direction.

Beau answered promptly that she couldn’t give less of a fuck and she was at work anyways. Always the polite one.

“Would you want to see my apartment? It’s not much, but it has a couch and a CD player,” Caleb said, gauging Molly’s reaction. Perhaps this was too forward.

“Of course! I’d study with you in the Nine Hells if you wanted. Actually, for immersion purposes, that might be helpful.” Molly grinned. “Shall we?”

With a quick wave to Calianna and grabbing a snack from Jester and Nott upstairs, they headed out on the short walk to Caleb’s apartment. Molly started pointing out various things to him in Infernal and having Caleb repeat them. It was practically a routine at this point, one that Caleb was beginning to really enjoy.

Yussa's voice straight into his mind always startled Caleb. He wasn't sure if the heavy, near fearful breathing ever got picked up on the other end, since before he realized, every single time he was expecting a different voice.

“Caleb, please go to the tower and retrieve the latest research. I have three new tomes for you to translate into Sylvan for me.”

Wizard towers still made him nervous. Yussa's company counteracted this effect most of the time, but on the rare occasion that he had to retrieve something from the tower while it was empty, it put him on edge. Not to mention expecting to hear Ikithon’s voice in his head was always in the back of his mind.

When he stopped in the middle of the sidewalk and dropped the muffin he was holding with a panicked look on his face, Molly got worried. When he spoke to no one, Molly started looking more worried.

“Yes, sir. I'll start this evening.”

“Caleb, is this a magic thing, or do you need help? Please talk to me.” Molly’s voice kept him from drifting too far.

Caleb shook his head, trying to come back to some semblance of reality, “Ja, mir geht’s… I’m fine. Thank you, Mollymauk.”

“What happened? Who were you talking to?” he asked, still staring at him. Caleb tried to focus on Molly’s face, tried to ground himself in this moment. He was staring down at him with concern over his features, concern for him, as he gently tucked a lock of hair behind his ear.

The wizard took a deep breath that shook more than he’d like. “Sorry, Yussa caught me off guard. Usually I don’t get messages out in public.”

He didn’t realize he was scratching at the bandages until Molly grabbed his hand, tentative and gentle enough for him to pull away at any moment. “Can I help?”

“He needs me to pick something up. I should go now.” The crestfallen look on Molly’s face hurt. But it was another grounding moment. “It doesn’t usually take long, but his assistant doesn’t like it if I go too late.”

Molly nodded, still not letting go of his hand. “Maybe I could walk with you? We can listen to the CDs some other time if you want.”

Caleb blinked. “You want to come?”

“I was planning on spending the afternoon with you. And the evening too, if you’re going to Jester’s movie night. I don’t really care where we go. There’s weird stuff everywhere to point to and teach you in Infernal.” Molly gave his hand a gentle squeeze. “And to be perfectly honest, you look like you’ve seen a ghost, and I’d rather not leave you alone.”

Ghosts weren’t actually that bad. Caleb had spells to protect himself from ghosts. But that was a discussion for another day. A deep breath that was still more shaky than Caleb would have liked left his body. “Ja, okay. That would be nice. I’m sorry about the detour.”

“Not your fault.” Molly shrugged. “We still walking in the same direction?”

Caleb nodded, shifting their pathway slightly to the left and forking down a different path. “Do you know the Tidepeak tower?”

“I don’t think so, no.”

“It’s not quite as impressive until you get up close,” Caleb explained, endlessly grateful for Molly’s hand in his own. He felt like if the tiefling let go he might float away. His heart was still pounding in his chest, blood racing in his ears.

Caleb didn’t really find the tower impressive. He found it menacing and hauntingly familiar. He'd always liked towers before everything went to shit. When he made his own, it would be drastically different from the norm, just to separate from the past. But he thought Molly might like to see it, and that kept him on course. Molly launched into telling him what “tower” was in Infernal, and by the time they were close enough to Tidepeak for Molly to let out a low whistle, Caleb almost felt back to normal.

He walked up to the bare wall and knocked gently.

Wensforth opened up a passageway immediately, giving him a once over. “Master Errenis told me to expect you. And who is this?”

“A friend. Do you mind if he accompanies me?” Caleb asked.

The goblin shrugged. “If you trust him, it’s fine with me. The materials are still in the transportation circle. Follow me.”

The familiar sense of underlying horror overtook him as soon as he stepped through the threshold. Though he was looking at Molly to see if the tiefling felt the same and wanted to wait outside, Molly just smiled reassuringly at him and squeezed his hand again. He was reassuring Caleb instead of himself.

He was a saint.

Wensforth led them up the spiral staircase of the sandstone castle that looked like it belonged in a time at least a few centuries before this one. The transportation circle room was familiar to Caleb, though this journey never got much easier.

With his arms full of books, he could no longer hold Molly’s hand. The panic crept in slowly and surely until if Caleb heard so much as a seagull cry he probably would have dropped all the books. He almost did when Molly gently put a hand on his back, trying to be comforting.

Molly took it back quickly, “Sorry.”

“Es tut mir leid,” Caleb said hurriedly, before he realized he wasn’t speaking Common again. “Sorry. I’m okay.” It was more to convince himself than Molly, especially since his voice wasn’t convincing at all. 

Wensforth opened up the doorway for them again and said his farewells. He was used to this by now, and either didn’t really notice or care. He had his own duties to attend to.

“Can I help?” Molly asked again, his voice soft. He was looking at Caleb as though the wizard might shatter at any moment. It wasn’t that far from the truth, though every step they took away from the tower helped immensely.

Caleb bit his lip. “Perhaps we can just keep talking?” he asked. The quiet was uncomfortable in comparison to Molly’s usual need to fill the silence. It was letting his imagination run wild.

“Of course.” And Molly, bless him, launched right back into his Infernal lesson and took advantage of the construction site they were walking by to talk about all the different parts of the street.

By the time Caleb could breathe normally again, they were almost to his apartment.

“Can I ask you something? You don’t have to answer if you don’t want to,” Molly said, stopping in front of the apartment while Caleb fished out his keys with one hand. He nodded and Molly went on. “Has Yussa… done something to hurt you?”

Caleb was so surprised he dropped his keys. “Yussa? Nein, nein. Never Yussa.”

“But someone?” Molly asked, holding out his keys for him and taking the books with his other arm.

He couldn’t meet his eyes, but he nodded. His knuckles turned white around the keys as he tried to keep himself in the moment. All he had to do was unlock the door and let Molly upstairs. He’d already answered the question. He could do this.


	12. Tusk Love

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> a lil bit of beau/yasha because I just can't resist, and some Tusk Love <3

### Chapter 12: Tusk Love

Standing in front of Caleb’s apartment, Molly was still processing what the wizard had told him. Yussa had never hurt him, but that only brought up more questions. As Caleb clumsily handed Molly the stack of old books, his bandages started to slip. Molly had seen him scratching them almost obsessively on the way back, but didn’t know what to say. Now he caught a glimpse of what Caleb was hiding.

Deep puckered scars that looked angry and red, though they must have been quite old, scattered their way all up and down the skin of his forearm under the bandages. Molly’s scars looked nothing like this. His were clean straight cuts, and given how he took to wielding scimitars and what happened when he nicked himself, he knew exactly where they’d come from despite missing two years of his memory. All self inflicted, mostly. A little sting and nothing more. Those twisted gnarled scars up Caleb’s arm looked like agony.

What Caleb had told him echoed in his head. Yussa might never have hurt him, but someone sure did. And Yasha said he blamed himself for it.

Molly felt fury creep up in his chest. It was strange, as he didn’t even know exactly who or what he was mad at, but it was there, burning a hole in his ribs. Watching Caleb clutch his keys with white knuckles as he dwelled on whatever it was in his past that had hurt him so only made the anger worse.

And earlier today Molly had gotten to see that beaming smile from the first day he caught a glimpse of Caleb. He’d been so pleased with his decision to bring over the CDs with their infernal translation, but any hint of that smile was gone now. That only made this worse, the stark contrast between the man who reached forward and clasped his hand in his own, and how he now shook so badly he could barely open the door to his apartment.

But Caleb didn’t seem to want to dwell. He was making light conversation, searching for distractions. He asked about whether or not Molly was going to watch _Tusk Love_ at Jester’s, and if Molly wasn’t planning on it before, he sure as well was now. Like hell was he leaving Caleb alone until he was sure that he was feeling better. Being distracting was something Molly excelled in. Molly launched himself in, full force, and worked on getting Caleb as distracted as physically possible.

The apartment he showed Molly into was small and sparsely decorated. A few accents of blue, and some books were the only bits of personality he could see. “I might have to buy you a tapestry or something,” Molly murmured, looking around with a frown. “Did you just move in or something?”

“I’ve lived here for two years.” Caleb frowned, not seeming to see any issue with that.

“Is there more personality in your bedroom at least?” Molly asked, honestly concerned for the lack of a personal touch. It looked like he was ready to bail at any moment. It could have been a safe house.

Caleb looked around the room. “Actually, my bedroom is more plain. Most of the decor is from my roommate, Beauregard.”

“How on Earth could it be worse?”

He shrugged and nodded, leading Molly down the hallway. Caleb was right. Somehow, it was worse. Many pieces were threadbare, and looked like they’d come from the thrift shop to begin with. Everything was a mismatched monotone of grays and browns. He didn’t even have a second pillow if he wanted to sit up reading in bed. The one crumpled pillow laid on one half of the full bed.

Did Caleb not even take advantage of sleeping in the middle of the bed?

“So… you weren’t wrong. What do you do if you want to sit up in bed?” At Caleb’s bewildered look Molly went on, “Like if you want to read or play on your phone?”

“I read at my desk,” he said, looking over at a desk that was probably the cheapest thing you could get a department store, and Molly thought he was hallucinating, because that had to be a metal folding chair.

Molly went to touch it, as if it couldn’t really be there. This really did look like a safe house. “This is a metal chair.”

“It was free.”

“You couldn’t pay me to sit in this chair.”

“If it’s too comfortable I forget to get up.” Caleb shrugged. “Sometimes I put the pillow down. Or sit on the couch.”

“Well, if you ever want to go shopping for some furniture with personality, I can make recommendations. I know I look like a walking carnival, but I know the basics of interior design too.”

“I don't have the money for that right now. We'll see how the bakery does at bringing in new customers.” Caleb didn't seem bothered by it at all. Molly made a note to keep an eye out for anyone leaving free furniture down on the side of the road.

Molly shook his head, still wanting to make his point. “ _I_ am the most colorful thing in your entire apartment. Even if I was buck naked!” Delight filled Molly’s core at the light blush that crept up on Caleb’s cheeks. He sent the fluster wizard a wink. “It’s not really a question of money; there are plenty of thrift stores or people giving away cool stuff too. But for now, maybe I could just hang out more and act like a decoration.”

Grabbing the CDs, Caleb and his blush disappeared, mumbling about grabbing his roommate's boombox. Molly tried to make himself comfortable on the bed and gave up. The blankets were warm but a little scratchy. They could go sit on the couch. Caleb needed color in his life. A color other than gray or brown. The blue in the living room was a start, but this was still ridiculous. Who didn’t bother to go buy themselves a desk chair?

After a few minutes on the couch, Molly began to get worried. Should he not have left Caleb alone? Was this the normal amount of time to look for a CD player?

He got up from the couch, wandering back down the hallway and finding a small bathroom (devoid of color except for a blue shower curtain), then a room at the end of the hall. “Caleb? You want any help looking for the CD player?”

“Mollymauk?”

That was concerning. “Yes, who else?” he asked, tone teasing to hide the concern in his voice. He poked his head, finding Caleb sitting before a very disorganized closet, looking a bit lost.

“Sorry, I got distracted for a moment,” Caleb said, grabbing the boombox moving to stand up. “I found it, though.”

Molly bit his lip and extended a hand for Caleb to hold like he had earlier, under the guise of helping him up. But once he was up he squeezed gently, and Caleb didn’t pull away. He looked grateful. Molly led him out to the living room, settling themselves close together on the couch so they could both look over the lyrics in Common.

With the music loud enough to bother the neighbors, Molly hummed along to his favorite songs, letting Caleb hear the two different accents in Infernal. This was supposed to be educational, after all. Caleb settled in, slowly coming back to his usual self. Molly couldn’t convince him to try and sing along, but did tease him gently about it to see the light flush on his cheeks.

Molly picked the slowest song on the album and ignored the fact that it was a love song. “You should practice singing along to this one. It’ll help you with the accent, trust me.”

Caleb frowned at the paper in his hands and the liner notes from the album. “Could you say it aloud, slowly? I don’t sing well at the best of times.”

There was something intimate in the quiet as Molly paused the CD and spoke out the lyrics to Caleb, with him staring at his lips and mouthing the words back at him. Molly wondered again if Caleb was picking up on how tiefling skin flushed, or if he was just singularly focused on learning the language.

_“It's only love/Yeah, but only love could fuck me up this much,”_

That was when his roommate walked in, and Molly almost had a heart attack thinking about how he basically looked like he was professing his love to Caleb. It took him a moment to remember she probably didn’t speak Infernal.

The tanned human frowned at the two of them in the doorway for a moment. “Undercommon?”

“Infernal,” Caleb answered plainly, putting down the notebook. “Mollymauk, this is Beauregard Lionett. Beauregard, this is Mollymauk Tealeaf.”

“Beau is fine,” she said with a curt nod in Molly’s direction.

Molly said, “Molly is fine for me. It’s nice to meet you.”

“Yeah, you too. Caleb, you ready to go? Jester just texted me to pick up soda on the way.”

“Is it that time already?” Molly asked, checking his phone. The walk over to Tidepeak tower had taken longer than he thought.

Beau threw a duffle bag down in the corner, and a lightbulb clicked in Molly’s head. “I know you! You’re a bouncer.”

She frowned at him. “What of it?”

“Do you not watch any of the performances? I don’t look that different without my makeup, do I?” he asked, mocking taking offence.

Beau took a step closer, narrowing her eyes. “Oh yeah. It is a little hard to tell without all the glitter and eyeliner. And with me being _outside_ the club.”

Molly shrugged, though his tail flicked. As if he would come to see Caleb without a little eyeliner on. Just because it wasn’t a dramatic wing didn’t mean it wasn’t there. “Small world, I guess. Should we get going?”

“He’s coming too?” Beau asked. She was looking at Caleb and not Molly, not bothering to keep any of the venom from her voice.

An act like that was one Molly could smell a mile away. He already liked her. “Unfortunately for you, dear.” His grin almost hurt his cheeks. Tonight was going to be fun.

She rolled her eyes. “Well, let’s get going then. You’ll probably slow us down in your heels or whatever.”

Molly raised his leg to show off the colorful pastel sneakers he’d spent a fortune on, and a little bit to show off his leg to Caleb. It wouldn’t hurt to show he was flexible. And if Caleb wanted, he could have snuck a look up his skirt. “Lead the way, Beauregard.”

“Just Beau. Just because he does, doesn’t mean you can.” She shot Molly a look, grabbing her backpack that served as a purse and stalking out of the apartment.

“She’s lovely,” Molly grinned, looking at Caleb’s mildly horrified face before the man could try to apologize. “No, really. I like that kind of thing. She _might_ hate me though.”

Caleb stood carefully, avoiding Molly’s still extended leg. “I hope she doesn’t hate you,” he said softly, offering a hand to help Molly stand up. He didn’t keep their hands intertwined this time, moving to put on his coat and scarf. There was more life in his eyes, and Molly was starting to relax again. Beau seemed to know Caleb pretty well too, so hopefully she would be able to help make him feel comfortable at this party.

Molly followed suit by slipping his coat on. It was definitely too cold for his maroon monstrosity, but he'd spent too much time embroidering it to think about buying a warmer one. He enjoyed the walk over to Jester’s new apartment by lightly antagonizing Beau and occasionally pointing to something new for Caleb to learn in Infernal. Beau looked like she might kill him, and he was having a wonderful time.

Jester let them up into the far too fancy apartment building and they knocked on the door as Molly was finishing up talking, “The long and short of it is, when in doubt, if something goes wrong, just... nudity. It usually works-”

Yasha was the one to open the door, and all the color in her admittedly pale face drained away, leaving her looking like a black and white photograph. She was staring directly at Beau, and Caleb looked just as confused as Molly felt. Beau was staring back in a similar manner, jaw dropping near to the floor.

Yasha said something softly under her breath that perked Caleb up. Molly turned to him as he asked, “Beauregard is your ‘hot gym girl’?”

Beau spluttered, “But, wait, no you’re the hot one-” Her head whipped around to face Caleb, “You know her?”

“This is Yasha. I was sure you two had met at some point.” Caleb was frowning deeply. “Actually, I guess not, now that I think about it. I would have remembered something like this.”

Beau let out what Molly could only describe as a pained squeak.

Both women were looking at Caleb like he had betrayed them in some way. Molly guessed Beau was the strange woman Yasha had been trying and failing to flirt with at the gym, but Caleb didn’t seem like he could handle his own love life, much less mitigate his best friend and roommate’s. Molly hooked arms with Caleb, emboldened with Yasha’s presence. “If you’ll excuse us, ladies. We’ll give you a moment to talk,” he said easily, slipping past Yasha with Caleb on his arm and taking in Jester’s new place.

“Now this has enough color,” Molly said with a low whistle, releasing Caleb as the wizard was bombarded with a hug from Jester that nearly knocked him over.

“Hallo, Jester,” Caleb half coughed, patting her once or twice awkwardly on the back. “Thank you for having us all over.”

She grinned and kissed him on the cheek, causing a light flush in his cheeks. As cute as it was, Molly was starting to wonder if the man just blushed easily. Jester was still beaming, releasing Caleb until just an arm was slung around his waist to lead him further inside. “Of course! Nott’s in the kitchen with the pizza; you better grab some before she eats it all. Fjord and Caduceus are on their way but they texted and said the subways are slowed down. Someone messed with the protective wards and walked on the tracks again.”

Molly walked around the apartment a bit first, letting Caleb and Jester talk and taking in the bright blues, purples, pinks, and greens that surrounded them. It was like the café, but more eclectic, with different furniture that looked like it had been curated for a modern art exhibit. The whole place smelled faintly of cinnamon and sugar, and there were framed photographs of Jester and all her friends on every possible surface. Most of them Caleb looked very reluctant to be photographed, but there was one caught when he must not have been looking, mid laugh. His smile was open and welcoming, and Molly could see the hint of some freckles on his cheeks. Molly just gulped and moved onto the kitchen. No time for that now. 

In the kitchen Nott was standing on a chair and eating a piece of pizza that appeared to have pineapple and ham on it. “Mollymauk, right?”

“Molly’s fine, Nott,” he said, grabbing a plate. “That’s what you’ve been writing on my coffee cups.”

“You’re the one that likes Caleb?” she asked, raising a brow but still talking over her massive mouthful of pizza. Of course she and Jester had talked. They ran the café together after all.

Molly pulled a piece of pepperoni onto one plate and grabbed another. “Maybe. What kind of pizza does he like?”

“Cheese usually. But he only really hates the pineapple.” She swallowed finally, taking a swig from a shining silver flask and giving him a look over. “I wouldn’t have pegged you for his type.”

“I’m not sure I want _you_ pegging me at all,” Molly said, smirking and grabbing a slice of the cheese for Caleb. These might be Caleb’s friends, but they were all far too easy to rile up.

Nott looked scandalized, hissing back at him, “My point exactly. If you’re just using him for… for your own pleasures, I’m going to cut your throat in your sleep.” Molly would have taken her seriously even without the pocket knife she pulled out of nowhere, but he took a half step back. 

“Jester told me as much. Do you really think that little of me? I’ve been buying coffee from you for weeks.”

“People’s coffee preferences say nothing about their… their levels of deviance!” her shrill voice got a little loud and Molly shot her a look. “And even your coffee preferences are far too adventurous to begin with.”

Molly stepped forward with more of a hushed tone. “Look, I’m not a terrible person. I never do anything without consent, and Caleb and I are just friends. The most we’ve done is hold hands, okay?”

Nott was still glaring at him, but nodded and put away the knife. That might be the best he got tonight, so he grabbed a few napkins, two bottles of beer, and walked out of the kitchen with a wink for the goblin over his shoulder. She’d warm up to him eventually. Hopefully. A rumbling of deeper voices in the other room indicated the rest of the party had arrived.

Caleb was talking with Caduceus who had just stepped in the door with Fjord. Jester had taken Caleb’s coat and scarf, leaving him looking soft but comfortable standing next to the massive firbolg.

Caduceus grinned when he saw Molly, so he joined their conversation, passing Caleb the pizza and bottle of beer. “Did I guess right?”

“Ja, danke.” Caleb shuffled a moment to grab a pocket knife from his component pouch to pry off the bottle cap. The way it matched Nott's made Molly wonder if it'd been another gift for the wizard. He took the cap off with one hand, more skillfully than Molly was expecting. That and the deeply accented Zemnian caught Molly off guard. He’d been so worried about Caleb today he forgot how sexy the wizard could be without even trying, especially when he relaxed a bit.

Not to be shown up, Molly hit his bottle on the edge of a side table so the cap went flying, catching it with his free hand. Of course he had to put the pizza down, but it was still well executed if he did say so himself. Jester clapped then warned him not to hurt her tables.

“So Caleb tells me you two have been spending a lot of time together,” Caduceus said, an easy grin on his face. “That sounds nice.”

Caleb took a swig of beer, and Molly wondered if he was dodging answering the unasked question. “It has been nice,” Molly said, but he wouldn’t press Caleb if that wasn’t something he wanted to talk about. “Should we stake a claim on seats in the living room?”

Caduceus followed them into the room, Jester explaining the backstory behind each piece of furniture, though it sounded like most of them were just that the retailers wanted to fuck her mother. Well, Jester called it “gaining favor” with the Ruby of the Sea, but Molly figured out what she meant relatively easily.

Yasha and Beau had settled in two puffy armchairs along the wall, talking quietly about various things at their shared gym but still looking awkward as hell. Caduceus took the chair on the other side, followed closely by Nott.

Caleb moved to take the seat on the farthest edge of the couch, next to Nott. Molly sat beside him, crossing his legs on the coffee table and taking a swig of beer. It was good stuff, imported from somewhere in the Empire by the looks of it. It was almost knocked out of his hand as Jester launched herself onto the couch. “Scoot down, Molly, we still need room for me and Fjord!”

Fjord looked at the small couch and the four of them about to squish onto it, “Jester, I can just grab a pillow and sit on the floor-”

“No, you have to sit next to me!” she pouted. “We’re all friends here, right? You can have the end, okay?”

She moved over, grinning at Molly, “You don’t mind moving closer to Caleb, right Molly?”

“Like you said, we’re all friends here,” Molly said, but he raised a brow. There were very clear motives underlying this move, and he wanted her to know he saw through them. She just grinned and winked at him, nudging him so he was forced to move until his leg pressed right up against Caleb’s. Her mischievous smile was utterly contagious.

Caleb’s cheeks were red in the dark room as Jester started pulling up the movie on the tv that really could have been in a movie theater.

“Is this okay? I can sit on the floor if you want,” Molly whispered in Caleb’s ear.

The wizard shook his head, though his flush grew deeper in color. “Nein, it’s fine.”

Part way through the opening credits Caleb shifted like he was about to stand, which was disappointing, but Molly understood. This could be a lot of contact for someone who didn’t even casually hold hands unless he was having an anxiety attack. But instead he just took off his sweater and draped it over the side of the couch, leaning back in just a long sleeved tee shirt.

Unless Molly was mistaken, Caleb was even leaning into his arm. Though he was unwilling to be the one to break the contact, he needed more beer to wash down the unexpectedly massive piece of pizza. After Caleb nodded about wanting one too, he brought them both back a second bottle. Since there was no counter here, Molly gestured for Caleb to get the bottle cap on his, turning to the wizard as he popped it off with the pocket knife. Stretching, Molly wrapped an arm around the back of the sofa. It wasn’t touching Caleb’s shoulders, but he could lean into it if he wanted to.

To Molly’s delight, he did. And part way through the movie he realized that Caleb had fallen asleep on his shoulder, all the stress of the day melting away from the wizard’s features.


	13. Warmth

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> what would this fic be without Caleb backstory angst/extreme self hatred? so have some fluff, and some angst (in that order)

### Chapter 13: Warmth

Caleb was warm.

There was something warm wrapped around his shoulders, and he was exceedingly comfortable. It was rare that he didn’t have nightmares when he slept, much less wake up this cozy. Around him he could hear an occasional whisper from Jester and Beau, all calm and gentle. He knew he was safe, wherever he was, if his friends were there. Exhaustion weighed on him, keeping his eyes closed even as he felt a tentative hand rub his shoulder somewhere in the dark.

If he was a cat he would have purred. A fleeting impulse to cast polymorph on himself ran across his brain, but he was too comfortable to even attempt it.

It was nice. It was indescribably nice. Warmth bloomed in his chest and he never wanted the moment to end. He shifted closer, but then the movement stopped. Caleb frowned, wanting to keep the soft motion going, but not remembering what exactly the situation was.

Blinking open his eyes, he saw the ending credits of _Tusk Love_. He had slept through more than half of the movie, if his memory served. It always did. Still, he was a little hazy. Yasha wasn’t this cuddly, and Jester had been hoping to sit next to Fjord.

A flush crept up his cheeks as he recognized the skirt and purple kneecaps of the individual he had currently fallen asleep on. Caleb shifted slowly to sit straight upright, biting his lip and hoping desperately that Molly hadn’t noticed the deep red in his cheeks.

Of course that didn’t work. Caleb was starting to believe that darkvision would be the bane of his existence. Molly shifted forward, asking softly, “You okay?”

“Ja. Sorry for falling asleep on you,” he mumbled, feeling his shoulders hunch as he was discovered and craved the sweet release of death in favor of this embarrassment. His cheeks had to be as red as his hair.

Molly’s grip tightened around his shoulders, reassuring and extremely warm, “Don’t be. You looked like you needed to rest after everything today. I know I can be pretty comfortable too. I run hot.”

Caleb nodded, settling back just a bit and allowing himself just a bit more of the warmth. Just while the lights were still off, he could let himself lie here.

He could let himself enjoy the warmth of Molly’s casual embrace, take one or two fleeting glances at the tattoos winding down the arm wrapped around him, and just commit this moment to his memory. In this moment of peace, Caleb was almost grateful for his impeccable memory. In the dark he could pretend that perhaps he could deserve this wonderful moment, surrounded by his friends and being held.

All too soon Jester flicked the lights on and was thanking everyone for coming, passing their coats back. She was yawning, the weariness of the move finally catching up to her.. Caleb stood to grab his coat from her, eager to replace some of the warmth he’d felt on the couch with the familiar duster and large scarf. They weren’t quite warm enough, but it was still better than nothing.

“What did you think of _Tusk Love?”_ Caleb asked. “Did it hold a candle to the book?”

Molly laughed, grinning and polishing off the last of his beer. “They both had their merits, I suppose. I thought with an R rating they’d have more of the sex scenes, but I guess then it would just be porn.”

Beau snorted, rolling her eyes. “No amount of sex scenes could make up for that shitty plot.”

Jester pulled Caleb aside then, eyes shining with mischief as Beau and Molly started arguing about the merits of sex scenes and the overall quality of _Tusk Love_. “Caleb, you and Molly are so cute!”

“Was-” he corrected the Zemnian, still caught off guard, “What are you talking about?”

“You fell asleep on his shoulder!” she squeaked, and pulled out her phone. She showed him a picture, blurry and from a strange angle, but unmistakably was Caleb curled up on Molly’s shoulder, fast asleep. What really surprised Caleb was the tender look on Molly’s face as he held Caleb’s shoulder. In the blurred, speckled photograph Mollymauk looked vaguely ethereal lit up by the blue light of the television. “See? Do you want me to send you the picture? Are you guys dating? Have you had-”

“Jester, dear, he’s going to blush so badly all the blood will leave his legs for his cheeks and he won’t be able to walk home.” Molly wrapped an arm around her shoulders, whispering something softly in her ear as he did, but effectively saving Caleb from the interrogation.

Caleb shot him a grateful look and pulled his scarf up over his face, mumbling. “I should get going.”

“Yeah, I’ve got to get to the gym early tomorrow,” Beau said, moving to walk down the stairs with him.

They walked out of the apartment in relative silence, going for a few blocks before Beau spoke up. “So… Mollymauk.”

Caleb didn’t meet her gaze, staring at the sandstone below them. His shoes needed repairing before the rainy season came full force. “What about him?”

“I mean I knew you weren’t straight. Well, I don’t think I could room with someone who wasn’t queer, that’s not- Fuck, I mean that’s not what I’m trying to say. Do you know what I’m saying?” Beau stumbled over her words, still unable to get to the point easily, even though they’d known each other for two years.

His brow furrowed. He had a guess, but he could feign ignorance. “You haven’t said anything except that I am not straight.”

“Fuck, man, I know you’re not that dense. Even if you pretend you are sometimes. Just… Molly? Really?”

Caleb sighed deeply. “I don’t know what you’re actually asking.” He could gather the gist at this point, but he couldn’t really dodge a question that hadn’t been asked. “You are also not straight. And attracted to my friend Yasha.”

“Gods, Caleb, how have you been keeping her from me this whole time?” she groaned. “And the fact that she knew me already as ‘hot gym girl’? What am I supposed to do with that?”

He shrugged. “I think we’ve established I’m not good at this. Ask Jester.”

“Jester will tease me worse than you will,” she grumbled, kicking a can on the sidewalk and cursing when it wasn’t empty and got flat cola on her sneaker. Caleb tried not to smirk. The look Beau shot him told him he failed.

“She’s dealing with her own first crush. Well, second perhaps to the Traveler. She might sympathize.” Caleb doubted that, but he would still much rather Beau talk to her. He didn’t want this to be some sort of bonding experience where they talked about their affections. She could act on hers. He never would.

Beau rolled her eyes, opening the door for him. “Even if she did, she’d still tease me. There’s a reason Molly had to save you at the end of the party. You’ve just never been on the receiving end.”

That sounded perfectly logical. “I’m glad I’ve escaped her warpath. Was she like this when you were with Reani or Keg?”

“For a bit, until she realized neither were going to last. I don’t think she understands one night stands.” Beau flopped onto the couch, not bothering to take off her coat or shoes as she pulled out her phone.

Caleb unwound his scarf slowly, willing his shoulders to lower. Or for any part of his body to untense. He had been wound tight ever since he left Molly’s embrace on the couch. And there were far too many things wrong with that. “To be fair, I’m not sure I do either.” 

“Sex, Caleb. It’s just sex. I’m sure Molly could teach you.”

“Goodnight, Beauregard,” Caleb said firmly, walking a little quicker than normal to his bedroom. This was getting ridiculous. Molly was very attractive, yes, and maybe he did want a one night stand with Caleb, but there was no way that was happening. They were friends. After what Molly saw today, Caleb wouldn’t be surprised if the tiefling distanced himself. If he took a step back, realized Caleb wasn’t worth the trouble, that there were demons in his past that didn’t speak Infernal and couldn’t be reasoned with. Realized Caleb didn’t deserve that kind of company.

Molly would probably realize that Caleb was broken.

Still, Caleb couldn’t help the blush in his cheeks. First Jester, now Beau. When Nott figured out what was going on, he would never hear the end of it. Even after teleporting her family here from Felderwin, she considered him like her child. Caleb had pointed out many times that she had an actual son to worry about, one who owned a crossbow and was quickly getting surer aim and worse ideas.

Regardless, she stayed with him. And so Caleb did everything he could to help her regain her halfling form. He would need to speak to Yussa about that ordeal soon. After he translated all the latest tomes. That was something much easier to dwell on.

His phone buzzed in his coat pocket as he stripped it off. Caleb blinked and grabbed it, wondering if he forgot something at Jester’s apartment. Two texts appeared from Mollymauk.

>   
>  **Mollymauk Tealeaf:** Hey, Caleb  
>  **Mollymauk Tealeaf:** I just wanted you to know I got Jester to delete that picture  
> 

His phone buzzed again in his hand, startling him into dropping the phone on the floor before scrambling to grab it again. Since he was finally alone the nerves of the day started creeping up in full force. A tremor in his hands was the least of his worries. 

>   
>  **Mollymauk Tealeaf:** It seemed like you didn’t like her having it (I may have a copy saved, in case you wanted it, but I won’t share it like she will)  
>  **Mollymauk Tealeaf:** Do you want a copy?  
> 

Caleb set the phone down, trying to think about what on Earth had happened today. Molly had comforted him at Yussa’s tower, distracted him back at Caleb’s apartment, gave him the wonderful present of the Infernal CDs, let him fall asleep on Molly’s shoulder, and managed to save him from Jester. It was hard to ignore the feeling, but what had happened this morning only solidified Caleb’s feelings on the matter.

Mollymauk was too good. Caleb didn’t deserve anything from him, not his company, not his friendship, nothing. He was selfish enough to want friendship from the tiefling, to stay with him like he stayed with Jester, Nott, Beauregard, and Caduceus. He did not deserve their company. Yasha was getting there. She was getting better. Doing better. Doing good in the world.

Caleb deserved none of their kindness.

Not after what he had done.

After the near disaster this morning of Molly seeing him in Yussa’s tower, on top of every social interaction since, Caleb was exhausted.

He slipped into a pair of threadbare flannel pajamas, holding onto what shred of sanity he felt like he had left after the end of the day. He put the CD player beside him on the plain bed and played the album Molly had brought him just loud enough to cover up any noise, ignoring how his hands shook and fumbled with the CD.

With that Caleb let the tears take him, trying to make out the lyrics over the screams in his ears and racking sobs that shook through his chest.

Somewhere on the surface of his desk, his phone buzzed again, unheard and unanswered.


	14. Truths Laid Bare

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Molly falls deeper, in more ways than one.

### Chapter 14: Truths Laid Bare

Molly stared at his phone, the unanswered messages to Caleb piling up. He was worried about the wizard after yesterday. Going to the Tidepeak Tower seemed to put him on edge for the rest of the afternoon, and Molly never would have guessed Caleb would be so comfortable as to fall asleep on him. He must have been exhausted. The picture Jester took was a little blurred around the edges, but that just made it look softer. Like it was captured twenty years ago, not last night, and saved carefully in a photo album, not because of its quality but to save the moment it captured. Caleb looked ten years younger whenever he slept, and Molly had been trying not to stare. Of course Jester had caught him anyways.

It was adorable, but Caleb clearly wished he hadn’t done it. So he _had_ to have been completely exhausted.

And now he was probably asleep, nowhere near his phone.

>   
>  **Molly:** Hey, Caleb  
>  **Molly:** I just wanted you to know I got Jester to delete that picture  
>  **Molly:** It seemed like you didn’t like her having it (I may have a copy saved, in case you wanted it, but I won’t share it like she will)  
>  **Molly:** Do you want a copy?  
> 

The texts taunted Molly. Reminded him that the two of them had no plans today. Even if Molly wanted to ask Caleb out for coffee or something, just to check up on him, he had work in an hour, and a shift at the Lavish Chateau after closing shop for Gustav.

Molly hadn’t let himself wake up early, knowing he would just worry about how Caleb hadn’t texted him. It seemed a little odd to him that he was so concerned, but over these past few weeks he and Caleb had become closer than he ever expected from Yasha’s caginess whenever the subject was broached. So when his phone buzzed with a text on the subway ride to work, Molly barely tried to contain his heart from soaring.

Gods he was in deep.

>   
>  **Caleb:** I do not mind that you have the picture. Thank you for talking to Jester.  
> 

Molly couldn’t actually tell if anything was wrong, and couldn’t really text much today anyways. Gustav never let him use his phone on the clock, and he had to be at work in… Well he’d been later before.

He climbed out of the subway, typing back a quick message.

>   
>  **Molly:** Good! I’ve got work today, so I can’t text much  
> 

Molly typed out a quick message saying Caleb was free to swing by and relieve him of his boredom, but his finger hovered over the send button without hitting it. He’d gotten confirmation that Caleb was okay enough to text at least. It didn’t feel the same as seeing him in person, trying to make him blush, but that should have been okay.

He deleted the message.

>   
>  **Caleb:** Have a nice day, Mollymauk. I’ll see you next week.  
> 

Shoving his feelings back down, Molly sighed deeply.

>   
>  **Molly:** See you  
> 

It would have to do.

He spent the day planning where he could bring Caleb to continue to teach him Infernal, and trying to ignore how he was spending just as much time on planning the lessons these days as he would for any date. The ancient computer that Desmond had the cash register hooked up to practically wheezed every time he looked up a new idea, but looking at his phone probably would have bummed him out even more. Especially if Gustav made another speech about how it was unprofessional. Desmond didn’t usually care, but he was off on another trip to Northern Wildemount to look for new items for the shop.

Luckily he had a few scheduled tarot readings, and a fair amount of walk-ins as the weekend neared. Almost half of them were regulars looking for advice on Winter’s Crest gifts. Molly knew all of them well, and a lot of their relatives to begin with since they felt they needed “guidance” from the cards every time they so much as chose a breakfast cereal. It was an easy day.

A new restaurant that was built in some ludicrously rich ancient person’s wine cellar was the latest place to take your date these days, according to all of Molly’s best sources. Well, his carefully curated social media feeds at least.

It was strung up with soft string lights and enchanted with druidic magic so that fresh green vines twined with the cords of lights. Molly figured the little twinkling lights would be enough to not feel claustrophobic on their way to drink too expensive wine and hide the check from Caleb. Talking about different wines would be a good way to practice some of the more fancy Infernal Molly never used in day to day life. He wasn’t sure he’d talked to Caleb at all about formal cases. Not to mention the last time Caleb got two drinks in him he was comfortable enough to fall asleep on Molly’s shoulder.

Maybe with a little wine the man could cut loose for a minute.

Molly could tolerate a little claustrophobia for that, he told himself. Especially if he had fancy wine to get the taste of grave dirt out of his mouth.

He considered texting Caleb a link to the place’s website for confirmation, but he knew Caleb would manage to find the few reviews calling the place too expensive, even though they were posh enough not to post any prices on their website.

Chewing his lip, he pulled out his phone anyways and sent a couple of pictures of the place instead, just to run the idea by him. And maybe to check in on Caleb’s tone over text, just to see if he was okay.

>   
>  **Molly:** I was thinking here for your next infernal lesson?  
>  **Molly:** We can practice the fancy stuff I always forget exists lol  
> 

Surprising Molly, his phone buzzed not long after. Unsurprisingly, Caleb had managed to point out the one thing Molly knew he would.

>   
>  **Caleb:** That looks very expensive.  
> 

Keeping an eye out and an ear for Gustav coming in from the back, Molly kept at it. He wasn’t backing down from this that easily.

>   
>  **Molly:** So is the Lavish Chateau
> 
> **Caleb:** I don’t eat there either.
> 
> **Molly:** I work there, silly  
>  **Molly:** I can afford to spend some money on you
> 
> **Caleb:** I have not forgotten, but you were teaching me Infernal as a favor for using the books in the store. It’s hardly an even trade if you spend money anyways.
> 
> **Molly:** You can pay me back with your wonderful company
> 
> **Caleb:** My company is hardly worth that.
> 
> **Molly:** Agree to disagree  
>  **Molly:** Should I find a different place, or will you let me drag you here?  
> 

Gods he could be infuriating. But he didn’t seem much more upset than he did on any given day. Which meant Molly had no excuse to drop in on Caleb today.

Maybe he’d get coffee across the street on his break.

Who was he kidding? He always did that, hoping to catch a glance of Caleb, either at the counter or curled up in a blanket in his study.

His phone lit up in his hand as he pondered the options.

>   
>  **Caleb:** If you insist, Mollymauk. Whatever makes you happy.  
> 

That would do. That would do quite nicely.

Molly brushed up a bit on the fancier dialects of Infernal before meeting Caleb at the bookstore next week, watching a few pompous videos of tieflings at wine tastings. It wasn’t like he was doing much else on a lazy Whelsen morning. He had a few conversations in passing with the wizard in question during his coffee breaks throughout the week, but he was excited to spend an afternoon together again.

Caleb had texted this morning, asking if he needed to dress up. Molly wasn’t sure if Caleb even owned a better coat. Regardless, this place wasn’t exactly black tie, it was just the latest place all the hipsters had glommed onto in the city to shower with praise and their paychecks. The pictures all had the pompous type of customer that wore enchanted weapons or jewelry just for fun. It wasn’t exactly Molly or Caleb’s style, but the idea of making fun of it all together was very promising.

After spending too long assuring Caleb that he always looked fine while not giving away that he was extremely attracted to the ridiculous self loathing wizard, it was time to get to the bookstore early and bother Nott or Jester.

“Anything new and exciting to test on me today?” he asked, leaning on the counter and winking at a disgruntled Nott.

She shot him a look that was half disapproval, and half excitement. She absolutely had something. “Maybe.”

“Well, sign me up for it,” he said, grabbing a few silver out of his pouch. The strange things Nott decided to put together were either amazing, or terrifying enough to be worth every copper for the experience. Jester made strange concoctions on occasion too, but hers were always sickeningly sweet. “And one of whatever Caleb drinks,” he added after a thought. They could take a walk in the park before they went to the restaurant. It would make more sense to go closer to dinner anyways.

And Molly would do just about anything to stretch out the visit.

Typically they would lose track of time. Well, Molly would, and Caleb didn’t seem to mind, even when he always knew the exact minute without looking at a clock. Today was the first day Molly was actively planning on losing track of time. It had been ridiculously nice seeing Caleb for more than half of the day last week, even if he did have a bit of a breakdown during.

Molly was just glad he was there.

Nott shot him a look that was partially interested, but also a warning. Molly answered with a blinding grin in turn, bringing the drinks downstairs and striking up a light conversation with Calianna before Caleb got there. She was quite open, telling Molly about how Caleb and Yasha had helped her make sure that no one else was hurt by the people who raised her.

Every story someone told about Caleb was how he had taken some strange risk in an attempt to help them all. That or some crazy story of how much he cared about them shown in some strange spell or present.

It was endearing, but it just made Molly more upset that Caleb didn’t manage to see any of the good in himself.

Waving goodbye to Calianna as he heard the small tinkle of the bell, Molly grabbed Caleb’s coffee (some dark roasted black thing with enough espresso to kill an elephant).

And then it was routine. Molly greeted Caleb in Infernal, offered him the coffee, trying not to be too enamored with how Caleb stumbled over the words to describe the coffee. Molly curled up with him on the couch, drinking the strange concoction Nott had given him. It was fruity, which was surprising for coffee, but somehow worked well.

Molly taught Caleb some of the new words they’d be trying at the restaurant, reveling in the moments when Caleb’s gaze seemed to linger on his legs as he crossed his legs in a skirt, or his lips as he left a lipstick stain on the to go cup. Eventually he pulled up the videos of the people drinking wine and reviewing it in Infernal, moving to lean into the wizard as they crowded over his phone. It was cozy, it was intimate, and Molly was happy.

By the time they took their slow walk through the park to the new restaurant, Molly was practically on cloud nine. He didn’t mind getting in the elevator and going what had to be way too deep under the ground. He was rational, he was calm, and he knew he was safe.

The twinkling lights were softer and prettier in person, and the vines kept the space from feeling like it was truly underground. The smell wasn’t of dirt either, but of cold stone. Caleb didn’t have any reason to worry about Molly because Molly was okay. This was fine.

It was fine as they ordered food and wine, and it was fine as they quietly poked fun at the pretentious accent of their waiter in Infernal once the Tabaxi had left the table, it was more than fine when Caleb attempted the accent and Infernal at the same time and Molly laughed so hard he thought he would rupture his spleen.

It was fine all the way up until they started walking out the long winding hallways and the ground began to shake. Stone tumbled around them, and all Molly could smell was dirt. The lights flickered out overhead and they were submerged in darkness.


	15. Vulnerabilities

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Caleb gets to utilize every grounding exercise that Pumat taught him, before remembering that he's a goddamn wizard.

### Chapter 15: Vulnerabilities

“Scheiße,” Caleb swore under his breath as the ground shook beneath him, knocking him off balance and onto his ass in complete darkness. He groped around blindly, finding his way to his feet “Mollymauk, are you okay?”

Silence.

Panic gripped his heart, cold and slow fingers wrapping around the pulsing organ, squeezing gently. He licked his dry lips, shooting up four globules of light into the cavernous space and trying to ignore the shaking of his hands. The smell of old dirt permeated the air, and rubble rested all around him. The tunnel was blocked off on either side, but he had plenty of space.

Molly was in the corner, sitting upright. One of the fingers unhooked itself from his pounding heart in pure relief. “Mollymauk, were you hurt?”

He was curled around his knees, shaking like a leaf and unresponsive. Even his tail was wrapped around him, curling at his ankles.

“Mollymauk,” Caleb crouched beside the tiefling. “Can you lift your head to show me you’re not hurt? Or just nod if you’re okay?”

There was a moment of quiet before Molly’s head slowly raised up and fell back down.

A breath Caleb didn’t know he was holding rushed out of him. “Gut, gut. Would you like me to touch you, or keep distance?”

Molly was still trembling, but leaned gently into him, inviting touch. Caleb wrapped a tentative arm around his shoulders. “Is this okay?”

He nodded again, and his tail seemed to instinctively latch itself around Caleb’s wrist. Caleb had never seen Molly like this. All sense of bravado and exuberance was gone, and the terror was laid bare. It hurt to see, but at the very least he knew he could help. 

This was what Caleb knew best.

Caleb rubbed Molly’s shoulder gently through the fabric of his red coat, speaking softly, “I’m right here with you. We have plenty of space. Plenty of air.” Though he wasn’t completely familiar with all the fears surrounding claustrophobia, he was pretty sure that was part of it.

“We’re safe, you and I. Can you nod if you’re following me?”

Molly nodded once into his chest, still trembling. Caleb could feel a light drip on his hand as he realized Molly was crying. He went on, “Gut, Mollymauk. I’m glad you’re with me. I’m glad we’re both safe together. Can you take a breath with me? I’ll count for it, you just have to follow me.”

There was another pause but Molly nodded again. Caleb took a deep breath, counting aloud in Infernal. Molly’s chest rose and fell with his own. He brought them through a few breaths together.

“Can you speak now, Molly? It’s okay if you cannot.”

“Yeah,” he said, though it was barely a breath.

Caleb couldn’t help but feel a small, sad smile spread across his face. At least all those sessions with Pumat were helpful for something. “Wonderful. It’s good to hear your voice. I’m going to ask some questions, they’re supposed to help ground you. Bring you back to this moment here with me.”

Molly didn’t answer aloud again, just nodding once more.

“What’s one thing that you can feel?” Caleb asked gently.

Another long pause before Molly finally said, “Your hand.”

“Perfect. Focus on that. Think just about that and take another deep breath, okay? I’ll count again.” He counted in infernal and felt Molly’s chest rise and fall, keeping up a constant rhythm rubbing Mollymauk’s shoulder.

“Now something you can smell.”

“Books. You smell like books,” Molly mumbled, breathing in deeply on his own.

Caleb blinked at the thought, though he supposed it made sense. He was rarely away from books. Even now he felt his spellbook pressing into the side not up against Molly. “And something you can see.”

Molly pulled back then, looking Caleb dead in the eye. “You.”

Caleb flushed gently at that, but willed himself not to get distracted. He took his free hand and rifled in the pocket of his coat for the tin of strange sour candies he kept for situations like this. “Something you can taste,” he said, offering the open tin to Molly where he knew he could see it. “Be warned, they’re sour, but it helps. I promise.”

Tentatively, Molly raised a shaking hand and took one of the little lemon things. Caleb smiled a little more genuinely at the pucker on Molly’s face, tucking away the tin and wiping a tear from Molly’s cheek.

Caleb went back to focusing on his hand on Molly’s shoulder. A good tether for both of them. “I don’t have anything to play music, but you can listen to the sound of my voice. You and I are both safe. They’re probably working on the other side of the wall right now to get us out. We have plenty of space and if you’d like I can even cast a spell that would guarantee we stay comfortable for eight hours. Or one that would help dig us out.” The Tiny Hut might be less helpful for the claustrophobia, but one of his cat paws could probably help clear the tunnel of enough rubble for them to sneak through. Caleb didn’t know enough about the structure of it though. The thought of it collapsing more was worrying.

“Don’t leave.” Molly gently wound his fingers into Caleb’s free hand, as if willing him to stay. His head fell back onto Caleb’s shoulder.

“Of course. I’m right here. You’re not alone. You’re safe.”

Molly nodded, squeezing his hand. “Thank you. I… thank you.”

Caleb gently squeezed back as his mind raced. He took in their surroundings again. As calm as he sounded for Molly, he wanted to get them out. He couldn’t imagine being physically trapped in a place that triggered him. Well he could imagine it, and he had lived it. As soon as it was within his power, nothing stopped him from getting out of that place. “Of course, Mollymauk. This is something I know how not to mess up.”

Purple fingers entwined with pale white ones in the dim light cast by Caleb’s lights. Silence took the room again until Molly asked something softly. “How did you know my mouth tasted like dirt?”

Caleb swallowed. “Mine sometimes tastes like ash. Or blood.”

Molly’s fingers squeezed tighter. A thought dawned on Caleb. He’d gotten out of the habit of using his more difficult spells, but he still had them prepared. His component pouch rested faithfully in an inner pocket of his coat. The space was big enough, if he cleared some of the stones away. “It occurs to me that I could draw a teleportation circle on the stone and bring us to Yussa’s tower. I think the floor would take well to that, and there’s enough space. Would you like that, or would you rather wait here?” He’d been so worried about making Molly feel better he forgot he could just poof them out. “It will take me about ten minutes to draw.”

Silence settled around them, and Caleb almost asked if Molly had heard him or slipped back into whatever flashback he was in before Molly spoke. “I won’t make you go back there.”

“I’ll be fine. If it would make you feel better, I’d be happy to do it, Molly.” Caleb almost groaned as he remembered how Molly had seen him nearly have a meltdown in the damned tower. “I’d deal with whatever itches my scars want to have if it would help you out of this. I’ve been there; I know it’s not fun.” He swallowed, ignoring the vulnerability he was showing. This was for Molly, he could suck it up. He could manage not to get lost in the screaming, not right now. Not when Molly was tethering him to this space. Not when Molly might need him to cast a spell.

Molly shifted beside him. “We could leave the tower right afterwards, right?”

“Yes. I could probably speed up the spell too. One minute. Just one minute.” Caleb squeezed Molly’s hand again. If this wasn’t a reason to use up some of his magical energy for the day, he didn’t know what was. “Could you sit here and be okay for one minute? I have to speak arcane words, so I won’t be able to talk with you.”

“One minute?” Molly asked, a little glimmer of hope in his eyes, almost lost in the emptiness but still shining.

“One minute, and however long it takes me to clear a ten foot circle,” Caleb admitted. “I’ll send a message to Wensforth, clear the space, and then get up to draw a chalk circle for one minute.” Never mind that the cost of doing so would be worth almost three times over what they’d spent on this silly wine cellar. Molly didn’t need to know that. Molly needed to feel safe. If fifty gold worth of fancy chalk was all it took to break Caleb out of his flashbacks, he’d be broke by now. Broke but happy.

“And you’ll be okay?” Molly asked, his voice far too small.

Caleb nodded, shaking the sour candies. “I’ll be ready this time.”

Molly rolled over the candy on his tongue and nodded. “I can do one minute.”

“I can still talk while I’m clearing the space, but that might take a bit. I’m not very strong.” Molly nodded and he smiled, giving Molly’s shoulder a reassuring squeeze before pulling back. Opening up his coat he rifled around until he found his component pouch.

The little copper wire twisted around fingers as he pictured Yussa’s goblin servant in his mind. “Hello, Wensforth. I’m currently trapped in a cave in with Mollymauk, who you met the last time we spoke. I’ll need to teleport shortly.”

“I’ll be waiting for you in the chamber. If you are injured or require other assistance, I’ll await another message.” Wensforth always answered immediately, never sounding panicked. Of course, he’d never had the pleasure of having Trent Ikithon invade his thoughts.

There was no time to think about that. “I’m going to start clearing the space now, okay?”

Molly nodded, sitting up a little straighter. “Okay.” He still didn’t look like himself, and it grated at Caleb’s chest, a dull ache.

“We’ll be out soon, what would you like to do afterwards?” Caleb asked, standing up and beginning to clear away the rubble.

Molly was quiet, wrapping his arms around his knees again. “I dunno. What do you usually do?”

“I’m not a very healthy example,” Caleb mumbled, shoving large chunks of stone out of the ten foot circle. He usually just went home and gave into it. Wept until there was nothing left and returned to his life like a husk. “Yasha likes to go to the gym. I think Fjord eats food afterwards? I believe Calianna naps.”

“I could use a stiff drink,” Molly almost grumbled, sounding much more like himself.

Caleb chuckled, “That’s what you call an unhealthy coping mechanism. Or self medicating. Or both. I wouldn’t recommend it.”

“Spoil sport,” Molly said, but there was a hint of his teasing tone back in his voice. “Can I have another lemon thingy?”

The tin took a moment to dig back out of his pocket, but Caleb soon had it ready to pass back over. “Still doing okay?”

“Relatively. I like these. I should get some,” Molly said, popping two more in his mouth. Caleb grimaced at the sour he knew Molly was tasting. Extremely grounding, but very very sour.

“I’ll pick you up a tin the next time I see them,” Caleb said, clearing away the last of the rubble. “Now I’m going to have to start the spell. Can you count your breaths for a minute?”

Molly nodded, currently balancing the lemon candies on his stuck out tongue. “Mhmm.”

Caleb fished out the chalk, tracing the circle quickly, letting the magic flow through him as he spoke the familiar arcane words. Though he didn’t use the expensive spell often, he always had it prepared for a quick escape. He had done enough favors to have teleportation sigils memorized from all over Wildemount. Even a few from Tal’Dorei, though he hadn’t ever tried them.

He paused right before the spell was complete, waving Molly over and taking his hand as he completed the last few lines and brought them to Yussa’s. Molly stumbled as they fell through, clutching at Caleb’s coat. It was an odd sensation that made Caleb’s stomach flip flop every time. He grabbed the tiefling’s shoulders, steadying him. “You okay? Was that your first time?”

“Yeah,” Molly said in a huff, not letting go of him.

Caleb gave a little wave to Wensforth in an attempt to say with just a move of his hand, “we’re fine, we’ll be out in a minute.” Luckily the little goblin man seemed to see the state Caleb’s friend was in and ducked out.

“Hey, you’re okay. We’re okay.” Caleb rubbed small circles with his thumbs over Molly’s shoulders as he let out a shaky sob into his chest.

Molly pulled him into a full hug, almost knocking the wind out of him. “Fuck. Thank you. I thought we… I just… Thank you.” Each word was stilted as his breath kept hitching, coming out in small gasps.

Caleb wrapped his arms around the tiefling tightly, trying his best to avoid the horns and catching on any jewelry. “Of course. If I could teleport away from mine, I would too,” he mumbled into the crook of Molly’s neck, blushing slightly but not finding anywhere else where he could miss the horns.

“Still. That was… You’re amazing. Thank you.” Molly took a deep breath and pulled back, plastering a very shaky smile on his face.

Frowning, Caleb rubbed away another tear. “You don’t have to be okay right now, ja? No one expects that from you.”

Biting his lip but nodding, Molly pulled back further to just hold Caleb’s hand. “Let’s get out of here, yeah?”

Laced fingers together and a soft smile on his lips, Caleb squeezed Molly’s hand gently. “As long as you’re ready.”

“I just want to go home.”


	16. Tethered

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Caleb is really really good at grounding techniques, and Molly's crush is only getting worse.

### Chapter 16: Tethered

A warm, soft hand resting in his own. A small set of calluses on the first finger and thumb, where the hand has held many pens. A hand wrapped around his like a tether. As if he might fly away like a balloon if it left him.

A twinge of deeply sour lemon still on his tongue as candy rolled around his mouth, keeping the taste of grave dirt at bay.

The rush of wind that swirled around the crack in the taxi window that reminded him he was not trapped. Molly could breathe. And he did, deeply, smelling the cold winter air.

The soft, deep sound of Caleb counting in Infernal, guiding his breaths so he didn’t succumb to the panic in his chest. His Zemnian accent didn’t fully leave him even though he’d been practicing extensively. As his breath became normal, the voice shifted back to Common. Caleb had checked the news on his phone; it was just a freak earthquake. Wasn’t going to happen again. They were safe. The voice drifted in and out of his focus, always soft, always calm.

By the time the taxi pulled up at Molly’s apartment, he almost felt like he could function again. “Do you… Do you want to come in? I don’t think Yasha would mind.”

“I won’t leave you alone,” Caleb said plainly, as if it was the clearest thing in the world to do.

Molly’s heart lurched just slightly in his chest, despite still being a bit adrift. “Thank you.”

“Would you like Yasha to know what happened, or not?” Caleb asked, leaning across Molly to open the cab door for him.

He swallowed, thinking of Yasha’s stoic figure. She would worry. She would worry and he was fine now, so there was no need. “No. I… I’m fine now. If she hears about the earthquake I might tell her. But not now. I’m fine.”

Caleb shot him a look filled with concern, words painted clearly across his face saying he didn’t believe Molly in the slightest. “Then I will not tell her.”

“Thank you.”

“Careful, you’re starting to sound like a broken record there, Mollymauk,” Caleb said, trying to inject a little teasing back into the conversation as he recaptured Molly’s hand and started walking towards the door of the apartment.

Molly squeezed the fingers around his, taking another deep breath. “I could thank you a million times for this, and it still wouldn’t be enough. I didn’t even know how… I never knew it could be like that,” he mumbled, unsure if he meant the severity of the panic attack, or how well the grounding techniques had worked in the moment. Both, he supposed. He took advantage of the moment of unlocking the doors to avoid eye contact.

“You deserve my help more than I deserve your thanks,” Caleb said with a shrug, holding the open apartment door so Molly could walk in first.

That was an odd thing to say.

Molly didn’t know how to respond, so he didn’t.

“Perhaps the stairs would be better than the elevator?” Caleb asked softly, looking to him for confirmation.

The thought of the metal doors closing in on him wasn’t quite as bad as the smell of grave dirt, but it still didn’t sound nice. “It’s on the seventh floor. I can meet you up there.”

The wizard just shook his head, holding open the door for Molly again. “I may not be very strong, but I can keep up. I will not leave you alone. Stairwells can be small too.”

“There’s airflow,” Molly mumbled, not really wanting to be alone regardless. “You don’t have to.”

Caleb ignored him, and for that Molly was grateful. They took it slow, and the methodical movement of each step was good. Every once in a while Molly would ask for another lemon flavored candy, but other than that they moved in careful silence.

For once Molly was grateful for it. Caleb didn’t pry, didn’t fill the silence with chatter, didn’t make Molly feel like any more of a freak than he already did. 

Despite insisting he would be fine, Caleb was a little out of breath by the time they made it to the seventh floor. Molly fumbled with his keys for a moment so they could both take a moment in the quiet before having to face anyone but themselves.

“Do you want me to stay? Now that you’re home…” Caleb trailed off, unsure. Molly was safe, physically. But if he asked Caleb to stay he knew that he would in a heartbeat.

Molly bit his lip, hand on the door knob. “Just for a bit? I won’t keep you. I know you have tomorrow off work, but you need to sleep, or research, or whatever it is you do at night.” If he was feeling better he might have made a joke.

“If you would feel better not being alone in this, I will stay as long as you need me.” Caleb caught Molly’s free hand and squeezed it gently.

Tears pricked in the corners of Molly’s eyes. “Caleb Widogast, you are a saint.”

“Mollymauk Tealeaf, you are delusional, but I’m glad you’re feeling better,” Caleb said with a soft smile dancing on his lips, tentative but still sending a pang straight to Molly’s chest.

Fuck.

Molly wasn’t in the right frame of mind. He was emotionally and physically drained, and almost trembling with both the fatigue and the exhaustion. But all he could think about was how, overwhelmingly in that moment, he wanted to kiss Caleb.

Not right now. Not when all Caleb held in his heart for Molly would be pity. Not when Caleb had seen him at his worst.

Still…

Caleb had seen Molly snap, break down, and fall to pieces. He had seen some of the worst, and he was still here. He was offering to stay. He cared.

He couldn’t kiss Caleb. But he could say, “Stay.”

And Caleb did, waving to Yasha and making some excuse Molly barely heard before they disappeared into Molly’s bedroom.

Molly closed the door with a shaky sigh, trying to focus on how Caleb looked around the room, taking in all of the clashing colors, knicknacks, tapestries, textures. It was loud and obnoxious, and for the first time in what felt like days, but couldn’t have been more than an hour or two, Molly could breathe. This was a safe place. Cold night air flowed in from the cracked window and it smelled simply of lavender and incense.

“Shoes off. The carpet’s from Marquet and it cost a fortune,” Molly said, pulling off his own shoes and leaving them by the door.

Caleb awkwardly tugged off his boots while standing, Molly catching him with a light, teasing smirk. The longer he spent away from the smell of dirt, the more he started to feel like himself. Of course holding Caleb with one hand on his shoulder and one on his waist was not great for Molly’s imagination. Caleb being in his room period was not great for his imagination. “You okay there?” he asked, smirk only growing.

“My legs might be a _bit_ tired from the walk up,” Caleb said, teasing right back.

He grinned at the wizard and shed his coat, inviting Caleb to do the same and patting the bed beside him. Watching the redhead awkwardly fumble his way into the pile of vibrant throw pillows was completely adorable.

Molly moved around the pillows until they were both cozy and covered his eyes with the back of his arm. “Fucking hell. I know you said I shouldn't keep thanking you, but still.” 

Caleb was still fumbling a little bit, a pink tinge to his cheeks as he just ended up holding a red and purple pillow to his chest. “Of course. Do you need anything? Water? Food? We could get something delivered.”

Chewing his lip, Molly grabbed his phone. “Delivery is a good idea. Do you like Xhorasian?”

“Sure.”

“I like that rice thing that’s hard to pronounce,” Molly mumbled, pulling up the local takeout place’s menu on his phone.

Of course Caleb said the name of the dish flawlessly, and they found out it was both of their favorites. Molly finally felt well enough to ask Yasha if she wanted anything, and came back almost glowing when she had admitted she would be spending the evening with Beau. Well, Beau and Jester. But still.

Standing in the doorframe of his bedroom and watching Caleb inspect the seams of the pillow he was holding like it was fascinating, Molly called in their takeout order and let the night watchman on the bottom floor know that they could let them up whenever it arrived.

Molly flopped back down on the bed, resting on his side and propping up his head with one arm. Caleb’s cheeks were still a gentle pink. “You cold? I know Yasha keeps it freezing in here when I’m not around.”

“Nein, I- I am quite comfortable.” Caleb still fidgeted with the pillow in his arms.

“You sure? I run hot, one hug and you’d be back up to human temperature.”

“Yasha is also human.” Caleb raised a brow. “Technically.”

Molly shrugged, “The offer is open.”

“Mollymauk,” Caleb started, a slight crease in his brow as he paused, “I’m going to ask you something, but if it makes you uncomfortable you don’t have to. Or I can leave. I just feel like I need to say it.”

Molly grabbed the nervous wizard’s hand and squeezed it gently. “If you keep telling me you can leave I’ll start to feel like you don’t want to keep me company.” He tried to say it teasingly, but too much raw fear came through.

Caleb squeezed his hand back, “Then I will not bring it up again until you ask me to go.”

“What if I never ask?”

“You have work before I do.” Caleb blinked, like it was the easiest answer in the world. That he would be that willing to stay the night if Molly needed him. “I might need a phone charger to text Beau not to send out search and rescue, or worse, call Nott,” he said, grimacing at the thought.

Molly was quiet for a moment. It was hard to think critically about the whole thing when the day had left him emotionally raw. Still, Caleb’s hand rested in his own, soft, a little too cold from the winter air, and a welcome tether. “You had a question.”

The eye contact was broken again. “I was just going to offer… Now, I know I’m being hypocritical, in that I’ve told you very little about my past. It is still very difficult to talk about. But tonight, you did not want me to talk to Yasha about what happened. Have you ever spoken to someone about this?”

“Not like you mean. Yasha knows most of it,” Molly mumbled, suddenly thankful that eye contact was deemed unnecessary. He let himself fall backwards on the bed, staring up at the colorful curtains and string lights instead.

“And I’m sure she has attempted to get you to talk to Pumat or Caduceus.”

“You know how she is. I don’t want to talk to them. Even now that Caduceus isn’t a stranger, it’s still weird.”

Caleb nodded, still staring into the seams of the pillow. “I know it’s very difficult. It takes me quite a long time to open up about what happened in my past. But,” he swallowed, his accent growing thicker, “it… I cannot say it hasn’t helped. To have people who know. Who I can come to when it won’t stop, who won’t judge me, who I can ask for… for help. People I know I could stop by and talk if I needed to. Even just to send a text to in the middle of the night and know that someone else knows.”

The redhead shot upright then, startling Molly as he looked at him intensely. “I’ll say it again; it is very hypocritical of me, I know, without telling you first. I’m not ready for that yet, but I wanted to offer… I could be that person for you, Mollymauk, if you need. Need someone to talk to, I mean.”

Molly’s breath caught in his throat. “I don’t… You would… You’d put up with all of this again?”

A small smile with no real humor in it crossed Caleb’s lips. “If we are going to be friends, you will likely see much worse from me, unfortunately. And for what it’s worth, I’ve gotten relatively good at this over the past four years. I’m never just ‘putting up’ with you either. I like spending time with you, and I want you to be okay.”

“Okay,” Molly repeated, staring back up at his ceiling. “Yeah, I guess that could be nice,” he said softly, thinking about being able to call Caleb and just be able to hear his voice if he was ever in that much of a panic again. Like that freight elevator a few years back that smelled too dirty for comfort, or how it all sometimes gripped him when he walked by a graveyard.

“I don’t want to pressure you into it. It doesn’t have to be now, and it doesn’t have to be all of it. Just enough that you think might help.”

He sighed deeply, wishing the ragged sound was a bit more steady. “If I’m going to tell the story, I might as well tell the whole thing,” he mumbled, running his thumb over Caleb’s knuckles.

“My first memory, my oldest memory is dirt in my face, underground.” Molly twisted his blanket around the fingers of his free hand, staring down at the patterned patchwork quilt.

“I woke up without any names, or any past, buried in the ground four years ago. I had to dig myself out not to suffocate, and I was alone on the side of the road. Yasha and Desmond were traveling through the Greying Wildlands, found me walking around practically catatonic and just mumbling ‘empty.’ Desmond thought it could be M. T. That’s where Mollymauk Tealeaf came from, once I had any sense of myself. 

“I had to relearn how to speak, write, everything. Some things came quicker than others, but by the time they were leaving I had enough sense to ask to join them. I wanted nothing to do with anything where I was, where whoever I was had gone around fucking shit up enough to end up in a shallow grave everyone forgot about.” Molly’s voice was low and steady, but he was grateful for the grip around his hand. Caleb listened quietly, letting him talk.

A swell of old anger filled his chest. “Some asshole got buried in the dirt, and I want nothing to do with him. Whoever that was came to that end, and I want nothing to do with that. Whatever it was, it doesn't feel good when something creeps through; I don't like it. I don't want anything to do with it. It all sounds terrible. I don't want to remember anything. I don't want to have anybody else's baggage in my head and I don't want anybody else's problems, thoughts, ideas.

“I like this person, right now is a good person. Is a fine person. Is a happy person. I’m happy!” He fell silent, eyes darting over to Caleb nervously. The wizard had moved closer, sitting up a little and using his free hand to wipe away a tear. Molly hadn’t even realized he’d been crying. “I guess I don’t look very happy right now, huh?”

Caleb smiled softly, shaking his head. “That doesn’t matter. I’m glad you are who you are, and I’m grateful you were able to tell me. Is there anything I can do right now? To help?”

Molly had to ask, though his voice was barely a whisper, “So you don’t mind?”

“Mind what?” Caleb cocked his head.

“I… I don’t know what I did in my past. What I might have done to end up in the dirt, who might come looking for me, who I even am,” Molly’s voice started to crack as all the insecurities he bottled up behind layer and layer of bullshit came spilling out.

Caleb squeezed his hand firmly. “I’m a firm believer in second chances. If anyone deserves one, it’s you.”

Shoulders trembling just slightly, Molly leaned closer, pulling Caleb’s hand in so they would meet in the middle in an awkward embrace. It was messy and clunky, and he accidentally knocked his horns into Caleb’s ear, apologizing and laughing in a snort that turned itself into a sob.

But Caleb just laughed softly, a deep rumbling sound in his chest, and wrapped his arms around Molly, pulling him closer. “Is this what you wanted?”

His breath washed over Molly’s neck, the only place Caleb could rest his head without facing the wrath of the horns. Molly could do nothing but nod, not trusting his voice.

He wasn’t sure how long they stayed tangled, sitting on the top of the blankets. Caleb rubbed small circles on his back as Molly calmed his breathing and tried to wrap his mind around the fact that Caleb didn’t seem to care.

When there was a knock on the door, Molly just about jumped out of his skin. He jerked back from Caleb, getting one of the chains from his horns caught in the auburn curls.

Caleb swore in Zemnian, pulling Molly closer to him again. “I guess we’re stuck like this. We might starve to death.”

“Sorry, sorry,” Molly said, still grinning. Somehow the tension had cracked, and despite the tears still flowing down his face he couldn’t stop giggling. There was another knock on the door, to which Molly hollered, “COMING!”

That made Caleb swear again, and sent Molly into another fit of giggles as he saw the tender look on Caleb’s face. “You’re quite the handful, Mollymauk Tealeaf.”

“You’ve got nice big hands, Caleb Widogast,” Molly smirked, still feeling more like himself than he had all evening though tears still streamed freely down his cheeks. Caleb’s face lit up red at that. “And a beautiful blush.”

Molly sat up more, grabbing his money and looking at the door. “I… Would you mind? I should clean up or something.” He handed the pouch to Caleb as the man nodded and took it from him. “Give him a good tip for waiting too.”

“Ja, of course.” The blush was still dusted over Caleb’s cheeks as the wizard handed him a box of tissues. Molly’s heart did a somersault in his chest.

Molly was fucked. And not in the good way.


	17. Xhorhasian Takeout, Sharknado, and The Great Marquesian Baking Show

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some well deserved fluff!!! 
> 
> This chapter is mostly just cuddling, but there are some mentions of self harm, just in terms of Molly’s scars (and Yasha going to the fighting pits to get beat up, but that’s cannon…)

### Chapter 17: Xhorhasian Takeout, Sharknado, and The Great Marquesian Baking Show

Caleb juggled the bag of takeout and the two strange drinks the man had passed him. They smelled faintly spiced, and were warm even through their insulated linings. “Danke, have a nice night.”

He’d thrown in a gold piece of his own for the tip. Caleb knew exactly how long it took Molly to untangle the chain from his hair so he could answer the door, and it wasn’t a reasonable amount of time. “Where do you want to eat all this?”

“The bed is fine, as long as we’re careful.”

They curled back up on the bed while Molly set up some awful horror movie Caleb had never heard of on his laptop. Somehow the sharks were in a tornado? After a few questions about the plot Caleb just gave up on trying to understand it and just enjoyed his food. The Xhorhasian takeout food was better than the place he and Beau frequented uptown. The strange spiced drink was some kind of tea with milk, warm and soothing.

The food was delicious and gone within minutes, and Caleb could not help but to remember the last time they’d watched a movie together. Sitting in the dark, watching _Tusk Love_ he had been so exhausted that he’d fallen asleep on Molly’s shoulder. 

And now the tables had turned, the roles had been completely switched. Today he got to comfort Molly, and Molly was the one who looked exhausted enough to fall asleep where they rested.

But it didn’t appear that Mollymauk wanted to sleep. He pulled out his phone, Caleb watching him out of the corner of his eyes, still fascinated with whether or not this was a CGI scene or a bunch of footage of people polymorphed into sharks with a Fly spell cast on them.

“I saw a video earlier and thought of you, I mean just because it was magic. I think it’s a warlock not a wizard, but still, look at this,” Molly scooched closer, wrapping an arm around Caleb casually to pull him into a good position to view the tiny phone screen. Caleb felt a small twinge of happiness when Molly said he was reminded of Caleb when he saw the video. It was strange to think about Mollymauk thinking of Caleb when he wasn’t around. It made the same warm feeling creep up in his chest as when Molly had given him the CDs in Infernal.

Caleb wrapped one hand around the other side of the phone, partially to steady it, and partially to bring it a little closer. Not at all to feel Molly’s fingers gently brush against his own. “Is he summoning…?”

“Yeah, this kid summoned a fucking Balgura for a stupid TikTok,” Molly confirmed over a snort; Caleb wasn’t just seeing things.

Not bothering to ask what TikTok was (he had asked Nott at one point and was just told it was a replacement for some kind of vine, which made no sense, and Caduceus, the botanical expert, had no idea either), Caleb just made a confused grunt, then apologized as he accidentally pressed something on Molly’s phone, “Sheiße, sorry.”

Molly just shrugged as some other app popped up and showed off a bunch of different pictures of him in different places. “No worries. Just opened Instagram.”

Caleb squinted down at the grid of images of Mollymauk. “Is that the park we went to?”

“Yeah!” Molly grinned, tapping the photo and showing off the duck pond they had stopped at a few weeks earlier to practice nature words in Infernal.

Caleb bit his lip, thinking for a moment, and then said in Infernal, _“Feeding the ducks was fun.”_

Molly was positively beaming, but he said something in Infernal so quickly that Caleb almost missed the whole thing.

“Wait, slow down, I got ‘you are’ and ‘your,’ but you’re going too fast.”

The purple tiefling’s tail flicked behind them and he repeated the phrase more slowly. Caleb understood more this time. Tentatively he tried to translate in Common, “You are… something. And something about past tense, and then something of mine.” Caleb was frowning, missing too many words.

“You’re amazing. With past tense and in general, even if your accent is still kind of terrible,” Molly finally said, smirking at him but with a gentle pride in his eyes. “And to be perfectly honest, compared with how you were in the beginning, this accent is much better.”

Caleb nodded, trying to commit the new words to memory by mumbling them to himself under his breath as he looked back at the pictures on Molly’s phone. “I’ve been listening to those CDs you gave me. They’re nice to sleep to.”

Curling closer so Caleb could see better, Molly started scrolling through the old pictures. “I’m glad you like them. They have a few other albums if you want to borrow them when you leave.” He pointed over to a stack of CDs on the desk.

“I’d like that. Is that one of your tattoos?” Caleb asked, pointing to an image on the phone. It was of Molly’s chest, and it looked like it was taken right in the tattoo studio. The peacock on his face curled down over his arm and chest, turning into the twining vines and flowers around the snake on his hand.

Molly hummed in agreement and zoomed in so he could see the intricate details. “Hurt like a motherfucker, but I love it.”

A frown crossed Caleb’s face. Those marks along Molly’s chest, thin and straight, looked far too familiar.

“Mollymauk?” he asked, voice soft. He had said as much earlier, but he wanted to make sure his point was clear.

He hummed again, scrolling past pictures of him smiling with Yasha, tarot cards, crystals, more tattoos, blurring so much that they just became a whirl of color.

“You know I meant what I said earlier, about you being able to come to me if you are in… in a bad place, or in pain? I don’t want you to… I know it’s not my place…” Caleb trailed off, unused to self harm in this way. 

Molly tipped up Caleb’s chin gently with one hand, confusion across his face. “Not your place to what? What’s wrong?”

“Your, ah, chest,” Caleb mumbled, unable to meet his eyes. “I assume it is like… like when Yasha goes to the fighting pits.” He couldn’t say it out loud. Hopefully Molly would understand. “I would always be… be there for you, if you feel like you need to do that.”

Realization spread across Molly’s features, and then horror, “Oh, gods, Caleb, no. It’s not like that. Fuck. I, it’s just, wait, I can show you.”

He scrolled up to a video on the phone, pulling it up and letting it play. The band at the Lavish Chateau played in the background, only this time Molly wasn’t singing. He was throwing two scimitars high in the air, juggling them deftly until one gently grazed across his chest. It was just a knick, but it drew a thin droplet of blood. Caleb almost asked if it was a mistake when the sword was consumed in a blinding white light. Moments later the second sword followed suit, nicking the skin and becoming covered in ice crystals. 

Caleb pulled the phone closer. Worry was quickly falling away in favor of fascination. “This is… some kind of blood magic, ja?” He was well aware of the many types of enchanted swords in the world, mostly used when traveling in the more dangerous parts of Exandria, but some people still wore them as a status symbol in cities. Yasha occasionally carried a great sword, but that was more useful when she was acting as a bouncer. This… this was something else. Caleb had never seen blood magic. Not outside of a textbook diagram.

“As far as I can tell. I’m not the most magical person, but I can manage that. It’s handy in a fight, not that there are many things to fight here in the city. But it makes quite an impressive show. I saw you catch the beginning of the show once with Jester; I just assumed she told you what my act was like. I know it’s not for everyone. They don't actually hurt. Just a little sting.” Molly closed the video, scrolling aimlessly through his feed once again. “But thank you for the sentiment. You’re very sweet.”

“The sentiment remains true,” Caleb said, knowing how much reassurance it took himself in the beginning to trust that his friends really did care for him enough to see him in those moments.

Molly fell silent for a while, just going back over old photographs in the app. After a pause, and over the scream of someone getting devoured by sharks, he asked, “Don’t suppose you have an Instagram?”

“Nein. I believe Nott might,” Caleb said, holding his hand out for the phone. Carefully in the search bar he typed in “nottthebrave,” before finding the right thing and handing it back.

The brush of Molly’s fingers across his own again brought back the light flush to his cheeks. Molly carefully looked at the many pictures Nott has posted. Most of them were of her family, Yeza and Luc looking properly adorable, as always. But more of them, Caleb realized, had his figure featured in the tiny squares. He never noticed her taking pictures, but he figured if anyone would be good at sneaking them, it would be her.

“These are cute,” Molly mumbled, a soft smile on his lips.

“I didn’t know she took these,” Caleb said, eyes widening as they stretched back further and further in time. He saw himself in their old apartment, surrounded by Nott’s knickknacks. There were their old movie nights, and the times she dragged him out to bars, and the further they went back the more it was just the two of them.

Then Molly got to the ones before he and Nott made it to Nicodranas. Caleb’s heart leapt into his throat at the old images of the little goblin and him. He remembered vividly when Nott had lifted the fancy smartphone off of the snooty woman who had spat at Caleb’s feet when he asked her for a spare copper or silver. Caleb had been proud of them when they disguised themselves as a wealthy man and his daughter who had locked herself out of the phone. The people at the store were easy to convince to do a factory reset so the woman couldn’t track it, and even set it up without a data plan as a “punishment” for his “daughter.” It was the first time Nott had successfully disguised herself with magic. Nott then dragged them into internet cafés so she could use the damned thing, insisting it was good for both of them to get used to having their picture taken.

Caleb knew there was no way Ikithon would ever look for him on the social media page of a goblin in Nicodranas, so he wasn’t quite worried about that, though he never would have allowed it at the time. Still, the old pictures brought up strange memories. Memories of Nott trying to boost his self esteem even before she knew how broken he was.

The little porcelain mask and bandages Nott used to use to hide herself. The lighthearted captions about various cons they had been able to pull off. The dirt that clung to them both. Caleb’s old coat that hid too many exposed ribs. The panic that hid behind Caleb’s eyes every moment they were in the Empire.

An orange cat that Caleb had cradled in his arms as they rested in an alleyway.

And then Caleb was crying.

“Your hair was so long,” Molly murmured, captivated by the pictures but glancing over then. “Caleb? Hey, what’s wrong?”

“Ah, it’s silly.” He shook his head, wiping the tears away quickly. “I haven’t thought about Frumpkin in a long time.”

Molly looked back at the pictures then him. “The cat?”

“He… He was my familiar. When I lost my spellbook I could no longer summon him. Not that I had the money anyway. It’s silly. He was just a cat.”

It didn’t feel silly. That had been how he had dismissed these thoughts over the years, the pangs of guilt he still felt when he had no money for incense or the fancy paper necessary to copy over the find familiar spell into his new spellbook. He had resolved to just never let the cat get hurt.

He could still see the Crownsguard who had kicked Frumpkin clearly in his mind. Nott had had to drag him away from the gates in Zadash before he could set the man on fire and get them thrown back in jail.

The lump in his throat wouldn’t go down.

Molly pulled him closer, hugging Caleb into his chest. “He clearly wasn’t just a cat. He was important to you.”

It was all Caleb could do not to sob. This was ridiculous. Molly had experienced a terrible panic attack and flashback today, and yet here he was, crying about a cat who had disappeared almost ten years ago. He apologized softly into Molly’s chest only to be shushed and held tighter. “Remember how you kept telling me I didn’t need to thank you? I’d much rather you just thank me instead of saying you’re sorry a million times.”

Caleb slowly controlled his breathing, finding with surprise that the credits of the movie were already rolling. His internal clock told him that the sun was starting to set, and the night was drawing on.

“Thank you, Mollymauk.”

Molly only nodded, keeping an arm around him even as Caleb untangled himself to wipe his face. The tiefling pulled his laptop closer and put on some baking competition show filmed in Marquet instead of what Caleb was terrified to learn was the second of six shark tornado movies. When asked why they made so many, Molly only laughed, the rumble shaking through his chest.

The warmth of curling up with Molly was unparalleled. Caleb had always enjoyed the moments he and Nott would cuddle up together at night, sleeping on the side of the road. They were moments of quiet care and intimacy in a world that allowed them none of those things.

This was different. Molly was like a furnace, and they slowly shifted lower and lower, no longer sitting up but practically spooning. Caleb’s head rested on Molly’s arm, eyes threatening to close for hours at any moment as the flamboyant human on the baking show introduced the new season’s judge and his co-host.

Molly’s arm was draped over Caleb’s waist to hit “next episode” whenever the credits popped up, and Caleb was pretty sure his tail had wrapped around Caleb’s ankle, just gently. It was the most comfortable Caleb had felt in what might have been decades. Not even his moments with Astrid were like this. A quiet understanding, calm, soft, and warm.

Comparing Molly to Astrid was dangerous, but in his sleep deprived state, Caleb was willing to face that danger.


	18. Don't Go

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fluff! Fluff! Fluff!
> 
> Caleb in a ponytail. Caleb with freckles. Molly is very very not straight.

### Chapter 18: Don’t Go

Molly hadn’t asked Caleb to leave, and he knew that was selfish. But gods damn him, he was _comfortable._ Somehow cuddling with Caleb was better than anything else Molly could think of in that moment. Even Yasha was too muscley to be properly comfortable, though Molly did like being the little spoon.

Still, he couldn’t ask Caleb to stay. He knew he was being selfish, and he knew that Yasha would probably be home soon and wonder why Caleb hadn’t left.

“It’s getting late,” he murmured.

Caleb hummed, shifting softly. “Was?” His accent was thicker, and Molly figured he hadn’t quite heard him. He’d need to pick up some Zemnian if this continued.

“I said, ‘It’s getting late,’” he repeated, ghosting his fingers over Caleb’s sweater clad arm. 

Caleb shifted a bit once more, blinking his eyes. “Ja, it is.” More shifting and shuffling and Molly was about to sigh deeply and pull away when Caleb just got out his phone.

Molly watched with a furrowed brow over Caleb’s shoulder as he pulled up a text conversation with Beau that appeared to be almost entirely a one word exchange. Many of them were just swears. But then Caleb started typing.

>   
>  **Caleb:** I will not be home tonight. Do not assume I have been murdered or tell Nott I am missing.
> 
> **Beauregard:** fucking hell dude  
>  **Beauregard:** dont sleep on the couch in ur study  
>  **Beauregard:** or the couch in the cafe
> 
> **Caleb:** I will not.
> 
> **Beauregard:** or the floor  
>  **Beauregard:** or the street  
>  **Beauregard:** or a jail cell  
>  **Beauregard:** you know you can always ask jester for bail?
> 
> **Caleb:** You cannot text in jail. They take your phone.  
>  **Caleb:** I regret telling you anything about my life. I will see you in the morning.
> 
> **Beauregard:** if u lie to me im telling nott  
>  **Beauregard:** nite  
> 

“Just as charming over text, I see,” Molly mumbled. Caleb only hummed in answer again, the rumbling pleasant and resonant against Molly’s chest.

Molly’s mind was swimming with new information. He would have to go back and study each picture in Nott’s Instagram, and for Caleb’s sake tell her she should switch on private mode. Or archive some of those pictures. The younger Caleb looked perpetually terrified. Not to mention filthy enough that there was little doubt to how rough they’d had it. He was never looking right at the camera, which made sense, but still didn’t detract from the panic that was in his eyes in almost every image. Except the one with the cat. The cat that he had lost.

A twinge of guilt twisted in Molly’s stomach as he stopped his brain from jumping to any wild conclusions. He had heard awful things about the Empire, and he was pretty sure you could get arrested just for sleeping on the street. Judging from the lack of any significant housing before the one apartment Nott seemed to share with Caleb in Nicodranas, they had done just that. But this wasn’t exactly his information to know. Caleb hadn’t known Nott took those pictures, hadn’t meant to show them to him.

He couldn’t further invade the privacy of this man who had been so kind to him.

Molly didn’t have to ask him to stay. He had even given Caleb an out, started the conversation that classically meant kicking someone out of his house. He hadn’t wanted Caleb to leave, so Caleb stayed.

He could get used to that.

“As ridiculously comfortable as you are, dear, I think I’m going to change into sweats. Do you want to borrow some? I think we have a spare toothbrush in the hall closet too.” Molly suddenly felt the overwhelming need to be the most hospitable host there ever was. Maybe, just maybe, if he played this just right, they could make a habit out of this.

Just two friends, spooning in a bed watching _The Great Marquesian Baking Show._ Nothing more to it. Not even as Caleb looked backwards at him, craning his neck with a light blush on his cheeks. “Ja, that would be nice. Thank you.”

Molly was fully unprepared to push open the slightly ajar bathroom door and see Caleb with his hair completely mussed up, brushing his teeth methodically, and wearing an oversized tee shirt of Yasha’s and a pair of Molly’s purple moon and sun sweatpants. Caleb gave a little half wave, continuing to brush his teeth but moving to one side so that Molly could join him. It was adorable. It was soft. It was ridiculously domestic.

And Caleb looked quite good in purple.

Molly pulled his shirt off and threw it into the hamper, his skinny jeans slung over his arm already. His own sweatpants were a ridiculous pattern of purple and red, a batik type print with elephants and swirling designs. He moved beside Caleb and started taking off all his jewelry, placing it on a little dish next to the sink before grabbing his own toothbrush.

Caleb passed him the toothpaste, a beautiful pink flush dusting his cheeks again as he not so discreetly looked at Molly’s tattoos in the mirror. They were definitely eye catching. That was the whole point. Molly hadn’t told him about the eyes yet, but that could wait. He’d bared his soul enough tonight.

They finished up and Molly teetered in the door frame of the bathroom for a moment, wondering if he should offer to set up the pullout couch for Caleb. It might be polite, as much as he didn’t want to. As much as he would miss the smell of old books on his pillows tomorrow night as he tried to sleep without the wizard there.

But Caleb had already ducked back into Molly’s room, so tired his eyes were half lidded.

“Should we sleep on different layers?” Caleb asked softly, looking at the many blankets Molly had. No couch necessary.

“The sheets are the softest,” Molly said, adding quickly, “if you don’t mind. I can sleep on top if it bothers you. Or put a shirt back on.”

“I don’t think anything could bother me right now,” Caleb said with a yawn. “Well, unless they replace Sherri with some other host next season. I like her more than Gilmore.”

Molly snorted, pulling back the covers and setting the laptop against the wall so it couldn’t get knocked off the bed in the night. He might be doing pretty well at the Lavish Chateau, but he wasn’t smart enough with money to be able to replace it right away. 

His breath caught in his throat as he saw Caleb pulling his hair back into a loose ponytail. That was unfairly attractive.

Soon they were back in the same position as earlier, but swaddled with blankets and in softer clothes. And Molly was keenly aware that Caleb didn’t mind his preference to sleep with his shirt off. And how there was now only one thin layer of cloth between the two of them.

With the lights off, but the string lights left on just in case Caleb needed to see to use the bathroom (he had heard Yasha stub her toe often enough to remember humans didn’t have dark vision), the room was cast in a soft golden glow. Caleb’s hair looked soft as silk in the gold, and Molly tried to commit the moment to memory.

Wrapped around the wizard, exhaustion took him. They didn’t even finish the episode before they were both gone to the world.

Molly didn’t often dream. When he did it was hazy images that were hard to decipher. Sometimes it was like his tarot readings, bright and full of meanings he couldn’t quite grasp. Lately they held vague images of the books Caleb was loaning him.

But after being triggered like that, Molly always dreamt of dirt. Always, always, it was inescapable, unavoidable.

Still, Molly was hoping it would be different this time. Never had he gotten so calm again so quickly. Though the thoughts still lingered in the back of his head, they were quieter, less sharp around the edges. He knew he was safe. He was holding a man who could probably dig them out in a second, or make it so he could breathe under the earth, or change all the dirt into marshmallows. Well, Molly never claimed to know how magic worked, but his point was solid.

At the very least, Molly hoped Caleb was a heavy sleeper.

He woke up, choking on dirt, coughing and spluttering. The panic gripped him, and he started to spiral. He could feel the grave dirt under his pointed nails. The stinging scratches from clawing his way free, but he couldn’t get far enough. He couldn’t breathe.

But then there was an arm around his heaving shoulders, a pale hand holding his own shaking fingers, a quiet voice in his ear. It took a moment to register the words. 

Infernal. 

Counting. 

Breathing. The voice was helping him breathe.

The accent was terrible.

His coughing subsided. He could breathe. After a few shuddering breaths, it slowed, and the voice shifted.

“Mollymauk, are you with me?” Caleb’s quiet voice filled his mind. Molly turned, face to face with the man. The twinkling dim light of the string lights in his room still illuminated his hair in a shining red halo. For the first time he was face to face with Caleb in the small ponytail. A few auburn strands had escaped their hold, framing his cheekbones. This close, he saw a tiny speckling of freckles across the pale nose.

He couldn’t speak, not yet. Not with the memory of grave dirt in his mouth. He nodded slowly.

“Now, I’m not leaving. I’m going to keep holding your hand, but I need to grab my coat at the end of the bed.”

Molly wanted to tell him not to let go. To keep holding his shoulders. That if he let go he might float away. But he couldn’t speak yet.

The warm pressure left his shoulders, but in turn the hand in his hands squeezed gently. He held it tightly, trying to memorize its warmth. Trying not to sink back into the earth.

There was a soft rattling sound and then the arm around his shoulders was back. There was something being pressed into his hands. “Can you put one in your mouth?”

What on Earth did that mean? He looked down and saw the lemon candy, finally realizing what was going on. The grounding. Caleb’s soft voice, his hair illuminated in the light of the bedroom, the feeling of his arm around his shoulder. His hand shook but he managed to put the little yellow thing in his mouth.

The sour instantly overtook his senses.

Only sour. No dirt.

“Sorry, I had to get up a moment. It seemed like they helped mostly last time though, so I wanted to make sure you had them.” His voice was still calm, soft, soothing.

“Thank you,” Molly said, voice haggard and shaking.

He wasn’t expecting the soft smile that spread across Caleb’s face. It wasn’t the beaming smile of pure joy Molly longed to recreate, but it was a gentle one, just for him. “It’s good to hear your voice.”

“You’re too good at this.”

“Ah, practice makes perfect, as they say.” Caleb shifted awkwardly, eyes darting away.

“I’ll repay the favor at some point,” Molly said, leaning back so they were both lying down again.

There was some awkward shuffling to get comfortable until they paused. Caleb’s arm had fallen over Molly’s waist and they were staring face to face. Caleb’s nose couldn’t have been more than a few inches from Molly’s.

Fleetingly, Molly wondered what it would be like to close the gap, what Caleb tasted like. Probably something different than dirt. It would probably break him out of whatever flashback or panic he found himself in. A light sprinkle of Caleb’s freckles caught his eye again.

“Do you think you’ll be able to fall back asleep?” Caleb asked softly, interrupting Molly counting the freckles on his nose.

“Once my heart stops pounding,” he murmured, though that wouldn’t stop any time soon with Caleb looking at him like that.

But Caleb only nodded, applying light pressure with his arm. “Does this help?”

“Yes,” Molly said, partly because the light presence of the arm was grounding, and partly because he never wanted Caleb to let go.


	19. A Second Pillow

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Caleb begins to wonder if he could enjoy nice things
> 
> baby steps

### Chapter 19: A Second Pillow

Caleb’s phone was loud.

It was never this loud, not unless it was Yussa or Nott. Yussa almost never used his phone, but on the off chance he did, Caleb had given it the most jarring ringtone on his phone to make sure he always heard it. Nott’s had the same, in case she had an emergency.

Fumbling for the thing blindly, Caleb wiped the sleep from his eyes.

“Hallo, wer ist das?” he mumbled, really hoping it wasn’t Yussa, inexplicably out of sending spells. At least the man knew some Zemnian.

“Caleb, thank god you’re not dead!” Nott’s shrill voice made him groan. He hadn’t been woken by it in months. “Where are you?” she demanded.

He blinked, disoriented. He wasn’t in his apartment. His bed was nowhere near this soft. “I don’t know. Why are you calling?”

On the other side of the phone she screeched, “He’s been kidnapped!” to someone he couldn’t see, only making him groan more. He thought he could hear Jester trying to calm her down, but given that his eardrum might never recover, he couldn’t be sure.

“Nein, nein, Nott. Mir geht’s gut. I’m fine,” he mumbled, sitting upright and taking in the surroundings. Color assaulted him from every angle, tapestries, knicknacks, and trinkets covering every possible bare surface. The string lights still glowed softly, but now sunlight streamed through the apartment window casting rainbows through the crystals hanging there. 

Right. Mollymauk’s bedroom.

“What do you mean you’re fine? Where are you? I thought you would be at the shop when Beau said you didn’t come home last night or this morning.”

Caleb rubbed his eyes again, looking around. He was still wearing Yasha’s tee shirt and Molly’s sweatpants, lying in Molly’s bed. Molly was no longer beside him. He didn’t want to tell Nott about Molly’s episode the day before though. Especially when his internal clock told him it was much later than he usually slept in. Nott would get strange ideas. Ideas she would share with Jester. “I’m at Yasha’s. I stayed the night.”

“Oh,” she said, and he could practically see her hackles going down.

“I’m alive, I’m safe, and I’ll probably stop by the café this afternoon, okay?” he said, slipping off the bed and moving into the bathroom. He could hear voices in the living room, but he needed to brush his teeth.

Completely pacified, Nott said, “Oh, don’t do that, Caleb, it’s your day off! Go have fun!”

“Research is fun, Nott. I’ll see you soon.”

“Bye, Caleb,” she said, significantly more calm and beginning to explain to Jester that Caleb hadn’t been kidnapped.

He hung up and got the taste of sleep out of his mouth with the toothbrush Molly had given him. That helped him feel more awake, but his hair refused to look like anything but a haystack. Idly he wondered if one of the many little tubs and bottles Molly had lined up on the side of the bathroom sink would help with his predicament. With a deep sigh he gave up and pulled the stubborn locks back again into their ponytail. Caleb would need to shower when he got home, but first he wanted to check up on Molly.

Caleb was a very light sleeper. That came with living on the street, and nightmares, and lots of other things he’d experienced in his life. Molly had cried out once or twice in his sleep, but nothing like the first time, and he was easy to console afterwards.

Still, he wanted to make sure Molly wasn’t in a flashback in the living room or something. It was rare that someone woke up in a room without waking up Caleb. He must have been out cold.

Caleb didn’t know exactly how many times he had wandered off during a flashback, but it wasn’t uncommon. If he went back he could probably count them all, but the number might worry him. Best to leave that in the dark.

Soft conversation flowed over him instead, Yasha’s calm voice relaxing any residual concerns Caleb had for Molly’s wellbeing. She sounded similar when comforting someone, but she was quite calm now.

“Guten Morgen,” he said softly, giving her a little wave to announce his presence.

Yasha’s brusque nod was something Caleb expected. The beaming smile on Mollymauk’s face was not. His heart leapt right up into his throat and he desperately tried to calm the flush in his cheeks.

“Sleep well?” Molly asked, pulling out a stool for Caleb to sit at the counter separating the kitchenette from the living room.

He nodded, “Quite well, actually.”

Caleb hadn’t realized how awkward this would be with Yasha here. 

Especially when not two minutes into their conversation of small talk she said outright, “Caleb, I would like to speak with you.” She then looked at Mollymauk. “Alone.”

She then walked off to her bedroom purposefully. Caleb felt a tug in his chest and he very much just wanted to run away. He didn’t want to talk about what this had turned into.

What he had with Mollymauk was nebulous and unsure, floating in the periphery of his mind more often than he’d like to admit. The weeks they’d spent in each other’s company were beyond lovely. But Caleb couldn’t name it because whatever it was, he didn’t deserve it in the first place.

He looked to Mollymauk, sitting on the stool with an almost similarly panicked look. Before Caleb could follow his hand was caught, encircled by Molly’s tail. “Caleb,” Molly said softly, “I know I asked you not to tell her, but I didn’t know what she’d think otherwise. I told her most of it. Just… don’t let her worry about me okay?”

Caleb sighed softly.

Molly didn’t want this misunderstanding any more than he did. Though that twisted his stomach in an unfamiliar, almost painful way, it was also a relief. “I… thank you, Mollymauk. That should make this a little easier.”

He slipped into Yasha’s bedroom and closed the door behind him. She was seated on her bedspread and pointed to her desk chair. “Sit.”

“What did Molly tell you?” he asked, sitting in the black plush chair and taking in the black and white minimalism in contrast to the rest of the apartment that just screamed… Molly.

“He had a flashback. You teleported him to Yussa’s tower, and then brought him back here. You ate food, and slept together in his bed.” Her tone was deadpan, but her eyes were searching. She could be observant when she wanted to. When she knew people.

Caleb sighed softly. She certainly knew him too well. “What do you want to know?”

“Is that all that happened?”

“Do you really think Mollymauk could manage to lie about that?”

She frowned, shaking her head. “You told me, weeks ago, that you did not think you wanted to date anyone. And Molly… I’m not sure I’ve seen him like this before.”

“Has he never had a flashback like this?” Caleb asked, suddenly worried.

“Not the flashback. You.”

Caleb frowned deeper. “I don’t understand.”

“He cares for you. Deeply. I told you that you were his type. And you are leading him on. Whether you mean to or not.” Her face and tone betrayed no emotion, but she was clearly concerned. This wasn’t right, and Caleb knew it.

His lip almost trembled at the thought, but he kept just as stony faced as Yasha. “We are friends. I saw myself in him yesterday, and I helped him in the ways he asked me to. Would you rather I left him there?”

“I know that spell costs 50 gold. You’ve complained about it before. And I know you don’t normally care about people like this, not this quickly. You are my dearest friends and I do not want either of you hurt.”

He swallowed, but it did nothing for the dry lump in his throat. “I don’t deserve what he has given me. I can’t accept more, even if he would be willing to give it.”

“That’s bullshit, Caleb,” Yasha said, voice soft as ever. “And you know it.”

“No, I don’t.” He could try and convince himself, but that would take time. It would take too long.

“Well, figure it out soon. Or you’ll end up hurting him. And I will snap you like a twig then have Jester put you back together.”

He looked up at her, eyes pleading. Obviously there was very little to hide any more. “You know I… I don’t know how to people very well. I know this is selfish of me. Should I just leave? Not be friends anymore? It’s too late for me, Yasha, you know that.”

“I am still not much better,” she said, her expression softening ever so slightly. “But… being with Beau is very nice. I still think about Zuala every day. I think about what I’ve done every day. And it’s still nice with Beau.”

Caleb frowned a bit. “So you are indeed fucking my roommate?”

“You can judge me for that once you realize you want to do the same to mine.”

His face was as red as his hair. “This is not very good advice.”

“I’m not good at giving advice. Go talk to Caduceus.” Yasha shrugged, and he took that as his dismissal. 

Caleb went back into the bathroom and changed into his clothes from the night before. His khakis felt stiff in comparison to the fuzzy pajama pants Molly had given him, but he was comforted by the fact that he was on his way to get a shower. Perhaps he would just do his research in his bed today. 

Perhaps he would buy a second pillow.

Not for any visitors, he told himself, but because it had been kind of nice sleeping in Molly’s pile of richly colored pillows. And his plush sheets that probably weren’t purchased from the clearance bin at the surplus store. And what had to have been a foam mattress topper that was so luxurious it was sinful.

Perhaps, if Caleb couldn’t allow himself the luxury of thinking about Molly like Yasha said, he could take a step towards allowing himself some other small luxuries.

Last night he’d slept through the night without a single scare. He woke occasionally to help Molly, sure, but it was far better than waking up in a cold sweat, gasping and tasting ash. The stack of CDs now resting beside his coat in Molly’s bedroom were testament to Molly being able to help him get a full night’s sleep. Translating the music into Infernal before he slept was the best exercise he’d found to clear his mind and focus on the mundane yet.

Making up his mind he pulled out his phone and sent a few texts. Molly was still sitting in the living room, looking a little deflated when he saw Caleb bundled up in his coat and about to leave. “Did she really scare you away?”

“I needed to be going regardless. I have research and some errands to run.” Caleb wrapped his scarf around his throat a few times. “But if it makes you feel better, I think she’s more mad at me than she is worried about you.”

“Mad at you?” Molly frowned, standing from the stool.

Caleb looked at the tiefling, remembered how it had felt to wrap his arms around him. “It’s hard to explain. But you’re in the clear for now, at least.”

Molly nodded, stepping forward and then faltering. “Are we… Are we the kind of friends who hug now?” he asked softly, looking like the wrong answer might make him plaster on some brittle happy face and make a raunchy joke.

Fuck it.

He was going to hell anyways. “If you’d like to be.”

Tension melted away from the tiefling’s shoulders. “I would like that.” And then he was swept up in a hug. It felt like Molly was trying to push all of his gratitude into the one embrace that he could fit.

“I will see you next week, Mollymauk,” Caleb said, clearing his throat and trying to hide the blush in his cheeks.

“Bye, Caleb.”

Caduceus was free and happy to accompany Caleb shopping when he decided to go out hours later. He had told Nott of his plans, letting her believe she convinced him to take an honest to goodness day off. As if he had done that in decades.

“Caduceus,” Caleb asked, finally building up to ask the firbolg what he’d actually called him out here for. As much as he enjoyed the calming presence and advice on things he’d never purchased before, that wasn’t what he really needed advice for. Still, the gentle giant had been patient, letting him chicken out repeatedly and ask between two types of bedding instead. “Do you sleep on feather pillows or foam?”

“I like the natural, but it’s all a matter of personal preference. And how much support you like. Did you touch both kinds?” Caduceus moved over to the display, making Caleb squeeze each one. It was an oddly grounding motion, like a stress ball or some other fidget.

He hadn’t known that this much variety in bedding existed, and was feeling less silly by the minute for asking Caduceus to come with him. After deciding on the foam that boasted it could alleviate back pain, they moved on to the kitchen supplies.

It was easier to think about asking Caduceus questions when he was reading all the differences between two different (identical in all but color to Caleb’s eye) vegetable peelers. It was only a little distracting that he was talking about a recent local uptick in undead activity while he did so. Caleb hummed in acknowledgement, still just trying to find the right words.

“Do the others ever ask you for relationship advice?” he finally asked, unsure how else to broach the topic.

Caduceus didn’t even look up. He knew that eye contact didn’t help Caleb’s boldness. “Not often. Jester kind of talks at me about Fjord, but I suspect that’s because he’s my roommate and she does that to everyone. I’m not terribly interested in those sorts of things.”

“Ja,” Caleb mumbled. He ran a hand over the comforter he planned to purchase and wondered idly if he should put it back, along with the new pillows and sheets, walk away from the store with an apology to Caduceus. He didn’t deserve their comfort. If anything it might keep him from sleeping if his bed was this comfortable to read in.

But they were soft. They were soft like Molly’s hand was soft around his and he didn’t want to put them back.

He wanted to take small steps towards allowing himself to be happy. 

“I don’t suppose you have general relationship advice that’s good for everything and everyone?” he mumbled, unsure how to proceed from this point.

Caduceus looked at Caleb carefully, making eye contact for far too long. Even when Caleb’s eyes darted away to the pile of bedding in his shopping cart, he could feel the firbolg staring at him. “You deserve happiness, Caleb. You’re a good man.”

“You do not think… think that I have too much baggage?” he asked softly, having heard Jester use the phrase on occasion, especially about characters that were left behind in favor of well endowed mystery men in her romance novels. “That I would cause more pain than enjoyment?”

“Well, that’s up to your partner. But I bet you have good taste, Mr. Caleb. What do you think? Do you think you could cause more pleasure than pain if you tried?” Caduceus asked.

Caleb wondered idly if Caduceus fully understood the many different meanings of what he was saying.

“I do not know.”

“Do you think it would be worth it to try?”

Caleb looked back at the pillows, thinking about allowing some softness into his life. “Perhaps.”


	20. Ladies Night

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ladies night for all the femmes of the M9!

### Chapter 20: Ladies Night

Molly hadn’t been able to stop thinking about Caleb, fast asleep in his bed, hair messed up out of his ponytail and around his pillow in a halo of red orange flames. Caleb who now agreed to be the type of friends who hugged. Caleb who had woken up with him for every little moment of panic throughout the night and grounded him like it was the simplest thing in the world. Caleb who had left the tin of lemon candies on Molly’s pillow. Even as Molly sat on the stool at work, Caleb, and the image of him sleeping, were the only things on his mind. Especially since it was a much nicer image than blindness and the taste of dirt in his mouth, and much brighter than the gloomy rainy day outside.

But thankfully Desmond was back in town and had brought with him piles and piles of inventory. And had taken with him the stern eye of Gustav, out to some new restaurant. Not the underground one. Molly had to double check, even if he knew there was no way it could be open again so quickly after the earthquake.

So he was set up with plenty of busy work, and actually able to look at his phone for once. Most of what Desmond had found were new semi precious stones, but he’d known from the glint in the man’s eye that there would be treasures to unearth in the inventory. After finding a few sets of new tarot cards, he got very distracted. They were gorgeous, strange art nouveau style portraits, intricate and floral. By the time he finished unpacking and displaying a few of them, he had already put the gold in the register to set one set aside for himself. 

Then he found the enchanted scimitar. Inlaid with shining jewels and golden in color, Molly’s heart leapt into his throat when he saw it. The fact that it was thrumming with magical energy was the cherry on top.

He rummaged through the box, desperate to find the price. When he saw the number of zeros his heart dropped. Well. Maybe he could bat his eyelashes at Desmond and Gustav and beg for a discount for Winter’s Crest. Especially since the little card said the goddamn thing could help you teleport once a day. That would be the best act the Lavish Chateau had ever seen. Well, besides Marion. No one could top the Ruby of the Sea.

Halfway through the day he received a picture from Caleb that took forever to load and the simple text:

>   
>  **Caleb:** You have successfully convinced me.  
> 

The picture loaded after about two minutes of a stagnated little whirling circle, along with another text.

>   
>  **Caleb:** I have purchased not one, but two additional pillows.  
> 

The picture was a little blurry, but showed Caleb’s bed with, indeed three pillows, one new full sized one, a fluffy blue square one, and what appeared to be new sheets and a new comforter as well. There wasn’t a pattern in sight, but they were blue instead of gray. Improvement to be sure.

And clearly Caleb had been thinking about his time spent in Molly’s bed too, though not for the reasons Molly had. Molly could work with that.

>   
>  **Molly:** Pray tell is that a decorative throw pillow????
> 
> **Caleb:** It might be.
> 
> **Molly:** :O  
>  **Molly:** Who are you and what have you done with my friend Caleb??????  
> 

Molly slowly devolved from putting away inventory to just sitting on the stool with his phone, legs crossed and a lazy grin on his face. Caleb said he’d slept better in Molly’s bed than he had since he was probably 14 years old, and they were now discussing types of mattress toppers and why the expensive foam ones were worth every penny.

He almost dropped his phone when a tortle woman walked in and asked about a tarot reading. Of course he caught the phone and grinned spectacularly, telling her where to set up while excusing himself from the conversation with Caleb. He knew that he looked the part today, flashing his pointed canines and wrapping his embroidered maroon coat around his middle. It was still a bit chilly, even in the shop.

Part of the way through the session his phone buzzed once in his pocket. And then again. And again. It wasn’t the buzzing of his silent ringtone, so he just left it be and tried to calm the woman down as he pulled the tower out of the deck when she’d asked about her love life.

As much as he hoped it was Caleb bombarding him with texts, he had the sneaking suspicion that he’d been added to a group chat.

After he had reassured the woman that she should probably just break up with her shitty boyfriend before whatever happened to mean pulling the tower (and from what he had heard in their short conversation, it would be no loss) and writing out the name of his favorite vibrator for her on a sticky note, he pulled out his phone.

**11 unread messages.**

>   
>  **Jester:** HELLO EVERYONE!!!  
>  **Jester:** I had an absolutely SHITTY day so Nott and I are having a ladies night!!!!  
>  **Jester:** Face masks and stuff for mani/pedis will be provided ofc!!  
>  **Jester:** WHO’S IN???
> 
> **Unknown sender:** obvi im in  
>  **Unknown sender:** since it was my idea  
> 

That had to be Nott. Molly took a moment to add her number into his phone.

>   
>  **Unknown sender:** fuck no.
> 
> **Yasha:** i will go.
> 
> **Unknown sender:** UGH  
>  **Unknown sender:** FINE
> 
> **Jester:** YAY BEAU!!!!!!!!! :D  
> 

At least Molly was getting everyone’s numbers this way, even though his right ass cheek practically felt numb after all the vibrations. He filled out Beau’s contact while his phone continued to buzz incessantly.

>   
>  **Jester:** Ok, that leaves Molly!!!  
>  **Jester:** MOLLY YOU HAVE TO COME!!!!!!
> 
> **Beau:** fuck no one told me that asshole was invited  
>  **Beau:** r u the unknown #?
> 
> **Molly:** Well I was going to say I’m not quite a lady  
>  **Molly:** At least not today  
>  **Molly:** But I know I’m more of a lady than Beau ever will be
> 
> **Beau:** oh fuck off  
>  **Beau:** actually ur kinda right  
>  **Beau:** but still fuck off
> 
> **Molly:** I get off work at 6
> 
> **Jester:** YESSSSSS  
>  **Jester:** My place at 7 then!! ☆*:.｡.o(≧▽≦)o.｡.:*☆  
> 

Well. At least Molly had plans for the evening now. As his thoughts were occupied by a certain wizard’s now very comfortable looking bed, this would be a welcome distraction. And it had been a while since he had spent hours just luxuriating over himself.

That and his fingernails had gotten a little long. Not that he had been utilizing his fingers in that way these days, but he liked to keep his options open.

To avoid the very dangerous train of thought that led him down, he focused on restocking and how he might get to hear some good gossip. It was a little disappointing that both Beau and Yasha would be there. Molly had barely gotten anything out of Yasha about how their relationship was going, and he would have liked a moment to interrogate Beau. Or time with Yasha and Jester. It was hard to hide things from the blue tiefling.

He could tell that he and Jester would be fantastic friends, and this was a good first step.

In an effort to be slightly better received by those at the party who might have been skeptical about his presence he grabbed a few bottles of decent wine before heading over. Red, white, and rosé so everyone would be happy. Then he remembered Jester grabbing milk at the bar and grabbed a bottle of sparkling apple cider too.

An effort was made. And with the way that Jester squealed when she opened the door and immediately hugged him despite the rain clinging to his coat, he figured it was well enough appreciated.

“Molly! You came!” she was practically bouncing, dragging him into the apartment.

He chuckled, peeling off the soaked jacket, “I said I would, didn’t I?”

“Actually, you just said you got off work at 6:00, not that you were coming, so I’m still glad!” She beamed at him like she had at Caleb the last time Molly had been in her apartment. Molly could see how she might bring a flush to someone’s cheeks. Jester was quite cute.

Maybe Caleb liked tieflings.

Molly shook his head like he was clearing a fog. That was a very dangerous thought.

Jester thanked him for all the drinks, beginning to get out glasses for the folks who were there, which appeared to just be her and Nott. She turned down the news that was playing in the background, leaving the woman on the screen who was finishing talking about a local missing person who had been gone since the previous evening to start talking about the local uptick in undead activity with the captions on. “Red, white, or rosé, Nott?” Jester asked, putting each bottle label out on the counter.

Nott squinted over each one. “Rosé.”

“I’ll take the rosé too,” Molly noted the preference. Good to know. “How was work today?”

Jester rolled her eyes dramatically, “Oh my gods, Molly, there was the _worst_ guy today at the café. He kept hitting on me, but he was saying really really dirty stuff, practically climbing over the counter. I kept telling him I wasn’t interested; I even tried telling him I had a super hot half-orc boyfriend! I mean Fjord and I aren’t actually _together_ together yet, but whatever. But he just wouldn’t leave! Nott was in the back the whole time, so it was just me in the shop.”

“I wish he was still there when I got back. I would’ve killed him,” the goblin grumbled into her rosé.

“He wasn’t there? Did he leave?” Molly asked, suddenly worried for Jester.

A smile twisted across her lips that was one of the most devious things he had ever seen. It made him want to be best friends with her, if that position wasn’t already taken by Yasha. He was filled with the sudden urge to hear every nasty thing Jester had ever done. “Well, the Traveler didn’t like him talking to me like that either. So I banished him.”

“You what?”

“I sent him to the astral sea for a minute. And when he came back he was so scared he had _literally,”_ her eyes flashed with a glint that was almost evil and she leaned forward, _“shit his pants.”_

Molly was wide eyed, but burst into a bout of giggles. “Jester, that is the best fucking thing I have heard all day.”

“Seconded,” Beau said, closing the door behind her after letting herself in. “But you should have punched him in the goddamn face first.”

“I didn’t want to touch him! He was so gross!” Jester’s face screwed up like she had smelled something revolting. “Anyways, what kind of wine do you want Beau?”

“Red. No beer tonight?” she asked, looking over the bottles appreciatively. Molly thrust his fist into the air, internally. Step one in the right direction with the asshole roommate.

Jester filled her a glass, letting her taste it first before telling her, “Molly brought it!” She turned back to Molly, “Beau’s a total wine expert.”

She took a sip and frowned at Molly. “It’s not swill. Ya did good.”

“I’ll take that.” He nodded, sipping his own wine and thanking the Moonweaver that he had bothered to buy the more expensive kind. He wondered idly what kind of wine Caleb preferred. He seemed to like pretty much everything they tried at the wine cellar before it caved in. That wasn’t something he wanted to dwell on, despite yesterday feeling like it happened ten years ago. He popped a lemon candy in his mouth and Nott sent him a knowing, gentle look.

That was a surprise.

Jester then pulled out the most massive collection of nail polish Molly had ever seen, and that was including his own. “Fuck, Jester, you even have the ones just for tieflings!” His eyes grew wide as he saw the entire collection of polishes designed specifically for tiefling pigments and fingernails (which were sometimes more like talons) in mind.

“Yes!” She clapped her hands happily. “I have all their other stuff too: the eye shadows, the liners, the foundation and concealer are to _die_ for, Molly. Tell me you’ve tried them!”

He shook his head, “I always thought they were too expensive to be worth it. Are they that good?”

“They’re amazing! They branched out from the original red and have colors for basically the whole spectrum, so I bet they have the perfect purple! We have to go shopping so you can try some!” Jester was practically vibrating out of her chair with excitement, and Molly was about to be right there with her. Before he had decided if he wanted his nails a deep teal or a pale dusty rose, she had already pulled out her calendar on her phone and made a plan for them to go to all the local makeup stores in Nicodranas.

Yasha showed up at that point, looking just as awkward as ever, but warming slightly when she saw Beau and Molly. It probably helped that there was only polite banter and no one was actually at anyone else’s throat tonight.

Molly gathered that she was a new invite to “ladies night” as well, as she sat stiffly in one of the armchairs and nursed her white wine without even taking a look at the various nail polishes and face masks. Perhaps step two of winning over Caleb’s asshole roommate would be easier than he thought. “Yasha, dear, why don’t you take off the chipped polish you have on now and I can help you with more once you’re done? It’s been weeks since I last did them.” he said, setting down the nail file he’d been using for the past few minutes. Molly sat near her, but not next to her on the couch and broke out the dusty rose polish for his own fingers.

Jester hovered, making sure that Yasha had all the cotton balls and nail polish remover she needed after refilling her wine. Beau was finishing up a coat of deep blue on her toes, sitting awkwardly on a stool to let them dry.

According to plan, Molly was nowhere near finished with his own nails when Yasha threw out the last cotton ball. “I’ll be a bit longer than I thought, Yash. Unless someone else wants to help?”

His eyes flitted over the rest of the group, resting not so subtly on the awkward human for a little longer than necessary before moving over to Jester.

Beau shot up like someone had dropped an ice cube down the back of her shirt. “Uh, yeah, sure, I can… I can do that. What color?”

Yasha was blushing. Yasha was blushing and it was goddamn adorable. Molly wanted to squeal or take a picture, but he couldn’t do either without being an asshole so he just took a sip of his wine and tried to hide his pleased expression.

But she still hadn’t answered the question. Molly could throw her a bone, especially since he had just thrown her under the bus. Or as she would say, off a bridge. “She usually likes bla-”

“Blue,” she said softly, staring right at Beau.

That was new. Molly had trouble hiding his grin then, turning to talk with Jester who had a matching gleam in her eye. They talked about everything under the sun, and it was lazy and calm and utterly wonderful. Eventually they put on _Mamma Mia,_ and then _Mamma Mia 2: Here We Go Again,_ and everyone tried their best to sing along while wearing sheet masks.

It was utterly lovely.

Molly hadn’t had so many friends since there were more people working at Gustav’s. A lot of people had moved on over the years and each one left a hollow in his chest. This was nice. It was familiar.

All too soon, the wine was gone and everyone had their nails done immaculately, except Nott, who opted for just the face mask. Jester helped everyone back into their coats, ever the hostess despite the fact that it looked like it’d stopped raining hours ago.

“Afterparty?” Molly asked as Yasha and Beau stepped out into the cold night air.

“What did you have in mind?” Beau raised a brow.

“Desmond slipped me a baggie of something that I don’t know the name of and told me to have a fun time when he got back into town.” Molly had a lazy grin that only alcohol could bring to his face, but with a tall glass of water and good company, there was no reason for this night to end.

Beau’s eyes widened. “Fuck, dude.”

“I have to get up early tomorrow. I’m leaving for a while.” Yasha shook her head, pulling her hair out from under her coat.

“Aw, where do you _go,_ Yasha?” Beau asked, far too loudly on the sidewalk.

Yasha looked at the two of them like they were children about to get into the cookie jar. “There’s a storm coming. I shouldn’t be longer than a week.”

“But I’ll be lonely, Yash,” Molly pouted.

“Sounds like you’ll have Beau to look after you.” Yasha smiled. “Don’t be loud coming into the apartment later.”

And then she was walking off towards the subway.

“Lead the way, Beau. I’m not allowed to do drugs in my own goddamn house.”


	21. On the Edge of the Desert When the Drugs Began to Take Hold

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> this is where shit kinda hits the fan! don't do drugs kids (or at least be more responsible than Beau and Molly)
> 
> (canon typical violence)

### Chapter 21: On the Edge of the Desert When the Drugs Began to Take Hold

Caleb was exhausted, having lost track of time researching in his office and now stumbling back into his apartment at around two in the morning. Early that morning he had gone to the animal shelter. Nott had volunteered to go with him to the animal shelter, but all of the cats had just made him think of Frumpkin. He had to leave the place before he broke down into tears. Nott understood of course, knowing exactly how they had lost Frumpkin in the first place since she was the one who dragged him away from killing the crownsguard who had kicked him. The visit left him emotionally exhausted, and he felt the urge to curl up with the new pillows and sleep until his shift at the bookstore the next afternoon.

But Yussa was due back soon, probably sometime next week if everything worked out, and Caleb had been working nonstop. He wanted something really impressive to show Yussa and Nott before he brought his research to them to help her change back into a halfling. All he wanted to do after the long day was fall into his now very comfortable bed. But there were voices in the apartment. Voices he recognized.

Molly was talking. “You know what? I just realized I never had a childhood. I’ve never said that out loud.”

Molly was talking with Beau, of all people. She answered, “What happens if you were supposed to have a childhood, but it’s like barely a childhood because it was supposed to be someone else’s childhood, but it was you instead? Is that a childhood?”

“What _happened_ to you?”

“What happened to either of you?” Caleb asked, trying to take in the sight of Molly sitting completely upside down on his couch, grasping at nothing in the air, and Beau lying spread eagle on the floor.

Molly’s face lit up in an absolutely heartbreaking smile, pointed canines catching the light. “Caleb! I was wondering when you’d show up.”

“Caleb, Caleb,” Beau was waving at him frantically, “Do you see the fish?”

“Was?” he mumbled, slipping back into his native tongue. “Are you under the effect of some spell?” He was too tired for this shit, especially when this looked like something Jester specialized in, not him. This was a far cry from the fire in his veins. He pulled off his scarf and hung it up, going to assess the damage.

“Kind of?” she frowned, still grabbing at nothing. “It’s enchanted, right, Molly?”

“Should I call Jester? Or an ambulance?” Caleb crouched by Molly’s head wondering if they’d been poisoned.

Molly laughed, almost manic, “It’s drugs, Caleb, dear. We’re fine. And there’s a massive fish, like right behind you. Really gross looking honestly. Oh, gods, don’t move back, you’re moving right through it, oh gross.”

The tiefling tugged him forward, almost knocking him off balance. “Sheiße, really, Beauregard?” Caleb groaned, looking at Molly’s dazed face.

Molly raised a hand and rubbed it over Caleb’s cheek. “Your pretty red hair is gone,” he murmured, frowning like it was the worst thing he’d ever seen. That was new. 

“Blame Molly! He corrupted me!” she cried out lamely from the floor, interrupting Caleb’s thoughts before they could run wild. Neither of them were thinking straight. He wondered exactly how these drugs felt.

Molly frowned darkly, sitting up and knocking his forehead into Caleb’s with a surprised grunt, “Sorry, dear, but don’t listen to a word she says; she’s the one who’s tried it before.”

“Have you been doing drugs in our apartment a lot, Beauregard?” Caleb looked over at her, rubbing his forehead.

“No! Gods, I haven’t seen this shit since Kamordah!” she groaned. “You’re not my real dad, Caleb!”

“Ja, he’s a fucking asshole,” he grumbled, going to the kitchen.

“Caleb, don’t leave me!” Molly cried out, trying and failing to grab his coat as Caleb left. Instead he fell to the floor, knocking into the coffee table and collapsing into a fit of giggles.

Mollymauk was stoned off his ass in his living room. That was certainly not what he expected. He was so exhausted he barely knew what to think.

Caleb got them both glasses of water, placing one near Beau and sitting up Mollymauk on the floor. “Drink. Both of you.”

They were obedient at least, chugging the water. “Fuck, Caleb, you’re a genius,” Beau said, drinking it too fast.

Molly drank his water and mumbled something about “wanting to” that Caleb chose to blame on the drugs. “Molly, you can crash on the couch tonight. You’re not going home like this.”

The purple tiefling pouted. “Aw, that’s no fun, Caleb. Do you want to try some?”

“Absolutely not.”

Molly frowned at him a moment too long. “Beau!” he cried, standing up. “I feel amazing, thank you for the water, Caleb, but _Beau,_ let’s go for a walk!”

Beau leapt to her feet, grinning from ear to ear. “Yes! I want to see everything!”

“I want to see a graveyard!” Molly grinned right back at her.

“Nein, you are not leaving the apartment like this.” Caleb frowned. This was already out of hand.

“You can’t catch me, Caleb!” Beau hollered, bounding out the front door before he could even try to grab at the back of her shirt.

Molly gave him an apologetic look, “Sorry, dear.” In a rare moment of speed, Caleb caught Molly’s coat sleeve. Molly grinned and kissed him on the cheek, effectively stunning him enough to slip out the door after Beau.

“Verdammt,” he said, rubbing his cheek and bounding out the door after them. Beau was ridiculously fast, and Molly had a head start. Hopefully he could keep them from running in front of a car. A low stream of Zemnian curses and the thought of either of his friends splattered on the pavement kept him from worrying too much about the ache in his lungs.

He was surprised to find that once he got out on the street, the two hadn’t made it too far. They were wandering, still on the sidewalk, confused, and Molly kept asking Beau about a local graveyard.

Caleb could work with that.

“If you two stay where I can keep you out of traffic, I’ll walk you to the nearest graveyard,” he called out, hoping their hearing wasn’t affected by the strange substance they’d consumed.

Molly turned around and beamed at him again. “Caleb, you wonderful human being! Get your ass up here and lead the way!”

He closed the gap, sighing with relief as they two seemed to not want to run away from him again. Beauregard could get rather nasty when she thought Caleb was acting too much like her shitstain of a father. But she was waiting patiently, well, staring blankly at a window of a storefront, and Molly was holding a hand out to Caleb.

“Caleb, Caleb, Caleb, I gotta tell you something,” Beau slung an arm around him before he could reach for Molly’s extended hand. She almost knocked him off balance, but since she was the one he was really worried about wandering into the street away from him, he let it happen.

He looked at her, ignoring the positively crestfallen look from Molly out of the corner of his eye, and started to lead them in the direction of the cemetery. “Ja? What’s so important?”

“First off, Molly’s cooler than I thought. Still an asshole, but whatever. I won’t hate you if you have him around sometimes.” Her breath smelled of something pungent, almost fungal, and quite a bit of wine, and she was being much louder than she thought. This couldn’t be a great combination.

“And second?” he asked, very skeptical of this conversation.

“Second, me and Molly _might_ pass out once this is done. I think in like… forty minutes? Time doesn’t feel real right now. But the passing out part only lasts an hour. So don’t like, worry or something, okay?” Her grin was lazy and her eyes were half lidded. 

He swore under his breath in Zemnian. “I’m never babysitting you like this again. You’re a grown fucking adult and you should be more responsible. Get drunk off your ass like the rest of us.”

She pouted, but kept her arm around his neck, letting him take her to the graveyard. “You look so weird in black and white. Your dark circles look like shit, dude.”

 _“Verpiss dich._ It is 2:17 in the morning and I am babysitting two of my fully grown friends. Yussa is coming back in less than a week and I’m going to ask him about Nott. I have every right to be tired.” Caleb said, deadpan as ever, but starting to feel the weight of the day wear down on him.

Molly moved over then, sounding worried, “You don’t have to stay with us. We can handle some drugs, Caleb. Honestly.”

Caleb frowned at him. Knowing that Molly only had solid memories of four years of his life made him wonder just what he had been doing in all that time. “Nein. I will not leave my friends to pass out in a graveyard in the middle of the night.” Even if he was tired. Even if he had left his scarf at home and was starting to get cold. His friends-- his stupid, idiotic friends--were worth it.

“Molly, the graveyard!” Beau whooped, leaving Caleb and vaulting herself over the fence. At least she wouldn’t be hit by a car in there. 

Molly grinned, rushing in and leaping over the fence, not to be outdone.

Caleb groaned again, slipping in between the bars of the fence. It was a good thing he was skinny and the bars were rather wide. He could hear the two of them not too far, calling something the ugliest thing they had ever seen. He made his way over carefully, not one to disturb the dead if unnecessary. The sacks of bones might have been lifeless, but he’d caused enough death and seen enough of the undead to be careful.

That was a dark thought. He suppressed a shiver and blamed it on the exhaustion.

“Caleb, you totally should have taken some of the Skein; this thing looks _nasty!”_ Beau was grinning, pointing a little further off. “Oh, there’s one behind you too!”

“It’s a smaller one, but yeah,” Molly said, pointing, and then looking worried again. Caleb didn’t like the deep wrinkle in the tiefling’s brow. In his exhausted state he wanted to walk over and smooth it out, like something out of one of Jester’s romance novels.

But he didn’t have long to dwell on that inclination. 

Something cold bloomed in Caleb’s chest and he felt his knees wobble as he sank to the ground, unable to turn around or do much of anything but stare down. Beside him, a few feet away was a corpse, and thrust through his sternum was an ethereal blue hand. Pain seared through his body, cold, numbing and sharp at the same time.

Somewhere in front of him he could hear swearing and yelling, but he was mostly concerned with getting back on his feet. Beau was screaming that she could punch ghosts. That changed his plan. He didn’t have any spells with radiant damage, but if she could really punch ghosts, that would be helpful. Instead of his bat guano and sulfur he went for the licorice root.

Suddenly Beau was moving very quickly, landing a few blows on the creature in front of them. Whatever creature was behind him went to strike again as he turned to try and find cover, but Molly was there, holding what must have been a rusted metal part of the fence now lit up with radiant light. Under any different circumstances, Caleb would have been excited to see the blood magic in action.

But at the moment, the undead creature was reaching back for another strike.

The creature looked hurt but still lashed out at him, and he felt it grab his upper arm. Its ethereal hand sunk into his coat and part of the flesh crumbled away like dust. It was draining, and his left arm felt tingly and was growing numb.

Good thing he could cast with either hand.

His right hand closed around the bat guano and sulfur in his pocket as the creature turned to Molly.

It was undead. It looked nothing like them. Whatever spirit had left that corpse was no longer anything close to human. He could do this. He could do this for Beau and Molly, who might pass out at any moment and be left defenseless.

The headstones around him were of little consequence if Molly was going to get hurt. “Stand away from it, bitte,” he called out, pointing at the creature as Molly stepped back. A circle of hot flame flashed around it, singing away the grass under its feet and sending a blast of warm air through the night. Caleb gulped at the image of a humanoid shadow in the flames.

He had used most of his weaker spells today in translating spells for Yussa. Despite the creature being resistant to flame, the more powerful magic reduced it to ghostly ash with a scream. It wasn’t the right kind of scream, not quite natural enough to break his focus, so Caleb turned around, looking for whatever Beau was dealing with.

It appeared that she hadn’t been hit by the creature as he had, but it was dodging her attacks as she tried to hit the damned thing while stoned off her ass. A macabre dance had ensued, neither of them striking any meaningful blows.

But the ghoulish creature had heard the wailing of its friend, and could see the cause for its demise. Which was unfortunately one very tired wizard. Caleb swallowed, patting around in his coat for his lodestone. The thing was fast, and as Beau swiped out to try and keep its attention it just swept around her and floated straight over to him.

It was like it knew the pain in his chest and on his shoulder, reaching to the spot in between, right over his heart. He could hear yelling again, see Molly’s bright fence post slash at the hissing creature.

The sickening cold feeling filled him again and he felt the sway in his legs as his body threatened to give up on him.

He lifted his hand, ignoring how the loadstone shook in his fingers and mumbled the arcane words, hoping his last spell of the day would work. If not…

Well, at least he wouldn’t be around to worry about that. Hopefully Beau and Molly would be able to run.

There was no time to dwell on that as he finished the movement of his hands to cast disintegrate. The wail in his ears made his eardrums pop as the creature crumbled away to hazy gray dust and disappeared. Caleb swayed on his feet, feeling as though he might fall over at any moment.

“Are either of you going to pass out from the Skein?” he asked softly, vision blurring slightly as Molly and Beau moved to look at him with concern.

Molly shook his head, about to speak before Beau interrupted him, “No, it wore off during the fight. Are you okay though, Caleb? You look like shit. Well, more like shit than before.”

“Ja, mir geht’s gut… I’m fine. I think I might just need to sit down a moment,” he mumbled, vision blurring again as everything went black.


	22. Fuck, fuck, fuck

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jester (the cleric) being unprepared with her healing spells? It's more likely than you'd think... (Too bad Caduceus doesn't live uptown)
> 
> Some depictions of a necrotic injury and some graphic descriptions of it being healed.

### Chapter 22: Fuck, fuck, fuck

Caleb was swaying on his feet, eyes a little unfocused. Molly thought Caleb looked a little like he had the day they’d gone to Yussa’s tower. Vacant, a little lost, but this time completely exhausted on top of all that.

Molly had never seen magic like this before. The huge explosion of fire that had incinerated the spector where it stood, and the strange dark magic that made the larger wraith crumble into dust were some of the most powerful spells Molly had ever seen. Caleb was terrifying when he needed to be. The moment the Skein had worn off Molly’s vision had been consumed with fiery bright orange, the rush of it making the wizard’s hair fly around his head in a strange crown.

Now Caleb just looked, quite frankly, awful. His eyes were struggling to stay open, and the dark circles under his eyes seemed to have gotten worse in just the few minutes of the walk over here and the battle. Molly wanted to ask if he was okay, and when Beau interrupted him to do the same he just wanted to go give Caleb a shoulder to lean on.

“Ja, mir geht’s gut… I’m fine. I think I might just need to sit down a moment,” Caleb mumbled, his knees finally giving out and sinking to the ground.

Molly caught him before he hit his head, letting out a stream of curses in both Common and Infernal. Caleb was completely limp in his arms, breathing, but with a strange black mark crawling up his throat where his scarf should have been. It looked like his veins were turning black…

“Fucking hell,” he pulled aside the coat and Caleb groaned with pain as Molly exposed what looked like dead and rotting skin.

“Shit,” Beau said, eyes wide, “shit, shit, shit. I… I’m gonna call Jester.”

“Should we call a hospital?” he asked, hands shaking as he smoothed the hair away from Caleb’s forehead and the man lay practically unresponsive in his lap. This was new. Molly didn’t know how to deal with this. Physically, emotionally, or otherwise.

For the first time in a while Molly wished he had more experience than just his four years.

“Caleb doesn’t usually do hospitals. Can’t stand them,” Beau mumbled while the phone rang on the other line, then spoke up, “Jester, fuck, Caleb’s hurt really fucking bad, some undead thing. We’re at a cemetery, but we probably need to get out of here. I don’t think Caleb will want to talk about this with the Zhelezo.”

She started wandering off, pacing and reading out the name of the cemetery for Jester.

“She says it’s close, we can carry him back to her place,” Beau said, frowning down at the wizard.

Molly nodded, allowing Beau to help Caleb onto his back.

He wasn’t expecting Caleb to be so light. But Molly wasn’t sure whether to hope it was from Caleb not eating enough or the fact that the whole upper left side of his torso seemed to be rotted away.

Deciding not to dwell on either, he fell in line with Beau. “Lead the way.”

Beau stayed on the phone with Jester, getting directions as they tried to get Caleb out of there as quickly as they could. The man was groaning in pain with every pothole or step off the sidewalk, making Molly’s stomach roil.

This wasn’t exactly the end of the evening he’d been hoping for.

“Mollymauk,” Caleb’s voice mumbled in his ear, so close it would have made him shiver under any other circumstances. If he was shivering now, it was from fear.

Molly kept moving, but tried to peek back without poking the man with his horns. “You holding up okay back there?”

“Wo sind wir?” he mumbled, eyes still mostly vacant. Mostly empty.

Molly forced himself to look back forward. No time for that now. “You’re gonna need to say that in Common, or Infernal if you want me to understand.”

“Where are we?” he asked then, softly repeating the phrase in Infernal as well. His voice was faint, but at least he was talking. At least he had the mental acuity to think in three different languages. Of course he could probably do that on his deathbed. Molly pushed those thoughts down and tried to answer in a somewhat steady voice.

“Headed to Jester’s. You gave us quite the scare back there. Beau said you wouldn’t want a hospital.”

“Nein, nein. The smell… das Antiseptikum,” he said, trailing off again. “There’s a healing potion in my coat. Top right side, near the book.”

Molly hollered for Beau to come help them get it out, slowing just slightly so Caleb could take the thing. It was a small thing, just a little something to take the edge off. From what Molly saw, he would need to recuperate from this for days. Or weeks. Not dwelling on that either. Not when it was his dumb ass that got them in this situation.

He shifted Caleb further up his back, apologizing for the groan of pain the movement solicited. “Sorry, sorry. Almost there.”

Caleb seemed to be getting more alert after the potion, but that was bringing less haziness and more pain to his voice. His grip was getting stronger, brushing against the cut Molly had made on his chest. “You’re bleeding.”

“Please don’t tell me you’re trying to worry about me right now,” Molly wanted to glare at him, but the position didn’t quite allow for it.

“What if I am?” His voice was still weak, but he sounded indignant.

“You’re half dead on my back, and worried about my cut?” Molly was trying hard to keep his voice level.

“It felt like a lot of blood.”

“Sometimes when I see my friends rot from the inside out because of spectors and wraiths I’m supposed to be able to kill, I get a little carried away,” Molly grumbled, still sighing in relief as Jester’s apartment came into view.

Caleb sighed as well, “I’m quite the liability in the midst of battle. I need to stay further back.”

“Seconded. Not that you had much choice.”

“Wish I hadn’t used all my spells translating today,” he mumbled, resting his chin back down on Molly’s shoulder. “Could’ve used a shield once or twice, saved you the trouble. Or had time to cast mage armor.”

“Are you really critiquing the fight we just had where Beau and I were stumbling around wasted while you took every hit and destroyed both creatures?” Molly had heard hints of the self loathing, the lack of faith in himself before, but this was something else.

“I should not have taken every hit.”

“But it’s not your _fault_. If anything, it’s my fault that you-”

“CALEB!” Jester’s voice interrupted them, and probably anyone sleeping in a ten mile radius.

She wasn’t outdone by Nott, who appeared in the doorway and let out a scream that might have been Caleb’s name, and might have been a wordless screech of anguish.

“I’m fine, bitte, not so loud,” he mumbled, wincing at the sound and then in pain.

“What the _fuck_ did you do to my boy?” Nott hissed, blocking Molly’s way into the apartment. Jester was fawning over Caleb, lamenting not having prepared her better healing spell for the day.

“I’ll gladly let you rip my head off once I set him down so Jester can heal him, Nott.” Molly told her, stepping past easily and moving Caleb to the couch.

Caleb was frowning, “Nein, Schatz, I’m fine. No one’s fault but my own. And a wraith and a spector, if I’m not mistaken.”

“Nope, I’m gonna kill him. He let this happen to you.” Nott was hovering over Caleb, making death threats but not acknowledging Molly even after the wizard was set down.

“Nott, I care deeply for you. You are my little sister. Thank Molly for bothering to carry me here, go home, and sleep. Yeza and Luc need you.” 

“You need me, clearly. I was sleeping over at Jester’s anyways.” Nott fussed over him, eyes wide at the edge of the mark on Caleb’s neck.

Jester put a hand on Nott’s shoulder. “Nott, maybe you can find us some towels in the hall closet for now? And a glass of water.” Her voice trembled a little more than usual. It was the most sincere Molly had ever heard her.

Nott looked like she might argue, but then seemed happy to have something to do. Molly started trying to help Caleb out of his coat as Caleb protested. “Nein, wait, it will get the couch dirty-”

He tried to stand and fell back into Molly’s arms, mumbling apologies over another near whimper in pain.

“Caleb, if you don’t sit still, I’m going to cast hold person on you,” Jester threatened in a cheery voice that sounded far too brittle. “Now you can sit on the floor if you’d like, but I want you to take off your shirt and let me get started before Nott gets back.”

He fell silent, allowing Molly to lower him on to the plush carpet instead and strip off his shirt. Molly bit back a gasp at how wrecked his chest looked, decaying skin spanning from his left shoulder to the middle of his chest. Now that he was laid bare Molly could see how each breath the man took shook in his chest, and the grimace of pain across his face when he so much as moved a muscle.

Molly sat next to him, looking to Jester for anything he could do to help. She was mumbling to whatever weird deity it was she prayed to, so Molly just took Caleb’s hand.

Caleb held it like a lifeline, betraying how much pain he was really in. After a moment, Molly grabbed his belt, “Bite down on this. Try not to wake the whole neighborhood, yeah?” his tone was teasing, but just as brittle as Jester’s. Maybe worse.

And then Jester started the healing magic that sewed the damaged nerves and skin back together. The green magic glowed over the blackened skin, and Caleb was doing his best not to writhe with pain. Every time Jester had to touch the wound she apologized, and Molly had to call Beau over to hold down Caleb’s legs, keeping him from thrashing.

Beau looked like she might vomit or cry, but had twisted the set of her face into a mask that just looked furious.

Molly wondered idly what his own face looked like.

Skin turned from blackened and rotting to healed over in blooming purple bruises, and then the bruises faded to a sickly green color at the edges. The worst of it was still an angry purple where the direct contact had been, which Molly could now see as handprint shaped. Jester pulled back and Caleb spat out the belt.

“I’m tapped for today, but all the internal stuff is set. Should just be tender for a while,” Jester said, rubbing Caleb’s cheek. “Good thing I didn’t use any of my spells today.”

Nott appeared then, seeming grateful to have been sent away for the worst of it. Molly almost wished he had too. There were small crescents where Caleb’s nails had dug into his hand in pain, and his belt would have tooth marks on it for the rest of its days.

Still, it would pale in comparison to the feeling of guilt gnawing at Molly’s heart.

Jester used the towel to wipe away the sweat and tears, allowing him to sit up carefully, Molly at the ready to catch him. He sipped at the water Nott gave him like a man straight out of the desert, coughing and contorting into more pain. “Whoa, whoa, take it easy,” Molly said, rubbing his lower back, making sure to avoid any place he’d seen the blooming darkness.

“I’m prescribing bedrest. You’re not used to that kind of dark magic; it might take awhile for you to bounce back.” Jester was frowning at Caleb, and Molly noticed she was in her pajamas, a tired look on her face.

“Let’s get everyone home, yeah?” Molly mumbled. “Caleb, think you could tolerate a cab?”

“It’s not that far.”

“You’re not walking that far, and I’m certainly not carrying you. Beau, would you like to carry him this round?” Molly asked.

She rolled her eyes. “I’ll call the cab. Be right back. Don’t die while I’m not looking again, Caleb. Nearly gave me a heart attack.”

“I didn’t die,” he mumbled, now nursing sips from his glass of water. “Barely passed out this time. Could’ve been worse.”

“I don’t have any diamonds that big, Caleb. Please don’t be stupid,” Jester said, voice sounding sadder and softer than the words implied. She stood, ignoring Caleb’s promise to buy her one and starting to clean up the patch of blackened flesh that had stained her carpet before it set. Nott busied herself with helping her.

Caleb had propped himself up on the couch, looking like he might fall asleep at any moment. “How far is the cab ride to your apartment?”

Molly answered, “Like a half hour.” 

“We both have work tomorrow,” Caleb sighed.

Molly shook his head, “No, you don’t. You’re on bedrest for a week, remember?”

“Not you too,” Caleb said, head falling back onto the couch with a groan that was equal parts displeasure and pain. Molly rolled his eyes and looked over the bruises.

“Let me help you get your shirt on.”

Caleb started to grumble he could do it himself, but the wince across his face every time he so much as lifted his left arm gave him away easily. Molly got him his coat too, standing him up and offering an arm to hold. “But you have work tomorrow,” Caleb started again.

“That I do. Don’t worry, I’ve stayed up later.” Even so, Molly had never felt so exhausted in his life.

After making sure his coat was hanging right and looking at Molly’s arm like he was surrendering his pride, he took it and said, “You can sleep at our apartment. As thanks for carrying me. It’s closer to the Emporium anyways.”

That was tempting. That would mean almost another whole hour for Molly to sleep in tomorrow. “I might take you up on that.”

Caleb smiled, but there was too much pain behind it for Molly to enjoy it.

By the time they were all back at the apartment Beau was about ready to pass out at any moment. She had the next day off and told no one to expect to hear from her for at least 18 hours. Quietly she apologized to Caleb, which the man promptly brushed off, insisting it was fine and she just needed sleep. Molly promised to get Caleb set for bed and she was gone. They would probably need to talk at some point. The guilt on her face was something Molly probably would have seen in a mirror if he’d walked by one recently.

“I’ll take the couch, you can sleep in my room,” Caleb said, moving towards it.

Catching Caleb around his waist on his good side, Molly carefully redirected them. “No way. I understand if you’re not comfortable sharing your bed, but I’m not kicking you out of your bedroom.”

“The couch is not very comfortable.” Caleb frowned up at Molly, concern across his face.

“All the more reason for the person closer to death’s door not to take it.”

The wizard blinked away a wave of fatigue. “If you do not mind, I did buy a second pillow. And a third.”

“As much as I’d love a cuddle session with Beau, I think the third pillow might go under utilized tonight.”

Molly helped Caleb out of the coat again, asking where his pajamas were. Caleb mumbled that he didn’t care for the effort of putting on pants so long as Molly didn’t mind him in his boxers.

He certainly didn’t. Probably would have been more interested in the whole situation if circumstances were different.

But they weren’t. So he made sure Caleb got his teeth brushed, asked to borrow a pair of sweats, and closed himself in the small bathroom.

A shaky breath he didn’t know he was holding left his chest. He hadn’t heard of monster attacks near here, not recently. Logically he knew stuff like this happened all the time out in the world, but not in the middle of the city. Hells, he had seen plenty of it on his way to Nicodranas with Yasha and Desmond. In the right situation, he was a skilled fighter.

This was different. Desmond and Yasha could hold their own.

Caleb was a glass cannon with a crack running down the middle.

And Molly was starting to worry what would happen to his heart if that cannon shattered.


	23. Babysitting

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> recovering from the aftermath!! pleasant dreams, or are they?

### Chapter 23: Babysitting

Caleb was lying in his bed, trying not to move. He had trouble sleeping flat on his back, and he was unable to sleep on his left side like he tended to, facing the door. This was due to the slow aching bruise that still simmered under the surface of his flesh, the adrenaline finally starting to leave his body alone with the pain. He couldn’t tell which was worse, but he knew that sleeping would be difficult.

The alternative to his normal sleeping position was facing the wall, which was uncomfortable for a number of reasons. One because it left his back exposed, a mistake he felt unwilling to make twice in one night, and two because soon that space would soon be occupied by a very distracting purple tiefling. A distracting purple tiefling, who when sober, he was starting to trust to watch his back. That was a whole other can of worms Caleb didn’t want to deal with.

His mind was swimming with the events of the day. First the draining prospects at the animal shelter when he realized no street cat could ever truly replace Frumpkin. Then he had exhausted almost all of his spells, spending hours translating tomes for Yussa, and spent a few hours after that working on his research for Nott.

The fight in the graveyard still seemed like a hazy dream. One that didn’t make any real sense, only made concrete and real by the dull ache throughout his torso. He hadn’t fought like that since he was traveling with Nott, and even then he did his best to stay out of the way. She would find the perfect places for them to travel in the shadows, only showing themselves when necessary. This was unlike any of those fights, messy and unorganized. He was getting sloppy.

Mollymauk was a very talented swords person. One who could be scary as fuck when need be.

A valuable ally.

He frowned. Those weren’t his own thoughts. Molly’s value wasn’t based on his capabilities with a sword, much as Caleb’s training begged to disagree. 

Caleb didn’t like that voice in his head.

It was still too accurate to the original voice, cruel, cold and calculating. He wanted nothing more than to forget it, leave it behind, and keep his life in Nicodranas away from everything in his past. Away from flames that were directed at those he loved, not undead beasts threatening them in graveyards.

But his memory was perfect, and the fire had burned too bright tonight. The possibility of having made a mistake, being so exhausted that he centered the point wrong, caught Molly in the flames as well, it was too much. Even if he knew it would never happen, that the flames were easier to control than any other aspect of his magic, it was still too much.

Caleb knew he would dream of screams tonight.

He felt the bed shift beside him, Mollymauk slipping under the sheets. He could feel the tiefling staring at him, despite there being no light in the room. Idly Caleb wondered if he looked as exhausted and strung out as he felt with Molly’s darkvision.

Molly broke the silence after a moment, finally saying what must have been on his mind, “Will you let me apologize?”

“Nein,” Caleb said, not wanting to argue about his evening. He should have been stronger, he should have shielded himself and been better equipped to defend his friends without becoming a liability.

“I still shouldn’t have dragged you into all this,” Molly said softly, and Caleb could practically hear the guilt dripping from his voice.

He moved forward, just slightly, reaching in the dark to hold Mollymauk’s hand, or shoulder, or something. Molly must have seen exactly what he was doing, lacing their fingers together. “I should have been able to defend myself.”

“How can you be allowed to berate yourself for not being able to defend three people, but I can’t apologize for not being able to defend one?” Molly said, squeezing their conjoined hands.

Caleb chuckled, ignoring the shooting pain it sent through his side. “I don’t think either of us are in the right. If it makes you feel better, perhaps you can promise me something?”

“Anything,” Molly agreed quickly.

Nuzzling further into his pillow, Caleb suppressed a yawn, “If you’re going to do drugs in my apartment, I’d like a 24 hour heads up so I can save my best spells to keep you out of trouble.”

“I’ll agree to that, if you promise me something too,” Molly said.

That piqued Caleb’s interest through the haze of exhaustion, “Ja?”

“If we fight something again, you take cover and you fucking stay there.” Caleb could hear the teasing grin on Molly’s voice, causing him to chuckle again despite the pain. 

He smiled in the dark, wishing he could see Molly’s smile. “Deal.”

“How are you holding up?” Molly asked, unlinking their hands to brush hair away from Caleb’s face. As if his vision could be obscured in the dark.

“Fine. A little sore,” he said, wishing he could move without an ache.

“I mostly meant emotionally,” Molly murmured, pulling his hand back. Caleb almost missed the warmth enough to ask to have it back.

Instead he sighed. “It has been a long day. I want to sleep, but… My head is full.”

“You need your rest. What can I do to empty that pretty little head of yours?” Molly asked, teasing lilt sounding a little more hollow in the tiefling’s own exhaustion.

“Apparently I’m going to be forced to rest for a week.” Caleb sighed, wondering if Jester would know if he snuck into the shop to grab his research. He didn’t have enough at home to occupy himself. He should probably set up some kind of transportation circle in his study. Yussa probably wouldn’t mind, so long as he had copies of the sigil.

Molly snickered until the laugh turned into a yawn. “That doesn’t answer the question.”

“I’m not sure. I might wake you up. I don’t usually call out anymore, but I still have bad dreams.” He bit his lip, not really wanting to sleep to begin with. Caleb knew what the dreams would hold.

“Then I can return a favor.” Molly nestled further down into the blankets. “Still doesn’t answer my question.”

“I’m not sure. Can you turn a brain off?”

A pause. “Want some whiskey?”

Caleb snorted. “That might make it worse.”

“Oh, you like to listen to the CDs, right?” Molly sat up.

“Ja?”

“That’ll help,” Molly said definitively, shuffling about until the CD player was beside them on the bedside table, softly drowning out the worst of the echoes of the screaming. Molly slipped back into the bed, curling up again. Even with the space in between them Caleb could feel the overheated tiefling warming up the whole bed. “Better?”

“Enough,” he mumbled, going through his usual routine. Caleb started translating the phrases in his head, focusing on the words instead of his whirling thoughts. He didn’t even make it through the second song.

But he had been right about the screaming. 

Blood pounded in his ears as he shot up straight as a ramrod in bed, but it didn’t drown anything out. His breath came out ragged and shaky, his vision consumed with flames. A dull pain in his left shoulder started to spread as he moved too quickly.

That was good. That was grounding.

Then there was a voice.

A tentative hand on his other shoulder.

He blinked away the flames, seeing instead the darkness of his bedroom. On instinct he sent up a globule of light to illuminate the space. Caleb usually did so to prove he was alone. Tonight he wanted to make sure the right person was sitting with him.

Not that he would be strong enough to do anything tonight if it wasn’t.

That thought alone was terrifying.

“Hey, you’re alright. You’re safe. I’ll be damned if I let something get at you twice in one night.” Molly’s voice had lost its teasing quality, just a gentle murmur and a grounding touch. 

Caleb’s hand covered the purple one on his shoulder. “Sorry. Better now.” His voice sounded gruff with sleep and emotion.

Molly squeezed the shoulder gently. “No need to apologize. You sure you’re okay?”

Gingerly he lowered himself back against the pillow. “Honestly, the pain helps.” He covered his eyes with the back of his hand, more for the pressure than to hide from the light.

“So you’re telling me I should get fucked up by a zombie to fix my nightmares?” Molly asked. It was strange how Caleb could hear the characteristic grin on his face. It was nice.

“Nein. But it is quite grounding for the aftermath.” The soft sound of the CD was still playing. It was 4:49 in the morning. It should have stopped by now. Perhaps Molly had managed to set it to repeat.

Molly let go of his shoulder with a soft pat, and Caleb watched him snuggle back into the blankets.

Oh. That was cute.

He looked a little like a cat, curling up in a ball.

Caleb drifted off again, finding softer dreams. Hands running gently through his hair, Molly’s voice drifting, indistinct at most moments. Things clarified to the point he thought he might even be awake, hearing a few words here and there. “Please don’t scare me like that again,” was murmured over his head. But that didn’t make sense. Definitely a dream. A very nice dream.

Finally, Caleb woke to the soft sounds of Beau’s CD player and a woefully empty bed. And a roaring pain in his shoulder.

There was a note taped to the CD player, covering the track number, and someone had shut his curtains before the sun could shine Caleb’s eyes to wake him up. Grabbing the note he skimmed it.

> _Hey Caleb,_
> 
> _Had to run for my shift at the Emporium. Thanks for letting me stay the night, though! Just as a warning, there’s a whole group chat dedicated to looking after you. I think Nott’s already in the living room, and from the smell, she brought half the bakery with her._
> 
> _I’ll ask Calianna about your research when I grab coffee. I know you’ll be bored, but you should take it easy. Dr. Jester’s orders._
> 
> _Stay safe,  
>  -Molly_

Now that he was thinking about it, he could definitely smell cinnamon. His stomach growled and he felt his mouth start to water. It was 10:47 in the morning, and Caleb felt like he could have slept for another year. Judging by his stomach, that was probably what woke him.

After very gingerly pulling on a pair of sweatpants, a shirt, and a cardigan that was agony to slip over his shoulder, he was vaguely presentable. The cardigan had a high enough collar that he almost looked normal, even though the more cognizant he felt, the more he felt like utter shit.

His phone revealed that he was not a part of this group chat that Molly mentioned, which was both a relief and a worry. The thought of his friends all worrying about him like this made him sick to his stomach. Hopefully he could chalk that up to being ravenous, and not something to discuss with Pumat. “Hallo?” he called out, walking into the living room to see a pile of pastries and no people.

“Caleb!” Nott appeared from the kitchenette, and she was beaming, almost hiding all her concern with the smile. “How are you feeling?”

“Much, much better, Schatz,” he ruffled her hair, glad it wasn’t his dominant arm that felt like lead. In reality the ache was settling more and bothering him more and more now that the adrenaline was gone. He would slip into the bathroom and take some pain meds later though, after Nott stopped looking at him like he might shatter into a million pieces at any second.

“Good! Now, eat, eat. Get back your strength!”

He sat at the small table, grabbing a muffin off the top of the pile and starting to eat. “I’ve never been strong, Nott. But thank you. I’m really fine. You can go back home.”

“I won’t be here long-” before Caleb could sigh in relief, she continued, “Caduceus should be here soon to take my place.”

He frowned. “Caduceus?”

“He wants to take a look at your shoulder, and Jester’s busy working this morning. Now, don’t make that face you make when people care about you, Caleb. You’re wonderful and amazing and everyone wants to make sure you make a full recovery instead of going right back to work!” Caleb rolled his eyes at her as she admonished him as if he was Luc.

“Right, I should call Calianna,” he mumbled, ignoring the praise.

Nott shook her head. “Already done. She said she needed some extra hours anyways. You really should hire someone else too.”

“You already sell a decent number of books upstairs since we started that display of new releases. She can put a sign on the door that says half the staff was made into a zombie’s bitch and we’ll need a week to recover.” Caleb really didn’t like the idea of interviewing strangers to work at the shop, especially not when his arm was closer to dead than it should be.

She sighed, rolling her eyes, “Don’t pretend you don’t need the extra help sometimes. I think Fjord is looking for another gig now that Jester and I are getting the hang of running _Divine Delights.”_

“If he wants to use this as a trial period, tell him he’s welcome to train with Calianna.” Caleb sighed, knowing he wouldn’t be allowed out of the house while his friends were watching. He wasn’t sneaky enough to get past any of them, except maybe Yasha, or Nott if she had been drinking.

Not worth the risk.

Nott convinced him to eat almost half of the massive pile of food she had brought by the time Caduceus showed up. “Hi there, Mr. Caleb. Good to see you up and about.”

“Right as rain,” he joked, wondering if the firbolg would ask to see the bruise and figure out how badly he was lying.

He moved inside, carrying a tupperware full of the wonderful squash soup he had made for Caleb and Jester a few weeks earlier. “Happy to hear it. Hello, Nott,” he grinned down at the little goblin.

Their size difference was always something to behold. But Nott was already on her way out. “Nice to see you, Caduceus. I’ve got to run though; I’m picking up Luc from a half day at school. Feel better, Caleb!”

“Ja, ja, don’t worry about me.” He waved her off.

Caduceus slipped the soup into the fridge, looping back to look at Caleb. “I brought something for the bruising. Will you let me take a look?”

“Will you chastise me like everyone else?” he asked, feeling his exhaustion return.

“Not unless I think you really deserve it. I think I understand the issues of being a faint of heart magic user in battle a little bit better than the rest of the group.” Caduceus grinned. He was right of course. The two of them were some of the more fragile of the group, relying on magic much more than strength.

Caleb nodded. “We can go in the bathroom. Better light.”

Caduceus carefully helped him out of his cardigan and shirt and started rubbing some enchanted arnica cream over his bruises. Caleb could feel him casting a spell under his breath, healing him again as he rubbed in the freezing cold gel. He didn’t bring up the fact that it was bad enough to need more healing, just grateful for the reduction in pain.

The firbolg helped him into a clean shirt and back into the cardigan that hid most of the damage. Pulling back from their joint work, Caduceus smiled down at him, ruffling Caleb’s hair. “Now, you look beat. Do you want to do anything else, or just rest?”

Caleb chose sleep. At least at that point he could avoid everyone babysitting him. He wanted to tell them not to, that he didn’t deserve the kindness they all showed him, but that would only cause more trouble. They never believed him. With the CD player still softly playing he let the exhaustion take him again.


	24. Geheime Geschenke

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Caleb won't feel like he's being coddled if the M9 forces their way into his apartment to look after him under the guise of throwing a party right? right?
> 
> also fantasy zemnian secret santa because I said so

### Chapter 24: Geheime Geschenke

“Do you think Caleb knows how to facetime?” Molly asked.

Nott looked at him across the counter of _Divine Delights_ like he was crazy. “He didn’t even know how to text when I met him.”

“Well, have you taught him?”

“Neither of us like to be on camera much. It’s hell convincing him to even sit still for a picture. So no.” She rolled her eyes, passing over Molly’s coffee.

He frowned, thinking of all the piles of books. For the office being relatively new, Caleb had completely filled it already. “Well. It’s high time you both got over that. I’ll try it, if he doesn’t want to pick up, he doesn’t have to. I really rather not describe every book in his office to him over the phone. More than half of them are in like Elven or Sylvan or Celestial. I think.”

He went downstairs into Caleb’s office, looking at the piles and piles of books. There was no way he could figure out what Caleb was actually working on. There wasn’t even a book left on his desk. He pulled up the app and attempted the video call.

The resulting image was extremely grainy, but Caleb answered all the same. He looked better than he had that morning, probably in part due to Caduceus standing beside him calmly explaining how facetime worked on the other side. Despite that meaning he had needed another round of healing, it lifted a small weight from Molly’s chest. “Molly? Was ist das? I didn’t even know my phone could do this,” Caleb was squinting into the screen, and Molly had to try his best not to laugh at the strange image. Caleb was adorable and he didn’t even know it.

“Hello to you too! I just wanted to ask which ones of these books you wanted, and even if I called I absolutely cannot speak any of these languages.” Molly waved the phone around to show where he was and which possible stack of books he was supposed to grab.

Caleb’s face brightened considerably. “Oh! That is very kind of you. I’ll need that one in Sylvan there, no, not that one, that’s Celestial-the, the green one. The bigger green one-”

Slowly they got a massive pile of what he was currently working on onto his desk. Molly looked at the daunting towers of books and wondered what Caleb could possibly need all of them for. “That better have been the last one.”

“Ja. I guess that’s too much to bring to the house. We can go through them again and I’ll tell you which are really important-”

“I’ll get them there.” Molly interrupted, not mentally prepared to look at more books he couldn’t read for another minute. He had an idea anyways. “See you in a bit, Caleb, Caduceus.”

Caleb turned the phone so Caduceus could wave. At almost the same time Caleb said, “Tchüss” and Caduceus said, “Bye, Molly.”

“Now, you hit that button right there, no the red one-”

And then they were gone.

Molly had a few people to text, first running his plan by Beau, then throwing it in the other group chat for everyone but Caleb. But soon almost everyone he knew (other than Caduceus and Caleb) was piled into the small office, grabbing a stack of books and starting the short walk over to Beau and Caleb’s apartment. Even Yasha was here, coming back early from chasing the storms after she heard that almost all the people she cared about were attacked in the middle of the night.

The idea came from Caleb’s reluctance to be taken care of, so they might as well pretend it was just a party and not an excuse to look after him. If he didn’t want to hang out with them, he could go rest in his room, which was also a win. He wouldn’t think they were coddling him at the very least, if they were also forcing him into social interaction.

They piled into the small apartment, finding Caleb curled up on the couch with Caduceus and sitting in what seemed like relative silence in front of a nature documentary. He sat up, wincing a bit but smiling. “Hallo? What are you all…?”

“Alright, Caleb, where do you want these? ‘Cause they’re not living on the kitchen table again, and I threw out all your old boxes,” Beau said, interrupting him and hefting a pile of books almost as tall as Yasha’s.

She was sweating, but hadn’t complained at all about the weight next to the taller woman.

“Oh, the desk in my room is fine, I can help-” Caleb started to get up until Caduceus held him back.

“Oh, no you don’t. Honestly, you shouldn’t lift some of those heavier ones with your left arm for a while, okay?”

Caleb deflated, sinking back into the couch. Molly ditched his books quickly to join them, slipping down between them, “I’m surprised you’re not ripped, carrying those things around all day.”

“Typically it’s just one. Or I put them in here,” he pulled out a piece of amber, still looking down.

“You’ll have to show me how that works sometime,” Molly said, looking at the strange lump of amber on a chain. He liked watching Caleb do magic, but needed some positive memories of the experience. Last night was all he could think of.

Molly leaned lightly into Caleb’s good side, wanting to apologize again but knowing he wouldn’t get through to Caleb. “So, Caduceus, does bedrest exclude alcohol?”

“Not if you’re responsible.” The firbolg shrugged, looking at Jester.

She grinned. “Yeah! Alcohol is a pain killer too, right?”

“I’m not sure that’s the best way to help the issue,” Fjord said, putting a hand on Jester’s shoulder.

Jester pouted while everyone piled back into the room, Beau distributing beer and wine from the fridge and asking what they should order for food. Jester started raving about a local restaurant that had just been opened by a family from Emon in Tal’Dorei. She dragged Fjord to sit with her in an armchair that was big, but not meant for two, and pulled up the menu. Jester started suggesting things, deciding they could get a few entrées and just share around. Nott curled up at Caleb’s feet, resting on his knees, and the rest of the crew had gathered in the small living room as well.

Food on the way, Jester started talking about a party for Winter’s Crest. She insisted that they should make one thousand paper snowflakes to decorate the large windows in her apartment. “And everyone can come over and give out presents and eat cookies and drink cocoa and be happy!” she was beaming, exuberant as ever.

“Ah, perhaps for Winter’s Crest this year we could do a Zemnian tradition. It’s usually to save money, but it’s very fun. It’s called Geheime Geschenke. We all put our names in a hat, and pick one in secret, and then get that person a present. On Winter’s Crest we give each person our present.”

“That sounds like less presents,” Nott said, frowning a little from her seat at Caleb’s feet.

Caleb shook his head, “This way instead of everyone trying to buy seven presents, we can each buy one nice present for one person. Seven shitty little presents or one good one.”

“I think it sounds fun! I like the secret part.” Jester was already grinning, excited about a secret she might not be able to keep. 

Beau left to get a piece of paper and some pens, Yasha wandering with her to help cut the paper into strips.

Smiling after them, Molly turned to look over at Caleb. He bit his lip and wondered how to rig the game in his favor so he could get the perfect present for the wizard. It was the least he could do after last night. Before he could figure out some way to set up the drawing of names that would get Caleb’s little slip of paper in his hand, Nott grabbed all the slips and folded them carefully, mixing them up a bit before sending the hat around.

Inside the hat, he could feel the gentle push of air of a mage hand, putting one slip more prominently before him. No one else seemed to notice, and he didn’t even think that Caleb had that spell. Caleb wasn’t focused on him at all, still trying to explain to an insistent Nott that this was better overall.

Nott was staring directly at Molly. He had seen her utilize that magic quite a bit at _Divine Delights._

The paper in his hands said “Caleb Widogast” in an elegant but scrawling script. He would have to find a way to thank her.

“Food is here! Everyone hide your piece of paper and come help yourself in the kitchen! Well, everyone but Caleb; we’ll bring you one!” Jester had insisted on picking up the tab, telling everyone they could just repay her by turning her Winter’s Crest party into a potluck.

Molly waited in the kitchen until it was just him and Nott, both trying to grab food for Caleb before realizing their plan was the same. They consolidated their plates into one as Molly stared at her pointedly. 

“You rigged the game.”

Nott answered quietly, “It wasn’t going to be very fun if I didn’t. Fjord doesn’t even know my real name, much less what I like for presents.”

Molly broke a smile. “Still, I owe you one. What do you want?”

“Buy me a present?” she said, cocking an eyebrow with a mischievous grin.

Molly grabbed the plate and two more beers for him and Caleb. “What would you like? For that matter, what would Caleb like?”

Shrugging casually, Nott said, “Caleb likes magical things he hasn’t seen before. Sometimes the Meandering Treasures has nice things, but that’s rare. But you owe him something really good after last night. Don’t cheap out on him. As for me, I like shiny things. Or cool buttons.”

He bit his lip, thinking. As far as things went, the wrath of Nott manifesting in making sure Molly got Caleb the perfect present was a lot more manageable than he thought. Perhaps Gustav or Desmond would have something special they could agree to give him a discount on over at the Emporium.

“Oh, and I didn’t give Caleb your name. Partly because that would be suspicious, and partly because I gave him my name. Now go, before that food gets cold.”

“Wait, Nott.”

She frowned, “What?”

“What’s your real name? Just so I can know you better than Fjord,” he asked, grabbing a beer for Caleb as she started to carry out Caleb’s plate.

She stared at him a moment, contemplating. “Veth. Veth Brenatto.”

Molly grinned at her. “If I knew my real name, I’d tell you too. If I figure it out, I’ll let you know.”

He got quite a look for that, but it was worth it.

Molly was at a bit of a loss on how to figure out if the wizard would already have whatever present he bought. He supposed he would just have to ask Nott whenever he found something worthwhile, or ask Beau to check his room for it. That ruined a bit of the secrecy, but those two could probably keep a secret. As long as they weren’t directly asked.

Well. Maybe they couldn’t.

At least he had two weeks to figure it out.

His phone buzzed in his pocket.

>   
>  **Jester:** MOLLY!!!!!!!!  
>  **Jester:** I got FJORD in the gift exchange thingy!!!!  
>  **Jester:** You have to help me find a present that’s like kinda flirty but also kinda serious so that he knows I like him????  
>  **Jester:** Like, like like him  
>  **Jester:** You’re good at flirting, right???  
>  **Jester:** heLLLLP!!!  
> 

Before he could even fully smother his laugh, another text popped up.

>   
>  **Yasha:** molly i got beau in the gift thing what do i do  
> 

It was going to be a very fun two weeks to figure it all out.

Eventually he helped Yasha get Beau a set of some at home gym equipment. After assuring her that Beau wouldn’t see it as Yasha not wanting to hang out with her at the gym, Molly convinced her to get the one that would be tricky and heavy to put together. She could offer to help Beau put it together, and maybe work out in private.

Beau could take that at face value, or read into it. And maybe if Caleb got “sexiled” from his apartment, he and Molly could hang out more.

Jester was harder, mostly because he only knew Fjord through Caduceus. They’d hung out a few times, but certainly not often. He knew that the half orc had been a sailor, but that ended poorly. He also knew that the two had some religious differences, with Fjord pretty much completely devoting himself to the Wildmother when Jester was pretty adamant that the Traveler was the only god for her. 

Eventually they went for something a bit less flirty and more sentimental. The two of them needed to get a bit closer before anything serious happened, at least in Molly’s opinion. Jester seemed… naïve. Or at the very least sheltered. And while Fjord would probably be good to her, Molly wanted to make sure there was a decent foundation there.

They had a symbol of the Wildmother made for him, a silver wreath of grain, backed by a crook that hooked the pendant to a chain, but surrounding a blue sapphire that looked just like the sea. A tad flirty, just because it was jewelry and Jester’s nickname from her mother was “little sapphire,” but also meaningful and very well crafted. Molly didn’t ask how much the piece cost, or how much money Jester was still getting from her mother, since the gift was perfect.

And he wasn’t above spending too much money on his strange Zemnian gift exchange present either. Nott was tricky, but Molly decided on getting her a little locket engraved with the initials of her and her husband Yeza. A little shiny thing that he could stick a picture of Yeza and Luc in that he stole off her Instagram.

It would also be easy to slip in her coat pocket when no one was looking, just as a quiet thanks.

Caleb’s gift was another issue entirely. He asked Desmond to keep an eye out while he was in the city, or to sift through some of the things he’d brought back. Gustav said he had something in mind, but had been too busy to show it to him.

But there was something promising about how Gustav had talked about this old spellbook Desmond had found that Molly felt might be worth the wait.


	25. Feuer

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I know everyone was hoping for Frumpkin but... we gotta get some stuff out of the way first.

### Chapter 25: Feuer

Caleb was excited for Winter’s Crest this year. Instead of the usual guilt of not knowing the perfect gifts to get for all of his friends, he had one person to get a present for. And it was Nott.

Nott was always pretty easy because she thought everything he did was amazing. But this year he was hoping to give her something she had been wanting for years. He was compiling a notebook with everything he’d discovered about transmuting living flesh, making a permanent change from one body to another. A spell that could turn a goblin into a halfling, permanently, was finally within his grasp.

Slowly, and with Yussa keeping an eye out for helpful tomes, Caleb was almost there. He was finally ready to approach Nott and Yussa to help with the spell. The week he’d spent stuck in his apartment, he’d gotten an unprecedented amount of work done as his bruising healed. After he was able to move most of his books back into the study in the bookstore, he’d had a breakthrough. Together they could find it’s components and work on getting Nott back to being Veth.

It was the perfect gift, and they could get started right away. Yussa was back in town, and Caleb was doing enough research with him that he felt almost indebted to. Almost. He could ask one favor of the man who asked many of him. The guilt would probably only bother him for a week, tops.

And this year he didn’t have to worry about Jester spending hundreds of gold on him, or Yasha asking what he wanted three hundred times because he had no clue. Or at least, he hoped he didn’t. At the very least, if Yasha did have his name, she had to keep it secret.

It was perfect. He wished he’d come up with it years ago.

The only shame was that he had no reason to give Mollymauk a present. He had been trying to find a loophole for that, and figured perhaps he could do something special for Molly the Whelsen before Jester’s party.

When he saw a flyer for the circus coming to town for a special week of Winter’s Crest performances, he was ecstatic. Two tickets weren’t even that expensive, but he knew Molly would love them. He just had to make sure Molly didn’t already have plans made for the two of them. The tiefling put a ridiculous amount of care and effort in making sure that Caleb would have a whole host of new items to memorize the Infernal vocabulary for.

Caleb owed him this much.

>   
>  **Caleb:** If you do not already have plans for our next Infernal lesson, I believe I have found something enjoyable.
> 
> **Molly:** :o  
>  **Molly:** Consider my curiosity peaked
> 
> **Caleb:** It’s piqued, but I’m pleased.
> 
> **Molly:** You’re telling me common has three different ways to spell peaked??  
>  **Molly:** What an absolutely ridiculous language
> 
> **Caleb:** Zemnian is much better, if you’d like me to teach you.
> 
> **Molly:** I’ll need some kind of excuse to hang out with you after you’re fluent in infernal :p  
>  **Molly:** Should I wear something special??
> 
> **Caleb:** I would tell you dress ostentatiously, but I didn’t think that would be necessary.
> 
> **Molly:** Curiosity mounting by every passing moment  
>  **Molly:** Excitement a close second  
> 

Caleb smiled down at his phone, wondering idly if he should look up some vocabulary that would be utilized during the show. In the end he figured he would just let Molly teach him. If he didn’t learn everything he needed to, it would just be an excuse to go again.

He refused to read into how much he wanted Molly to enjoy the show, and how badly he had wanted to do at least something for the tiefling for Winter’s Crest. It was just as thanks for the many times that Molly had been needlessly kind to him, going out of his way to do small things. From grabbing his favorite coffee to translating a total of seven Infernal CDs into Common for Caleb, Molly was always managing to do sweet things.

Only fitting to do a few back. There was no meaning behind it besides congenial friendship.

“So?” Molly was practically buzzing with energy when he walked into Caleb’s office. “Where are we going?”

Caleb looked up from his notes and almost choked on the muffin he was eating. Mollymauk was wearing the tightest leather pants he had ever seen. His coat was open and flowing, a mesh shirt and some kind of deep maroon crop top that might have just been lingerie was showing underneath. Ostentatious indeed.

He suddenly felt a little underdressed even though he had dug out his nicest pair of dark jeans and a red-orange sweater Jester had once complimented him for wearing. He felt a little silly wearing something that matched his hair, but he also didn’t want to stand out too much in the crowd by being bland. Of course, no one looked too closely at him when he was with Molly. It was reassuring.

“It is a surprise.”

It was a joy to watch Molly try to guess where they were going, practically skipping his way to their destination. Caleb couldn’t look too closely as the tight leather pants that left little to the imagination. But the elated look on Molly’s face was something that made Caleb grateful for his perfect memory.

The look on the purple tiefling’s face when he saw the bright flashing lights and heard the music from the circus tent was something Caleb wanted to remember for the rest of his life.

“Caleb, this is the best thing ever.” Molly was staring wide eyed at everything. “I think in another life I could have been a part of the circus or a carnival or something. Don’t you think it would suit me?”

“If I didn’t know you, I’d think you worked here,” Caleb said, smiling at the man. “Now, what are all these things in Infernal?”

Molly grinned from ear to ear, beginning to point things out and having Caleb repeat them. The whole show was like that, whispered conversations about what to call the trapeze artists, the contortionists, the fire breathers, everything. They spoke in disjointed Infernal, with Molly only teasing Caleb about his accent once or twice. Molly had to stop and look up the names of a few of the rarer creatures they had in the show, not remembering the Infernal name for a Blink Dog or a Nightmare.

There was a bright red tiefling eating fire that interested Caleb. He was trying to see if there were some similarities in their spells, or if it was all just showmanship. It seemed to be mostly a cantrip and lots of flourishes. Even though Caleb’s flames burned brighter, he strongly doubted he had the dexterity to do any of the juggling the man on stage was doing. There was a lot of that around: people on unicycles taller than Caleb had ever seen, on stilts, spinning plates, even knife throwing. Perhaps Beau and Nott would like to come with him before the show closed.

But Caleb couldn’t complain about his chosen company tonight.

The acrobats and trapeze artists seemed to be a crowd favorite, doing stunts that had Caleb wide eyed, reaching for the crow’s feather he kept in his coat, just in case one of them made a mistake. Of course he wasn’t sure how to tell, with the dramatic dives, flips, and gasps from the audience. He watched the faces of the performers carefully, making sure none of them looked panicked. Their confident appearances helped him relax slightly.

“What’s that?” Molly whispered, seeing him worrying at the little black feather in his fingers.

“Oh, das ist…” Caleb flushed softly, feeling silly worrying about the performers. “I have a spell that is helpful if someone falls. I’m sure they’re fine; they probably have a wizard somewhere in the crowd doing the same. Just… want to be of use if necessary.”

The look on Molly’s face was indescribable. He was staring intensely at Caleb, so much so that Caleb felt his cheeks heat up more. “I know, it’s silly,” he mumbled, looking back at the performers.

“I think it’s sweet,” Molly said, squeezing his hand that wasn’t holding the feather.

Caleb squeezed back gently, waiting for the inevitable moment when he would let go.

He didn’t let go.

Neither did Caleb.

The show was spectacular, all the more fascinating because Molly was adoring every second of it. The performers whirled in colors that almost rivaled the tiefling’s tattoos, and it was the most fun Caleb had experienced at a performance ever. Typically he was dragged to things, like watching Marion Lavorre at the Lavish Chateau. Which, while he enjoyed her singing, he was never there of his own accord and never able to do much beyond listen.

Now he was here of his own volition, his own idea, and he had picked the company. The wonderful, ecstatic to be there with him company. He was also studying a language at the same time. It was perfect.

The light in Molly’s eyes was beautiful. Watching his passion was practically intoxicating, and Caleb never wanted it to end. Even after the show, Molly was buzzing. And he still hadn’t let go of his hand. Caleb wasn’t sure he’d ever get used to the easy physical intimacy that Molly shared with everyone. Jester was much the same in the beginning, but Caleb wasn’t even completely over that crush either.

What a ridiculous man he was, falling for these whirlwinds of color and personality. Still, with Molly’s hand in his own, Caleb felt warm and content.

“That was wonderful, Caleb. You’re a genius.”

“I don’t think it would take a genius to figure out you’d enjoy the circus. But I’m glad you enjoyed it.” Caleb smiled. Molly might not have considered the experience a Winter’s Crest present, but at the very least they were enjoying the holiday season together.

His phone buzzed in his pocket, Beauregard’s name popping up across his screen. As soon as he picked up she started talking, not even letting him say hello.

“Caleb, where are you?”

“I’m walking back to the apartment with Mollymauk. Why? What’s wrong?” Caleb frowned, continuing to walk alongside Molly. Beau soundeded panicked, much more than usual.

“Stop. Don’t come back to the apartment right now, okay?” she said, her voice crackling with a bit of static.

Caleb frowned, not slowing his pace just yet. “That’s not an answer. I suppose I could go to the bookstore. Or ask if I could stay at Mollymauk’s for an hour or two.” He looked over to Molly who nodded in agreement.

“No, not just a few hours, Caleb. Yasha already said that she could take you in tonight, that Mollymauk wouldn’t mind. I’m going to stay with Jester for a bit.” Beau was dancing around something, and a curl of anxiety twisted through Caleb’s gut.

He swallowed, trying to keep his voice calm. She was clearly worried about upsetting him, which meant something awful had happened. Caleb just had to take a deep breath and believe it wasn’t as bad as his brain was making it out to be. It was probably a simple robbery or something, and Beau was just worried about him. The neighborhood they lived in wasn’t the best, and his protective wards disguised as graffiti could only do so much. It would be fine.

“Can you just tell me what happened?”

“Look, do you like, trust Molly? Like to see you vulnerable or take care of you?”

Maybe it was worse than a robbery. It was probably still fine. Mostly likely. It had to be. “Ja, Beauregard. Just tell me what happened. Is everything okay?”

She sighed deeply, “I don’t want to freak you out when I’m not there. You’re sure you trust him?”

“Ja, I trust Mollymauk. Will you just tell me what’s going on? This is only worrying me more.” Caleb frowned, slowing down his stride but not stopping. He couldn’t stop completely without slowing down the crowd around them, still leaving from the circus. Molly slowed to match him, cocking his head in an unspoken question.

“I just wanna say first, no one got hurt, I mean, no one I know got hurt, and I got out all your books, okay? But Caleb, the earthquake last week messed with the boiler or something in the basement. There was a fire.”

She kept talking, and Caleb vaguely registered that his research was safe somehow. Beau had saved it. But the rest of him had shut down.

“Es ist wieder passiert,” he mumbled, feeling the phone slip through his fingers. _It happened again._ Somewhere far away he could hear Molly asking if he was okay, but it was too quiet over the screaming in his ears.

“Er hat mich gefunden.”

_He found me._


	26. Trust

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Apologies for the cliff hanger last chapter! Hope you all enjoy it! Molly does his best and Caleb... Caleb is trying.
> 
> (if anyone wants to scream about the episode with me tonight hmu on tumblr @anniethepsychic)

### Chapter 26: Trust

“Ja, I trust Mollymauk. Will you just tell me what’s going on? This is only worrying me more.” That was odd. Why was Caleb saying he trusted him? Who the hell was he talking to?

Molly was still buzzing with excitement after the circus and all he wanted was to curl up on Caleb’s couch and talk about the performance in Infernal. Of course, Caleb’s Infernal wasn’t amazing, but it would still be really adorable to watch his brow furrow as he thought about vocabulary. It was absolutely an excuse to stare, but Molly was flying so high he didn’t care.

Then he watched as Caleb stopped in the middle of the sidewalk, dropping his phone and muttering in Zemnian with wide, panicked eyes.

_Fuck._

“Caleb, are you okay?” he asked, grabbing the hand that was still holding an imaginary phone to his ear. “Who was that?”

Caleb kept mumbling, not meeting his eye and beginning to shake. “Er hat mich gefunden.”

Molly swore in Infernal under his breath, grabbing the phone off the pavement. “Hello? Who’s there?”

Beau’s voice crackled through the phone. “Molly, thank the fucking gods. Is he okay?”

“I…” Molly looked at Caleb, a pit of dread curling in his stomach, “I don’t think so. What the hell did you tell him?”

“Our apartment caught on fire. The earthquake last week fucked some stuff up in the boiler room as far as we can tell. I think everyone’s okay, like no one died this time. Can you just take him back to your apartment for now? Yasha knows. I’ll… I’ll get Caduceus to call you.” She sounded more frantic than Molly had ever heard, and with the empty look on Caleb’s face, he could understand.

Molly took a deep breath, pushing down his own mounting panic. He could do this. He could do this for Caleb. “Yeah, I’ll take care of him. You can just have Caduceus call this phone since he’ll have the number.”

“Yeah, yeah. I can do that,” she paused. “Look, Caleb is like my brother, okay? He’s strong most of the time but…He’s gonna be fragile right now. Probably. This will probably be worse than usual. Like way worse. Poor bastard is losing another fucking home… Fucking hells. Just make sure he gets somewhere safe, okay?”

“I’ll… I’ll do my best, Beau. Make sure Cad calls me soon.”

“Okay. Hold on a second would you, I’m on the fucking phone- The Zhelezo want to talk to me about some bullshit, I've gotta go.”

Molly moved back in front of Caleb, letting go of his hand and placing both his hands on Caleb’s cheeks instead, tipping his head up to look him in the eye. “Caleb, are you with me?” he asked, patting one of the cheeks gently.

“Bren.”

“What?” he asked, unsure if that was more Zemnian. It sounded like Caleb was trying to correct him, but he really didn’t know what was happening. “Caleb, you’re starting to freak me out here. Are you in there?”

“Mollymauk?” There was a sliver of recognition in his eyes that calmed some of the turbulence that had started growing again in Molly’s stomach.

Molly sighed softly, though he wasn’t out of the woods yet. “Yes, Caleb. I’m right here with you. You’re safe,” he said, pulling the man in closer and kissing him on the forehead. “We should get you off the street, yeah?”

Caleb nodded, suddenly looking around like everyone who passed by might be out to get him. “Where are we going?”

“You’re going to stay with me and Yasha tonight, okay?”

He started pulling back then, shaking his head at Molly. Caleb’s eyes were wide with fear like all the old pictures from Nott’s instagram. It looked like he’d regressed back five years and might shatter at any moment. “Nein, it’s not safe for you. You shouldn’t be around me. I should… I should go.”

Even though Molly thought he could outrun Caleb, that wasn’t the direction he wanted this to go in. Especially since Caleb didn’t seem to be aware of anything, much less cars or buses. “Caleb, dear, if I have to drag you all the way downtown I will. I’m not leaving you alone. I can take care of myself, and I’d really like to help take care of you. Besides, do you have anywhere else to go?” Molly, grabbed the man’s hand firmly, trying to keep him rooted to the spot.

His eyes were wild and he began muttering in Zemnian again, and Molly was pretty sure he was listing a few different cities in Tal’Dorei. 

“Oh no, you don’t,” he grumbled, gently but pointedly hooking arms with the near frantic wizard. Molly was worried about forcing the contact, but if he lost Caleb in the crowd, it sounded like he might never see him again. He couldn’t let that happen. And he could see a slight relaxing of Caleb’s shoulders at the contact, which reassured him. “We can take a cab or the subway, or even take a really long walk, but I’m not letting you out of my sight. I care about you way too much to let you teleport yourself to Tal’Dorei because of an accident. And if you do, you’ll be taking me with you.”

“You shouldn’t care about me,” Caleb said, but there was more defeat in his voice as Molly started walking in the direction they came, against the flow of people leaving the circus.

Molly shook his head. “Too late for that one, Caleb.”

“This is my fault.”

“This was an accident.”

“That’s what they told people last time too.” He sounded defeated and heartbroken all at once, like he might crumble into a million pieces at any moment.

“Do you want to talk about that right now, or do you want to go to my apartment? Or the bookstore? We could call Caduceus from there.” Molly’s mind was racing. He couldn’t think that much about these little tidbits he was getting. No one died “this time.” And “last time” they told people it was an accident. What the fuck had happened? Beau said he was losing another home… 

Caleb let himself get pulled along in silence for a moment, letting Molly’s mind race around him in circles. “Will Yasha be there?” he asked, voice husky like he was holding back tears. Molly’s heart was breaking and he didn’t know what to do.

“I think so. If not, her shift should end soon.” It’d better. This was too much for Molly to deal with on his own. He had no training, no context, and he was terrified of making it worse.

The wizard nodded slowly, “In Ordnung.”

“Gonna have to explain that one to me,” Molly said, keeping them walking towards the subway.

“Oh, it just means ‘alright.’ Entschuldigung.”

“And that one.”

“‘Sorry.’”

Molly slipped back into their normal routine as they walked, but instead of teaching Caleb Infernal, he asked him questions about Zeminan. Of course without the perfect recall and a crazy good memory for language he knew he wouldn’t keep most of it in his head, but it seemed to keep Caleb with him. Even if his voice sounded hollow.

Even if he seemed completely lost. Completely empty. Molly gave up on the idea of getting him on a crowded subway and hailed a cab once they got to a busier street. Caduceus called Caleb’s phone then.

“Hello, Mr. Mollymauk. How is he?”

Molly wasn’t sure if Caleb was listening, but he still tried to answer quietly. “I’m not sure. Not great.”

Caduceus hummed on the other side of the phone. “Do you think he could talk on the phone?”

Molly pulled the cell away from his mouth, covering the receiver, “Caleb, would you like to talk to Caduceus?”

He met Molly’s eyes, his own still that beautiful bright blue, but a thousand miles away. Eventually he nodded and Molly handed him the phone.

Molly couldn’t hear Caduceus’s words any longer, but could hear the soft rumbling of his voice on the other side of the phone. “I can’t say that. I’m not safe. We’re not safe.” His eyes flashed to meet Molly’s just for a fraction of a second. “Molly isn’t safe with me.”

“I won’t lie to myself. I don’t know it wasn’t him. You can't know it wasn't him.”

What the everloving _fuck_ had happened to this man? Molly wanted to find whoever had made him feel so unsafe in the world and make sure they met a painful demise at the end of two scimitars.

Caleb frowned then, closing his eyes and taking a few deep breaths. Molly recognized the grounding that Caleb had walked him through only a week ago, though it had felt like an eternity since the cave-in at the fancy wine cellar.

“My necklace. He can’t see me.” Caleb’s hands flew to his throat, flipping the pendant over his fingers. Something you could feel.

“Cigarettes.” Smell, probably. The cab didn’t smell great. Not that any ever did.

Sight was next, if Molly remembered correctly. If the order even mattered. Caleb met his eyes, focusing on him intently for the first time since Beau’s phone call. “Mollymauk.”

“Ja, I have them,” Caleb said, ruffling through his pockets for the tin of lemon candies. The grimace and pucker his face twisted into might have been cute in a different circumstance. “I hear you.” Caleb looked over at Molly like he was in pain.

“Ja, I still hear them,” he said softly. “Quieter now. But still screaming.”

Molly couldn’t take it. He took Caleb’s free hand and squeezed it gently. Caleb looked over, surprised but seemingly grateful, and squeezed back tightly.

Caduceus got Caleb mostly functional by the time they got to Molly’s apartment. Molly flitted around the living room, unsure exactly what to do to help. Yasha’s dog, Yarrow, was still in its kennel, whining softly, but she would be back soon. The toothbrush Caleb had used last week was still in the bathroom, so that was good.

Caleb’s apartment was burning. He didn’t know if the man would even have any clothes by the end of this ordeal. At least the outfit he wore to the circus was nice. Too nice. Maybe he wouldn’t be comfortable in it.

“Mollymauk.” The voice startled him out of his near pacing and he moved before Caleb.

Taking in Caleb’s slightly less empty appearance, he sighed softly. “How can I help?”

“I just wanted to thank you,” Caleb was speaking softly, not meeting his eyes. “I tried to do something for you and now you’re back to looking after me like a child.”

“You’re not a child.” Molly sat beside Caleb on the couch. “This is normal for someone with trauma. I just want to help. Let’s get you set up to sleep here for a while, yeah? You’re welcome to our pull out couch as long as you need.”

Molly wished desperately that Yasha would have let him see her more vulnerable so he would have some inkling of what the hell he was supposed to be doing to comfort Caleb. He knew how to patch her up after she came back from the fighting pits, listen to her vent, but this was way different. Caleb was adrift at sea, and Molly was out of his depth.

Together in silence they pulled out fresh sheets and the old mattress topper Molly had used before his current one, making the pullout couch into a luxurious pile. Molly knew it wasn’t a terribly uncomfortable place to sleep, as he had slept on it frequently before actually going out to buy a bed. The Lavish Chateau paid much much better than the Emporium, but the first things he’d bought were all clothes.

Eventually he gave up and let out Yarrow, promising the dog that Yasha would take him outside soon but wanting to stop the gentle whining. Normally he would take the cute little dog out for a walk on his own, but he didn’t want to leave Caleb alone, or to take him anywhere the man could bolt.

Yarrow trotted right up to Caleb, excited to meet him, since last time Yasha had taken him away with her. He stuck a hand out awkwardly, allowing himself to be sniffed, but clearly wasn’t a dog person. Luckily the dog was well trained and hadn’t been able to sniff the apartment for hours, so he busied himself doing that.

Molly got back to work trying to make Caleb feel at home and grabbed the clothes that Caleb had borrowed last time, folding them up near his toothbrush on the pull out couch.

When he’d hoped to be able to have Caleb stay the night in his apartment again, this really wasn’t what he’d had in mind.

“For now, the living room will be your space. Yasha and I will have to come and go to leave and stuff, but if you want to be alone, just let us know. I know you’re a lot more introverted than I am. If you ever want Yarrow to leave you alone, just tell him to go away. He’s smart.”

Caleb only nodded, “You’re too kind to me.”

The door opened then and Yasha came in. Molly let out a breath he didn’t know he’d been holding, relieved to be with someone who knew at least vaguely what they were doing. She said nothing at first, just moving over to Caleb and picking him up into a bone crushing hug. “Beau told me. I’m so sorry, Caleb.”

The wizard took a shaky breath but returned the hug, patting her awkwardly on the back a few times before she released him. “Do you want to talk about it?” she asked softly.

“I shouldn’t stay.”

That put the lump back in Molly’s throat. As the emptiness faded from Caleb’s eyes, the panic that Molly had seen in old photos of Caleb on Nott’s instagram had returned.

Yasha’s jaw clicked. “Like hell. You’re my friend. You’re Molly’s friend. We want you here. You’re safe here.”

When she told him he was safe, his eyes flitted down. He didn’t believe her.


	27. Fear

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fear, escape routes, negative thought patterns, anxiety, spiraling......

### Chapter 27: Fear

Every moment that Caleb stayed here, he was endangering both Mollymauk and Yasha’s lives.

Selfish, horrible creature that he was, he didn’t want to leave.

This life he’d built here was so much better than anything he could have ever dreamed of as he was fleeing from Rexxentrum. Being able to enjoy all of the wonderful friendships he’d had was a blessing he didn’t deserve. Caleb wasn’t supposed to get blessings.

Bren didn’t get blessings because all the gods should have abandoned him years ago.

Proof of that statement was in the fact that his apartment was currently on fire. His second home taken by flames, taken by Ikithon.

It had to be Ikithon. Why else would this happen to him? 

How on Earth was he supposed to believe that this was a coincidence? Just an accident, that was what they told everyone last time too. He remembered people trying to convince him of that in the Sanitorium. They twisted his memories, made him forget chunks of time, but the amount of time he spent dwelling on the topic left him knowing exactly what crimes he’d committed, even as the details got muddled.

He was weak.

He had always been weak.

He hadn’t been able to stand the teachings from Master Ikithon, and he had been punished for it.

He hadn’t been strong enough to live without his friends, and now he was being punished for that too.

He was even weaker physically than normal, since his bruising hadn’t quite healed yet. The incident at the graveyard seemed like years ago, but it was only about a week.

Molly was hovering, getting everything he could think of out for Caleb. Pacing, Caleb watched as Molly got him a few sets of clothes, some toiletries, sheets for the pullout bed, everything. Molly, who had been endlessly kind to him. Molly who had spent the four years of his waking life trying to be happy and bring happiness to others. Molly who didn’t even know Caleb’s real fucking _name_.

He had to get out of there. Caleb had no right to endanger his friends this way.

The next time Molly left the room, Caleb would leave.

He had to.

It was ridiculously selfish not to.

He would walk outside, maybe grab the toothbrush Molly had left out first, find an alleyway and use the teleportation circle he really hoped led to a place in Tal’Dorei. The merchant he’d done a favor for seemed to be truthful about it, and his identify spell hadn’t shown any red flags.

Caleb would start over. He would have to pick a new name, though he’d gotten attached to Caleb Widogast. Caleb Widogast was a man with friends. Caleb Widogast was a man who had something to live for.

This level of attachment had always been stupid. He knew that.

He slipped the toothbrush in the pocket of his coat and watched Molly leave to grab extra pillows off his bed.

Caleb didn’t deserve that.

He slipped out the front door, slinking towards the elevator. Leaning up against the wall by the sliding doors, Yasha was staring at him, with an excited Yarrow wagging his tail after a walk.

He swallowed, staring back. He hadn’t even heard her leave the apartment in his frantic pacing.

Spells raced through his mind. He could turn himself invisible and hope to sneak by her. If he could sneak invisible into the stairwell he could polymorph into a bird and still be able to teleport himself away from the roof. Or he could shrink himself down and bolt for the elevator. That wouldn’t work, she would make it in before the doors closed. A polymorphed bird would be the best bet, since he could fly out of her reach.

“Don’t run.”

The lump in his throat wouldn’t go down. “You don’t understand.”

“Obann might be dead, but don’t tell me I don’t understand.” Yasha’s face was emotionless, but he could hear the hurt behind the words.

He took a shaky breath. “Wouldn’t you leave? If everyone you loved was in danger?”

“You don’t even know it’s him. Beau said it was the earthquake.”

Staring at the floor, at his shoes that still had holes in them, he didn’t answer. He would need to replace them soon, if he was going to sleep on the street for the foreseeable future.

Yasha stepped forward, putting a hand awkwardly on his shoulder. “If it was him, wouldn’t he have made sure that someone got hurt?”

That… made a lot of sense.

“I… Most likely,” he whispered.

“So you agree this was probably an accident? That if he was here, we’d all be dead and he’d show up to take credit?”

Caleb stared at his shoes. Maybe he could duct tape them for the time being. “I should still leave.”

“You have no more reason to leave now than you did yesterday.”

“I should have gone yesterday. I should have gone _years_ ago. I never should have stayed this long,” he mumbled.

“Do you regret it?” Yasha asked, but she was no longer looking at him. She was looking past him, back at the apartment, like she heard something he didn’t.

“No. Not a moment of it.”

“Would you regret leaving?”

“Every day.”

“Then get your ass back inside, and stop trying to make yourself more miserable.”

“I don’t have to try.”

“I know, Caleb,” Yasha said, squeezing his shoulder firmly. A motion of camaraderie in misery.

Caleb took a deep breath that shook far more than he liked, and he half turned back to the apartment. Mollymauk stood in the doorway, a pained expression on his face. “Are… are you leaving?”

One more deep breath.

Yasha leaned down and whispered in his ear, “Remember how I said I would break you in half and have Jester put you back together again? That still applies, even if I have to drag you back from Tal’Dorei or Xhorhas myself.” He remembered vividly what she had told him about hurting Molly.

Nails bit into his palms as he clenched his hands into fists. He was being irrational. He knew that, though he couldn’t still the thrumming of his heart, beating out of his chest like a hummingbird. “I’m not leaving tonight,” he said. That much, at least, he could promise.

Molly nodded, schooling his face into a more neutral expression, though Caleb could still see the pain underneath. He hated himself for that. He hated himself for many things. Molly said, “We can work with that.”

Yasha nodded as well, guiding Caleb back into the apartment.

He allowed them to lead him to the pull out couch, now done up like a bed. Molly handed him a set of night clothes and told him to get changed, then grabbed his laptop to pull up _The Great Marquesian Baking Show_ while Yasha disappeared into the kitchenette. He heard Molly asking Yasha in a whisper if he would be able to teleport from the bathroom.

She said it was too small, not enough room for the chalk circle.

He could still polymorph into a bird and fly out the small window. But he had promised.

Caleb’s face in the bathroom mirror stared back at him. Taunting, far too familiar. Far too recognizable.

Perhaps he would grow out his beard. That might help a little.

It’s not like he had a razor anymore anyways.

Padding back out to the living room in sock feet, he let Yasha point him into his place on the couch next to Molly and took the cup of hot cocoa forced into his hands. Yasha crawled into the bed beside them, smushing Caleb into the middle and effectively trapping him between two very warm individuals.

The pressure was nice, and the hot mug in his hands was grounding.

Yasha knew what she was doing. She’d been learning from Pumat even longer than Caleb, and she was getting better every day. Her relationship with Beau was a testament to that.

She knew that she deserved some happiness.

Caleb never had any hope of that.

But for now, the pressure against either arm was nice. It was nice when Molly got sleepy and cuddly and ended up with his head resting on Caleb’s chest. It was nice when Yasha shifted and put an arm around his shoulders.

His friends were safe. Some of his dearest friends were here, worried about him, even if he didn’t deserve it.

Molly fished out Caleb’s phone and handed it to him at some point, allowing him to see texts from Nott and Jester. They weren’t expressing their worry, just condolences and saying how much they loved him. Jester wanted to take him clothes shopping tomorrow before her party this weekend, and she had also sent a bunch of videos of cute kittens. Nott was telling him about the extra boxes of his stuff she had stashed at her place. Some old clothes and magical paraphernalia he’d acquired at their old apartment together.

Even the others had texted. Fjord sent a message of his condolences and offered to take more shifts at the bookstore until Caleb got back on his feet. Caduceus sent a picture of a new sweater he’d started knitting for the wizard, and a special blend of tea he wanted to drop off soon. After a while, Beau texted too, saying she was safe and staying with Jester for the time being, and she’d drop all his research off at the bookstore tomorrow.

Beau he had the wherewithal to text back. He made sure she was okay, that she had gotten her own goods out too. They were like minded in not being very attached to material things. All her notes, gym clothes, and other valuables were in a duffle bag she kept by the door.

She sent pictures of all the books she grabbed, wanting to reassure him that none were left behind. As soon as he saw the research notes for Nott, he found himself able to breathe just a little easier. His notes were safe. He could still help Nott.

Everyone was safe. Everyone was safe and he wasn’t alone.

He had to stay to help Nott, at the very least. He owed her that.

Molly was practically purring on his chest, eyes closed and tail wrapped around Caleb’s ankle under the pile of blankets. It might have been too intimate, but Yasha being there made the contact seem very platonic and extremely welcome.

Of course Yasha needed to go to bed earlier than either of them, slipping off with a firm pat to Caleb’s shoulder. “We’ll leave you to sleep,” she said, moving to pick up Molly and take him to his bedroom.

“I’ll stay ‘til the end of the episode, Yash,” Molly mumbled with a yawn.

She shrugged, “Have fun watching through your eyelids.”

Molly curled closer to Caleb, nuzzling gently into him. Caleb stayed silent. He didn’t really have anything to say.

“Will you be alright on your own?” Molly asked softly.

Caleb stared up at the ceiling. He didn’t want Molly to have to deal with his nightmares. Twice in one month was too much. The first one was already more than he deserved. “I’ll be fine.” Not that he was fine now, but he was sure he would be. Someday.

“Okay. I should probably go to bed before I fall asleep on you. You’re too comfortable.” Molly sat up and rubbed his eyes.

Caleb couldn’t ask him to stay. He already didn’t deserve how kind they’d been to him tonight. He couldn’t trouble Molly any longer. Especially not if he was thinking of leaving after he got Nott his notes. This would only make it more painful when he did.

“Your CDs,” Caleb mumbled, realizing they would be a casualty of the fire.

“I’ll buy more.” Molly shrugged.

Caleb frowned at his lap. “But your notes.”

“I’ll write them again, Caleb. I don’t mind.” Molly squeezed his shoulder. “Pass me your phone?”

Caleb handed over the phone, still confused. Molly typed in something, pulling up an app Caleb never used. “I signed into my account for you. I’ve got all the albums on there.”

Staring at the phone, he saw all the albums that Molly had loaned him, ready to be played.

“Danke, Molly.”

Molly yawned again, giving a small wave. “Get some sleep, Caleb. You’ll still be here when I wake up?”

“Promise.”


	28. Brimstone and Tea with Lemon

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's backstory time!!

### Chapter 28: Brimstone and Tea with Lemon

Molly could hear Caleb in the living room. He’d left his door open tonight in the hopes that he would hear if Caleb tried to leave again, though he wanted to believe the promise. It was a strange sound, unlike the quiet Zemnian mumblings Molly was enamored with that Caleb made when he was alone and thinking too hard. He sounded panicked. So much so that it dragged Molly out of his hazy, sleep induced stupor and had him padding down the hallway.

The redhead was tangled in the sheet and blanket on the pullout couch, whimpering slightly as tremors shook through him, though he appeared to still be asleep.

“Caleb?” Molly asked softly, not wanting to spook him. He knew how disorienting it could be to be woken up during a nightmare.

He saw tears streaming down Caleb’s face and the man turned to him, eyes now open and full of terror. His lower lip trembled as a bit of recognition crossed his face. “Hol sie raus,” he said, near desperately, holding his arms out to Molly, palms up. “Bitte, es tut weh. Hol sie raus.”

Molly slowly took Caleb’s hands in his, confused but seeing new bright pink scratches over the scars. “Caleb, it’s Molly. Can you say that again in Common, please? Or Infernal?”

“Hol sie raus, take them out, take them out,” Caleb began shaking harder and Molly was at a loss, just cradling him to his chest.

“You’re okay. There’s nothing there, Caleb.” He could feel tears streaming down his chest. Caleb curled up a little, practically in his lap, staring down at his forearms.

“They’re out?”

“Yes, there’s nothing there. There’s nothing hurting you,” Molly murmured, feeling a little better as Caleb’s breathing at least slowed a little bit.

Caleb was still staring down though. “Nothing there… No crystals… Do you have a healing potion?”

“No, really, Caleb, you’re okay,” Molly started, confused as Caleb began to pull away.

“Ah… I can stop the bleeding. I can show him I’m not weak anymore,” he said, a hollow look in his eye as his palm erupted in flame.

As he moved to press the flame into his forearm, Molly lost all control of his body as he frantically tried to keep Caleb from burning himself. He grabbed Caleb’s arms and pinned them above his head, over the edge of the sofa bed, effectively straddling him. “Caleb, what the fuck?” Molly’s voice shook despite himself as the flames illuminated the wizard’s hair in fiery reds. His eyes were empty. Way too empty.

Empty, empty, empty.

Molly wasn’t sure he could breathe without sobbing. It was like looking in a mirror to his past.

Caleb frowned, blinking a few times before looking up at him. “Molly?”

Molly nodded frantically, beyond relief. “I’m right here with you. You recognize me?” He had to remind himself to breathe. Caleb was still in there. He was right there. He was fine. Not fine, really, but not empty.

“Ja. Molly,” he said, twisting gently underneath him, “was… what happened?”

“Apologies for pinning you down, but you tried to set yourself on fire. And I don’t think you’re resistant like me.” Molly wasn’t new to the position, but at least when he’d been in it in the past at least there was some discussion and boundaries set beforehand. And his voice certainly didn’t shake this much. “I’d get up, or at least establish some safewords, but I don’t trust you not to try again yet.”

“Where are we?” he asked, looking utterly confused. The flame in his palm flickered out and they were cast into darkness.

A lightbulb clicked in Molly’s head. The grounding stuff Caleb had done with him during the cave in. He could do this. He could help this time.

“We’re in the living room of me and Yasha’s apartment. You’re safe. If anyone tried to hurt you here they’d have me and Yasha to deal with.” Molly shifted slightly, not joking about that in the slightest.

Caleb’s eyes went wide, panicked but not empty. “The fire… He did it again. My necklace. Is it still there?”

Molly frowned, switching to hold Caleb’s wrists with one hand. “This one? Yeah, you’ve still got it.”

“Gut… He can’t see me.” He deflated a bit, taking a shaky breath.

“No one can see you but me,” Molly said. “Now, do you want to breathe with me? I can’t count in Zemnian, but I can still walk you through it.”

Caleb nodded, falling into the rhythm of it all and taking a few deeper breaths before mumbling, “Something I can see… It’s dark. I can see your eyes I think.”

“Something you can feel?”

“Your legs,” Caleb mumbled, a light flush coming to his cheeks as he started to fully realize their position. That wasn’t something to focus on at the moment, though Molly’s body protested that fact. His brain was definitely not on the same wavelength. Seeing Caleb empty… He didn’t even want to think about it.

“Something you can smell?” Molly asked, wondering if it was safe to unpin the wizard yet. He’d finish the grounding first.

Caleb frowned, taking in another deep breath. “I… I’m not sure what you smell like. Is it incense? Perfume?”

Molly nodded, “Probably both, honestly. Now something you can hear. You hear my voice, right? And you know who I am?”

“You are Mollymauk Tealeaf. I’m in your apartment. And you are very kind for keeping me from doing anything rash. I’m very sorry for all the trouble,” Caleb said softly, staring right up at him in the dark. It was odd to think that Caleb couldn’t really see him. Molly was so used to darkvision, and Caleb avoiding his gaze.

“Please don’t try to apologize for having a flashback after your goddamn apartment burned down,” Molly grumbled, moving to Caleb’s side. “I’m going to let your wrists go now, as long as you think you’re okay?”

“Ja, I’m okay. I think.” Caleb’s voice was still timid, but it sounded much more like himself.

Molly raked a hand through his hair, scratching the base of his horns. “We didn’t do taste. Do you have those lemon things? Or do you want tea? Yasha has some sleepytime stuff from Caduceus; I can make that.”

“Can I come with you?” he asked quietly.

“Of course.” Molly helped him up and flicked on a small lamp before heading to the kitchen and putting on the kettle. “Did I do the grounding thing okay?”

Caleb nodded. “You’re wonderful. I should go.”

Molly’s heart clenched. “I’m not letting you leave in the middle of the night. You don’t even own your own damn shampoo.”

“It wouldn’t be the first time.” Caleb stared at the floor. His face was tear stained and he looked out of place in Yasha’s old tank top and Molly’s sun and moon sweatpants. Hopefully he would let Jester take him clothes shopping tomorrow while Molly had to work. Someone needed to keep an eye on him. The groupchat of their friends would come in handy again.

Molly sighed softly, unable to formulate the words for how much it would hurt if Caleb just left. “Where the fuck would you go, Caleb?”

“Further away.”

“That’s ridiculous.” He snorted.

“I’ve been running for nine years, Molly. I just haven’t gotten far enough away.” Nine years. Nine years this had tortured Caleb. Molly’s stomach churned.

The tiefling turned away from the kettle where it screamed on the stove. “I hate to tell you this, but unless you plan to run straight into the Lucidien Ocean, fire can still find you.”

“It is true I have a… a checkered past with flame, with fire. But the fire is inside me,” Caleb stared down at his hands. “I know I can’t outrun that. But I can outrun him. I have to.”

“Who?” Molly finally snapped, “Who the fuck is this that you think we can’t protect you from? Have you _seen_ Yasha’s sword? Or even hand to hand in the fighting pits? Or even _you_ in the graveyard! I’ll go get my scimitars and you'll be safe with us.”

"He could kill me in a heartbeat. He doesn't want that. He wants me broken, beaten, obedient and cruel. Just as cruel as he is." Caleb looked up at Molly and with genuine fear mumbled, “He took everything I loved from me, and I broke. He'll come do it again." He began scratching at the bandages again. "Selfish, selfish, I've been so selfish. But gods I've enjoyed your friendship. Yours, Nott’s, Jester’s, Beau’s, Caduceus', Yasha’s, even Fjord’s. I can't let him hurt you." Caleb looked terrified, knees wobbling until he gave up and just sank to the kitchen floor.

Molly finally pulled the kettle off, putting in the teabags before he got up the courage to ask, "Will you tell me who? Or what happened?"

Caleb sighed, shaky and broken, but began speaking as though he had rehearsed it. "My name… was Bren Aldric Ermendrud. I grew up in a small town outside of Rexxentrum called Blumenthal. My mother's name was Una. My father's name was Leofric. Everyone was very excited about me when I was young. I was bright and confident. People used to say that I glided through life and everything just worked for me. As I got older, it became clear that I had a knack for the arcane. Everyone talked about this Soltryce Academy, maybe I would go there someday. The way they do things at that Academy, they don't take all-comers, they look for the diamond in the rough and every couple of years they find one. But when I was a young man, adolescent, really, they found three of us. Another boy and a girl, and we were accepted.”

He sighed softly, accepting the teacup Molly passed to him and stared into it, near expressionless. “We went there, to the Soltryce Academy. I studied for a year. I worked so hard. It came easier to me than the other two, but they were also very accomplished. There were other students from other parts of the Empire there, and a little over a year of learning all they had to impart, I met a man named Trent Ikithon. He became our teacher.” His voice trembled at the name. Molly could guess that was “him.”

Caleb blinked and silent tears began streaming down his face. He switched to hold the teacup in one hand as he scratched at his tangled bandages. “After a year of studying in the main school, Trent handpicked all three of us again, and we left the school proper and went with him to a home out in the countryside where he trained us. It was a good time. We believed in the Empire, we were going to keep it strong. He was cruel. He hurt us a lot. Made us go through extreme circumstances, but we got strong.”

Molly’s stomach turned as he thought of all the scars on Caleb’s arms underneath the bandages. _Hol sie raus. Take them out._ He took a sip of the tea and hoped it would settle his churning gut.

“We rose through the ranks and it was the Empire over all, and eventually, he wanted to test our allegiance, so strangers were brought in-- traitors. Disgusting people, _traitors_ to this empire, and we killed them.” His voice started shaking again, and Molly caught his hand so he would stop scratching. At this rate he was going to draw blood.

Caleb met his gaze as if he’d forgotten Molly was in the room with him. “I went on a trip home and visited my parents and when I was there, in the middle of the night, I awoke and overheard them talking, and went to the stair and listened to them talk about revolution and tearing the Empire down, and I felt disgraced and shame for my family. My mother and my father, who were so wonderful to me when I was a child, and were so happy for me to go to the Academy and believed in the Empire _so much._ I went back to the school and when the three of us were summoned and told what was expected of us, I knew what had to be done.”

Molly could see where it was going, his stomach doing anything but settling.

“We went to this other boy's home first, Eadwulf, and we stood by as he killed his parents. We went to Astrid’s house, and had dinner with them, and she poisoned them. Then we went to my home and we grabbed a horse cart, and in the middle of the night, placed it against the door to the home and I set it on fire.”

The tears streamed freely down his face at that point, eyes hollow as he stared into the teacup in his lap. “It didn't exactly go according to Ikithon’s plan because as soon as I heard my mother and father screaming inside… I was so sure… until I wasn't, and I broke a bit.

“I went to an asylum for a number of years. I broke. I don't remember so well what happened to me there. It was quite a number of years. Years later, a woman was there, and she, another patient, put hands on me, and she took the clouds away. She took it all away, and not just my madness, but the fake memories that Ikithon put in my head of my parents being traitors.”

“Fake memories?” Molly asked quietly, still trying to process everything out of Caleb’s mouth.

He nodded. “Powerful arcane users can modify your memory. Implant information, change events, whatever they want. I… I know that in that moment I wasn’t given all the proper information. I was lied to and gaslighted, but gods, I still did it. I’m still a disgusting person.” Caleb knew all the words that they used in therapy, but there was only so much that could do. The guilt had to be eating him alive.

Molly stared into his teacup for a minute before putting it down more forcefully than really necessary. Whoever Trent Ikithon was, Molly wanted to kill him. He could picture Caleb, young, bright, beautiful, and eager to learn. Twisted and bent and broken until he lay shattered like this on Molly's kitchen floor. 

It was a lot. Molly wasn’t sure exactly how to process everything that was just said to him, but he knew that it didn’t really change how he felt about Caleb in the end. He needed to take some time to deal with all that, but that could be done later.

For now… 

“Can I hug you?” he asked, moving closer to Caleb.

“Why would you…?” Caleb looked up at him, bewildered and still tear stained.

Molly shook his head. “Yes or no?”

“Ja.”

And then Molly took Caleb’s teacup and put it on the counter, bringing him into a hug that was near crushing. Tentatively, slowly, Caleb raised his arms and hugged back just as tightly.


	29. Safe

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> hugs and realizations

### Chapter 29: Safe

Molly was hugging him. Molly was here and warm and knew everything and he was hugging Caleb like his life depended on it.

Caleb couldn’t help but to bury his face in the crook of Molly’s neck, the only place to completely avoid the horns, and let the tears flow down freely. The mumbled apologies for getting Molly’s shoulder wet were swallowed by Caleb’s sobs and Molly’s denial of anything being wrong, so he just stopped trying to talk.

He rubbed gentle circles into Caleb’s back, mumbling soft nothings in Infernal in his ear. Caleb only understood every few words, but the sound was gentle and grounding. He was speaking too quickly, and much too informally for Caleb to properly understand. It reminded him of translating the Infernal CDs to help him sleep and he tried to focus on the words he did know.

_Okay._

_Alright._

_Sweet._

_Friends._

_Family._

_Care._

_Home._

_Mine._

_Soft._

He hadn’t been paying attention to the time since he woke up, so he had no idea how long they stayed like that.

But the thought that Molly could know everything, the whole story, and still want him to stay, still want to hug him…

Caleb thought he could combust on the spot.

He had been terrified to tell Nott and Beau. Telling Yasha was easier since he already knew she’d been through something similar. Telling Jester was awful, mostly because she’d reacted just like this. No hesitation, not even a flinch.

Caleb didn’t understand it. He was a terrible person, and yet these lovely people kept showing up in his life.

Spectacular people who knew everything and still wanted to be his friend.

Molly rubbed his back, let him cry into his bare shoulder like Caleb was the only thing that mattered in the world. It was overwhelming. Caleb felt the urge to leave again, to bolt away from this kind of affection, but it was hard to think of anything beyond this moment.

Eventually he pulled back to wipe his face clear, starting to feel like there were no more tears to shed. Molly kept an arm around Caleb’s shoulders, grabbing the tea he’d made earlier and passing it to him. “I put lemon in it. Not a gross amount, but it’s something,” Molly said, soft and gentle.

Sipping it slowly, Caleb let the flavor wash the ash and blood away from his tongue. Something herbal, he thought. Chamomile, perhaps, though he wasn’t as good with tea as Caduceus. There was a healthy dose of lemon juice and honey in the concoction as well.

It was warm and grounding, but nothing was more grounding than the warm purple, tattooed arm still wrapped around his shoulders. It felt nearly hot to the touch. It looked as wonderfully ostentatious as ever. Caleb could even smell the faint scent of the perfume and incense. Mollumauk was a grounding experience all in himself.

“You mind if I say something?” Molly said after a minute.

Caleb shook his head, not trusting his voice. He didn’t mind.

“I know you’ve been through hell and back, but I think you’re a lovely person. I think it’s amazing that you’ve been able to move on from that and still become a wonderful friend. For me, for Nott, Jester, Yasha, Beau, everyone.” Molly was staring at his own teacup, speaking slowly and picking each word with care.

Biting his lip, Caleb shook his head again. He didn’t deserve the kind words. He didn’t deserve Molly’s calming touch.

“I’m a terrible person.” His voice was haggard, raw from the tears. He was surprised there was any sound at all, but the honey had coated his throat enough to be heard.

“No, you’re not.” Molly said simply.

Caleb shook his head again, feeling his brain shut down Molly’s denial. It was a fact. He knew he was an awful person like he knew he had red hair. “Mollymauk, I’m a garbage person. No matter what I do I’ll never make up for what I’ve done. I’ve got warrants out for my arrest in more places than I can remember. Which is saying something, with my memory. I tortured people, I murdered people, I murdered my fucking family. I’m not a good person.”

“Did you ever want to do any of that?”

“Was?” The Zemnian slipped out in his surprise.

Molly still wasn’t looking at him, but his voice was calm. “Did you actually want to do any of those things. If you could have been doing something else, would you have been?”

“I thought I was doing right by the Empire. I thought it was necessary.”

“That’s not answering the question,” Molly pointed out.

“I could have walked away at any point. I still did it all.”

Molly shook his head. “That’s still not answering the question.”

“I don’t know. I used to think I did. I certainly regret it,” he finally said, though his voice was hollow.

“That’s enough for me.”

_“Was?”_

“‘I’m a firm believer in second chances.’ Isn’t that something you told me once? I have to believe in second chances. That’s my entire life, a second chance.” Molly’s arm was still around his shoulder.

Caleb finished the last of his tea, unable to think of anything else to say. Eventually, a few minutes later, he put the feelings into words, “You have amnesia. I am a murderer.”

“For all I know, whoever used to control this body was a murderer too. I just have to accept that and move on. You really believe that I can’t accept the fact that you did some horrible things while brainwashed? You know Yasha is my best friend, right?” Molly was staring deep into his own teacup, voice soft and devoid of most of its normal teasing qualities.

Caleb said nothing so Molly went on, “All we can really do is accept that the past is the past, and try to do better. We can leave each place better than we found it.”

“Leaving places better than you found them,” Caleb murmured, staring into his own empty teacup.

Molly said, “Places, people, things… It’s all we can do, yeah?”

Caleb nodded slowly, wondering how odd they looked. He certainly felt odd, sitting on the cold linoleum of Molly and Yasha’s kitchenette, staring into a garishly hot pink floral teacup. Probably slightly less strange than the image he’d woken up to, with Molly shirtless, straddling him and only illuminated in the flickering firelight in Caleb’s hands. It was an image Caleb might have recalled favorably if it was created during any other circumstances.

His memory was perfect, and he finally realized that Molly had talked about establishing safewords while straddling him. That wasn’t exactly language you picked up at boarding school or church. A deep, hidden part of Caleb wanted to explore that more. He could have guessed the tiefling had a propensity for more than vanilla, but having it confirmed was something else for his imagination.

Those weren’t feelings or thoughts that Caleb allowed himself to have. Not with his crush on Jester, and certainly not now with Mollymauk. He was barely coming to terms with the fact that he might deserve Molly’s friendship, he certainly couldn’t believe he deserved anything beyond that. Molly had accepted him for who he was without a second glance and Caleb would be eternally grateful. He could never ask for more beyond that.

Molly let the silence hang for a while, inspecting his tea leaves.

“You ever get your tea leaves read?”

“Nein.”

Molly’s expression screwed up into one of intense focus as he brought his cup further into the light. A completely unnecessary action with darkvision. “Well, there’s no evil people in my future, if you were wondering. Hopefully that doesn’t mean that you’re just backing out on your promise.”

Caleb snorted and Molly extended a hand for his teacup. He knew it would be better to do so, to leave and never look back. To give up on Caleb Widogast like he’d given up on Bren. To abandon the warmth that Molly brought to his chest.

“Let me read yours too,” Molly said, a hint of the teasing smirk back on his lips.

Caleb handed the cup over without question.

“See,” Molly grinned, “just like I thought.”

Caleb only lifted a brow, trying to ignore the smile pulling at his lips. He didn’t deserve this. He could never deserve this.

“There’s totally a hot tiefling in your future. Can’t exactly tell if it’s me or Jester, but that means you stay,” Molly said definitively.

Sighing softly, Caleb peered inside the teacup. “There is nothing there but black dots.”

“Let your eyes go out of focus a bit. See that part at the top? Those swirls? Totally horns.”

Caleb did as Molly asked, letting his vision blur slightly until the horns came into view. A simple way of looking for what you wanted to find, and a question of self fulfilling prophecy. Meaningless, if he chose to run. “How do you know I will not just find another tiefling somewhere?”

“Well, I know the only really important tieflings to you are me and Jester, I hope. Unless you’ve been hiding more from us all.” Molly winked at him, and despite everything, Caleb felt his cheeks heat up.

This was dangerous.

These were emotions he shouldn’t be entertaining, much less pursuing. It had slowly started to dawn on him that when he and Mollymauk were in public, people assumed they were dating. The more frightening realization was that he didn’t care. He didn’t mind that assumption.

That level of attachment was terrifying. That kind of attachment was the worst kind of weakness. Of course he loved his friends dearly, all of them, and he would go to the ends of the earth for them.

This felt different, even more so than with Jester, and that alone was terrifying.

He was petrified.

This was the kind of attachment that got used against you. That got you killed. Or worse, that would get him to break again.

Caleb knew in that moment that he wouldn’t leave. He would take the calculated risk of staying, to stay with his friends, with Mollymauk. He was selfish and he didn’t want to lose their company, especially if this sincerely was an accident.

For that small chance, he would stay. It was incredibly selfish, but he would stay.

Mollymauk took his hand and helped him up, leading him back into the living room and lying down with him on the pullout bed. “I’m going to stay,” he said softly, allowing Caleb the chance to say no, but clearly indicating he wanted to keep an eye on the situation.

And Caleb wanted him to stay.

He sat on the edge of the bed, trying to figure out what was the rational option. Caleb honestly couldn’t tell if it was an accident yet. Maybe he could talk to the firefighters. Make sure everyone was safe.

After setting up the music again, Molly fixed the tangled mess Caleb had made of the bed earlier in his frantic nightmare, slipping under. He lifted the corner of the blankets for Caleb to move in beside him. Tentatively Molly wrapped an arm around him, kissing him gently on the forehead. “Is this okay?”

Caleb nodded, resisting the urge to look down and instead looked Molly in the eye. “I’d like to promise you something. Even if it doesn’t mean much to you.”

Molly cocked his head, but let Caleb continue.

“If I decide that I need to leave, I’ll tell you first. My word might not be worth much of anything, but it is yours.” _It’s all yours._ Everything Caleb had. Everything Caleb would ever have to offer.

“You know I’ll try and talk you out of it,” Molly said, rubbing a small idle circle on the small of his back.

Caleb met his red eyes in the dim light of the living room. “Maybe I want you to.”

Maybe he wanted many things that he couldn’t say. Maybe he wanted to stay being held by Molly, staring in his eyes until he passed out from exhaustion, relishing in the touch. Maybe he wanted more than being held. Maybe he wanted to run his hands over Molly’s tattoos and lose himself in this feeling he hadn’t felt since Astrid. Maybe he wanted to close the small gap between the two of them in the bed and kiss Molly until he couldn’t breathe. Maybe he wanted to stay forever, no matter the cost, so long as he was wanted right back.

Maybe it would end poorly.

But… maybe, if Molly wanted him here, he could stay.

With that heartbreaking grin, Molly answered, “Then I’ll try my damnedest to keep you where you belong.”


	30. Summer's Dance and Find Familiar

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The long awaited chapter (for like five people lol)! Little time skip and the culmination of fantasy secret santa...

### Chapter 30: Summer’s Dance and Find Familiar

“Beau, holy fuck,” Molly stared wide eyed at the jeweled scimitar he had lamented the loss of earlier that week at _The Fletching and Moondrop Emporium of Curiosities._ “This thing cost a fortune; I should know, I put the price tag on it.”

She smirked. “Your bosses cut me a deal when I told them who it was for. They told me to tell you not to expect anything from either of them this year though. And my dad sent me my annual ‘here’s some gold, please don’t come home’ bag of coin for Winter’s Crest. I’m flush.” Her smug expression faltered a bit as she raked a hand through her hair. “Also I uh… I don’t know that much about you beyond swords, drugs, and alcohol.”

Molly snorted. “Honestly, not the worst impression I could give.”

“I mean I left out how much of an asshole you are on purpose. But yeah, it’s kind of an olive branch.”

Twisting the sword so it caught the light, Molly grinned at her. “A violent olive branch. Fitting for you. I can’t say I want to bond over Skein again anytime soon, but we should go grab a beer or something.”

Beau rolled her eyes but nodded, seeming satisfied and going to sit with Yasha as the aasimar tried to explain the various gym equipment while completely engulfed in the sweater Caduceus had knit for her, all black except for two white angel wings on the back, and little specks of white running through almost like lightning. It was a chunky knit, and absolutely something Molly would have stolen if Yasha hadn’t put it on immediately and not taken it off.

He could be patient. Or do the nice thing and ask Caduceus to make a commission for him. He was still deciding.

Nott and Caleb were hunched over his present to her, going over each page of meticulously handwritten notes in the corner of Jester’s living room. Jester had disappeared into the bathroom to play with the special tiefling makeup Nott had given her. They had released a new palette just for Winter’s Crest that was lots of icy blues and decorated with snowflakes. It was perfect for her.

Fjord was turning over the pendant to the Wildmother Jester had gotten him in his fingers, eyes still a bit wide and halfway towards teary just looking at the thing. Molly smiled at that. They would be sweet together, if he took this as a sign. Hopefully he wasn’t _that_ dense.

Caduceus’s easy grin was trained on Fjord’s present for the firbolg, a huge rolling shelf designed to hold plants and move them around to the perfect levels of sunlight. Molly knew Cad’s apartment didn’t need a single other plant, but Caduceus would always disagree. Soon his bedroom would look more like a jungle than anything else.

A room full of broken people finding comfort in each other. After the fire they’d taken care of Beau and Caleb. Obviously Caleb more so, but Beau had been treated to a Jester shopping spree of her own. Fjord had stepped up and taken half of Caleb’s shifts at the bookstore, especially since they found out he’d been doing overtime for the past four years without telling anyone. Nott had delivered a few boxes of Caleb’s belongings to their apartment and the bookstore that held some of his older books and belongings from when the two lived together.

Caduceus and Yasha had taken it upon themselves to insert themselves into Caleb’s routine, each one taking a day that Caleb now had off to recover from everything. Caduceus was the one to take Caleb out of the house, replacing things that the wizard forgot normal people usually had, like his own shampoo. Though Molly had enjoyed Caleb walking around with his hair smelling like him a bit too much. Yasha just stretched their normal lunch dates longer, driving him to one on one sessions with Pumat back uptown. Caleb always came back drained, but he seemed like he was getting better every day.

Molly had “found” an unlimited subway card for Caleb so he didn’t have to worry about paying for rides to work when he was trying to replace everything he owned. But Caleb was somehow the least materialistic person Molly had ever met. Well, except for books, which were all safe in the man’s study, and magic items, which Molly had now learned didn’t burn.

Everyone had stepped up, and the group was starting to feel like a family. Molly never wanted it to end.

Nott finally nudged Caleb over to Molly, since he was the only one without a present and Molly was the only one still holding a wrapped gift. The book was delicate, hard to wrap, but Molly had done his best to hide the shoddy job with a massive red bow. He had considered glitter, but figured it would never come out of the already fragile pages.

“I don’t need to interrupt you two, if you’re still talking,” Molly said, more than content to see the spark of passion in Caleb’s eyes as they talked about spells from afar. It was strange that he still wanted to do nothing more than just watch the wizard. They were still practically roommates, though to Molly’s chagrin, they hadn’t found themselves in the same bed again. Molly would wake up and help Caleb with any nightmares, and to his surprise, Caleb seemed to be just as in tune with his night terrors. Even though he never thought he was that loud, there would come a soft knock on the open door and the welcome presence of a hug and lemon candies.

Now that Molly knew everything was going on, he felt a little better prepared to help. The nightmares were a little easier to deal with when he knew what to say, what Caleb was thinking. The first night after the apartment fire Caleb had disappeared until almost midnight, worrying him sick. But he had to trust that Caleb really would have told him if he was going to leave. He promised.

And he’d come back, just like he promised. Even though he looked horribly guilty when he walked in, avoiding any eye contact and going immediately to sleep. Even though he’d taken his toothbrush and a bar of soap from the closet with him. Even though Molly spent hours thinking he’d never see the wizard again, and never get a proper goodbye. Even though Molly had never quite felt a hollow like that in chest. Even though Yasa practically dragged Caleb to Pumat’s the next day.

He kept his promise.

Now Caleb shook his head, sitting beside Molly on the couch, “I could talk about research for weeks. I probably will. This whole thing was my idea in the first place, I shouldn’t hold everyone up.” It wasn’t a very good reason, since the only person who was waiting for him was Molly. And he’d have waited for Caleb for years. He was prepared for that.

Molly nodded, passing over the gift and trying to stop the pounding in his heart. He knew even if it wasn’t perfect, Caleb wouldn’t really care. Caleb was too kind to say anything even if he hated it. Still, part of him was regretting the choice, second guessing the entire thing. Even though the past week and a half were much better and Caleb seemed to be doing better himself, Molly really wanted this to be perfect.

Taking it carefully, Caleb peeled off the bow and started ripping off the shiny striped paper. 

Molly couldn’t stop from babbling as Caleb uncovered the delicate old book, beginning to flip through it. “Gustav helped me find it. I know it’s a little damaged, but he said it was still worth something. Sounded like it would have been worth more if it was in mint condition, so I hope there’s still something good in there,” Molly said, waiting cautiously for some sign on Caleb’s face that he’d done well or horribly.

He couldn’t read the expression at all as Caleb flipped through the book, but noted his hands were shaking. Whether that was from frustration about the water damage, or happiness, Molly couldn’t tell. At the edge of his seat, Molly felt like he might implode at any moment. “So? Is it any good? If it sucks I could always get you something else; I’m sure Gustav would take it back-”

“Molly,” Caleb said, sounding like he might cry, “please stop. Das ist… This is so wonderful.” His accent was thicker, and he still hadn’t lifted his eyes from the book. “It’s an old spellbook. From a relatively powerful caster.”

Then he stopped at a page near the beginning that looked almost immaculate. Molly could hear the small gasp sucked in from where he sat on the couch and moved closer to look over Caleb’s shoulder. He couldn’t stand sitting back anymore, even if the arcane symbols meant nothing to him. “A good one?”

And then he was being hugged. A tight, warm hug, soft as anything. “Danke, Molly. This is everything.”

His voice caught in his throat as he felt a distinctive damp spot form on his shoulder where Caleb had currently buried his face. “You’re more than welcome, dear. I’m just glad it’s worth something to you. I really couldn’t tell, but Nott said you’d like it.”

“I can bring him back,” Caleb mumbled into the crook of his neck, pulling back and wiping his eyes.

And there it was. That huge beaming smile that he saw on Caleb’s face the first day he met him. It was the same expression as when he’d found out Nott and Jester had set up an entire study for him.

The look was directed at him with full force, and Molly felt his heart skip a beat. He was in deep. It took a moment for him to even process what Caleb had said. “Bring who back?”

“Frumpkin. My familiar. My old spell book… I lost the spell. I haven’t been able to find it for years. I haven’t seen him in… in _years.”_ Caleb’s voice was hoarse, but the smile was still there as the tears continued to stream down his cheeks. Molly got the wherewithal to grab him a box of tissues and received a mumbled thanks in Zemnian. 

Caleb went on, speaking with that passionate spark in his eye he got whenever he spoke of something wonderfully arcane. “I might not even need to copy it over into my own book, since I’ve cast it before. Of course, I’ll need to wait for the shops to open. I don’t have the incense or charcoal or herbs for the spell. I haven’t needed them in ages. No one just carries around 10 gold worth of incense. Do you think any of them will be open tomorrow?”

Molly looked around at the rest of their friends, carefully enjoying their hand selected presents, and remembered how upset Caleb had been when he saw the old picture of Frumpkin a few weeks ago. “Come with me,” he said, making a split second decision. He never wanted that smile to leave Caleb’s face. He extended a hand for the wizard to take, feeling the intimacy of the moment though they were hugging just moments before.

To Molly’s delight, Caleb took his hand without hesitation. “Where are we going?”

“Not far, but you’ll need your coat.”

Feeling like a small child on Winter's Crest morning, an experience Molly never had, he practically dragged Caleb down the block to the _Emporium._ Fumbling with his key in one hand, he finally got the door open, enjoying the strange ethereal quality of the moment with Caleb alone in the shop with all the lights off. The salt lamps glowed lightly and the solar powered lights that hung in the windows cast the room in a strange glow.

“Incense, you said, right?”

“And charcoal and some herbs. I’ll look up which ones,” Caleb said, flipping open the book and squinting at it in the dim blue light coming in through the windows. Molly took in the look of him, serene and calm in the darkness, his cheeks and nose red from the cold though they were only outside a few minutes.

Shaking his head and trying to focus, Molly dragged out the whole box of extra incense from storage, not sure what was needed, along with a messy box of charcoal. “The herbs are hanging over there. They should all be labeled.” 

“I don’t suppose you have a brass brazier in here somewhere? I have one in my study across the street.” Caleb was talking over his shoulder as he picked out the certain herbs and the correct amount of incense and charcoal.

Molly frowned, but nodded, “I think so? It might not be brass, you’ll have to double check.”

“Gut, gut,” he said to himself, counting out the different bundles of herbs carefully. “Oh, scheiße, I left my coin purse across at Jester’s.”

Molly popped back to the front room holding the brazier. “No way, this is part of the present. I didn’t know that until now, but you can just thank me by letting me play with Frumpkin. If he likes me.”

The light in Caleb’s eyes shone with great emotion and another set of tears. “Mollymauk, that is too kind.”

“I’m a kind person,” he mumbled, kneeling down by Caleb on the floor with the brazier. “Now, show me how this works.”

Caleb assembled all the components in the brazier, reading from the book and mumbling arcane words. “Oh, should I get some matches?” Molly asked, moving to stand before he saw a blaze of flame.

Fire burned in Caleb’s palm, casting dancing shadows on the walls. Caleb stared at it a second too long. Molly couldn’t blame him, still not quite used to his own magic, even after four years. But he remembered everything Caleb had told him a few nights ago and he worried as the smile on Caleb’s face faltered a moment.

Before he could ask if the wizard was okay, the incense was burning.

As the embers flew up in the darkness, Molly was glad he didn’t turn on the lights. Caleb’s face illuminated in the fire, embers floating up as his hair began to dance in an unseen wind. Sitting next to him, Molly felt like he could reach out and touch the raw power surrounding the man.

He might have, if he wasn’t locked in place watching arcane words spill from Caleb’s lips, feeling the power reach out and tease the air around the two of them.

Mollymauk had never seen a happier cat. The surprised little “mmrp” the orange cat made when the spell finished and he plopped into Caleb’s lap only lasted a moment before he was practically hugging the man, nuzzling into the crook of his neck and purring so loudly Molly could hear it a mile away.

Caleb’s hands dropped to circle the cat, a beautiful bengal Molly noted, and completely broke down. At that point, Molly couldn’t just watch. Scooching around the brazier, he gently laid an arm over Caleb’s shoulders. “Is this okay? I take it, those are happy tears?” he murmured, relishing in the feeling as the wizard nodded and leaned into him, dropping his head to rest on Molly’s shoulder.

The cat looked up at Molly, bright amber eyes glowing in the dark just slightly. “Frumpkin,” Caleb said softly, “this wonderful person is Mollymauk. He helped me bring you back.”

“Hello, Frumpkin,” Molly said, grinning as the cat seemed to understand every word and begin to rub into his free hand, still purring up a storm. Maybe he did understand every word. He was a magic cat, after all. “It’s lovely to meet you.”

Caleb turned to look at Molly, their faces almost uncomfortably close. But it was comfortable. Too comfortable. Molly could feel the heat rise to his face and was once again glad they were fumbling about in the dark and humans didn’t have any darkvision. “Molly, I can never repay you.”

“You’re not supposed to, it’s a present,” Molly said, trying not to stare at the shape of the wizards lips and the freckles dusted over his nose. Instead Molly took his free hand away from Frumpkin, allowing the cat to get back to purring in Caleb’s lap, and gently brushed away the tears from his cheeks.

Caleb shook his head, "No, this book is incredibly rare."

"So are purple tieflings," Molly tried teasing, but it came out a little too soft, a little too gentle. His normal grin was lost in favor of a small smile that wouldn't leave his lips.

Yet again Caleb shook his head, "Nein, bitte, I just… You weren't even the recipient of my gift. Let me do something for you."

Molly swallowed, thinking only for a moment. "Take me out to dinner. Nowhere fancy, just somewhere fun. I really didn't spend that much money," he said, wondering if Caleb could hear him lying through his teeth. Gustav was letting him work it off instead, which was fine. He barely needed the job at the _Emporium_ anymore; the _Lavish Chateau_ paid well enough. He mostly did it because he’d be bored otherwise.

But if Caleb wanted to express gratitude, he wasn’t going to stop him.


	31. Frumpkin and Subsequent Surprises

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Caleb wants to repay Molly for access to the Find Familiar spell, but Frumpkin is priceless...

### Chapter 31: Frumpkin and Subsequent Surprises

Molly was lying about how much money he spent on Caleb's present. Caleb could tell that much. He couldn't tell how badly he was lying. This spellbook had to be worth well over a thousand gold in peak condition, and though many of the spells were water damaged, he knew he could work them out with enough time. It would still be worth every copper to Caleb.

Perhaps Molly was rich, like Jester. That wouldn't explain why he had two jobs. Of course he did seem constantly bored by almost any down time.

Maybe he really had gotten it from his friend who knew nothing about magic. Caleb almost felt bad for the man he’d never met. It felt like stealing. It felt like something he didn't deserve.

The thought popped into his head and not a second later did Frumpkin appear, hopping into the blanket covering his lap and beginning to make biscuits. Caleb suppressed another bout of tears. Although he was understanding in the beginning, Frumpkin still didn't really enjoy getting wet. Especially since it had already been a few days since his return.

Frumpkin was back and he hadn’t had a really bad nightmare since. Of course he could never escape the nightmare of his parent’s home burning, but he no longer dreamt of Ikithon. The crystals embedded in his skin, the experiments, the torture. Frumpkin’s purring body and Molly’s music lulled him to sleep each night. Frumpkin who knew everything about Caleb, down to his soul, and loved him anyways. Frumpkin who didn’t leave Caleb’s side for a solid 36 hours before going to inspect Molly’s apartment and investigate Yasha’s dog, Yarrow.

And Molly, who was always willing to sit with him when he had a nightmare, who seemed to know, even when Caleb was sure he wasn’t crying out in his sleep. Molly’s music and Frumpkin (and a few one on one sessions with Pumat, to be fair) had effectively brought him back to reality. Caleb wasn’t so delusional to think he was completely safe; that would be foolish. But he could stay with his friends. 

With Frumpkin by his side, he was able to believe he and his friends might be safe. He was able to believe he might need to stick around to work with Nott and Yussa to get her body back and repay some of the debt he owed to her in friendship. He could stay with Yasha and watch her new relationship with Beau. Not to offer advice, since neither of them were particularly good at that, but he could stay. He could stay and visit with Jester, listen to her gush about Fjord and be happy for her happiness, so well deserved. He could stay and enjoy Caduceus’s cooking and continue to help him enchant little globules of light to hang in his living room to help the plants grow.

He could stay and bask in the wonderful presence of Mollymauk Tealeaf.

It was helpful to get out of his head and have the purring lump make biscuits on his stomach. Especially since the last time Caleb’s stomach was much, much thinner. Now Molly had taken over for Beau on making sure he remembered to eat, and Frumpkin seemed very pleased.

Still, Caleb was unsure how to properly repay Molly. He almost wished he’d waited to take Molly to the circus so he could do that. Not that even that wonderful memory could compare to how Caleb felt about getting Frumpkin back.

Caleb would have gathered all the stars in the sky and presented them to Mollymauk on a silver platter, and it wouldn’t hold a candle to how he felt about Frumpkin. He could’ve pulled down the moon, or organized an audience with the Moonweaver herself and he might get about halfway there.

He would just have to start now and keep trying for as long as he could. 

The whole idea was difficult to achieve, since Mollymauk didn’t necessarily have nostalgia for anything like Caleb had for Frumpkin. Caleb had been away from Frumpkin for longer than Molly had had his memories. He talked with Yasha about everything, and he thought he had a few good ideas, but many of them were quite tricky.

Eventually he was able to call in a few favors, and had what he thought could be the perfect plan. He needed a good place to set everything up, but he ran the idea past Yasha again and thought everything would go rather smoothly. 

Somehow this felt different than their Infernal lessons. It felt closer to how he had stressed over preparing a picnic for Astrid, back when he was sixteen. 

More dangerous comparisons.

Thankfully, if Astrid was a wildfire, Mollymauk was a storm. Astrid burned bright and was beautiful, determined, and deadly. But Molly was a storm over land in drought. Dangerous when necessary, sure, but necessary himself and always leaving places better than he found them.

In the end, there truly was no comparison.

Pumat and Caduceus were doing their best to convince Caleb that he could enjoy this. That he could move beyond his guilt. And he was doing his best to try and believe them, even as every part of his being was insisting he didn’t deserve any of it.

“I thought this was supposed to be my present for getting you back Frumpkin,” Molly pouted as Caleb refused to tell him where they were going. “Why can’t I know where we’re going?”

“Because I enjoyed the last surprise, and I’ve been keeping it secret from you for days for a reason.” Caleb was taking him on a bit of a wild goose chase, just taking Molly to the closest place to draw a good teleportation circle near his apartment.

Molly pouted more, but there was a wicked gleam in his eye, “I suppose I do like surprises. If I guess right, will you tell me?”

“Sure, Mollymauk. Guess away.” Caleb tried to keep the smirk off his face, but wasn’t doing well.

The tiefling started asking different things rapid fire, all of them much smaller scale than Caleb had planned. “I thought we were going out to dinner. Is it lunch instead?”

“You’ll see,” Caleb said, finding the alleyway he had found earlier, pulling out his chalk.

Molly’s eyes widened the gleam only growing, “Where are we going?”

“That would ruin the surprise, Molly.”

Molly took his hand as the teleportation circle finished, and they were whisked away from the cold rainy season of Nicodranas back into tropical weather. Caleb pulled his haversack off and stuffed his coat and scarf inside, making sure he had his spell components strapped on his belt and that his book holsters were situated. “Can I take your coat?” he asked, looking up at Molly.

Staring starry eyed at the lush jungle they’d ended up in, Molly looked back at him, “Hm?”

Caleb words caught in his throat for a minute at how well Molly fit in with the landscape, the lush greens offsetting the lavender beautifully. “Your coat?”

“Oh,” he said, nodding and slipping it off his shoulders. Caleb noted Beau’s gift to the tiefling, the scimitar, hanging at his waist, flamboyant as ever. He’d fit right in here. “Thank you. This is… This is insane, Caleb.”

“You underestimate how much Frumpkin means to me.” Caleb shrugged and looked around at the teleportation circle. The website had been quite accurate, so Caleb knew exactly where they should go. 

There was a dwarven gentleman waiting nearby, waving eagerly to him. “Hello there! Welcome to Rumblecusp. My name is Doron. I take it you’re Mr. Caleb Widogast?”

Caleb nodded, vaguely aware that Molly was staring at him, eyes still saucers. “I am. Where should I grab the passes?”

“Got them right here for you, sir,” he said, rifling with his clipboard in one hand. “Anything else I can help you out with?” As he passed them over, Caleb fumbled a bit in trying to hand him a tip. Doron grinned in thanks.

Shaking his head, Caleb gathered up the passes, slipping one over his neck and one around Molly’s. Molly looked at it, confused but for the moment silent. “We’re all set, I think. Danke, Doron.”

“Of course, if you think of anything, or if you and your boyfriend decide to stay the night, just let me know,” Doron started flipping through his clipboard.

A hot flush sprang to Caleb’s cheeks that had little to do with the change in climate, “Oh, Molly is n-”

“I don’t think we’ll be staying the night together, but thank you, Doron,” Molly said with a grin, hooking his arm through Caleb’s.

“Of course, of course. I’ll be around if you need me.”

“Now, I need to see what all this is, because the curiosity is killing me,” Molly said, following the only pathway they could see.

Molly interrupted Caleb correcting Doron. He didn’t seem to mind being mistaken as Caleb’s boyfriend. Unable to properly understand that information, Caleb just let Molly drag him further down the path. For once he really had no idea what to think, and his brain was coming up blank.

“This is what you’d call a Renaissance Fair. Have you been to one?” Caleb asked quietly, letting Molly take in the bright colors, ridiculously flamboyant outfits, jaunty music, and strange sights that surrounded them.

Adopting the stunned look of amazement Molly’d had at the circus, a slow grin was spreading across his face. “I’ve heard of them. Never seen one.”

“Sounds like there are a lot of lovely things in the world to show you,” Caleb said, staring more at Molly than their colorful surroundings. His tail was flicking back and forth gently, like an excited cat. It was adorable.

Molly turned the grin on Caleb, positively ecstatic, “You’ll have to show me them all.”

Ignoring the flush in his cheeks, Caleb said, “I’d like that.”

They walked slowly around the island turned resort, looking at the different attractions and grabbing food from a few different stalls to snack on. 

As they watched someone in very tight tights juggling with a kind of torch, Caleb said, “I hope you were serious when you said fun, not fancy. I took that to heart.”

“Clearly. I’d take fun like this over fancy bullshit any day.” Molly was practically skipping, tail still flicking. Caleb wondered if it was all like a cat’s body language, or if there were differences. He hadn’t thought about it much before Frumpkin came back, but now it was in the back of his mind wherever they went.

Shortly after they arrived, a pirate ship full of performers stormed the shore and ran into the Renn Fair, “plundering” and laughing and riling everyone up as they went. Molly was laughing and playing along with the performers, one of whom immediately challenged him to a duel after seeing the scimitar at his waste.

Caleb was just pleased to watch their banter, a light smile playing on his lips as he wondered how close this was to repaying Molly for getting back Frumpkin. The cat in question was curled around his neck, content to watch the surroundings and make Caleb sweat. He didn’t have the heart to put him down.

It was a good start.

They watched sword fights, jousting, and a medieval comedic play done to the nines with dramatic costumes. Molly’s tail wrapped around Caleb’s arm as he dragged him to the little shops. Much different than a cat. He found new tinkling chains to wrap in his horns at a vendor, and convinced Caleb to purchase a strange linen shirt with a much lower neckline than he was used to. To fit in, he said. Molly also found a deep maroon skirt covered in little fake metal charms and coins, dragging them both to a bathroom inside the resort to change.

“What do you think?” Molly asked, swaying his hips in the skirt, letting it jingle lightly.

Caleb smiled, noting the tail was swaying down low in anticipation. He would have to pay better attention now. “It suits you.”

Molly beamed, grabbing his hand and pulling him off to the next exciting thing.

As soon as they were both looking the part, they ran into a stall that sold authentic mead, which was probably a mistake to have before they tried their hand at the archery pits. Caleb almost hit a worker with an errant arrow, and nearly got them cut off and banned from the whole activity while Molly snickered the entire time. It was a good thing Caleb could still speak circles around the staff while intoxicated.

After that they focused on trying every different type of historical alcohol they could find, ending up practically wasted and draped over each other. Frumpkin had long since abandoned the spot on Caleb’s shoulder, partly because Caleb might have overheated, and partly because the space was now taken by Molly’s arm. The light dappled through the trees was turning a lovely golden color as the sun set, and everything felt light and floaty.

“So, Caleb,” Molly drawled, both of them too drunk to walk on their own. “Perhaps we should take Doron up on that room for the night, as I’m not sure I trust you to make it back home. Or to not accidentally teleport us to Marquet.”

Caleb snorted at the ridiculous prospect, not bothering to correct Molly’s absolute misunderstanding of the arcane for the moment. “I assure you, I could. But if that’s what you want, we can do that.”

“I want nothing more than to fall asleep somewhere where the bed isn’t freezing.” His words were practically slurring, but he had a point. Caleb was severely enjoying their little tropical escape, and how even the v necked shirt didn’t leave him with goosebumps after the sun had set.

The wizard looked around. “The trouble would be, well, finding him.”

“Right, shit.”

“Wait, I have Frumpkin!” Caleb said, grinning, taking a firmer hold around Molly’s waist and calling him over to his feet telepathically. “Don’t let me walk into a tree, or the ocean, also I cannot see or hear you anymore. I see what Frumpkin sees.”

He shifted his consciousness into Frumpkin’s sight, listening to the sounds around them and trying to pick up the voice of the dwarven man who had welcomed them into the convention center. He found him back towards the entrance, near the hotel.

“I found him. He is by the hotel.”

Then, as a precaution. “Just as a reminder, I can’t hear you.”

He felt himself getting led in the right place, or at least he hoped it was the right direction. Apparently he was less coordinated than expected while drunk off his ass and unable to see or hear.

Molly was practically carrying him.

He blushed deeper than what was already brought to his cheeks from the alcohol and came back from Frumpkin, hearing the end of something Molly was saying. “-cute when you’re drunk.”

“Was?” He blinked, standing up a little straighter and rubbing his eyes. 

“Oh, nothing,” Molly said, a little wide eyed and just as flushed. His cheeks were a slightly darker purple and Caleb wanted to kiss each one.

Caleb blinked and pushed away that thought, pointing out Doron who was now in view, and telling Frumpkin telepathically to jump up on his shoulder.

Molly turned to look at the cat, now nuzzling gently into the tiefling’s shoulder. “Fucking adorable.”

“He is the best cat.” Caleb waved to Doron addressing him then, “We might have changed our mind.”

With a wink, Doron said, “I had a feeling you might. Head right on in, we’ve got plenty of rooms cleaned and ready.”

Caleb caught Molly from stumbling through the doorway, smiling and walking up to the front desk. Molly said, “One room please.”

There was a small part of Caleb that wanted to point out they could get separate rooms. They could make sure they were getting a room with two beds at the very least. But a larger part of him was interested in how Molly didn’t seem to care.

Perhaps he shouldn’t care either.

That part won out.


	32. One Bed? That’s Cliché

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Title says it all, my friends

### Chapter 32: One Bed? That’s Cliché

“Wait, I have Frumpkin!” Caleb said with a broad grin, the little bengal cat trotting over just at the mention of his name. Before Molly could ask what that had to do with anything, Caleb wrapped a firm arm around his waist and his eyes went blank, glowing slightly with arcane energy. “Don’t let me walk into a tree, or the ocean, also I cannot see or hear you anymore. I see what Frumpkin sees.”

“You what?” Molly asked, looking at his wizard and then at the cat trotting away from them. “Cool trick,” he murmured, enjoying the warmth of Caleb holding him so close. It was nice to be intimate like this when neither of them were close to a panic attack or death’s door.

Molly didn’t want the night to end, and he was glad to find Caleb didn’t seem to either.

“I found him. He is by the hotel,” Caleb said, still staring straight ahead.

Molly nodded, “Right, lead the way.”

Then, after too long of a pause, Caleb said, “Just as a reminder, I can’t hear you.”

“Right, right. Does that mean I could say whatever I want to you?” Molly asked, starting to lead the redhead in the direction of the hotel. Caleb followed in silence, stumbling just a little.

Grinning, Molly took advantage.

First he took a moment to just stare, taking the calculated risk of them walking into a tree or a puddle. He wanted to memorize the way the humid air was adding gentle curls to Caleb’s red hair, and the heat was keeping his cheeks a lovely rosy color. The sun was setting and sending little dappled spots of color across Caleb’s face and bright hair, making him look like an impressionist painting. Molly was especially glad he’d convinced Caleb to buy the linen shirt. The plunging neckline exposed new freckles, and the material was nice and cool for the weather, practically sheer.

Caleb looked like he belonged on the cover of a silly romance novel, and Molly was hopelessly smitten.

He could say whatever he wanted. With the alcohol in his system, he couldn’t miss the opportunity. “I wish you knew how gorgeous you are. Or how I’d ask you out in a heartbeat if I didn’t think it would make you uncomfortable. I almost thought this could be a date, before you told Doron… I get taking it slow though,” he rambled, brushing a strand of loose hair behind Caleb’s ear. “I’ll go as slowly as you want. But gods, you’re cute when you’re drunk.”

“Was?” Caleb asked, sounding a little confused.

A deep flush colored Molly’s cheeks as he tried to assess the damage. “Oh, nothing,” he tried to say as casually as possible. Caleb shrugged, seeming not to have heard the worst of it. Thank the Moonweaver.

Molly looked straight down, trying to compose himself. He was in too deep, and he was getting positively sloppy.

They spoke with Doron, getting the key to the room at the front desk and stumbling into the elevator together. Frumpkin was sniffing at Molly’s hair, accepting all the scritches he was willing to give as he cooed at the little familiar. Molly was enjoying the absolutely tender look on Caleb’s face as he watched his cat.

The room was at the end of the hall, and there wasn’t another soul in the hallways. It was quiet enough to hear a pin drop, and Molly wondered if this was far away from where the rest of the people at the Renaissance Fair were sleeping. It had to be.

Of course there was only one bed. With the way they were supporting their drunken bodies, Molly was surprised they hadn’t been directed to the honeymoon suite.

He wouldn’t have complained if they had, but he still wanted to make sure Caleb was comfortable.

Still, this somehow felt different than falling into bed with Caleb after Molly’s panic attack, or after the fight in the graveyard. They had choices now. Choices that Caleb was drunk enough to point out. “Das ist… There is only one… bett. Bed. Bed,” he murmured, losing more of his command of Common as the liquor clouded his mind.

“Do you mind? We’ve done it before, remember?”

Caleb looked at him, and Molly saw the freckles again. There was a smattering of them over his nose and cheeks, and Molly was pretty sure he saw more peeking out from the collar of Caleb’s shirt. He liked being close to those freckles. He wanted to count them. He wanted to kiss them.

He wanted to see if Caleb was hiding more. He hadn’t been paying enough attention before, when he’d seen Caleb shirtless before, but the bloom of necrotic damage across Caleb’s chest had been a bit distracting.

Molly wanted to see where _all_ the freckles were.

“I don’t mind. I certainly don’t think I could walk back down and ask them to change it,” Caleb said, sitting on the edge of the huge king sized bed and rubbing his temples.

Sitting beside him, Molly was a little unsure if he was still allowed to hold Caleb’s waist now that it wasn’t expressly for keeping the wizard upright. But he wanted to keep his hand over the hip bone he’d found. He didn’t want to let go.

Molly sighed softly, resting his chin on Caleb’s shoulder. Until he’d said it out loud earlier, he hadn’t realized quite how badly he wanted to be with the wizard. He was aware, of course, it was impossible to miss. But this was something else.

Thinking back, Molly wasn’t entirely sure he’d felt like this before. He’d had his fair share of flings and exciting trysts with folks he met at the _Lavish Chateau,_ and even the occasional patron of the _Emporium._ This was different. Caleb made him feel warm and safe, like he could tell him any of his deepest darkest secrets and still be respected and cared for.

The carnal aspects were all there too, but the deeper layers were something daunting that had been growing slowly ever since he spent the first afternoon with the man learning Infernal. He didn’t know how to deal with that aspect of a relationship. He didn’t know how to do this, but he’d be damned if he didn’t want to try.

Idly he wondered if Caleb was any more experienced in this type of thing. Even if he’d lost a significant chunk of his life to the sanatorium, he still had a childhood. Caleb had at one point been an attractive, confident young man. The thought of the timid man being more experienced than Molly made his stomach start doing flips.

Molly swallowed, deciding he was drunk enough just to ask. He could blame it on the alcohol tomorrow, even as he was beginning to feel the heaviest part of the fog clear already. “Caleb?”

“Hmm?” Caleb hummed, turning to meet his eyes. He was so close. Molly could lean forward and close the gap, just kiss him and leave any of the questions for tomorrow.

That wasn’t right. “Could I ask kind of a weird question? You don’t have to answer it if it’s too personal.”

“Of course, Mollymauk.” Caleb said, voice a little husky, and Molly swore his eyes flitted down to look at his lips. He wanted to kiss him, watch the blush turn his cheeks that beautiful soft pink.

Molly sighed, biting his lip instead and trying to think of how to phrase the question. “Have you… Have you been in a relationship recently?” Hopefully Caleb wouldn’t read into the question too much.

Well. Would it be such a bad thing if he did? The worst thing he could do was say no. But the thought alone was painful enough for Molly to push it away, focusing intently on Caleb’s face instead.

The beautiful pink rushed right to Caleb’s cheeks, as expected, though Molly wished it was memories of him, not past lovers, that did so. “I… No. Not recently.”

“Most of the relationships I’ve been in have been very… casual. Quick. Don’t get me wrong, they were all wonderful, but I feel… inexperienced, I guess. With the emotional part.” Molly said, wanting to look away, but still wanting to gage Caleb’s reactions. “I feel like getting my information from Jester’s romance novels isn’t helping either,” he added, though his joking tone sounded off even to him.

Caleb swallowed. “I can’t say I’m particularly experienced. There’s only one to speak of, really. I told you a bit about… about Astrid.”

Astrid.

Molly knew the name, though it took him a moment to remember Caleb’s story about the Soltryce Academy and Ikithon. Astrid had been one of the three chosen students from his hometown. She must have known how Caleb felt about everything. Known him like she knew herself. More than Molly could ever dream to. The thought clenched around his heart like a fist. “A bit. Was that… casual?”

“Ah, no. At least, I didn’t think so. Not that anything seemed casual back then. I was sixteen and proud and thought I was doing the most important work in the Empire.” Caleb said, flush leaving his cheeks as his gaze moved further away. Not happy memories. Astrid hadn’t broken. For all Molly knew she was off being evil as fuck in the Empire, under Ikithon’s thumb and hunting Caleb down.

Molly was going to ask more when Caleb went on. “I don’t think she ever loved me like I loved her. She was too focused on her ambitions. I understood that then, told myself it didn’t hurt. She was… she was a wildfire. Beautiful, bright, but wicked and dangerous. I probably dodged a bullet, honestly. We probably would have burned the world to ash and not looked back once.” His stare was still far away, but just gently mournful. A soft smile danced on his lips, but there was more sadness in his eyes than pleasure.

“Do you… Do you still lo-” Molly was interrupted by a knock at the door. He sighed softly. Probably a sign. Knowing the answer to that question would probably just hurt him.

Caleb blinked back to the present and stood up out of Molly’s grasp to answer it. “Hallo?”

A voice spoke softly on the other side of the door.

“We did not order any room service,” Caleb said, and Molly could hear the frown in his voice. He wanted to kiss it away. Even if Caleb wasn’t so far away, there was a reason that was a bad idea, but he couldn’t quite remember all the reasons why. He was probably a better kisser than some sixteen year old girl from Caleb’s memory. In four years, he’d spent a lot of time practicing.

He wouldn’t have minded practicing more with Caleb either.

“Compliments of Doron. He said you folks were having an impromptu stay and wanted to make sure you’d be comfortable.”

Caleb had moved aside, letting the elven woman in the room with a rolling cart. Molly looked up in curiosity at the metal cart, which most prominently had two toothbrushes, toothpaste, two fluffy white robes, a disposable razor, and bottles of water. But sitting behind it all was a bottle of champagne, two flutes, a plate of chocolate covered strawberries, and some sort of fancy charcuterie board.

Staring at it, wide eyed in the soft yellow light of the hotel, slightly flushed, Caleb looked fucking goreous. Molly was going to have to thank Doron.


	33. It's Too Late For Me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Would it really be in character for Caleb if he didn't have a melt down and self sabotage any pleasure he's ever experienced? No, no it wouldn't. (a lil fluff before the angst tho because I love these soft folks)

### Chapter 33: It’s Too Late For Me

Doron really didn’t understand the relationship between Caleb and Molly. That was clear from the champagne, cheese board, and chocolate covered strawberries sent to their hotel room with one bed.

The condoms were a bit much.

Caleb was tipsy enough not to turn bright red just at the sight, but he still carefully tucked them in the pocket of one of the robes before Molly came to inspect the layout.

“This is one of the nicest places I’ve ever been,” Molly said, picking up the bottle and grinning. “I know you don’t put a value on Frumpkin, but you’ve more than paid me back.”

Absentmindedly Caleb lifted his hand to scratch behind said familiar’s ears, “I’m glad you think so, but I might disagree. Frumpkin is priceless.”

“So are you,” Molly said, the sentiment somehow lessened by the block of cheese he said it around. Caleb had to hold back a snort, to which Molly rolled his eyes. “Ever popped a bottle of champagne?” he asked, ripping off the foil top.

“Not that I can remember,” Caleb said softly, looking at the bottle. He was barely of age when he had broken, and when traveling with Nott had always preferred beer or whiskey. Lately he just drank whatever everyone else was drinking. Champagne was a luxury he never considered.

Molly passed it to him, “Well, you do the honors then.”

“I, um… I don’t know how,” he said, looking at the strange metal cage around the cork, unsure of how messy this was going to be.

There was a devious look in Molly’s eye as he moved around behind Caleb’s back, “I’ll show you. Luckily the customers at the Lavish Chateau have expensive taste.”

The flush on Caleb’s cheeks was never going to go down. Molly’s arms circled around his. “First you want to be sure that it’s really cold, so it doesn’t explode like it does in the movies. These guys are smart, they must have had this on ice for a while. Then you cover the top with a towel or a napkin, like this,” Molly guided his hand to the right position on the bottle, showing him how to twist the cage off carefully. His arms were warm and his touch was gentle, but Caleb was more preoccupied with how his chest was pressing up against Caleb’s back. It was tropical, but Caleb was getting even warmer.

“Then you twist the _bottle,_ not the cork,” Molly said, his hand still guiding Caleb through the motions until there was a quiet hiss. “Of course you can do it with a lot of theatrics and have the fizz go everywhere, but you waste a lot of good bubbly that way.” He slipped away from Caleb, extending one of the flutes for Caleb to pour him a glass.

Clearing his throat, Caleb asked, “You teach all the patrons of the Lavish Chateau that way?”

“Gods, no,” Molly laughed. “Well, I suppose someone taught me that way, and I thought I could return the favor.”

A bloom of jealousy rose in Caleb’s chest, sudden and surprising. That was very new. That was dangerous.

He had no right to feel protective over Molly. Especially not when Molly would be better off with someone other than him.

Caleb could hear the more rational part of himself refuting that, quietly. Saying maybe he could enjoy something like this, if Molly really wanted to.

Molly traded the bottle for the filled glass and poured another for himself, grabbing the charcuterie board and chocolate covered strawberries before flopping into the bed. “Want to watch stupid television?”

“Actually, I had a question,” Caleb said, swallowing the lump in his throat and sipping at the champagne. It was a little sweet for his tastes, but still nice.

Molly ate a chocolate covered strawberry in a way that was far, far too distracting. All tongue and red juice. “Shoot.”

“I… Well, I was wondering why you were asking about relationships.” Caleb’s voice was barely a whisper, and he focused all his attention on petting Frumpkin in his lap. His cheeks were burning.

“It looks like you might already know,” Molly said, reaching to pet the familiar too and letting their hands brush against each other.

Caleb drew his hand back, staring at the unblinking cat. “I do not like to make assumptions for other people.”

“Did I make you feel uncomfortable?” Molly asked, his voice smaller than usual.

Caleb blinked, looking over, “Nein.”

Molly met his eyes and sat up a little straighter, taking a deep breath but still petting Frumpkin. “I like you. In ways that I’ve never felt before. It scares me, honestly. There’s a lot new to me, and this is very new. But I like it.”

Caleb hadn’t dared to hope. To have it confirmed was a shock. To know that his feelings were returned was near incomprehensible. He couldn’t tell if this was from his wildest dreams or worst nightmares. But he knew he wanted it. He wanted everything that came with being enamored with Molly.

With just enough liquid courage in his veins, Caleb shifted a bit closer. “I’m afraid you have terrible taste.”

Molly scoffed in mock indignation, all his teasing brought back as he bared his soul. “Rude!” he smirked. “I have excellent taste in everything.”

“I’ll have to disagree on that one,” Caleb said, watching Molly move the plates out from in between them.

Cupping his cheek, Molly tipped Caleb’s face to look directly at his. Frumpkin didn’t need to be told to hop out of his lap. “Self depreciation isn’t a very good look on you, dear.”

“I’m afraid you’ll find me quite undesirable then, unfortunately,” Caleb mumbled, feeling the burning in his cheeks under Molly’s hand. 

Molly rolled his eyes. “For a quiet introvert, sometimes you talk too much. I can assure you that you’re quite desirable.”

In response, Caleb cheek warmed more under Molly’s hand but he stayed silent, neither one of them wanting to take the plunge and close the other gap. Frumpkin had made himself happy in a plush chair pointed away from the bed, curling into a ball facing away from them.

Caleb wondered if he should poof him away. Did people put their pets out of the room for this kind of thing? He had never really had to think about it since Astrid never saw much use in a familiar hanging around.

“What about me?” Molly asked softly after a moment.

“Was?” Caleb mumbled again, looking up. The Zemnian was all he could manage. The proximity was far too distracting, especially considering that Molly, beautiful, wonderful, Molly liked him back. His mind was racing at a million miles an hour, and he was having trouble thinking back on the last thing that was said.

“Do you find me desirable?”

Oh. What a ridiculous question. “That might be the most foolish thing you’ve ever said to me,” Caleb said. A flash of hurt crossed Molly’s features, sending a pang of pain straight to Caleb’s chest. He quickly went on. “You’re the most desirable person I’ve ever met.”

Molly bit his lip, the darkened look in his eye sending a shiver down Caleb’s spine. His eyes flicked down to Caleb’s lips, then back to his eyes, cocking his head in a clear question. Caleb put his hand over the one holding his cheek and moved ever so slightly closer.

They closed the distance carefully, cautiously, together. The first brush of lips was chaste and gentle. Caleb felt Molly’s mouth curve into a smile and the other arm of the tiefling moved to his waist, hand rubbing lightly at his hip. The second kiss was more determined, more hungry. But not desperately so, just with an undercurrent of passion, of relief in finally being able to give in.

Tentatively, waiting for Molly to pull back and realize this whole ordeal was a mistake, that he wasn’t worth it, that he’d be better off with someone else, Caleb moved one hand behind Molly’s neck, pulling the tiefling a bit closer. Molly let out a sound of approval straight into his mouth that was halfways to a _moan_ that shot through Caleb’s body like a lightning strike.

Molly answered in kind, wrapping his arm further around Caleb’s waist and pulling their bodies closer together. Then the tail, the _tail_ pulled around his back, the tip wrapping all the way around to his chest, gentle but adding another sensation and tugging the two even closer, until they were practically pressing together. That was fascinating.

And distracting.

Caleb’s hand moved from covering Molly’s on his cheek and brushed over the strange spade shaped end of the tail. The tiefling shuddered in his grasp, letting out a low groan that was halfways to a snarl.

That sound led to more than a few dangerous thoughts. The sound had spiked Caleb’s level of arousal to a very worrying point. Heart stuttering in his chest, Caleb dropped the tail like a live wire and pulled back. “Sorry, I did not mean to-”

“Don’t apologize,” Molly said, the tone of his voice much darker than Caleb had heard before. He swallowed as Molly went on. “I’ll let you know if you do something I don’t like, but I can’t really imagine what that would be right now. What about you?”

Caleb bit his lip, a curl of doubt settling in his stomach as the confidence the alcohol instilled in him faded into soberness. “I… I feel you will regret this tomorrow.”

A deep frown settled across Molly’s features and the doubt bloomed through Caleb’s chest and threatened to consume him. He’d already ruined the moment. There was no going back at this point. The little voice of encouragement he’d found earlier was nowhere to be found.

“Now who’s being foolish?” Molly mumbled, running a hand over Caleb’s bottom lip to keep him from biting it as harshly as he was.

But the floodgates were opened and the insecurities were shutting down any part of his brain that was ready for this. “You and I have both been drinking, and I’m sure otherwise, we would never…” Every word out of his mouth seemed to set the frown on Molly’s face deeper into stone, but he couldn’t stop. “If you were sober, I’m sure you’d never go for… for someone like me.”

“Do you think I can’t make my own decisions about who I want?” Molly’s still had the husky quality to it that probably would have given Caleb weak knees had they been standing.

Caleb pulled further back, trying to clear the desires from his head. He didn’t deserve them anyways. “You’re drunk.”

“I’m much closer to tipsy, but I’m still not doing anything I haven’t wanted to do since I met you.” Molly let him pull away but kept the tail wrapped gently around his waist.

Pulling even further away Caleb summoned Frumpkin to his lap so he had something to ground himself, though he wasn’t sure why this made him quite so anxious. It was good to let Molly know that he wasn’t worth Molly’s time. Molly needed to know. 

He didn’t deserve to have this intimacy with this beautiful creature. Molly was beyond him, like fey, like a deity. How could he care for a monster? Caleb should have just insisted on teleporting them home. He should teleport them home now. He should at least give him the option.

Caleb started, “You know how Yasha and I met. You know the whole story. You know that I am… I am broken. You deserve so much better. I certainly don’t deserve you. I can just teleport us back home-”

“Now, I like to think of myself as a master of bullshit, and that, sir, is some of the worst bullshit I’ve ever heard,” Molly huffed.

Caleb shook his head, trying to get Molly to understand. “There’s no real point to me trying to make amends for what I’ve done. Leaving places better than I found them… None of it matters. I can’t do anything to change the past. Nothing I do will be enough to make up for what I’ve done. I’m a terrible person, I don’t deserve anything close to this.”

“Now, that’s just not true. What about all your friends? Look at Jester, how happy she is with you. How much you’ve brought her out of her shell and given her space to grow.” Molly moved to stare at Caleb again, but he couldn’t meet the tiefling’s eyes. 

He said, “Jester would be happy with anyone. She would probably be much happier with someone better than myself.” Caleb had told himself that plenty of times. And now that she was interested in Fjord, he would step back and allow the crush to fade away. Some day the same thing would happen with Molly, though even the thought felt like a stabbing pain.

“And Yasha? She wouldn’t just find another friend. Not like you. Not someone who has gone through what she has. Do you think she has nothing to offer the world?” Molly still didn’t understand.

“Of course not, Yasha is a good person.” And Caleb never would be. He would always be a monster.

But Molly wouldn’t stop, “What about Nott? Where would she be without you? What about Yeza, and Luc? Don’t you think you’ve left them better off than they were? Reuniting their family?”

Caleb said nothing, hunching down further around Frumpkin and letting the cat nuzzle into his neck. Grounding, warm purrs. More comfort than he deserved.

Molly went on, “I might have only known you a short time compared to some of the others, but I think I’ve probably gotten to know you pretty well. You were willing to give me a second chance. And Yasha, and Fjord, and Calianna, even though I don’t know all their business. Would you tell them that nothing they do can make up for what they’ve done?”

He shook his head, moving his head further down into Frumpkin’s fur.

“But you still don’t believe me? That you’re a good person? That I want to be with you?”

Caleb didn’t know what to say. The encouraging voice told him to listen, not to shut down. But he couldn’t do it. So he repeated himself, “You’re drunk.”

“I guess I’ll just tell you it all again when we’re both sober,” Molly grumbled, angrily starting to rip off his boots. He wasn’t sure if Molly was more frustrated with the boots or him, so he kept his distance instead of offering to help like he wanted to.

Molly didn’t need his help. Molly didn’t need him.

Caleb didn’t move as Molly got ready for bed, other than the rhythmic stroking over Frumpkin’s purring form. This was good. This was putting a stop to things. He’d let things go on too long and too far; Yasha had made that much clear to him in the past. This was just the tipping point.

“Are you going to sleep in your boots?” Molly asked, his voice softer than before.

Looking down at his boots, Caleb sighed softly. He felt like he was losing something, though he’d never really had it. He’d taken the nebulous something between them and stomped on it.

“Nein,” he finally mumbled, pulling them off and placing them beside the bed, carefully unstrapping the book holster from his chest as well. He disappeared into the bathroom, splashing his face with cold water and brushing his teeth. Caleb slipped out of his clothes down to his boxers and pulled on one of the long robes that Doron had left in lieu of any real pajamas. He didn’t trust himself to sleep in any less clothing, even though it was hot.

This was a good thing. This was closer to what he deserved.

Molly was too good, and he hardly deserved to stand beside him as his friend, much less anything else. It was too late for Caleb, and he needed to accept that. 

Caleb poured himself a tall glass of water and downed the whole thing, trying to stave off any hangover. He walked out into the room again, seeing Molly pulling off his clothes and slipping under the sheets in just his underwear. Caleb looked away respectfully, pulling back the blankets so he would be on a different layer. It would be hot enough for it anyways.

He was already sweating in the robe. After a moment of deliberation he decided he couldn’t sleep in the sweaty bandages. Hiking up his sleeves he unwound them carefully, slipping the pile into the trashcan by the bed. Once he was finished he realized Molly was staring.

Caleb quickly pulled the sleeves back down. He didn’t want Molly to have to look at the awful scars. Molly was already going to regret this in the morning. No reason to make it worse. “If…” he paused, unsure how to phrase what he wanted to say, “If you would rather not talk about what happened tonight when you wake up tomorrow morning, I will understand.”

Molly’s face was unreadable. 

“Go to sleep, Caleb.”


	34. A Slow Burn

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> freckles and fluff

### Chapter 34: A Slow Burn

Molly’s head _hurt_.

Over the pounding in his ears he tried to remember exactly how he ended up in this very nice, but very plain white bed.

And who on Earth he was tangled around.

He rubbed his eyes with his free hand, frowning as the events of the previous evening came trickling back to him. Caleb had kissed him. Or he had kissed Caleb. It was hazy as to who finally closed the gap. It was mutual though. Mutual and very, _very_ nice.

Molly remembered the events that followed, all relatively chaste until Caleb had started rubbing his tail and all his nerve endings felt like they were on fire.

Molly remembered the negative spiral Caleb had sunk down, insisting they stop. And he remembered stopping himself from getting too upset, knowing he would have no filter with the lingering effects of the booze and he would say something that might set Caleb off. That might scare him away forever.

He bit his lip, remembering Caleb curling up in the farthest corner of the bed, turned away from him. And he’d let him, since he knew he couldn’t possibly put better words to his feelings than he already had. If Caleb didn’t believe him then, he really wouldn’t have believed him enough to cuddle.

But he _didn’t_ remember Caleb moving back into the middle of the bed, or either of them kicking off the covers so they were once again waking up, skin on skin.

For all the pounding in his head, Molly was grateful to have woken up before Caleb, able to see the man sleeping soundly in his arms, curled against his chest with his mouth slightly ajar. His red hair was mussed up and almost frizzy with curls in the humid air, spilling over Molly’s lavender arm. Morning sunlight illuminated the room in a pale yellow light, warm and soft. Especially if this was the last time Caleb would allow this to happen, Molly could take this moment to relish in the feeling of Caleb’s arm wrapped lazily around his waist, the other resting against his chest.

As gently as he could manage, he pressed a light kiss to Caleb’s temple, then put his pounding head back down on the pillow.

He should get up, unwrap himself from the wizard, and get the man a glass of water for when he woke up. It would be kind. Hells, he should go get himself a glass of water. Or four. But his headache was tolerable.

For now he would be selfish, letting himself be held since it might not happen again.

Pushing down the part of him that argued for rationality and movement, Molly got to work doing something he’d been meaning to, sincerely hoping this wasn’t really his last chance. He started counting the freckles that dusted Caleb’s nose and cheeks, moving to the smattering of them he could see on Caleb's chest when he had figured out the exact number on the face (347, though some were overlapping).

Before he had gotten past 50 on Caleb’s chest, the man groaned softly, shifting in his grip.

“Headache?” Molly murmured, hoping he wouldn’t jolt out of his arms.

“Not too bad. You?” Caleb shook his head, the Zemnian accent thick and husky in an unfairly sexy way. This couldn’t be the last time, Molly wouldn’t let it be. Not when he could finally tell Caleb wanted this too. He could be patient, if it felt like this.

“The worst.”

“You should get some water,” Caleb mumbled, blinking his eyes open.

Time to put all the cards on the table again. Molly much preferred the alcohol induced confession. He knew he sounded very eloquent (or at least he thought he had in the moment), but didn’t remember a word he’d said beyond liking Caleb. Making a plan for what to say, that was probably what he should have been doing this whole time, instead of counting the freckles on Caleb’s cheeks.

Oh well. Fuck it.

“If I get up, I’m worried you won’t let me hold you again,” was what Molly finally decided on, wishing his cheeks weren’t deepening to a darker violet as he spoke.

Caleb just stared at him wide eyed, and Molly could almost hear the gears turning in that big magically inclined brain.

He was in this deep already. “Do you remember everything from last night?”

“You know I remember everything.” Caleb’s voice was small. Unsure and timid.

Molly sighed in relief. He didn’t have to remember the exact words. Caleb could be good at words and he could be good at emotions. “Good. I meant every word.”

Caleb looked like the two halves of his brain had broken out in a civil war, a deep furrow making its trench in his brow. He said nothing, but opened his mouth as if he had many things to say.

Watching him carefully, Molly could practically see the spiral. He could catch Caleb as he fell now that he was sober, he was sure of it. “Can I ask you a question?”

Closing his open mouth and then opening it again, there was only silence. Caleb eventually just nodded.

“Do you feel the same?” Molly asked, wanting to make sure it wasn’t just Caleb projecting his worries onto Molly last night.

Once again, words seemed to fail Caleb and he just nodded, filling Molly with relief. “Well, thank fuck for that,” he said, feeling his grin return to his cheeks.

“But, Mollymauk-” Caleb started, caught off guard when Molly interrupted him.

“Wait, don’t talk yet. Hear me out, okay?” Molly murmured, looking for confirmation to continue. “You can nod though, I guess,” he amended. “You like me, like I like you,” he said, looking for the nod.

Caleb nodded, a little blush creeping up on his cheeks. Molly couldn’t help himself, rubbing his thumb over the bloom of soft pink. He wanted a shirt this color. Or maybe a scarf. “Good. And I want this. Do you want this?”

He nodded again, leaning into the touch but looking almost overwhelmed with guilt.

“I think this would make me very happy. Do you think it would make you happy?” Molly finally asked, looking away from the blush and meeting those endlessly blue eyes. Another nod.

Molly grinned. “That’s all there is to it then. There’s absolutely no room for pasts in a relationship with me. I want you to be happy, and I think you want me to be happy. I hope so, at least.”

Caleb was still frowning at him.

“Is there anything you can say that’s actually based on rational thought and reason as to why we shouldn’t be together?” Molly asked, hoping he had decent arguments for all of them.

“Where to begin,” Caleb mumbled, abandoning all eye contact but still not pulling away. The little bloom of hope in Molly’s chest was only growing. “You are… wie sagt man? Out of my league?”

“Considering I think we both play for many teams, I think that’s kind of a moot point,” Molly countered, almost snorting. But a memory from last night burned clearly in his mind.

Caleb has said, _“You’re the most desirable person I’ve ever met.”_ And goddamn if remembering those words didn’t make Molly want to kiss him again. But he could take this slow. He could ease every worry. He’d been prepared to wait even longer; this was more than he’d hoped for.

But Caleb was frowning at him, completely lost in the metaphor. “It’s a bisexual joke, don’t worry about it,” Molly mumbled. “But if you’re talking about levels of attractiveness, I have to say you’re quite mistaken.”

Scoffing, Caleb shook his head and looked down.

“Seriously. Do you know what I did before you woke up?” Molly asked, his voice soft, almost embarrassed but holding a sliver of excitement to see if this would bring more of the lovely pink blush to Caleb’s cheeks.

Caleb looked back up, questioning.

“I counted all the freckles on your cheeks and your nose,” Molly said, brushing his thumb over some of them delicately.

Just like he expected, the pink bloomed underneath his thumb, making him grin. Caleb’s face was adorable as he was consumed by embarrassment and sought shelter in the crook of Molly’s neck. That was welcome. Molly could only grin wider and hugged him close, placing a light kiss on Caleb’s shoulder, grateful the robe had started to slip. Against his pulse point, Molly mumbled, “347.”

“Was?” Caleb asked, voice husky, slipping back into Zemnian.

“You have 347 freckles on your cheeks and your nose. I didn’t get to go any further before you woke up.”

“You are the most foolish creature I have ever met,” Caleb said, his breath washing over Molly’s neck and sending a shiver down his spine.

Molly pulled Caleb a little closer, pressing another kiss onto his shoulder. “I'm always ready to make a damn fool of myself. But especially when it comes to you.”

He could hear Caleb gulp against him. “This is… a lot.”

Molly tensed, starting to pull back, “I’m sorry, I just thought-”

“Please don’t apologize, I-” Caleb’s face looked panicked and Molly moved to untangle them more. 

But that only seemed to make things worse so Molly just froze, “Tell me what you want.”

The panic grew in Caleb’s eyes again, so Molly went on, “I won’t be upset with whatever the answer is. If you want to go back home and not talk about this, we can do that, for now at least. If you want to talk, we can. If you want to just lie here together, we can do that too. If you want to say screw it, and fuck like rabbits, I’d be more than happy to oblige.” Molly grinned at the flush that his words brought to Caleb’s cheeks. “Your call. Your pace. I’m down for anything.”

“My pace,” he mumbled, eyes flicking away from Molly’s as he sat up straighter and moved away carefully. “Um… slower. Much slower. This is still very… difficult to convince myself…” he trailed off, but still looked like he was searching for the words, “To convince myself I might be able to enjoy this. That I could be allowed to want this.”

“So where is the boundary for now? I don’t want to make you uncomfortable.” Caleb thinking he didn’t deserve happiness would be something to work on at another time, when he didn’t look like he would bolt out of the hotel room at any second. Maybe Molly could convince Caleb to talk to Pumat about that. Or at least Caduceus.

Caleb swallowed, sitting up a little in the bed, separating them. “Touching, like this,” he took Molly’s hand gently, “is nice. I’m not sure about much more, right now at least.”

“So hand holding is good.” Molly nodded, taking note.

Biting his lip, Caleb moved a little closer, leaning against Molly’s side. Molly wrapped an arm over his shoulders, “And this?”

“That’s nice too. We already established hugs are fine. I like… I like not sleeping alone, sometimes,” he said, face still pink. 

Molly hummed, “Me too. My bed is much more comfortable than the pullout couch anyways. Not that you can’t have your own space still.”

Caleb blinked. “Right. Aren’t there rules about relationships with roommates?”

“Do I look like a person who follows rules?” Molly asked with a grin. “At least that kind. But if you want I can help you go apartment hunting.”

He softened a bit, “Ja, that sounds nice.”

Molly beamed. This was progress. Sure, it had taken them getting into a drunken stupor to get there, but this was still progress. Now they could actually have a conversation. Now they could move forward.

“We’d better get back home. If Nott’s noticed you’re missing with me she’ll probably have a bounty on my head already,” Molly said. “And the hotel staff probably want us out of here at some point.”

Caleb nodded, grabbing his backpack and packing it up quietly. Molly did his best to help, mostly in getting his own pants on so they could leave. Before Caleb could grab the doorknob Molly grabbed his hand, “Hey.”

“Ja?” Caleb looked at him, a little surprised.

Molly bit his lip, trying to think of how to exactly express every glowing emotion that was floating in him in the moment. “I… thank you. For giving me a chance, I mean.”

For a moment, Caleb just stared, the deep blush coming back to his cheeks. His eyes flickered down, “You are an incredibly ostentatious, absurdly colorful, and loud person. But you are also extremely kind, wonderful, and patient. You… I feel… as though I could do nothing to possibly deserve this. I know a lot of that stems from guilt. I apologize for everything last night. I know that most of it is just my own old guilt, it’s just… difficult. Ah, I am rambling. I only meant to say the same. You are giving me more chances than I deserve, and I am… I am grateful.”

If a heart could burst out of a chest, Molly’s might. Never had a relationship felt quite like this, and they’d only kissed. And they probably wouldn’t do that again for a while, but it still felt like something new and utterly precious. Molly had no words to answer, just pulling Caleb closer to hug him, awkwardly around the large backpack, but tightly all the same. “Is this okay?” he asked, wanting to make sure.

Caleb nodded into his shoulder, and in a little burst of confidence he kissed Molly’s cheek. Even at the little motion Molly could feel his own blush, though it could have been the heat radiating off the wizard, whose cheeks were now as red as the hair on his head. Caleb quickly pulled away, still keeping Molly’s hand in his as they made their way outside.


	35. Celebrations and More Clichés

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> parties, pizza, champagne, and truth or dare, a.k.a. the perfect evening with the M9

### Chapter 35: Celebrations and More Clichés

Caleb was having a pretty good week. After the night spent at Rumblecusp, he and Molly had spent a little more time just being close, but nothing too quick or overwhelming. Spending the night in each other’s beds, cuddling, holding hands, gentle things away from any public eye or their friends. Molly hadn’t been lying about being willing to take it at Caleb’s pace, and for that Caleb was grateful.

Caleb was grateful for many things.

Yussa was back in town, and very pleased with the holiday profit margins of _Jester and Nott’s Divine Delights._ He was more than willing to help some with some research and spell creation for his new little business partner, even if it was peculiar to see the goblin and his master in the same room. Days were spent locked up in the tower, now that Fjord was able to cover Caleb’s shifts at the bookstore. Every night he’d come home exhausted, but Molly would be waiting for him, without fail. Even if he had already fallen asleep, he would wake up enough to cuddle close until they both fell under again and started the cycle over.

But tonight, tonight they’d gotten it.

And tonight, Nott and Caleb were going to celebrate.

“Mollymauk, do you know where I keep my money in the apartment?” Caleb asked, not even bothering to say hello as he called the tiefling. He had caller ID.

“Yes? Are we fleeing the country or something?” his voice was teasing, but there was a hint of concern.

Caleb couldn’t be bothered by that; he couldn’t be bothered by anything, “Please take a handful of platinum and buy as much champagne as you can carry to bring to the apartment. Bring Yasha.”

“You did it?” Caleb could hear the excitement mounting in Molly’s voice and he couldn’t help it, he gathered Nott up in another swirling hug, spinning down the sidewalk as they went back to Molly and Yasha’s apartment.

“We did it, we got it, we finally got it.” He couldn’t keep the grin off his face.

Molly was laughing on the other line, Nott squabbling as he spun her around, “Caleb, put me down! I know you’re happy, but I’m on the phone, and so are you- What? What do you mean you don’t have any clay? Caduceus it’s literally your name, how can you not have any clay?”

Caleb could hear the grin on Molly’s face, and imagining his face only made him happier. “I’ll get the champagne, don’t worry. YASH, we have a job to do!” he hollered, not quite covering the phone receiver enough and saying goodbye quickly.

Frumpkin was purring on his neck, and everything was right with the world. Nott had ended her call with Caduceus too, sighing softly as they walked towards the subway. She was currently texting Yeza directions to Molly and Yasha’s apartment, telling him she had a surprise for him and to get a sitter for Luc.

Yeza was confused, but set out to do as she asked. Caleb was pleased. The two of them deserved this happiness.

“Kind of weird right?” Nott asked, breaking him out of his thoughts.

“Hm?”

“Like… the end of an era. Not that you took too long to do it, I mean you invented new magic for me-”

“Ja, the end of an era,” Caleb said, ruffling Nott’s hair. “You have changed me for the better, Schatz. You’re more family than I ever deserved.”

She grinned back up at him, not even bothering to swat his hand away for messing up her hair. “Oh shut up. You deserve like, seven families.”

Caleb snorted, rolling his eyes at her. “You’re ridiculous. You’re lucky I love you.”

“So, speaking of love…” Nott said, her grin turning positively wicked.

He frowned, “What do you think you’re talking about?”

“You know exactly what I’m talking about.”

Caleb could have groaned, but it was always best to feign ignorance. His friends didn’t need to know that he could read people better than he revealed. “I wouldn’t have asked if I knew.”

“Yes, you would, because you like to play dumb about your emotions, even to yourself because you think you don’t deserve nice things. But you do, Caleb, you deserve wonderful things. Look at what you’ve done for me! You invented magic for me!”

“You are truly, truly ridiculous,” Caleb said, finding her a seat on the subway and standing in front of her, knowing she would watch his back. Not to mention Frumpkin around his neck, keeping an eye out for anything unusual.

Nott hopped up on the seat and swung her legs, staring at him pointedly. “I won’t say it, because I know you’ll just deny it, but I know what’s happening. I’m not blind, Caleb.”

Caleb sighed, hoping she would drop it when they started moving along during rush hour. “I know you are not blind, Veth.”

“That’s still weird.”

He grinned, teasing attitude coming back as he was reminded of their accomplishments. “You’ll have to get used to it, why not start now?”

“That’s true,” she nodded, “but maybe just Nott, until it’s over. You know, Yeza kissed me on a dare. I bet Jester would love to play Truth or Dare tonight.”

Caleb stared at her, not pleased with the change in subject. She was very insistent on avoiding what made her uncomfortable. He was not afforded the same luxury, apparently. “Schatz.”

“I mean, It is _my_ party.”

He sighed. “I can just pick truth all night.”

“So you’d rather tell Molly you love him than kiss him?”

Both sounded like not great options. He was not a fan of PDA, not like that, and he and Molly had done little besides holding hands and cuddling. Not that it wasn’t lovely, but things were nice and slow. And hidden from Jester. He had trouble with some of her _normal_ teasing. “Can’t you be nice to the man who’s going to get you back in your halfling body?”

She rolled her eyes then, taking his hand and squeezing it. “Does he know?”

“I think so.”

Nott patted his knuckles, “Make him know so, before he gets away and breaks your fucking heart.”

“I know, Schatz. You know it’s hard for me to say those things out loud,” he mumbled, not pulling his hand away but definitely wanting to.

He was saved by them reaching his stop, pulling Nott up to a standing position and letting her go. Caleb tried to shake off the feelings of inadequacy and focus on how they had finally found the perfect transmutation ritual to help his dearest friend. It was perfect, tonight was going to be perfect, and the speed at which he and Molly were taking their relationship had nothing to do with anything. 

How the rest of their friends found out about the small gathering at Molly’s apartment, Caleb couldn’t be sure, but he had more than a few suspicions about the tieflings. Soon every one of their friends were crowded into Molly and Yasha’s living room, everyone splayed out in comfy clothes like a sleepover and half of them curled up on the constantly pulled out sofa bed Caleb had been sleeping on. 

Of course there were more than a few nights over the past few weeks that Caleb had been encouraged to sleep in Molly’s room, and one or two nights when Molly complained that he was too tired to make it to his bed after waiting for Caleb to come home from working on the spell. Now that he thought about it, they hadn't actually slept apart since coming back from Rumblecusp. He also hadn’t yet taken Molly up on apartment hunting, though he knew he should, especially now that Nott’s research was no longer an excuse. But those weren’t the thoughts to focus on as everyone drank champagne and congratulated Nott and Caleb with wide grins. Molly and Yasha had indeed purchased all the champagne they could carry, setting up a spread of pizza on the kitchen counter as well. Champagne and pizza might have been a strange combination, but it suited their ragtag group of friends well.

Everyone was content to snuggle under the blankets or grab pillows and eat pizza while they talked about their days, asked Nott questions about the spell, and just relaxed. Yeza and Nott were curled up together on an armchair, talking excitedly. Every once in a while she would have to ask him about one of the more complicated aspects and he would explain.

For once, Caleb felt completely content.

It was a strange feeling, to not have lingering anxieties weighing on him, and it was most definitely assisted by the champagne. But it was indescribably nice to be able to lean on Molly’s shoulder without fear of Jester’s teasing, and just watch all his friends, his family, talking with each other and enjoying this occasion. This occasion he helped make a reality.

Nott was glowing, though he could still feel the underlying nerves, but he would send her home soon and Yeza would be able to calm her the rest of the way. Luc would be ecstatic, as much as he loved his badass goblin mom, to see her happy. Everyone would be.

And with Frumpkin purring in his lap combined with the way Molly’s fingers were rubbing calming circles on Caleb’s arm as he held him close around the shoulders, it was nearer to bliss than he’d felt in decades.

Of course then Jester said, “Let’s play truth or dare!” Caleb could see the gleam in Nott’s eye next to him. Guess he got no sympathy for changing the fabric of the universe for her.

Yasha, saint that she was, said, “We have house rules. No relationship stuff. For truths or dares.” The look Beau gave her made Caleb think many people would benefit from such a rule.

It was clear she was lying, but Molly nodded, “Yes, we do. I like the Zone of Truth rule too. No one is allowed to resist it!”

Caduceus seemed pleased with the rules as well, offering to cast the spell once or twice alongside Jester. She only pouted for a minute, but soon brightened again at the idea of getting to use her spells, casting and letting everyone know that no one resisted it.

Jester grinned, “I’ll go first! Molly, truth or dare?”

Caleb could have pouted. All he could hope for was that Molly would pick truth so he wouldn’t have to stop leaning on his shoulder. 

“Hmm… dare.”

A vain hope.

Jester chewed her lip for a minute. “Let me look at your phone, unlocked for a minute.”

Molly rolled his eyes and tossed it to her. “If you wanted to see nudes, you could have just asked, Jester. I’m always happy to oblige.”

Though Caleb was glad he didn’t have to move, that thought was not what he was expecting. That wasn’t exactly “relationship stuff,” but it might as well have been. He wasn’t exactly sure how red his cheeks were, but he knew it was more than could be permissible for just a light buzz. Taking a long sip of his champagne he tried to focus on Fjord asking Nott some truth, but didn’t even hear the answer.

“These are really good Molly. You should like, sell them, or something,” Jester said, looking at Molly’s phone from across the circle.

Caleb’s blush wouldn’t be leaving anytime soon. But he was the official timekeeper and he felt obligated to say, “It has been one minute and twelve seconds.”

“Oh, Cayyyyleb, are you _jealous?”_ Jester’s grin was too wide and too mischevious for Caleb to formulate a proper answer.

Beau punched her shoulder on her way to get another slice of pizza. “C’mon, that’s against the rules. He’s telling you the fucking time, like he always does.”

“It’s seven forty two,” he mumbled into his champagne glass, trying to make the point. He would find a way to thank Beau later. Perhaps he could save her and Yasha from the same.

Yeza very quietly said pass and no one jumped to make him. Even if that was how he’d met Nott, it probably wasn’t his favorite game. In nervous energy Caleb and Yeza were almost evenly matched.

“My turn then,” Nott said, looking around the group. “Caleb, truth or dare?”

He sighed softly, staring at her and hoping he looked adequately dead inside. “Truth.”

“Hmmmm… Who’s your bestest friend here?” she asked, a little glint in her eyes.

He rolled his. “You, Schatz.”

Nott cackled, downing the rest of her glass, “And don’t you forget it!” He thought he saw a pointed look from her to Molly, but chose to ignore that. This was her night. She could be awful as she pleased. At least they weren’t celebrating with a shoplifting spree as she’d first suggested.

And there was a pleasant warmth growing in Caleb’s chest as he realized that he and Molly were now something slightly more than friends.

“Your turn, Yash,” Beau said, poking her gently with her elbow.

She blinked. “Um… Caduceus. Truth or dare?”

He rubbed his chin, humming softly as he thought, “Truth, I think.”

“What is… your favorite type of flower?” Yasha asked, brow furrowed as she tried to think of an interesting question.

“Hmm… That’s a tricky one. I can’t pick more than one?” he asked, which launched a full conversation between the two about their favorite flowers for each season. 

Beau rolled her eyes. “Okay, okay, yes, orchids are awesome. My turn. Jester, truth or dare?”

“Dare!” she answered too quickly, grinning wide.

Looking around the room at the rest of the group, her eyes settled on Caleb with a truly delinquent look. “I dare you to switch clothes with Caleb.”

He sat up a little straighter, frowning. “But it’s not my turn.”

Caleb really just didn't want to move. At least the dress Jester was wearing looked like the stretchy kind. She was much more muscle than he could ever hope to be, but his shoulders were still broader.

Jester rolled her eyes. “I can't switch clothes with myself, Caleb. And I never back down on a dare. C’mon, we’ll go in the other room. I promise not to peek,” she said, sending a wink his way.

She grabbed his hand and dragged him away, Molly giving him a sympathetic look as he rescued the champagne flute from Caleb’s grasp.


	36. Truth or Dare

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> how many soft clichés can I pack into this fic before it descends into chaos?? the answer is always at least one more

### Chapter 36: Truth or Dare

Molly wasn’t paying attention to the game anymore. Jester had gotten dared to switch clothes with Caleb, and she was wearing a really, really cute blue dress. It was stretchy on the top and flared out at the hips, with little embroidered daisies. And they had left at least five minutes ago. It didn't take that long to change, right?

He was trying not to be obvious about his excitement for when Caleb reemerged, but probably wasn’t being that subtle. Molly was starting to worry that Caleb was uncomfortable, and feeling guilty for the anticipation coiling in his stomach. In the meantime, he’d gotten to dare Fjord to reveal the reason behind the two accents, which wasn’t as embarrassing as Molly had hoped. It was just sweet, Fjord wanting to be like his long lost father figure.

Caduceus was trying to figure out what to dare Beau to do when Jester and Caleb came back. Jester came out first, holding Caleb’s hand and dragging him alongside her. She was a bit dwarfed in his sweater and pants, but had pulled the pants up to be high waisted and belted tight over the sweater. It worked well, despite being a bit bulky.

But Caleb.

Jester had braided his hair, and he still looked a little flushed from the champagne. The dress revealed an expanse of freckles that Molly couldn't tear his eyes away from. And the truly lovely part was that he didn't actually seem uncomfortable. Frumpkin twined in between Caleb’s legs before he jumped onto the arm of the sofa, making biscuits and curling up.

With the soft blush and an equally soft smile directed at Jester, Caleb plopped down next to Molly again, still leaning against him. His hair was long enough now that Jester had taken it and made two French braids that twisted almost like a crown, showing off the smattering of freckles that hid on the nape of Caleb’s neck. Molly was trying not to stare, and trying not to react to how warm it now was to hold Caleb around the shoulders. It was harder than he thought it would be to look at anything else.

"How the hell do you look hot in Caleb’s frumpy sweaters?" Nott asked Jester, only earning a wink in response. And a half-hearted glare from Caleb.

“My sweaters are not that bad,” he said, though his heart absolutely wasn’t in it.

Molly couldn’t help himself and said, “They’re soft.”

Beau rolled her eyes from her handstand on the floor. Caduceus had just dared her to hold it as long as possible so she wouldn’t be up any time soon. She said to Caleb, "Man, it's been forever since I've seen you in a skirt. And even then you look like a librarian."

"It has been very cold. And I haven't let Jester pick my outfits in a few months," Caleb said, shrugging nonchalantly.

Jester grinned, “He looks good as a librarian! Like a sexy college professor or something!”

The conversation shifted, but Molly was rapt, watching the pink blush on Caleb’s cheeks under the freckles.

He swallowed. Caleb wasn't uncomfortable in the dress. He'd worn them before. Knowing that he didn't think clothing was gendered was surprisingly sexy. And it wasn't just because Molly saw more of his skin than usual.

Imagining pushing his hands up that skirt was something Molly couldn't get out of his head either. He could feel the heat in his cheeks as the alcohol made him think wild things. Thoughts he totally wouldn't entertain while sober. Probably.

Well, they had been getting closer over the past few weeks, despite Caleb coming home late and exhausted each night after working with Nott and Yussa. Molly was still a little worried something would happen and Caleb would bolt, so he was usually curled up in the living room in Caleb’s temporary bed half asleep by the time the wizard came home. Lots of sleepy cuddles were had, and Molly was getting used to the slow intimacy. They still hadn’t kissed since that night in Rumblecusp.

"It’s your turn Caleb; we had to skip you earlier," Fjord said.

He nodded. “Ah, well, who wants to go?”

“That’s so not how it works, Caleb.” Jester snorted.

But Yasha, saint that she was, said, “I’ll go.”

“Truth or dare?”

She thought for a moment. “Dare, I think.”

Molly was so distracted by Caleb chewing his lip he almost didn’t notice when he made the decision. “Open a beer bottle with only your feet.”

“FUCK!” Beau had finally toppled over, straight into the coffee table, probably distracted.

Yasha looked over to make sure Beau was okay, then nodded, thinking carefully. She asked, “Can I get it out of the fridge with my hands?”

“I’ll get it for you,” Beau said, standing up and looking a little too enthusiastic about the show of Yasha’s muscles and dexterity, even as she rubbed her bumped shin.

Caleb and Yasha discussed the different parameters about the dare. No shoes, socks optional, she could use her surroundings as long as it wasn’t someone else helping her, and afterwards she was more than welcome to drink said beer.

Beau put the beer down in front of Yasha’s feet. Molly noted the blue toenail polish instead of the usual black with a smile, and how she grabbed the bottle and cracked it open easily against the coffee table. Beau whooped, but got a bit flustered when Yasha twisted to present the beer to Beau, still using her feet. It was awkward as hell, but very sweet.

Fjord was asking Nott a truth then, distracting Molly from staring at Caleb. “Are you excited about changing back tomorrow?”

“I… Yeah! Of course… I mean it’s kind of scary too. It’s a big change, yeah?” she swallowed, looking at Caleb with an apologetic look. “I don’t mean that I don’t want to, or that I’m not grateful it’s happening.”

“I know, Schatz,” Caleb said, grabbing her hand and squeezing it gently. Yeza did the same on the other side of her. “It’s a lot, ja? If you want to wait or talk it out more beforehand I will understand.”

Molly could have melted into a puddle. Watching Caleb perfectly at peace, being the kind person he was, in a cute dress, it was much more than he was expecting after his boring shift at the Emporium. And tomorrow he was working at the Lavish Chateau, so he could take this night and not even worry about waking up early.

There was nothing to distract him from how cute this moment was. He went through his turn in a half haze, just asking Yasha the truth about whether or not she had stolen the last cupcake. She calmly told him that Beau had eaten it, and he couldn’t even bring himself to call her an asshole. Molly was far too happy, content to just sink back into his comfortable haze wrapped around Caleb.

Until he heard Jester say, “Caleb, I dare you to polymorph Molly into something.”

“Poly what?” Molly asked, looking at Jester. She looked far too pleased with herself.

Caleb looked bewildered, “Into what? And it lasts a whole hour; he won’t be able to play.”

“Whatever you want! We’re finishing up anyway. Like one more round for everyone?” Jester asked, looking around the room to mixed nods. It was getting a bit late. Nott still needed to have a talk with Yeza too, away from the rest of the group.

Molly was still staring at Caleb. “What does that mean?”

“It makes you into an animal for an hour. Strange spell, but I thought learning it would help with beginning to understand Nott’s transformation. What animal would you like to be?” Caleb shrugged.

This was a little much for Molly. Even sober he wasn’t sure he’d have a great answer to this question. “Surprise me.”

Caleb nodded, turning back to the group. “Molly should take his turn now then, since only Caduceus will be able to talk to him soon.”

He looked around the group. “So everyone knows what this polymorph thing is but me?”

“It’s a spell! Caduceus and I know it too,” Jester grinned.

That gave Molly an idea. “Any animal?”

“I mean an elephant might break the bed or something, but yeah!”

Molly grinned back at her. “Jester, truth or dare.”

She hummed, not realizing his plan, or liking the gleam in his eye enough not to care. “Dare! And make it good; since it’s your last one.”

“Well, it might be a little cheap, but, I dare you to polymorph Fjord. Into… a duck.”

Fjord looked nonplussed, but the blush on Jester’s cheeks was worth it. The half orc asked, “Is this safe, Jester?”

“I know you don’t do a lot of magic these days, Fjord, but the Traveler will take care of you!” she said, winking at him.

And then with a flash of green energy, Fjord was a duck.

And Molly was… something else.

For once he felt the strange arcane powers of Caleb swirling around him. It was a heady feeling, warm and distinctly Caleb, but then he just felt strange. He looked down and he was… something with paws.

Really big purple paws.

He let out a surprised noise that ended up sounding a lot like purr.

“Oh, Molly, you’re so cute!” Jester cooed, taking pictures of him and showing how he was now a large purple jaguar curled around Caleb. He liked the look of that, trying to tell her to send him the pictures and only producing a low rumbling purr.

And Caleb was staring at him. Caleb was in that beautiful dress and he was staring right at him.

Mollymauk never felt like the smartest person in a room, especially not when he was hanging out with Caleb, but he was pretty aware of the diminished level of brain capacity he seemed to be enjoying for the moment. And he was still tipsy.

He could hear a duck that was probably pretty tasty, but he was vaguely aware that it was also Fjord.

Molly was more concerned with the absolutely adorable look on Caleb’s face as he gave his head a scratch. Hitting a spot right behind his ear that was _divine_ , Caleb grinned as Molly started purring so deeply it sent tremors through the pull out bed.

People were talking, but what they were saying was mostly just a haze again, even more so now that he could barely understand them. Jester was telling Caleb she would give him his clothes back tomorrow since she was too comfy. Others were saying their goodbyes and congratulations to Nott. Before Molly knew it, people were leaving and Caleb was tipping up his chin to look in his eyes. He still had a positively enamored look on his face, and Molly was in love.

It was easier to realize that deep, powerful emotion that flooded through him when he wasn’t able to overthink it. He wanted Caleb to look at him like that all the time, with no guilt, no shame, no remorse.

But Caleb was talking. “Would you like me to change you back?”

He shook his head quickly, climbing over and draping himself across Caleb’s lap, still purring. Yasha and Beau had disappeared into Yasha’s room. They were alone.

Caleb had turned him a really beautiful shade of purple. It was like his hair when it caught the sunlight, but sleek and fuzzy all at the same time. He admired himself by extending his claws on his right paw, then the left, repeating the action and enjoying the strange feeling of extending his claws. Above him, Caleb was scratching behind his ear in that amazing spot, and Frumpkin was staring at him with a new curiosity. The bengal jumped off the arm of the couch and came forward, bumping noses with him.

Molly would have grinned, instead giving him a nice long lick.

Disgruntled, the familiar disappeared, so he went back to examining his retractable claws.

“May I?” Caleb asked softly, hand gesturing at the paws.

Molly was confused but rolled so he was on his back in Caleb’s lap, holding his paw up for Caleb to inspect. Very gingerly, Caleb took the paw in his hand, a fascination on his face that Molly had only ever seen when he was busy with research. With great care he took each toe pad and squished it, very gently, a small grin spreading across his face with each one. Once he finished, he moved to the other paw. It was a strange sensation that sent little shivers down Molly’s spine, but the look of elation on Caleb’s face was worth anything.

“Frumpkin hates it when I do this,” he mumbled. “Oh, if you hate it, I can stop,” he said quickly, a look of concern crossing his face and taking away the calm elation. Molly’s heart lurched and he tried to find a way to tell him he would do this for hours. He settled for purring louder and nuzzling into him, which at this angle meant pressing his face into Caleb’s stomach. The soft fabric of the dress was pleasant against his nose and he was completely comfortable. 

All too soon, he was a tiefling again, unable to purr quite like the jungle cat. But he had his tattoos back, and he was still lying in Caleb’s lap.

“Willkommen zurück,” Caleb said, still holding Molly’s hand. But he wasn’t squeezing his fingers, he was staring deeply at Molly’s tattoos, twisting them so they caught the light.

If Molly could still purr, he definitely would be, enjoying the strange new tingling sensation as Caleb ran his fingers over the tattoo that snaked (literally and figuratively) up his arm. “You’re lucky that’s a cognate.”

“You’re lucky I told you what a cognate was,” Caleb said, still looking over the tattoos.

Suddenly, with his full cognition and almost all the alcohol out of his system, Molly felt a little nervous about the scrutiny. Caleb looked like he was studying him like a textbook, something you could make a list of pros and cons for and decide whether or not it was any good. “Are my tattoos that interesting? You’ve seen them before.”

But instead of deciding his tattoos were too much, telling Molly he was too loud, or even asking about the eyes that wouldn’t take ink, Caleb just blushed that delicious pink. “Ich… Well, yes? I… like them.”

“Yeah?” Molly asked, really wishing he could purr. Caleb seemed to like that, to understand that.

“Wie sagt man… I suppose they’re like grounding. I like details. Focusing on the details of something is relaxing.” Caleb wouldn’t meet his eyes, but still stared at the tattoos.

Molly didn’t want to break the spell of the moment, but still wanted to give Caleb full access. So he very carefully pulled his shirt off, throwing it on the floor and lying back across Caleb’s lap. “I’ve been thinking about getting another one, but haven’t decided yet.”

“What would you get?”

“Maybe something from my tarot cards, but I’d need to think about it for a while.” He shrugged, not able to think very coherently with Caleb’s fingers tracing over the ink on his chest. The tender look he had on his face as he moved upwards and traced the peacock on his cheek was making Molly melt.

He was gentle and methodical, now rubbing along each of Molly’s scars. Molly was trying his best not to shudder at the light touches, but it was getting increasingly difficult. Especially since he was now tracing the designs and marks down his torso and abdomen.

A particularly sensitive part made him squirm, and he bit his lip to avoid making a sound.

“Mollymauk?”

“Hm?” he blinked, looking up.

Caleb was staring down at him. He hadn’t realized he had moved further up on the arm of the couch so that Caleb could reach down all the tattoos on his chest. They were very close. Enough for a light flush to come to Molly’s cheeks.

“May I kiss you?”

Molly’s heart leapt into his chest. “Of course. Of course you can. Any time.” 

There was a moment of hesitation before Caleb started tracing over the peacock feathers on his cheek again. The gentle kiss they shared was a little awkward because of the position, but Molly didn’t care. He cared more about the warmth, sitting up a little further so Caleb didn’t have to crane his neck.

He couldn’t help but to grin, “You’re really adorable in a dress.”

“You make a very fine cat.” Caleb smiled back at him.

Molly rolled his eyes, “I’m very glad you liked me better as an animal.”

Caleb almost snorted, “I think you should stop being foolish before I get fed up and kick you out of bed.”

“Well, that’s certainly not allowed, because I’m really enjoying my seat.” Molly made a point to wiggle a bit in Caleb’s lap. A sound that came from deep within Caleb’s chest made Molly raise a brow. Before the redhead could get too embarrassed Molly dove back in for a deeper kiss.

He might not be able to tell Caleb he loved him, but this was pretty nice too.


	37. Failures and Journeys

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> more angst! get ready for the shit show!!

### Chapter 37: Failures and Journeys

_Thank you, Caleb, for getting me this far and for devoting yourself to me. You're a good man and I-- I hope you find where you're going, too._

Caleb had failed Nott.

His spell didn’t work.

Years of research, and he still couldn’t help Nott get back to being Veth. Not while she was still cursed. Even Yussa didn’t have a wish spell that would be necessary to remove this curse without visiting the woman from Nott’s memory.

But he couldn’t feel sorry for himself when she needed him to be strong, now more than ever. He brought her close, getting himself covered in clay, and whispered reassurances in her ear. They would fix this. They would find the old woman or hag or whatever she was and they would fix this.

He had to fix this.

She had traveled this far with him, and he would travel to the ends of the Earth for her. Even if it meant leaving the rest of the group for a time.

“I will text them and let them know to meet us at the bookstore, ja?” Caleb said, pulling back. “You can take a minute to clean up. Well, I guess you’ll need a new bathtub, but the sink should do for now. Would you like me to tell Yeza?”

Nott chewed her lip, and Caleb could tell she’d need a minute alone very soon. “You can tell him it didn’t work. I’ll tell him I’m leaving. Fair?”

“Of course, Schatz. I’ll get you some clean clothes too.” He kissed her forehead, wandering out and letting her husband know the disappointing news while he grabbed her a freshly laundered set of clothes to change into. It was weird speaking alone with Yeza, when Nott was his oldest and dearest friend. But he’d gotten over a lot of that awkwardness years ago. They could hold a decent conversation now, even if this one was about how he had failed.

Nott slipped out to explain the rest to Yeza, and Caleb told her he would meet her at the bookstore. He texted everyone quickly and slipped out of her apartment. He also needed a moment to be alone.

To ruminate on how foolish he had been.

He should have known that it would be harder than just developing the spell. Caleb had been so wrapped up in the arcane means, he hadn’t realized a hag’s curse was worse than anything else. There was a reason Jester had never been able to fix Nott’s body before. It was pure arrogance to think he could do any better.

And that’s how he ended up sitting on the couch in his office, head in his hands, not even hearing Mollymauk knocking or coming in.

“I take it something didn’t go quite right?” he asked, voice soft enough not to completely jar Caleb out of his unpleasant musings.

Caleb just nodded, not looking up. He wasn’t really looking his best, still covered in clay that he couldn’t get off in the employee bathroom. Molly settled onto the couch beside him, wrapping an arm around his shoulders. “Do you want to talk about it?”

“Might as well wait for everyone.” His voice sounded hollow. He would need to work on that before Nott arrived again. Even with Yeza and Luc there as moral support, she would need him to be more optimistic and enthusiastic than this. Especially since he would be the one going with her. Especially since it was his fault she got her hopes up.

Especially since it was his fault everything failed.

It was like Molly could read his mind. He supposed he was a little predictable in that way, at times. “Whatever happened, it’s not your fault. It’s just going to take more time, right?”

He sighed, shaking his head. “I shouldn’t have gotten her hopes up.”

“You were both excited. You should still be excited! You’re closer to it now, right?” Molly rubbed his shoulder, pulling him closer into his chest and kissing his temple, just a light brush.

Caleb felt a knot settling in his stomach as he fully realized how much it would hurt to leave this easy intimacy with Mollymauk behind. At the very least, he’d gotten up the courage to kiss him last night.

He couldn’t bring himself to say it, but Molly didn’t press. That was a blessing.

Soon they were sitting upstairs in the café, explaining how it didn’t work and how Nott and Caleb would need to leave to fix things with this hag. Everyone had shown up, and Caleb had even called Calianna upstairs to explain how he wouldn’t be able to take his usual shifts. Yussa didn’t seem to mind when Caleb had called him, so long as he kept an eye out for any strange arcane objects along the way. Beau spoke up about the hag, a theory she’d developed with Nott about how her father had talked to the same weird old woman.

“So, Nott and I will need to leave for some time, to search out this old woman who presumably gave Beau’s father his fortune and cursed Veth to be a goblin,” Caleb said, looking over at Nott, who sat with Luc up in her lap. Yeza held one of her hands. “We’ll probably need to be gone for a few weeks. I cannot teleport us straight to the mountains, so we will need to go some of the way on foot.”

“Just like old times,” Nott said, patting Caleb’s knee.

“I’ll tell my job that I need leave, then,” Beau said nonchalantly, looking upset when others seemed shocked. “What? That fucker messed with my family too. If we’re going to kill her or make a deal with her or whatever, I want to be there.”

“I will also come. I’ve been in one place too long.” Yasha said, ignoring Caleb’s pointed look to question ulterior motives. It was probably a good thing she and Beau had gotten so close, but they still refused to talk about it.

Molly sat up, “Well if it’s going to be that kind of a party, you won’t be leaving me behind.” Caleb’s heart lurched, and he could barely tear his eyes away from Molly’s grin as the others stepped up as well.

“Of course! People will miss the bakery, but it will be there when we get back. And momma will be fine with you guys taking a break from the Chateau for this; it’s important!” Jester wrapped an arm around Molly’s shoulders, grinning just as wide.

“Fjord and I have talked about making a pilgrimage to the Wildmother’s Menagerie together. I have a feeling that’s where I need to be soon.” Caduceus sat up a bit straighter, looking over at the half orc in question. “This could be a good start to that journey.”

“I mean, it’s halfway across the continent, but sure.” Fjord shrugged, willing enough to go along with the madness, especially if it brought him further away from that weird underwater cult. One of the members, Avantica something, had been bothering him again. Caleb was a little concerned about them all getting close to that, but it didn’t sound like anything they couldn’t handle as a group. Fjord’s demons didn’t sound half as terrifying as his own, even if they were some level of divine. Was it divinity if it was evil? He really didn't understand how deities and patrons worked.

“I’d be more than happy to watch the shop for you, Mr. Caleb,” Calianna said, smiling a soft smile. Caleb knew her adventuring days were over. To be perfectly honest, he was shocked anyone had volunteered to join him and Nott.

Yasha nodded, “I could ask Reani to scry and teleport us there. She can walk through trees.”

Everyone was immediately enamored with the idea, Jester figuring out how to set up a ritual to scry on the old woman and see if they could figure out exactly where she was from. Calianna slipped back downstairs to open up the shop again with the assurance that Caleb trusted her to run things while he was away.

Caleb put a hand on Nott’s shoulder. “With the lot of us, there is no way we can fail.”

Nott grinned, nodding and beginning to talk things out with Yeza, making sure he wouldn’t be too overwhelmed. Caleb sank back down into his seat in the café, looking up when Molly placed a cup of espresso in front of him. He really did feel the exhaustion creeping in.

“Did you really think we would let you two go off running straight into danger without the rest of your family?” Molly asked, sitting next to Caleb at the table.

“I… well. Ja.” Caleb blinked, looking over at the tiefling. He wasn’t sure which surprised him more, the mention of their friends being his family, or how they weren’t going to let him try and take on a hag on his own. 

It made sense, since he and Nott weren’t the sturdiest of the group, but he still expected to go alone. Nott was the only constant in his life. The others coming with… it was a very pleasant surprise. His mind echoed that he didn’t deserve it, but he could push that voice down. He could name his old guilt and let his friends act of their own free will. He wasn’t keeping secrets from them any longer. They had made their own decisions to help him, help Nott, and he would let them.

It didn’t stop him from being surprised, but he could let them do what they wanted. Of course, he would have been concerned if they weren’t all accomplished fighters. He knew everyone’s skills besides Fjord, but he had heard enough of the man’s stories to not be concerned that the half orc would be joining them. If he could fight off weird cultists, he could come with them.

Molly didn’t say anything, but took his hand and squeezed it. The knot in Caleb’s stomach that had emerged earlier that day when he thought he would have to leave everyone behind in Nicodranas began to unravel.

Jester had contacted Reani and she’d rushed over, talking over the plan and figuring out which one of them would scry. They both hadn’t used much of their magic, deciding that Jester would scry on the woman and draw a picture so Reani could scry on the area to look for a tree. It was a tentative plan, highly subject to change. But it was a plan, and therefore better than nothing.

Nott was currently transforming herself into the image of the hag, albeit taking some liberties, but Caleb was still lost in thought.

The ten minutes it took to scry gave him a moment of relative silence to figure out what he would need for the journey. He still had his tiny hut spell if they needed to go camping along the way, which would be likely since Reani would only be able to teleport them once a day. Pumat might be able to hook them up with a few healing potions, even though that wasn’t his specialty anymore after starting the trauma therapy group.

His last one was used in the graveyard, and he would definitely need more. For himself and for Nott. And maybe Molly. He wrote up a quick text for Pumat asking for them, ignoring the pointed questions about how he’d missed the last few group sessions. The research had only taken over his life a little bit. And even if he had failed, it seemed they were on the home stretch.

Yasha and Beau were looking at some discounted camping gear for them all online, Beau still eager to waste the rest of her dad’s Winter’s Crest money. The aasimar was looking positively enamored as Beau was raving about a solar panel they could bring to charge all their phones that would fit over a backpack. Caleb wondered if he looked like that when he looked at Molly.

He was brought out of his thoughts when Jester pulled back from her spell, shrinking in on herself. Caleb frowned, moving a bit out of his seat as she started to speak.

“Oh my god. She's so scary, she's so scary. She knew I was there, she knew I was scrying on her. Oh my god.” Jester was trying to control her breathing again, a panicked look on her face.

Nott sat up from her chair, pacing towards her. “Did she threaten you? Did she see you? Did she know who you are?”

Jester shook her head. “I don't know. I don't know if she saw me, I don't know if she saw who I was, I don't know, I don't know. She just said that she thought she was going to have company, because she saw that I was looking at her. She had really long hands and long arms, and she's scary as fuck.”

“Well, there goes the element of surprise,” Caleb said, rubbing his chin and trying to settle the new feeling of panic.

Reani looked worried for the group, giving Jester a reassuring hug, “Gosh, I wish I could go with you guys! I’m sure you’ll be fine though, you’re all, like super strong!”

Jester nodded, shaking away some of the earlier fears. Caleb wasn’t so sure, but he couldn’t quite worry about it. 

It took a while for them to decide on where to teleport to. In the end they chose the nearest town, hoping to get some vehicles or horses to take into the woods. They didn’t want to teleport themselves directly into a trap, and that way they could get the lay of the land before encountering the hag. Slowly they gathered more information, finding out the hag’s name was likely Isharnai, and the territory she lived in was extremely dangerous, full of monsters and undead.

It was probably a good thing that the others decided to come with, though Caleb doubted they could move very stealthily through the woods together.

It certainly wasn’t a perfect plan, but they had little else to go on. Reani managed to scry on a good area after finding some good pictures online, and Beau ordered the camping gear with a rush delivery to arrive in two days.

Nott shuffled over to him, asking about how he felt about going back to the empire. Caleb just ruffled Nott’s hair and tried to keep her distracted with noncommittal answers. She was more on edge these past few days than he’d seen her act in years, and he could only imagine it would get worse once they left. She wasn’t just changing back, she was confronting her past in a visceral way. The more distracted Nott was, the less intent she was on sneaking sips from her flask.

They could distract themselves. And Caleb could focus on helping her, since they weren’t about to walk into Ikithon's Tower in Ambition's Call.

He wasn’t about to face his own past, and hopefully he never would.


	38. Welcome to the Empire

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Drinking isn't a healthy coping mechanism, kids! Always keep a healer on hand!!

###  Chapter 38: Welcome to the Empire 

Reani had teleported them through a palm tree on the side of the beach in Nicodranas. Molly was able to say goodbye to the ocean and the warming weather before he stepped through the split trunk and felt the damp chill of the Dwendalian Empire in early spring.

The small town they ended up in was barely a blip on the map. Molly saw more horse carts than actual cars on the streets, and the cell reception was absolutely dreadful. It was almost as if they had stepped back in time. Still, he was getting a lot of good pictures of the group. Caleb had perked up a bit after everyone decided to come with him to find this weird hag lady, and Molly was very happy that kissing seemed to be on the table now, even if the wizard seemed more on edge now that they were back in the Empire. The man hadn’t taken his hood off since they got there.

He wasn’t going to question the kissing being brought on by him being turned into a large cat. Molly could deal with that. It wasn’t like Caleb didn’t stop and kiss Frumpkin on the head a lot. It might have seemed more casual. But it had opened the door for Molly to kiss Caleb on the cheek and temple whenever he passed by and they were alone. And that was lovely.

Molly was disappointed they had to leave, honestly. It was much easier to steal the occasional kiss when they were in his apartment. Caleb and Nott were both acting like something was hiding and waiting for them in every shadow, even with everyone around them. Molly had seen Caleb trying to hide it, taking care of Nott instead, but he couldn’t stop being jumpy.

The inn they’d found to crash at for the night and plan for meeting the weird old witch was very very small. Beau and Yasha had seen a few cute pictures online, but when they arrived there was only one room available. No one was really excited to rough it just yet, so they all crammed inside, threw their new sleeping bags down on the floor and asked for as many extra pillows as the front desk agent could find.

One bathroom for eight people was a lot, but Molly knew he was probably the worst one. He could just wait until most people went to bed.

Sleeping on the floor was another issue. As soon as they set up the bags he was starting to regret it. It felt too much like sleeping in the dirt, even though the floor was probably harder than soil. And with everyone else in the room, Caleb had left a small gap between their sleeping bags.

There would be little in terms of comfort tonight.

“Anyone want to go drinking downstairs at the hotel bar? Take the edge off?” Beau asked, looking around for consensus.

Molly grinned, “Absolutely.” That would definitely help him get to sleep that night, even if it wasn’t the healthiest.

Everyone eventually filed back down the stairs, excited to have a night of revelry before doing something terrifying. The bar in the back of the inn was surprisingly crowded, the bartender grinning at them.

“Welcome, welcome, sit anywhere you can find a seat. Are you folks from out of town?”

Fjord nodded, striking up a casual conversation with the dwarven gentleman before he came back to the group. “Sounds like there’s a drinking contest. You guys up for it? Groups of five he said. Whoever puts up the biggest pot gets to take on the champs from last week.”

“Sounds like fun!” Jester grinned, rifling for her coin purse.

Nott asked, “But Jester, you don’t drink.”

“Oh, but don’t you want to?” She looked around at the group, having made a very correct assumption. “You can just go win my money back. This way it’s just like gambling for me, not drinking.”

“I can just watch too,” Caduceus said, sitting beside Jester. Yasha joined them as well, a bit on edge. As far as Molly could tell, she seemed to be strung out trying to keep an eye on the whole big group in a strange new place. But things seemed fine so far, especially with Caleb willing to join in the fun.

The previous champions were lined up against the far wall, grinning and looking at the townspeople for a challenge. There was a dwarven man with a huge salt and pepper beard and a long scar through one eye, a burly looking human woman with a buzz cut, a goliath woman already nursing a beer and speaking with an elven man, and a loxodon leaning against the wall.

With thirty gold on the table and the rest of the town eager to see the newcomers face off against the old champions, they were getting ready.

“What’s your group name?” the dwarven bartender asked, leaning over to them and looking impatient.

Everyone floundered for a moment before Beau spoke up, "Caleb, think of a cool Zemnian name."

He said, “The Mighty Nein. Nein like the Zemnian, like ‘n,’ ‘e,’ ‘i-’”

The bartender cut him off, “Here we have the Mighty Nein!”

“Why Mighty Nein? There’s eight of us. And only five can compete,” Beau said, frowning at him.

Caleb shrugged, “It’s a pun. And Frumpkin counts.” The cat let out a soft meow from his perch in Caleb’s arms as Beau rolled her eyes.

Molly snorted and wrapped an arm around his shoulders. “Caleb, how’re you feeling? Up to compete?”

“I don’t think I should go late in the game, but I feel capable of this challenge,” Caleb said, nodding. Molly couldn’t help but to grin, giving Frumpkin a little scritch instead of kissing the wizard on the cheek like he so desperately wanted to. He was pleased to see Caleb relaxing a bit, even as he went over to Jester and made her promise not to let them all fall asleep face down in the gutter.

Offering to break the ice and go first, Molly stood up and grinned at the goliath woman who took the seat in front of him. He leapt over the chair, crossing his legs prettily and batting his eyelashes at the woman. She scoffed at him, but they didn’t have long to focus on each other before tankards were placed down in front of them, a deep red gold liquid that Molly hadn’t seen before.

They downed the drinks together, Molly taking in the flavor that was quite like beer but burned much stronger. They kept neck and neck until the woman let out a little cough, then pitched over into a well placed bucket. Molly was swaying on his feet when he tried to stand victorious, grinning as the cheers swelled around him. 

He stumbled back to the floor, cheering on Beau as she got up to take his place. But the Loxodon she was up against was keeping pace, until they’d both drunk three more than Molly had to and Beau had to head for the bucket to avoid making a mess on the table.

The elven man stood next, going to sit at the table and Caleb moved to join them after depositing Molly with Yasha so he didn’t fall over. Molly let out a few whoops, snickering quietly as Caleb had a polite conversation with the man, introducing himself.

The man grinned and shook his hand, “May the best elf win.”

Caleb frowned, “Pleasure to meet you as well. Did you say may the best elf win?”

“Yes,” he said with an innocent smile, taking his seat with a grace that made Molly want to tip him out of it.

Thankfully before he could say anything Nott shouted, “He’s trash talking you, don’t listen to him, Caleb!”

“Don’t let him get in your head!” Fjord joined in, clapping Nott on the shoulder and urging him on.

Caleb grabbed the tankard and downed it before the elf, slamming it down on the table. Molly cheered, wincing as the next two glasses went down much harder, the wizard coughing a bit and taking a breath before the next one.

But the elf didn’t look too good either, beginning to sway in his seat. They took another two drinks before the elf threw the drink down cheering his victory and toppling out of his seat, blacking out and landing on the floor. A cheer rose around the bar for Caleb who was now looking just as drunk as Beau, his face ever so slightly green.

Molly caught him, laughing heartily and pulling him close, not even having the consciousness to stop himself from kissing the wizard on the top of the head.

Fjord won his competition against the burly human, drinking her under the table and rising to a victorious shout. They’d already won, but the dwarf with the scar challenged them, double or nothing, all riding on Nott’s shoulders.

And Nott showed off, drinking with her mage hand and slamming each drink down, making it her night and sending the crowd into an uproar as they walked away with a nice sack of gold for their trouble. Not to mention extremely drunk, none more than the two humans. Fjord was keeping Beau upright and Molly was still making sure Caleb didn’t fall over.

Beau was talking with Caleb, and Molly was enjoying the two stumbling over their words. Until Caleb asked if he was as drunk as Beau and she answered, “I dunno, can you feel this?”

And she tried to slap Caleb across the face, to which Molly snatched him out of the way, landing them both in a confused pile on a nearby table, laughing out of their minds. Caleb started singing a strange song, and Molly was even more sure that he was in love with this ridiculous man.

Caduceus congratulated them on winning, but as soon as they sat down at their old table the firbolg started praying for healing for the group, taking a bit of the pain away but leaving the haze behind. “Maybe we shouldn’t make a habit of this,” he said softly, patting a very drunk Beau on the back.

She only groaned in response, but Molly guessed the message would be taken to heart.

For a few hours they sat and joked around, enjoying the company and eating a ridiculous amount of appetizers, all on the house for winning the competition. Caleb was relaxing, hood down and still completely blasted. Molly was just enjoying the intimacy that allowed, practically getting in the man’s lap and making sure he was drinking his weight in water and eating as many garlic fries as humanly possible.

Late into the night when Molly was starting to fade from his drunken stupor to just pleasantly buzzed, Caleb froze in his seat, eyes locked on the door. Molly looked up to see two individuals walking in, wearing fine clothes, tailored suits of some kind, and each carrying some sort of wands or arcane focuses at their hips. He could hear the Zemnian accents from across the room, now that the rowdy crowd was dying down.

About to ask who they were and if they needed to get ready for a fight, he heard Caleb mumble a quiet spell, and suddenly there was a little russet colored mouse racing up Molly’s coat. Hiding within the folds of his collar and lapel, the mouse stuck its nose out, just watching.

Molly watched them carefully, mumbling, “If you want to leave, give me a sign. Otherwise we can watch.”

The wizard turned mouse settled down further, seemingly content to watch. “Just let me know.”

Nott was watching the whole thing carefully, yellow eyes trained on the two mages that had walked in. Beauregard had noticed as well, but Fjord was doing a good job keeping up appearances with Yasha, talking about their various experiences up and down the Menagerie Coast. Caduceus seemed to notice something was off but didn’t say anything, Jester busy carving a dick in the table beside him. Molly did his best to act casual as well, asking Nott quietly about her flask that seemed bottomless.

Eventually the strangers turned and left, the mouse slipping down off his shoulder and moving to Nott’s. They disappeared upstairs, Nott almost melting into the shadows. That was fine. Molly needed to talk to the bartender anyways. 

He leaned over the bar, ordering one last shot. So much for an easy night’s sleep.

“So, you remember everyone in our group?” Molly asked the bartender, the same portly dwarven fellow who was busy cleaning up the counter.

He nodded, “I’ve got a good memory. You, another tiefling, three humans, a firbolg, a half orc, and a goblin girl. Don’t worry, we don’t judge here, yeah? Especially when they can drink the locals under the table like the best of them!”

“The human man, real short with brown hair, brown eyes, right?” Molly asked, taking out his coin purse. He figured he couldn’t cover everything up since they’d caught everyone’s attention with the drinking competition, but he could try for a little damage control.

The man raised a brow. “Oh?”

“A ginger guy with freckles in a brown coat? Never seen him before, right?” Molly asked, starting to count gold pieces.

He caught on then, throwing the rag over his shoulder. “Never seen anyone with that description in my life.”

Molly nodded, leaving two piles of ten coins on the bar. “Good man. And could you perhaps pass that message along to some of our friends who saw the drinking competition?”

“Of course,” the man nodded, eyes wide as Molly kept piling gold on the counter. “They’re mostly all too drunk to notice any specific details anyways.”

“Do you think you can just keep any rumors from spreading? Especially to any out of towners?” Molly asked.

The man nodded quickly, staring at the gold like his mouth would begin watering at any second. Molly was just glad he’d grabbed a bunch of dough out of the bank before coming. And had won the money from the competition.

“Perfect. We’ll be leaving early tomorrow morning.” Molly stepped back a bit.

The man scooped up the coins, nodding. “I’ll get some breakfast for you folks, yeah?”

Grinning, Molly nodded, “Sounds perfect. We’ll see you then.”

He slipped back upstairs and spent time in the bathroom, brushing the booze out of his mouth and taking a long hot shower since he wouldn’t be able to for the next few days, presumably. Molly got into his sleeping bag, watching Caleb methodically wrap a silver wire around the perimeter of the room. The wizard’s hands were shaking gently as he cast the spell, finally coming back and sitting on top of his sleeping bag.

Molly bit his lip, grabbing a blanket from the closet to throw over Caleb so he could still get up quickly.

“Danke,” he mumbled, curling up facing Molly, or more likely, the door.

Whispering as the rest of the room descended into snores, Molly asked, “Can I help?”

“I’m fine.”

“I know. Can I make it better though?” Molly rephrased, reaching over and catching Caleb’s hand.

Caleb swallowed, staring at their entwined hands. “Will you wake up if I let go of your hand?”

He nodded, “I can do that. You know I’m a pretty light sleeper.”

“Gut. I might be… They… If I let go, something is wrong. Ja?” he mumbled, looking lost.

Molly nodded again. “I won’t let go unless something is wrong too.”

He could hear the slow in breathing that told him Caleb had finally fallen asleep before he managed to doze off on the hard floor. Sleep came to him in hazy waves, but he woke up every once in a while, making sure he was still holding Caleb’s hand and everyone was safe.


	39. Sheiße

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Caleb ruminates, Beau does her best

###  Chapter 39: Sheiße 

Caleb was trying not to panic.

Somewhere in this town there were two Volstrucker, a man and a woman. The man had made direct eye contact with Caleb before he managed to polymorph himself. He was cursing himself for not making himself invisible. He was cursing himself for letting his guard down, for joining a fucking drinking contest of all things.

He was cursing himself for staying, but he needed to be here with Nott.

Caleb also very much didn’t want to die.

Molly had agreed to hold his hand in case anything was wrong, and he’d set up the alarm around the room. But he knew. He knew they could dispel his flimsy spell, even though he’d cast it a bit stronger than usual, and cast a silence spell. They could knock him out and use dimension door to take him away before he could make a peep. He knew how they typically operated on missions, one who could sneak them both in and one with enough muscle to get them out. Astrid and Wulf had been good at that. At least he hoped these two wouldn’t make a fuss. He hoped his friends could sleep through it, not get hurt.

The only thing he could really hope for was that they were waiting to hear from Ikithon to figure out what to do to him, not waiting for him just outside the door of the inn.

And maybe he could hope that he’d be alone when Ikithon finally found him.

A fitful sleep found him after Molly took his hand, with Caleb waking more than a few times, heart pounding in his chest. At least when he dreamt in this state he never called out. Even in dreams he was terrified to be found. He could grit his teeth and accept the pain shooting through old scars in silence. Molly’s hand was a warm tether as he grounded himself with the soft snoring of Nott and Jester.

Eventually it was morning enough (5:37 am), and Caleb couldn’t stand it anymore. He tried to draw his hand out of Molly’s carefully, wanting to let the tiefling sleep, but he woke with a start. He shot upright, looking around the room frantically.

Caleb cursed himself for yet another thing in his head. He couldn’t do anything right. “Sorry, sorry, I’m fine. Just going to the bathroom. I tried not to wake you.”

He saw the purple shoulders sink back, relaxing. “Right, so nothing’s wrong?”

“Ja, I’m fine,” Caleb mumbled, leaning closer for a moment since they were unobserved for the first time in over a day.

Molly slung his arm lazily around his waist and pressed a light kiss into Caleb’s temple. “Good. Wake me if you need anything, okay?”

Caleb nodded, though he knew he probably wouldn’t, not unless he had to. Molly deserved his sleep. It was agony to pull away from the quiet intimacy Mollymauk gave him, nuzzling lightly into the crook of his neck and yawning. But he had to let him sleep. He couldn’t be selfish, not now. Carefully he moved himself through the tangled mess of bodies that were his sleeping friends, smiling softly at how they had all sprawled across the floor. Jester, Nott, and Beau had claimed the bed, but the human was leaning against it, scrawling in one of her notebooks.

Once they made eye contact she stood up, inclining her head to the bathroom. It was a clear message: we need to talk.

The door closed behind them and Caleb went straight to the sink, splashing cold water over his face. It was painfully cold, adding a new sensation to focus on for his frayed nerves.

“Who the fuck were they?”

“Volstrucker,” he mumbled, halfways stumbling back until he hit the wall of the small room.

Beau’s hand froze over her notes. “Fuck.”

“Ja,” he said, sinking along the wall with his head in his hands until he was curled in on himself.

“Do you like… want a hug?” Beau asked, shifting awkwardly.

Caleb shook his head. “Nein.” He wanted to curl up in a ball and cease to exist. Even if that was impossible, he wasn’t sure he wanted to be touched.

“Did you know them?”

“Nein. They must be newer,” Caleb mumbled, though he felt a pang of fear at the thought of Wulf and Astrid traveling in disguise. They had no need to. They were ghosts. But a lot could change in nine years.

She sank beside him instead, flipping through her notes. “You know I can read lips, yeah? I didn’t get everything, but they were just asking about a room for the night. I don’t think they noticed you before you disappeared. At least they didn’t mention it.”

“The man saw me. We made eye contact, and then he saw I was gone. I should have… I don’t know. Done something different. I never should have let my guard down like that. Not here.”

She sighed, “I mean maybe it would have been fine and he wouldn’t have recognized you, but it makes sense to hide. They said they would keep going through the night since they couldn’t stay here, and I don’t think they were lying. Do you think they’re really gone?”

“I don’t know.” Caleb’s mind was racing, but coherent thoughts weren’t exactly forming.

“ Is there anything we can do?” Beau asked, looking up from her notebook.

He just shook his head again. “I don’t know. If they come to fight us… I’m afraid we won’t see it coming. I don’t want any of you to get hurt.”

“You know we can take care of ourselves.”

“I know you can. These people… they are different. Vicious. They have nothing to lose but their pride. As much as I love our little family… They are not trained assassins.”

Beau snorted. “I mean, me and you are. Kinda. And Yasha. Hell, even Fjord.”

“That is not the same. None of us finished our training. Even you ran from the Cobalt Soul.” Caleb knew Jester, Nott, and Molly could defend themselves, but the thought of them fighting the horrible people he’d grown up with made his stomach turn.

She made a face, opening her notes for something to look at. “I talk to Dairon. Sometimes.”

“Right. My point stands.” Caleb scratched his hair, wondering if he could calm down enough to take a shower. It might relax him, but the thought of being caught naked by the Volstrucker quickly squashed that idea. Washing his face would have to do.

Beau sighed. “So we’ll be prepared, yeah? We can tell everyone who they were, and we’ll all be on guard. Between you, Cad, and me, we should see them coming.”

Caleb chewed his lip. Even with all of them looking out for the Volstrucker it was unlikely that he would be able to draw a teleportation circle before they arrived. They would surely be able to dispel any magical barrier he made to keep them at bay.

The only thing he could think to do would be to subdue his friends and surrender himself. He could hold back five of them if he used all his power on Hold Person, if the spell worked, hopefully long enough for the Volstrucker to be done with it and go. Caleb couldn’t let his friends hurt themselves over him. None of them deserved to suffer because of him.

“Hey.” Beau shoved his shoulder. “It’s gonna be fine, yeah? I mean it’s been like nine years, right? Who knows if they actually recognized you, or if he’s even still looking.”

“Ja,” he mumbled. Hopefully Trent had dismissed him as another failure. Assumed that he couldn’t scry on him because he was dead. That would be good. “Maybe.”

She patted him twice on the back and slipped back out. Neither of them were great with words, but Caleb knew she meant well. The thought of his friends trying to defend him against the Volstrucker, however, only filled him with dread.

All he could do was push down the dread and get ready for the day.

Even if it was only 6:12.

He would head downstairs and assess the damage. He would see if the two had truly left the tavern and he would take a walk to where the Mighty Nein would be acquiring the horses to see if the scourgers were somewhere lying in wait. 

Biting his lip, he thought back to his promise to Mollymauk.

There was no way to warn him if Caleb would be leaving by force. But there had to be a way Caleb could say goodbye. He didn’t want to break this promise, though his word meant little.

He scribbled out the note in Infernal, knowing no one could read it but Molly or Jester. Around his neck the pendant that protected him from scrying was heavy and cool, grounding him as he worried the silver surface and broke through his own alarm. Beau watched him go, nodding once. She trusted him. Caleb turned away into the hall. They all seemed to trust him, far too much. Their trust was ungrounded, and it made his stomach turn. Caleb went down to the bar, seeing the man from last night starting to set up some breakfast. 

“Ah, the man who was never here!” the man said, winking at him.

Caleb blinked. So that’s what Molly was doing last night. “Ja, thank you.”

“Please, take some food. Your friend paid in advance.”

He grabbed a roll and passed the paper to him. “If I’m not back by the time my friends leave, could you give this to the purple tiefling?”

“Can do.”

Hopefully with a message not to go looking for him, Molly could let him go. At the very least, he could get Beau or Yasha or Fjord to stop him. The rational ones in the group, the ones he’d told more about the scourgers to. They’d stop him for sure.

He disguised himself as a human woman and took a slow walk through the town, sitting on the bench outside the inn and casting a ritual to detect magic. At least he could get some indication if the Volstrucker were disguising themselves too, trying to sneak up and take him quickly.

The first few bites of the roll sent him retching, diving for the nearest alleyway. Caleb threw down the roll to some birds instead, unable to help from wondering if they were familiars.

But as he walked through the town and nothing caught his attention, he began to calm, ever so slightly. If the Volstrucker wanted him, they probably would have made a move by now. They would have seen through his disguise. They would have had the chance to kill or capture him ten times over. Chewing his lip, Caleb realized it was now getting closer to seven. Pumat was an early riser. Caleb knew that. Pumat had told him he was free to call whenever he had a moment. Caleb knew that too. His memory was impeccable. 

Still, he couldn’t bring himself to call.

Instead he focused on his breathing, taking slow steps until he reached the edge of town and found nothing worrisome. Quietly, under his breath he counted the seconds in Zemnian, trying to get out of his head and do some level of walking meditation.

_Eins, zwei, drei, vier…_

He was mostly just pacing but with intention. It was better than flashbacks. He could deal with this.

Caleb had to be strong anyways, to help Nott take on this hag. Later he could worry about his own past, so long as it wasn’t going to sneak up on him as soon as he set foot in the street. Which he had clearly proven wasn’t the case.

It would be best to go back to the hotel and get the note back from the bartender before Molly saw it. Still, it took another few minutes (17 exactly) for him to get up the courage to walk back to the inn. 

When he walked back into the inn Yasha was in the foyer, on the phone. “Thanks again for looking after Yarrow, Reani. Yeah, I know. I still appreciate it. I’ll let you know when we’re headed back.”

Caleb slipped past her, finding everyone sitting around a table eating some of the pastries the bartender had laid out for them. Nott was complaining that they weren’t as good as the ones she and Jester made at the shop, but Jester was just busy shoving some into her haversack.

Caleb nodded to the bartender. “I’ll take the note back. I might need it later.” The man fished through his pockets and gave him back the slip of paper.

He folded it once more so the name “Mollymauk” written on the outside was hidden and slipped it into his pocket so he could drop it if need be.

If he believed any gods hadn’t forsaken him, he might have prayed to never need it. Caleb was never that optimistic.


	40. On the Road

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Nein go camping! It is unpleasant at best!

### Chapter 40: On the Road

Nott and Jester had braided flowers into Caleb’s hair and Mollymauk was ridiculously in love. Of course he wouldn’t say anything until he thought Caleb was ready, but with his hair shining with golden highlights in the sunshine, woven with little buttercups and red anemones, Molly knew.

He asked Yasha to do the same for him, excited as she had found a huge handful of violets to weave into his hair. They were a few different colors, some deep purples, but others a softer lavender, and a few white ones. It was peaceful, before they got to the start of the Cyrios Mountain range, but the landscape was starting to turn more forested. Molly was grateful for the flowers that had slowly made their way through everyone’s hair. It was a bright spot of color before they found their way into the foreign land with the tall gray green trunks blocking out the sun. The forest blocking the light didn’t make Molly any more enthusiastic about running into this craziness.

But he was here for his new family.

Jester had pulled off to the side of their path, asking the Traveler questions about how best to get through the mountains and how they might take down this creature. It was cold for camping still, despite some of the spring flowers blooming, but they still passed around the bug spray. It would not be a fun time to get bitten by a tick and waste their healing spells. Eventually they all pulled their things together, getting back onto the horses as a light drizzle began to filter down through the trees. The horses didn’t seem to want to go into the woods either, which just set Molly more on edge.

He watched as Caleb’s eyes glazed over with arcane light and Frumpkin started darting up into the branches, scouting ahead. Remembering the last time he had been able to tell Caleb everything he wanted, Molly almost wished they were alone.

But all he could do was keep an eye on the wizard and make sure he didn’t fall off his horse or lead himself into a tree. Earlier Caleb had taken a note back from the bartender, one that had Molly’s name on it written in Infernal in Caleb’s handwriting. He’d told the man he might need it later. Molly had hung back, wanting to ask the dwarven man what Caleb had told him when the note was delivered, but Caleb didn’t leave the bar without him.

Molly wanted to read that note. It was clearly for him. Normally he wouldn’t consider invading Caleb’s privacy like that, but he was very suspicious about what was in it after seeing the Volstrucker the previous night.

After what Beau had explained to the group about the trained assassins after Caleb, Molly was worried it was Caleb’s way of getting out of saying goodbye.

Beau was taking the lead through the forest, looking at the path ahead and making sure they didn’t get lost. Jester was cheering because her pack of fruit gummies had all red ones, offering everyone else packs of their own. Only Molly and Nott took her up on it. Molly’s package was all yellow ones, but he wasn’t going to complain when he felt like speaking too loud would sic a bear on them or something. Caduceus was speaking to all their horses, keeping them calm and on the path. But it wasn’t long before they realized they weren’t alone, the horses braying and nearly getting spooked into bolting away.

A birdlike creature, dripping with what might have been oil, hunched over them in the branches above. It was large, making Molly’s skin crawl. "You lost, flesh? I ask your purpose.” It snarled down at them, “Despair makes flesh tasty."

Jester shrugged, trying not to look disgusted. “Well, it's good that we're so happy then!”

“We are very content, yes,” Nott said, stepping backwards a few feet with her horse.

The creature hissed at the goblin, "Where you go?"

Fjord stepped forward then, trying to smooth things over. “We have a meeting with the witch Isharnai. Do you know her?”

The creatures all snarled, shifting on their branches. "We know of her. Mean witch."

Molly’s hand was hovering over the hilt of his sword, ready to draw it at any sign of struggle when Caleb moved his horse forward.

Caduceus was asking, “Why is she mean?” while the creatures spoke in riddles, and Molly was watching Caleb like a hawk.

He was digging in his saddle bag, pulling out a jar of something strange. It looked like something Yussa might have given him. Meanwhile Nott was turning invisible on her horse, carefully backing away. Things didn’t look great, but if Caleb was going to try and negotiate Molly wasn’t going to stop him. If they could end this without a fight, all the better.

Caleb asked, “You wouldn't mind if we had a grievance with her? Perhaps there is something we could trade to come through.”

The creature cocked its head, moving a bit closer. Molly could smell the stench of the harpy as it moved closer, black matted feathers coated in strange slick oil. It would probably get all over his sword, but that seemed rather inevitable now. Still, he held, waiting for Caleb's words to sink in. He was a convincing guy after all. “Trade maybe. What you have to trade?” Its shrill voice calmed a little bit and Molly took a deep breath. Maybe this wouldn’t come to blows.

Caleb presented them with some strange boba, telling them it would keep them well fed without the need for carnage or scavenging. More of the harpies moved closer and Molly tensed again.

“Oh, ah, that’s like nine days worth-” Caleb said, watching the harpy guzzling down the boba and starting to cough and splutter.

The closest one screeched through her coughing and the rest converged on them all. Molly swore under his breath and pulled out his scimitar, moving off his horse to try and get the closest harpy away from Caleb. He ignited it with radiant energy, trying desperately to blind the creature and failing.

Beau sent one of their horses running wild into the fray, and Yasha jumped from her horse to take a swipe at the same harpy as soon as it came in range. A flash of green energy emanated from Jester and the whole pathway was filled with weird glowing pink unicorns flying through the air. As cool as that was, Molly had to focus. He’d ask how the hell she did it later.

The largest harpy screeched, some strange effect that sent a shiver down Molly’s spine, but he shook it off and took a swipe at the thing as it missed Yasha by a hair. Around him he could hear the other harpies descending on his friends, taking hits at Fjord and Beau. Another flash of energy, teal this time, burst through the area and the unicorns were joined by strange little beetles going to nibble at the flesh of the harpies. Molly really wanted to know what that was. Must be some cleric thing; they looked like something Caduceus would come up with.

Caleb finally got out of the way, almost stumbling but backing up frantically, straight into Jester. Molly could hear him say something, but he was thoroughly distracted by the harpy bursting into flames in front of him, the wave of heat rolling over him as he felt Caleb’s magic permeate the air.

Molly saw him crouch out of the way out of the corner of his eye and got to work slashing at the harpy halfways burnt to a crisp in front of him.

But he could see a larger harpy swerving by them and ducking down to take two swipes at Caleb. He heard Caduceus scream out some protective arcane words to lessen the blow, but could still smell blood in the air. His stomach dropped and he whipped around to try and reach Caleb.

Yasha and Beau carved up two of them, throwing the corpses aside, but there were still three more, and the big one was still trying to slash at Caleb under the horses. One was taken apart by Caduceus’s beetles and Jester’s unicorns. Two others somehow shattered into ice shards around Fjord as Molly moved to try and cover Caleb. The matronly harpy snarled at him but before she could get a blow in two crossbow bolts whistled through the air and into her thick oiled flesh, making her stumble and fall.

“Well… That was fun,” Jester said, a little halfheartedly. “Is everyone okay?”

Caleb got out from his hiding spot, rubbing the torn patch of coat on his arm. “Ja. Just a scratch, thanks to Caduceus.” The rain was washing the blood away as Jester mended his coat.

Biting his lip, Molly wasn’t sure if he should offer a bandage or something. He didn’t like how his heart pounded even with those smaller monsters. They weren’t very strong, and Fjord, who’d gotten the worst of it, wasn’t hurt that badly. The enchantment on his armor was really impressive.

But still. The thought that Caleb was going to come here on his own was in the back of Molly’s head, worrying him sick. The man had no sense of self preservation when it came to his friends. At least Caleb knew he was of more use in the back of the group, or at least with some semblance of cover.

They gathered themselves together and got back to traveling. Caleb went back into Frumpkin’s body on his horse, and Molly fell in line. Any quiet optimism from the morning had dissipated, leaving them to travel in silence and hope to avoid attracting any attention.

As Caleb was watching Frumpkin leap through the trees overhead, Molly heard a popping sound. Looking down, Molly saw there was an opening of some kind of hot spring right next to the group. A loud hiss sounded and sprayed a massive geyser of scalding hot liquid all over the entirety of the party. Swearing, Molly tugged Caleb out of the way of the worst of it.

He hissed as the acidic substance ate through part of the flesh on his arm, looking over the rest of the group to make sure everyone was okay. They were a little worse for wear, but not ready to collapse. His arm was fine, thankfully it was the one without tattoos. Maybe it would have worn away some of the eyes, but that was an expensive risk to take. He'd spent a fortune on the tattoos, and it would probably cost just as much to get them redone.

“Fuck,” he mumbled, scratching his head and turning to Caleb to assess the damage. “You okay?”

“Ja, but your arm,” Caleb mumbled, looking like he wanted to help but having no idea how. “I… do you want a healing potion?”

Molly sighed. It stung, but they would be better off saving those. He stopped Caleb from fumbling in his coat pockets. “It’s fine for now. Maybe if we don’t have to fight anything else tonight Jester can heal it up before bed.”

He didn’t look happy about it, but they joined the rest of the group, talking in a quiet circle.

The others were discussing sending back the horses who were now in danger of dying if they hit another geyser, and Jester was adamant that Caleb teleport them somewhere. He sighed softly, turning them into strange almost cat-like creatures instead. Yasha mumbled the name of them, something like more-bounding, but Molly could barely hear it over Jester’s pleasure. “Now they’re less likely to get attacked. Is that sufficient?” Caleb asked.

Jester was sated as Caduceus told the horse turned beasts to go back to the town, or to be free in the plains or something. Molly was mostly worried about how the group were going to get through the next day without getting too hurt, not about some random horses. Even with Caduceus and Jester, he didn’t want to worry about one of their friends not coming back.

Molly knew she and Caduceus could even bring people back from the dead, but he couldn’t help but worry what state they would be in if it happened. He’d died once, and the thought of it happening again, losing all sense of himself, or worse, turning back into whatever he’d been before… It was too much.

The thought of Caleb forgetting him was somehow even worse.

As they traveled through the forest a wave of exhaustion took them from the rough terrain, especially as they tried to avoid more acid spray and harpies.

“I don’t want to use magic to heal everyone if we’re going to see the hag right away. Do we want to make camp for the night instead?” Jester asked, looking at the forest looming around them.

Beau nodded, “We did get all that camping stuff.”

“I’ll scout ahead for a place.” Yasha said, looking around with Beau trailing after her. Jester said since they were bedding down for the night she and Caduceus would come around and make sure no one had lasting damage from the burns.

“Fuck, it’s getting dark,” Beau grumbled, getting out her phone flashlight and trying to see a decent pathway.

Caduceus stood up. “Oh, I’ll go with you so you can save your phone battery. I can do this,” he said and the end of his staff lit up the area around them.

“Whoa, that’s so cool, Caduceus!” Jester grinned, looking at the now glowing staff.

Nott blinked, “Eh, Caleb can do that too.”

“It’s two completely different spells, Schatz,” Caleb mumbled, but he ruffled her hair and struck up a quiet conversation. Molly couldn’t hear everything, but got the gist. Caleb was just making sure she was okay with everything so far. It wasn’t a great thing to confront your past like that. Molly couldn’t stand to think about doing so himself. Finding whoever put him in the ground sounded like his worst nightmare. He'd deal with his weird almost tattoos and memories of grave dirt forever before thinking about doing something like this.

The scouting party circled back, saying they’d found a place not far off that wasn’t too swampy to set up. Yasha and Jester had stayed to arrange some logs to sit on and collect firewood.

Slowly they made a camp, Caleb offering to provide a campfire and saying he could make a dome to protect them while they slept. Frumpkin was purring around his neck like a scarf as he arranged the firewood the others had brought back into a small stack. Yasha set up the solar panel to charge all of their phones with Fjord and Nott, and Beau started handing out things for tents. The solar panel had been collecting sunlight through the trees on the aasimar’s back all day, so they were all able to get their phones back in a working condition, despite there being no reception.

Jester had managed to get a little radio to pick up some frequency nearby, but the songs were all in what Molly recognized as Zemnian, sounding more like an opera than anything they could dance to. It was more soothing than Molly expected, but he was pretty sure there was a certain wizard to blame for his affinity for the language. At one point something like a weather forecast started and Yasha paused in her work to ask Caleb to translate.

They would have clear skies ahead, no storms for a while. Bittersweet for Yasha, but good luck for traveling. And for Yasha not getting called away by the Stormlord. Molly definitely didn’t want that, not now.

Beau and Yasha paired off in one tent, Fjord and Caduceus in another, Jester demanding a fun sleepover with Nott, which left Caleb and Molly to the last one. Caleb was concerned with tending to the fire, leaving Molly to fumble over the tent himself. Yasha, always the savior, left setting up the solar panel to Nott and Fjord again to help Molly out.

“Thanks, Yash,” he said, sneaking a side hug for his oldest friend before moving back to the infuriating tent.

She nodded, using her foot to push a stake into the ground. “You get away okay from those harpies?”

“Yeah, just exhausted. Bad vibes around here.” Molly started kicking his own stake down, grumbling that there must be a rock in the way. He had to take it out and start all over again while Yasha was already sinking in the other two.

She clapped a hand on his shoulder, nodding again. “We’ll be okay. There’s a lot of us.”

Molly sighed softly, leaning into it. “Didn’t stop anyone from getting hurt.”

“But we’re okay. Do you need Jester or Caduceus?” she asked, looking at the chemical burn puckering the skin of his arm.

“They’ll get around to me eventually.” He shrugged, not wanting to bother them as they set up their tents. Especially since Jester was on her way over to Caleb.

Yasha didn’t argue, but he saw her whispering to Caduceus a few minutes later. The firbolg sat down by Caleb in the center of the camp, meditating for a moment until Molly felt the wash of healing energy fill him. His arm looked almost completely healed, back to its full lavender glory, and from the looks of it, the others had benefited as well.

He grinned, finishing setting up the sleeping bags and going to sit by Caduceus. “You’re an angel, Cad.”

“Just doing my part,” Caduceus said, but Molly could hear the pleased tone in the rumbling voice. The whole atmosphere of the camp lightening just a bit now that no one was dealing with burns or cuts, and Caduceus had plenty to be proud of. It seemed like this was his first tough journey like this, and under the calm Molly could feel the hidden layer of stress. It was present in everyone, but they all had their own ways of dealing with it.

Jester was finishing up healing Caleb, now leaning on his shoulder with a grin. Frumpkin had moved into her lap, still purring. “This is pretty fun, you guys! You know, I’ve never been camping before.”

“Like ever?” Beau asked, raising a brow.

“Nope! Mama’s a little better about leaving the house since she started therapy, but she doesn’t like to leave Nicodranas," Jester said, petting Frumpkin in her lap and enjoying the campfire.

Beau blinked. “Weird. Everyone else been camping?”

Molly nodded, having traveled on the road with Yasha and Gustav on his way down to the Menagerie Coast. Fjord was mumbling about something that sounded like some nightmare boy scouts type experience.

Nott was climbing up on the log Caleb and Jester were sitting on. “I’m not sure you can call what Caleb and I did camping.”

Caleb frowned, “Why not?”

She snorted, “Because we had no tents and no sleeping bags and we were in cities and we had no house to go back to? Do you need more reasons?”

The wizard rolled his eyes. “I guess not. But I went camping as a child.”

“Oh. Well I didn’t. Why sleep outside when you have a perfectly good house?” Nott scrunched up her nose.

Caduceus explained how he had done something akin to a vision quest or meditation solo retreat in the woods, Yasha saying she had done both. It’d been a long while since she’d left town chasing storms, and Molly was grateful for that. He needed her around.

They picked at their rations, complaining a bit about how much they wished they could get takeout instead. Jester was asking Caleb to invent a teleportation spell that would magically bring them food, trying to eat her jerky without hurting her teeth. Eventually she gave up and started passing out pastries she had grabbed from the bakery café before they’d left Nicodranas. Molly found himself between Yasha and Caduceus, leaning into his roommate and enjoying the family eating together.

It was almost nice enough to forget what they would be doing tomorrow to get rid of Nott’s curse.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> can't believe I've posted 40 chapters of this already! craziness!!


	41. Memories and Cupcakes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> this is a really long chapter because it is FULL of stuff!! bad dreams! evil hags! emotional turmoil! polymorphing! this swamp has everything!!

### Chapter 41: Memories and Cupcakes

Caleb offered to take the first watch, pleased when Molly said he’d join him. Everyone got ready for bed, but Caleb could feel the tension in the air as all of them brushed their teeth and took off their shoes while keeping their armor on. It was strange to see them decked out in the weird old protective pieces, like he was back at the Renaissance Faire with Mollymauk. This wasn’t half as fun. Fjord and Caduceus offered to take the next watch, disappearing to get some shut-eye beforehand. Everyone wandered off into their tents and Caleb and Molly were left alone. 

Molly had started stealing small kisses on Caleb’s cheeks whenever they were alone, and that was the first thing he did when Jester finally collapsed into her tent with Nott. He’d moved closer, sitting beside Caleb on the fallen log, but not crowding him and not keeping him from getting out his spellbook.

With a soft blush and taking his time, Caleb carefully cast the Tiny Hut spell from his spellbook. As the arcane dome of force appeared around them, protecting all of their tents, Caleb sat down back at the fire, this time a bit closer to Mollymauk. He sent Frumpkin up to purr in the tiefling’s lap. “How is your arm?”

“All healed. Caddy got it all set for me,” Molly said, twisting it in the firelight so Caleb could see the unmarred skin.

He nodded, trying to blink away his exhaustion. “Gut, gut.”

“So, if we have this cool dome, do we actually have to keep watch?” Molly asked, looking at the magic field surrounding them.

Caleb shrugged, “It is not infallible. If someone came by with the ability to dispel magical effects, it would be useless. I would not put that past this hag. Also, things could tunnel from underneath. It has no bottom.”

The tiefling nodded, moving so he was leaning on Caleb’s shoulder. His warmth was more than welcome and Caleb hummed as he snaked an arm around Molly’s waist and moved Frumpkin to make biscuits in their laps.

Their watch passed in silence, only broken once or twice by Caleb asking Molly to translate something into infernal for him (campfire, tent, solar panel), and the few soft sounds Caleb couldn’t smother when Molly kissed at his throat. It was still gentle, still at his pace, but he was sure his face was red. Molly offered to wake Beau and Yasha for the next shift, so Caleb was able to just collapse into their tent, cheeks still pink. There was something a bit different about sneaking kisses near their friends. It was almost exciting, though it was a little worrisome. Caleb could push down those insecurities and enjoy the moment, for now. Frumpkin purred softly against Caleb’s back as he curled an arm around Molly and drifted off.

In the middle of the night, 2:37 am, Molly shot upright in the sleeping bag, taking part of it with him and effectively waking Caleb out of a sound sleep. He was shivering, tears brimming in the corners of his eyes, shining in the dim light of the little lantern.

Blinking the sleep away from his own eyes, Caleb sat up and gently rubbed his back, “Hey, you’re okay. You’re safe. Do you want me to open the tent for some fresh air?”

This was different than usual, and Caleb wasn’t sure why. Normally there was some coughing, and Caleb could grab a lemon candy, open a window, and they could all get back to sleep. Now Mollymauk was shaking like a leaf.

At his words Molly whipped to look at him, half terrified. “Do you… Do you remember me?”

That was very new. Caleb blinked. His hand froze on Molly’s back, really unsure what all that meant. He didn’t want to make it worse, even if Molly usually liked the contact. “Ja, Mollymauk. I remember you. How can I help?”

“Thank fuck,” Molly mumbled, falling backwards and letting out a shaking sigh.

“Molly, how can I help?” Caleb murmured again, falling back beside Molly and wondering if he should bother with the tin of lemon candies. This looked like a different kind of fear than the normal anxieties. 

The tiefling turned, bunching up his pillow under his horn and staring at him a moment before pulling him into a near crushing hug. “Just… don’t forget me,” he mumbled into Caleb’s hair, tangling their limbs together.

“Mollymauk, you’re the most unforgettable person I’ve ever met,” Caleb said, trying to be reassuring. It was clear he wanted to be touched then, so Caleb moved so he could wrap his arms around Molly. This had to be related to the tiefling’s memories, but Caleb was sure he’d never heard about Molly worrying about that from other people.

Of course other people didn’t almost die around him on a regular basis. Caleb was used to the brutality of the world, of the Dwendalian Empire in particular. The good memories he’d enjoyed here were completely overpowered by the bad. Molly, despite being good with a sword, hadn’t been doing much fighting in the last four years, even if he had traveled through the Empire. Those memories were intertwined with his first awful memory of the world, and he’d quickly escaped them and this country.

He just nodded, still clinging to Caleb. 

Caleb shifted, rubbing Molly’s back and mumbling in his ear. He started out in Common, just saying they were both going to be fine, that he could never forget him, but soon devolved into Zemnian, unable to think of complex thoughts in any other language.

“Dir geht es gut, meine Liebe.” _You’re fine, my love._

“Ich habe dich.” _I have you._

“Uns wird nichts passieren.” _Nothing will happen to us._

“Du bist sicher.” _You’re safe._

“Wir sind sicher.” _We’re safe._

“Ich werde nicht zulassen, dass dir etwas passiert.” _I won’t let anything happen to you._

Slowly, Molly’s breathing calmed and Caleb moved to run his fingers through his purple hair. “Besser?” he mumbled, not bothering to translate the cognate.

He could feel the nod more than see it.

“Do you want to talk about it?”

Caleb felt the sharp intake of breath, threatening tears. “I… Just don’t go down again on us, okay?”

“Again?” Caleb mumbled, frowning. He hadn’t really had a close call recently. At least not in front of Molly. His training with Yussa sometimes got strenuous, but they could always handle what they got themselves into. Then he remembered the graveyard. The way he’d reacted had been more from exhaustion and exertion than anything else, but he had blacked out for a moment there. “Oh. Ja. I… I always try not to. Have to make sure you all aren’t getting yourselves into too much trouble.” He tried to sound teasing, but mostly just sounded tired.

Molly took a deep breath. “Seriously. I know Cad and Jess can heal people, but death is… complicated. I don’t want to lose you, even if it’s just for a second.”

Taking a breath, Caleb opted for rationality rather than soothing, hoping it could fulfill both in this moment. “You know where I keep my healing potions, ja?” He’d gotten a few more, though he’d given one to Nott and had secretly downed one yesterday after the harpy had gotten in a lucky blow. Caleb had also snuck one into Molly’s pack, but he wasn’t sure when the tiefling would notice it. He’d also made sure that Jester and Caduceus each had diamonds. Caleb wasn’t going to lose anyone this trip, not like that.

“That’s not the point, I just want to make sure you don’t go down at all.” Molly’s voice sounded raw, halfways to a croak, and it grated on the edges of Caleb’s heart.

Caleb shifted in the sleeping bag, starting to wind his fingers through Molly’s hair. “That’s hard for me sometimes. I’m not physically very strong. I brought the spell for an arcane shield this time. I used it yesterday and everything. But you know where my healing potions are. Top right side of my coat, near the journal.”

There was a long pause before Molly repeated him, “Top right, near the journal.”

“Gut. We’ll be okay. We’ve got everyone looking out for each other.”

A shudder ran through the tiefling and Caleb held him closer. “Caleb.”

“Ja?”

“I’ve… died before. You know that.” His voice was small, a hint of a tremor in it.

Caleb only nodded. Molly went on. “What if I don’t come back me? What if… what if I forget everything again? Or I remember? What if I’m a different person?”

“We’ll find a way to fix it,” Caleb mumbled, finally understanding the fear. It didn’t help that the fear sounded reasonable. That it latched onto the wizard’s heart and wouldn’t let go.

Molly sighed shakily. “Yeah?”

“I promise,” Caleb insisted, moving in the sleeping bag until he could rest his forehead against Molly’s. “If we lose you, I’ll never stop until we have you again. Okay?”

Molly looked like he wanted to say more, but just nodded, staring into Caleb’s eyes in the dark. 

The morning came all too soon, leaving the gang stiff and grumpy as they set out to travel further into the forest. It slowly turned more and more into a swamp as they trekked through, though they were much more careful in traversing, avoiding any lurking monsters before they made it to the broken down hut Jester had seen in her scrying ritual. Their boots were muddied, their socks were damp, and the hut looked like a thing straight out of a nightmare. Well, not Caleb’s nightmares, but someone else's. Probably Nott’s.

Caleb noted there seemed to be no windows, and only one door. This would not be easy. Nott, Beau, and Yasha peered inside the open door, finding no one home and reporting that the interior was filled with cages.

Fjord cast a spell then couldn’t tear his eyes away from the top of the house. Caleb’s hand hovered in his coat, bat guano and sulfur resting in his hand just in case.

"It is rare to have so many visitors, let alone all at once, at my home. You come here, survive the trial of the trek, and I assume it's because you're driven by the need for strong answers, yes? What is it that drives you then? Come, come, we can talk, one at a time." The voice was deep and resonant, shaking Caleb to his core. He didn’t move, looking to the rest of his friends.

Fjord was the first to walk in, the door slamming behind him.

They waited, weapons and spell components at the ready, the silence deafening. A swirl of anxiety had filled Caleb’s stomach, threatening nausea, but this was what he was good at. Negotiation. Following through with peace or violence. He’d been trained in this, though the training had gone awry.

Fjord walked out a few minutes later, the look on his face less than reassuring, “She's a deal-maker. She's attracted by misery. Not existing, but perhaps new. It seems we'll have to give something in order to have your curse lifted.”

Beau heard that and immediately walked in, ignoring Jester saying, “Oh, come on! Caleb, as soon as she comes out, Fire Bolt the hut!”

The door slammed shut again, and Molly started pacing, hand on the hilt of his sword. Caleb just stayed still, hands in his pockets. He could be patient.

Existing misery wouldn’t cut it. That practically ruled Caleb out right at the get go. He didn’t want to think about the miseries his friends were offering inside the hut to help solve this problem he’d helped create.

If he’d been stronger, he might have been able to do this on his own.

Beau walked out looking like she’d seen a ghost. Actually, worse. Caleb had seen her after she’d seen a ghost. She looked like she was walking to her death.

“What'd you say, what'd you do? What happened?” Nott was walking right up to her, starting to get frantic.

Jester was right alongside her, “What just happened?”

“Go talk to her,” was all Beau would say. She gave one word answers until Nott took a deep breath, a sip from her flask, and walked inside. All the waiting was eating at them, but Caleb didn’t know if there was anything to be done about it.

“Not much happened in there. I kind of want to kill her, but I feel like that's going to be super hard.” Nott looked like she was hiding something, but Caleb couldn’t tell what.

They couldn’t convince her to say what she might offer the hag, Beau eventually revealing she’d offered to walk away from the family they’d built.

Yasha fell silent at that, walking inside the hut. Caleb could see the hurt on her face as she turned away from them all. She wasn’t willing to sacrifice that, and he wasn’t either.

_Selfish._

He swallowed as he heard laughter emanating from the small building, keeping his hand wrapped around the spell components in his pocket. Yasha could handle herself, but he still wanted to be ready.

“She's all yours, whoever wants to go in there,” Yasha said, deadpan as ever, but this time the voice matched her eyes and Caleb’ stomach turned.

Molly stopped pacing and stormed into the hut. Caleb felt the cold claw of fear clench around his heart as he watched him disappear inside. The door slamming shut started him holding his breath, and he didn’t let it out until the tiefling reemerged, looking beyond shaken. “I can… I mean whoever wants to go next, feel free,” he mumbled, not meeting anyone’s eyes.

Moving from his tactical position far from the door, Caleb swallowed his fear and walked inside. All of his normal cowardice slipped away as he had watched this horrible woman hurt those he loved. Hurt Nott, hurt Beau, hurt Yasha, hurt Molly.

It was too much. He was a selfish man, a coward, and a fool, and that was what had gotten them into this mess. He really ought to be the one to fix it.

"Hello there. You're filled with more misery than even the aasimar." The voice resonated through his chest, making his skin crawl.

Caleb steeled himself, putting on the impassive mask he had to wear for most of his childhood. "I'm sure I am. You'd like to make more?"

"Oh it seems you make plenty for yourself. But you have the potential for more. More than the tall woman." She leaned down, tipping up his chin. "I could take your memories again. Leave you in madness to lash out at your friends. Not unlike your purple friend." Caleb's heart lurched in his chest. Molly had offered his memories.

Caleb wasn't sure if he would be left with enough memories of his friends to stay sane. To not hurt them. It wasn't an option.

But she went on, "Or you could do like the other human and leave. That would be even better. Abandon your friends and rejoin those who made you this way."

Caleb felt himself twitch under his steely mask. It might be inevitable. Ikithon’s people were probably already searching for him. He could save Nott at the same time as he disappeared. He could do two selfless acts at once.

Two birds, one stone.

One horrible, horrible stone.

One pulsing, green, glass like stone, dripping with blood.

He said nothing, stepping backwards out of the hut and watching her the whole way. Someone else could try and unravel this particular knot. Caleb was a selfish man. He knew that.

He was going to be selfish and take every minute with his friends that he could. Perhaps if the battle looked to be going south he could offer again. His misery would probably be tempting. Long lasting at least.

Molly was watching him leave, a deep look of fear in his eyes.

Caleb couldn’t worry about it too much, going to hold his hand as he watched Jester disappear inside. Watching her slip inside was almost as bad as Molly. Even though Caleb knew her strange god protected her, even though he knew she wouldn’t go down quietly, that she could heal herself, or even Caduceus if things got bad.

It didn’t stop him from worrying. Caleb wondered if the witch could taste his misery from here. The only thing keeping him from spiraling was the fact that his friends needed him, the fact that his friends didn’t have time to deal with him having a breakdown. He could push down the itching in his arms, the whirling memories of scalpels and crystals. He could ignore it and focus on waiting for Jester. His hands closed around the sulfur and bat guano in his pocket, ready.

They waited.

And they waited.

And waited.

And waited.

Beau walked up to the door, about to burst in when Nott held her back. “Let her do her thing!”

Then they heard Jester laughing from inside the hut. A few exchanged glances and they all moved closer, weapons drawn.

Jester rushed out, eyes wide and making a strange sound towards Nott. “We got to go. You're good. Let's go.”

“What?” Nott looked around, confused.

“Let's go! Come on, let's go. Let's go.” She put a hand on Nott's back, pushing her along into the woods.

Fjord was bewildered, as were they all, asking, “What do you mean?”

“Let's get the fuck out of here,” Jester hissed, moving away.

Caleb joined the group as they started following Jester’s hasty retreat. Nott insisted, “I need to get the-”

“No, you don't. Your curse is broken. A deal has been made. Everything's fine.” Jester was speed walking away from the hut, expecting everyone to follow her. Caleb was worried, but he trusted Jester. The others weren’t so easy to convince.

Nott asked, “What did you give her?”

Fjord wasn’t dropping it either, grabbing her arm and continuing to question her, “What do you mean it's been broken?”

“I gave her something very precious. Let's get the fuck out of here.” Jester was looking over her shoulder like the hag might come after them at any moment. Caleb could tell she had done something, but couldn’t for the life of him tell what. She clearly hadn’t done anything that the hag would take too kindly to, considering her demeanor.

Nott said, “Your hands are still there. I thought you were going to offer your hands.”

“I know. You know what? She ended up being a really nice lady.” Jester grinned and Caleb realized the further away they got, the wider her grin grew. She’d probably done something amazing. It was a shame when the group underestimated her.

“Jester, Jester, are you sure?” Fjord was still holding her arm, looking in her eyes.

She nodded quickly, leaning into the touch now. “Everything's fine.”

“Then let's go. Let's walk.” Fjord finally relented, moving along with the rest of them and not trying to slow down. Caleb noticed she left her arm linked with Fjord's. That was very sweet. He was happy for her, through his worry. 

“I am so serious. Let's go.” Jester was halfway to skipping.

Caduceus blinked, “Oh, go, okay.”

Caleb shrugged, still holding Molly’s hand. “All right, well, we're leaving.”

Jester nodded, looking over at him, “The curse is lifted, and we can try that spell again, let's go. Let's go, let's keep going, let's go.” Her grin was only growing.

They kept after her, asking what on Earth she’d done. Jester finally said, “I maybe, I'd rather not say this right now. Like, you know, I gave away something really special and shit's fine, it's fine. We should just go because I don't want to, like-”

“But we’re good?” Beau asked. She still looked shaken. Caleb would need to talk to her about thinking that she’d “peaked” with this group of friends. Later, when they got a moment alone.

Jester nodded, “Nott’s curse is broken, everyone is fine, everyone is safe. We just need to get out of here! I'll tell you when we get the hut up, okay? I'll talk to everyone in the hut, Beau.”

So they walked as far as they could, waiting until nightfall for Caleb to cast the hut again. Tomorrow he would be able to teleport them back to Nicodranas if they so chose, and they could figure out what the hell just happened.

But as he was trying to cast the spell for the dome, Yasha and Jester cleared away a huge tree trunk from their camping spot with a loud splash down into the swamp. Caduceus cleared his throat, alerting Caleb to the danger part way through his ritual of casting the dome.

“Guys, we’ve got company,” Caduceus called out, pointing to shapes in the mist.

Humanoid creatures began to emerge, though largely their flesh was bloated and sloughing off their body in places, swollen and green. Horrible toxic zombie-type figures and that looked like they might move with slow exaggerated movements, until one rushed at them with preternatural speed.

Caleb felt the magic swirling around him for the hut, still a few minutes away, fizzle out and sputter.

"Caleb, can you teleport us out of here?" Nott asked, though he couldn't tell where she was hiding.

His heart sank. He knew he should have prepared for an escape route instead of a fight. "I cannot until tomorrow. If we can fight them off until I can set up the dome again we will be safe."

Yasha started carving into them without a second thought, Caleb fumbling in his pockets for his spell components. She was sprayed with some acidic liquid as her sword carved through the torso, sizzling away at her skin. Caleb gulped, wondering if Mollymauk had anything but melee attacks. He doubted it.

More came rushing in to swipe at Yasha and Jester, their fingers bladed unlike any undead creature Caleb had ever seen. Caduceus knocked some back with his shield, sending them flying.

One had lashed out at Caleb before he had a chance to blink, taking the bladed fingers clawing at his neck and chest. He could see the bolt in the creature's chest before he even stumbled back, Nott protecting him from somewhere in the shadows. But the piercing bolt sent more of the poison flying out, getting him and a few others soaked and coughing.

Somewhere he could hear Molly cursing.

He let loose a fireball, managing to weaken a few of them but not doing as much damage as he’d hoped. This wasn’t looking good. Caleb needed to change his plan, grabbing a cocoon from a different pocket.

Watching the carnage, Caleb said the arcane words and felt his magic surge around him, becoming a huge, orange ape.


	42. Fuck, Fuck, Fuck, Part 2: Electric Beargaloo

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> remember how after the cupcake scene it was all calm and tranquil and there was no combat in the dark dangerous swamp at night? yeah me neither

### Chapter 42: Fuck, Fuck, Fuck, Part 2: Electric Beargaloo

The undead were swarming, and even with his radiant damage, Molly was struggling. The poison was seeping through his coat, searing his skin with more chemical burns. There was no way it wasn’t going to scar, unless they all healed right away.

There was a flash of arcane energy, and Molly heard a new terrifying sound. Then he saw that the giant ape that appeared in the swamp was a very familiar orange. A deep russet color he’d slowly fallen in love with over the past months.

Caleb.

He was thrashing in the swamp, tossing the creatures away from them left and right. Molly sighed a breath of relief that at least the wizard’s own body wouldn’t be hurt by the strange creatures. He didn’t have to worry about Caleb forgetting, not tonight. Molly could worry about himself. He was still shaken from the hag's offer to take the past four years of his memory away. Whatever Caleb had offered, he definitely couldn’t focus on now.

Couldn’t think about how Beau said she might leave, and how Caleb might have done the same.

Couldn’t think about the note that was still in Caleb’s pocket.

Soon the rest of the undead were dealt with and they all looked around, weapons still drawn. The ape-Caleb that Nott deemed “Capeleb” moved beside him, sitting down with a sigh. Molly leaned against him, not entirely for comfort, partially from pure exhaustion. Also he was soft.

Jester let out her breath in a huff, “Who needs healing? Someone should get Caleb to make the dome.”

Fjord moved over, starting to speak slowly to the ape, when Caleb shrank back down to size. Molly moved an arm around Caleb as he began to speak with a soft, teasing tone, “You know I can understand you, ja?”

The half orc flushed slightly, “Well, no, I don’t have that spell-”

“Don’t you remember when you were a duck?” Molly grinned, and Fjord turned a much darker green.

Caleb only chuckled as he clapped Fjord on the shoulder, setting up the materials for the dome. Molly watched him, keeping an eye on their backs for more of the undead. Yasha moved to his back to do the same and watch his six, asking softly, “Are you okay?”

“I could use some healing, but I think Cad’s doing his thing again,” Molly mumbled, leaning back into Yasha just a bit. Exhaustion was creeping in, but he still needed to be alert until the dome went up.

He was indeed, and Caleb got the dome ready and a nice fire brewing while some of the undead heard them whispering and spent time throwing themselves on the dome.

Nott was making faces at them, taking unflattering pictures of them on her phone. “Gods, these things are hideous. No one tell Yeza about this.”

Halfheartedly Molly nodded, but didn’t snap a picture. He didn’t need anything to help him remember the awful things they’d seen today. Jester would send him one if he ever needed to prove a point, and she was taking enough selfies with them for the both of them. She opted to go without the radio for tonight, a little creeped out by the undead that were pounding on the dome. After a while they gave up, looking for other prey out in the swamp.

“Okay, now that we’re away from prying ears, hopefully, Jester, what the hell happened back there?” Fjord asked

She grinned, “I gave her a cupcake.”

“A cupcake,” Fjord repeated, staring at her incredulously.

Jester nodded. “A cupcake. Sprinkled with something that made it delicious but also makes you kind of susceptible to a certain sort of magic. I bought it for the bakery, because it really does make things delicious, but it's kind of creepy, you know? I thought I could take the magic part out, but it was too much work. So I just kept it. And I sort of, changed her memory. Made her think we were like best friends and she just wanted to lift the curse because I’m so awesome!”

Molly watched as her eyes flickered with worry to Caleb, but he didn’t seem to be too concerned. It hadn’t occurred to him while Jester spoke, but he remembered the story about Ikithon changing his memory. His stomach turned uncomfortably, and it wasn’t just because he’d had nothing but trail mix and fruit gummies for lunch.

All Molly could hear was Nott, still worried but singing her praises of Jester, right alongside Fjord. They were both impressed, but Molly knew she’d been capable of terrifying things. This was just proof.

Molly sat between Caduceus and Caleb, offering to help Caduceus prepare their dinner. Carefully balancing the cutting board the firbolg had stashed in his pack he cut up vegetables that were going to be some kind of stew. Whatever Caduceus made was usually delicious, so he wasn’t complaining. Especially when Fjord got out a whole squash for them to roast in tinfoil on the fire. Jester and Nott joined them around the fire, not helping like Yasha and Beau, but enjoying the warmth.

Nott was finally calming down, and Molly could see Caleb reacting well to that.

All their burns had been healed by Caduceus, saving Molly’s tattoos, but he still ached all over. Once he was done cutting vegetables he slowly slipped off the log around the fire, leaning his back against it and letting the fire warm his feet. Resting his head on Caleb’s legs but being careful of his horns, his eyes grew heavy.

“I think perhaps we could skip putting up the tents for tonight. The dome should keep us plenty warm. And maybe we could just do one person watches tonight. I think many of us are exhausted,” Caleb said, a soft hand carding through Molly’s hair for a moment. He wanted to protest, but he wasn’t sure he could do much of anything without passing out on the spot.

Jester nodded her approval, “I’ll take the first watch! I wasn’t that close to any of the explode-y poison things. It’ll give me some time to talk about the hag with the Traveler too!”

“I’ll do next,” Beau offered, seeming to have dodged many of the attacks despite being in the fray. Jester had also spent time healing both her and Yasha.

“I can take one,” Caduceus said, having stayed back for most of the battle, throwing spells like Caleb and Fjord.

Caleb nodded, “You can wake me up for the last one.”

Molly sighed softly, but that all sounded okay. There was no reason to worry with someone watching over them. Especially since those who had offered were the most observant to begin with. He wouldn’t have been much help in his state to begin with. Maybe when Caleb took his shift he could wake up and cuddle with him, but he might just sleep through it.

They enjoyed their food, praising Caduceus on the fine meal as Jester declared she had something special and went digging in her pack. Triumphantly she pulled out a bag of marshmallows and some sticks that were way too long to fit in the pink backpack.

In retrospect, it made perfect sense for her to have a bottomless bag filled with sweets. She even had vegan marshmallows saved especially for Caduceus, who grinned at being remembered.

She passed them around and Caleb waved his hands so the highest flames shrunk and they could carefully roast them over the coals. Even so, Nott set hers on fire immediately and blew it out. She grinned around the sticky charred thing, thanking Jester.

“Of course!” Jester grinned back, getting hers to the perfect golden brown.

Fjord and Yasha couldn’t get the hang of it, their marshmallows slipping off and burning with the coals while Jester and Beau cackled at them and offered to help them out.

Molly grinned as the two girls talked their way into their crushes’ laps, giving them marshmallow pointers and not commenting on the strong flush on their cheeks. He sat up and leaned over to Caleb, mumbling in his ear, “If I burn my marshmallow will you sit in my lap?”

Caleb rolled his eyes, ignoring the light flush in his own cheeks. “I’m afraid you’ll have to figure that one out on your own, Mr. Mollymauk.”

He snorted at the formality, but noticed Caleb was just eating his marshmallows barely cooked to begin with. Molly could understand him not wanting to taste anything completely charred. Instead he just leaned up against him, roasting his marshmallow slowly until it was a deep golden brown.

“Are there like, campfire games people play?” Jester asked, looking around the group. “Like traditional camping games?”

“My family sang songs sometimes, but I think that would attract more undead,” Caduceus mumbled.

There was a murmur of agreement from the group as Jester pouted. “Well, all of you need to go camping with me again so we can sing songs then. I want the full experience.”

“I think this is already relatively unorthodox,” Caleb said, smiling softly. “Most people go camping in safe places.”

“You could come with Fjord and me down to the Menagerie to look for the shrine to the Wildmother,” Caduceus said. “We’ll likely be camping again down there.”

Jester lit up, “Oh my gosh, you guys, yes! We should all go!” Her excited voice led another zombie to pound outside the dome, groaning softly in the night and kind of making Molly never want to go camping again, even though he'd enjoyed it in the past. 

“You’re more than welcome to come, Jester, but we might be gone for a while,” Fjord said quietly, a light blush coloring his cheeks again. She still hadn’t left his lap.

“I mean I still text mamma or message every day, so it’s not that big of a deal. It would be fun, right guys?” She looked around the rest of the group eagerly.

There was a cautious air of excitement hanging around them. For all the horrifying things that had happened, it was exhilarating to travel with the group. And Molly was beginning to enjoy feeling like he had a true family. Knowing that Beau wanted to drink a beer with him was one thing, but fighting zombies with her back to back was an entirely different kind of bonding.

Even if said zombies were still pounding right outside where they rested. It seemed a fitting chaos for their odd family.

“I think we should. I want to do… something else before I change back.” Nott spoke up, fidgeting a bit on her solitary seat near the fire.

Caleb perked up a little bit then, always in tune with his friend. “We can do that, Schatz. You don’t need to rush yourself.”

She nodded, looking to him with a soft kind of relief at his understanding. Molly’s tail found its way around Caleb’s wrist and squeezed it gently. In response he felt another hand ruffling his hair gently and almost felt his eyes slip shut. He was dead tired.

“Well, you’d all be more than welcome. I can’t promise it will be much safer than this, but we’ll probably be able to sing a song somewhere along the way.” Caduceus was roasting a vegan marshmallow, which seemed to puff up a bit in the heat compared to the others, but was otherwise the same.

Jester was beaming. “I’m sure mamma will understand why Beau and Molly won’t come back for a bit. Do you think Reani will care?”

Yasha shook her head, “She knows I’m not a guarantee, but I always text within a day or so. I need to see if she’s still okay looking after Yarrow. I can give her a heads up when we get back and she might be able to get us close.”

“Oh, I can actually help with that. I have a teleportation circle memorized near there.” Caleb looked to Caduceus, “I was going to tell you and Fjord when we got back, since I don’t know if that interrupts the ‘pilgrimage’ part, if we warp closer.”

Molly blinked. Another journey with Caleb. As exhilarating as this had been, he wasn’t exactly sure he could stand to watch the wizard get hurt, but he definitely couldn’t stay home imagining it. Might as well stick around to do something about it. And tell him to polymorph more often.

Caduceus was nodding, accepting the offer of help. “I don’t think the way we get there really matters, honestly. I just feel like I need to be there now.”

Fjord thumbed over the symbol of the Wildmother on his neck that Jester had given to him for Winter’s Crest and Molly smiled. They were very cute together. Even if he and Caleb were cuter.

“So tomorrow I could teleport us to Southern Xhorhas?” Caleb asked, looking around for confirmation.

Yasha nodded, asking Jester to send a magical message to Reani for her since there was little to no cell reception this far into the swamplands. They went off to their sleeping bags to talk about it and Jester said she’d message Marion for Beau and Molly to get an extended vacation too. It was a good thing Molly had paid his rent before they left.

It wasn’t long before the fresh excitement faded and Jester moved to take the first watch, promising to wake up Beau when the time came.

Molly was having trouble sleeping in the dirt, even in his exhausted state, trying just to lie still and control his breathing. Everything was quiet around them, just a few lingering sounds of creatures moving in the swamp. But Jester was on watch and they were safe. He fell into a light sleep, still waking to toss and turn every once in a while. It would be a long night.


	43. Rest Your Lips, Soliloquist

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> quiet fireside chats, soft ruminations, a good night's sleep... and all was quiet

### Chapter 43: Rest Your Lips, Soliloquist

Every one of the Nein was getting ready for a well needed sleep. Caleb had risked a quick kiss to Molly’s temple while no one was looking, too pleased to see the adorable sleepiness in the tiefling. It was gentle and reminded him of their home back in Nicodranas. Not to mention the beaming smile he received for it was enough to take his breath away.

Molly’s tail wound around his wrist and they curled up near the fire, Caleb keeping it low so Jester wouldn’t have to worry about it getting out of control. Of course he would be able to smell if anything got too wild. 

Caleb wasn’t expecting to have any late night conversations. Especially not Jester moving over and shaking his shoulder gently. “Caleb? Can I say something real quick? Then I’ll let you sleep, promise.”

He hummed, sitting up a bit and letting his eyes adjust to the dim light again. “Go ahead.”

She shifted, kneeling beside his bed roll and biting her lip before she spoke. “I just wanted to apologize for like… using the modify memory spell. I want you to know, I would never use anything to modify a memory on you, or Yasha, or any of our friends, you know? I just didn’t think there was another option without me like cutting off my hands or letting Nott or Beau try to sacrifice something. I know it’s a horrible, horrible spell, and you just saw those awful people in the bar and-” Her voice was small and timid, a slight tremor hidden under the rambling.

He moved a bit in his sleeping bag, sitting up further to look at her. Caleb had definitely felt a bit odd knowing that Jester had used Ikithon’s spell of choice, but he still trusted her. “It’s a tricky thing. It’s all about what you do with it, ja? I think you did a good thing.”

Jester said, “Yeah.” She still sounded on edge, worried about the reassurance Caleb was able to give. He would have to try again.

“You made Nott happier, and it sounds like you made your new friend happier too, ja?” he asked, eliciting a small laugh from her. Caleb smiled as she did, though he wasn’t sure how genuine it looked. He still felt odd about the whole day, or at the very least completely exhausted.

“Yeah, okay. I just wanted to make sure.” She looked a bit more relaxed.

He was pleased to have reassured her at all, but he needed to sleep. Leaning forward for a quick hug to add to the reassurance, he mumbled, “Goodnight, Jester.”

She smiled a little more genuinely as he pulled away. “Goodnight, Caleb.” Jester moved back to the other side of the dome, pulling out her sketchbook and starting to speak with the Traveler about their day.

Her gentle words were almost enough to let Caleb nod off until he heard another voice.

Caduceus hummed softly then, his head near Molly’s and Caleb’s as they rested. “Caleb, you still awake?”

“Ja, Caduceus. Is everything alright?” he murmured, though the exhaustion was starting to overtake him.

Caduceus said, “I just wanted to say you should call Pumat. Talk out some stuff with him about the bar and what happened yesterday. Okay? Doesn’t have to be right away, just soon.”

“Okay, Caduceus,” he said, not really wanting to do that at all. He knew that Pumat did therapy sessions over the phone, and he knew that he really did need one.

But he couldn’t help but to think that his anxiety in this case was completely justified. That he needed to be on edge to look out for the Volstrucker that could be hunting him even as he laid in his sleeping bag.

Of course Pumat would help him rationalize these things.

It wasn’t rational to worry enough not to sleep, especially not with someone keeping watch. He would need his strength if he was going to try and fight them at all. So he slipped off into a deep, restful slumber, waking eventually, hours later when it was time for him to take his watch. Maybe he’d call Pumat tomorrow.

Caduceus was gentle, not jolting him awake, just rousing him slowly.

“Time for your watch, Mr. Caleb.”

Rubbing the sleep from his eyes and slipping his coat on he nodded. “Danke, Caduceus.”

“I made you a cup of tea, over by the fire. Should help you wake up for the day,” he said, patting Caleb on the shoulder before going to doze off again until the sun rose. He didn’t mention speaking to Pumat again, for which Caleb was grateful.

He thanked Caduceus again, carefully moving through the bodies of their friends to sit beside the fire. He waved his hand and reignited some of the coals, enjoying the burst of warmth. Spring was coming to the Empire, but he was still chilled. At the very least the first few rays of sun seemed to chase off the rest of their undead companions, leaving him to the quiet noises of morning in the Empire.

The tea Caduceus had set out for him was warm and strong, indeed bringing him further to alertness as he took in their surroundings and trained his ears to listen for anything suspicious.

Hearing nothing but a few scant birds and bugs, he settled down a bit to drink his tea and ruminate on everything that was happening. Frumpkin curled into a ball in his lap, tired from the long day of walking ahead, sometimes running so Caleb could scout out the road before them. Caleb let him purr and fall still, running his fingers through the orange fur as he thought.

So far, he’d been a good partner to Mollymauk. Protecting him when he could in battle, making sure that he was well hydrated and sending Frumpkin to purr on his neck when he seemed too stressed. Perhaps he could manage to keep him happy, manage to deserve the happiness Molly brought him.

The thought filled him with warmth. He was never good with words, but most of his friends had figured out he expressed his love through actions. Caleb would do whatever he could to keep Molly happy.

But the Volstrucker were out there somewhere, and he had to be ready to leave at any moment.

It wouldn’t make Molly happy, but it would keep him safe.

His note was resting in his pocket, ready to drop whenever the time came.

He looked over at all of his friends sleeping peacefully, feeling an incredible amount of warmth just from the love he felt for them. Caleb probably could have extinguished the fire and subsisted on that alone.

Beau and Yasha slept curled around each other, Yasha looking fiercely protective as always, but Beau matching her. He hadn’t gotten the chance to talk to them privately when he wasn’t dealing with his own bullshit, but Caleb was happy for them. Yasha looked a little less worried when Beau was watching her back, and Beau just looked less frustrated with the rock of a woman next to her. They were good for each other, and them having one another to rely on made Caleb less likely to worry about either of them. It was good.

It was also nice to have Fjord around to counterbalance some of Jester’s insanity. Someone with a bit more of a level head, and some common sense, was a welcome addition to their strange family. Caduceus and Yasha did their best to back Caleb up when things were getting wild, but sometimes they didn’t have the best arguments. Not to mention anyone that made Jester happy was welcome, so long as they weren’t legitimately evil. Caleb still wasn’t sure what was going on with her “god,” but he seemed to make her happy too. They’d have a talk someday, but it wasn’t hurting her for now.

Caduceus was getting happier the more they talked about going to visit the Menagerie together. Caleb was pretty sure he’d never seen the firbolg so pleased when everyone decided to join him and Fjord. In the beginning Caleb had been planning just to show appreciation by teleporting them there and joining them on the first leg of their journey. This would be very good for him to realize that the crew accepted him as a true member. Sometimes it seemed like Caduceus held back since others had known each other longer.

Caleb did wonder what the Wildmother wanted him to find in the Menagerie, and he was a little concerned about the dying Blooming Grove and the story of the Dusts, Stones, and Clays he’d heard from Caduceus before. None of it sounded particularly happy, but they could probably make it through all together.

And from this point on, he would try and keep his strongest spell of the day as an escape route.

Nott’s curse was broken, and they were probably less than a week away from achieving what he’d been working towards for the better half of the last decade. Caleb smiled and took another sip of tea as he wondered if she would still snore quite as loudly when she was a halfling. Probably not. He’d already grown accustomed to sleeping without the sound, but it had taken him almost six months to do so in the beginning. That snore meant he had someone willing to fight tooth and nail for him, just one shove away. She was a jumpy, light sleeper, just like he was, and always quick to help him with nightmares or the occasional pickpocket who thought they were an easy mark.

They were definitely not an easy mark to a casual mugger.

He sighed softly and thought of the many cons they’d pulled off in the past, a smile tugging at his lips. She would always be his dearest friend.

And Mollymauk.

Caleb never thought he could ever be so happy. This second life as Caleb Widogast was the greatest blessing he ever could have asked for.

Maybe when they got back to Nicodranas he would ask Molly if he would like to look for an apartment to share, just the two of them. It was a wild errant thought, but one Caleb couldn’t help entertaining. It would be much easier to chase private kisses if they were actually alone. And he was sure Yasha and Beau would be spending enough time together that the current apartment situation would get crowded very quickly.

It was an indulgent thought, but a good one. One he could get lost in. One he could think about for hours as he pet Frumpkin’s fur.

Caleb knew he was fucked the moment he heard the soft casting of dispel magic. It was pure luck that they timed it wrong, that they dispelled the dome before they cast the sphere of silence over him.

It was also lucky Caleb had the sense to dispel a furious hissing Frumpkin before he could get himself killed.

It was an inordinate amount of luck that Mollymauk had managed to hear him, that the purple tiefling looked up in confusion.

Then everything went red.

All he could taste was blood, and the hazy night sky went red above him.

Fear surged through him and he tried to garble out any of the spells he had memorized around the blood, trying desperately to form the syllables to at least set these bastards on fire, but the silence was still choking him and he was bleeding too much to do much of anything. Even dispelling the silence would have required sound.

At least he would die an impeccably designed death.

And hopefully Ikithon would be satisfied with spitting on his corpse and not bother to resurrect him, though he doubted it. He remembered vaguely that he needed to do something.

Something to protect Molly.

Still clutching at the hands wrapped around him, dragging him away, he moved one hand into his pocket and let the note spill out into the damp earth of the swamp.

His throat was burning with every continued drag of the rogue-like mage from the bar, and he was glad they had done it so cleanly. They could dimension door away once they got out of the bubble of silence and he fell unconscious. His friends would be safe. Molly wouldn't have a chance to get himself hurt.

Nott’s curse was broken. Yussa had a copy of his Transmogrification spell to bring Nott back into her halfling body. His friends knew he loved them. He’d gotten to kiss Mollymauk.

Maybe this was it.

Maybe that was okay.

Maybe he could slip into this blackness and just let the void take him.


	44. Stolen

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Molly just woke up, and he's definitely not a morning person. Especially not when there's people stealing his wizard.

### Chapter 44: Stolen

They were supposed to be safe in the dome. They were really supposed to be safe in the dome when there was someone taking watch. They were supposed to be safe and protected and warm.

There wasn’t supposed to be a mage after them, with some kind of rogue by their side, while Caleb was on watch. Molly didn’t know if Caleb didn’t mention that people other than the hag would be capable of destroying the hut because he wanted it to happen like this, or what. It was the small sliver of a Zemnian curse and a loud hiss from Frumpkin that woke Molly to an unnaturally quiet dawn. 

The trees above his head obscured the rising sun, but he could see the bright blue light high in the canopy, announcing the arrival of the cold morning. A bird hopped from one gray branch to another, but sang no song. Molly ran a hand through his hair, trying to figure out what on Earth had woken him up so early.

He was confused at first, unsure what exactly had woken him. Molly didn’t like waking up to silence. It reminded him too much of waking up underground, no sound around him but the thrashing of his body as he clawed himself to freedom. But he could breathe in fresh air, tasting the cool night air and trying to figure out what woke him up. His hot breath hung in the air like fog, dissipating in the damp air. 

The swamp around them was cold, biting at his flesh in a jarring way he had come to expect outside the dome in the Empire. But he was supposed to be warm, cozy and asleep near Caleb on watch _inside_ the dome.

But the tiny hut was melting away and all he could see was the last few stars of the night as the sun began to rise, a cold wind shaking through him and making him wish they’d set up the tents anyways. Last night they’d chosen to just curl around the campfire in a big pile, too exhausted to bother trying to fix stakes into the ground. Molly couldn’t tell why he was so cold. It was too early in the dawn for the dome to fall naturally, so he sat up, looking around him.

There was no sound as his sleeping bag slipped around him, no sound from birds, or frogs, or even a cricket. Wind blew through the trees around him, rustling the leaves, but there was no sound whatsoever. He knew that wasn’t right.

He should be able to hear Nott, Caduceus and Jester snoring. He should be able to hear Beau muttering in her sleep, and the faint sound of Frumpkin purring as Caleb turned pages in whatever book he found to pass the time.

Molly couldn’t even hear the blood in his ears, though he could feel it pounding as he sat up and saw the blood streaming down Caleb’s neck, the dome long gone around them. All the confused haze of the morning faded away as he remembered exactly what had woken him.

Caleb cursing softly in Zemnian, and Frumpkin letting out the most feral hiss he’d ever heard, bounding after his master’s captors.

Grabbing his scimitar and kicking as many of the group awake as he could, he bounded over, still in his armor, thank the gods. Fjord was already rubbing his eyes, his headphones slipping off as whatever music was playing from his phone was swallowed by the silence. He saw Yasha stirring, always a light sleeper like himself, and that would have to be enough. Molly couldn’t stay and wake them all carefully.

Because Caleb was practically bleeding out, and they were dragging him away, they were fucking _taking_ him.

Each step he took should have made a squelching splash, but all was eerily silent. Molly felt like he’d been transported into his own personal horror movie, the soundtrack of his life suddenly disappearing to heighten every ragged breath he took, every frantic beat of his heart.

He could feel his chest rumbling, the broken attempts at cursing them, blinding them, doing anything to slow them down getting swallowed by the quiet.

He barely recognized it was the pricks Caleb had been worried about in the bar, he was more focused on getting them to _stop._

Frumpkin was hissing up a storm, charging at the one holding Caleb and scratching deep gashes in the woman’s hands, drawing blood. Good cat. But Molly watched the other one draw a dagger and Caleb’s expression of fear forming as he snapped his fingers and sent the cat away.

Molly sliced the swords against his chest, igniting them with radiant and ice energy. Fury was burning in his heart. But he knew Caleb’s story. Behind his rage he knew who these assholes were, how well trained they would be. He remembered all of Beau’s hushed words about the boogie men of the Empire who came in the night to uphold the law of the king. They would be dangerous. But he’d picked up a fair bit about magic since meeting Caleb, and he knew one would be preoccupied holding up the silence spell that was slowly sending him into a panic. He knew how they could teleport just like Caleb and they could disappear with his wizard before Molly could even scream.

How they could take him and Molly would have no idea how to follow.

Pasts weren’t supposed to sneak up on you, and they certainly weren’t supposed to take you away from everything that you cared about. This was Caleb’s family, and he was losing blood so fast he couldn’t even try to cast a spell.

Hell, Molly wasn’t even sure if Caleb _could_ cast a spell without saying anything. The wizard always seemed to be speaking in strange arcane words when the power swirled around him. He’d only ever seen him control fire without speaking. Molly knew he couldn’t cast without cursing in Infernal, a detail he really wished wasn’t the case at the moment.

Pasts were supposed to stay buried in the fucking ground. Domes were supposed to protect the people you cared about. Friends were supposed to be able to keep you safe. Curses were supposed to land and make your enemy’s eyes bleed and go dark.

People you loved were supposed to stay alive long enough for you to tell them so.

Then, before he could close the gap between them, Molly saw the letter Caleb had given to the bartender the night before slip out of Caleb’s hand and into the damp of the swamp. He saw the look of defeat in the beautiful blue eyes before they rolled back and then fluttered shut.

People you loved weren’t supposed to give up like that.

Pure terror gripped Molly’s heart.

Maybe he wouldn’t get to Caleb in time.

Maybe Caleb would break again.

Maybe Caleb would forget him.

Maybe Jester and Caduceus wouldn’t even be able to bring him back.

Molly went straight for the throat of the one dragging Caleb, the one he assumed was some kind of arcane rogue, since no one should have been able to sneak into their camp like that, even with a silence spell. He waited to hear something, anything and hoped desperately that he had alerted the rest of the party to what was happening. Especially as the mage holding the silence spell turned his attention on him instead of helping to drag Caleb away, arcane bolts of energy flying in Molly's direction.

Molly took each one straight to the chest, ignoring the burn and slashing again, leaving the rogue to clutch at her now gored throat. An eye for an eye. A throat for a throat. She finally dropped Caleb and Molly rushed forward, trying to pull him away while putting pressure on the wound in his neck. He swallowed, feeling the vibrations in the ground as Yasha rushed past him with Fjord, both trembling with cries of fury that he couldn’t hear. Beau wasn’t far behind.

They focused on the other one to keep him from continuing to attack Molly, though he felt like he might collapse at any moment regardless. There was no time for that.

There was no medical knowledge in Molly’s four years that would help in this situation. He called out hoarsely for Jester or Caduceus, waiting for the mage to fall so someone could hear him. So someone could help him as Caleb’s blood streamed around his fingers, seeping into the wizard's white shirt, making it bloom with red flowers.

Molly could see Caleb laughing with Nott as she wound red flowers into his hair.

Molly could see Caleb, beaming at him after he’d given the wizard the find familiar spell.

Molly could see Caleb staring down at him with a shameless, enamored look, right before he kissed him.

Molly could see Caleb’s life literally slipping through his hands.

It was taking too long, and Caleb’s voice rang out in his memory, a clearer sound to hold onto in the suffocating silence. _You know where my healing potions are. Top right side of my coat, near the journal._

Molly clung to the voice like a lifeline, like it was his only hope.

He fumbled inside the coat, trying to ignore how Caleb’s eyes were shut and his pulse was weakening as the blood seeped through Molly’s fingers. Trying to ignore how Caleb wasn’t responding, not even to groan in pain. Trying to ignore how this might be a wasted effort. Top right, in a pocket near the journal kept in its holster on Caleb’s chest. His hands shook as he wondered if the wound was deep enough that the potion would leak out. He shuddered at the horrible image and pushed it away. Molly popped the cork on the vial and poured it down the unconscious man’s throat, feeling the wound close under his fingers.

But Caleb still looked too pale, and his eyes were still closed. There was a strange vibration and Molly realized he still couldn’t hear, even if Caleb was moaning in pain. He wasn’t sure if that was better or worse.

The mage took a crossbow bolt to the eye, and Molly’s voice finally rang out over the empty field, “-ester! Caduceus! More healing potions, _something!”_

There was too much blood lost. Molly knew that. He would need more healing, and he couldn’t find another vial, even as his hand thrashed through the pocket’s of Caleb’s coat.

Nott was roused at that, rushing forward with another healing potion in her hand. Molly’s hand was shaking as he tried to take it. Nott’s face was frantic as she crouched by Caleb’s head, brushing his hair back and helping to tip back his head to drink the potion. This one brought a bit more color to Caleb’s face, and Molly’s heart lurched as he felt him stirring in his arms.

Blue eyes blinked open, hazy and unfocused, but open. He mouthed something, something that looked like _Molly_ , but there was no sound. For a moment Molly thought there might be another mage in the shadows, casting a silence spell. Molly held the wizard closer, as if to shield Caleb from his past with his body alone. But there was nothing around them and Caleb feebly moved to hold Molly around the shoulders.

He couldn’t help but to break down.

Caleb was alive and he remembered him. Caleb was alive and Molly would be able to see him smile again, and wind flowers in his hair, and hold him, and tell him he loved him. His breath came out in a shaky sob, and he knew this was probably more attention than Caleb really wanted, that he was smearing Caleb’s coat with blood, but he felt like he could never let go.

He barely felt Yasha slipping Caleb’s note in his pocket as she put a hand on Caleb’s shoulder, squeezing gently. Nott let Molly hug him but kept petting his hair, cursing him out in a tender voice for making her worry like she had.

Silently, in his head, he resolved to tell Caleb he loved him as soon as the moment was right. Waiting was only going to bring him more grief. But for now he could brush the matted hair out of Caleb’s eyes and mumble that they’d never take a solo watch again.


	45. Lost and Found

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> fire, flashbacks, and friendship

### Chapter 45: Lost and Found

Still clutching at the hands wrapped around him, Caleb moved one hand into his pocket, letting the note for Mollymauk spill out into the damp earth of the swamp.

His throat was burning with every continued drag of the rogue-like mage from the bar, and he was glad they had done it so cleanly. They could dimension door away once they got out of the bubble of silence and he fell unconscious. His friends would be safe. Molly wouldn't have a chance to get himself hurt.

Nott’s curse was broken. Yussa had a copy of his Transmogrification spell to bring Nott back into her halfling body. His friends knew he loved them. He’d gotten to kiss Mollymauk.

Maybe this was it.

Maybe that was okay.

Maybe he could slip into this blackness and just let the void take him.

But then he felt the surge of healing energy close the wound on his throat. So they weren’t going to just let him die. He felt the dread curl in his stomach at the thought of seeing Ikithon again.

The second wave of healing confused him. Ikithon would want him weak, easy to push around. He opened his eyes, warmth filling his chest before he could think to worry about the situation they were in.

_Molly._

Molly was staring down at him and he looked worried sick, his shirt burned and frayed at the edges from what must have been some sort of spell. But he was here, Caleb was with his friends, and everything was going to be okay.

Caleb had to reassure the tiefling that he remembered him, though he couldn’t hear his words. Around him he could hear Beau and Nott fussing, so he knew it wasn’t the spell. His vocal cords must have suffered quite the blow. Instead he did what he could, catching the tiefling in a weak embrace.

Caleb could tell it worked, Molly burying his face in the crook of Caleb’s neck. He could feel the tears streaming down his neck, mingling with his blood. “No more solo watches. I don’t care how tired we all are.”

As Molly pulled back Caleb nodded and squeezed his hand as much as he could in his weakened state, then looked to Nott. She caught his eyes, tears streaming out of her own as she embraced him as well. “They were trying to steal you, Caleb,” she mumbled. Behind her he could see the corpses of the two scourgers. Carefully he wiped her tears away and made the hand motion for casting messages, hoping she would understand.

Nott nodded quickly, grabbing her copper wire and whispering, just for him to hear, “Do you think you can talk with this? I hope you can respond to this message.”

“I’m not sure, but I thought it worth trying,” he mouthed the words, feeling the arcane energy bring them to the goblin’s ears. She beamed at him, and he went on, “You’ll need to translate for me. I can’t say the verbal part of spells.”

“He can’t talk, but I can translate,” Nott said to everyone. The others crowded around then, wondering what he had to say but just looking at Nott.

He made the motion again, wanting to say more.

She whispered, “Go ahead. You can respond to this message.”

Speaking carefully to get the message right he said, “I cannot teleport without my voice, but I don’t want to go to a new place without healing magic. And I’d like to burn them.” He pointed to the mages slumped into a pile.

Nott frowned at that, taking his hand in hers. “Are you sure? We could do it. I know that can be hard on you. I remember before…”

Caleb shook his head quickly, pointing to his chest. He had to do it. Only he could get the fire burning hot enough. The bodies needed to be nothing but ash when they left this place behind. Only Nott had seen him break down when killing something with fire, but he could hold on to finish this.

At least he hoped he could.

What use was he if he couldn’t be strong now?

“What the hell are you two talking about?” Beau asked, staring at him. Molly was looking at him with concern too.

“He wants to burn them. I think to cover our tracks,” Nott said. Caleb nodded in agreement. Beau looked at him with even more worry then, and he could feel Yasha and Fjord’s eyes on him too in that moment.

Caleb tried to ignore them, and especially ignore whatever face Molly had to be making, staring at Nott to deliver the other half of the message.

She did, saying, “And he doesn’t want to waste healing magic, but he can’t teleport any of us without his voice.”

“That’s stupid, Caleb,” Jester said, gently nudging Nott aside to sit beside him. “I like, never use my healing spells anyways.”

Before he could protest or even roll his eyes she had a hand on his throat. He coughed as he felt the itch, not fully healed but better than it was. He rasped out, “Danke, Jester. I suppose we’ll just be careful, ja?”

The group nodded.

Yasha extended a hand and together she and Molly lifted him to his feet. “Are you sure about this? We can do it.”

He shook his head. “It will not burn hot enough, unless I do it. Unless you all have fire spells prepared today.”

Fjord, Jester, and Caduceus all looked at each other and shrugged. There was no better option. So Caleb grabbed his book and started the ritual of detect magic, most of the others leaving him to it while they got their camp packed up. He could still feel eyes on him, even as they let him work. At least from a distance they couldn’t see his hands shaking. Even Nott pretended to stop watching him after a few pointed looks. He couldn’t look at Mollymauk, not right now. Not when his past had put them all in danger.

He wanted nothing more than to be done with this and teleport to Southern Xhorhas as planned. But first he needed to make sure no one could figure out what had happened. Not passing travelers, not the hag, and especially not _him._

Moving over to the bodies, he inspected them, his stomach protesting as he found the familiar scars on their arms. Definitely Ikithon’s work. They were a bit younger than him, and he didn’t recognize them. Thankfully it wasn’t Wulf and Astrid disguising themselves, but Caleb couldn’t help but to think he really wouldn’t have come out of that encounter with his life. 

Or with any life worth living.

The anti-scrying necklaces were telling too. Perhaps he could give them to the more distinctive of the group. Shame they were all distinctive. It would be between Molly, Nott, and Jester. Maybe once Nott was changed back he could just give them to the tieflings. He slipped them in his pockets, grabbing their spellbooks and putting them in his pack. Those could be extremely useful later, so long as he didn’t let them leave his person. He was good at not letting books out of his sight by now.

He’d need a contingency plan next time, for his own spellbook and journal. Ikithon couldn’t know anything about his friends and how he might use them against Caleb, even if his cipher would be difficult for the man to crack. If he held a grudge like this, he probably would find a way.

The arcane locks on their briefcases were easy to dispel with the last of his magic for the day, save his teleportation spell, and they were mostly filled with smartly pressed clothes and notes. Clothes that would burn well. They didn’t carry much else in terms of magical objects. Nothing so suspicious as to stand out in a crowd. Just a couple of business people passing through town. Caleb stuffed the notes into his pack as well, knowing he would need to pour over them later. Maybe he could find something useful for hiding a bit better than he had.

Then his hands closed around something small and cold, down at the bottom of one of their packs.

The sending stone made his stomach positively churn. He knew exactly who would hold the matching one in Rexxentrum.

He needed to hold all of their belongings that wouldn’t burn so no one could locate them, but he couldn’t hold that stone. Not even until tomorrow when his spells would come back and he could dispel it. He wished he hadn’t wasted all his spells, all his energy trying to fight them off when it was clearly useless. He was useless.

He couldn’t hear _his_ voice and be okay. And remain sane.

“Yasha?” he asked, hoping his rasping voice would be enough to bring her over. 

She was at his side in a flash. “Are you alright?”

“Your sword. The mage slayer one.”

“Magician’s Judge,” she said, pulling it off her back. She still hadn’t cleaned their blood off it yet.

His hands shook more noticeably as he held the stone, even moving it a few feet away from the bodies sent shock waves of terror through his body. “Could you… Could you dispel the enchantment on this for me?”

“Isn’t it just a rock?” she asked, frowning at him.

Caleb shook his head. “It’s… connected. To him. I can’t hold it and I don’t want anyone else to either.”

Yasha didn’t need anything else. She squeezed his shoulder firmly and stepped back. With a woosh she drew down the sword and struck the stone. Caleb’s breath caught in his throat as the enchantment sputtered for a moment and then fizzled out as the rock cracked in two. He slipped the broken halves in his pocket and bent to work again.

She moved away again as Caleb continued to pick through their belongings. He pocketed both of their arcane focuses, and took the money from their bags and set the coins aside for the party. They had some spell components on them as well, so Caleb was able to get some chalk, ink, paper, and a sizable diamond. Later he could give that to Caduceus or Jester and hope they wouldn’t need it.

For now, he had a job to do.

Caleb stepped back, wishing there was more to inspect so he could put this off. A quick ritual identify spell to calm his nerves. Too bad he already knew quite well what they carried.

He took a deep breath, trying to steel himself. A cantrip would probably do. He could make it burn bright enough. He had always been good at that. Too good.

His hands shook in the air.

To himself he mumbled, “Sie sind bereits tot.”

_They are already dead._

Swallowing the lump in his throat, he said the arcane words and started the spark that would slowly consume their bodies. Moving the flames with his hand he directed it to consume them in their entirety, burning so brightly he could barely stand to look at it.

But he couldn’t look away.

This time there was no screaming, but gods the _smell._

Burning flesh, charring differently than animal meat over a fire, charring to ash. Hair singing and melting away.

His brain was more than happy to fill in the blanks and supply the screaming for him.

Vaguely, he was aware of how he sank to his knees in front of the pyre, watching the flames lick around the corpses.

But he was really back in Blumenthal, openly weeping and trying to rip Astrid and Wulf off of him so he could get the cart out from in front of the door. So he could save his parents. So he could get their corpses out before there was nothing to bury. So he could try to burn Ikithon alive.

Ash filled his lungs and flames licked the edges of his vision, destroying any perception of the world around him.

A soft voice rang out, breaking through the fire. “Caleb.”

That name didn’t belong. That voice didn’t belong. That voice had nothing to do with flames and brimstone.

“Caleb, can I hold your hands?”

He blinked, managing a curt nod. Having something to hold onto might be nice. Having someone stop his hands from causing more destruction was good. A figure moved into the fire, catching too, sending another surge of panic through him before he felt the touch to keep him from destroying anything else.

Soft hands enveloped his own and he was able to look down, seeing the purple and the red eye, the snaking tattoo. He latched onto the details and quietly heard someone speaking Zemnian.

_Eins, zwei, drei, vier…_

Tears sprang to his eyes. There was a sudden shift before he could remember his mother and father, _alive,_ teaching him to count on his fingers. Telling him how bright he was, beaming down at him.

Mollymauk was helping him breathe.

He was kneeling in front of him, tin of lemon candies waiting in his lap, and he was counting in Zemnian for Caleb. The shock of the tender moment completely dragged Caleb back to the present, even though he could still smell the burning flesh and hair beyond the tiefling.

He didn’t care that his friends were probably still watching. Caleb just mumbled a thank you and buried his face in the crook of Molly’s neck while the tiefling pulled him closer, rubbing soothing circles in his back. He could smell lavender and incense instead of burning.

“Du bist sicher,” Molly mumbled, his terrible accent more apparent as he tried longer sentences. It almost brought a smile to Caleb’s face.

_You are safe._

“Ich bin hier,” he went on.

_I’m here._

Then, with a little smile in his voice he said, “Ich habe nicht mehr gelernt. Tut mir leid.”

Caleb couldn’t help but to laugh as he butchered the phrase horribly. The sound came out a bit more strangled than intended

_I haven’t learned any more. Sorry._

He pulled away and wiped the tears from his eyes.

“You’re wonderful. Even though your accent is not.”


	46. Underground Again? Really?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Molly plots with Beau, and the Nein travel to Southern Xhoras

### Chapter 46: Underground Again? Really?

Molly had plans. Plans he needed help with.

“Beau, take a walk with me? Not far, just out of earshot,” Molly said, looking pointedly at Caleb. He was currently distracted by packing up his things with Nott and Jester, letting the girls talk circles around him and make sure he wasn’t over exerting himself. Caduceus had said a prayer over the ashes left of the scourgers and he and Fjord managed to get most of them in a place where the swamp would spread them out and take them the next time it rained.

Beau nodded at Molly, straying to the edges of their camp, still keeping an eye out. He made a point to watch her back, but his head was swimming with questions.

“What do you need to know?” she asked, clearly well aware of what he needed.

He sighed softly. “Too many things. The Volstrucker first, I guess. What else do you know about them? I know I could ask Caleb but I sure as hell don’t want to ask him right now.”

Beau nodded, running a hand through her hair. “Well, I already told everyone, in the Empire, people don’t think they’re real. They’re like the boogie man, a weird cautionary tale. Don’t fuck up, or the scourgers will get you. They’re untraceable and vicious. Even the Cobalt Soul has like, nothing on them. What they do have is what I’ve told them about Caleb, really.

“The only other stuff I know about them is that they’re assassins, mostly, but they’re just puppets for Ikithon. He makes them kill their families so they have no attachments to anyone but him. Caleb was like his prodigy. He was pissed when he snapped, and kept doing the experiments on his arms, the residuum crystals, even when he was in no mental state to cast spells or whatever he was making them do.”

Molly shuddered, nodding and waiting to see if she’d continue. She shrugged. “I mean, that’s kind of it. They do whatever he says, and Caleb got the fuck out of there as soon as that weird lady gave him his memories back. Killed a guard and ran like hell.”

Trying to memorize every word out of her mouth, he went on. “And you used to do shit with the black market in the Empire, right? Dark web stuff?”

“Yeah, I did. What does that have to do with it?” Beau asked, frowning at him.

Molly shook his head, “I’m not sure exactly, but the Lord of Whitestone, the guy who exports all the Whitestone and Residuum, he’s a good guy. Like he knows the value of working with the black market, making sure all relations are good. He keeps an eye on them since he knows otherwise it would get out of control. And I don’t think he’d like that Ikithon is torturing kids with his crystals. He doesn’t let that shit go out unregulated, so either Ikithon is taking it and lying, or he’s getting it from somewhere else.”

Beau blinked. "You mean that guy from the weird vampire documentary that came out a few years ago?"

"Yeah, _Briarwood Bloodshed._ That's the guy."

Beau nodded slowly, and Molly could see the gears turning in her head as they spoke. He was right to have come to her first. “The dude would be a very powerful ally. He’s fucking loaded.”

“Exactly. Would you know anyone that could be plugged in to trading illegal residuum? Or we could always just ask Jester to send the guy a message,” Molly said, looking back at the group. The tiefling in question was currently wrestling with her hot pink sleeping bag, trying to get it rolled up so it fit in the pouch it came with. An impossible feat, but she was determined. Eventually she got it, splitting a seam in the bag and mending it quickly with a sheepish look.

Staring a Jester for a moment, Beau sighed, “I’ll reach out to some people I know first. Try and feel things out. Jester might not make the best first impression. She always asks if I’m pooping when she sends me a message magically.”

Molly only snorted, letting Beau lead him back to the others. He had other questions, but they could wait. They still needed to teleport today, and hopefully cover some ground in Southern Xhorhas before the sun set. He’d been hoping to work on this quietly, with the support of Marion Lavorre or something, not on his own. But he couldn’t get the images out of his mind of Caleb bleeding from his neck. Caleb sinking to his knees staring at the pyre that could have easily been him, or his childhood friends.

He felt Caleb’s note in his breast pocket. The note he’d read at least ten times now, scrawled in Caleb’s loopy infernal script.

> _Mollymauk,_
> 
> _Please do not try to follow me. It’s not safe. I cherish you and our friends too much to allow you to get hurt or killed over this._
> 
> _I care for you deeply, endlessly._
> 
> _Yours,  
>  C.W._

It was time.

When Caleb first started helping him to read again, this really wasn't what he was expecting. He never wanted to read anything like it again.

Hopefully Beau’s old contacts would pull through and he could find a way to take Ikithon down in a way that would keep Caleb from feeling the deep sense of fear he always seemed to carry. 

As much as he wanted to slit the old bastard’s throat, especially right now, this was the way to do it. He’d looked up the guy on Wikipedia countless times, imagining where his weak spots might be. Molly was pretty sure if he could get the jump on him and cut out his tongue, he could finish the job without getting too badly injured.

In the beginning he’d dismissed that thought as too brutal, but he was still shaking with rage and fear from this morning.

“Is everyone ready?” Caleb’s voice, still rough from the ordeal, rasped out, drawing Molly’s attention. Caduceus had wrapped some bandages soaked with a slow acting healing balm to help prevent scarring around the wizard’s neck, but Molly could still see the deep red blooms on his shirt. They would need to wash it or something so Molly didn’t go insane. He was sure Nott didn’t like seeing it either.

They all moved to the circle Caleb had drawn in the space their camp had once been, waiting for him to finish the last few lines and send them through the glowing portal.

“Caleb?” Yasha asked, almost bumping into Fjord in the darkness.

“Where the hell are we, Caleb?” Jester asked, looking around. Beau was pulling up her cell phone light before Caleb shot up four globes of light into the space. 

He looked around them, taking in the crumbling rock and grabbing Molly’s hand immediately. “Apologies, I’ve never actually used this circle. We’re in Draconia. I believe somewhere in the castle.”

Molly swallowed, squeezing Caleb’s hand in the darkness and grabbing his tin of lemon candies with the other. It didn’t quite smell like dirt, but there was a heavy smell of rot around them that made his stomach turn. With his darkvision and Caleb being the one to control the lights, they led the way, moving a bit ahead in Molly’s eagerness to get the fuck out of there. He didn’t have enough candies for this to last much longer.

“Why do you even have that circle?” Molly mumbled, squeezing Caleb’s hand tighter.

“To run further away.”

Caleb’s voice was barely a whisper, still ragged from the dagger wound.

Molly sighed softly, moving the lemon candy over his tongue. “I think I understand that more now.”

He could feel the man shiver, nodding, “They are… efficient. I’m surprised the group could take them, to be perfectly honest.”

"We weren't going to let them take you, Caleb." Molly couldn't form a decent argument in the moment to convince Caleb he was worth it, that he would never stop looking, but he could try. Caleb didn’t push it, just continuing to lead them out and rubbing slow, grounding circles on the back of Molly’s hand with his thumb.

If stepping into the small town in the Empire to prepare for their fight with Isharnai felt like stepping back in time, walking through the portal in Draconia felt like walking into a dystopian future. Buildings were rubble, there was little sign of life beyond rats and other vermin scavenging the few scraps left behind.

Beyond the destruction of the fallen city was the rest of the Dreemoth Ravine. 

“I was told we might be able to get some supplies from the local Ravenites, but they mostly keep to themselves after Draconia fell,” Caleb explained to the group, pointing out the small town where he was headed on a map on his phone. The reception was nonexistent here, but he must have saved it earlier.

Molly couldn’t blame the Ravenites for keeping to themselves. He’d met enough Draconian refugees to know they’d had it rough.

In the end they chose Caduceus and Fjord to go into the small village and ask about purchasing or trading for supplies. Even with Jester and Caduceus being able to make magical mush food and Caleb with his weird little boba, everyone decided real food might be preferable. They might have been there to support the Wildmother worshippers, but they weren’t excited about suffering during the pilgrimage. This was supposed to be more relaxed, a real camping trip. At least for part of it.

For the first time since they’d seen the figures from Caleb’s past, Molly took a deep breath of relief. They’d done it, they’d gotten Nott’s curse removed, and they were okay. After this little pilgrimage they’d go back home and get Nott back in her body and get back to the real world. Molly wanted to take a hot shower as soon as possible. He wanted to get somewhere with free wifi and scroll through all of his social media pages without using up more of his data with shitty reception. His phone bill was going to suffer as it was already.

But for now it was nice to see everyone a bit more relaxed, and it was much better to be back somewhere warm. Beau spent some time at the top of a tree, claiming she got some reception up there. Winking at Molly as she came back, he could figure what she was doing up there. They would figure out this scourger bullshit and make sure Caleb felt safe if they had to die trying. But for the moment at least, death seemed far away and everyone could at least take a deep breath.

Yasha calmed a bit when she found the group was much further south than where she’d grown up in the Iothia Moorland. There were a bunch of new flowers that she’d never seen before, outside of the internet and her guidebooks. Molly was glad to take off his coat, leaving on his armor but letting the sun hit his skin and warm him as he wandered and picked up new flowers for her to take a look at. The new ones she took graciously, and the others she allowed Molly to wind through her braids.

Jester and Nott wound flowers into each other’s hair, then started making their rounds on everyone else. It would be a task to get flowers stuck in Fjord’s hair, so Molly moved to show them how to weave flower crowns out of the wildflowers. Yasha collected them in her notebook, pressing each one and finding them in a small field guide that Caduceus had given her. Once she found them she would show the others, telling the meanings of each one and writing them alongside each pressed flower.

Molly made her a crown of the little yellow ones that meant happiness. It stood out with her outfit of all blacks and blue and yellows and she beamed as he handed it to her. He turned over the pages in her book, trying to find the perfect one for Caleb. The little white lacy ones supposedly represented sanctuary, and they were everywhere and had nice long stems for winding together. Not to mention they looked beautiful with Caleb’s red hair, even though the wizard was too focused on one of the books from the scourgers to realize anything had been put on his head. It was, quite frankly, adorable, and he definitely wanted to tell the wizard he loved him on the spot. But with the man pouring over the books of the people who slit his throat that morning, it kind of ruined the mood.

Molly did manage to convince him to take a break and hand over his bloodied shirt, enjoying the expanse of freckles he caught a fleeting glimpse of as Jester gave Caleb a spare shirt. It was a silly shirt with a cartoon cat on it, and it definitely lightened everyone’s spirits. Beau was dying for something else to do, so she disappeared again to try and wash some of the blood stains out of the white thing. Molly didn’t bother to tell her it was probably a lost cause. They all wanted to feel useful.

His real achievement of the day was a little collar of baby daisies that he managed to slip around Frumpkin’s neck. He picked up the familiar and looked the cat in the eye. “Now, listen, I know you hate them, but think about how cute Caleb will think you are when he finally looks up from that book.”

The cat gave him an unimpressed look, about to bat them off. “Okay, okay, if you can make him smile, really smile, with the flowers on, being super cute, I’ll give you some of my dinner. Meat, the good stuff.”

The bengal blinked slowly, and Molly wondered how foolish he looked bargaining with the cat, but he scampered over to Caleb’s lap, curling up and exposing his tummy while purring up a storm. Caleb still hadn’t looked up, but absentmindedly scritched at the soft fur, looking content.

Molly was quite pleased with himself, leaning back to let Jester and Nott braid every flower they could find into his hair. It was getting longer, but they still kept it to two pigtails. Maybe he’d dye it when they got back home. He was ready for a change, something to feel even more flamboyant. It had been ages since he’d gotten a new piercing or tattoo. Later he’d ask Jester for some paper so he could sketch something out. For now, the other tiefling was quite busy wrestling Beau into submission.

After Jester dragged Beau into her schemes her top knot overflowed with little blue flowers. Molly was halfway convincing everyone to take silly selfies with him when they saw their local Wildmother worshippers back on the horizon.

Fjord and Caduceus came back with some supplies enough to make decent food, and a lunch of some real sandwiches from a deli in town. Caleb looked up from the book then, and Molly could hear the man’s stomach growl from across the small field. But he was distracted for a moment by Frumpkin’s cute collar, beaming his wonderful smile at the cat and holding him like you would a child while cooing in Zemnian. Definitely a success. Molly took two reubens, and plopped down next to Caleb with the sandwiches. He passed the wizard one and bit into his own, winking at the cat. It was still warm, and Molly made such a dirty moan eating it that Caleb’s cheeks turned pink.

He couldn’t blame himself for it; the reuben was fucking delicious. But he might have done it anyway if he’d known it would do that to the wizard. Caleb had calmed down extensively after they caught the Volstrucker chasing them and left the Dwendalian Empire. It was nice to see his shoulders sink into a relaxed pose, grinning with Nott and Jester as they all kept him calm.

Caleb definitely didn’t look like he’d almost died and had a terrible flashback this morning. He actually looked more calm than he had in days now that the scourgers were dead.

“So are those spellbooks good? Probably no water damage,” Molly asked, eating some of the french fries.

Caleb nodded, “They are very powerful, and extremely useful. There are some spells I’d lost that I’ll be able to copy again, and Yussa will be pleased to see them as well. Not common in Nicodranas, most of these. This spell, here, would be much much better than the dome, once I’m strong enough to cast it. Nothing like… what happened, could happen again.”

Molly hummed around his food, swallowing before mumbling, “That would be preferable, yes.”

“But this would be a door, leading to a pocket dimension. I can design the whole thing however we like, and once we’re inside the door can be invisible. Much less conspicuous.” Caleb had the bright spark in his eye that appeared whenever he talked about new magic, but Molly was mostly concerned with getting enough food in him. 

He managed to convince Caleb to eat while he asked questions about the new spells, slowly passing Frumpkin morsels when Caleb was looking in the books. Everyone was much happier packing up with some real warm food in them, all decked out in flower crowns (Molly had made sure they had two for Fjord and Caduceus as well, leaving Jester to convince the half orc to accept his gift of the little white flowers. Caduceus accepted his pink crown with his easy smile, as always.).

Before they set out after lunch, Caduceus addressed the group, “Now I do want to warn people, I’m expecting this to be just as dangerous as the land around the hag’s hut. The Dusts have an online presence. They’re quiet and they don’t say much, but one of them posts pictures of things made in the forge on Facebook. I messaged them online and they said most of my family members passed through there, then weren’t heard from again after they headed here. This place, the Stones and the Cave of Remembrance? Nothing. Not even a grainy photograph. I’ve been researching for years, still nothing. I don’t know what might have happened to them, but I doubt it’s good. I’d understand if some of you might want to stay with the Ravenites or camp around here, or even go home with Caleb.” It was strange to see the man so serious with a big pink flower crown. Still, somehow it suited him well.

“I’m sorry it’s going to be hard, Caduceus,” Jester said, catching the firbolg’s hand and squeezing it gently with murmurs of consenting reassurance from the group. None of the small family wanted to leave. “But I’m sure we’ll figure it out. We’re good at solving problems together!”

The firbolg smiled his broad smile, “I’m sure we can manage, but I did pick up more healing potions while we were there. Fjord, Jester, and I can all heal ourselves. So who wants one? They only had three.”

“I’ve still got the one Caleb gave me!” Nott said, smiling. Then she frowned down on it, “Or is this one of Yeza’s? Can’t tell.”

“I’ve got one left too,” Molly said, shooting the wizard a look to let him know he’d figured out Caleb had snuck one his bag too. The man needed to find a way to tell he cared about people to their faces instead of just quietly giving them expensive magic items. Especially without telling them. Molly wasn’t too pleased to find the thing while packing up that morning. He would have used it on Caleb on the spot if the ridiculous wizard hadn’t refused vehemently. But it was reassuring to have something helpful in his pocket in case someone went down again.

Caduceus grinned, “Perfect! Beau, Caleb, and Yasha, you take these then.”

There was no arguing, and they were ready to venture into the unknown yet again.


	47. Happy Campers

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jester makes a dick joke, they roast hot dogs and make s'mores, they play campfire games, and this story starts to feel a bit more like the modern au it is

### Chapter 47: Happy Campers 

While it was nice to be back somewhere warm as spring came to Exandria, Caleb could have done without the humidity as they traveled further south into an area closer to a jungle than anything else. He could feel his hair sticking to the back of his neck, but he wasn’t exactly sure how to tie his hair back with the flower crown Molly had made for him. Eventually Nott tugged on his sleeve, motioning to be put on his shoulders.

She might have actually been tired and wanting a little break from walking, but she carefully braided his hair under the crown. When it came to her, he was basically an open book these days. Couldn’t even hide his sweaty neck. At least she could tell his sore throat wasn’t bad enough to carry her like this. Well, for a bit. Nott pulled loose strands out of his face and kissed him on top of the head before motioning to get put back down and holding his hand.

He took it, even though he knew it was probably uncomfortable to stretch her arm up like that. Caleb could tell she was still upset about this morning. Nott hadn’t seen him go down like that in quite a long time. It was different from the few times she had to take care of him when they were on the road and there were muggers or others not pleased with the appearance of a beggar man and a goblin girl. Even if they didn’t usually have any healing magic available. The cuts and bruises were nothing like he’d suffered under Ikithon, but Nott was always fussing over him like a worried family member. Though the injuries weren’t that bad, he had the scars to remember, even if his memory hadn’t been perfect. He could remember all too well how distraught she was when she told him they were taking him.

He thought she understood more than the others. That his company was never a guarantee. That the people from his past were worse than those who had thrown the two of them in jail, or those who had thrown them out of hotels, bars, shops, everywhere. 

Of course she could have been lulled into a false sense of security, living with him without interference from anyone in the Cerberus Assembly for the past nine years. Caleb almost was. Not that there was much he could do about it, now that he was unwilling to run.

It was a strange feeling, to have something he cared for so strongly he wasn’t willing to leave it behind.

But it was a strong, pervasive feeling that had crept into his bones when he wasn’t looking. He felt it as he held Nott’s hand, as he watched Jester and Molly talk about their horn jewelry and new piercings, as he saw Caduceus and Yasha discussing the new tropical flowers, as he saw Fjord coaching Beau on how to smile in a casual, carefree way.

It was certainly strange, but he wasn’t giving it up for anything.

It was probably a good thing his note for Molly had gotten lost in the swamps of the Empire.

Things already felt better since they spent an entire day without being attacked, finding a nice place along the pathway in the rainforest that had clearly been used as a campsite before. Nott and Caleb had been traveling in silence for the past few hours, but he’d asked her to help him find dry branches as they walked. She found them and he gathered them in his arms, feeling rather productive until they finally got to the little campsite.

Jester squealed, “Now we can be camping for real!”

“Would you like to start singing now, or later?” Caduceus asked, smiling softly at his fellow cleric as he pulled out some more traditional camping food, always the people pleaser. It was a good thing Fjord had been cooking alongside his firbolg roommate for so long though, since Caduceus really didn’t know how to cook meat.

Jester eagerly grabbed her hot dog to roast, getting pointers from Fjord (that she 100% didn’t need, working with food for a living now at the café), and insisting that they sing as much as possible. Of course no one knew the same songs, so it was mostly Jester, Nott, and Molly singing pop songs while slowly passing Caleb, Beau, and Fjord enough of the beer they’d grabbed to get them to join in. Caduceus was more than willing to hum along with the songs he didn’t know, teaching them a few more folksy sounding ones while he prepared side dishes and a salad. Yasha was quiet for the most part, but didn't seem upset by the singing if the way she was looking at Beau as if the woman was the sun itself was any indication.

Fjord presented Jester with some graham crackers and chocolate so they could make s’mores out of the rest of her marshmallows, to which he received a kiss on the cheek that sent his face into a deeper shade of green than Caleb had ever seen. When she left to roast her marshmallows, Fjord’s hand dipped subconsciously to the sapphire symbol of the Wildmother she’d made for him.

Soon their voices were hoarse and they were all busy roasting hot dogs and marshmallows to focus on singing, so Jester pulled out her radio. She squealed as some of her favorite local stations from the Menagerie Coast were finally available again and hummed along to the music while eating what had to be her tenth marshmallow. “What do we do now?” she asked, mouth full.

“Anyone know a good campfire game?” Fjord asked, looking around and pulling his hot dog off from over the coals.

Beau shrugged, “Never have I ever? We’ve got alcohol; could be fun.”

“Some people should probably stay sober,” Caduceus pointed out.

“You and Jester can play with no booze, no one really cares,” Beau said, eating her hot dog straight off the stick and not bothering with a bun. Jester made a few jokes about the phallic nature of the action and had ended up with marshmallow goo smeared across her forehead.

After cleaning up the marshmallow, Jester looked around the group. “Okay, so how do we play?”

“I’ll start,” Nott said. “Never have I ever been to Port Damali. Now you drink if you _have_ been there. So start chugging, Fjord.”

Fjord rolled his eyes, taking a sip but not saying anything to complain about the obvious dig. He had the constitution to handle it. Beau and Yasha drank too, but that was about it.

“Your turn, Caleb!” Jester grinned, excited to keep the game going.

He rubbed his chin slowly. “Ah… Never have I ever… used a lighter.”

Everyone who was drinking groaned, taking a sip. Molly cackled beside him, “I think I understand the game now. Never have I ever had childhood memories.”

Caleb rolled his eyes and took his first sip. “It doesn’t have to be that way. It can just be fun in the beginning.”

Nott grinned, punching his shoulder lightly. “Well I’m glad you’re ready to have fun again!”

Jester was humming, trying to think of a good one. “Never… Never have I ever had sex.”

Caleb felt his eyes roll again. They really were just trying to get everyone drunk. He was glad that Caduceus and Jester weren’t drinking. Not that either of them would have taken a sip for that one. Beau was up next. “You can also use it like truth or dare, to find out weird stuff about people. Like never have I ever kissed a dude.”

“Like romantically, or does family count? I’ve kissed Colton on the cheek plenty; he hates it,” Caduceus said, grinning.

“Yeah, romantically. You’re good, Cad,” Beau said.

Caleb sighed softly, taking a slow sip and trying not to feel eyes on him. Jester didn’t even drink, which was almost surprising, if he wasn’t sure she would have gushed to him about her first kiss the moment it happened. Nott and Molly drank as well. Fjord, Yasha, and Beau didn’t drink either, leaving all the people who had kissed men sitting on one log.

Caleb was very pointedly staring at his beer bottle and not Jester waggling her eyebrows at him dramatically from her seat. Yasha was trying to think of one when Molly leaned over, whispering in Caleb’s ear, “Are you counting me as a man, or someone else?”

He supposed he shouldn’t be surprised about the question. They’d discussed pronouns in the beginning and Caleb knew Mollymauk didn’t really care what people called him, though people tended towards he/him. But he still couldn’t help the blush on his cheeks as he mumbled that it was someone else. They weren’t really worth mentioning, the small fumblings he’d had with others before Astrid at the Soltryce Academy. He wasn’t very open about being bi, only because he’d never been interested in pursuing a relationship after his time being trained as a Volstrucker.

Thankfully he was saved from both Molly and Jester’s inquisitive stares by Yasha finally figuring hers out. “Never have I ever drunk dialed someone.”

Molly sighed and took a sip, as did Nott and Beau, and to Caleb’s surprise, Fjord. The half orc didn’t strike him as a particularly messy drunk, but he’d never seen him really wasted either. He never had anyone to call while drunk, mostly because he only ever got drunk with the people he wanted to be around to begin with. No point in calling Nott drunk to tell her he cared about her when she was sitting next to him.

“Let’s see. Never have I ever stolen something,” Caduceus said, nodding to himself and looking at the group. 

Everyone else but Fjord drank, and Molly raised a brow at Caleb. “You don’t strike me as the type.”

“It was mostly helping Nott, but we ran quite a good con back in the day,” he said with a shrug. Nothing to be ashamed of, stealing from rich assholes in the Empire.

Molly nodded while Nott sent him a wicked grin. She said, “You’re not the only one full of bullshit, Tealeaf.”

He laughed while Fjord tried to come up with his own. “Umm…” Fjord looked into his beer bottle. “Never have I ever… gone skinny dipping.”

Caleb didn’t have time to do such a thing in his youth. He wasn’t counting the few times he washed up in rivers or streams while living rough, since he never did much more than a sponge bath in fear of being caught without his clothes on by muggers, monsters, or even scourgers. He was afraid of just about everything then, and felt very justified in that. He watched as only Beau, Yasha, and Caduceus drank.

Caduceus looked around them in surprise. “Oh, really? There were hot springs near the Blooming Grove where I grew up. I think it had to do with the Wildmother being worshipped there since there are supposed to be some around here too. Natural wonders and all that jazz.”

Caleb’s heart sank as Jester’s entire face lit up with a mischievous glow. “Oh. My. Gosh. You. Guys!”

“Jessie,” Fjord mumbled, his cheeks darkening again.

“We _have_ to go find them!” she said, clapping her hands together.

Beau and Yasha didn’t look opposed, sharing noncommittal shrugs with Caduceus. Molly looked just about as excited as Jester did, grinning wickedly while his tail flicked back and forth.

Nott looked like she might melt into a nervous puddle on the spot. She’d gotten out of years of beach trips and Jester’s few occasional suggestions of going to bathhouses without too much questioning over the years. Even with the group now knowing about the Hag and the goblins, she didn’t like to dwell on how she had drowned. All the stress of the day seemed to be crashing down on her shoulders and she looked like she was on the brink of tears.

Jester hadn’t noticed at all, casting a location spell and squealing when they were only a few hundred feet away.

Caleb clasped a hand over Nott’s shoulder. “Someone will have to keep watch over our things. Nott has darkvision, so together we can look over the campsite.”

She looked up at him gratefully, a small clawed hand covering his own. “We’ll scream if something happens, yeah?”

But Fjord frowned, “I’m not sure we should split up the group. We haven’t set our stuff up for the night; we can just bring our stuff over there and put out the fire for now, right?”

“You don’t have to go in if you don’t want to, Nott. You can sit on the edge and keep an eye out so no one sees us naked!” Jester said with a warm smile.

Nott seemed to settle at that. Caleb sighed softly. There went his excuse to avoid this nonsense. He wished that he had some incense so he could transform Frumpkin into something that could swim with him. Not that the cat would enjoy it. And he wouldn’t really enjoy petting an octopus as much. He couldn’t even polymorph into an otter or something and keep his clothes on since he was out of spells. Of course that took the skinny out of the dipping.

Might as well suck it up and try not to stare at Mollymauk for an hour or two until Jester had her fill.


	48. Skinny Dipping

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Nein goes skinny dipping and everything is soft and tender

### Chapter 48: Skinny Dipping 

Molly could have kissed Fjord. Of course no one was really that keen on even platonic kissing when Jester was around to tease. He could get away with it with Yasha, but anyone else was pushing it. The half orc he barely knew would just have to feel his appreciation radiating off of him. Skinny dipping was the perfect ridiculous end to this increasingly insane day. Taking a dip in a natural hot spring with a beer in hand sounded like the perfect way to chase away the nightmares he knew were coming for him as soon as his head hit the pillow. He was exhausted, but he knew that he would dream of the scourgers, of Caleb being taken. No amount of s’mores and flower crowns could keep them at bay.

He’d stay up as long as he could. Maybe he’d take first watch.

But for now he could make a show of stripping with no shame and see how many people he could make blush or piss off. He was at the very least hoping to piss off Beau and get a little blush out of Caleb. However at this point in the day, he’d take what he could get.

“Could you be like ten percent less cocky about everything right now, Mollymauk?” Nott grumbled, shielding her eyes.

Jester snorted, “Cocky-” before devolving into giggles and joining Molly in his nudity. It wasn’t much more clothing than he wore on the stage at the Lavish Chateau, so he wasn’t really uncomfortable as he slipped in the hot water beside her. Pissing off Nott wasn’t his goal, but it would do.

The hot water enveloped him and he let out a low moan. Feeling the steaming water work the stress out of his muscles was too good, and the thought of maybe earning that blush from Caleb was too good. But Caleb was busy reading his spellbook and setting up the dome around them, so it was tricky to tell if the pink on his cheeks was any darker than usual. The globes of light floated in the air and Molly felt like a fairy or a nyad.

It was floaty and peaceful and he was very very grateful to Fjord for the accidental suggestion.

Caduceus poured something into the water that made it bubble and foam, “It’s not quite a bath, but this won’t hurt the soil or plants around and it might help with some feeling uncomfortable.” 

Molly settled down on the small stone ledge that was probably shaped by some kind of druid (he wasn’t sure, but that sounded like something Reani would do), and luxuriated in the sweet smelling foam that started to melt away all the dirt, sweat, and stress of the day. Fjord and Beau were more comfortable slipping in then, Caduceus and Yasha not far behind.

Nott had situated herself a few feet away from the spring, unfolding her sleeping bag and building a small campfire for Caleb to light for her when he got the chance. He did so, making sure she was comfortable and could see okay in the dome. Caleb slipped in last, making a careful pile of his spellbooks and pack, slipping a necklace around Nott’s throat and asking her to hold them. Everyone looked away respectfully, letting the nervous man slip into the water in between Jester and Molly, the only space left.

Molly could only offer a lazy smile, too content to come up with any meaningful words. Beau and Jester were busy teasing Fjord about something. Caduceus and Yasha chattered softly about the jungle plants, both truly comfortable with bathing outside, no matter who saw.

Dunking his face under the water and coming back up, Molly rubbed his hands over his eyes, trying to get some of the dirt off. Traveling through the jungle had been sticky and kind of awful, but he would take it any day over being attacked by weird fucking mages in the Empire. Beside him Caleb took off the flower crown and tipped his hair back to clean it slightly before returning to crossing his arms close over his chest. Lately the wizard had been going without his bandages, especially when it grew too hot. Still, now that his arms were bare, Molly could see him nervously hiding them in the water.

Carefully, under the bubbles, Molly’s tail rubbed over the scars in gentle circles, which made Caleb start before looking over a bit sheepishly. He unwound himself, letting Molly’s tail wrap around his wrist as he leaned back and tried to relax. Beau passed him another beer and Frumpkin moved to purr behind his head. Slowly, Caleb started to unwind, talking a bit with Jester about her first camping experience. She was pretty pleased, but she decided they hadn’t done enough singing and turned on the radio again. Everyone vehemently denied her from taking a selfie with everyone in the spring to document her first skinny dipping experience, even when she promised not to share it, sending Molly into a fit of giggles as he polished off his beer.

Everyone was much more relaxed with the hot water soothing away their worries, but slowly they started yawning and peeling off from the group. Yasha was first, leaving with a smothered yawn and going to set up her bedroll. Molly reveled in how darkly Beau blushed when the woman stood up without warning, even though he was pretty sure those two had seen that much already. Fjord followed quickly after, begging Nott to get him a towel before he stood up and not taking it very kindly when she seemed to deliberate a bit too long.

Beau followed not long after, Caduceus stepping out after her and getting his normal nighttime tea prepared over the fire.

Caleb seemed to relax even more with just Jester and Molly by his side, talking nonsense, and he let the tieflings ask him simple questions about what they might do when they get back, what Jester’s first tattoo should be, where Molly should get his next piercing, simple nothings that he could hum in agreement to. The wizard had settled into the mossy side of the hot spring, reclining his head back as he sat with Frumpkin purring around him in a semicircle, quietly grooming his damp hair.

“I never want to leave this spot. If I had a crummy romance novel I didn’t care about getting wet, everything would be perfect,” he mumbled, eyes closed. Molly could see the silvery line of a scar, almost completely healed by Jester and Caduceus, but still there just as a slightly different texture along his neck.

Jester laughed but the sound was quickly swallowed by a yawn. “True, but we have to rest soon.”

“We could take the first watch from in here. I doubt there’s anything we could see from two feet higher up in the dark anyways,” Molly said, not at all uneager to share a private moment with the wizard in the hot spring. Even if he was too exhausted to talk about anything important.

Jester nodded, slipping out and sending Caleb’s cheeks into a very delicious pink as he looked pointedly at Molly’s horn and nothing else. She giggled and threw a towel around herself. “I’ll figure out who can take the second watch with me. Wake me up when it’s time, okay?”

“Will do!” Molly grinned after her, settling himself back into the water and wondering if it would make Caleb uncomfortable if he slipped an arm around the wizard’s shoulders, now hunched up again in embarrassment.

Caleb was busy instructing Frumpkin to do something, and Molly watched as the cat slipped outside the dome then found himself settled on top of it, looking around the forest for any sign of danger. With that, Molly relaxed even more, but Caleb still seemed a bit wired. Couldn’t have that.

“Want me to rub your shoulders? Yasha tells me I’m pretty good at it, though I’m not sure anyone could be as skilled as her,” Molly asked.

The redhead blinked, still flushed from the nudity or the hot water or both, “Why would you do that?”

“You look stressed.”

He frowned, “Don’t I always?”

“Yeah,” Molly shrugged, “but I think it’s illegal to be stressed in a hot spring. You could get a towel or something if you want. No one cares about the skinny dipping part now.”

Caleb chewed his lip. “I don’t want to get up.”

Molly waited, not wanting to pressure anything, still rubbing small circles on the back of Caleb’s hand with his tail. Absentmindedly, Caleb turned his hand, catching the tail gently and rubbing it back. A shockwave washed through Molly, leaving him pleasantly tingly as the wizard made up his mind and turned so that he could get his back rubbed.

Caleb jumped when Molly’s hands finally rested over his shoulders. “Too much?” Molly asked, keeping the touch light.

He shook his head, “It’s fine. Just a little on edge.”

“Well, that’s what this is for. Why don’t you tell me more about the pocket dimension hut?”

Caleb melted backwards just a hair more as Molly started digging his fingers in the tense flesh. “It will be far more than a hut. It will be like traveling with a real archmage. The original spell is called a ‘magnificent mansion’ which is a little ridiculous, but not entirely inaccurate. The alliteration is nice at least.”

Humming, Molly worked on getting out the knots in the wizard’s back created by years of stooping over a desk, sleeping in strange places, and just generally not taking care of himself. Caleb’s voice was soft and steady, lulling him into a sense of peace. “-and I should be able to design each room to everyone’s tastes. Like making sure Caduceus and Veth’s furniture is all the right size, and putting a mirror on the top of Beau’s bed.”

Molly took a second to process that. “A… mirror?”

“As much as I do not want to know anything about Beau’s sex life, as her roommate, I know plenty,” Caleb said, a smirk in his voice that Molly was dying to see. To kiss. Maybe not while they were in a semi-dangerous jungle. And talking about his old roommate’s sex life.

The tiefling could only laugh, trying to keep it quiet enough not to disturb any of their sleeping friends and eventually giving up and dunking his head under the water to smother the sounds.

He pulled up only to find a buttercup smeared against his forehead. “Shit. Forgot about all the flowers up there.”

Caleb was grinning at him, gently picking the flower off of him and placing it on the side of the hot spring. “Turn around, I’ll get them.”

Molly did just that, feeling the deft fingers of the wizard as he carefully unwound each plait and picked out the myriad of flowers Jester and Nott had wound in that morning. He was mostly focusing on not audibly moaning, but his tail wrapped around Caleb’s bare chest probably was indication enough of how incredibly tender it all felt. It made him amend his wish for a hot shower into a hot shower with Caleb alongside him, not even sexually (mostly), just washing each other’s hair. It was horrifically domestic.

“Lean your head back?” Caleb asked, gently guiding his shoulder back so he could massage Molly’s scalp, undoing the rest of the tangles with the help of whatever Caduceus had poured in the water.

It was impossible not to let out a small sound at the motions then, Molly opening his eyes to Caleb chuckling overtop of him. “What? You’re good with your hands,” Molly teased.

Pink rushed to Caleb’s cheeks, but instead of looking away or changing the topic, he pressed a quick kiss to Molly’s forehead.

Not able to help it but to beam, Molly sat up and pressed a light kiss to Caleb’s neck as he wrapped an arm around him. Soft snores proved their moment of relative privacy, Caleb seemingly comfortable enough to rest his head on Molly’s shoulder. “Anything you want in your room?”

“You?” Molly asked, trying to keep the smile off his face and failing miserably.

Caleb’s cheek felt warm against Molly’s skin, but he pressed a chaste kiss to his purple collarbone. “That can be arranged.”

“What will you make for Nott?” Molly asked, interested mostly in how animated Caleb got when talking about the spell.

“Well, she’ll need a kind of laboratory. We could both use it, and even Yeza if he and Luc ever want to travel with us. Not to places like this, but maybe someday. I think I’d focus on making Luc an amazing room too. He deserves it.”

He hummed, rubbing circles in Caleb’s shoulder and kissing his temple. “What about Jester?”

“I’d probably make a version of her room in the Lavish Chateau. But more adult. I bet I could make all her murals and paintings move.”

Molly blinked. “That sounds amazing. I bet Yasha would like that too, with flowers.”

Caleb nodded, lost in thought, the deeply reverent tone in his voice as he kept talking about the magic, “I can make a library with all the books I’ve seen in the past month and lots of stained glass. We can’t have real windows in a pocket dimension, so probably stained glass everywhere. And a large kitchen. We should be able to eat like kings. Every room should have a big fireplace. And books. And maybe a big bathtub, always full and piping hot. Like this, but with less dirt.”

“Can you do that?” Molly asked. He wasn’t sure why he asked, if the man could make animated murals.

Caleb grinned, pulling back, “I can make it exactly how we want it. I’ll need to work on all the designs while I get stronger, but with all the fighting we’ve been doing lately I think I’ll get there soon.”

“Don’t throw yourself into fights just to get stronger now,” Molly chastised, but there was still a hint of worry in his voice.

He laughed, “Don’t worry about that; I may be eager to do it, but I’m still not an idiot.”

Molly rolled his eyes, “I’m not sure I’d ever call you an idiot, even if you do stupid stuff sometimes.”

Caleb moved back to lean against Molly’s shoulder, sighing softly in contentment. “I just want everyone to be safe.”

Molly nodded, chewing his lip. He was pretty sure that Caleb didn’t include himself in that statement, at least not with the same weight as the others. Kissing Caleb’s temple, Molly rubbed at the man’s forearm. 

“Me too.”


	49. Modern Literature

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's always awkward when your new friends don't understand your inside jokes.....

### Chapter 49: Modern Literature 

Molly wasn't sleeping that well after their watch. Caleb had seen him relax a bit after getting away from the Empire and relax more after he got in the hot spring, but it still wasn't enough. With just enough beer left in his system to ignore how Jester might react, he shuffled his bedroll a bit closer and snaked an arm around Molly’s waist.

With Caduceus and Jester on watch, he knew the little action wouldn’t go unnoticed, but at least the dark of night kept the blush from showing on his cheeks. Molly seemed to be just as awake as he was, not starting at the touch but melting into it and carefully wrapping his tail around Caleb’s waist. A silent thank you.

Caleb had been around Molly enough to know that in moments like this, he liked grounding things. A firm hand around his middle, holding him close. Heavy base playing in headphones. The little lemon candies. For now, unwilling to move, he mumbled in his deep voice in Zemnian near Molly’s ear, explaining more about the mansion, little things he said in his mother tongue to keep secret. How whenever he pictured the stained glass windows he could think of no other patterns than the ones on Molly’s favorite coat. How he would make sure to go somewhere he could memorize the gaudiest tapestries he could find so he could replicate them with more sparkle and brighter colors in Molly’s room.

Soft rumblings with his thickly accented Zemnian slowly lowered Molly’s racing heartbeat and slowed his breathing. Caleb told him how he would take a look at Nott’s latest collection of shiny trinkets to find ones he might like. How he was hoping to make the bedspread look just like the scarf he’d bought for the tiefling before they’d left for the Empire. It was a rich dark indigo, almost purple, and enchanted to look like the night sky, complete with real constellations and planets that would shine and twinkle with real light. How Caleb had seen it and could think of nothing but how the deep blue would look against lavender skin, or wrapped around deep purple hair. How he thought it would bring out the colors in the peacock that wound around Molly’s neck.

How he had no idea when to give him the scarf anyways since he knew Molly would wear it and people would ask questions Caleb didn’t know the answers to.

How the nebulous thing between them was back and thriving. How much Caleb loved it and never wanted it to stop. How terrified he was that it would disappear again, slip through his fingers like all the good things he managed to grab onto.

How he was so happy that his family, the Mighty Nein, hadn’t yet left him behind.

The next thing he knew, the dome was falling and Frumpkin was pushing up against his back, begging for attention now that the cat no longer needed to keep watch. It was 6:07 in the morning. Caleb attempted to sit up with a groan, seeing the sunlight peeking through the trees and illuminating the purple arm keeping him pinned to the ground. Molly had turned around at some point during the night, tangling them together despite being in two different sleeping bags.

It seemed everyone was still dozing, Yasha and Fjord taking the last watch and just chatting quietly near the dying coals of the fire. With the telltale sounds of Jester and Nott clearly still snoring, Caleb felt bold enough to brush the hair out of Mollymauk’s face and trace his fingertips lightly over the tattoos on his cheek. He wouldn’t move just yet. Not when Molly had such trouble sleeping. Instead he had Frumpkin settle himself in between them, purring up a storm.

The hard ground was unforgiving against his back and the sleeping bag was slightly constricting, but Caleb closed his eyes and took in the sensations around him until he had to get up. Frumpkin’s purring rumbled through his chest and Molly’s arm was a warm, grounding weight over his waist. It was relaxing enough for him to take a moment to follow the rise and fall of his breathing, just letting every small feeling in. The sunlight peeking through the leaves and warming his face. The gentle push of air over his shoulder from Molly, still sound asleep beside him. The sounds of his friends snoring, of Yasha sharpening her sword, of the last few embers of his fire crackling as they went out.

Eventually he had Frumpkin nuzzle up under Molly’s cheek, since he couldn’t do so himself.

It would have to do.

Molly’s face scrunched up and Caleb was grateful for his perfect memory, taking in the far too cute wrinkling of his nose and brow as he resisted being woken up.

It was too early to speak common, and Molly probably wouldn’t understand him very well anyways, so Caleb just said, “Guten Morgen.”

“G’morning.” Molly drew back his arm to scrub at his eyes, and Caleb tried not to miss the warmth too much. Just the warmth. He didn’t even allow himself to think about the casual intimacy he shared with the tiefling, how fragile and breakable it seemed. 

There would be time to worry about that later, when they weren’t traveling through the jungle that probably had all sorts of beasts and monsters lurking in the shadows and treating them like prey.

The camp was quickly packed up and the Mighty Nein began to head out early, trying to make it to the Cave of Remembrance by the end of the day. But after a few hours of travel, it was clear that there was no possibility of finishing their journey today. Thick vines blocked their path at every turn, and Yasha was getting exhausted slashing through them. Fjord offered to take over for a while, but they were going much slower than Caleb hoped. They would have to make camp again before nightfall and hope they could make better headway tomorrow.

Things were fine, but slow and annoying, at least for a while.

Fjord was doing a pretty good job clearing the vines, until one sprayed caustic blood and turned to hiss at him.

“Not a vine!” he yelped, slashing at it again. It was bigger than it looked, Fjord having only gotten a few swipes at its tail.

It whipped around and let out a loud hiss, sending all the bushes around them into frantic rustling. Caleb looked around at the undergrowth and identified the sounds easily enough. They were surrounded.

Caleb swallowed, gathering up his bat guano and sulfur in his fingers while Molly pulled out his scimitar and made it flash with radiant light. The extra light helped Caleb see a few of them in the brush, sending out a fireball and downing a couple. It wasn't enough though, as the rest began to attack and everything descended into chaos.

The following hiss was deeper, more like a roar, and started a sheen of cold sweat over Caleb’s brow. The group stumbled back into a clearing, with a snake so thick around the middle that even Yasha probably couldn’t put her arms around it, and just as tall, slithering in after them.

“Fuck,” Molly said, wide eyed and staring up at the thing.

Caleb would have seconded the notion if he could find his voice. As it was he could barely cough out the arcane words to slow down the huge beast and a few of the smaller snakes now surrounding them. Now he just had to not get hit.

But that was easier said than done, as the snakes seemed to know he’d done something to them, training on him and taking bites across his chest that stung with venom. He hissed, the spell wavering but staying strong for now.

The big snake was still moving straight for him, eyes locked on his panicked ones. Caleb looked to his friends, most of them busy fighting the smaller snakes, and Nott caught his eye, winking at him.

He and Nott hadn’t done a con in a long time. It made sense to do Modern Literature when there were a lot of snakes that would probably just assume he was dead no matter how good of an actor he was. So when Nott screamed, “MODERN LITERATURE!” and shot him in the side, he wasn’t completely blindsided. Even if the arrow hitting his journal felt like a punch to the ribs. He knew to crumple and “die.”

But Caleb kind of forgot that no one else knew any of their cons and schemes.

While he was able to focus on keeping the spell slowing down the massive venomous python and some of his friends, Nott was able to blend in with the other evil looking green things and jungle flora, taking them out slowly from their own ranks.

Caleb never thought he’d be so convincing that Jester would believe him. It was nice when she healed the large gash in his side from the earlier snakebite, but he didn’t want to get up and get attacked again.

“It didn’t work!” she whimpered, almost breaking him on the spot, but he didn’t want to die in any real sense. She had to know he wasn’t bleeding out or anything; she was good with medical stuff. So he stayed still, really not expecting to get dragged from his spot by the upset tiefling, dirt and twigs scratching across his face. At this rate he was going to look exactly as he did five years ago.

He could still feel the venom from the snakes coursing through his veins, slowing him down. Anything where he needed proper aim was no longer an option. He would go for casting Sleep, trying to get everyone some more time. It wouldn’t break his focus on the big snake either. If that thing bit anyone else, they were quickly going to be screwed. He sat up a bit, pulling out his vial full of sand and casting the spell.

Jester gasped, “You’re alive! How did you-”

“Sorry, sorry. Thank you for the healing though,” he mumbled, backing away from the fray and stuffing the vial of sand back in his pocket.

Managing to knock down three of the smaller snakes with his sleep spell, the group could focus more of their energy on the huge one. Even slowed, it was taking chunks out of their melee fighters and Caleb was running low on spells that dealt damage already, especially ones that he could cast while focusing on another spell.

One of the snakes snuck up on him, biting him around the ankle and shaking his concentration. He swore as he set the damned thing on fire, but by the time he looked back it was too late. The massive python was taking out all its anger on Molly.

Caleb could see Molly falling across the battlefield, too far away to get to in a reasonable amount of time. He had to tell himself it would be okay. He could see Caduceus nearby.

It had to be okay.

It had to be okay and Molly would remember everything and it would be fine.

Everything would be fine and he would light these goddamn snakes on fire and burn them to a crisp and everyone would be okay.

It was time to break out something new he’d been working on. He could think of no better time, sinking his hands into the ground with his cat’s cradle and sending rivulets of fire to explode on the snake and four of its friends. The small ones crumbled to ash, but the big one was still standing. His hands trembled slightly, and he told himself it was exertion from trying the new spell, not fear, not anxiety. Nothing to worry about when everything was fine.

Everything was fine even though all he could smell was ash and smoke and burning flesh.

Everything was fine even though Molly had gone down.

He chanced a glance over to Mollymauk, knowing it would be dumb to run over with his last potion when Caduceus was right there, but he would if he had to. He would if Molly was still down. He might even if Molly looked a little wobbly on his feet. But Caduceus was already helping him up, both grinning their broad easy smiles as the firbolg patted him on the back. He still felt a cold sliver of fear, but everything was soothed when Molly made eye contact with Caleb and moved to use his sword, teleporting across the battlefield to Caleb’s side.

Beau took advantage of the snake darting after Molly, getting in a few good punches and sending it reeling. Yasha joined her, and Caleb chewed his lip, still shaking ever so slightly with anger. There was one other way that spell worked, and if there was anything he wanted to try it out on, it was the snake that made him feel this uncertainty, this fear.

He sent the web of fire spiraling out again, letting it all crash into the massive python and taking great pleasure in the pained hiss that rang out across the battlefield as it slammed into the ground.

“Damn. That’s… still crazy,” Molly mumbled, having turned around to cast a spell, blindness or something, presumably, and now watching the burning carcass of the snake.

“Aww, Caleb, why’d you have to burn it! I wanted snakeskin boots!” Jester pouted, kicking the corpse dejectedly.

Beau snorted, “Really, Jester? Snakeskin?”

“Not for me, for Fjord!” she grinned.

While Fjord tried to explain that he really didn’t want snakeskin boots, Molly very carefully moved in front of Caleb. He cocked his head at the tiefling, questioning the movement. “Do you need Jester?” he eventually asked, pointing at the crossbow bolt still sticking out of his book.

“Oh, ah, nein. I am fine.” Caleb said, struggling to pry it out until Molly took it for him.

“You know you scared the shit out of us, right?” he asked, staring right at him. “It took me a moment to realize Nott would never actually shoot you.”

Caleb blinked, “I assumed you wouldn’t believe the, um, well the performance.”

“You’re pretty convincing at going down, Caleb,” Molly murmured, pocketing the bolt and grabbing his hand. “No more fake dying, okay? Not unless you let me in on the joke.”

He nodded, squeezing his hand gently before pulling it back and stuffing both into his pockets. The others weren’t watching, but he still felt _off_ after the poison and seeing Molly go down. The venom felt like it was beginning to fade, but he still couldn’t be rid of the sickening feeling he felt when he saw the blood on Molly’s shirt.

“I promise, so long as you promise not to go down either. Fake or real, ja?”

Molly’s face softened and he squeezed his shoulder quickly. “Cross my heart.”


	50. Stone and Clay

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> those are some creepy fucking statues... right?

### Chapter 50: Stone and Clay

Molly could see statues.

Eerie, broken statues all depicted like the artist was trying to comprehend the last few moments of terror before death.

He wasn’t exactly a fan.

His opinion wasn’t exactly helped by the fact that there had been a distinct lack of hot springs the next time they had set up camp and how the humidity was only getting worse. He felt like he was more sweat than tiefling, and all he wanted to do was get inside this cave up ahead and away from the statues. Molly didn’t have anything against the Wildmother, but these were fucking creepy. And rather distracting.

Molly didn’t even see the creature before Caleb whipped around, eyes wide, and casting some spell. The beast started moving in what seemed like slow motion, charging towards them, then brushed off Caleb’s magic like it was nothing and barreled forth, full speed. Molly’d never seen anything like it, but if he had to guess what the big metal bull meant, it wasn’t good.

Drawing his scimitar, he looked around at his friends. Caduceus had placed himself protectively in front of two of the statues. Two of the statues that looked like scared firbolgs. That couldn’t be good.

Honestly _none_ of this looked good.

Molly lit up his sword with radiant energy, hoping to get in a few good swipes as he moved towards it.

Jester and Fjord were hurling spells at it too, making it light up and glow. That drew Molly’s attention to the green smoke pouring out of its nostrils, pooling at its feet like a crummy fog machine. Before they could do anything it had slammed straight into Nott, knocking her over and starting to trample her into the ground.

Molly didn’t have to look at Caleb to see the anguish and frustration on Caleb’s face watching this beast brush off his spells and go straight for his best friend. So Molly ran up with Beau and Yasha, hacking at it with his scimitars and trying desperately to carve into some of the chinks in its armor. Hissing as some horrible liquid splashed out of the creature’s blood, Molly was once again covered in some disgusting poison. As a last ditch effort he tried to blind the thing, hoping to confuse it so they could use ranged attacks while it was occupied. But he only felt the thing shrug off his magic too, just like Caleb’s.

But Caleb had changed plans, beginning to cast the spell that had destroyed the wraith in the graveyard. Molly would recognize the strange spell anywhere. It was when he realized Caleb was more powerful than he’d ever let on. It ate away at the torso of the beast, some of it crumbling away to dust.

It curled up, going on the defensive, and let out a huge puff of green smoke that sent Molly and Beau into a coughing fit. He could feel his limbs seizing up, and he could see Beau’s forearm turn gray like the statues beside him.

 _Not_ good.

Molly’s heart seized up as the thing turned towards Caleb, but even with his limbs like lead, he and Beau managed to knock its feet out from under it, forcing it back. Beau slammed into it, getting in a few more good hits though the cloud of poison was becoming near suffocating. He could see her shrugging off the effects of the gray stone, and he knew he would have to do the same.

There was no way he was living out the rest of his life as a statue, even if he would be a pretty one.

It turned away from them, charging at one of the statues. Molly could see gray dust springing up around the battlefield. He really didn’t want that to be the end of him.

Fjord was getting gored by the horns, but Molly couldn’t do anything as his limbs kept seizing up, slowly taking him over. He could see gray creeping up his body, and Yasha staring down at him in horror. She called something, for Caduceus or Jester, then went off in a rage to gut the damn thing. Molly would have watched with pride if he could turn his head.

But whatever she did seemed to stir up the cloud of poison around him, giving him a breath of fresh air that sent him doubling over, gasping.

The gray started to recede and he was able to rejoin the fray, getting in the last few blows before seeing a statue Beauregard. Not great.

Caleb moved in closer than Molly felt comfortable with, but started screaming cow jokes and making him crack a smile even under the pressure. Then the bull was on fire, toppling over with a wrecked cry.

At some point in the battle, Nott had lifted herself straight up, shooting from above and cursing out the big metal thing. She lowered slowly, looking more dejected than usual after a victory.

“Dumb thing knocked my phone out of my hand, now the screen’s cracked,” Nott mumbled, looking at the fracture in the old smartphone.

Caleb leaned forward and kissed the top of her head. “We’ll get you a new one tomorrow, Schatz. Promise.”

As soon as it fell Caduceus had started tumbling through the sand, reaching out for two of the statues, fumbling for a pocket of some strange glittery substance. The firbolgs gasped back to life, falling into the sand themselves, and Caduceus had his reunion.

Molly felt a pang of envy in his chest before remembering that these people were his family. He didn’t need whoever his family might have been in the past. He didn’t want his past when he had all this now.

Jester was taking care of Beau, and Molly was trying not to think about the broken statues they’d seen on the way here.

Caduceus was standing with one of the firbolgs, looking at a shattered statue. Molly froze, unsure of what to do until Jester started trying to assemble all the missing pieces, Yasha helping. He went as well, laying them out where she instructed and holding them together while she cast a spell over them, slowly working the statue back into one piece. Whoever it was seemed a little rough around the edges, but very much alive when they finally restored her. 

Slowly they reassembled Caduceus’s family, watching the rare stress melt away from the laid back firbolg as he started to tease his siblings. Molly watched as Caleb, Yasha, and Fjord watched with small sad smiles that probably matched his own.

He slung an arm around Caleb’s shoulders and took Yasha’s hand. “Should we find a place to stay inside? I think we’ll probably have the run of the place before they can unfreeze everyone.”

They nodded, willing to accept the offer. They could give the family a moment and go off with their new family. Fjord was pulled into the conversation with Cad’s family, the firbolg beaming as he talked about the new Wildmother paladin. The Clay family practically adopted him on sight, taking some of the melancholy out Molly’s smile. This really was one huge family.

Together they found a large empty room where they could ditch their packs, and scouted out the rest of the place. There were small homes with minimal furniture and a few small luxuries, long since abandoned and covered in dust and cobwebs. It was eerie being in a ghost town, but Caleb and Yasha didn’t seem to mind, finding larger communal spaces like a big kitchen and what must have been a bathhouse.

Molly didn’t even care that the water was cold; he would take advantage as soon as he could. It might even feel nice after the searing heat and sweat of the day.

It was nice watching Caduceus cook with his family, teasing and knocking hips and tripping each other.

When they got back to Nicodranas they’d have to make sure that the group got together a lot. He had been more stressed on this trip than he’d been in ages, but Molly was still having fun with everyone together. Maybe he’d talk to Jester and set up a movie night. And a ladies brunch. And enough activities that he wouldn’t notice how it would soon just him and Yasha again, when this had felt like a true family.

The Clays were all amazing cooks, and Molly was grateful to be pulled out of his thoughts with a meal served at a real table. Caleb was writing notes about things he wanted in the “magnificent mansion” beside him, making detailed notations about a meal just like this.

Molly leaned back in his chair, thinking about the whole journey.

He still hadn’t told Caleb he loved him.

Even in the hot spring, it hadn’t felt quite right. He wanted the moment to feel soft and tender, but without any danger to their lives.

He didn’t want Caleb to think Molly was saying it just because he thought they might die.

Maybe he could do something special for the wizard once they got back to Nicodranas. Now that spring was here they could have a picnic on the beach. Molly hadn’t taught him the Infernal vocabulary there yet. There was a Zemnian deli that was near the water that Molly had been keeping his eye on for a possible place to take Caleb before they’d gone to the Empire. They could stop there and grab sandwiches and drinks before heading out. Caleb might not want to swim, but Molly wouldn’t really care at all, so long as they could actually have a minute alone with him.

His skin was so pale, it would probably burn.

Hells, even in the past few weeks Caleb’s skin had gotten a bit more tan. Molly wanted to count his freckles again, see if there were more. He was very excited to get back to his apartment, sleep in his soft bed with Caleb wrapped around him without any shame. As much as he had loved spending so much time with the whole found family he’d cobbled together, Molly wanted time with his wizard that wasn’t just stolen kisses during late night watches.

He wanted to go on a real goddamn date and hold Caleb’s hand and not worry about any strange monsters or magic users or geysers of acid. 

He wanted to be somewhere that wasn’t trying to kill him or turn him into a statue at every turn. Even his snake tattoo left a sour taste in his mouth after being nearly eviscerated by some python in the woods. Of course the little snake on his arm that reminded him of the one he was allowed to pet by a patron of _The Fletching and Moondrop Emporium of Curiosities_ was much cuter than that bastard. Barely even had fangs.

Lately Molly was having more of a soft spot for cats than snakes. 

But he wanted to make sure he was still going at Caleb’s pace. He wanted to make sure he double checked what exactly that pace was when they got home so he didn’t make the wizard uncomfortable. The last thing he wanted was to accidentally push him away by trying to get closer, like he had in Rumblecusp, despite how much he wanted to throw caution to the wind and bare his soul.

Molly was full of bullshit, but he felt too strongly about this and the truth was eating him alive, especially out here.

Tomorrow they’d teleport home and Molly would figure out the perfect way to do it. Tomorrow he would steal kisses on Caleb’s cheek whenever he walked past him in the apartment and hold his wizard tight and not let go.

Tonight they would have as much fun as possible in a ghost town, but tomorrow things would go back to normal.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I can't believe I made it to chapter 50!! Thank you all so much for your lovely comments and kudos; they always make my day! (also if anyone wants to yell about the latest episodes feel free to hmu on tumblr @anniethepsychic)


	51. Cave of Remembrance

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sucks to lose 10 whole years of your life! No one else would know how that feels at all, right? That's 10 whole birthdays down the drain!!

### Chapter 51: The Cave of Remembrance 

Caleb was very pleased to have gotten Caduceus reunited with his family. In a selfish way he felt deeply satisfied that he could, at the very least, reunite a man he considered family with his true family. He knew that was a selfish desire for him to have, but it was satisfying to see the firbolg so at ease all the same. Later he would offer to teleport them closer to home. It wasn’t time to point out whether or not Clay would be joining them. He wouldn’t put Caduceus on the spot like that right now. Caleb was sure that the man was thinking about it anyways.

He wasn’t sure what he would do if he suddenly got his family back. Would he return to them? Try to live out the rest of his days as a good son in Blumenthal like he’d had both nightmares and dreams about?

There was a time when he wanted to rip apart the seams of reality and drag his parents back into existence. But the more he thought about it, the more he knew he’d never be able to look them in the eye again. It made no sense to threaten this reality, this timeline, with his own selfish desires to make up for his past mistakes. To take the risk of being a different man, never being able to help Nott become Veth, never being able to help Caduceus find his family today. Never be able to meet Jester or Mollymauk or the rest of the Mighty Nein.

Caleb was a fan of calculated risks, but that just didn’t seem like a good calculation anymore.

So instead he could try and remember Caduceus’s own words, or Pumat’s, and live in the moment tonight. Well, as close to living in the moment as he ever did. He could make notes about his design of a tower; a tower he wouldn’t feel nervous in because it was his own creation. A tower that was its own pocket dimension; that he could create and escape to whenever he needed. Pumat might say that designing the tower during lunch might be too close to living in the future, not the present, but it helped to calm his mind. He could enjoy how the Clays enjoyed cooking with one another, insisting on making lunch and dinner for the Nein as repayment for helping them. They had all insisted it wasn’t necessary, but the family of firbolgs wouldn’t take no for an answer. He could enjoy their well prepared food, finally not cooked over a campfire. He could enjoy Mollymauk’s presence beside him, and Nott on the other side. 

He could enjoy his own small family, all together here tonight. 

Even if Jester was starting to talk about how long the Clay’s had been frozen again.

“I can’t believe you guys have been gone for ten whole years! I can’t imagine losing ten years of my life,” Jester said to Caduceus’s family, tactful as ever.

Caleb shifted uncomfortably in his seat, not looking up from his notebook. He knew the feeling all too well. Around his upper arm he felt a light, grounding pressure. Molly’s tail had wrapped around him, just gently. An acknowledgment of Caleb being uncomfortable.

He smiled at him, trying to reassure the tiefling he was fine. Then he looked back at the notes on the tower, wondering if he could find a way to enlarge the library without memorizing more books while they continued talking.

If he could tweak the spell just a bit, he could make a room that would summon whatever you wanted. That way he wouldn’t have to worry about changing the design every time; he could just have a designated space that could quickly be turned into a movie theater, or a dance floor, or a fighting ring, or whatever other nonsense his friends would surely request of him. He’d do his best to give each of them their own space with things they would likely enjoy while traveling, but they were sure to want confusing things on top of that, things he couldn’t possibly account for without reading their minds. Even if he did have that spell, he wouldn’t want to use it.

“I mean it doesn’t feel like we missed ten years,” Calliope shrugged, taking a bite out of a small roll of bread.

Jester shook her head, leaning forward over the table, “Still! You missed so much! Like, you all missed ten birthdays!”

Molly shrugged, “I don’t have a birthday. Not that weird.”

Caleb frowned at that. Surely Molly would have picked a day to celebrate his birth if he’d wanted to in the past, but the most obvious date would be when Yasha found him. Which both made him seem more like a dog than a person, and probably had escaped both their memories at this point. It likely wasn’t something Yasha or Caduceus would have worried about, or realized might be important to Molly.

He remembered a time, many years ago, before Nott was willing to tell him she’d been a halfling and had lied a lot about her life with the goblin tribe. After learning she’d supposedly never had a birthday, he told her that day was her birthday and they celebrated. They hadn’t had much for presents, but he nicked her something shiny from a nearby store and they scrapped their coins together to buy and split a cupcake. It had been quite nice.

“Today. The third of Dualahei. We’ll make today your birthday,” Caleb said on a whim, hoping that Molly would be excited.

The light in Molly’s expression was very very welcome. A shocked smile crossed his face and Caleb was grateful for his perfect memory as he took in every line of the surprised grin that had taken root. He desperately wanted to kiss him, right then and there. Or at the very least to drag him off into some dark corner so he could kiss him in private. Instead his thoughts were interrupted by Jester.

“But wait, we don’t have a cake! Or presents!” Jester pouted, looking more upset about that than anyone, including Molly.

Caleb bit his lip, thinking. “We have candles, we can sing, and we can have a proper party when we get back. You could throw one, perhaps?”

That mollified her, sending her out of her chair to hug Molly tightly. “Oh, Molly, I will throw you the best party ever! It’ll be like five awesome birthday parties in one since you missed so many!” Caleb could only smile as the two tieflings started talking.

Molly looked ecstatic, willing to let Jester dote on him in every possible way. They were talking about how many tiers they should get in a cake, and how it might not be able to fit in the freezer at _Divine Delights_ but it would work out. When they started talking about costumes, Caleb closed his journal and took his leave for a moment. He wasn’t as good a party planner as Jester, but he could at least try to make Molly’s chosen birthday a good evening. It took a moment to slip out of the grip of Molly’s tail without startling him, but he managed, slinking off to find Caduceus.

He walked over to Caduceus after lunch, asking if they could make anything sweet with the supplies they had acquired in Draconia. The cupcakes in Jester’s bag were getting quite stale, so he wanted to avoid that if possible. No matter what kind of cake Jester was able to make when they got back home, this one should at least be edible. For it being a first birthday and all.

Caduceus nodded pensively, passing the pile of plates in his arms to his mother and taking a moment to rewrap Caleb’s bandages with a fresh helping of healing cream to help the scarring. “I think there’s still some flour and sugar left over from what we bought. It might not be spectacular, but I’ll see what I can do.”

Caleb assured him that it would be more than enough, thanking him kindly.

He then snuck over to Yasha, able to have an entire quiet conversation with her beside Molly and Jester without either tiefling hearing a word. They decided that she would get some flower arrangements set up for the evening, with Beau and Calliope offering to grab whatever they could find as vases. None of them were exactly stealthy, other than Beau (on a good day), but Molly was too distracted to notice them all slip out of the cave.

Nott was next.

“Hallo, Schatz,” he said, ruffling her hair before sitting beside her where she’d curled up on the floor with her flask, just watching everyone and taking a break. They hadn’t really had a moment alone since before they started out to the Empire. “How are you holding up?”

She rolled her eyes at the mussed up hair, smoothing it again, though it was always a bit wild with humidity. The jungle had it completely untamed, especially since she hadn’t brought enough dry shampoo for the journey. “I’m alright. You still need to take better care of yourself. I still need you to try the spell again.”

“Yussa could have done it for you,” Caleb sighed, absentmindedly running his fingers over the strange bandages around his throat. They were unnecessary in his opinion at this point; he didn’t mind another scar. But the way Molly and Nott looked at the silvery line across his neck made him want to get it to fade away as much as possible.

He didn’t need to cause them pain just by bringing up the memory.

Nott frowned darkly at him. “I don’t _want_ Yussa to do it; I want _you_ to do it. You devoted yourself to me; and I want you to be the one to do it.”

“Ja, ja, I know.” He sighed softly, pulling Frumpkin off his shoulders so he could pet the cat in his lap instead of making eye contact. “I’ve been trying to stay out of the way. You all seem quite keen on keeping me alive.”

Nott nodded, leaning lightly on his arm and rubbing Frumpkin once or twice under the chin. “I might be okay with you dating Molly now. Maybe.”

“Only took him saving my life to win you over?” Caleb snorted, resisting the urge to mess up her hair again.

“I said, ‘maybe.’ Don’t push it,” she grumbled. “You’re still my boy and he’s still… loud.”

“Maybe.”

She sighed deeply, just scritching Frumpkin under the chin in the spot she knew made him purr like a motorboat. “But I am glad that he woke up before I did back in the swamp. And maybe he’s loud and you’re quiet and you suit each other. Maybe. And maybe I like seeing you this happy, even if he is kind of an asshole.”

Caleb couldn’t help himself from pulling her into a quick hug, being gentle since she was still a bit bruised from the gorgon. _“Maybe_ you should find something shiny in your bag for him as a birthday present. So you don’t have to actually tell him.”

“You’re _using_ me to get _my_ shiny trinkets for your _boyfriend.”_ Nott pulled back, mock horror painting her face but nothing could stop her grin.

He rolled his eyes. “I’m giving you a wonderful out for having a conversation with someone you find to be… abrasive.” 

She laughed, starting to pick through strange things in her pack. “You’re lucky I love you. Even if you have strange, _abrasive_ taste.”

Caleb smiled softly, watching Frumpkin crawl into Nott’s lap and cuddle into her neck. “Can I admit something to you?”

Nott blinked, “Sure, go ahead.”

He blinked back tears pricking at the corners of his eyes. “It is a blessing to have family again.”


	52. Chaos Crew!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some well deserved fluff!!

### Chapter 52: Chaos Crew! 

Caleb had given him a goddamn birthday.

After years of ignoring the pangs of envy he felt whenever someone had a birthday party, and pretending he didn’t care about his past enough to pick a day when he was “born,” Caleb had solved the problem in under two minutes. No pity, no questions, nothing.

He really was a genius.

Molly wanted nothing more than to sit down and thank him, but by the time Jester had calmed a bit and they’d planned half of an intricate gala together, Caleb was gone. It only took a second for him to place his wizard, resting against the wall with Nott. He only caught snippets of the conversation, but it made him smile nonetheless.

“It’s a blessing to have family again.”

He grinned and turned back to Jester, in lighter spirits than he’d been in days.

“Molly, we should totally go play pranks on the town before everyone wakes up. You know, like, for your birthday!” Jester said, beaming at him. “Like… we could put buckets of water on the doorways so they get wet when they walk in!”

“And give them all concussions, great.” Beau snorted.

Fjord snorted, saying sarcastically, “Yeah, why don’t you make a stone dick on one of the statues? They wake up, and they've just got one sticking out of their shoulder.”

“Oh! I could paint, like, a penis on the shoulder or something and then when they're brought back to life,” Jester beamed and wiggled her finger near her shoulder in a way that looked nothing like a dick, taking Fjord completely seriously.

Caduceus said over his shoulder, still collecting dishes, “Let's maybe not do that. Now that you can’t do it to Colton.”

Jester pouted but nodded. 

Molly saw Caleb talking about the various entrances to the cave with the leader of the place, deciding on casting an alarm spell instead of his usual dome. He could see Nott and Caleb still talking, and for the first time in a few days, Nott seemed to completely relax. The effect on Caleb was immediate, both of them looking completely adorable curled up around Frumpkin and talking softly.

Molly smiled to himself, looking back at Jester and Fjord as they bickered about what would be an acceptable prank to pull on the petrified people. Nott eventually joined them, excited to be a part of what had been deemed “the chaos crew.” With Fjord and Yasha as tagalongs, but they weren’t going to be able to supervise _everything._ Still, they approved of giving everyone a pinecone to hold so they woke up completely confused. It was going to be a very fun evening.

And Molly was having plenty of fun, until Jester asked, “So have you guys, like, boned yet?”

Molly almost choked on nothing, eyes wide. “Fucking hells, Jester,” he mumbled after his coughing fit.

“Is that a yes?” she asked, wiggling her eyebrows a bit too much. “You’re definitely blushing!”

He rolled his eyes, grabbing another pinecone. “No. And I’m sure he wouldn’t appreciate you asking.”

“I didn’t ask Caleb, I asked you.” Jester rolled her eyes right back and threw another pinecone in their tote bag that was printed with the logo from her favorite makeup store. 

Molly could have groaned, glad Nott had scaled a tree to gather the pinecones and was out of earshot. Even when one dropped directly on his head. “Fuck!”

“Sorry!” Nott called down, her gleeful tone of voice indicating the exact opposite of regret.

Jester giggled, smoothing out Molly’s hair. “But seriously, you should see the way he looks at you when you’re not looking. It’s the kind of thing that would make Beau barf.”

“Yeah?” he asked, heart lurching in his chest just at the thought.

She nodded eagerly. “It’s adorable! I _wish_ someone would look at me like that when I’m not looking.”

“How do you know someone isn't?” Molly asked, winking at her.

Eyes blown wide she dropped the pinecone in her hands. “What? Tell me everything!”

“What can I say? Someone has their eye on a sapphire,” he grinned, more than happy to turn the tables. At least he didn’t have to threaten her to take care of Fjord like she had with Caleb. Fjord would be lucky to live two hours past hurting her, depending on who got to him first.

“You’re going to tell me all about that later, _but_ we’re talking about _you!_ You’re the birthday tiefling anyways, this day should be about you!”

Molly sighed softly, grabbing another pinecone. “Yes, yes, happy birthday, let’s have vaguely uncomfortable conversations in the woods while grabbing pinecones.”

“Well, what _have_ you guys done? If you’re being all chaste and stuff.” Jester grabbed the tote bag and threw it over her shoulder.

He really did groan then, staring at her pointedly for a moment before speaking. “We’ve kissed and we cuddle a lot. I’m not going to rush him; I know he’s dealing with a lot. Not to mention he almost fucking _died_ three days ago.”

“I mean, it was kinda romantic, you saving his life and all,” she said, kicking one of the pinecones. “Like a romance movie.”

Smothering a snort that probably would have just hurt her feelings, Molly tried not to remember the details. It didn’t work. “So romantic. Soaked in blood and unable to scream. _Peak_ romance.”

“You know that’s not what I meant,” she said, scrunching up her nose. “I just mean… I dunno. Like healing him in your arms, and the first thing he saw after he thought he was going to die was your face. Well, maybe not _die_ die. Those scourger people would have probably just revived him so Icky Thong could keep torturing him.” 

Jester suppressed a shiver as Molly stopped in his tracks. “What?” he asked, mouth going dry.

“I mean, I can do it. Bring someone back, after like a little bit. Caduceus too. It’s harder the more time goes by, but I’m sure Icky Thong has plenty of clerics he could ask favors for-”

“He’s not just trying to kill him?” he choked out.

She shifted uncomfortably. “I mean, he doesn’t seem like the type to not want to kill Caleb himself. Or just keep him. Caleb’s told me he used to keep a grudge. And Caleb’s been able to avoid him for nine whole years. And he started working with Yussa instead. I’m sure he’s pissed; I don’t think he’d just let him die- Hey, Nott! How many pinecones did you get?”

Molly tried to shove down the feelings of horror and revulsion. Beau had been able to get a hold of a contact from her shady days to look into the underground trade of residuum, but it had been a dead end. The Cerberus Assembly was acquiring all the whitestone through legal channels, Ikithon was just performing illegal experiments with it once it got within the walls of the tower. She was trying to talk with her connections at the Cobalt Soul, but she hadn’t looked hopeful.

But Jester just took his hand, whispering soft, “I’m sorry. I’m sure it’s okay now. They can’t find us here anyways, right? He burned all that stuff, and tomorrow we’ll be back home!”

He nodded, a little stiffly, but managed to plaster a smile on his face. “Yeah.”

“Now, what do you want for a present!” she asked, filling the rest of the walk back with mindless birthday chatter and helping him bury those thoughts. As much as he wanted to say he wanted for his birthday he wanted to run Ikithon through with a pike, he could talk about makeup for now and bide his time.

When they got back, Caleb was still up, hunched over a spellbook in the room they’d eaten lunch. Molly made a mental note about booking them massages back in Nicodranas. Maybe he could pass it off as a birthday thing, get someone sent to the apartment so Caleb wouldn’t be uncomfortable. Or maybe he could just watch a few videos and try to get better himself.

Thinking about the excuse to get Caleb relaxed and possibly shirtless with just his hands made that the obvious choice, and chased away the last of his unpleasant thoughts from earlier.

“Welcome back. Are the residents going to be scarred for life?” Caleb asked, a soft gleam in his eye.

It was rare that he would notice Molly at all while he was working like that. Must be a birthday thing. Molly could definitely get used to it, grinning and sitting beside him as the others all disappeared. “I mean, not because of us. We should definitely hook them up with a good therapist though, for missing ten years of their lives.”

“Ah, ja. It’s not fun,” Caleb said, voice a bit too sad. 

Shit. Molly could have smacked himself. Ten years petrified was probably nothing compared to eleven years in an asylum run by Empire lunatics. “I mean, I didn’t-”

“It’s okay. I know what you meant. And to be perfectly honest, yes. They should probably all get in touch with a therapist. I’ll mention it to Caduceus before we go.” Caleb’s smile was a bit too melancholy, but it would have to do. Molly’s tail found its way around Caleb’s wrist, trying to be reassuring. “But,” Caleb went on, “today is about you. Happy birthday.”

The wizard pulled out a small package, just wrapped in brown paper, but wrapped all the same, and dusted with glitter. Probably from Jester, if Molly had to guess. His eyes widened. “Did you plan this? I thought you were being spontaneous earlier…”

“I mean, I planned to give you a gift, but never found the right time. So I made the right time.” Caleb shrugged. “The charm is from Nott. She doesn’t want to talk about it but she told me to tell you that she’s forty three percent less likely to kill you now. I don’t know exactly how to tell her I’d rather you not die in a way that would sink in.”

Molly laughed, grabbing the package and inspecting the charm clipped to the small ribbon that looked like it came straight off Jester’s head. The charm was a little crescent moon, about as long as his thumbnail, with a small gemstone hanging in the curve off a small chain. The white gemstone caught the light, shining with a silvery blue hue. “It’s a moonstone. She said it went with what I got,” Caleb said.

“It’s beautiful,” Molly hummed, half in love with it already. “Would you clip it to the chain here?” He pointed to one of the chains on his horns, handing it to Caleb.

The redhead moved closer, fumbling a bit but managing to attach the small charm to the little silver chain hanging from one end of his horns to the other. Molly couldn’t help but to reach out, run a thumb over Caleb’s cheek and watch the blush creep up under his fingers. “Thank you. For all of this.”

Caleb cleared his throat, sitting back and pushing the package forward again. “You haven’t even opened my part yet.”

“Whatever it is, this is already like the nicest thing anyone has ever done for me,” Molly said, catching the wizard’s hand as he passed it over and rubbing over the knuckles a moment before ripping it open.

The deeply pigmented fabric was silky smooth under his hands and the rhinestones or whatever it was that sparkled seemed to glow.

He unfolded the scarf and felt like he was holding the inky blue night sky in his palms. Speechless, he let the cloth drip through his hands like liquid silk, wondering how on Earth it managed to shine like that.

“Oh, wait, it’s better like this,” Caleb said, waving a hand and lowering all the lanterns in the room to a dull glow, leaving them in the dark. “I’m not sure if it still looks as nice with darkvision, or better, but I thought you’d like it. Once we go back to Nicodranas it’s hard to see all the stars, so now you can have them all the time. It’s enchanted to always show you the sky that’s above us. The man at the store said if you ever took it up north it would show the Northern Lights, but I couldn’t exactly test it.”

“It’s perfect the way it is,” Molly murmured, tracing his finger over Ursa Major with a growing smile. This was different from the other gifts Caleb had given him. Sure, Molly had tucked the ticket stubs from the circus into his mirror at home, and hung the badge from the Renaissance Fair around his bedpost, but this was something Caleb had picked out for him. Something he could wear around, like how cute Caleb looked wearing Molly’s sweatpants.

He wrapped it around his neck, winding it around once and letting it hang so he would be able to worry at the edges when he needed something to fidget with. His tail ran over the seam, reveling in the silky material again as he was unable to keep the grin off his face.

Caleb moved to adjust it slightly, staring down at the fabric but getting much closer. A steady blush was growing on his cheeks. “I thought it would be a, um, good color. For you.”

“Did you now?” Molly asked, the grin turning into more of a smirk.

He nodded, eyes darting up again and meeting Molly’s in the dark, still only inches away. “It’s a simple enchantment, but,” he swallowed, “you’re glowing.”

Molly couldn’t see himself, but he could imagine pretty well since Caleb’s eyes were lit up with reflected starlight, faintly glowing, as if the magic inside him had finally become a visible, tangible thing. A tangible thing that had a force of its own, a gravitational pull.

He looked down at Caleb’s lips just as the man licked them and he almost combusted on the spot. Molly licked his own, slowly, staring at Caleb in a clear question. All he needed was the slightest nod to close the gap and press against his wizard, pulling away from the kiss just a hair to whisper, “Thank you.”

Feeling the returning smirk more than seeing it, Caleb pulled him closer again, hand winding in his hair. It was intoxicating. Molly was half ready to say he loved him right in that moment, but neither would pull away, even to breathe.

_“Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you-”_

Caleb pulled back, cheeks lighting up a deep crimson as their friends started singing down the hallway towards them. “Sheiße.”

“Tell them to go away,” Molly mumbled, pressing his forehead to Caleb’s for a moment. 

Caleb’s smile came back as he kissed Molly’s nose and shook his head. “Later.”

“Promise?” he asked with a quirked brow.

“Promise.”

_“Happy birthday, dear Molly, happy birthday to you!”_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [Addie_Lover_of_Stories](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Addie_Lover_of_Stories/pseuds/Addie_Lover_of_Stories) made [fanart](https://addie-lover-of-stories.tumblr.com/post/639564314494320640/hey-calebneedsahug-that-last-chapter-murdered) of this chapter, and it's completely adorable!!


	53. I Can Fix This

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> some fluff, and some angst! don't want too much of a good thing ;)

### Chapter 53: I Can Fix This

_“Happy birthday, dear Molly, happy birthday to you!”_

Jester and Caduceus were carrying the cake that was covered in tea lights instead of birthday candles. Somehow they had managed to make a two tiered cake that would feed all of them, and Caleb strongly suspected Jester had found a way to color the frosting purple despite the impossible odds. Everyone else was holding huge vases of tropical flowers, arranged by Yasha and held in everything from tin cans to tea pots. The singing was off key and enthusiastic, but Caleb didn’t trust his voice not to crack enough to join them.

Caleb pulled further away from the tiefling who had kissed him not seconds before, willing the blood in his cheeks to calm. Hopefully everyone would be looking at Molly.

Why wouldn’t they?

Caleb had definitely been right about the color of the scarf looking beautiful against his skin. The deep purplish-blue was perfect and the shining stars really did make him glow. He was completely stunning. They would be fools not to. But of course all of his friends were complete idiots. Nott sent Caleb a knowing look, Caduceus and Beau were observing him carefully, and Jester straight up winked at him. Yasha, thankfully, was completely focused on Molly. Fjord seemed to not be able to read the room at all.

It was bound to happen anyway. His friends, his newfound family, they were too perceptive not to. Well, maybe not Fjord. He was smart enough to put all the pieces together eventually, but it might take him a while. Yasha knew Caleb and Molly both too well. Not to mention she’d seen them sharing a bed for the past few weeks before the trip to the Empire. Caleb wasn’t sure if anyone would actually ask him about it now that he and Nott had cleared the air, other than when Jester finally snapped. It was inevitable; she would have questions that would make him blush.

He could manage the embarrassment. It would be worth it, wouldn't it?

"Make a wish!" Jester said to Molly, grinning wide and illuminated in candlelight.

Molly's tail wrapped around Caleb’s wrist as if to answer the unasked question when he blew out the candles, leaving them in darkness. "Wish made."

It would be worth every second.

Between Caduceus’s baking skills, and Nott and Jester working at a bakery for months, the cake was almost professional looking. How in the hells Jester managed to make a piping bag in the middle of nowhere Caleb would never know. But between that and Yasha’s stash of edible flowers, it was beautiful and delicious.

Caduceus gave Molly some of his special blends of tea, and Yasha gave him a delicate flower crown made of violets. The others promised to get him something when Jester threw “the best birthday party since the Founding of Exandria.” 

The leader of the Stones had given them pretty much free reign over the area while he attempted to contact people to help with the process of getting everyone unpetrified. The homes (some covered in pinecones) scattered throughout the cave were open to the Nein for the night and throughout the evening people slowly started peeling off from the group to set up in the small abodes. Caduceus and his family were first, leaving to discuss everything about the Blooming Grove and the uncertain future.

Yasha and Beau disappeared not long after, probably excited to be somewhere that had doors instead of just tent flaps. Jester and Nott invited Molly to come with them and paint their nails in a kind of birthday girls’ night, but he declined. “I’m going to find somewhere to take a shower. Even if it’s cold, I just want to wash all the jungle grime off.”

“I saw a shower where I put our camping gear,” Caleb said, more than happy to be alone with Molly for a moment, especially after the long day.

Molly’s brow raised, a light smirk across his face. “Lead the way then, Mr. Caleb.”

Ignoring Jester wiggling her eyebrows up and down dramatically, Caleb closed up the notebook he’d been writing in and said his good nights to the women who were both too interested in his lovelife for different reasons. Molly followed him out, waiting a moment before speaking.

“Think they have a working water heater?” he asked from behind Caleb, the tail wrapping around his wrist once again.

Caleb shrugged. “Unless it’s enchanted or solar powered, I doubt they’ve been getting gas regularly over the past few decades. I can’t heat up a shower, but if you really wanted hot water I could probably warm enough for a bath.”

“Like the hot spring?” Molly asked, perking up a bit.

He almost stopped in his tracks, a blush coming to his cheeks once again at the thought of bathing together without all their friends. “I mean, I’m not sure how big the bathtub is.”

It wasn’t that different. Not really. Just no bubbles. And no friends.

“Oh, I didn’t mean- I mean if you wanted to-” Molly sounded flustered, the tail around Caleb’s wrist squeezing gently. “I could rub your shoulders again if you wanted?” he eventually said, looking worried that he’d pushed too far.

Caleb chewed his lip gently, opening up the door to the room. “I suppose… it is later.”

A glint shined in Molly’s eyes as the tiefling’s face bloomed into a broad smile. The tiefling was quick, and before Caleb knew it his back was against the wall and Molly’s mouth was pressed against his own. Letting out a soft sound, Caleb’s hands found their way into the soft fabric of the scarf, pulling Molly closer.

Molly answered in kind, pressing flush against him and nipping gently at Caleb’s lower lip. He allowed the tiefling’s tongue to slip inside, trying not to whimper at the sensation sending shivers down his spine.

It was a very strange feeling for Caleb to lose track of time. Disorienting, but in the best possible way.

One minute (9: 37) Molly was somehow kissing him while walking them both into the small bathroom, the next (9:38) he was kissing down Caleb’s neck while the wizard perched in his lap on the edge of the tub, two minutes (9:40) later and Molly had given him a hickey (making him lose concentration on his fire spell at least three times) while he heated up the water.

Then he vaguely became aware of time again an hour later (10:47) as they finally broke apart to curl up on their sleeping bags, each zipped flat with Caleb’s on bottom and Molly’s on top like a blanket.

It was very, very nice.

He wasn’t surprised that Mollymauk could make him lose track of everything just by making out. The bastard was far too talented with his tongue, though just the thought made his cheeks pink. Caleb hadn’t lost track of time like this since he’d been in the Sanatorium. And that was nothing in comparison to this. This was nothing like being a horny teenager with Astrid. This was bliss. Wrapped around his purple tiefling, he was completely smitten. Caleb curled against his chest, relishing in the feeling of Molly pulling him closer and kissing him on the temple as he ran deft fingers through his hair. If he was a cat, he would have purred, the sensation lulling him to sleep.

“Did you have a good birthday?” he murmured, fighting his closing eyelids at 10:58.

“The best,” Molly said against his temple, keeping his fingers running through Caleb’s hair until he fell fast asleep.

As they gathered their things that morning, Jester and Caduceus used the last of their diamond dust to get as many of the other petrified patrons of the Wildmother back up and running. Caleb made sure everyone was ready, then went outside to get to a surface good enough to draw his teleportation circle on. It would be fantastic when he got stronger and could cast the new teleportation spell he’d found in the scourgers’ spellbooks.

They had to walk quite a ways to find some decent stone for him to begin the teleportation circle, everyone buzzing with excitement as they prepared to go home. But he’d been here already, knowing exactly where the stone surface was since he was able to send the Clay’s home early that same morning. Once they’d fixed up all the statue’s pieces with mending and special glue, they’d gotten the whole family up and around. The firbolgs were grateful, but understandably a bit homesick, even with the family being reunited. After a well needed rest, Caleb was ready to teleport them closeby.

Clay had given them all hugs, telling them to send him a message if they ever wanted to come to see him in Nicodranas, but he still felt like he needed to be out on his own. It appeared they had everything they needed to save the Blooming Grove, and the Mighty Nein could probably convince Reani to take them there if they wanted to visit someday. Hells, Caleb could probably manage it soon with the teleportation spell. He was very pleased with those Volstrucker's spellbooks, and he was sure Yussa would be too.

Caleb was more than happy to help the Clay family get home, especially since he’d destroyed his own. This was the least he could do. 

And he hadn’t exactly sent them home, but to Rexxentrum. Caleb was a bit worried about sending them to the teleportation circle he still had memorized in the city. There was no way he would send them to the Soltryce Academy or the Cerberus Assembly, but he could probably get away with sending them to the teleportation circle inside King Dwendal’s castle. He remembered the attendant and asked Jester to send him a message after disguising himself to look like the tired elf who worked there. There was little upward movement in the castle, so unless he’d died or gotten a rare promotion, he was probably still working there.

Jester confirmed that he was now expecting them, and he sent the family on their way. They hadn’t asked for a name or an organization when Jester had called him a “mage of the Empire,” which was, in the literal sense, true. The firbolgs knew not to use his name, or appearance, just saying a passing mage did them a favor to send them back home. They all seemed charismatic enough to get away with such a thing. Even Caleb couldn’t see a twitch or tell when they repeated the lies. Or rather, slight omissions of truth.

That had been about five hours from now, when Caleb started the trek back to the spot he had cast the spell. The group was full of a late brunch and eager to get back to Nicodranas, not looking too carefully at their surroundings as they walked to the stone outcropping on the edge of the jungle.

That was near about when everything went to shit. Again.

Caleb hadn’t been expecting there to be such a powerful mage this close to the Cave of Remembrance. He really wasn’t expecting the mage to have spells beyond his level of casting, and be commanding enchanted beasts similarly mutated to the gorgon they’d fought a few days prior. After casting disintegrate and leaving the man with one arm and a decent chunk of his torso crumbling to dust, he moved back. It was bad that there was a magic user out here.

He couldn’t see from where he was hiding, but he was pretty sure he recognized the face of the man as an underclassman from the Soltryce Academy. Even this far away, Caleb never forgot a face. Somewhere along the line, he’d fucked up.

Somehow Ikithon was tracking him.

He tried to swallow the lump developing in his throat and sent out a fireball that the mage dodged away from. Caleb couldn’t even bring himself to make eye contact with any of his friends. His friends who were in danger yet again because of his mistakes. Once this was over, he would teleport to Tal’Dorei, dump everything he’d taken from the Volstrucker, even the spell components, and come back. 

Once this was over he would check in on each of the Clays and make sure that they had been sent home safe and sound, and weren’t being detained because of his actions.

Once this was over he would fix things.

Once his friends were safe and sound and not fighting things because he fucked up yet again, he would find a way to fix everything, no matter what it took.

When he saw the mage meet his eye, almost a hundred feet from the battle, keeping safely away from the fray and taking out the monsters close to him, he wasn’t even close enough to counter the spell hurled at him.

He knew there were only a few spells that had that kind of range. This could only be bad. Caleb would probably have to wait to fix things.

He felt the bloom of pain rack through his head, so much so that he sank to his knees, unconscious before he hit the ground.


	54. Shattered Intellect and Personality

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> can't have fluff without a side of angst, right? right?

### Chapter 54: Shattered Intellect and Personality 

Molly saw Caleb at the far edges of the fray, casting spells and taking out chunks of the beasts they were fighting with careful precision. He was grateful the wizard was keeping his distance from the worst of it, especially since he even seemed out of range of the other mage. Caleb could hurl fireballs at that distance, but that was all Molly had really seen work from that far away.

That other magic user looked at Caleb like he knew him, and that shook Molly to his very core. Molly was worried, but he covered it up with anger, vowing in Infernal to rip the man to shreds on his way to taking down Ikithon in an attempt to blind the mage. His eyes bled but he was still able to get out another spell, gesturing across the battlefield at their wizard.

And then Caleb went down.

Molly's stomach turned over, threatening to spill. Taking the chance of getting hit, he ran from the beast attacking him and started pouring a potion down the unconscious man’s throat. It took him too long to get over there, even running full speed, and the battle surged around him. He was trying desperately to not look at the blood pouring over his hand from where Caleb had hit his head on the way down.

“C’mon, c’mon, not again. We said not again, remember?” he mumbled, brushing the matted hair off Caleb’s face.

The wizard coughed and spluttered in his arms, and Molly felt like he could breathe again. It wasn’t as bad as the last time, as far as Molly could tell. He patted him on the back, and pulled away “C’mon, we’re not done yet.”

There was a deep panic in Caleb’s eyes that he’d never seen before as he moved away from him and the wizard clutched at his coat to keep him close. This was different from the terror of Caleb being afraid after the fire in his apartment or when he woke up from nightmares about the residuum crystals. There was no rational thought behind the look. Tears brimmed on the edges of his eyes, yet he said nothing. The look in Caleb’s eyes was completely heartbreaking. Molly traced the man’s chin with his thumb. “What’s wrong?”

Nothing. Just the look of panic, now mixed with confusion.

Molly faltered, then called out, “The mage charmed Caleb, I think!”

Nott cursed, directing the fire of her crossbow bolts in towards the mage. Looking around at his friends fighting, Molly knew he couldn’t just stay with the wizard, no matter how much his heart ached to leave. He’d be better off protecting him and making sure nothing got too close. Molly leaned down and kissed Caleb’s forehead, “I’ll be right back, I promise. We’ll take care of this.”

They made quick work of the rest, the mage taking a decent chunk of their defenses away, but they would walk away from it all. Once the mage had fallen, Molly looked quickly over at Caleb, heart sinking.

He didn’t know much about magic, especially magic beyond the hemocraft he knew intrinsically. But he knew that most spells stopped when the caster died. Like the silence spell. Swallowing the lump in his throat he approached Caleb, currently curled up in a ball on the field, rocking himself back and forth gently. He didn’t even have Frumpkin, who Caleb had snapped away mid battle, worried for the little cat underfoot of all the beasts.

“Caleb? Are you okay?” Molly asked softly, trying to approach slowly and announce himself.

The wizard looked up, confusion and sorrow across his face. The tears from earlier had fallen over his cheeks, and he was shaking like a leaf. He looked down at his hands, then around them.

“Jester?” Molly called out, trying to ignore the raw quality creeping into his voice.

“Yeah, Molly? Do you need healing?” she asked, pulling away from patching up Beau. Yasha was at her side, a grim look on her face. She probably didn’t like seeing Beau hurt any more than Molly felt about Caleb, even if Beau was better equipped to take a hit.

But Molly couldn’t be worried for her right now, even if Caleb didn’t seem _too_ hurt after the healing potion. Not hurt enough to be acting like this. There were some gashes and scrapes, but nothing they hadn’t seen over the past few days. He crouched next to Caleb, offering a hand out to him. Caleb stared at it in confusion until Molly carefully grabbed one of his hands to squeeze reassuringly. “Not me. Caleb’s still… I don’t know.”

Caleb was staring at their hands clasped together, squeezing back. Then he pulled Molly forward into a crushing hug, squeezing the air out of him and crying into his shoulder. Behind him he could hear Beau whispering, “What the fuck?”

Jester made her way over then, sitting beside Caleb. Seeing her made him muster up a small smile, and he went to hug her as well. “Hi, Caleb,” she said into his coat, a tad smothered and rubbing healing magic into his back. “What’s wrong?”

The gashes closed more completely. He said nothing.

Molly’s stomach twisted again as Caleb held her closer, nothing intelligible coming out of his mouth.

Caduceus looked over as well then, finishing up healing Fjord and taking in the situation. Nott was rushing over too, hands and pockets full of whatever the mage had been carrying. Jester pulled away so they could take a look and the sound that came out of Caleb’s mouth was practically a whimper.

He couldn’t take it.

Molly slung an arm over Caleb’s shoulder, seeing the visible relief in tension on the wizard’s face. “Hey, it’s okay. You’re safe. Jester just wants to help, yeah?”

Caleb opened his mouth like he might speak, then closed it again. More tears began to fall.

Caduceus took a look at him, bending over so he could look in the blue eyes that were watery with tears. “Caleb, can you tell us what happened?”

A look of pained confusion crossed his face. His mouth opened and closed once again with nothing more than a whimper. Caduceus stood back at his full height, looking at Jester. “Got any secret stashes of diamond dust?”

“We used the last of it on your family and the Stones…” Jester brushed the hair out of Caleb’s eyes. Molly wondered if he should tie it back for him. She just frowned, asking, “What is this?”

“Looks like a spell called Feeblemind, I think,” Beau piped up. The others turned to her in surprise. “What? I read about it once. Caleb doesn’t have sole rights to all magical knowledge. Especially right now. No offense dude. Well, not that you can take offense right now-” 

Molly wasn’t really looking at the defensive monk. He didn’t really care. The name of the spell told him enough. His mind was starting the slow depressing spiral of wondering how the hell Caleb could cast spells when he couldn’t speak or even seem to understand the rest of the group. “How do we stop it?”

Caduceus said, “I think Greater Restoration should do the trick, but we’re tapped on diamond dust.”

Molly looked around, focusing on Nott and Jester, “Don’t we have a spare diamond we can crush or something?”

“I have a jeweler’s kit to do it,” Beau offered.

Jester was digging in her bag then, shaking her head. “I have one diamond that’s worth a lot more, for if one of us like… dies. And if the spell doesn’t work and we’re stuck here we might need it.”

“Same. Also Caleb's usually the one to crush my gems for me,” Caduceus called out, not even bothering to recheck his sparse pack.

Molly’s eyes darted to Nott. Nott always had shiny things on her person. She made eye contact with him and nodded beginning to search through her pack frantically, throwing around pieces of stolen jewelry and loose gemstones. “No diamonds. No diamonds…” she was muttering to herself, getting more and more frantic in her search.

“We can grab some on our way back, right?” Yasha asked, putting a firm hand on Caleb’s shoulder. He offered her a timid smile which she returned.

Beau came over and looked in Caleb’s eyes, getting too close. Caleb’s annoyed look was almost normal, with all the underlying love for the ridiculous woman clearly apparent when she was clearly bothering the hell out of him. “We can’t teleport with him like this. There’s no way he could cast the spell. We can walk until we find diamond dust or whatever, or think of a better plan. We’re in the middle of fucking nowhere.”

“Well, all spells wear off, right?” Fjord moved to the fringes of the group, frowning at Caleb. “Even the longest spell I have is only 24 hours. How long can this possibly last?”

That sparked a bit of hope in Molly. Maybe by tomorrow this would all be behind them. Then Beau spoke again. “From what I remember, 30 days. Well, 30 days until he can try and fight it off again.”

 _“Days?”_ Nott hissed, finally giving up on her pack and moving to point a finger accusingly around at Beau. _“Days_ where he can’t fucking defend himself? _Days_ until he can _try_ to fight off the spell again? Crush that big diamond right now!”

“Even if we did that, Caleb already cast a bunch of strong spells today. He might not be able to get us out of here, and then we’d be stuck here. In this dangerous fucking swampy jungle that might actually kill one of us. At least we can fix this.” Beau sat back up, defensive again. 

Fjord looked at the party beginning to split down the middle. Molly didn’t usually align himself with Nott, but he was starting to feel that way. And he knew Yasha would follow him. Caleb looked too vacant for comfort. Too empty. Fjord, trying to hold everyone to rational thought, said, “Well, Reani got us to the Empire, right? Jester, why don’t you message her and ask her to scry on us to get us out of here?”

Everyone settled, Nott begrudgingly agreeing that it was a pretty good plan. Jester shifted from one foot to another. “Well, I… I can’t send any more messages today. Caduceus?”

“I don’t have that spell prepared today.”

“Anyone’s phone have reception here?” Molly pulled a hand away to grab his phone, attempting to ignore the panicked look on Caleb’s face as he even pulled back that far. He used his tail to wrap around Caleb’s wrist and the wizard gingerly took the end in his fingertips, rubbing it like a worry stone. The others were trying to find reception; Beau even scaling a tree to try and get a text to send. Everyone slowly gave up on trying to call or text anyone.

“Tomorrow then. We can go back to the Cave of Remembrance and stay another night.” Fjord stood up, brushing off his clothes. “Maybe we can even ask one of them if they could send a message.”

“Sounds good. Let’s get the fuck out of here.” Beau grabbed her staff and moved to follow.

Jester frowned, “Shouldn’t we like, look at that wizard person and set them on fire? Like Caleb did?”

“If you want to do that, feel free. We’ll go ahead and let them know we need to stay the night,” Fjord said, taking Beau and Yasha with him.

They left, along with most of Molly’s distractions. Jester and Caduceus were whispering off on the edge of the clearing by the body, and Molly didn’t even want to eavesdrop. Nott was walking cautiously towards Caleb. “Do you think he’ll recognize me? I don’t want him to think I’m some awful goblin.” She looked like she might cry.

“I don’t think Caleb is that prejudiced against goblins to begin with,” Molly said, trying to be reassuring. “And he’s recognized all of us so far.”

Caleb saw Nott then and Molly started to pull away. Immediately the look of panic crept up on the wizard’s face again, so Molly moved back to keep his arm over Caleb’s shoulders. Once he had, Caleb looked to Nott and dropped Molly’s tail to reach out.

The relief on her face was heartbreaking. She still had her best friend. Caleb took her hand and just scooped her up to hold in his lap. In between the two of them the wizard made a soft contented sound and rested his head on Molly’s shoulder.

Nott stayed holding his hand, tears brimming in her eyes. “You and me. We’re supposed to be fine. We go down sometimes but we get back up and we’re fine. You’re fine. You devoted yourself to me. You have to cast the spell, remember? You’re my best friend. You have to be fine.”

Caleb didn’t seem to understand a word out of Nott’s mouth, finally content with Molly’s small embrace and her in his lap. Caleb just brushed the tears from her eyes, looking at her with more confusion. At least the wizard has stopped crying himself.

And hell if Molly knew what to say. He wasn’t the best with sincerity at good times.

He eventually went with a quiet promise, “We’ll get him back.”

Jester and Caduceus managed to get the mage to catch fire then, which seemed to catch Caleb’s attention. They stepped away from the pyre, holding a spellbook and a few other objects in their hands.

Molly bit his lip. They would have to walk by it on the way back to the Cave of Remembrance, but it would be better to get him safe inside. Somewhere they could properly look after him.

“C’mon, Caleb, let’s go. Nott, can you hold his hand? He seems to like the contact right now.” Molly helped him up, trying to reassure the scared man by holding him tightly around the waist and moving with him further down the beach. 

As soon as Caleb was walking comfortably, he was staring at the fire. Jester and Caduceus moved to join them, but he was still staring. Molly mumbled in his ear, trying to reassure him, though he knew Caleb couldn’t understand him. “It’s okay, that was a bad person. They tried to kill us. They did this to you. But we’re going to get Reani and diamonds and we’re going to fix it.”

But Caleb didn’t even seem to notice him talking.

He stepped away from Molly and Nott, walking to the corpse on fire.

“Wait, Caleb!” Nott cried out, trying to pull him back. She wasn’t strong enough, but Molly was able to catch the wizard’s arm.

Looking down at Molly stopping him in confusion, Caleb looked back at the fire. Then he raised his hand, waving it upwards in a strange gesture.

Molly stared as the fire grew almost ten feet higher immediately, and he tried to swallow the lump in his throat. Even like this, Caleb could be terrifying with fire. The wizard looked back to him with an excited spark in his eye, as if looking for approval. For a moment he could only nod, unsure of what to say. Eventually he went with, “Thank you, Caleb. That’s very helpful.”

And really, if it wasn’t so strange and unexpected, it would be. His fire was stronger, cracking bones into dust and would probably leave the mage nothing but a pile of ash in a matter of minutes.

It made sense that Caleb could control fire even like this. Fire was as much a part of him as anything else. Hells, Molly had literally seen him summon fire in his sleep. Even so, Molly resolved to not let Caleb out of his sight until they could fix this.

He took a deep breath. They could fix this. They had to.


	55. Feeblemind is a Bitch: Part 1, Broken

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> short chapter because feeblemind takes all your words away!! at first I was just going to have another Molly chapter, but this seemed like fun
> 
> (or, chapter in which Caleb receives some of the many hugs he deserves)

### Chapter 55: Feeblemind is a Bitch: Part 1, Broken 

Everything _hurt._

Everyone was fighting, Molly left, his _magic_ left, and everything _hurt._

Caleb was _broken._

Someone was talking.

He looked up at the sound, wondering why he couldn’t understand the voice. His cheeks were wet and Molly looked scared and sad. He looked back down at his hands. He really was broken.

A purple hand took and squeezed his broken hand. His hand that should weave magic incantations but instead did nothing. But it could hold this purple hand.

That was right.

That was good.

Caleb squeezed back. The purple hand was warm and soft, with a little blood smeared across the tattoos. He pulled it forward, wrapping his hands around the body attached to it. Mollymauk hugged him back and he could have sobbed at the relief of it. Maybe he had. It was hard to understand anything buried in the colorful neck. It was hard to understand anything at all, but he knew one thing.

Molly was back.

Someone else was talking, next to him. Probably to him.

He knew the voice. It was a good voice.

Caleb pulled back his head and saw a friend. Saw Jester.

Jester was good. She looked sad too. He moved to hug her as well, feeling a tingling warmth as she rubbed his back. It hurt less then, and confusion took over.

Then she pulled away, leaving Caleb alone again. He reached out but she still moved back. They were leaving him alone again.

The purple arm wrapped around his shoulders, tugging him to a purple scarred chest. Molly.

Molly was talking to him.

Molly was _staring_ at him.

Molly wanted him to talk _back,_ and he _couldn’t._ He opened his mouth to try and there was nothing there. He had no words.

He always had words.

He was _broken._

Another voice. Caduceus. He wanted Caleb to speak too. He was disappointing everyone.

Jester moved in front of him, worried, but touching him gently. She brushed the hair away from his eyes.

But she didn’t stay.

Everyone talked around him and he understood nothing. Yasha squeezed his shoulder. Beau stared at him a moment. His friends were here. Molly pulled away again but then wrapped his tail around Caleb’s chest. He wasn’t leaving Caleb alone again.

Someone was moving closer.

Nott. Veth. A friend. A good friend. She looked sad.

Everyone was _sad._

But Molly was trying to leave again. He looked at the tiefling and soon he had Nott in his lap and Molly’s arm wrapped around his shoulders. This was good. This was right.

Nott was crying. Caleb wiped away her tears, wondering why she would cry. They were together. This was how it should be.

They wanted him to move, but they stayed with him, taking his hands and making sure he knew where to follow. Jester and Caduceus were standing near something on fire. The man who did this to him. The man who broke him.

_Fire._

Caleb could control fire. That was as much a part of him as Molly had his tail or Yasha had her wings. Molly was saying things to him, not letting him move closer.

He could do it from there. He hoped.

His eyes lit up as the fire grew, consuming the bad person. Caleb still had fire running through his veins, and that was some small comfort. Some piece of what was supposed to be. Some small sliver that wasn’t broken.

Molly didn’t seem as pleased. But that didn’t stop the tiefling from taking care of him. Molly brought him inside, carefully washing away the blood and dirt. Caleb couldn’t heat the water, couldn’t bring fire to his fingertips like he was supposed to, so he had to sit and watch Molly fill a pot on the stove.

He couldn’t tell him he wouldn’t mind cold water.

He couldn't tell him he didn’t care about being dirty or bloody.

He couldn’t tell him not to let go of his hand.

He couldn’t tell him _anything._

All Caleb could do was follow and be grateful that he wasn’t being left behind. And that Molly’s tail never left his wrist.

Eventually Molly seemed satisfied with how clean Caleb was and he sat with him on their bedrolls, keeping him close and speaking softly in his ear. The words were nonsensical and he yearned to cast his spell to understand anything. To be normal. To not be broken. To be _useful_

But the voice was soft and soothing and eventually he was able to close his eyes and relax. His friends were safe and Molly was here.

For a long time he slept, just enjoying being held. Being with Mollymauk. If he had to be broken, at least he could be broken with his friends to help.

The next time he woke up, Yasha had come to sit with them, holding Molly’s hand and carding fingers through Caleb’s hair. He slept again, waking when Caduceus came to bring them to the room where they’d eaten over the past few days. There was food already there, and Caduceus handed him some bread to nibble at, though his appetite wasn’t very strong. Nott and Jester were speaking over a book.

Caleb wanted that book.

That book was powerful.

That book could help him do great things.

If he ever got back to normal. If they ever managed to fix him. If he ever stopped being broken.

The most he could do for now was look over their shoulders, wishing the glyphs made sense. Wishing he wasn’t so useless to his friends. 

And then Nott pulled out the magic stone. The stone connected to someone who was _not_ a friend, someone he needed to protect his friends from.

But he couldn't explain. The only sound that came out of his mouth was a whimper. Molly’s hand tightened around his, keeping Caleb in place.

Yasha began to speak from across the room, reaching for her sword. Caleb turned to her hopefully. She could destroy it, like the last one. 

He just couldn’t ask. 

He couldn’t tell them how dangerous it was. 

He couldn’t tell them who held the other stone. 

He couldn’t tell Nott to drop it when he felt the crackle of arcane energy from it. 

All he could do was snatch it out of her hands in a rare moment of agility. It had started to glow with a faint blue light, its pattern familiar but still confusing. He didn’t have time to drop it or throw it. He didn’t have time to do anything before the message was received. 

He didn’t know what the voice in the stone said. Caleb just knew it was _him._

The next thing he knew, Yasha was prying the now dull stone from his hand. He didn’t see where it went. It was safe with her. He trusted her.

But he wasn’t safe. Not with that voice ringing in his head. That voice that was full of stabbing pains and blood and suffocating ash. That voice that sent his stomach into knots, threatening the food Caduceus had given him. His forearms ached and he couldn't understand why.

His friends weren’t safe.

He couldn’t protect himself.

He couldn’t protect them.

He couldn’t do _anything._

He was weak. 

A failure. 

_Broken._


	56. Feeblemind is a Bitch: Part 2, Fuck

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> a nice long chapter to make up for the last short one!

### Chapter 56: Feeblemind is a Bitch: Part 2, Fuck

The Feeblemind spell was _awful,_ and the Mighty Nein was stuck at the Cave of Remembrance, in the middle of bumfuck nowhere. Molly could tell seeing Caleb like this, like a husk, like a confused child, just _empty_ , was shattering for Nott. He’d been like a son to her all this time. Even when _he_ was taking care of _her,_ she treated him like she would treat her own. His flashbacks and panic attacks were always hard on her, but this was different. This was thirty days. Or more. Or he might never be able to fight off the spell on his own. Even though Reani was probably able to show up soon, or if they broke down and crushed one of Jester or Caduceus’s diamonds.

But Molly could see her, staring at the dried blood, at the vacant _(empty)_ look in Caleb’s eye, at how he watched the Stone family like a hawk whenever they were in the room, like they might be a threat. Nott needed a break, but she’d never say so. And Molly needed to worry about Caleb and Nott and the rest of the group so he didn’t break into a million pieces. He wasn’t going to think about people being empty. About the person he loved being empty.

He couldn’t bear to.

“I think I’ll take him to the bathroom. See if I can’t get some of the blood off. Also he might need to relieve himself and doesn’t know where or how to ask. I doubt you want to see that,” Molly said, trying to find an excuse for Nott to go relax.

She looked at him, nodding, but still worried. “No funny business.”

“I might look like a devil, but I’m really not all that bad. I’ll take care of him, yeah?” He leaned over to ruffle her hair. “Go take a breather. Get something to eat.”

Nott just stared, clearly torn. “He’s my boy. You know that?”

“Of course. I promise I’ll do everything I can to make him safe and comfortable. Now and always.” Molly tried to put enough sincerity into the phrase without letting his emotions through, pretty sure that if even one tear dropped he would crumble and the dam would break.

She quirked up a brow. “Always?”

Molly only nodded. He didn’t trust his voice. Of course he would. He would find a way to make sure Caleb was safe and comfortable if it took him the rest of his life.

She gave him a long, appraising look, then nodded. “I’m glad he has us both then. He needs more people who love him.”

His heart lurched. It wasn’t that surprising that she knew. But the fact that she could say it before he could, even if Caleb didn’t understand, it hurt. This whole fucking situation hurt and Molly couldn’t do a damn thing about it. “He does. Now go get something to eat. Relax. He needs to get cleaned up and I’ve got this for now.”

Nott looked like she wanted to protest but just sighed. At first she didn’t move, fishing in her pockets for something, then took out her flask and offered it to Molly. He cracked a grateful, tired smile and took a swig. “Fuck, that’s nasty.”

“It’s what we’ve got,” she said, taking a slug herself and patting him on the shoulder. “Thank you. If you… need a minute. I can take over.”

Molly ruffled her hair again, nodding. “Will do.”

She moved to hug Caleb tightly around the middle, mumbling soft things in his ear that Molly didn’t try to overhear. “Make sure he doesn’t, like, drown in the tub or something,” Nott said, brushing the red hair out of Caleb’s eyes. Molly made a note to tie it back after he cleaned the blood out of it.

“I think I’m better off for that job than you, no offense.”

Nott glared, but just took another sip from the flask and wandered off. There wasn’t as much malice behind it as there was a few months ago. Presumably she went to the kitchen, but Molly wasn’t going to pry. Not when he had to haul Caleb to his feet and convince him not to follow Nott.

“C’mon, we need to clean you up. Every time Nott sees the blood on you she looks like she might cry,” Molly mumbled, still not used to the fact that he was basically talking to himself. 

Caleb just stared at him, confused, but allowed himself to be led back to the small home that had served as their shelter last night. Staring at the tub, Molly chewed his lip. Nott needed a break, and to be perfectly honest seeing Caleb covered in blood again was grating against Molly’s soul, but he had no way to heat the water.

But, at the very least, he’d been right about Caleb needing the bathroom. Thankfully Molly could add that to the list of things that the wizard seemed to be able to do on his own. Follow friends, hug people, be worried about strangers…

He sighed softly, digging around in the small kitchenette and figuring out that the electric stove hadn’t stopped working, thankfully. Starting to fill up a pot with water, he almost jumped out of his skin when Caleb appeared behind him, hugging around his waist and hiding his face in Molly’s neck.

Realizing it was just Caleb, Molly’s muscles lost some of their tenseness and he turned to kiss the wizard on the cheek. “Hi there. It’s kinda nice to know you’re a very cuddly person, deep down. When you’re not worried about as much and all. Could do to put a little cat collar with a bell on you though.”

Caleb just stared back at him blankly, looking pleased to be close.

He couldn’t help it then, the tears pricking at his eyes finally spilling over. He wasn’t expecting anything really, maybe just more confusion, so when Caleb tried to spin him around, gingerly wiping the tears off Molly’s cheeks, it only made it worse. Biting his lip, he pulled the wizard close, burying his own face in Caleb’s neck, trying not to poke him with the horns.

“Is it dumb to miss you when you’re right here?” he mumbled, feeling the arms wrap around and hold him. It was too familiar and too different. Molly would have done anything to hear a soft rumble with that perfect Zemnian accent, either making a dumb joke or being reassuring, even saying he wasn’t okay. Just something to hold onto.

Instead Caleb just tightened his grip, keeping him close. It wasn’t much, but it was more than nothing. There was some shred of his wizard in there, and he needed comfort and love more than ever. So Molly took a deep breath. “You’re with me. I know that. I hope you don’t remember all this later. I didn’t mean to break down. This is about you.” He pulled back and brushed the hair from Caleb’s eyes, tenderly kissing his forehead.

“Now let’s get you cleaned up.”

Molly was impatient, just warming the one pot of water and grabbing a cloth to clean the dried blood and dirt away without filling the tub. Caleb was left in his boxers which was probably better for everyone. This was all weird enough, but seeing the wizard with no modesty might have pushed Molly over the edge again. Instead he just cleaned him up with a few cloths as well as he could, gentle as possible and having the man lean over the sink so he could comb all the dried blood out of his hair.

With no hair dryer, Molly did the best he could with a towel before tying the hair back from Caleb’s eyes, leaving half of it down so it would dry better.

When they were finished, with Caleb ending up in one of Molly’s hoodies since he’d gotten another shirt and cardigan destroyed, Molly just laid out their sleeping bags again, keeping his tail around Caleb’s wrist. He didn’t want to sit in the common room when there was nothing to do and nothing Caleb wanted more than to be held. It may have only been early afternoon, but Molly was already completely exhausted, mentally and physically, after the fight and the aftermath.

So he turned to invite Caleb to sit with him, surprised to see the wizard smelling the hoodie, looking content. He almost cracked a smile. “You think I smell good? Or just my laundry detergent?”

Caleb only cocked his head, confusion painting his features for a moment before Molly stepped up and took both his hands to lead them both to the bedroll. “Don’t worry. It’s cute. You smell good too. Like old books and woodsmoke. And pastries. I think working below Nott and Jester’s shop has infused all your clothes with cinnamon.”

He curled up with Caleb resting against his chest, trying to rest. Trying to let the mingling smells of old books, woodsmoke, cinnamon, lavender and incense wash over him until he fell asleep.

Of course it wouldn’t come.

“I hope you’re feeling okay,” Molly mumbled to Caleb, rubbing the wizard’s back in what he hoped were comforting circles. Talking seemed to be good, as long as it wasn’t a question. Caleb’s breath was slowing steadily, so he’d probably fall asleep before Molly. Strong spells seemed to really drain him physically, and he’d been giving that damned mage everything he had.

“You look less empty than before. It’s good. I… I didn’t much care for that feeling.”

Caleb made a soft sound, just moving closer. Molly pulled up the sleeping bag so he wouldn’t be cold and kept talking. “I know I don’t talk about that much. I’ll tell you when you’re feeling better, if you want. I know you’ve told me pretty much everything you can about your past, even though I told you it doesn’t matter to me.”

He sighed, letting his fingers continue to make small circles on Caleb’s back. “It matters to you, though. You can always tell me stuff. I hope you know that.”

“I’m going to rip Ikithon’s head off his shoulders for this,” he mumbled, kissing Caleb’s temple before sighing deeply and realizing the wizard was fast asleep. “Or not. I’m not sure you’d actually like that. Beau and I are gonna get him though. We’re going to make him pay for everything. Maybe with the law on our side, if Beau can hook us up with her Cobalt Soul connections.”

“I’ll make sure you feel safe.”

There was a soft knock on the door, too quiet to be Nott. Molly called for them to come in as quietly as he could. Yasha peeked her head in, quiet for a moment before asking, “May I come in?”

Molly nodded, patting the ground above him and Caleb, unable to move with Caleb asleep on his arm. She sat with a small sound of exertion that made the wizard blink his eyes open for a moment, confused before seeing the source of the noise and offering a small smile. Yasha smiled back apologetically and patted his head, moving her fingers through his hair. “He looks a bit better.”

“He’s very cuddly like this,” Molly said softly, letting Yasha take the hand that wasn’t pinned and squeeze it gently.

“Are you okay? He looked… earlier. You know.”

Of course Yasha knew. She was too good not to. Molly tried to keep his body still as his breath hitched. “Yeah, I’m… I’m okay. I think this is better than me not being here, at least.”

She nodded, not pressing the issue but also not letting go of his hand. And she stayed there, humming a soft sound in Celestial that tugged on something deep in Molly’s memory. It was a small something, but it was nostalgic and peaceful. She’d done similarly when she first found him, when he still had grave dirt under his fingernails and no words other than “empty.”

Molly never slept, but he finally relaxed, at least safe with his favorite people.

Caduceus came to tell them he’d made dinner later that night, breaking up their little party and having them lead Caleb back to the room where they ate.

“Caleb never lets me look at his spellbook,” Jester said, flipping through the book they’d found earlier.

Nott said, “You drew a dick on one of the pages the one time he did! It’s no wonder he doesn’t trust you.”

Caduceus had given Caleb a piece of bread, which thankfully he was eating without confusion or cause for concern. Now he was walking over, drawn to the girls or the book. Molly couldn’t quite tell until he started looking over their shoulders, straining a bit against their clasped hands to get a closer look. Moving with him, he peeked at the book too, understanding nothing. Caduceus and Fjord were explaining to Yasha about how Reani was coming to get them in the morning, once she could prepare all the right spells and find some diamond dust.

Jester rolled her eyes and kept talking, “I’m very trustworthy. And that spell looks much better with a dick near it. Anyways, do you think Caleb will want this rock too? I think it’s just a rock, but I have no idea.”

“The carvings are pretty, if I can have it,” Nott said with a shrug, picking up the stone.

Caleb’s whole body tensed at that, but before Molly could say anything, Yasha moved over from gathering her own food, “Oh, Caleb had me destroy the enchantment on one of those. The other mages had one.” Caleb was looking at her hopefully, relaxing just a bit.

“Yeah? Is it dangerous?” Nott asked, turning it over in her hands. Caleb _whimpered_ and Molly’s hand instinctually tightened around his.

Many things happened at once.

Molly started to say, “Maybe we should put it down for now-”

Just as Yasha stepped closer, explaining, “He said it’s connected to Ikithon-”

And Nott said, “I think it’s doing something, it feels funny-”

While something in Caleb snapped, bristling like a spooked wild animal as he lunged for and snatched away the stone.

Then the stone started glowing in his hands, his eyes blown wide with fear.

“Caleb, put that down! What’s it doing to you?” Nott reached out for him, but he scrambled backwards with it, stumbling and curling up against the wall with the stone still clutched in his hand. He didn’t want to give it back to her.

Yasha moved over while Molly remained frozen, trying not to panic at the look of terror on Caleb’s face. This was worse than the battle. He looked like he was trembling so badly that he’d break apart. She paid his state no mind, plucking the stone away from him with ease and grabbing her sword to dispel its magic. “It was connected to Ikithon. I think he can talk through it. Well, not anymore. But he heard him.”

“Ikithon spoke to him? Through the rock?” Nott asked, slowly realizing what he was trying to protect her against.

Caleb was still curled up against the wall, and Molly was still frozen. He couldn’t deal with this. He couldn’t help and he felt like shit.

Yasha was holding it together. Yasha was the one to pick him up and tell everyone to join her in Molly’s room. Caleb stopped trembling just a bit in Yasha’s arms, but tears still streamed down his face. Molly followed behind like a lost dog, trying not to get consumed by his own feelings of panic and despair. There was no time for that now. There’d be time for that later.

Now, Caleb needed him.

And Yasha had decided what that meant, instructing everyone to make a big cuddling pile in the middle of the room where Molly and Caleb had slept the night before. Caleb’s head ended up in Yasha’s lap, and she motioned for Molly to come over and lie on one side. Nott and Jester curled up on the other side, with Jester saying soft nothings to try and keep the mood light. She even brought in her radio, playing soft music while everyone else huddled close. Beau sat next to Yasha, leaning her head on the tall woman.

Jester convinced Fjord to cuddle up beside her, and Caduceus made himself comfortable close enough to Molly for him to feel the warmth but not enough to be restricting. With Yasha’s hands running through his hair, Nott curled up against his chest and Jester and Molly’s arms locked around his waist, Caleb calmed slowly, eventually drifting off to sleep. Molly wasn’t long after, completely exhausted.

In the morning they gathered around the tree where Reani would be coming through, after she had the chance to scry on the party sitting there (well, on Jester sitting there) and buy some diamond dust. Caduceus tried to make it as normal as possible with a breakfast picnic, but it still felt weird.

Everything was slightly off.

Caduceus’s breakfast supplies were running out, so they were left with little single serving cartons of soymilk and strange organic cereal that tasted fine, but different. Jester and Beau’s casual conversation had a sharp edge to it, unlike their normal bickering. And Caleb didn’t seem to have full control over utensils and what they were for, so after Nott opened up the box of cereal for him he began to just eat the pieces with his fingers.

At least he was eating. After last night he was much more reserved, but he was still calmer as long as someone was holding him.

Molly was eating his weird cereal with one hand, balancing the little container in his lap so he could keep one arm around Caleb’s shoulders.

But soon Reani rushed through the tree. “Hey guys! I hope you haven’t been waiting long!”

Caleb tensed at the appearance of a new person but seemed to relax when he saw the familiar face, returning the smile she gave him with a timid one of his own. The others greeted her with similar relief, letting her onto the picnic blanket to get to Caleb. He let her rub the top of his head with the glittering diamond dust, catching the light as she spoke some arcane words.

He shivered, blinking a moment with some of the glitter still caught on his lashes. “Ah, danke.”

“Caleb!” Nott screamed, instantly lunging for him and wrapping her arms around him. “You’re back!” she said, voice raw with emotion.

“Ja, sorry, Schatz,” he mumbled, cheeks darkening. “Sorry for being such a burden on you all.”

Molly shook his head quickly, hugging him even though Nott was still wrapped around him. “You’re not a burden. You’ll never be a burden to us.”

Jester nodded, and surged forward to join the hug, “Of course not, Caleb! Everyone get in here! Even you, Beau!”

The monk rolled her eyes but joined in the hug, even Reani laughing and wrapping her arms around all of the Mighty Nein. “Welcome back, Caleb. Sounds like everyone missed you!”


	57. Greater Restoration of the Heart

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's just all fluff. The fluffiest fluff.

### Chapter 57: Greater Restoration of the Heart 

Suddenly after regaining his sense of self, Molly was hugging him, alongside Nott. “You’re not a burden. You’ll never be a burden to us.” The tiefling’s voice was raw and his eyes were still a bit puffy. Caleb couldn’t help but blame himself for it, but he didn’t have time to dwell.

Jester nodded to agree with Molly, and surged forward to join the hug, “Of course not, Caleb! Everyone get in here! Even you, Beau!”

The monk rolled her eyes but joined in the hug, and even Reani, to Caleb’s surprise, laughed and wrapped her arms around all of the Mighty Nein. “Welcome back, Caleb. Sounds like everyone missed you!”

He nodded, trying to keep the overwhelming wave of emotions at bay. "Danke, thank you, everyone. Let's go home, ja?"

"Hell yeah," Beau said, clapping him on the shoulder as she pulled back. "Let's get the fuck out of here."

"Seconded," said Fjord.

Some other murmurs of consent were all Caleb needed to dig in his pockets for the fancy chalk, grateful for having purchased a bunch before leaving for the Empire. After a few moments into the walk, he summoned Frumpkin around his shoulders, setting him up as a little purring scarf. Yasha and Jester chatted with Reani along the way. Nott kept her hand wrapped tightly around his, and Molly’s arm was snug around his waist. Caleb had to clear his throat a bit to be released, moving to the stone slab to draw the teleportation circle. Today there were no interruptions, and there was a flash of light before they arrived in Yussa's tower.

Wizard towers made him a bit uncomfortable on a normal day. With Ikithon’s voice clear as day in his mind from just yesterday, knowing another powerful wizard who would fight at Caleb's side was nearby was more comforting than anything. Still, he showed everyone out carefully and quickly. Wensforth gave a surprised acknowledgement but said little other than that he would tell Yussa that Caleb had returned. He nodded but didn’t doddle for smalltalk after handing over the magic items from the mages. He could look at them later, with Yussa nearby to avoid any unnecessary complications. Everyone wanted to go home and unwind. Even Nott wanted some time with her family before they tried the spell again. They agreed to go home and come together at Jester’s tomorrow to try it.

It had been a long journey.

The others said their goodbyes, splitting up into pairs to take cabs in different directions. No one really wanted to deal with the subway after the ordeal. Caleb couldn’t wait for the stronger teleportation spell to be within his power so he could just appear places without spending 50 gold just to avoid public transportation.

Beau and Jester’s rideshare showed up first, even before Yasha managed to hail a cab. Beau gave him a strong clap on the shoulder. “It’s good to have you back, man. Take a break from getting fucked up for a while, yeah?”

“I’ll try my best,” he grumbled, rubbing his shoulder a moment before Jester moved over to hug him. Molly took a step back, but his tail wrapped around Caleb’s ankle.

She squeezed a little too tight, but Caleb didn’t really care. He was still just surprised everyone seemed to care about him so much. “We mean it, Caleb. Stay safe, okay? Or at least keep my number on speed dial. Or Caduceus. Or both!”

“Ja, okay, Jester,” he said, trying to avoid being poked by horns. It was harder than with Molly since she was so short.

Caduceus gave him a brief hug too. “I am just a call away. You know that.”

Caleb just nodded. Fjord gave a small wave. “We’re quite glad to have you back, but I’m sure that’s been said enough. We’ll see you at Jester’s tomorrow?”

“Sure. Danke, Fjord.” This much attention on Caleb felt awkward, and Fjord seemed grateful when Yasha offered him and Caduceus the cab she finally hailed.

Eventually Molly and Yasha joined Caleb in an empty cab, smushing him into the middle and getting him back to their apartment. Each of them pressed into his sides was grounding, especially since Molly seemed to think he still needed to hold on to him at all times. Caleb was surprised to find that he liked it, the warm pressure of having his hand held or Molly’s arm around his waist another point of grounding contact. Even when they got inside, his tail wrapped its way around Caleb’s wrist.

Being back to himself was strange. With Ikithon’s voice fresh in his mind, he expected to be more panicked. But he felt relatively calm with Molly and Yasha at his side. They were hundreds of miles away from the Empire, and no one knew how to find him or his friends, as far as he knew. He’d figure out how Ikithon was tracking him later; but if it was any of the mages’ items, they were safe in Yussa’s tower.

"Gods, it's good to be home," Molly said, throwing his backpack down with a thud that would probably scare their downstairs neighbors. Caleb did the same, with less impact, and hung up his coat.

Yasha grunted her agreement before telling the tiefling she had first dibs on the shower since he would take two hours. He pouted but gave in, and then he and Caleb were alone.

"Mollymauk?" Caleb fiddled with the hem of his hoodie, still wrapped up in the oversized purple thing Molly had given him. He’d probably need to go shopping with Jester again so his clothes weren’t all bloodstained.

He moved closer, looking at Caleb. "Yeah?"

"I just wanted to thank you. For everything, really. I know… I know it wasn't easy." Caleb sighed and sat on the corner of the still made up pull out couch with Frumpkin jumping down into his lap. Molly had done so much for him, and he was starting to feel the scales tip in a way he couldn’t rebalance.

Molly just sat beside him and wrapped his arm around Caleb’s shoulders. “Would you have done the same if it was me?”

“Of course, but-”

He shook his head, cutting him off with a quick kiss on the cheek. “That’s all that matters. We would have done the same for Jester, or Yasha, or Beau, or Fjord. Hells, we went to the Empire for Nott and fought that gross gorgon thing for Caduceus. Making sure you didn’t wander into the jungle for the day was nothing.”

Caleb shook his head. “Fighting those mages isn’t nothing. None of you should have been hurt because of me.”

He was selfish, staying with them. He knew that. But his selfishness had finally caught up to him and put his friends in danger.

Molly sighed softly and nuzzled into his shoulder. The intimacy was nice, though Caleb was feeling overwhelmingly like he needed to leave again. “We’d do it again. Yasha’s demons are behind her, and so are Fjord’s, well mostly. We took care of Nott’s and Caduceus’s. It’s only fair that you’re next, right?”

“My demons are a bit stronger than a gorgon,” he said, just staring at Frumpkin. At least he’d have his cat this time. And with three new spellbooks to peruse, he could get stronger. Maybe he could get stronger on his own and then come back. He could leave and make a plan to kill Ikithon, then come back. But he’d promised Molly he’d tell him if he left.

Caleb couldn’t face that now. And he wasn’t sure he could bring himself to come back if he was that awful of a liar. Molly deserved better. In many regards.

But Molly still just said, “Then we’ll get stronger. Or make more friends. We’re not letting you go; that much should be clear by now.”

And it was. 

And it was _tempting._

And Caleb was weak. 

So instead of packing up his bag in the middle of the night and slipping away to Tal’Dorei like he should, he took a long hot shower and slipped back into Molly’s hoodie that smelled like lavender and incense. With the sweatpants Molly had given him when his apartment burned down, the ribbon Jester had given him to tie his hair back, and the cat boxers Nott had bought him for one Winter’s Crest, he was covered in little tokens of people caring about him.

It was early yet, but Molly still invited him to curl up under the covers of his colorful bed. They ordered Xhorhasian takeout for themselves and Yasha, who agreed to answer the door and handle the exchange of coin so that they could rest.

Caduceus called Caleb while they were picking something to pull up on Netflix to tell him that his family was questioned before they left the palace. They’d given a different description of his appearance, but had been truthful about their location. That was likely what had been the issue, and they’d apologized profusely despite Caduceus telling them it wasn’t their fault.

Now the Mighty Nein was hundreds of miles away, and the Clays hadn’t said a word about their other son in Nicodranas. Caleb was probably far enough away. That and Yussa was around if he ever really needed help. He was very close to figuring out the more advanced teleportation spell, so if he was ever found again he could be anywhere in seconds.

It was a better solution than running, when everyone needed him. When everyone had gone to such lengths to make sure he was okay and safe.

Nott needed him to cast the spell tomorrow. And Molly wanted him to stay.

With the tiefling in question wrapped around his back, occasionally kissing the top of his head, Caleb would have been hard pressed to take that away from him. Not when he was enjoying it too, halfways to falling asleep already as Gilmore and Sherri introduced the next bakers on the latest season of the Great Marquesian Baking Show.

Molly had even pulled up Infernal subtitles for him to practice, though it was hard to read them through his eyelids. The urge to leave faded into nothingness, replaced by the feeling of the warm purple arm holding him close. Replaced by the warm chest he leaned against, lulling him to a gentle restful state. Replaced by the gentle kisses Molly kept peppering into his hair and temple as they rested. Replaced by utter comfort as he drifted in and out. He felt _safe._

A soft knock brought him back to consciousness, the gentle light of the string lights and the instrumental theme song of the next episode ensuring him that he was safe and sound. Yasha peeked her head in, “Food’s here.”

“Thanks, Yash,” Molly said over a yawn, pulling back to stretch his arms but leaving his tail wrapped around Caleb’s ankle.

She nodded and slipped back into the kitchenette. Caleb could hear the sound of cabinets opening and the rustle of the paper bag as she got out her own food.

Suppressing a yawn of his own, Caleb rolled and stretched his neck. 

Molly nuzzled back into him, sneaking a kiss on Caleb’s temple. “I don’t want to move.”

Caleb laughed and turned to face him. “I don’t particularly want to either.”

The way Molly was staring at him made Caleb squirm a bit. It was too soft, too tender. Yet the little voice that said he didn’t deserve good things stayed silent. All the voices in his head quieted and he was left without any words but, “Was?”

Molly cupped his cheek, rubbing his thumb along the freckled surface. “I’m just glad to have you back. I know you were there, kind of, but it was different. I missed you… being you.”

There were no words in the world.

So Caleb kissed him, and every doubt lurking in the back of his mind melted away. Despite everything that had happened, they’d made it through and they were together. It was all he could have hoped for. He wouldn’t have even entertained this possibility but a few months ago.

But with Molly smiling into the kiss and winding his hand around the back of Caleb’s neck to pull him closer, Caleb couldn’t picture himself anywhere else. How could he run from this? He’d sacrifice just about anything if he could stay right here, with Molly, knowing his friends were safe and sound and happy.

It was perfect.


	58. Veth the Brave

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> sleepy morning cuddles and our favorite halfling!

### Chapter 58: Veth the Brave 

For the first time in the week that had felt like a year, Molly felt like he could breathe. They were back in Nicodranas after spending time in the Empire and Southern Xhoras. Caduceus had saved and been reunited with his family. Nott’s curse was broken and they would be returning her to her original form today. Caleb had survived two different attempts on his life and was still sound asleep, pinning Molly’s arm to the bed.

There would be no more sneaking around, stealing kisses when no one was looking. No more sense of underlying danger. Just warmth and cuddles and quiet sleepy kisses. He leaned forward and kissed Caleb’s temple before grabbing his phone.

Jester had messaged the group chat first thing in the morning.

> **Jester:** I’m making breakfast for everyone!!  
>  **Jester:** & coffee!!  
>  **Jester:** (& juice for people who hate coffee)  
>  **Jester:** Just bring your lovely selves!! ♥♥♥  
>  **Jester:** (& all the clay, I have no clay here)
> 
> **Caduceus:** Don’t worry, the clay is handled  
>  **Caduceus:** And thank you for also having juice, Jester  
>  **Caduceus:** I can bring tea as well
> 
> **Beau:** clay brings clay  
>  **Beau:** sick
> 
> **Fjord:** It is way too early for all this.
> 
> **Molly:** I’m bringing Caleb! Obviously the most important part ♥
> 
> **Nott:** clearly caleb and i are the most important parts  
>  **Nott:** but thank u for breakfast, jester
> 
> **Jester:** Awwww, you're welcome!!!!!!  
>  **Jester:** ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥
> 
> **Caleb:** Why do I have 16 new messages?

Molly snorted, not even realizing Caleb had woken up and moving to nuzzle into the man’s neck. Caleb hadn’t stopped Molly’s instinct to stay close even after the Feeblemind spell wore off, and Molly was more than happy to stay as close as possible. He never wanted to let go.

“Good morning, sleepy head,” Molly said, kissing his cheek.

He turned to look up at Molly, smiling softly. Molly wished he had Caleb's knack for remembering things in that moment. Auburn hair all messed up, gentle sleepy smile, bright blue eyes the farthest from empty they ever could be. Molly wanted to save this memory forever. “Guten Morgen," Caleb said, his voice still gruff from sleep and his accent far too thick and sexy.

How could he not kiss him?

Caleb only kissed back for a moment before pulling back with a chuckle. "As much as I'd love to spend the morning like that, I think we're expected uptown."

"Can't they start without us?" he asked, wanting to pout but unable to stop grinning.

Caleb rolled his eyes and kissed Molly's nose. He almost melted at how goddamn tender it was. "They could start without you, I suppose. If you wanted to stay here and take in some pleasure all by your lonesome," he teased.

"True, true. I could wake up nice and slow and film the whole thing to send you while you're with everyone else," Molly teased right back.

A delicious blush crept up on Caleb's cheeks and Molly revelled in the opportunity to kiss them both. "Sorry, I'll get up now," Molly said then realized Caleb was still pinning him down by lying on his arm. "Once you let me."

The blush didn't fade but Caleb met his eyes. "And if I don't?"

Molly smirked. "Well, I certainly won't complain. But the longer we take, the more questions you'll get asked."

Groaning and burying his face in Molly’s shoulder with another squeeze, Caleb mumbled something in Zemnian that Molly couldn't understand. His warm breath tickled over Molly’s bare shoulder and he suppressed a shiver.

"What was that, dear?"

"You shouldn't be allowed to be so attractive when you're right," Caleb grumbled, punctuating the thought with a bite to Molly's collarbone that he absolutely wasn't expecting. His breath hitched and he just had to kiss away the smug look on Caleb’s face. His wizard pulled away, laughing. "Of course you'd like people biting you."

Molly rolled his eyes. "I like _you_ biting me. I'm yours."

Somehow that made Caleb blush more, and Molly was sure he was two minutes from actually melting into a puddle. This was just too cute. Caleb bit his lip and pulled him closer, hugging them tightly together. "I'm yours. If you'll have me."

He had known; that was how Caleb had signed his note after all (something he would bring up at a less perfect time), but it was still something else to hear it out loud. It was soft. It was tender. It was everything he wanted. Even if he was still scared to say he loved Caleb, they had this. Caleb wasn’t pushing him away, or doubting himself. In fact he was clinging to him like he could somehow manage to bring them closer if he only tried hard enough.

"I don't want anyone else," Molly said, unable to keep himself from breaking through the utter softness of the moment by nipping Caleb's collarbone. The man let out a small sound and instinctually rolled his hips.

Molly pulled back then, sitting them both up with too broad a grin. "Okay, I think we could definitely get distracted here. But I think we should probably get going if we're going to get you some breakfast."

As if to answer his question, Caleb's stomach growled. "Fine, fine."

He kissed Caleb’s temple. "Rain check, dear. I'll still be yours tonight."

The beautiful blush came back, Caleb ducking to hide in the crook of his neck once more. Delicately, so quiet he barely heard it, the word "Mine," washed over purple skin, making Molly really shiver. He could feel a small smile against his skin, then a kiss, then a bite, and then he couldn't help but groan as Caleb sucked the skin, leaving a mark behind.

He pulled back, the smug look painted across his features yet again. "I haven't done that since I was seventeen."

"Glad you remembered how," Molly tried to tease while willing his heart rate to slow. The look of smugness only grew. It was far too attractive. Unfairly attractive.

The knock on the door almost made him jump out of his skin.

"You guys want to take a cab or the subway?" Yasha called through a crack in the door. Yarrow pushed through and jumped up on the bed to lick at Molly’s face.

"Subway's fine with me," Molly called out, slipping out of bed and pulling a pair of jeans on while trying to avoid stepping on Yarrow’s paws. Frumpkin was hiding on the head of the bed, avoiding the dog. "Just gotta brush my teeth."

Yasha nodded and called Yarrow away. 

"And maybe find a shirt," Caleb said, though he was grinning.

Molly rolled his eyes. "Maybe. Maybe I'll go shirtless and let everyone see I'm yours."

Caleb didn’t stop blushing until they were at Jester’s and she started practically force feeding him a muffin. Molly only laughed, and Beau and Nott were eager to back up the exuberant tiefling and insist he needed to eat more.

It didn’t take everyone long to eat and get caffeine in their systems and to grow antsy to begin. Fjord was eventually the one to ask. “Is there anything we can help with, Caleb? Veth?”

“Right, where should I set up all the clay?” Caduceus asked.

Slowly Caleb directed everyone to take certain tasks, setting up what they could in Jester’s bathroom. She insisted she could buy a new bathtub if things went poorly.

Caleb held his hand out to the little goblin girl. “You sure you are ready?”

“No,” she said, shifting from one foot to the other, “but I’m going to do it anyway!”

Jester laughed, but Nott wasn’t finished yet. “And I'm not sure what will happen afterwards, but you know, no matter what, you guys will help me get through it. And if for some reason I don't come back or come back different or something, you know how much you all mean to me and Jester, I hope we have more adventures together.”

The blue tiefling grinned, kissing her on the nose, “Me too.”

“Caduceus,” Nott said, turning to the firbolg, “thank you for being honest and showing us that you can be scared, too. And that's okay. Yasha, I'm, like, 60% sure you're not evil now.”

Yasha snorted as Caduceus ruffled her hair. She said, “That should be a lower percentage.”

Nott laughed with her and nodded before turning to Fjord. “Fjord, I'm sorry that I always call you weak, but I only do that because I know you're strong enough to take it. Mollymauk, I’m sorry that I give you a hard time, but only a little sorry. Beau, thank you for taking care of Mr. Caleb. And Caleb, you know, I love you and you're the second love of my life. Thank you for being with me.”

Molly stuck his tongue out at her, but watched as Caleb knelt down and gave her a hug. “I love you, too. Veth the Brave.”

Caleb pulled back and took her hand, leading her into the tub.

Beau started lighting incense, so Molly went to help while Caleb began to prepare the ritual. Then the arcane energy began to fill the room and the clay began to glow. Molly could see the sheer power radiating off Caleb in waves as the clay started to grow warm, then red hot, then white hot in the bathtub, completely covering Nott.

Caleb grew louder and louder as he spoke the arcane words, eyes glowing with an orange light themselves, hair dancing in an unseen wind, tracing complicated glyphs and sigils in the air. As he finished the clay shattered and the wave of energy almost knocked everyone over, the power coming off the wizard tangible. The floor shook. Jester’s bathtub shattered, her curse lost in the aftershock of arcane force.

The grin across Caleb’s face was the sexiest goddamn thing Molly had ever seen. It was a combination of overwhelming love and elation for his best friend, and a deep sense of pride in having changed the fabric of the universe for her.

“You are not… the goblin I first met,” he said, lifting her out of the pile of shattered porcelain and giving her a quick squeeze.

“Did it work?” she asked, voice deep and sultry before hacking a moment. “Ugh, god, clay in my throat.”

Beau just handed her a mirror and let her take it all in. Tears streamed down her cheeks as she saw herself, her real self, for the first time in years. Jester surged forward to hug her, grinning ear to ear.

“Should we go get Yeza? Go get a celebration brunch or something? That was more work than I thought it would be; I would have made something more than muffins!” Jester said, wanting to keep the group together and happy.

Yasha said, “Beau and I could walk over to pick up Yeza and Luc.”

Nott, no _Veth_ nodded, “I’d like to get the clay off me first, so that might be good. Maybe we could go to that Marquesian place? I heard the guy from the Great Marquesian Baking Show just opened it.”

“Oh, I heard they make a killer brunch,” Beau said, grinning down at the halfling.

Caduceus nodded, “I’ve heard good things. Someone could go ahead and make reservations, make sure we get good seats. Getting nine people at one table might take a while.”

“Molly and I can walk over there,” Caleb said. “I don’t think I can sit still.”

That was normally Molly’s issue, but Caleb did look uncharacteristically like he could get up and do a bunch of jumping jacks or something. Molly just nodded in agreement, watching with joy as Caleb kissed Veth on the forehead and took his hand without a care in the world.

Even when Jester started squealing, Caleb just rolled his eyes and never lost his smile. Molly couldn’t have been happier as Caleb stopped to kiss him, chastely but sweetly, before the elevator doors opened in Jester’s apartment building.

Life was very good.


	59. Normalcy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Spell transcriptions, grieving, and taking care of those you love instead of yourself

### Chapter 59: Normalcy 

Life was gradually going back to some semblance of normal. Well. Caleb’s apartment was still burnt to a crisp, and his relationship with Molly was progressing. But they were together back in Nicodranas and there was little imminent danger, as far as they could tell. Molly had time off from his jobs after their harrowing journey, but Caleb couldn’t stand to be away from his work. So each morning he woke up curled against Mollymauk, carefully untangled himself, and slipped off to man the bookstore and continue transcribing new spells from the spellbooks they’d gotten in the Empire and Southern Xhorhas. 

Research and quiet study was always his preference, but there was nothing like intense experience out in the world to get the arcane powers flowing. He was sure he could cast the stronger spells now, once he got them copied. But even with his memory and quick fingers, it would take fourteen hours to get each of the stronger ones copied to perfection.

Worth it, but definitely tedious.

And as much as Caleb would have loved to spend time inscribing those spells in Molly’s bedroom, he definitely couldn’t focus there. He could barely get an hour in before giving in and doing whatever Molly wanted to do. As lovely as that was, Caleb wanted to have these spells. Especially the better teleportation spell. The thought of being able to be wherever he wanted (or a reasonable distance away) in an instant, was very, very welcome. Even if he wasn’t running, he could take the time alone to think through a plan before coming back.

Caleb enjoyed having options, and this was a very good one.

He was also making some plans for the anniversary of his parents’ death. Plans beyond secluding himself somewhere and breaking down for twenty four hours. Without talking it over with Caduceus or Pumat he wasn’t entirely sure if his idea was a good one, but it seemed like it.

It was definitely a step forward from locking himself in his room and pretending to be sick. Beau always worried when he did anyways, and he didn’t want to worry Molly that way.

And it totally wasn’t spurred on by the fact that he had no room to lock himself in at Molly’s.

Honestly, there were many things that were pushing him in this direction. He was healing. He could lock himself in his study all day, but that didn’t feel right. He would just end up working all day. And he had the support of his friends. And the teleportation spell would be ready by then.

It was probably time to grieve properly.

He owed his parents that, at the very least.

And he owed it to his friends to try. They would want him to be happy.

He couldn’t tell him that he owed it to himself yet. But he could do it for them. His first family and his blessed second one.

So he was quite pleased to see Caduceus upstairs in the café, dropping off a crate of his tea to Veth and Jester.

“Hey, Caleb! Run out of coffee?” Jester asked, currently painting “Veth” over the “Nott” in the _Jester & Nott’s Divine Delights_ sign. She was doing a fantastic job on the wooden sign, but Caleb was only reminded of the many phallic signs she had spread across the city, instead of her raw talent.

“Oh, hello, Mr. Caleb,” Caduceus grinned, turning to him. “Maybe some tea instead? You look like you might want to take it easy on the caffeine.”

Caleb nodded. “I’m just here for some lunch, so tea would be lovely. Do you need a lunch break, Caduceus? I wanted to ask you something.”

“Of course, I don’t suppose you have something vegan back there?” he asked, turning back to Jester.

Veth pushed open the swinging back door to the little kitchen with her hip. “We always do! Or I can make something fresh for you- Caleb! You should have come back and said hi!”

He smiled at her, still not used to seeing her in the halfling body. Every time he saw her, it just filled him with pride. At least he’d gotten one thing right recently. Maybe a few other things, but those were less sure. This was perfect. “I just came up, Schatz. I wouldn’t have left without saying hello.”

“Good. You two go sit; we’ll make you something special!”

“No caffeine for our wizard, Veth, okay?” Caduceus put a hand on Caleb’s shoulder, and he noticed he was shaking just a bit. Whether that was from low blood sugar or the three cups of coffee was anyone’s guess. Transcribing spells, time had definitely gotten away from him. It was getting much later in the afternoon than was preferable for lunch, especially when he’d only eaten half a scone with his coffee that morning.

She just rolled her eyes and Caleb was tapped on the shoulder by a mage hand holding a basket of fresh rolls before they even made it to the corner table. The smell of fresh warm bread made his mouth water. Veth knew him well, and knew how to keep him well fed.

He started prying apart the bread to feel how warm it was on the inside, smiling softly at the aroma before passing the basket over to Caduceus.

The firbolg took one and smiled back calmly. “So what did you want to ask me?”

“I have some questions about plants. I want to plant something that would be relatively low maintenance, but bloom this time each year. Something native to the Empire, hopefully, that wouldn’t spread too much if it was only cared for once a year.” He picked at the roll in his hands, grateful for something to look at instead of making eye contact.

Caduceus hummed. “Any particular meanings you’re going for? There are lots of bulbs that would work well.”

“Ah, I hadn’t thought that much. Is there something traditional like that for grieving?” Caleb asked, taking a mouthful so Caduceus couldn’t ask any followup questions.

He hummed again, thinking and lacing his fingers together under his chin. “Well, there are all sorts of flowers people use for funerals. White is usually traditional, but people sometimes just order their loved one's favorite flowers. Where I grew up we always planted tea trees and other herbs over the graves. They’re definitely not native to certain parts of the Empire though. You might want to go with something sturdy, like a bush or shrub.”

“Do you know anything that would work well?” Caleb asked, sending Veth a little wave as the mage hand placed two cups of tea down in front of them.

Caduceus grabbed the cup and took a deep inhale, smelling the fresh blend with a lazy grin. “I know quite a few. Did you have a color in mind?”

Caleb thought back to his childhood home, the garden with the meticulously kept white roses. His mother kept just a small garden, but he remembered her spending hours pruning and taking off the dead blooms. He never understood them, covered in thorns and drawing blood if he wasn’t careful. But she loved them. She called them beautiful and accepted them, thorns and all.

“White would be good, I think.”

The mage hand dropped off their lunch then, Caduceus getting avocado toast on thick slabs of sourdough bread with hashbrowns, and Caleb getting something like eggs benedict. It was warm and filling, served on his favorite scones that they made that were filled with ham and cheese. He was pretty sure that Veth was still trying to fatten him up, but he _had_ forgotten to eat today. She was too good to him.

Caduceus was chewing slowly, thinking to himself. “The first thing that comes to mind are hydrangeas. They’re the flower of sympathy, but the white ones also mean purity and grace. That might be nice for starting over. I could get you some white tulips too; those bloom in spring for sure. Those mean forgiveness and respect.”

He took another bite of his food, chewing it methodically and focusing on the flavors across his tongue. Paprika, a little bit of lemon juice, some chopped parsley. Identifying each layer was meditative and kept the tears pricking at his eyes from falling.

_Forgiveness and respect._

Pushing down the feelings of regret and self loathing, all the little negative voices in his head, he said instead, “That sounds perfect.” He wished Frumpkin wasn’t asleep in his cat bed downstairs, and that people didn’t look at him funny when he brought the cat in the café. His familiar would be a comfort right now.

“I can order some for you, if you’d like. Or you could ask Yasha and Reani. They typically get cut flowers, but I’m sure they’d make an exception for you.” Caduceus took another long sip of his tea.

Caleb took a sip of his own, surprised by the hint of rose in the herbal blend. Maybe if the flowers were in bloom, he could bring some back for Caduceus. Maybe not everything had burned to the ground. He hadn’t ever been able to check. He asked after a moment, “Would you mind ordering them? I trust you know which ones would be right, and I’d rather not discuss this all twice.”

The firbolg nodded. “Of course, Mr. Caleb. I’d be happy to.”

He nodded back, letting the rose splash over his tongue. Molly would probably like this blend. Maybe he’d bring home a bag.

Nearly starting at a sudden touch, Caleb looked down to see Caduceus’s hand wrapped around his own on the table. “I’m proud of you, Caleb. This will be good for you.”

“Ah, I hope so,” he said into the teacup, letting the firbolg give his hand a small pat before pulling back.

Caleb sent a quick text to Molly to say that he’d be at the office late. When he didn’t answer, he just assumed that the tiefling had found something else to occupy himself with. He was good at that.

Then he closed himself in his office, hoping to transcribe the last of the “programmed illusion” spell before the night grew too long. Veth snuck downstairs on her way home and gave him a garden salad with chicken cut up on top while making him promise to head home within the hour.

He sighed deeply, but he could probably manage that. It was hard to eat and transcribe, especially when he had a deadline, but he had done worse. By the time he got on the subway, he was feeling emotionally a bit fragile, but otherwise fine. He’d finished the spell, his stomach was full of something besides old pastries and coffee, and he was on his way home, hopefully to cuddle with Molly.

But Caleb came home to a worried Yasha.

“Is something wrong?” he asked, taking off his coat.

“Molly… isn’t himself today. He hasn’t come out to eat yet. I saw him once earlier and he looked like a ghost.” She was finishing her own dinner, and she always ate quite late.

Caleb put down the rest of his things quickly. “Did something happen?”

“I think this just happens sometimes. Rarely, but I’ve seen it before, I’m pretty sure. It usually doesn’t last long. But I’m not exactly sure how to help, besides making sure he eats. He’s so different from us.” Yasha sighed softly and set her dishes in the sink.

He nodded, chewing his lip. “I will try my best.”

“Let me know if you need any backup. You look exhausted already,” she said.

“It honestly sounds easier to take care of both us than focusing on myself right now,” Caleb said with a shrug. He was good enough at taking care of other people. He knew all the right things to do for self care, it was just the issue of doing them for himself that he found difficult.

Yasha nodded, “You know where to find me.”

Caleb gave her a curt nod, already on the way to Molly’s room. When he knocked on the door and cracked it open, all the lights were off. "Mollymauk? Are you asleep?"

There was a lump in the bed that mumbled, “No.”

That didn’t look great. But he could do this. This was something he was actually good at.

“May I come in?”


	60. Numb

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Molly has a rough fucking day (or couple of days, really), and Caleb helps

### Chapter 60: Numb 

Molly wasn't expecting Marion and Gustav to give him time off. He'd told them some of the things that had happened just to help them understand why he might be a little on edge or distant. Neither of them quite understood why giving him a week off to "process everything" was a terrible idea. Hell, he couldn’t even explain it.

So he had a week to himself, while Caleb, Yasha, and the rest of the Mighty Nein threw themselves back into their lives like nothing happened.

The first day, Yasha and Caleb left for work early, so he slept in until noon, spending the rest of the time cleaning the apartment from head to toe. He even took down and laundered all his tapestries. By the time Yasha came home he latched onto her like a leech, practically begging her to make dinner with him. Luckily she could see it in his eyes, rubbing his back and agreeing to just about anything Molly proposed. It was nice to catch up with her one on one.

The next day he got out a fresh journal and his phone, playing all the albums Caleb had lost in the fire and hand translating them into Infernal a second time. His reading and writing had come ridiculously far with Caleb's help; he barely felt behind any of the others. Well, other than Beau and Caleb. He still wasn't a nerd. 

Caleb was working late at the bookstore, trying to make up for not being there for such a long time. Molly knew that, but it still stung that the man kept coming home exhausted and not in the mood to talk or do much else but sleep. They still cuddled, but he was starting to feel too isolated.

The third day he ran out of ideas for distractions. He caught up on all various forms of social media, television shows, anything he could find. He was emailing back and forth with Beau’s contact who had promised to put in a good word for him with the Lord of Whitestone, but he hadn’t messaged back in two days. Molly was going crazy. Things were going well, but way too slowly. In the end he sent a message to the contact from the Cobalt Soul Beau had given him and hoped they were better at emailing.

They weren’t.

The fourth day was hell. Molly was worried about leaving the apartment even for a walk, unable to get out of his head and trying to rationalize how it might help him. He knew it would, but he couldn't stop playing horrible scenarios in his head. Molly was far away from the bookstore, or the Lavish Chateau, or the Emporium, and he’d have to pay for the subway. Something awful might happen, and he was alone, and Yasha and Caleb and everyone else might never hear from him again.

Molly would end up back in a shallow grave with no one to remember him.

So he just didn't leave. For a while he scrolled on his phone, but even that felt hollow after everything he'd seen. He put the phone face down beside him on the bed, registering that it was vibrating softly from time to time.

People wanted to talk to him. That was nice.

Or it was just spam emails and calls.

He didn't have the energy to check.

When he thought too hard, he thought of slowly becoming petrified alone in the jungle and grave dirt in his fingernails and wraiths and ghosts and snakes and hags and gorgons and mage’s blood and goodbye letters and-

He stopped thinking.

The creeping numbness filled his body and he felt the world around him cease to mean anything. Emptiness filled him to the core and he was lost to the world other than the dull ache in his chest.

Molly was vaguely aware of time passing around him, but it was still a small surprise when he noticed the sun had gone down. There was a reason he noticed, but everything was a little hazy. He didn't remember falling asleep, but he didn't really remember doing anything else.

A soft knocking came at the door. "Mollymauk? Are you asleep?" Caleb asked.

"No," he mumbled, unsure if it was even loud enough to be heard. He curled around himself. He hadn't even brushed his teeth this morning. Honestly, he was surprised he’d made it to the bathroom at all. That was better than nothing, at least.

He should reach for the water bottle resting near his head.

He should invite Caleb in and ask him about his day.

He should do something.

He laid there while the door opened a sliver. "May I come in? Are you feeling well? Yasha said you never came out to get dinner," Caleb said, concern lacing his voice. It sent a pang of hurt straight through Molly's chest. There was a reason he tried not to do this. It hurt people. It hurt Gustav, and then Yasha, and now it would hurt Caleb.

He should tell Caleb to go away. But that might hurt him more.

"Sure."

"Are you… what's wrong?" Caleb asked, walking over to the bed, hand hovering just above Molly's shoulder.

Did he want to be touched? It was hard to tell. He usually wanted Caleb to touch him.

He'd been asked a question. "M'fine."

Caleb swallowed, worrying at his lip. "Did something happen?"

Molly almost laughed. Compared to the rollercoaster they'd been on recently, there was a significant lack of things happening. A compressed coil of emotion that had completely swarmed his brain and left him, well, empty. But again, he had to answer the question, and there was no way to articulate the mush in his brain without breaking down sobbing. So he said, "No."

"You're worrying me a bit, Mollymauk," Caleb murmured, his hand tracing Molly's cheek, feather light.

He didn’t want to do that. He knew he never wanted to worry Caleb. But he didn’t feel like he could move, or hold a coherent conversation.

He was trapped inside his head, and everything else felt like mush.

So all he could manage was, “Sorry.”

“No need to apologize. I just want to help.”

Molly hummed quietly. Caleb was too nice. It was impressive that he was still so kind after everything life had done to him. Gods, they were a mess.

He was usually better at keeping his pieces together. Of course it was rare that every distraction in his life disappeared at once.

Frumpkin was suddenly against his chest, kneading gently into the blankets and purring like a motor boat. It was a strange sensation, but grounding enough to make Molly feel a bit more coherent. Maybe he could ask Caleb to look after the cat tomorrow. But he couldn’t take Frumpkin away from Caleb. He’d never do that. His wizard needed the familiar.

Caleb had sat down next to him at some point, rubbing soft circles on his back. The tender motion almost made him break down on the spot. “What do you need? Food? A shower? A walk? We can watch that horrible fish show you like.” Caleb’s voice was calm and just a little bit teasing, soothing Molly’s frayed nerves.

 _“Catfish_ is a wonderful show. And are you offering to shower with me?” Molly mumbled, slowly feeling himself tether back down to earth. It was easier to feel grounded when Frumpkin was pressing him into the ground. Or bed. Close enough.

The beautiful pink blush played on Caleb’s cheeks, and it was the nicest thing Molly had seen all day. “I suppose I’m glad you’re well enough to tease me. I might really worry otherwise.”

Molly closed his eyes as Caleb ran his fingers through his hair, knowing it really hadn’t been that long since he showered. If he washed his face and brushed his teeth he’d probably feel fine.

Well, physically.

“Do you want to talk about it?” Caleb asked, still running his hands through Molly’s hair. 

The thought of trying to put his thoughts into words, trying to explain the overwhelming feeling of dread he had when he thought about everything that had happened to them over the past few weeks was overwhelming. How when he closed his eyes he saw blood slipping out of Caleb’s neck, between his fingers, blooming into his white shirt. How every shifting shadow made him jump out of his skin. How he felt like he was back wandering in the Empire, empty and terrified.

Even thinking about it, addressing that it was a problem beyond the numbness he’d given himself into, tears pricked at his eyes. 

“I’m not… I’m not sure I can yet,” he mumbled.

“Distractions for now, or something more?” Caleb asked, grabbing the water bottle off Molly’s bedside table and taking a small sip before offering it to him. It was casual, like he’d done it plenty of times before, though it was usually Molly sharing his drinks with him. Molly wasn’t sure if he was just being nice, or if he could really tell. He could probably tell.

Molly managed to prop himself up, feeling the shake in his limbs from not eating all day. He tried to drink the water without looking like it but probably wasn’t convincing Caleb. In reality he felt like he’d just stumbled out of the desert.

“Distractions. Please.”

Caleb nodded, though Molly could tell they would need to talk about it later. This wasn’t the kind of thing he would drop, even if he didn’t bring it up again for days.

Slowly Caleb got Molly upright, most of the normal dizziness staved off by the water and Caleb holding his arm. It was very disorienting to feel weaker than the wizard. He was supposed to be the one protecting Caleb.

Molly mumbled that he could probably make it to the bathroom without keeling over, and Caleb allowed him to go after placing a soft kiss on Molly's temple. In the other room he heard the distinct Zemnian accent ordering their favorite from the local Xhorhasian takeout place and the soft sound of the kettle whistling on the stove. It was strange to think that Caleb was so good at taking care of other people after failing to be good at taking care of himself. He knew everything he was supposed to do and ignored it.

Or assumed he didn’t deserve it.

Hopefully Molly was helping with that.

He had to get up and function so he could keep doing so. Beau needed help trying to take down Ikithon from the shadows, even if the people at the Cobalt Soul had welcomed her back with open arms when she showed up talking about corruption in the Cerberus Assembly. 

So he washed his face and brushed his teeth and even flossed before putting on a fresh pair of leggings and his crop top that said “speak of the devil.”

It was a start.

When he walked into the living room and saw Caleb creating a blanket nest with a cup of tea in Molly’s favorite “I’m a fucking delight” mug, he almost broke down. It was too sweet.

Of course Caleb misunderstood, moving over with a worried look on his face. “Is there something wrong? Should I have done something else? Did you want to go back in the bedroom?”

He shook his head quickly, moving to hug him. “Just… surprised. This is more than I was expecting, I guess.”

Caleb hugged him closer, mumbling into the crook of his neck. “I’m pretty good at this part, if I try.”

“You should try for yourself more,” Molly said, running his hand through his hair and trying to get as close as possible without knocking his horn into the wizard.

He looked like he was going to protest when there was a knock at the door, causing him to peel away instead and take in their food. At the very least, Molly saw that Caleb had made himself a cup of tea too.

Curled up on the pull out couch piled with a ridiculous amount of pillows and the mug of tea in hands, he almost felt back to normal, despite all the swirling anxieties in his head. Caleb was here, Yasha was home, everyone was safe and he could breathe. The tea was a warm grounding tether to reality and the fact that he probably wasn’t going to deal with anything that terrible for a long time.

Caleb moved in beside him with their favorites from the Xhorhasian restaurant and put on horrible reality television. The food helped him feel more like himself too. It was soft and domestic and so much more than Molly expected when he woke up this morning.

The swirling anxieties weren’t gone, but they were mollified for the most part. With the food gone Caleb ended up with Molly halfways in his lap, fingers carding through purple curls and almost lulling him to sleep if he wasn’t so enamored with the ridiculous television show.

“I know you don’t want to talk about it yet, but I just want to ask if I can help tomorrow? You could come to the bookstore, or I could take the day off and work from home, ” Caleb said, still running his hands through Molly’s hair.

He blinked. It was too much. It was too sweet. “I… You’d do that?”

“If you’d like me to, of course. Calianna and Fjord have already been allowing me to take fewer shifts at the bookstore. I’d probably be boring company since I’m still transcribing spells, but it might be better than nothing. Jester and Veth would probably love company upstairs too.”

Molly could feel the tears rolling down his cheeks onto the pillow in Caleb’s lap. “Maybe I could come with you. I think I’d like to not be alone.”

“Then you won’t be alone,” Caleb said, like it was the easiest thing in the world. Like Molly wasn’t a burden, or something to be forgotten. Like he really cared about Molly. Like caring about Molly was easy.

And Molly knew he was hopelessly in love with him, and he knew he couldn’t say anything. Not when he was still terrified to wake up and find the wizard gone, taken or missing with only a letter left behind. That was another conversation to have, one when he had something more to show with his efforts in taking down Ikithon. But he definitely wasn’t ever letting go of his wizard. Not when it could feel like this.


	61. Not Alone

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Caleb tries to distract Molly. Molly distracts Caleb.

### Chapter 61: Not Alone 

Caleb had taken it upon himself to be distracting for Mollymauk after the rough day yesterday. He’d guessed that the tiefling didn’t do well alone, or when bored or understimulated. Beau was similar, almost retreating in on herself when left to her own devices. He’d found her surrounded by notes and research with clear evidence that she hadn’t eaten in ages one too many times. 

It would make sense that Molly was similar, with two jobs and spending a lot of his free time with friends. Friends who were all suddenly extremely busy with everything they’d left behind for a weeklong vacation. If anything, Molly seemed _more_ extroverted than Beau, not really needing to recharge after hanging out with people. 

So Caleb had invited him to hang out at the bookstore while he worked. In the morning, Molly sat on the counter while Caleb worked the front desk and they talked about books, and their friends, and Frumpkin, and everything they could think of. He ran up and down stairs, talking with Veth and Jester and bringing Caleb cups of coffee while drinking things himself that seemed like more whipped cream than anything else. It was calm, but Caleb sold a few copies of Allura Vysoren’s new text that had come out that week. He set aside a copy for himself at the end of his shift and showed Mollymauk back into his study so he could get some research done. Molly assured Caleb that not being alone was enough of a distraction, and Caleb could do whatever he needed to get done.

But what was really happening, was that _Molly_ was distracting _Caleb._

Having the beautiful purple tiefling sprawled across his lap while he tried to transcribe a spell on the arm of the couch was not the ideal study environment. However, Caleb certainly wasn’t complaining. Not when Molly was tracing shapes on his thighs with his fingernail and gently running his tail over his upper arm and shoulder.

It was sending little electric shivers down his spine, but the tiefling in question was just doing it absentmindedly while playing some phone game. Caleb was quite good at focusing when necessary, and he was usually good at ignoring all outside stimuli. This was unprecedented.

And it was _fascinating._

A very different kind of research, but technically research all the same. Caleb was definitely a fan of research.

So instead of continuing his distracted attempts to transcribe the telekinesis spell he was working on, he grabbed a book Yussa wanted him to read before they worked together next week. It was in Elvish of course, so he had to cast a spell to be able to even read it for an hour. After the ten minute ritual to comprehend languages, he noticed Molly was staring up at him.

“Something wrong?” he asked, suddenly more self conscious.

Molly started, a little flush growing into a lovely plum color as he was caught staring. “I… I like watching you do magic.”

Caleb only smiled and filed that information away for later. He had research to do, in a couple senses of the word. In his lap, Molly was more than eager to ignore the issue and continue playing around on his phone. It didn’t take long for his fingers and tail to start tracing restless patterns once more.

That was what he was expecting. Caleb noted the patterns, but they didn’t seem to have any particular similarities, just little swirls and twirls that kept sending little shivers down his spine.

The next step was easy. He laced his fingers in Molly’s hair, stroking gently like he’d do for Frumpkin, who was currently purring around his neck. The reaction was almost instant, as Caleb watched Molly’s eyes flutter shut out of one eye, flipping to the next page. He stayed perfectly still, letting Caleb run his fingers through the purple curls with his eyes shut for three minutes and forty eight seconds.

Magic was good, and playing with the hair.

Then he went back to his phone, continuing to scroll through some social media app that Caleb had never bothered with, even though Molly had convinced him to make an instagram for Frumpkin. The cat in question hopped off Caleb’s shoulders and moved to the window sill, looking out. With Molly sufficiently distracted again, Caleb kept up his ministrations before switching to rub at the base of Molly’s horns. He’d brushed against them once or twice, but today he was moving more carefully, with more purpose.

Molly’s eyes slid shut again, but this time he nuzzled closer, just like a cat. But instead of purring he almost whimpered, a little whine in the back of his throat.

That was _very_ good to know. Horns were good. Caleb switched to the other horn, copying the movement and struggling to finish the paragraph he was reading while he did so. The tiefling in his lap squirmed into the touch again, the plum colored blush returning to his cheeks. Caleb was going to experiment with more pressure when the first squeeze caused Molly’s tail to thrash.

He caught it on instinct before it could smack him in the face and he heard a similar sound to when he’d grabbed Molly’s tail in Rumblecusp. A small groan escaped Molly’s lips and his phone fell down into a crack of the couch. The tiefling swore in Infernal and cracked an eye open to look up at him. “Are you teasing me on purpose?”

“Were you?” Caleb asked, raising a brow.

A smirk danced across Molly’s lips. “Maybe.”

“You’re very distracting, you know, Mollymauk,” he said softly, tracing his fingers over the spade of his tail and delighting in the responding shiver.

If there was one thing that Caleb learned while watching Molly fight, it was that he was _fast._ He barely had time to blink before Molly was straddling him, and his only reaction to being so startled was to hold the tail tighter.

Molly bit his lip on a choked sound and pinned Caleb’s hands up above his head. “I’m not sure it’s fair for you to study all my weak spots without me getting a chance.”

He licked his lips, trying and failing to slow his pulse. “Are you going to take that chance now?”

“Is that an invitation?” Molly asked with an eyebrow raised.

Caleb bit his lip, wishing he could move forward to kiss the ridiculous tiefling pinning him down. “Are you planning on letting me go?” he asked instead.

Molly smirked, “Do you want me to?”

Taking a deep breath, Caleb carefully shook his head no, not trusting his voice. A grin spread across Molly’s face as he dove lower, planting small kisses along his neck. Trying to smother the gasps in his throat, Caleb squirmed under Molly’s touch. “Let me know if you change your mind, okay?” Molly asked, breath tickling over the curve of Caleb’s neck.

He nodded, starting to speak when Molly began to suck a small mark into the pale flesh and twisted his words into an incomprehensible whimper. Caleb could feel Molly smile into his skin before continuing, pulling buttons open on his shirt and scattering more marks down across his neck and collar bone.

“Maybe I don’t have to look too hard to find your weak spots,” Molly teased, nipping at Caleb’s earlobe and eliciting another embarrassing sound. This was nothing like the fumbling he did with Astrid and Caleb was starting to feel far too undone. His rational mind was leaving and he was far more concerned with continuing this particular avenue of research.

“Maybe you should shut up and kiss me,” he mumbled, instead of telling him to slow down, or that the door didn’t lock, or that he really ought to be getting back to his actual research.

There would be time to think about all that later.

For now he could relish the teasing smirk that danced on Molly’s lips as he pulled back, “With pleasure.”

Molly released his arms, moving closer and winding his fingers in Caleb’s hair instead. As he leaned to nip at his lower lip, he tugged ever so gently, making Caleb gasp. He took full advantage and let his tongue push deeper, groaning as Caleb grabbed his horns.

Time to put some of the research to use.

Once again, Caleb lost track of time, unsure exactly when it stopped being 5:47 and started being 6:59. But he was very aware of the sound of the door knocking, shocking him into stopping and trying to cover how much Molly had undone of his shirt.

“Hey guys, Veth said I should bring you some dinner since Caleb forgets to eat-” Jester walked straight in, holding a big tray full of breakfast sandwiches and hashbrowns. “Oh my gosh, are you fucking in here?” she asked, eyes wide with a mischievous glow.

Molly smirked from his position on top of Caleb. “Not anymore, dear.”

“Caleb! You have so many lovebites!” she cooed, her smile so wide it looked like it would give her cheeks cramps.

Caleb was pretty sure his cheeks would never return to their normal color. He tried desperately to button up his shirt, looking gratefully to Molly who handed him his scarf. It was the starry sky one he’d given to him as a birthday present, soft and silky over his now well marked throat.

“Oh man, you two should really lock the door next time, what if Veth came down instead?” she asked, giggling as she placed the food down on the desk.

Molly laughed as Caleb groaned at the thought, covering his face with his hands. This was not what he was hoping for this afternoon. “You know the door down here doesn’t lock, Jester,” he mumbled. This wasn’t the first time he’d asked her to knock.

She just went on with her teasing, and Molly joined right in until she left. They ate quietly, watching videos that Molly pulled up on his phone, but the tiefling stayed in his lap even after he left to get the food. Before long the sun had set and they started packing up to head home.

It was rare for Caleb to spend the entire day with one person and not feel tired of their company. Having it be Mollymauk was lovely. He felt lighter, and he hoped Molly felt the same.

“Did you have a better day today?” Caleb asked, fumbling with his stack of books.

Molly grabbed half the books and put them under his arm so he could catch Caleb’s free hand. “Much.”

“I’m glad,” Caleb said, chewing his lip. “Did you want to talk about it?”

He sighed, letting the silence hang while his face screwed up in thought. “You know when… ah, what do you call them? Ways to cope? When they just… leave? There was so much all in one week, then nothing. I hadn’t really processed anything, and it just got too overwhelming.”

“Coping mechanisms. And yes, I’m familiar. I was lost without Frumpkin for a while. I’m sure Veth could tell you.” Caleb suppressed a small shudder and felt the cat nuzzle into his neck. He was just as happy to be back.

Molly nodded, “That’s sort of what happened. I should probably take some time to work through all that shit, but I kind of want some space from it first, if that makes sense? It’s all very… raw.”

“I understand,” Caleb said. “You know I’m here. Or I could set up an appointment with Pumat if you’d like. Or maybe you could use a journal, if you don’t want to talk to someone in person.”

He hummed, “The journal sounds nice. It’s hard to explain it properly to people.”

Caleb made a note to grab him one, but that could wait for another time.

For now, he really wanted to get into a room alone with Molly with a door that locked.


	62. Divine Delights and Disarray

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fluffy fluff fluff!!

### Chapter 62: Divine Delights and Disarray

_“Dear Diary” feels pretty cliché, but I feel like if I don’t address this to someone, it’ll feel weirder. Maybe dear journal? Journal, old buddy, old pal. Do I introduce myself? Do I just get right into it?_

_Can you tell I’ve never done this before?_

_Caleb and Caduceus told me to write down all my feelings in here after everything happened. I’m willing to try anything once, especially since my handwriting is shitty enough that no one would bother trying to decipher this bullshit anyways._

_So, hello...._

_Gods, this is so much harder than I thought it would be._

_Things are mostly back to normal now, since I started working again. A lot of the anxiety and numbness is gone. I feel pretty safe again. But I should deal with some of this crap. Probably._

_I wonder if he’ll read this. He’d probably respect my privacy. It’d be easier though._

_I love him and I’m terrified to say so and lose him._

“Mollymauk?” Caleb stuck his head in their now mostly shared bedroom. Molly really needed to start looking for apartments for the poor man. The wizard deserved his own space that wasn’t all the way uptown. But Molly didn’t want him to go.

He closed the little journal, sitting up more in his bed. “Yeah?”

“Veth said there’s some kind of emergency down at the bakery. I’ll be gone for a while I think. Do you need me to pick up anything on the way back?” he asked in a rush.

Molly shook his head. “I think we’re fine. We need groceries, but I can grab them. I should go out later anyway. Is everything okay?”

“I think so, she didn’t sound that stressed. If you need something, you can call.” Caleb nodded once, shifting a bit from foot to foot in the doorway with nervous energy.

“Go, go, save your halfling from whatever bullshit she’s gotten herself into now,” Molly said with a grin, darting up to kiss Caleb on the cheek before he left.

The redhead flushed that perfect pink and waved as he pulled his coat over his sweater and said his goodbyes. It was too warm for all those layers, but it seemed to be a comfort nonetheless. And Molly took great pride in knowing there were a lot of hickeys under that turtleneck. He heard the apartment door shut and he was left alone again.

Until he looked down and found Frumpkin twisting around his ankles.

“Huh,” he said, reaching down to pick up the little fey cat, “I guess he can’t really bring you into the café. It’s kind of a restaurant.”

Frumpkin started purring at the attention, settling into his arms like he belonged there. Molly hummed and bounced the cat around like you would an infant. “We should get you registered as an emotional support animal so he can take you everywhere. Can you do that with a magic cat? Or maybe we could set him up with one of those little cameras so he can watch you when he’s away. They make some that shoot out little treats remotely. Would you like that?”

The bengal made a small mrrp, as if he was answering the question.

“I never know how much you understand,” he murmured. “Do you just know that I asked a question? Or did you hear the word ‘treat’ and get excited?”

Frumpkin made another soft sound and started climbing up to boop his nose against Molly’s. He couldn't help laughing at the ridiculous display, but rerouted and started moving to the kitchen to grab the little bag of treats Caleb kept for the familiar. “Caleb created a menace telling you all the different ways to be cute.”

With Frumpkin mollified and full of treats in Molly’s lap, he crawled back into bed and stuck the journal away in the drawer of his bedside table. He’d try again later.

Molly took some time sifting through his emails. Frumpkin was mostly good, only splaying across the keyboard of his laptop for attention twice. He and Beau were going to the Cobalt Soul branch in Port Damali soon to talk about the corrupt Cerberus Assembly bullshit. They were still working out dates and times. Beau wanted to make sure that her mentor Dairon could be there, but they had a packed schedule.

Jester had been sending out massive group emails trying to connect everyone on a free day for Molly’s late birthday party. Even though he’d assured her that he’d waited this long, she was so eager he thought she might explode if they didn’t get it done within a week. She’d made a separate email chain with just Molly, Yasha, and Reani to talk about themes and flowers (one Yasha had muted almost immediately, after saying to call once they picked colors and that she’d do the arrangements as his present).

He was mostly just excited to see all his friends again, but the fact that it was all about him certainly wasn’t unwelcome.

Once he finished writing out an email about color schemes to Jester, his phone rang with an unknown number. He always answered his phone, even if he didn’t know the number. It could be important, or he could get the chance to make a telemarketer laugh, which was always a win.

“Hello?”

“Hello, Mr. Mollymauk. This is Calianna, from the bookstore?”

He frowned, “Hey, Calianna. Is everything okay?”

“Yes, well, I mean sort of. Veth told me to call you if Caleb needed help. He says he’s fine, but I think he’s a little overwhelmed.”

Molly was already in his coat, pounding at the elevator “down” button like it would drag the contraption up faster. “I’ll be right there.”

“Perfect! I’ve got to run, but we’ll see you soon!”

And then she hung up without explaining anything else.

Overwhelmed. What could that mean? Caleb had said there was some kind of emergency. But Calianna didn’t exactly sound worried, just a little distressed. Of course, she always sounded cheerful.

She’d probably at least mention it if there was real danger, right?

Molly was already in the lobby of his apartment building when he wished he’d grabbed his scimitar. Oh well. He’d made do with worse. At least the bakery would have some kitchen knives.

The subways were running on time, and one was pulling into the station right as Molly got down the stairs. A small blessing. Soon he was running up the stairs to the café, taking the steps two at a time and wondering what was going on, especially when the bookstore downstairs was shut with a “be back soon! :)” sign. Still too cheerful for him to really worry, but he wasn’t satisfied yet.

He wasn’t really sure what he was expecting.

Whatever it was, Molly really wasn’t expecting to see Caleb in a messy bun with an apron covered in flour, but there they were. Luckily he picked his jaw up off the floor before anyone saw, but the image would be seared into his brain forever.

Not that he was complaining.

The little dusting of flour was covering some of the freckles on his right cheek and a few strands of his hair had come loose to frame his face. He was busy taking orders from a massive line of customers, more than he’d seen from the shop since brunch on Mother’s Day when Veth almost had a breakdown over a broken espresso machine.

“Oh, Mr. Mollymauk! Thank goodness you're here. My lunch break is almost over and I can’t help Caleb anymore,” Calianna said, grinning at him with a tray full of empty plates and coffee cups. “Have you ever worked in a restaurant before?”

“No,” he said, still a bit breathless but starting to calm. Everything was fine. This was a normal emergency. Nothing was really on the line but their outfits. “I’m sure Caleb will teach me.”

“He memorized all the recipes and drinks before Veth left, but Luc’s home sick with some kind of stomach bug. Jester’s at some kind of appointment she said she couldn’t miss. Caleb would have been fine on his own if the chain coffee shop down the street didn’t have a water main burst, but it’s all closed down today. If you really need the girls you can call, but Caleb should be okay as long as he has another set of hands.” She sounded a little winded, and there was a little coffee stain on the cuff of her white shirt that peeked out of the gray sweater she was wearing.

“I can do that,” Molly said, nodding and accepting the apron. He wasn’t wearing white and he could probably manage to bus tables without dropping anything. Probably. He was dextrous enough. Maybe he’d even be good at it.

Caleb faltered while pouring coffee and almost spilled it as he saw Molly walking into the back room with Calianna. “Mollymauk?”

“Reinforcements, dear,” he said, resisting the urge to kiss his cheek on the way back to wash his hands and tie back his hair. It was long enough for it, so he could avoid the horror of a hairnet over horns.

Calianna gave him a quick rundown of where everything he needed was, handed him the apron and the tray, and disappeared back downstairs.

At first, it was a little harrowing. Molly was dodging disgruntled people who wanted coffee (only in a big city like Nicodranas would there be this many people who needed caffeine this late in the afternoon) as he took empty cups and plates off of tables. Caleb was still covered in flour, and it looked like it was only getting worse with every order.

But the café was cleared of dirty dishes pretty quickly, the dishwasher was filled, and Molly was able to take over working with the customers. From that point on they settled into an easy rhythm, with Caleb fulfilling the orders to the letter with all the memorized recipes in his head, and Molly bringing everything out and grabbing dirty dishes along the way. Occasionally Caleb would grab something in the back room while Molly was filling the dishwasher and he could sneak a kiss on the cheek as the wizard passed by, or just bump their hips together.

It was organized chaos, and Molly was very much enjoying the perfect balance they achieved as he learned exactly how much small talk to have with each customer to make them happy and give Caleb enough time to get ahead on orders. Most of the people were just grateful they’d found a coffee place within walking distance of the last one, and by the end of the day they were out of business cards. At least ten different people told Molly they’d be coming back instead of returning to the chain.

But they were pretty busy until the shop closed up, not allowing for much conversation between him and Caleb.

Caleb collapsed into one of the couches immediately after locking the door. “Guess I have to get you on the payroll. Were two jobs not enough?”

“Not at all,” Molly said, grinning and finally moving to brush the flour off Caleb’s cheek. “You know I don’t like to be bored. Also, that was fun.”

He raised a brow. “Really? I’m not sure we have the same definition of fun.”

“Spending my afternoon with you and getting to charm the pants off people who are socially obligated to be nice to me or I spit in their coffee? I’d say that’s pretty fun.” Molly grinned wide and pulled off his apron before depositing it on one of the tables.

Caleb laughed, still sounding winded, but happier. “Did you really spit in the coffee?”

“Only in the one who told me I should go back to the Nine Hells.”

“Gods, people are awful. I don’t know how you stand them,” Caleb groaned, rubbing his eyes.

Molly settled beside him and wrapped an arm around his shoulders. “Ah, a lot of ‘em are great. Didn’t you see the tip jar?”

“That’s because you’re unfairly attractive, not because people are inherently good,” Caleb mumbled, still rubbing his eyes with the heels of his hands.

Laughing, he nuzzled into Caleb’s neck. “Well, I’m glad you think my personality is so outshined by my killer looks.”

Caleb flushed then, struggling to say otherwise when Molly just rolled his eyes and kissed him. “C’mon, let’s clean up and get out of here. You look as tired as I feel.”

He nodded, moving to stand, and Molly couldn’t help but to pull him back in his lap and sneak one more kiss on his neck, right at the edge of the turtleneck. Caleb squirmed around in his lap, attempting a halfhearted glare, but it was too soft and it just made Molly grin. “You are insufferable.”

“Aw, you don’t look like you’re suffering because of me though,” Molly teased, biting his earlobe. “And it’s not my fault you look so cute in an apron.”

Caleb rolled his eyes and stood again, offering a hand to pull Molly up this time. “You’re completely ridiculous.”

The words tumbled out before Molly could stop them, “You love it.”

Blushing bright red, Caleb looked at him in surprise. There had been an unspoken agreement not to say that word. Molly was so casual saying he loved other people, it came out far too easily. But he’d never been in love like this. Molly almost (definitely) panicked, trying to force out an apology when Caleb held his hand tighter.

“Even if it’s hard to say… I do. Every ridiculous thing about you.”


	63. Happy Birthday, Take 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Self indulgent chapter describing the M9 in costumes lmao

### Chapter 63: Happy Birthday, Take 2 

Every once in a while, Jester liked to play dress up with her friends. And everyone loved her enough to go along with it.

Fjord, Molly, Yasha, and Caduceus hadn’t yet had the pleasure of being dragged to one of her costume parties. And she still insisted on throwing a huge birthday party for Molly since they had to celebrate the new chosen birthday on the road the first time. So that was one of the first things she planned when they got back, even though it took her a solid two weeks. Caleb wasn’t ecstatic about the costume she had planned, even if it involved him being able to hold Frumpkin all night.

"A wizard and a cat? Really?"

Jester grinned her too wide grin, "C'mon, Caleb, it's gonna be so cute!"

He was staring at the ensemble incredulously. "Where did you even get this?"

"Can you believe they sell Hallows Eve costumes super cheap in the springtime?" She twirled around, holding her own frilly skirt up to her body as if she was wearing it. 

He looked at hers, wondering if it was enchanted to be so riotously colorful, or if it was actually just that much of a bright rainbow on its own. Molly would like it. Hell, Molly would look good in it. He gulped at the thought of how much toned purple leg that would expose and tried to focus on the question. "Ja, I imagine they do. Did you get one for everyone?"

"Almost! Beau and Yasha are doing like a couple thing. I almost got a couples costume for you and Molly too, but I didn't want anyone to feel left out." She turned to the mirror, chewing her lip for a moment before regaining composure. Fjord still hadn't asked her out then. "Like I invited everyone, so I didn't want anyone to feel uncomfortable."

"Everyone?" Caleb asked, wondering how many people Jester thought she could cram in the _Lavish Chateau_. Probably too many for comfort. Definitely too many for Caleb to be okay with seeing him in the costume.

But Jester only grinned, confirming, "Everyone."

When Jester said everyone, she had really meant it. At least he seemed to know everyone. He wasn’t too sure about dressing as a cat otherwise. The costume Jester had forced him in (for Molly’s sake, she kept reminding him) had a fluffy top piece to cover up his book holsters, but the little black skirt exposed far much more of his legs than he was used to. Even when he wore skirts, he liked the ankle length plaid ones Veth had gotten him. This was... chilly. The magically added cat ears and tail were his own addition, but only because he couldn’t imagine wearing the tight headband that came with the silly costume. Frumpkin wasn’t happy at all in his little wizard robe and conical hat, but if Caleb had to suffer, so did he.

The _Lavish Chateau_ had been rented out for the night, aglow with soft lights, pulsing with music, and filled to the brim with over the top multicolored floral displays from Reani’s shop. Caleb saw the aasimar herself fiddling with the big pink flowers (stargazer lilies, if he remembered correctly, but it had been months since Yasha had pointed that one out) in the vase of one as he walked down the stairs from Jester’s room.

“Caleb! You’re so cute!” Reani squealed, stepping forward after sending a small pulse of natural energy into the flowers and making the last few blooms pop open. She was dressed up as Poison Ivy, covered in real vines. “May I?” she asked, reaching out her hand towards the magically summoned cat ears on his head.

He blinked, “Oh, ah, sure.”

It sent a shiver down his spine as she gave his ears a gentle rub. “Oh my gosh, these are so cute! I wonder if I could do something like that.”

“It wasn’t too difficult, if you’d like to take a look at my spellbook sometime,” he said, straightening back up and trying to shake off the tingly feeling.

She pursed her lips. “I don’t think my magic works like that, but thank you! I’ll ask Samliel later and let you know!”

“Of course,” Caleb nodded, perpetually confused about divine patrons and waving as she disappeared to fix another flower arrangement.

Calianna gave him a cheery wave, but was wrapped up in a conversation with Twiggy who was dressed as a mushroom, with what looked like a big umbrella repurposed as a hat. Calianna’s costume seemed to be split down the middle, with half of her looking like Chihiro and the dragon half made up to look like Haku from Spirited Away.

He saw the Pumats walking around in what he assumed were clone costumes from Star Wars. Fjord seemed like the best person to ask about confirmation, since his costume involved a lightsaber. At least Caleb was sure that those were from the sci-fi movies he’d never taken the time to watch. Though the conversation ended pretty quickly when it was clear that Caleb had no idea who Obi Wan Kenobi was, much less the 501st clone battalion. When asked about the movies, he usually told people he was more of a “fantasy nerd” than a “sci-fi nerd,” but really it was just because of how much it pissed off Beauregard that he’d never seen them. Not that he’d ever admit it, especially to her, but it was a matter of principle at this point.

The angry lesbian in question was currently blushing up a storm hooked around the arm of Yasha. She’d slicked her hair back and was wearing a leather jacket with the sleeves cut off, while Yasha wore a poodle skirt with her hair tied up in an uncharacteristic high ponytail, though the braids were still in place. She was letting the white grow back out again. It looked nice.

But he didn’t really want to hear Beau’s opinions about Star Wars, or how she would stammer with Yasha on her arm. At least they were doing things in public now instead of hiding in Molly and Yasha’s apartment.

Instead, he wandered to the front door, watching as Veth and Yeza walked in. They were dressed as Pokemon trainers and Luc was in a Pikachu onesie. Luc squealed when he saw Caleb, raising up his arms. “Uncle Caleb, you have ears!”

“I always have ears, Schatz,” he said, instructing Frumpkin to rest around his shoulders so he could pick up the halfling boy.

Veth rolled her eyes, “Don’t be a smartass to my child, Caleb.”

“Maybe we could not swear in front of Luc too?” Yeza said softly, adjusting the hat of his costume.

Luc just rolled his eyes and started petting Frumpkin under the chin. “I’m seven, dad; I know the word ass.”

“Well, your dad is right. It’s still not polite,” Veth said, kissing Yeza on the cheek. “But let’s leave Uncle Caleb alone for now, Luc. Jester said she was dying to see your costume!”

Luc looked over at Caleb with a pout, eyes bright and questioning. Caleb grinned and tilted his head so that Luc could pat the ears before setting him back down with a kiss on the forehead. “Make sure Jester gets lots of good pictures, eh Schatz?”

The little halfling boy grinned and nodded before running back to take Yeza’s hand. Veth grabbed and pulled on the end of his tail on her way past, gently but still sending a jolt through his body. She was unaffected by his glare, just winking as she took Luc’s other hand and went off to find Jester.

If that was how sensitive Molly’s tail felt, Caleb was going to have to take advantage more often.

Then Caleb headed over towards the bar, being manned by Carlos tonight, who was wearing a fake set of plastic vampire fangs as he poured drinks.

“I’ll take a beer, just whatever you have on tap,” Caleb said, not wanting to drink the Lavorres out of house and home. Not that he ever really could, but it felt polite, like tipping a few more coins than necessary to Carlos.

“Of course. You’re Beau’s friend, right?” he said, a slight lisp over the fangs.

Caleb raised a brow, “I am.”

“Could you tell her to stop hiding fireworks in the back? I’m worried the health inspector is going to call them a fire hazard at the point the pile’s growing,” he said, looking exasperated as he slid over the pint.

He snorted, “Will do, my friend.”

Caduceus and Pumat Prime found him then, waving for him to join them at the other end of the bar, back towards where Marion usually performed, though tonight the stage was filled with a massive cake. Its design was based off Molly’s favorite coat, maroon and piped with little colorful embellishments. Caleb already knew the insides were vibrantly purple since Jester had forced him to try exactly forty seven different iterations of the recipe. He was the only one who could remember each one with perfect clarity, but he wasn’t the best cook in the world. Following a recipe was easy. Ranking forty seven cakes was near impossible.

Luckily Caduceus had stepped in and helped Jester finish up the beatiful monstrosity. The firbolg seemed to have gone for comfort with his costume, appearing as some kind of gardener with his normal garden gloves, floppy hat, and apron full of tools. Yasha had stuck cut flowers in every pocket and fold so he looked like a walking floral arrangement.

“Those are some pretty nifty ears, there Caleb,” Caduceus said with a grin.

He looked up and made them wiggle. “Thank you. Made them myself.”

“Is that just an Alter Self spell, or some kind of cat potion?” Pumat asked, still pretty interested in the arcane, though he’d been a therapist much longer than a practicing enchanter these days.

Caleb explained the tweaks he’d been able to make to the polymorph spell to achieve the look happily with the firbolgs. It was easy to talk with them when he wasn’t really hiding anything. With a cold beer (Marion had spared no expense; it was a _very_ good beer) in his hands and no strangers at the party, he was very happy.

“You look real good, Mr. Caleb,” Caduceus said, always too good at reading people.

“I feel good,” he said, and he really meant it.

And then he saw Mollymauk walking down the stairs with Jester starting everyone clapping for him, since it was his birthday after all.

Caleb could see what had taken him the extra time, since he was in a full face of makeup and a red dress that seemed to be made more out of plunging cuts than actual fabric. The heels looked like hell to walk in even from where Caleb stood down the stairs, and the deep slits in the dress showed his stockings were held up by some kind of garter belt. Someone had helped him magically enhance his already long canine teeth so he looked more like whatever Elvira/Morticia/Vampiress he was dressed up as. Of course it all had his own flair, and his tattoos were proudly on display with his hair curled into a twist to one side to reveal the full peacock.

It was like the night he’d seen Molly perform here all those months ago, but now Caleb knew what those lips felt like upon his own. He couldn’t help but to wonder if the deep blood red lipstick would be sticky. He couldn’t help but to want to find out, though he could guess it would mark up his pale skin.

Then Molly winked at him, long eyelashes fluttering and dark.

Around him people cheered and whooped for Molly’s birthday, but Caleb was rendered speechless.

Reani ran up to him with huge antlers sprouting from her head, covered in vines and small flowers. “I did it! Thanks, Caleb!” she said, cheerfully clapping him on the shoulder.

He was far too distracted and the pint glass slipped from his fingers, crashing to the floor below and shattering. The whole while he couldn't tear his eyes away from Mollymauk.

_“Sheiße.”_


	64. Tails!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Molly enjoys his birthday presents ;)

### Chapter 64: Tails!

Molly wasn’t sure how Jester convinced Caleb to go along with this “cat and wizard” costume, but he was having the best birthday party ever. Of course, as Beau had pointed out when he said so, it was technically also the worst, since he’d only had the one. But he was having a wonderful enough time to be able to deal with her shit with a broad smile, and he didn’t have a care in the world. Other than desperately wondering if Caleb would purr if he could get ahold of those ears.

Then there was the fact that Caleb had literally broken a glass when he saw Molly. Pumat had done some spell to clean it up before Molly had even made it over to make sure Caleb hadn’t cut himself or something on all the broken glass, so he mostly got to hear Reani apologizing a million times.

“Ah, it’s… it’s quite alright. I was just distracted,” Caleb said, voice soft enough to almost be completely drowned out by the music. Molly almost asked by what just to tease, but it was clear. Caleb’s eyes hadn’t left him since he’d seen him at the top of the stairs, and it was very, _very_ nice.

Molly moved to hook his arm with Caleb’s, grinning to show off the pointier canines Jester had given him, courtesy of the Traveler. “Should we find a table? Jester told me I should sit somewhere so I can blow out a candle again.”

“Ja,” Caleb breathed, still staring a bit. The ears twitched and Molly realized on top of everything, Caleb had a _tail_ that was flicking back and forth like Frumpkin looking at a treat.

He never wanted this night to end.

Jester in her frilly, lolita-esque unicorn costume waved them over to a table set up closest to the stage. She’d carefully collected the Mighty Nein (plus Luc and Yeza) to sit at what had to be at least three of the normal tables pushed together. It looked more like a mad tea party than anything else, piled high with other sweets from the bakery and floral arrangements.

Although severely tempted to sit in Caleb’s lap, Molly had to be satisfied by just pulling Caleb’s chair as close as possible and letting Jester and Veth present him with a way too big slice of cake impaled with a ridiculous amount of candles.

“We don’t actually know how old you are, so we guessed,” Jester said as she set it down.

Veth nodded, “And Luc helped.”

The halfling boy was sitting on the tabletop nearby and had convinced “Uncle Caleb” to let Frumpkin sit in his lap, though the Bengal cat overflowed the small space and was starting to look completely fed up with the tiny wizard hat on his head. Luc was cooing, a perceptive child who took the hat off for the now grateful, purring cat.

“Caleb, could you,” Veth wiggled her fingers at the candles, “you know?”

“Hm?” he hummed, breaking his eyes away from Molly for the first time in what had to be like ten minutes. Not that Molly was counting. “Oh, ja,” he said, snapping and causing a small flame to appear on his pointer finger like a lighter. The flames crackled in the room and Jester snapped her fingers to turn off all the lights and make the fire burn bright purple.

They all sang, even those not at the table stopping their chatter to sing along. The party had devolved into more craziness than Molly had been expecting, and he was enjoying every second of it. He blew out the ridiculous amount of candles, casting the room in darkness.

“What did you wish for, Molly?” Jester asked, eyes bright as she waved her hand and turned all the lights back on.

Beau rolled eyes, “He can’t tell you, Jess. That ruins the whole point of the thing.”

“Yeah! It won’t come true unless you keep it a secret!” Luc said earnestly.

Molly grinned, “Don’t worry, I won’t tell anyone. I really want this one to come true.”

Jester pouted but began to pile gift after gift in front of him. Somehow Veth had given him the entire line of tiefling specific makeup he and Jester had been obsessed with. He was very skeptical of how much of her money she spent on the collection, but he definitely wasn’t complaining. The people at the makeup store were all snooty assholes who asked who he was buying makeup for anyways.

Beau had somehow acquired an entire cask of her parents highest quality wine, and if the shit eating grin on her face told him anything, she definitely didn’t get it legally. It tasted all the sweeter for it, and Yeza took that moment to wish Molly a happy birthday and slip out with Luc. Probably best for him to not see every adult he knew getting shitfaced, but Molly would miss the quiet, scruffy halfling and the cute little kid. However that meant Frumpkin was back in his little hat and curled around a slightly drunk Caleb. A sight worth saving forever in his memory. He whispered in a _very_ drunk Veth’s ear to ask her to snipe some good candid shots of them all and handed her his phone. Undoubtedly she would unlock it and look at everything, but he had nothing to hide. It might actually help her to trust him more.

Fjord, Caduceus, and Yasha had gotten together to give him a rare orchid that was exactly the red color of his eyes. Yasha had already snuck his phone and put in reminders of when exactly he was supposed to water it, and Caduceus had given him a little card of dates when the firbolg would come over with fertilizer and a bigger pot if necessary to help him keep it alive. Fjord just looked pleased to have been included.

The gifts and givers melded together until he was surrounded in a pile of new ostentatious clothing, gift cards to craft stores and places for even more ostentatious clothing, and a bunch of new little trinkets and charms for his horns.

Caleb went last, handing him a small card.

Knowing him, it could be anything. Molly remembered the Renaissance Faire, the circus, every cute thing they’d done under the guise of learning Infernal, and he could hardly wait to open it.

As soon as he saw the name on the card he almost dropped the damn thing. “Wait, really?”

“I know you appreciate his work, so I was able to pull a few strings, and…”

“Orly’s like the most booked out tattoo artist in Nicodranas! He spends so much time on his boat, it’s impossible to get a session with him without waiting for years! How did you even…?”

Jester was curled around the back of Caleb’s seat, grinning wide. “Caleb knows people! Especially me! And people will do a lot to get on my mom’s good side,” she said, ruffling Caleb’s hair and catching the ears. His eyes slid closed at the movement, moving into the touch.

Fucking adorable.

“This is insane, Caleb,” Molly said, unable to keep a smile off his face.

He shrugged as Jester stopped petting his head, going back to seriousness. “You said you wanted a new tattoo. I just saw which tattoo artist you liked the most pictures of online. Just research.”

“You’re too cute.” He beamed, unable to help himself from kissing Caleb on the cheek and leaving a red mark there.

Oh.

He wanted to do that again.

He wanted to see that mark _everywhere._

Molly tucked the card safely in the pile of presents that Caduceus was watching like a hawk after he saw Veth trying to pocket one of the shiny trinkets.

“Oh, Molly! Your fangs!” Jester exclaimed, rushing over and casting her spell again. He hadn’t even noticed the spell fading, but he certainly felt the incisors grow again. “I totally didn’t realize it’s already been an hour!”

Caleb nodded, “I’ll need to recast mine soon.”

“So yours only lasts an hour too?” Molly asked, cocking his head.

He nodded back at him. “Ja, it’s an alteration of a spell Jester and I know. The one that you and Fjord got to see when we figured out Veth’s spell.”

“Oh, the one that made Fjord a duck?” Molly asked with a grin.

Caleb smiled, “That’s the one. Jester asked me to make a variation where you would only retain part of the animal characteristics. I’m not sure what animal she took the fangs from, but it’s quite well done. I would have done less research today, but Yussa needed me. So I can’t cast it again today.”

“Why thank you,” Molly preened, leaning towards Caleb to grab the envelope again. He had a plan, and apparently he had to execute it within the hour. “I’m going to put this upstairs with my things, so it’s safe. Join me? Last time I left you alone you broke a glass, wouldn’t want that happening again.” He winked.

The pink flush he loved so much bloomed under Caleb’s cheeks. “I highly doubt that would happen without you here.”

Molly couldn’t help the smirk on his face, showing off his new fangs again. “Good. Does that mean you’re staying here though?”

The wizard rolled his eyes and stood up. Molly grinned and grabbed his hand to lead them upstairs. He had to rein himself in so he didn’t just throw the envelope once the two of them were alone and see how it felt to kiss with fangs. To see how Caleb looked covered in lipstick marks.

There were quite a few things Molly wanted to try, and he had an hour to fit them all in.

So he didn’t waste any time before, gently, but not so socially, pinning Caleb to the wall and cupping his cheek to lean down and kiss him. His wizard melted into it, wrapping his arms around Molly’s waist and pulling him closer while his tongue started to explore the new points in Molly’s mouth. Grinning into the kiss, Molly nipped at Caleb’s lower lip and swallowed the small gasp.

He moved the hand on Caleb’s cheek to tangle in his hair, and then to rub at the ears, eliciting a groan. Not quite what he wanted, but Molly was determined to wring out every sound he could.

His other hand ghosted up Caleb’s bare thigh, just along the outside but still causing a new kind of whimper. Molly moved to make a hickey with his new fangs, and he could feel Caleb biting his hand to stay quiet as the mark was made.

Then he found the tail and Caleb shuddered underneath him.

 _“Molly,”_ he groaned, head falling back and giving Molly more access to the pale skin of his neck.

“See what you do to me when you grab my tail, dear?” Molly asked, grinning over the deep bruise now sitting above Caleb’s collarbone.

A low stream of Zemnian swears (Molly assumed) left Caleb’s mouth as he lost almost all coherence. Molly didn’t stop, just continuing to explore the new appendages to his heart’s content. If Caleb’s present hadn’t been so wonderful, this might have been his favorite present to date.

Then, Molly’s wish came true. A low rumbling purr left Caleb’s chest as Molly found the sweet spot on the ears and he pulled back with a wide grin. “You are the cutest damn thing ever. You should give yourself ears every day.”

“That would take a lot of energy, when I know you’re more than willing to make out with me regardless,” Caleb said, rolling his eyes though looking a bit breathless. And the rumbling didn’t stop, so Molly could watch his eyes roll back and close in pleasure.

“But now you know what it likes to be Frumpkin!” Molly grinned, peppering kisses down Caleb’s neck.

“Please don’t make out with my cat.”

Molly snorted. “Why would I kiss Frumpkin when I could kiss you?”

“I don’t know, but don’t stop.”

“How much time do we have?” Molly asked, cocking his head and pulling up an innocent look.

Caleb had to think for a minute, which made Molly preen. He never lost track of time. “Seventeen minutes now.”

“Let’s make them count.”


	65. The Letter

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Molly confronts Caleb about the dropped letter back in the Hag's swamp

### Chapter 65: The Letter 

“Caleb, we need to talk.”

Molly’s words sent a bolt of panic through Caleb’s chest. That was what people said when they wanted to end things. He’d finally decided Caleb was too much, finally realized Caleb was a monster. This was it. He would have to accept it and move on. Molly just took his silence as an answer and went on.

“I’ve been working through it all in the journal you gave me, and I can deal with most of it. But there’s one thing we really need to talk about. Why the hell did you give up with those Scourgers back in the hag’s swamp?” he asked, his face stony.

That wasn’t what Caleb was expecting at all. A frown covered his features, “I… What? What are you talking about?”

“I saw you trying to fight them off, then I saw you give up and drop this note.” In Molly’s lavender fingers was the note Caleb had written all those nights ago when he’d first seen the Volstrucker. He knew what it said well, even if he didn’t have a perfect memory, since he had an amended copy in his pocket as they spoke. But he thought that particular one had gotten lost in the waters of the swamp in the subsequent battle.

> _Mollymauk,_
> 
> _Please do not try to follow me. It’s not safe. I cherish you and our friends too much to allow you to get hurt or killed over this._
> 
> _I care for you deeply, endlessly._
> 
> _Yours,  
>  C.W._

The new note had a few changes, but Caleb thankfully hadn’t needed it yet. He just stared at it for a moment, unable to say anything.

“Did you really think we would just give up and leave you with them? That we wouldn’t try to get you back?”

Caleb’s jaw shifted as he steeled himself. Mollymauk wouldn’t understand this part of his life. All he could do was try to do his best to explain.

“They would kill you. I cannot allow that to happen.”

Running a hand through his hair, Molly’s stony expression shifted into exasperation and worry. “You can’t stop us from trying to protect you. You can’t just expect us to sacrifice you.”

Caleb shook his head, “It’s not really a sacrifice when all they want is me. And I would do it again in a heartbeat. For you, for Nott, for any one of our friends. I want to keep them safe.”

“Can you at least pretend to have some sense of self preservation?” Molly snapped and real anger tinged his voice.

Caleb spoke softly, keeping his tone calm and measured. Anything to make Molly see reason. He couldn’t budge on this, and he didn’t want it to wedge them apart. They were safe now. They should be fine. At least for a while. “I used to. That was selfish of me. I wanted to stay alive until I got revenge, and I still do. But any of your lives would be worth more than mine. I can’t let them take you down with me.”

A ragged sigh left Molly’s chest and the tiefling just stared at him a long moment before dragging him into a crushing hug. Squeezing the air out of Caleb’s lungs, Molly mumbled, “Someday… Someday I’m going to bring that bastard down for you, in a way that leaves everyone safe.”

Caleb couldn’t really believe Molly cared for him this much. He knew his gut feeling, that he didn’t deserve it, shouldn’t be what he focused on right now. So he focused instead on how Molly was holding him tight, how Molly cared enough about him to value his life so much, how warm and cared for he felt.

Basking in the overwhelming amount of affection, he slowly lifted his arms to complete the embrace. “I would like very much to help you, if you figure that one out.”

“Well, Beau and I have been working a little. We’ve actually taken the train once or twice to Port Damali to research at the Cobalt Reserve there. She still has friends there. Powerful friends. Friends who are starting to make a difference, talking to the right people and stuff.” Molly pulled back, leaving an arm over his shoulders, but pulling the both of them to sit on the couch.

Fear crept back in then, insidious and slow. “You have… been pursuing this for some time now?”

“Since the night in the bar,” Molly answered.

Caleb felt the warmth seeping from his body. “That is a lot of danger you are putting yourself in.” A lot of danger for Caleb’s sake. He never asked for that. He didn’t want that. 

He could feel Molly sigh more than see it. “Any more danger than sitting next to you?”

Swallowing, Caleb had to admit in a small, fearful voice, “No, probably not.” 

“You don’t have to do anything if you don’t want to. But if you could come in and tell some of your story…” Molly trailed off, running his fingers through Caleb’s hair. “Only what you feel comfortable saying. And just to like, one person. I could even sit with you. But if you could give some kind of testimony, they might be able to get more resources. They trust Beau, but they have asked about how she knows all this.”

“You haven’t told them about me?” Caleb asked, frowning.

“We haven’t really needed to yet. They took some of the information we gave them, mostly about the crystals, and got in contact with the people who export refined Residuum. They had no idea about those experiments, and the Lord of Whitestone is _pissed._ That’s all we’ve been looking into so far, but I’m sure anything you’d be willing to say would help.” Molly kept running his hands through Caleb’s hair, allowing the man to rest his head on his shoulder. Caleb was grateful for the lack of eye contact, needing a moment to think.

The Cobalt Soul wanted to take down Ikithon. They had their own reasons, the old wizard being a powerful member of the Assembly they so hated, but that wasn’t a bad thing. It was good for them to be so motivated. He should help.

He would, though he knew telling his story to a stranger would probably make him sick.

After a few minutes of silence he said, “Can… Can Beauregard set it up?”

“Really?” Molly pulled back, looking at him. “You don’t have to feel obligated. I think we can get there on our own. Maybe slower, but,” he shrugged, looking like it really wouldn’t matter.

As if it didn’t matter that there were children going through what he did right now.

Caleb shook his head quickly. “I… I would like to help. I’ll do all that I can. If that means going with Beau to Port Damali or wherever, I will. I’ve given up on revenge. But… no one else should suffer.”

“I’m not sure I’ve quite given up on the revenge aspect,” Molly mumbled, kissing the crown of Caleb’s head. “Not that I don’t think it’s commendable and all that stuff. But I’ll never forgive that man.”

“I said nothing of forgiveness. I hope he burns beside me in hell. Or whatever happens when bastards like us die.” Caleb couldn’t keep the venom out of his voice.

Molly sighed, moving his hand to rub small circles in Caleb’s back. “I’d much rather you keep doing good and end up wherever I’m going. I’m no saint, but I don’t think either of us are really on Ikithon’s level. There’s something next level about coercing children who trust you completely to do your murdering and torture for you.”

“I suppose.” 

It did make sense that Ikithon was worse than he was. If anything made sense, it should be that. A monster’s creator was typically worse than the monster, if he’d learned anything from all the horror movies Beau had made him watch.

He did feel a pang of guilt for Molly getting wrapped up in all this. This was the kind of thing that Beau thrived on, and she was good under pressure and up against magic users. Ikithon would underestimate her and she would be fine.

But Molly.

He was dealing with all this just for Caleb’s sake. Caleb couldn’t help but to feel guilty for it. Dealing with all this wasn’t what Mollymauk deserved. He deserved far better, especially when the only reward was more time spent with a monster like himself.

“What’s going on in that big head of yours? I can hear the gears turning from here.”

Dragged out of the spiral, Caleb blinked. “Ah… nothing great. Perhaps we could do something else for a while? I know we’ll need to talk more, but this has already been, well, a lot.”

“Of course! Do you want to go somewhere? Or just have a night in? We could invite people over if you want.”

He blinked. “I… yes. That sounds nice. I might text Veth.”

“I can go see if Yasha and Beau will watch a movie with us or something.”

>   
>  **Caleb:** Hallo, Veth.  
>  **Caleb:** Are you busy this evening?
> 
> **Veth:** no  
>  **Veth:** r u ok?  
>  **Veth:** r u safe?  
>  **Veth:** need me to come over?  
>  **Veth:** need me to kill someone for you?
> 
> **Caleb:** No  
>  **Caleb:** Not today. I am fine.  
>  **Caleb:** Would you like to come watch a movie?
> 
> **Veth:** just us?
> 
> **Caleb:** I believe Molly, Beau, and Yasha will join us.
> 
> **Veth:** so u wanna make molly 3rd wheel it?
> 
> **Caleb:** I’d like to see some of my friends in a small, quiet group.  
>  **Caleb:** Also that would be five wheels, and a perfectly reasonable vehicle.  
>  **Caleb:** And Molly has as much claim over me as you do, these days. Especially since he actually wants to be with me romantically and has no husband.
> 
> **Veth:** i call ur lap
> 
> **Caleb:** Fine, Schatz.  
> 

He smiled at his phone, some of the unpleasant weight already leaving his shoulders with the idea of a quiet movie night. People often misunderstood his relationship with Veth, unfortunately even Yeza on occasion, but it was just a deep camaraderie that at this point felt more like platonic soulmates than anything else. Caleb hadn’t ever felt more than sisterly affection for her, but it was misinterpreted too much.

Mollymauk was the first person Caleb had been attracted to and done anything about it since Astrid. Having Veth around was knowing there was someone who would have his back, through anything. He was starting to feel the same for all of their small band, but if she hadn’t given up on him after nine years, she probably never would.

“We’re watching Crimson Peak and Pan’s Labyrinth because it’s a crime you haven’t seen them yet and since Fjord and Jester aren’t here we can watch horror movies,” Beau said matter of factly, pulling a beer out of the fridge and tossing it to him.

Caleb wasn’t ready for that, and he felt a small seed of acceptance take root in his gut as he prepared to drop the second beer in a week all over his feet. The condensation on the bottle had it slipping through his fingers while Beau’s eyes widened and she swore.

But there was no shatter.

“Maybe just hand it to him next time, dear,” Molly said, bottle miraculously in hand as he walked passed Beau to pat her on the head and smash the bottle cap off on the counter before handing it back to Caleb.

She rolled her eyes. “How can you disintegrate giant monsters and teleport anywhere in the world, but you can’t catch a fucking beer? You need to come with me to the gym some time.”

“I’d really rather not watch you and Yasha stare at each other in aroused silence for an hour or however long it is you torture yourselves each day,” Caleb said, grabbing a bowl and starting to make popcorn.

Beau turned bright red and began to stammer out a response when Yasha appeared and kissed the crown of her head. “Cheese pizza? Or something with toppings?”

“Is Veth coming? We’ll need two if she is,” Beau said, calmed just by the presence of the towering woman these days. It was much better than the embarrassed stuttering, in Caleb’s opinion.

He was left in peace to make the popcorn until Beau reappeared back in the kitchen. “Um, so I know I already picked the movies, but I just wanted to ask… I mean it’s kind of spoilery, but there’s some dead parents in them. Nothing to do with fire, but I wanted to check.”

“I should be fine, danke.” Caleb smiled at the quiet conversation over the popping kernels in the microwave.

She nodded, “‘Course, dude. I’ll like, cough or something when it’s about to happen so you can look away if you want.”

“Thank you, Beauregard.” He squeezed her shoulder.

Cracking a smile she said, “Anytime, man. And I’m proud of you. Dairon will probably text me back tomorrow, but I’ll keep you posted.”

Caleb smiled back as she left the kitchen, taking a deep breath before pulling out the popcorn. He could do this. He’d have his friends alongside him the whole way, and he could do this. Settled with Molly’s arm around his shoulders and Veth in his lap, holding his hand when a small bug screamed as it was burned alive, he knew that he could manage.

He could make sure no one got hurt by Ikithon again.


	66. Apartment Hunting

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Molly finally drags Caleb apartment hunting, but there's a reason the wizard has been avoiding it...

### Chapter 66: Apartment Hunting 

Molly had finally dragged Caleb apartment hunting, and they had found a very cute place near the bookstore that would be perfect. Beau had practically moved in with Yasha, and Molly could see how Caleb was getting uncomfortable with the amount of people now sharing the small space, even if he loved them all enough to stay quiet. He’d been on edge since they went to Port Damali and talked with Dairon, and if Molly had to watch Caleb drop something else because Beau walked around the apartment like she was a ghost, he was going to pick a fight with the monk.

No one wanted that, except maybe Beau.

It had taken ages to find a decent place that wasn’t far away from the bookstore and asking for hundreds of gold a month. But Molly had joined a bunch of different housing groups on all his social media accounts and had been scouring them for weeks. This place had fallen in his lap like a miracle. A five minute walk from the bookstore, pet friendly, completely renovated with modern appliances just two years ago, and most importantly, a steal. Caleb would be able to get the two bedroom space for the price of a crummy studio apartment downtown.

Caleb hadn’t taken much convincing to arrange a showing, and now they were standing in the space with the realtor finishing the tour back in the living area with an attached kitchen. It was clean, didn’t smell, and had big windows. Hells, it had a fucking _balcony._ It was perfect, as far as Molly could tell.

“And this is the kitchen! It has a full size electric stove, dishwasher, and fridge. Everything was updated just two years ago by the owners. Over there, they put in a washer and dryer in that closet during the renovation, which is _so_ nice to have on site. Oh, and there’s a magical failsafe enchanted throughout the apartment, but strongest here in the kitchen and in the bedrooms, to prevent damage from things like earthquakes or house fires. Much safer, and more specialized than sprinklers.”

Molly let out a low whistle, “Damn. I didn’t even know that was an option.”

“The owners are very proud of this property and how well it does during disasters. It’s top rated in its field for safety,” she said, beaming as she could see the change in Caleb’s face at that.

He stepped closer, finally looking truly interested, “Could I see the sigils? Are they housed in the apartment, or somewhere else?”

“Ah, interested in the arcane?” Her eyes sparkled. “There’s a central location for the enchantment in each apartment, right inside the fuse box. I know some people with kids or cats,” she looked pointedly at Frumpkin who was curled around Caleb’s shoulders, “like to ask the building supervisor to change or enhance the enchantment to help prevent things like furniture falling over, or causing the cupboards to unlock with a command word.” Earlier she’d tried to pet Frumpkin but had seen the grimace on Caleb’s face and quickly diverted the action into a rather awkward wave to the cat while reserving all physical touches for Molly. It was clear she was used to trying to build a rapport with potential buyers by patting them on the arm, but that was definitely not going to sell this place for Caleb. She seemed quite happy to have piqued his interest.

Caleb allowed her to lead them back to the fuse box she’d pointed out in passing when they first peeked in the hall closet. At the moment, Molly had mostly been concerned with how big the closet was, not the little metal box that Caleb was now opening and inspecting. It did thrum with magic, if spending time with Caleb had taught Molly anything. Of course a glowing crystal usually was magic.

“This is fascinating,” Caleb mumbled, fingertips tracing over the runes carved into the metal as his eyes lit up in a spell, presumably to identify the specific enchantments made. “Would I be allowed to add extra layers of protection on my own? I’m quite adept with the arcane; I wouldn’t need to bother the owners.”

“Absolutely! I think you’d need to run it by them, but anyone who works at Tidepeak Tower is probably more than welcome to tweak the spell. You’re likely more qualified than whoever they got to do it in the first place!” she said, laying it on a little thick as she looked back at the simple application Molly had filled out for him on her clipboard. Caleb shrunk a bit under the praise, ears turning red and Frumpkin picking up the pace purring around his neck.

Molly saved him from having to answer that, “This is very cool. Is this common in newer buildings?”

She launched into a story about the development of such technology, allowing Caleb to ask a few extra questions even though it sounded like she had just memorized it all off a webpage. Molly had to bail _her_ out then, sparing her from the increasingly difficult questions on acrana, “Well, it is lovely to know how safe it is.”

The realtor was grinning, wide, clearly aware of what a steal this listing was. “I’m sure you two will be very happy here.”

He could see Caleb blanch at that beside him. Molly, not wanting him to be uncomfortable, said, “Oh, we’re not moving in together. He’s actually moving out.”

The elven woman thankfully was good at her job and didn’t miss a beat, “Of course! It’s always important to have your own space!”

Molly nodded, but Caleb was suddenly busy looking at the serial number of the fridge. “Could we take a look at the paperwork for a moment?” he asked, barely sparing her a solid glance. He’d been looking at every little nook and cranny, picking the place apart. Only the enchantment had really caught his attention, though access to a fitness room and pool probably weren’t the perks that Caleb was concerned about. Molly couldn’t quite tell if it was a strategy for price negotiation or if he really hated the place.

She nodded, “Take all the time you need.”

“Danke schön,” he said, grabbing the packet of information and walking with Molly trailing behind into one of the two bedrooms. Distracted, he looked at the windowsill, probably looking for something that would indicate mold or drafts. 

Molly just wasn’t sure why he’d sent the realtor away. “Everything okay, love?”

“This place is very nice,” Caleb said, not meeting his eyes.

Molly nodded, stepping over to look at the window sill too. He saw no reason for concern, though he probably didn’t have as discerning an eye. “It’s perfect. In your price range and everything. I love the exposed brick in the living room.”

He was just staring at the papers in front of the window, quiet.

“Caleb, what’s wrong?” Molly moved closer, putting a hand on Caleb’s elbow and trying to figure out what was going on. He’d been quiet since they’d started the tour, which wasn’t abnormal when they were around new people, but something seemed off.

He shook his head, “It’s silly.”

“No, it’s not. Not if it’s what you’re feeling,” Molly shook his head and took a half step forward.

Caleb bit his lip and Molly brushed his thumb against it so he wouldn’t hurt himself. “I feel that it will be rather lonely. After so much time with… everyone.”

“Oh,” Molly blinked, “I just thought that… I mean it’s not like I’m kicking you out, if you don’t want to go, you’re more than welcome to stay. I just thought you were kind of… cramped. Since Beau is over all the time. You don’t even have a door that locks over there, and I know Frumpkin hates Yasha’s dog-”

“It will just be different. I’ve had roommates since I met Nott.” Caleb’s voice was quiet, as he started staring down at the papers again.

“Well, I mean I’ll be over here all the time. It’ll probably be hard to get rid of me, honestly, since it’s so much closer to the _Emporium-”_

“What if I don’t want to get rid of you?” he asked, meeting his eyes for once. Molly had been treading lightly after they’d visited Port Damali and Caleb had gone through Dairon’s interrogation. He was jumpier, startled by touches he’d once been comforted by, like he thought something was out to get him. But right now, he just looked scared.

Molly couldn’t take it. The papers flew to the ground as he caught Caleb in a hug. “Then I won’t go. You know that.”

“But you don’t want to live with me anymore. That would defeat the purpose.” Caleb’s voice was half smothered by Molly’s coat, but he still wanted to pull him closer. He wouldn’t, if the man didn’t want him to, but he could feel Caleb’s arms slinking around his back and tentatively holding him back.

“I never said that, gods, Caleb, is that what you really thought?” he mumbled, pulling them closer together to the point where he never wanted to let go. “I want you to have your own space and a bathroom that you don’t share with two lesbians that hog it for shower sex.”

A strange strangled noise escaped his lips, “Is that what they’re doing in there- actually don’t tell me, bitte.”

Molly laughed, kissing Caleb’s cheek. “Why? Jealous? We can totally-”

“That is not the point. They are like my sisters.” Caleb’s face had changed slightly from being scared to being horrified and Molly couldn’t help but laugh as he pulled back.

“I’m not kicking you out, Caleb. And really, I think we’ll probably keep spending the night together, unless you need a night to yourself. I just want you to have the option. This place is amazing, and you deserve to start making a home again.” Molly rubbed Caleb’s cheek, frowning as his features shifted once again.

Caleb looked far too melancholy. “My home is with the Mighty Nein. Not a building.”

“As much as I’d love to get everyone together in a commune, I’m not sure that would be the best place for Luc to grow up.” Molly’s tail had found its way around Caleb’s thigh, trying to pull them closer still.

He nodded, “I know. After so much time together, it will still be strange being alone.”

“You only have to be alone if you want to,” Molly insisted. “Nott will probably be here all the time to get a break from parenting, and once Jester finds out you have a whole new place to decorate she’ll invite herself over too. It’s so much closer to the _Emporium_ too, so unless you throw me out I’ll be sleeping here most nights.”

Caleb bit his lip again, moving to hide in the crook of Molly’s shoulder. “Why don’t you just stay?”

“I mean, I’d stay the night, but I think you have to sign the lease first-”

“I know you said there’s rules with roommates and relationships-”

“Oh, _oh,_ you want to move out together? Don’t you want your own space?” Molly hadn’t even considered that. He just always assumed Caleb would need space. He had his own space at the bookstore, he had his own space in the apartment, he talked endlessly about the space he was making for each of them in the new mansion spell he’d found, he had his own space carved out everywhere he went.

“Not without you.”

Molly pulled back, taking in the sight of his pink flush under freckled cheeks. “I’m… Really? You want to keep living with me? I thought I was a horrible roommate, Gustav always told me so-”

Despite the flush, Caleb rolled his eyes and kissed him, only pulling back when all the thoughts had left Molly’s head. “You’ve been a lovely roommate to me. Even if you do take too long in the shower. But now that I know joining you is an option-”

Molly took that chance to kiss him, grinning broadly. “Let’s sign the damn papers so we can kick out the realtor and try it.”

Caleb’s face turned redder than his hair, and Molly was completely in love.


	67. Housewarming

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Molly and Caleb furnish their new apartment and throw a housewarming party at Jester's insistence.

### Chapter 67: Housewarming 

When Caleb had agreed to see the apartment Molly wanted to show him, he was determined to find something wrong with it. Something to keep him from moving out. But as they continued through the place, it became clearer and clearer that it would be foolish not to take it. They were probably laundering money out of the building or something for rent to be this cheap, but it wasn’t in the best location, farther from any of the city’s landmarks. For Caleb though, it was only a five minute walk from the bookstore.

It was perfect.

He could find nothing wrong with it, nothing that Molly didn’t have a cheerful solution for. Too bright? They’d make curtains. Tile floors too cold in the winter? Molly would help him buy fluffy rugs, and they could even get the kind that you could throw in the washing machine for the cat hair. It even had magical wards that he could enhance and modify to help protect him and whoever stayed with him. There was no reason to say no, even though it wasn’t all he wanted.

And somehow he’d been able to voice what it was he wanted, and now he was going to move out with Mollymauk.

By some miracle, Molly wanted to live with him.

Caleb was so shocked by that fact that he was able to shut out all the voices calling for him to push this all away. If Molly wanted this, he could ignore all the feelings of not being able to deserve a place this nice. He could accept that together, they could have this.

For the first time in nine years, Caleb felt like he’d made real steps in taking down Ikithon, and even though the whole process had set him on edge, he was more accepting of himself as of late. At least he was trying. At least he’d accepted he needed help in this. Beau and Molly were helping, and the Cobalt Soul really sounded serious about it. He felt a little safer with the stronger teleportation spell under his belt, able to whisk himself and any others away from danger. The anxiety was still there, but he was managing it.

Beau hadn’t even been upset when he and Molly teleported home instead of taking the train back from Port Damali. He couldn’t be around strangers and she understood. She’d said she was proud of him. So had Molly.

It was a very overwhelming few weeks.

Jester was very insistent that Caleb and Molly have a housewarming party, just like she did when she moved out of the apartments above the _Lavish Chateau._ She insisted that with how well the bakery was doing and how he was spending less on rent than he expected by moving out with Molly that he needed to buy some comfy chairs to go with Molly’s couch and host a party.

She and Veth agreed to cover food, and so Caleb was just left with the task of furnishing an apartment to be acceptable for company.

It was something he’d never done before, and he really wasn’t sure what he was supposed to do. When he lived with Beau and Veth, they had pretty much handled everything themselves. He furnished a bedroom at the local surplus store and called it a day. Mollymauk had needed a moving truck to bring everything from his old apartment, but Caleb barely had enough in terms of belongings to fill half a closet. Most of what he’d owned was burned in the fire or was strictly utilitarian.

The only thing he really knew he wanted was a nice desk. And he knew where he wanted to get it too, since he had the coin for it. He was able to order one from the artisan shop he’d loved to peek in as a child in Blumenthal. Luckily he was able to order it all online, even though he wanted special inserts in the drawers to hold certain spell components, so no one could recognize his voice or accent. The piece would take weeks to be made to order, and a small fortune to ship down to the coast, but he could still smell the fresh wood from the shop. To be able to have a small piece of his hometown in his new home… It felt right.

To be able to build a home with his friends, with Mollymauk, felt like a strange dream. There were still whispers about whether or not he deserved such a thing, but he could shove them down when he saw how happy everyone was about it.

Veth and Beau decided to take him to what they called a “real” furniture store, though he saw little difference rather than price. They insisted the fact that the chairs didn’t all smell like cigarette smoke and have coffee stains was worth the extra coin. Veth was there to make sure whatever he bought would match all of Molly’s eclectic shiny things, and Beau was there to make sure Veth didn’t force Caleb to buy something he would actually hate just because the halfling loved it.

They made a good team, though efficiency wasn’t a part of the equation. It took them half a day to pick out everything Beau and Veth insisted he would need. Insisting that it wouldn’t have costed him as much as replacing his old bed and furnishing a place on his own, they eventually filled a van that Fjord was able to borrow from a friend down at the docks with enough chairs for everyone in the Nein, area rugs, side tables, a storage ottoman with a pocket dimension in it, and quite a few bookshelves.

Yasha showed up right at the end to pick out a new couch with Beau, since Molly would be taking his, and helped them load everything into the van and out into Caleb’s apartment. He and Veth focused on setting things up after finding they were mostly in the way of the two lesbians carrying the heavier stuff. Before long the apartment was looking less sparse, enough so that it elicited a grin from Mollymauk that made Caleb’s stomach somersault. It was slowly sinking in that he was really moving in with Molly, and that they’d be building this space and memories to fill it together.

Caduceus had shown up the next afternoon with a small shopping cart full of house plants, and a few kitchen utensils he (correctly) assumed Caleb and Molly were missing. He only left once every plant pot had a little sticky note with correct care instructions, and Caleb’s phone had reminders set for when to water them all. After needlessly assuring Caleb that they were all cat safe plants, even though Frumpkin wouldn’t have been bothered either way, he left him to his own devices again.

Jester attempted to burst in the afternoon before the party, pouting when she found the door locked, though it was hard to tell what facial expression she was making under the pile of fabric she was holding. She insisted Molly had invited her, though Caleb didn’t remember him mentioning it and suspected he’d perhaps mentioned it in passing without solidifying plans. This theory was strengthened by the fact that he was at work.

But Jester wasn’t to be deterred, recruiting Caleb to help instead and making him pick a fabric to make curtains out of. How she’d managed to carry a sewing machine, sewing box, and huge armful of fabric up to his apartment, Caleb didn’t understand. She really was ridiculously strong. His job was to pick a color and to measure the window frames. Jester was insistent that she could make them and Molly could decorate them with embroidery.

After handing her careful notes on the dimensions of every window he could find, and discussing a sheer one for the bathroom, he kept himself busy by hanging up some of Molly’s tapestries. He was working late at the _Lavish Chateau,_ but even if he wanted them in different places he could use the hooks Caleb used to move things around. If Caleb’s memory was good for anything, he knew exactly how they had gone in Molly’s bedroom. The string lights around the bed were easy too.

By the time he gave up trying to figure out which shiny trinkets hung where since they all looked the same, Caleb returned to Jester and helped her hang up what she had so far. He got a phone call that the television Molly had ordered had just arrived and he thankfully had Jester to help him get it inside. For now it just sat on one of Caleb’s empty bookshelves, but it was much better than it had been.

Molly came home and hugged him immediately, whispering in his ear with reverence that made Caleb's heart soar, “It looks like a home.”

The party was relaxed and calm, with Jester and Veth arriving early to set up more food than any of them could possibly eat. Veth was carrying what seemed like a full bar, insisting that they needed to be “well stocked.”

Their friends soon piled in and had strange cocktails in mismatched mugs while talking around slices of pizza and the latest from the _Tusk Love_ creators, _Fifty Shades of Green,_ playing in the living room.

Molly had claimed the small loveseat for himself and Caleb, the one Caleb had bought with Veth and Luc in mind, forcing them so close together it was impossible not to touch. One purple arm had snuck its way around Caleb’s waist and was tracing soothing circles in his hip as Frumpkin crawled up in his lap to purr and make biscuits. Jester and Beau were arguing about the choices the director made in the movie while everyone chattered and watched the horrible movie in the background.

Yasha and Beau were curled up together on the couch, finally completely relaxed around each other now that they’d talked and officially decided to have Beau move in. Fjord and Caduceus were talking about visiting the Clays in the Savalierwood together, and taking Caleb up on his offer to teleport them straight there. Since Caduceus’s family could mail them something from their home, he could teleport there with pinpoint accuracy.

Veth had claimed a seat on the ottomon near Caleb and Molly, showing Caleb pictures of Luc volunteering at the animal shelter and going to practice with his crossbow at the shooting range on her phone. She was happier to share all those moments with pictures now that she could be in them without feeling like she needed to disguise herself.

Caleb had even been able to convince her to change her name on instagram to “veththebrave.” She was mostly just impressed that he’d figured out the app enough to follow her and did as he asked. Frumpkin was doing well on the platform after the picture of him in a wizard hat got popular. And Caleb wasn’t one to deny the world of his cat’s cuteness.

He was shaken out of his thoughts by Jester standing up when the movie finished. “Okay! I know we said no gifts, because _I_ said no gifts when you all came over to my new place, _but_ I saw this and couldn’t resist!”

After her little speech she pulled a small box out of her pink haversack and thrust it into Molly’s lap, since Caleb’s was occupied with a cat.

Jester vibrated with excitement as Molly shredded the paper, giving the ribbon to an equally excited Frumpkin.

Before they even got a good chance to look at it, she said, “It’s a camera! The instant kind! You guys don’t have any pictures of us, so now you can take a bunch and remember us all the time!”

Molly’s face spread into a grin as he got out the camera and popped in a cartridge of film. Before Caleb could even blink, the flash blew out his vision and he was staring at a smirking tiefling holding a picture of him and Frumpkin. “Jester, you’re a genius,” he said, leaning over to kiss her cheek and passing it to her. “Take one of us?”

“Of course!” she beamed, setting it up before Caleb could argue or bury his face in Frumpkin’s fur. Now quite familiar with being photographed, the cat managed to get the package’s bow directly on his head in the picture, Molly leaning to kiss Caleb’s cheek as the flash went off.

Jester cooed at the picture as it developed, bending down to show it to Veth who just grinned and said, “It’s like a family portrait!”

“That would need to have all of us, Schatz,” Caleb said quietly, sure his cheeks were red.

But Molly was more than happy to run with that idea and save him. “Yeah! Can one of you magic people take a picture of all of us?”

Jester nodded eagerly and grabbed her talisman of the Traveler. Suddenly there were two of her, one grabbing the camera from Molly’s hands. “Everyone get in! And say… penis! What? Cheese is so boring-”

The flash went off just as everyone started laughing, the duplicate bowing before Caleb and Molly as it presented the photograph of them all. Veth was leaning against Caleb's legs, mid snort, Molly’s eyes crinkled around the edges and he had knocked his horn into Caleb as he slung an arm around the laughing redhead, Yasha had cracked a rare smile at a pouting Jester while Caduceus grinned and ruffled her blue hair, and Fjord and Beau both looked like they’d split a seam laughing so hard. Frumpkin was still wrapped up in the ribbon, caught mid swipe as he batted at the glittering thing. And there was a small, spectral mage hand making bunny ears over Fjord’s head.

It was the best picture Caleb had ever seen.


	68. Home

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tooth rotting, completely over the top sweet, self indulgent, domestic fluff

### Chapter 68: Home

Molly could definitely get used to all these parties. Especially as Caleb got more and more comfortable with being affectionate around their friends. For the first time since he crawled out of the ground four years ago he had a place that really felt like a home. There was no mold in the bathroom, no cockroaches to look out for, and his bedroom didn’t smell like the many one night stands of his old ones.

It smelled like incense and old books mingling with his perfume, and he was very pleased with it all.

The picture of him kissing Caleb’s cheek was tucked safely in his wallet, and he was going to cherish every damn moment of this. Caleb had finally asked for what he wanted. And Caleb wanted _him._

He was on cloud nine.

“We should do this every week. Switch apartments, watch shitty movies, eat good food, just have… like family time,” Molly said.

“Like family dinner!” Jester said, clapping at the notion.

Beau lifted the _Fifty Shades of Green_ dvd case, “I don’t think they play porn at family dinners.”

“It’s not real porn,” Molly said, rolling his eyes. “But point taken. We’re a very fucked up family, but we’re still family.”

“Fjord and I could host next week. Maybe Jester could come over early and we could all cook together,” Caduceus said, trying to get them alone together to finally admit something. Well, that’s what Molly assumed. Caduceus was hard to read sometimes, but that’s what Molly would be doing in his place. The way those two were dancing around each other was getting exhausting.

Jester kissed Caduceus’s cheek. “Perfect!”

“I hope you all know you’re never getting home cooked food when you come to our place,” Beau said, looking at Yasha who confirmed with a nod.

“Or here,” Molly said, knowing that would probably end in disaster. “Pizza and booze will be readily available.”

Caleb chuckled under his breath, and Molly wasn’t sure if he was laughing at him, or at Frumpkin still chasing the ribbon off Jester’s camera. He’d gotten his phone out, taking pictures of the cat. Molly was very proud of the familiar’s little following on instagram, and took care to share every single post Caleb made.

Seeing other people enjoy Frumpkin made Caleb smile, and Molly couldn’t ever resist that.

Caduceus and Fjord figured out a date that worked for everyone, and agreed to have everyone over at seven the next week. Those two also stayed behind to help clean things up, Caduceus slipping some cans of loose leaf tea into the cupboard. “Forgot to bring these by when I brought the plants. I know this one helps you sleep, Molly.”

“Thanks, Cad,” he grinned, bumping his hip against him as he loaded the nine different mismatched mugs in the dishwasher. “You’re too good to us.”

“Like you said, we’re pretty much family,” Caduceus said, smiling and gathering his things.

Fjord finished up packing away the last of the food Jester had brought and said, “We’ll see you folks next week, I guess.”

“Thanks for coming,” Caleb said, collecting dirty paper plates in the living room and throwing them away.

They waved and Molly and Caleb were left alone. Molly snuck up behind Caleb, snaking his arms around his waist and kissing his neck. “Did you have fun?”

“As far as housewarming parties go, it was quite nice,” Caleb said, turning carefully to peck Molly’s cheek without knocking into his horn. He still sent the charms jingling, but that only made Molly grin.

Molly said, “I mean the only other one I’ve been to was Jester’s. And having you fall asleep on my shoulder wasn’t something I disliked, especially back when I was scared to come on too strong with you.”

“I never thought someone as beautiful as you could think of me like that,” Caleb mumbled, turning more so his face was hidden in the crook of Molly’s neck.

Twisting so Caleb was tucked into his chest, he kissed the top of his head. “I thought you were gorgeous from the moment I saw you. You were telling Yasha something that made you happy, and your smile was brighter than the sun.”

Molly could feel the wizard’s cheeks heat up against his chest, and also predict the deflection of the comment. It wasn’t as bad as it could have been, but Caleb did say, “You’re ridiculous.”

“That’s very true, but I’m still right,” he said, kissing the crown of his head again. “Now, let’s get comfy. We live alone now, there’s no reason for us not to be half naked.”

Caleb snorted but allowed himself to be dragged into their bedroom to change into pajamas. “I think the reason not to be half naked is being cold. But I won’t stop you.”

“Well, you can just admire the view,” Molly said, grinning and stripping down to boxers.

But when he looked up Caleb was in sweatpants and _his_ hoodie. The one he’d given Caleb when most of his clothes were covered in blood and they couldn’t get home. The one he’d caught him smelling after the mage fucked with his head. It was already a bit big on Molly, so it completely dwarfed Caleb in the deep plum fabric and it was unfairly cute.

“Is that my hoodie?”

Biting his lip, Caleb looked down at it and stuck his hands in the big pocket over the stomach. “I think it’s mine now,” he said plainly. “You gave it to me. And I haven’t given it back.”

“And if I tried to take it back?” Molly asked, stepping forward with a glint in his eye.

Caleb stood his ground. “I would do what Jester showed me.”

“And what would that be?” Molly said, cocking his head. With Jester it was always something unexpected.

Caleb took his hands out of the pocket with each one completely covered by the long sleeves. “I’ve been told that these can be adequate nonlethal weapons.” And he gave a demonstration with a lopsided grin, swinging his hands just slightly so the sleeves flailed about.

Molly laughed and caught the sleeves and pulled him closer. “You’re the cutest fucking thing alive,” he said, leaning forward to kiss his freckled nose.

“That’s Frumpkin, not me.”

He rolled his eyes and kissed Calebs’ forehead. “Second cutest then. And we should absolutely buy a little sweater for Frumpkin.”

Caleb moved forward and rested his head on Molly’s shoulder. “Ja, we should. A little blue one.”

“I bet Caduceus could knit you one. When’s your birthday?”

“Ah, next month. The eighth of Sydenstar, right after Highsummer.”

Molly hummed, “I’ll let Cad know that’s what you want. Wait, only a month? How am I supposed to plan for that?”

“I don’t need anything special, Mollymauk. You’ve done so much. I don’t need anything really,” Caleb said, pulling back with a frown.

Shaking his head, Molly pulled him back in tighter. “You gave me a birthday. You deserve a good one too. No arguing. Veth and Jester will back me up on that too.”

“I’m sure they already have plans,” Caleb said, half smothered in Molly’s chest.

“I’ll have to confer with them. You deserve something wonderful, even if you disagree. You have to admit your gift was perfect,” he said, releasing his wizard so he could show off the tarot card on his arm, done by Orly a few weeks prior. The colors were vibrant against his purple skin and the version of the Star card was taken from his new deck with the art nouveau style. It meant inspiration, good health, and hope. It was lovely, and it was a little piece of art that Caleb had allowed him to keep with him forever.

Smiling softly, Caleb traced his fingers over the ink. “I’m glad you still like it.”

“I love it.” _And you._

Molly had resolved to get Ikithon behind bars first. Or in a shallow grave. If anyone deserved that, it was him. He would tell Caleb he loved him, once Caleb wasn’t worried about saying it back. Once Caleb didn’t have to worry about what that might mean, or what might happen if Ikithon wanted to use his feelings against him. Then Molly could say it. And Caleb could say it back. If he wanted to.

At the very least, Molly would make sure that it wouldn’t be Ikithon’s fault if Caleb didn’t express the same feelings.

Instead he could focus how the first big thing he’d gotten Caleb to tell him he wanted was to live together.

Instead he could focus on making Caleb laugh while they brushed their teeth by making strange faces at him in the bathroom mirror, getting him to snort and almost spit white foam all over the mirror. Of course, that made Molly laugh, and he started coughing on minty foam while Caleb spit and offered him a glass of water.

“You’ll be the death of me, Mollymauk,” he said, rinsing out his mouth.

Molly rolled his eyes as they moved into the bedroom. “I can think of a few more exciting ways for us to go out together than laughing around toothpaste.”

“I’m not sure I’m up for anything exciting. I’m exhausted,” Caleb said, patting his shoulder so Frumpkin hopped up and got settled in the hood of Molly’s old hoodie. The purring was loud enough for Molly to hear it across the room. He was never getting that sweatshirt back.

He found he didn’t really mind.

They curled under the sheets, Molly taking some time to embroider swirling designs on the blue curtains Jester had made for them. The abstract patterns started to look more and more like the weird glyphs in Caleb’s arcane tome the longer he went, until he was so tired he was pricking himself with the needle more than he was making any headway. He folded it up and curled closer to Caleb, propping himself up on one arm and staring up at him.

His hair was lit up like a golden flame in the soft lamp light, and the string lights above them danced in his eyes like stars. Molly wanted to pull him down and count all his freckles again. Maybe see if the number changed. Maybe kiss each one.

Caleb didn’t notice he was staring, completely engrossed in his book. His eyes flitted over the pages with great speed and there was a small furrow in his brow as he concentrated intensely on the text. Frumpkin was still curled around his neck, purring against his back and filling the room with a gentle white noise in the form of the cute rumbling.

It was too perfect. Molly could hardly believe it was all real.

"Can I say something?"

"Sure. Is everything okay?" Caleb asked, putting down his book.

Molly nodded quickly, not wanting to worry his wizard. Caleb had looked terrified when he said “we need to talk” about the goodbye note. He was just having trouble finding the right words. "I'm just… I'm really happy you wanted to move in together. I didn’t expect it and… It’s just really nice.”

Caleb closed the book and moved to mirror Molly’s position, face to face. Frumpkin made a soft noise before heading over to a different pillow and leaving them alone. “I’m very happy too. You make me happy. I’m eager to… what did you call it? Build a home again?”

“Yes. And I like making you happy,” Molly murmured, catching Caleb’s cheek to rub in his hand. “You have a beautiful smile.”

“You’re not so bad yourself,” Caleb said, leaning into the touch before snaking an arm around Molly’s waist and pulling him closer. “But I’m afraid I’m a bit tired to do anything about it.”

Laughing softly, Molly pulled him in for a quick kiss. “Let’s sleep then. We’ve both got to work tomorrow anyways.”

Caleb nodded, wriggling from Molly’s vice-like grip to turn the lamp off and settle closer. Molly started rubbing slow circles on his back, keeping him close and enjoying how snuggly he was in the hoodie.

“Caleb?” he whispered, feeling his breathing slow under the purple fingers rubbing circles as sleep took him.

But he still made a soft hum of acknowledgment through his sleepy haze.

Molly smiled in the darkness. 

“Welcome home.”


	69. Show You Care

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Caleb's love language has always been more with actions than words. Molly isn't used to that, but he could certainly get used to it.
> 
> (this is just a fluffy sicfic, merry christmas)

### Chapter 69: Show You Care

Caleb felt _safe._

The enchanted wards on the apartment had been strengthened to protect the whole place from divination magic, any ways the place could be physically harmed, and a few extra unlikely things just in case (protecting himself from various fiends and undead seemed like overkill, but he was satisfied). The large minotaur security guard at the front desk has descriptions of all the people that were allowed up to see Caleb (the Mighty Nein, Yussa, Wensforth, Calianna, Reani, Yeza, Luc, and Pumat), and all others would be carefully vetted. There was even a button under the counter for him to quickly call the Zhelezo.

It was the first time he'd felt really safe in a place in years.

It was probably the safest he’d felt since he’d started getting trained by Ikithon.

This was all occurring to Caleb in a wave of overwhelming emotion as he laid in Mollymauk’s bed ( _his_ bed, _their_ bed) before the tiefling woke up for his shift at the _The Fletching and Moondrop Emporium of Curiosities._ It was wonderful and tender, so of course it was interrupted by Molly sneezing.

“Gesundheit,” Caleb said, grinning and offering him a box of tissues. “And good morning.”

Molly groaned and sat up to blow his nose. “Mornin’. What time is it?”

“Eight fifty three.” Caleb sat up, frowning now at just how congested Molly sounded when he spoke. He was sleeping fine, but now he sounded quite stuffy. And he looked rather pale.

“Gods… I feel like shit,” Molly grumbled, rubbing his temples. “Guess I caught Gustav’s cold.”

“Do you want me to call Jester? I think she can use some of her magic to heal it,” Caleb asked, brushing the hair off Molly’s clammy brow and wondering if it would bother him if the lights were turned up. He wanted to see exactly how pale Molly looked, since even in low light it didn’t look good.

But Molly shook his head, “No, healing diseases fucks with your immune system. You gotta ride it out or you get sick all the time.”

“I’m not sure that’s entirely true.” Caleb said, already reaching for his phone.

“S’always worked for me,” Molly mumbled, suppressing a shiver.

“And have you always been good friends with clerics who do this for free?” Caleb asked.

He frowned. “No, but it’s still a thing.”

“Alright, well, how can I help? Do you feel feverish, or do you think it’s just a cold?”

“My throat hurts, mostly,” Molly said, and it was more of a croak than anything else. “I’ll just call out and sleep it off. No worries.”

Caleb sighed and handed Molly his phone. “As long as you promise to really rest. If you spend all day watching stressful television you’ll only prolong the whole thing.”

Nodding, Molly dialed up Gustav’s number and croaked out his apologies for not being able to come in while Caleb pulled out his own phone to start texting people. Fjord was first, since he’d rather not completely close the bookstore as he skipped his shift.

>   
>  **Caleb:** Hallo, Fjord.  
>  **Caleb:** Would you be willing to cover my afternoon shift today at the bookstore? It’s 1:00-6:30, but any part of that would be appreciated.
> 
> **Fjord:** I’d love to; I could use the extra hours!
> 
> **Caleb:** I’m glad.  
>  **Caleb:** I might need you tomorrow too, if you really need the extra time.
> 
> **Fjord:** Just keep me posted, I think I can do tomorrow.
> 
> **Caleb:** I’ll let you know.  
> 

Caleb then pulled up his conversation with Caduceus, smiling at the old texts about the firbolg bringing him house plants. So far he hadn’t overwatered or killed any of them, and both he and Molly were quite proud of the collection. It was nice to have something alive in the apartment besides themselves and Frumpkin.

But for now there were other pressing concerns.

>   
>  **Caleb:** Caduceus, are you very busy at the moment?
> 
> **Caduceus:** Not at all, Mr. Caleb  
>  **Caduceus:** How can I help you this morning?
> 
> **Caleb:** Mollymauk is sick but doesn’t want magic healing. Do you have any soup?  
>  **Caleb:** Or soup recipes? I don’t think he’d object to herbal remedies.
> 
> **Caduceus:** _Downloading picture attachment…_  
>  **Caduceus:** That’s my mother’s cure-all recipe for pretty much anything that can’t be cured with magic  
>  **Caduceus:** You have all those herbs, I only gave you utilitarian plants when you moved in  
>  **Caduceus:** Not that plants can’t be utilitarian and nonconsumable  
>  **Caduceus:** I’m sure you understand what I mean  
>  **Caduceus:** They’re all labeled on the post-it notes on the pots
> 
> **Caleb:** Thank you. You’re a saint.  
> 

Molly peered over his shoulder, frowning at the phone. “You text like an old man.”

“I am an old man.”

Halfway through a chuckle, Molly started coughing. “Ugh, I definitely feel like an old man. It’s disgusting, how do you deal with it?”

“Generally I let my magic friends heal my sicknesses.”

“And how many times a year do you get sick?” Molly asked, raising a brow.

Caleb frowned. “Probably like once every other month or so.”

“I blame the magic,” Molly said, like it proved his point.

Caleb laughed once without much humor. “I blame the immune system weakened by mental illnesses. But I won’t force anything on you. Except tea. And soup.”

“I will not turn down tea before you go to work,” Molly said, burrowing back into the blankets with a shiver.

“I’ll be right back,” he said, going to the kitchen to put on the kettle and bring out the “immune boost blend” of tea Caduceus had made for him the last time he had the firbolg chase off a cold. Maybe Molly was right.

Instead of entertaining the thought of just suffering through a cold instead of working through it with magic and research from bed, Caleb pulled out the sofa bed and began to compile a nest of every throw blanket and pillow Veth and Beau had convinced him to buy. From the hall closet he grabbed a heating pad and an extra box of tissues, checking to see that the wards were working well just as a habit.

Everything was perfect.

The kettle whistled and Caleb poured out their tea, rifling through cabinets to make sure he had everything they needed for Caduceus’s soup. By some miracle (and that miracle’s name was Veth, who had insisted that Caleb have company while grocery shopping so he didn’t just buy cereal and frozen dinners), he had all the ingredients, and a very carefully notated recipe written in the looping cursive of a mother.

Gathering all the herbs he needed in little bunches, he piled them into a small colander to be washed and prepared Molly’s tea with a healthy spoonful of honey.

“I made tea and set up the couch so you’ll be warm. I can keep you company while I make soup. We can both have some for lunch.” Caleb stuck his head back in the bedroom to see Molly blowing his nose again.

“You’re an angel,” he mumbled, stuffy nose twisting his words and making him sound ridiculous.

Caleb smiled. “That’s Yasha.”

“Both of you,” Molly insisted, collapsing into the blanket nest in the living room. “This is amazing.”

“Well, you need to get better,” Caleb said, handing him the mug of tea and slipping back into the kitchenette to watch over Molly and chop up all the vegetables for the soup.

“Tryin’ my best,” Molly mumbled, cocooning himself in blankets and flipping on some rerun of the Great Marquesian Baking Show. 

It was hard to see from the kitchen, but Caleb was pretty sure that Molly was fading in and out, occasionally rising up to sip at the tea. Caleb’s stomach started to growl as the onions and garlic cooked in the oil, making him realize he never ate any breakfast. He grabbed an orange in an effort to protect himself from getting the same cold, though sleeping in the same bed as the sick tiefling would probably be his undoing. 

About halfway through making the soup, Caleb made another kettle of tea, just for Molly this time, and poured him another cup.

“You’re conspiring against me, making me get up a million times to pee,” Molly grumbled, sipping at the tea anyways.

Caleb rolled his eyes, “You need to stay hydrated, and you know that. Would you like something other than tea?”

“No,” he said into the mug, clearly enjoying it and holding the warm cup close to his chest. He looked smaller wrapped up in blankets, dwarfed by the many ridiculous patterns and textures. It was far too cute for a sick person to look.

Soon Caleb replaced the mug of tea with a mug of soup, and had some of his own, curling up in a chair near Molly. The tiefling dutifully had the whole mug, and Caleb could see his eyelids droop from his seat, even in the dim light. He rescued the mug and replaced it with a freshly microwaved heating pad. “Try to sleep, ja?”

“Mhmm,” Molly mumbled, eyes already sliding closed.

Caleb smiled and curled back up in his chair, grabbing a few tomes he needed to read for Yussa. He could be pretty productive from home, and it was rare that he got to relax and care for someone else. It was easier to take care of someone than it was to take care of himself, but it was very pleasant to take advantage of the quiet days the process brought.

He was halfway through the second book when he heard a sound from Molly on the couch. His face was contorted in a frown and he was beginning to move more in his blanket cocoon.

“Molly?” Caleb asked, wondering if he had gotten overheated. “Are you alright?”

Molly thrashed in the blankets, groaning in what sounded like pain. Probably a nightmare, though this seemed new. Caleb didn’t want to startle him awake, but also didn’t want him to hurt himself. Tentatively he put a hand on Molly’s shoulder, calling his name, “Mollymauk. You’re alright. You’re safe.”

His eyes flew open, and for a moment Caleb thought they were glowing in the dim light. By the time he blinked and looked closer it was over, Molly just breathing heavily through his congested chest and starting to cough. “Fuck-”

“What do you need?” Caleb asked, squeezing his shoulder gently. The lemon candies were across the room in his coat, but he could get them quickly. He could cast a spell to bring them over if Molly needed him to stay.

Molly’s breathing slowed, and his eyes met Caleb’s with recognition. “I don’t… A tissue maybe. And a hug.”

“In that order?” Caleb asked, brushing the curls off Molly’s clammy forehead.

The tiefling nodded, allowing Caleb to help him upright so he could blow his nose and curl into Caleb’s chest.

“You’re safe. I’m here,” Caleb murmured, petting his hair. “Do you want the lemon candies?”

Molly shook his head. “Different kind of dream. Nightmare, I guess. I don’t even… I can’t really remember it. But it’s getting better. I’m getting better.”

“You don’t remember?” Caleb asked. That was definitely new. Usually all of Molly’s nightmares were of being buried alive, or other forms of death and grave dirt. And his normal dreams were wild and imaginative ones that he liked to relay to Caleb when he woke up.

But now Molly shook his head, his breathing slowing back to normal. “I think it was red? And hungry? Gods, I don’t know. In the dream it was scary.”

“I understand,” Caleb said, rubbing Molly’s back in careful circles. “I’m glad you’re okay.”

“I’m gonna get you sick,” Molly mumbled, but didn’t pull away from the touch.

He rolled his eyes. “I’ll let Caduceus or Jester heal me.”

Molly nodded, curling up more in Caleb’s chest. “I… alright. Thank you. What time is it? Did I sleep all day?” He shifted to look at the pulled curtains.

“It’s three forty two.”

He pulled away with a start, knocking Caleb with his horn on the chin on the way up. “Fuck- sorry, but you’re going to be late for work! You’re already late-”

“I had Fjord cover my shift. I’m not late to anything,” Cale reassured him, rubbing at his shoulder.

Molly faltered, blinking away some of the hazy confusion of waking up from a nightmare. “You called out? Are you feeling okay?”

“Ah,” Caleb looked at his lap, “I know you did not ask me to, and you’re perfectly capable of taking care of yourself. But… meine Mutter always took the day off when I wasn’t feeling well, or mein Vater. It just seemed… right.”

Sitting up a bit more, Molly didn’t say anything, seeming like he was processing all the words slowly.

Caleb couldn’t take the silence, saying, “I am glad I stayed. I know you don’t like waking up after a nightmare alone.”

“You stayed to look after me?” he finally asked, voice soft and still congested.

“I… ja. Is that okay?” Caleb asked, suddenly worried about not asking. He hadn’t wanted to offend Mollymauk.

He nodded quickly. “I just… I don’t think anyone’s ever done that for me before. Gustav would run up and check on me if I was, like dying on his couch sometimes, but he never stopped working. Yasha was the same way.”

“Even if it was just a small cold that I had to stay home for, meine Mutter would stay and look after us. I think it was one of the ways she showed she cared. We weren’t the type to say it out loud much, but with actions… I know they cared.” Caleb’s eye’s itched with the threat of tears. “Entshuldigung, I didn’t mean to detract from what you were saying,” he mumbled, not wanting to talk about himself when Molly had been talking about his own past.

Purple fingers laced in his own. For once, Molly’s hand felt colder than his. “You never have to apologize for wanting to talk about them. I’ll always be here for that.”

Caleb nodded, but it was too raw. He’d been allowing himself to think about them more, trying to prepare for their anniversary. Caduceus was holding onto the hydrangeas and white tulip bulbs for him, and he’d been talking over some very basic ideas with Pumat, just to see if he could handle it.

So instead of telling Molly that this was how he felt people showed care, instead of telling him about how his parents showed their love, he just took a deep breath. “I’m glad I was here. Would you like some more soup?”

Molly smiled a soft smile, reaching up his hand to rub at Caleb’s freckled cheek. “I’d love some, thank you.”

“Of course,” Caleb said, kissing his forehead as he stood and filled a mug for him. He could show he cared, at the very least. And it looked like Molly understood.


	70. Anniversary

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Caleb is missing

### Chapter 70: Anniversary 

When Molly woke up in the morning, Caleb was gone.

It wasn’t that strange for the wizard to be missing when he woke up, but this was Caleb’s day off. Lately whenever Caleb had a day off and Molly worked in the afternoon they’d been spending the mornings together, making breakfast (ensuring Caleb remembered to eat, and Molly remembered to eat something besides fruit gummies or whatever he found in the vending machine outside the _Emporium),_ and just hanging out. Molly was enjoying the little moments and how quiet and domestic they felt. He could imagine spending the rest of his life doing little things like that with Caleb, and he was surprised to find how much he was going to miss that. Though it hadn’t been an agreed upon thing, and certainly wasn’t a missed date, Molly wasn’t expecting Caleb to just disappear.

That and his wizard had been acting a bit strange all week, distant and more gloomy than usual. Molly hadn’t pressed, just being there when he could and doing all he could to help. Making dinner, picking up a box of Zemnian chocolates on his way home a few days ago, doing the laundry and loading the dishwasher so Caleb didn’t have to worry about it, little things here and there.

Molly was still reeling a bit from how Caleb had stayed home from work and made him soup a few weeks ago, so he was trying his best to show he cared in a way that Caleb would understand and recognize. And from what he could see, Caleb needed it this past week.

He probably just left to get some research done and hadn’t wanted to wake Molly. Caleb still felt bad about disturbing him in the mornings, no matter how many times he said he didn’t mind. Molly would never be a morning person, but he was never actually grumpy. The wizard treaded lightly in the mornings anyways, trying to stay as quiet as possible. That was very likely what had happened. With Yussa in town, Caleb was definitely working more. Still, he was a bit worried. And he knew Veth wouldn’t mind him being careful.

> **Molly:** Hey, is Caleb in his study? He didn’t tell me where he was going and I wanted to give him something  
> 

That was nonchalant enough. He could show up with lunch later and it would be totally normal. Molly didn’t want Caleb to worry about Molly worrying. That was a ridiculous cycle no one needed.

Veth would answer his text and maybe Molly would grab some good takeout for them to share for lunch. It was getting warmer in Nicodranas, and a picnic might be nice. He might even be able to convince Caleb to take a long lunch and share a bottle of wine down on the beach.

And when Veth answered the text, he could segway into asking about Caleb’s birthday. He had a few things planned, but he wanted to make sure it was all perfect. Caleb deserved to feel loved, especially when he took so much care to do the same for his friends.

But Veth didn’t answer his text. She _called_ him.

“Veth? Is everything okay?” he asked, unable to help himself. The seed of doubt blooming in his stomach was growing faster by the second.

“Caleb’s not in your apartment? You’re sure?” she asked, sounding about as panicked as he was starting to feel.

Molly had already been everywhere in their apartment to use the bathroom and grab himself breakfast. “No, I’m sure. Where do you think he is?”

“Fuck. I should have known… This happens every year. Well, it used to.” She sounded devastated, and Molly was just thoroughly confused.

He asked, “What happens every year? Is he okay?”

“It’s-It’s the anniversary of something. I don’t know what. Either his parents dying, or leaving the Sanatorium, or leaving home, or something. The first year I knew him he disappeared for a week. It was the most alone I’d ever felt in my life. When he came back he said he’d gotten thrown in jail for loitering. But I _know_ he was lying; I checked all the prisons and hospitals in the city. The second year the same thing happened, but I figured then he’d come back. It seemed like it got better when we came to Nicodranas. He just pretended to be sick.” Veth spoke all in a rush, and Molly could hear small hitches in her breath as she started to panic.

Molly swallowed, sinking down into the couch slowly. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“I thought he’d be better this year! Beau knows about it; I always made sure she would pick up food for him and he’d just lock himself in his room for a day.” She sounded on the verge of tears. “It’s not my place either. He hasn’t even told me this; I just figured it out on my own. And I forgot Beau wouldn't be there.”

He groaned, head falling against the couch. This was worse than he thought. “He doesn’t _have_ a room to lock himself in. Not unless you count his study. Where would he have gone?”

Even the extra room in their apartment had turned into a shared space. It had been empty for a while, until they figured out what they wanted to do with it. In the end they’d made it a work room, since Caleb noticed that embroidering in strange places led to Molly pricking his fingers. A huge table in the middle of the room was divided down the middle with one half containing bolts of fabric and loose piles of embroidery thread that were too long to throw away and the other half holding more books than Molly thought any one man could own, little braziers that smelled funny, spell components, sketched chalk circles, and piles of notes.

Caleb had bought them matching desk chairs to work in, and pushed his fancy desk up against the wall behind Molly’s side of the table. It meant Molly could roll backwards and reach Caleb, ask him a question or kiss him on the cheek, then roll back. He liked working in the space alongside Caleb, and had resolved to pick a new project once all the curtains were covered in embroidery.

He wasn’t sure _what,_ but he would figure something out. Working alongside the wizard, and occasionally getting to watch him test out new spells was too fun.

But that meant that Caleb had no private space, again. He’d been the one to insist that he didn’t need it, that he wanted to share this place with Molly in every aspect.

But now he was gone.

Veth was still talking, panic starting to drift away into more untethered pessimism. “I… I don’t know. I’m… I’m going to call him. He didn’t used to have a phone. Maybe… Maybe I can get a hold of him.”

“Okay. I might call some other folks. See if he went to Pumat’s or something,” Molly said, not hearing a response as Veth had already hung up.

He eventually just threw it in the groupchat, but no one had seen him. Beau texted him and Nott separately.

> **Beau:** fuck, it’s today  
>  **Beau:** veth, you need to tell molly  
>  **Beau:** and we need to find him NOW
> 
> **Veth:** he knows  
>  **Veth:** and caleb always comes back
> 
> **Beau:** there are evil fucking mages after him??  
>  **Beau:** he like JUST testified against ickythong  
>  **Beau:** he should NOT fucking be alone rn
> 
> **Veth:** fuck  
>  **Veth:** right  
> 

Molly hadn’t thought about that. That… That really wasn’t good.

> **Molly:** I think I’m just gonna text him?  
>  **Molly:** I know he didn’t answer his phone, but he might text?
> 
> **Veth:** let us know  
>  **Veth:** i could get Jester to message him, i think
> 
> **Beau:** yeah, communicate with him the way ikithon used to on his worst day of the year  
>  **Beau:** great idea
> 
> **Veth:** i’d rather startle him and know he’s safe then leave him to die in a ditch somewhere!!  
> 

Molly couldn’t handle that conversation right now. His hands had begun to tremble and images of red blooming across white sweaters began to fill his mind once again. Caleb, lifeless in his arms. Caleb’s blood slipping through his fingers. Caleb with no one to protect him.

He opened his conversation with Caleb, smiling sadly at the picture of Frumpkin with his paws up in the air that Caleb had sent last. Tears had pricked at the corners of his eyes looking at Caleb asking if he should post the photo. It was too cute.

Molly took a deep breath. He was okay. He just learned that new teleportation spell and could leave whenever he needed to.

Negative voices swirled in his mind along with the images of blood.

_You know powerful mages can counter spells like that._

_You know he can only do that once a day, so if they stop him he’s fucked._

_You know he could already be gone, and you’d never even know what happened._

Shaking his head as if that would stop the spiral, Molly willed his shaky fingers to type out a message.

> **Molly:** Hey, Caleb  
>  **Molly:** I know you want to be alone, but Veth, Beau, and I are really worried  
>  **Molly:** Can you just text back and tell me you’re safr?  
>  **Molly:** *safe  
>  **Molly:** I know you’re coming back, since you didn’t say goodbye  
>  **Molly:** Even a 1 letrer text would be fine, just so they don’t worry too much  
>  **Molly:** *letter  
> 

Setting the phone down Molly went to the kitchen to will his hands to stop shaking by making tea. Normally when he texted with Caleb he tried to sound a bit more coherent. He’d even turned on auto capitalization since the man seemed to text like he was writing a professional email.

Maybe Caleb would be able to tell he was worried about him.

His phone continued to buzz, but it was just Beau and Veth arguing for twenty minutes until they agreed to split up and go to every bookstore they could find.

Then there was silence.

The whistling of the kettle almost made him jump out of his skin, and he probably would have burned himself, if he wasn’t fire resistant, with the splashing water. His hands wouldn’t stop shaking even as he lifted the cup to his lips, letting the hot water skald his tongue. He’d already switched shifts with someone at the _Lavish Chateau,_ knowing he wouldn’t be able to perform like this.

An hour later he got a text.

> **Caleb ♥:** I am safe. You can tell them not to worry.

Molly let out a breath he didn’t know he’d been holding, quickly screenshotting the conversation and sending it to Veth and Beau. His hands didn’t stop shaking right away, but got better almost instantly as some of the adrenaline began to wear away into weariness.

> **Molly:** Thank you  
>  **Molly:** Can I ask where you are?  
>  **Molly:** I understand you want to be alone  
>  **Molly:** Just want to make sure you’re safe there

He waited again, hoping to get some kind of an answer back. Jester couldn’t scry on him with his necklace, but Molly couldn’t help but to worry that someone had taken his phone. That would have been easy for any member of the Cerberus Assembly to fake. The more Caleb texted, the surer Molly could be that it was really him.

Another hour passed before his phone buzzed, then buzzed again. And again.

Caleb was calling him, the phone lighting up and showing the contact photo of the redhead grinning with Frumpkin in his little wizard hat.

“Caleb?”

“Hallo. I’m safe. I’m in Blumenthal.”


	71. Blumenthal

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Caleb makes an attempt at grieving, something he's never allowed himself to do.

### Chapter 71: Blumenthal 

Caleb stared at his phone, buzzing softly against the stone.

> **Molly:** Thank you  
>  **Molly:** Can I ask where you are?  
>  **Molly:** I understand you want to be alone  
>  **Molly:** Just want to make sure you’re safe there  
> 

Molly was worried. Molly was worried about _him._ Molly was worried about him, and he had every right to be. Veth and Beau could be mollified when he got back, but the fact that Caleb was worrying Molly ate at him slowly for the hour he stared at his phone.

He was sitting cross legged on the front step of his childhood home. The sun had just started to crest overhead, marking its descent from morning into afternoon. It was two fifteen exactly. Frumpkin had set up residence around his neck, purring and making biscuits and trying his best to be comforting. He was the best cat, but this… this was a lot to deal with. The two large slabs of slate and their connecting stone foundation were all that remained of the mostly wooden structure. The cart had burned, along with everything else, leaving nothing but charred stones and ash.

Arcane fire left little behind. That was a fact Caleb knew well.

The stones were mostly untouched, and there was no one around the small house for miles. He’d checked when he first arrived, hesitant to walk down the small gravel pathway to his ancestral home right away, but the forest had consumed his home, leaving it protected from human intervention. An untouched shrine to the biggest regret of his life, now protected by the overgrown stand of trees on the edge of farmland.

The stones were overgrown now too, moss and ivy curling their way through the mortar and breaking it apart further. His mother’s rose bushes in the back garden had gone wild and were still blooming, scattering white petals over the scorched earth in the speckled light finding its way through the surrounding trees. Life was going on, taking what it could from the past and moving on.

There were small patches of disturbed earth where he had planted Caduceus’s flowers. Hopefully they would continue to bloom and move on just as the rest of this place had. With his luck, they would probably die before he came back next year.

Maybe he could come back sooner, to water them.

His breath wavered as Frumpkin butted into his cheek, tearing him back to reality.

He took a deep breath, then a few more, and hit the little phone near Molly’s name. Molly deserved to hear his voice, to be reassured that he hadn’t been taken. It was a rational fear, to think that someone at the assembly could just imitate him over text. Mollymauk deserved this much.

Well, he deserved more than that, but Caleb didn’t have more to give at the moment.

“Caleb?” Molly sounded just as frazzled as he’d imagined, if not moreso. The confirmation of his worries didn’t help his guilt.

“Hallo. I’m safe. I’m in Blumenthal.”

“Oh,” Molly said, falling silent for a moment. Caleb only let the silence hang. He had no words to fill it. “I… Fuck. Uh, are you okay?”

Caleb swallowed, tracing his finger through the scorch marks and ash on the stone and listening to Frumpkin purring along the back of his neck. “I am safe. You do not need to worry.”

Of course he wasn’t okay. He hadn’t been okay in decades.

“Do you… Would you like to talk about it?”

Caleb sighed softly, thinking over that proposition and grateful for Molly to give him that space to think in silence. This past year he’d talked it over more than ever. He couldn’t say it wasn’t helping. It was nice that Molly knew, and that the Cobalt Soul seemed to want to help get Ikithon out of power.

This was different.

There was a heavy weight in his heart.

A minute and forty eight seconds went by, before eventually he was able to whisper, “I think they would have liked you.”

He could hear the sad smile on Molly’s voice. “I would have loved to meet them. You sure they wouldn’t have been a little worried about the colorful devil that seduced their only son?”

“Nein. They were good people. Good parents. Family. They would have been happy for me. For us.” Caleb said, flipping through the latest spells in his book. He didn’t need any spells for fighting today. He could spend one on this. It would be nice to try the spell anyways, alone in the overgrown woods, on the phone with Molly.

Molly hummed in acknowledgement. "I'm sure they'd be proud of you."

“Excuse me just one moment,” Caleb said, voice hoarse. He couldn’t say yes. He _knew_ they would be. They were too good. They would have understood. They would have forgiven him. They would have been pleased that he’d found happiness again.

That happiness had found him.

But he couldn’t say that. He couldn’t bring that forth into this space, the place of his biggest regret.

Molly said, “Shit, I’m sorry, Caleb. Are you oka-” just as he hung up. He could have tried to sooth Molly’s worries, but he didn’t want to lie. Didn’t want Molly to hear him cry.

What he could do was facetime Molly instead, sending his programmed illusion out into the space. The little amber figures of his mother, father, and himself as a child swirled around the space as Molly picked up immediately.

“Caleb, please, I’m really sorry- Oh… wow,” he said, trailing off at the glowing figures. They brought the memories back to life, each one animated in perfect detail. He could never forget.

These memories… he didn’t want to forget them.

How his father read him a fairytale in his childhood bedroom. How his mother helped him roll out cookies in the kitchen. How his father taught him how to waltz with his feet on his large shoes in their tiny living room. How his mother tucked him in at night and kissed his forehead. How the family gathered around the living room floor on Winter’s Crest morning, each opening presents. How his mother came up behind his father washing dishes and kissed his cheek before wrapping her arms around his waist. How the two of them curled up on the couch, Leofric head lolling onto Una’s shoulder as he dozed and she kept on knitting a sweater.

A thousand crystal clear memories, swirling in a bittersweet dance.

“Maybe I should get you a better phone camera. That looks amazing,” Molly murmured, almost too quiet for him to hear.

Caleb took a deep breath, wincing at how much his chest shuddered. “Maybe… Maybe next year you could come with me.”

“I’d really love that, Caleb. You don’t have to do this alone.” Molly sounded perfectly sincere. Like he’d enjoy coming here with Caleb.

He could feel the tears brimming and beginning to roll down his cheeks.

“Would you tell me about them?” Molly asked, voice soft. Caleb knew he could say no. He could just sit here in silence if he wanted to, or ask Molly to talk about something else. Molly wouldn’t judge him.

But it sounded… nice. To keep them alive in someone else’s memory.

So he brought forward the image of his parents and himself on Winter’s Crest morning and told Molly the story of the original Frumpkin. Tears continued to stream down his face, but his voice didn’t waver.

When he finished he brought over the image of his mother tucking him into bed and told Molly the bedtime story from memory, bringing forth a dancing cat and a young boy in the amber projection. Frumpkin was watching curiously, but didn’t move from his spot purring on Caleb’s shoulders.

He talked until his voice was raw and hoarse, and Molly listened to every word.

There were more memories to relay, but eventually Caleb stopped. They could do this next year. They could probably do this next week, if Caleb asked Molly. For now, it was getting dark, and he should get home.

_Home._

His home hadn’t been this place in years. But the fact that he’d built a new home with Mollymauk brought more tears to his eyes. Some sad, some in grief, but some just in relief.

“I think… I think I’ll come back now,” Caleb said, letting the orange illusion fall away and leaving him in darkness. “It will take me awhile to walk from Yussa’s.”

“Stay safe, please. I’ll be here, or a few minutes away.”

Caleb stood and cracked his aching joints, letting Frumpkin stretch and explore for a few minutes before they left. He took a slow walk around the inside of the foundation, running his fingers over the scorched stones until he was standing before the gap that used to be the door to the backyard.

He stepped out into the garden, inspected the hydrangea that he’d planted, then stopped in front of the rosebush.

Chewing his lip, he picked off a few of the dead blooms, like he’d seen his mother do in his youth. She was so proud of these bushes.

Taking out his pocket knife, he found the perfect bud, just starting to bloom. Carefully he cut it away from the bush, and snipped off each of its thorns. It was beautiful, even as the sun disappeared completely and he was left in darkness.

He gave it to Frumpkin to hold while he drew the chalk circle against the charred stone foundation of his home, pulling away ivy here and there when necessary. After sending a quick message to Wensforth, he was standing in Tidepeak tower, the sun still setting here, casting the world in oranges and pinks, all sparkling over the water.

The walk back to the apartment was slow, methodical. Each step felt grounding, and he was grateful no one stopped him. He was sure his eyes were red and puffy, and that he probably just looked like shit. But no one stopped to talk to the wizard holding his cat and a rose.

Soon he was back at the door of his apartment, trying to get his keys to work and wondering if it would be worth the loud noise to just unlock the door magically. He’d taken the spell from one of the mage’s spellbooks, but the thundering noise it created had kept him from using it. Then the elevator door opened to reveal Molly, arms full of paper bags of takeout food.

He grinned from ear to ear and it was the best thing Caleb had ever seen. The wizard almost dropped his keys and went over to hug him, before he started talking, “Good! I was hoping to beat you back. But I also thought you’d be hungry. I hope Xhorasian is okay?”

Caleb swallowed, nodding and trading his keys for holding the food. With nimble fingers, Molly let them in with ease and took half the food to the counter. “I wasn’t sure what you’d want so I got a bunch of everything. We can just eat leftovers all week.”

He nodded, and his stomach growled as Molly opened up container after container. It was a wonder he was still upright.

Next year he’d bring food.

“I’m glad you’re hungry,” Molly said, smiling softly and leaning over to kiss him on the cheek. “And… Thank you. For staying safe. And calling me earlier. I’m glad to be a part of it, if that makes sense.”

Caleb nodded again. He didn’t really have the words, and luckily Molly didn’t seem to mind. Instead he called Frumpkin up onto the counter. 

“What have you got there, friend?” Molly asked, staying close but watching the cat.

Taking the rose that Frumpkin had been holding delicately for him, Caleb took a half step towards Mollymauk so the tiefling could see the rose for a moment. 

Molly’s voice grew softer, more reverent. “That’s beautiful, Caleb. Is it one of your mother’s?” He’d seen all the swirling amber scenes of Caleb’s mother in the garden, tending to the roses, weeding the flower beds, growing their own little plot of vegetables.

Caleb nodded and made sure all the thorns were completely gone before tucking it in Molly’s hair, making sure it wouldn’t slide away and keeping it snug against his horn. When he took a small step back to assess his work, Molly’s eyes were shining wet, surprised and open wide.

He lifted his hand to card through the purple curls that intermingled with the perfect white of the rose enjoying the soft tinkling of the charms on Molly’s horns as he did. They sounded like the windchimes his parents had hung out by the garden door, making pleasant noises with the slightest breeze.

They sounded like home.

Molly pulled him closer, tucking him against his chest and kissing his temple as he started rubbing slow circles on his back. It was warm and soothing, and for a moment Caleb pushed aside his hunger and let Molly support his weight.

Taking a deep breath, Caleb gathered all the words he had left.

“Danke, Mollymauk.”


	72. Birthday Bash

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cute birthday things! And a lil slice of angst just for fun <3

### Chapter 72: Birthday Bash

Molly was vibrating with excitement. Of course, he was trying to reign it in, since Caleb was still soundly asleep beside him, and of all days, Caleb definitely deserved to sleep in today. He’d planned what he hoped would be the perfect day, and it was all coming to fruition. Everyone was coming over this evening to watch a movie that he’d managed to smuggle in from Xhorhas. It was a rare documentary on Dunamancy that Caleb had read a small article about in one of his arcane journals.

Owing a favor to Yussa was going to be worth the look on Caleb’s face when he saw it. It was tricky getting his projector set up with the proper Tongues enchantment since none of them spoke Undercommon (or at least he and Caleb didn’t), but he’d tried it out a few times earlier this week to make sure everything would run smoothly. 

Everything needed to be perfect today.

Caleb had been quiet since he came back from Blumenthal. That night, when he’d come home, he only said two words. The next day he said a few more, but the man was completely emotionally wrung out. Once a week had passed and he was still quiet, Veth and Beau had come over on and off, checking in whenever Molly had to be at work while Caleb was at home.

They said he was getting better, it was all just slow. Being around people seemed to help though, so Molly wasn’t worried about the party. It was specifically designed to be low key, just a movie, then food. Plenty of excuses to be nice and quiet.

Molly was starting to realize why Caleb was never very excited about his birthday. It had to be hard to celebrate yourself a few weeks after what you considered to be the worst mistake of your life. And the death of your parents. Especially when he had no one to celebrate with for over four years.

So he was determined to make this day perfect.

Caleb deserved it, no matter how much he thought he didn’t.

Molly was determined to show Caleb how much he loved him without saying it. Him and all of his friends, they all wanted to make this a good day.

And part of that was Molly secretly sneaking over to turn off all of Caleb’s alarms on his phone so the man could sleep in for once. He’d get up at his own leisure, and Molly would have a chance to make something akin to breakfast, or hopefully brunch in bed.

Not that he could cook very well. 

He wasn’t _inept,_ just inexperienced. So he put on a cooking video in the kitchen, opened the window and put up a fan to draw any possible smells from the stove away from their bedroom. Burning something wasn’t part of his plan, but if anything was going to wake up Caleb, it would be that.

But he knew that Caleb showed people he cared with actions, and damn if Molly wasn’t going to try and show the wizard he was loved today. If he couldn't show him, there was no way Caleb would believe him when he said it.

He might have been making excuses to avoid the issue, but that was beside the point.

Besides, how hard was it to cook sausage and eggs?

It was the thought that counted. That and how he went halfway across the city to find Zemnian wurst and managed to hide it in a paper bag labeled "Molly's stash- do not disturb." Hopefully Caleb assumed it was drugs and hadn't snuck a peek. Or bother to ask if there were any drugs you needed to refrigerate.

Of course since the night Caleb almost died in the graveyard, Molly hadn't had anything stronger than a stiff drink.

But he got through breakfast with only one tossed set of burned toast, and everything else pretty passable. Frumpkin had started begging at his feet as soon as he put the meat in the pan, but Molly did his best to ignore him and not trip. Focus was the goal, not getting lost researching if sausage was good for cats, and if it mattered when the cat was a familiar.

Soon anyways, Molly was pushing open the door to the bedroom to view a sleep tousled Caleb, rubbing the sleep from his eyes. He grinned over the tray, “Good timing on my part?”

Caleb opened his mouth to speak and a growl from his stomach answered instead. Molly burst into giggles as his wizard flushed slightly. “It smells amazing, Mollymauk.”

“Should I sing? Or wait for Jester to embarrass you later?” Molly asked, propping the tray up and wedging a pillow behind Caleb’s back.

“Singing is done with candles,” Caleb said, already taking a bite.

Molly nodded, “Right, right, the weird arbitrary birthday rules.”

Caleb snorted, but didn’t stop eating. “Where did you get this sausage?”

“Uptown,” Molly said, tail flicking back and forth in excitement. “Are they good? The internet said they were the best Zemnian sausages in the city, but the internet is also full of lies.”

“It’s delicious,” Caleb said quickly, gently pushing the other plate Molly had made towards him.

Right. Eating. That was important. Molly balanced the plate on his lap beside Caleb as they ate, tail still flicking in unbridled excitement.

“And what exactly is the pot of dirt? Is that like Jester’s strange gummy worm puddings that look like soil?” Caleb asked, biting into a piece of toast.

Molly pushed his plate away and grabbed the pot, pulling it closer to them to show the little shoots. “Caduceus made it for you! I kind of helped, but not really. Apparently it’s really easy to grow more roses with a stem of them!” he said, unable to stop grinning as he showed the new life from the little cuttings. “Well, easy for Cad at least. I gave him your mother’s rose, so now we can have our own little pot of them right here.”

Caleb’s eyes broke away from the toast, setting it back on the plate and ghosting his hands over the pot instead. Molly had picked it out at Yasha’s shop, specifically grabbing the one with the amber swirls over the white glaze. Even though Caleb insisted he had no favorite color, Molly had noticed a strong fondness for that shade of orange.

“I’m going to give them back to Cad when he comes over today, but it’s part of our present to you. He said it’ll take time, but they’ll probably make a really good plant for the balcony after this winter. They’re really good sturdy, old roses, really healthy, he said. Your mom had every right to be proud.”

Caleb was staring at the pot, gathering it into his arms with all the reverence one would give an urn. “I… thank you. This is… Lovely. You’re lovely.”

“It was Cad and Yasha’s idea really, I was just going to preserve it. I messaged them about that, and they recommended this. Yasha’s gonna crash the apartment once we have it every once in a while to make sure we’re taking care of it.”

He smiled softly at the pot. “I could get another cutting too. If we’re that terrible. Maybe I could take Caduceus with us.”

“I think he’d love that,” Molly said, running a hand through Caleb’s hair and nudging a small box towards him. “But I did do something else too. Since it would die on your desk, apparently.”

Caleb carefully traded him the pot and took the box gingerly into his hands. “It’s heavy.”

“Yup! I think that’s the point of these things.”

“I should probably finish my breakfast,” Caleb mumbled, which encouraged Molly to grab his own plate and keep eating. Even though he was excited, he could just get these presents out of the way. Caleb opened up the paperweight with the perfect bloom suspended inside, captured forever in a clever enchantment that Molly had no idea how it worked. But Pumat had assured him it would never wilt or fade, even in the sunshine. Caleb was staring at it with wonder, silent.

“That one’s from Pumat. The enchantment should last for ages, unless it gets dispelled or something.”

“Is it… Is it suspended in time?” Caleb asked, eyes wide as he turned it in his hands.

Molly shrugged but pulled out the case for the Dunamancy documentary. One more present wouldn’t hurt anyone. “I honestly have no idea, but he did insist on being able to watch this before he made it. I’m sure he’d love to talk to you about it sometime.”

But Caleb wasn’t really listening, eyes wide as he stared at the case.

“How… How did you get this?”

A grin split Molly’s face as he took in Caleb’s awestruck expression. “I saw how excited you were that this even existed, so I found a copy.”

“But, I wouldn’t even begin to know-”

“I know all the same people you do, dear. I’m just not afraid to ask for what I want. Especially when I know I get to watch your face light up like that,” Molly said, his tail swishing back and forth behind him with excited pleasure.

“And everyone agreed to play nice when we watch it tonight. Mostly because I pointed out that Beau is just as much of a nerd as you are, and most of us actually do some kind of magic bullshit in some way or another. That and how you haven’t ever actually picked a movie for movie night, even though we’ve all seen _Tusk Love_ ten times now.”

Caleb seemed at a loss for words, trying to thank Molly a million times more over breakfast, but Molly wasn’t done yet. Those were the big gifts, but he had transformed their living room into a cat’s paradise after Caleb went to sleep last night.

He’d bought a ridiculously large and fancy cat tree from someone on Etsy who made them look like enchanted forests, along with a few different cat beds (some were for the other rooms, but he was letting Caleb move them around), and a bunch of new toys. The peacock feathers were irresistible, but he’d gotten all sorts of little things for Frumpkin to chase. He was going to look _so_ cute running around in Caduceus’s little knitted sweater later.

“And, look at this thing!” Molly said with a grin, thrusting the last box into Caleb’s hands. “I know you worry about leaving him alone here when you have to go to places that don’t allow cats, and you feel bad about putting him in the pocket dimension.”

“Was… What is it?” Caleb mumbled, turning the box over in his hands in confusion.

Molly helped him set it all up, downloading the app on Caleb’s phone quickly. “Now, hit that button.”

The machine spat out a treat, to Frumpkin’s delight, and Caleb stared wide eyed at the live camera feed of Frumpkin going to eat the little treat. “So I can watch him from anywhere?”

“Yeah! If you need a distraction out in public without him or something, you can even project your voice through it. You can tell him to act cute, and watch it all on your phone! Or just send him treats.” Molly grinned as Caleb proceeded to fire out three more treats for the cat, a wide grin spreading across his face.

By the time Molly had Caleb had finished with all his presents and sated with playing with Frumpkin, it was time for their friends to start showing up. Molly disappeared into the kitchen to clean up all the dirty dishes he’d neglected from breakfast as Veth invited herself in and practically climbed in Caleb’s lap to give him her present.

He could overhear how it was a pen enchanted to never leave Caleb’s desk, since people always stole any nice pens Veth got for him. Molly could hear all their friends by the time the dishes were rinsed of dried on scrambled egg and loaded in the dishwasher. A flash of blue alerted him to a fellow tiefling grinning and holding a towering cake. He raised a brow at Jester. There was no way they could eat that whole thing, but he could probably send some home with Veth for Luc.

Or just eat cake all week.

He was open to either option.

The rest of the afternoon was going smoothly, Caleb watching the Dunamancy documentary with more rapt attention than Molly had ever seen. Everyone was respectful, even if Jester and Veth were on their phones for half of it, and Yasha looked just as lost as Molly.

Molly… Molly was just watching Caleb. The way the blue light flashed in the dark living room lit up Caleb’s freckles in an interesting way, and he was so enraptured that Molly doubted an earthquake could move him from that spot. As soon as it was over, he was asking Molly if they would be able to watch it again soon, so he could take notes.

How could he possibly say no?

But Jester swooped in then with cake and singing, everyone swarming around Caleb and perking up after the relatively dry movie. Molly turned all the lights back on once the candles were blown out, a lingering air of smoke hanging before he cracked open the window.

Everyone settled down, talking over mouthfuls of cake and falling into easy chatter.

“Ich… Entschuldigung… I’ll- I’ll be right back,” Caleb mumbled, setting down the slice of cake and slipping away.

Beau made a crude joke about needing the bathroom just from seeing the cake and Molly could hear Caleb’s forced chuckle. He shot her a look, but it was too late. Caleb was already gone.

A bit impatiently, Molly waited for Caleb to come back, keeping an eye on the slice of cake left abandoned on the coffee table.

And he waited a bit more.

Then he checked his phone.

And waited five more minutes.

Then he got really fidgety, slipping away from everyone and just making sure that Caleb wasn’t actually sick in the bathroom. He could at least get him a glass of water. Or some medicine. Depending on what kind of sickness. Molly owed him that much after Caleb had taken care of him a few weeks ago.

But he wasn’t in the bathroom.

Or their work room.

“Caleb?” Molly asked, knocking and pushing open the bedroom door a crack. “You in here?” There was a sliver of panic that the wizard had disappeared, but he could hear a noncommittal sound from the bedroom that allowed him to keep breathing normally.

His pulse slowed as he made his way into the bedroom. “You alright in here?” he asked, trying to figure out where exactly his wizard was.

Unlike his old apartment, there was a gap between the bed and the wall, leaving two feet so that Caleb could climb into their bed without crawling over Molly. That and keeping the outlet uncovered for charging phones (and the fire hazard, as Caleb pointed out), had seemed important.

Caleb had wedged himself in that small space, facing the bed and curled up in a ball with Frumpkin around his neck. To answer Molly’s question, he gave a small shrug, but Molly could see the wetness of his wizard’s cheeks from across the room as he scrubbed his sweater sleeve across them.

_Fuck._

Somewhere along the way, Molly had fucked up.


	73. Überwältigend

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Caleb Widogast deserves nice things. He finds this hard to believe sometimes.

### Chapter 73: Überwältigend

“Caleb?” Molly asked, knocking from the hallway and pushing open the bedroom door a crack. “You in here?”

“You alright in here?” he asked, looking around as he tried to figure out where exactly Caleb was.

Caleb had sunk down by the side of the bed, a small corner that felt like the only quiet space he could find where he wasn’t bothering anyone in the apartment. He tried to scrub the tears that had escaped his eyes away before Molly saw him, but it didn’t really work.

But he’d been asked a question. And he certainly didn’t trust his voice. Caleb couldn’t manage much more than a shrug. He could feel his pulse beating under his skin, pounding much faster than normal.

“Can… Can I sit with you?” Molly asked, sounding unsure and a little crestfallen.

He only shrugged again. He’d upset someone else now, and that felt worse than anything. But after a few moments of thought, he nodded. Having Mollymauk close would be nice, he thought.

Wedging himself down so he was a few inches away from their legs touching, Molly chewed his lip, lost in thought at first. “Do you want me to send people home?”

Caleb shook his head quickly, so sudden that Frumpkin let out a worried little sound and butted at his cheek. He definitely didn’t want that. He didn’t want to ruin anyone’s night. He was already bothering Molly with all this nonsense. He should be able to deal with this.

He should have locked himself in the bathroom and claimed to be sick instead. That would have been easier to hide. But he’d chosen this in case someone needed the bathroom. He didn’t want to be a bother.

That had already failed.

“Is touching okay?” Molly asked, raising an arm. He _was_ kind of pinning Caleb in, but it was sort of nice to be in a small space that felt safe like this. It was quiet, mostly filled with Frumpkin purring. After the chaos his friends brought wherever they went, a little time in a small, simple place with one person was welcome.

Especially if that person was Molly.

He thought for a moment, then nodded, pulling Frumpkin down into his lap so Molly could slide an arm around his shoulders. Reaching over, Molly did just that and gave the familiar a little scratch under the chin with his other hand. Caleb knew he was bad off since the cat wasn’t even trying to complain about wearing the little matching hoodie Caduceus had knitted for him.

“Is it something one of us did?” his voice sounded so miserable that Caleb’s stomach turned.

Caleb shook his head again, almost knocking into Molly’s horns this time. “Nein- No. Not really. Together it’s all just very… überwältigend. Overwhelming.”

His brain was still racing at all the kind things his friends, his _family,_ had done for him today, things they’d clearly been planning for ages. He didn’t even know how Molly had managed to get the documentary on Dumanancy. It looked to be straight from the movie theater, if the projector he’d rented to go with it was any indication. It was wonderful, and everything he could have dreamed of. So of course it was too much.

“Should I have spread it out more? Had your party the next week or something?” Molly asked. “Or was it just the party?”

“All of you… going out of your way like this. Spending money, taking the time to propagate the rose, that enchantment for the bloom, all the presents, the cake, everything… It’s still hard to think I can deserve this,” Caleb said, the words a bit gruff in his throat. He wanted to tell Mollymauk to go back to the party, to enjoy himself. To not get dragged down with him.

Molly made a sad sort of sound as he pulled Caleb closer, leaning him into his chest. “You know what, Caleb?”

He hummed in response, enjoying the warmth of the tiefling wrapped around him. He could hear Beau and Jester whooping with laughter in the living room.

“I’m not sure that’s exactly up to you.”

“I… I’m not sure I understand.”

“I mean, of course we can do something more low key next year. Or more spread out, or whatever you need. But I think it’s up to your friends to show as much affection as they seem to deem you worthy of, you know?”

Caleb swallowed, controlling his breathing better now that he could match it to the slow rise and fall of Molly’s chest, perfectly in time with the lazy circles being drawn on his shoulder and upper arm. Of course it made sense, from a rational standpoint, but his mind wasn't operating in the most rational way at the moment.

“Do you trust us?” Molly asked.

Without hesitation, Caleb said, “With my life.”

And that was the big difference between the Nein and his friendships with Astrid and Wulf. He’d cared about those two, cared for them like family, cared for Astrid unlike any other. But he’d never trusted them. He knew trusting them wasn’t safe.

Putting his trust in the Mighty Nein felt like the safest bet he could ever make.

“Then shouldn’t you trust us to give you what we think you deserve? You’re not lying to any of us, you’re not hiding anything that would suddenly make us all leave, and none of us think you’re the monster you make yourself out to be. It’s not up to you to decide what Veth got you for your birthday, or any of the rest of us,” Molly said, choosing each word carefully and rubbing small circles on Caleb’s upper arm the whole time.

“I… I suppose. Veth has always seen too much good in me,” Caleb mumbled, taking a deep breath. It was a bit easier to think about it being out of his hands. This wasn’t exactly something he brought upon himself. Just another example of the endless compassion of his friends.

Molly only chuckled, “I think Veth is quite a good judge of character, actually. She was just the right amount of suspicious of me. How you won Beau over, I’ll never know.”

“That is a mystery to me as well. I think she needed someone who hated the Empire as much as she did in her life. And a brother who isn’t in Kamordah.”

He blinked and pulled away to meet Caleb’s gaze. “Beau has a brother?”

“Ja. He’s cute. The rest of the family… not so much.”

In all honesty, if Caleb didn’t know how much it hurt to have your family taken from you, he probably would have killed Thoreau Lionett already. But Molly wasn’t pressing, and that wasn’t really what they were talking about.

“Do you want to stay in here for a while?” Molly asked after a moment of silence.

Caleb winced as he heard Veth screech at something in the living room. “Maybe… Maybe just for a few more minutes.”

“Of course,” Molly said, pressing a kiss to his temple. “Here or in the bed?”

He chewed his lip a moment. “Bed, I suppose.” His legs were straining a bit, and he didn’t really want to keep Molly stuck on the floor. He could get up for Molly.

“Perfect. Up we go.” And with that, Molly scooped his other arm under Caleb’s legs and plopped him onto the bed.

He managed not to yelp in surprise, but still stared wide eyed at Molly. The ridiculous tiefling in question only grinned and jumped onto the bed, dragging Caleb back into his chest. “Grounding stuff? Cozy stuff? Distractions? I'm sure Jester would be happy to help with that one."

"What kind of stuff is cozy stuff?" Caleb asked.

Molly hummed, "Like… How there's no reason for you to need to wear a button down today. Here."

And Molly tossed him the purple hoodie, and a soft tee shirt to change into instead. “And you could take off the pants for sweats, if you wanted.”

“I think this is fine,” Caleb mumbled, though it was mostly swallowed inside the plum fabric. Molly must have stolen it while he was at work. It smelled like him again.

“As for other cozy stuff, I think warm drinks are always good. I’m sure Jester is dying to set up that fancy coffee machine she bought for you. I think it makes decaf and hot chocolate too, if you’re not in the mood for caffeine. She wanted to make sure I know how to make your favorite order from the café, so you can have it on your days off while still being lazy.”

Caleb nodded, sinking his fingers into the large middle pocket of the hoodie as Frumpkin made himself at home around his neck in the hood. “Decaf sounds good for now.”

Molly grinned and squeezed him carefully around the middle, not dislodging either arm, then kissed his forehead. “I’ll be two minutes, yeah? Count your breaths until I come back?”

He nodded.

He could do that.

And he did, not even getting to a minute and thirty seconds before Molly came back. Caleb could hear soft music coming from the living room now, everyone a touch quieter now that Jester was in the kitchen, wrestling the coffee machine with Caduceus beside her, who had found out that it also made tea. 

After a moment, he realized that what was playing was one of the Infernal albums Molly had shown him. It wasn’t exactly calm music, so it was upbeat enough for a small party. But it was grounding in a way that Caleb hadn’t been expecting, and he almost cried again before he made it back to his seat in the living room.

Veth seemed to have a sixth sense for when he wasn’t feeling well, perching up on the arm of the loveseat so she could pet Frumpkin. She started asking questions about the documentary, pulling a small smile to his face as they discussed the new forms of magic, and how she could use them at the bakery. It would be very helpful to make a display case that was paused in time, keeping pastries as fresh as the second they came out of the oven.

Caleb would need to talk to Pumat about it, as he was no enchanter himself, but it sounded doable. It would certainly put _Divine Delights_ ahead of the competition in terms of quality. He needed to meet with the firbolg anyway. After visiting Blumenthal, he’d been avoiding sessions. But today he sent the man a text and set up an appointment for the next week.

Hopefully they could talk about magic for part of the session so he didn’t get completely emotionally wrung out.

Veth ruffled his hair when she saw what he was doing. “Good. He’s a good man. Very… gentle.”

“Ja,” he mumbled, trying to fix all the hair she’d knocked out of his ponytail.

She rolled her eyes and scooped Frumpkin up to put him in Caleb’s lap. “Turn. I’ll braid it.”

Soon he had her fingers weaving through his hair, a cup of hot coffee in his hands, and a purring cat in his lap.

“So,” Veth started, patting his shoulder to let him know his hair was done, “Luc’s birthday is coming up too. And he keeps asking if Uncle Caleb is going to be there?”

“And where is ‘there’?” he asked, raising a brow.

“Well he made a new friend, a kenku girl who’s a little nervous about big crowds. She’s a foster kid who just started at his school, and they’ve been hanging out a lot over summer break. And Luc found out she’s never been to the water park.”

“Luc wants me to go to a water park?” Caleb wasn’t exactly a fan of the idea.

Veth nodded, “He told his friend about how his mom’s best friend is shy too, and still goes fun places. He wants to go early, on a random weekday, so it’s not super crowded for her. It’s cute, and she’s really sweet. You’ll like her.”

“So Luc is using me for social leverage now? Smart kid,” he said, watchin Veth beam with pride. “I suppose I can show up. Wait for them at the bottom of slides and things.”

“Slides?” Jester asked, eyes lighting up. “Can we come too?”

“Now, we don’t want to overwhelm the poor girl. That’s the opposite of the point of this,” Fjord said carefully.

Veth thought for a minute. “If she meets you all beforehand, she might be okay. She’s just worried people will be mean to her, is what Luc said.”

“We can protect her!” Jester said, grinning from ear to ear. “If anyone tries to be mean to her, I’ll knock them out with a lollipop!”

“Maybe. If you promise to behave.”

“No promises,” Molly said with a grin, then rolled his eyes at the resulting glare. “Kidding, kidding. I’ll try my best.”

“May we come too?” Yasha asked, surprising Beau beside her.

Veth nodded, “Of course! As long as Beau promises not to swear.”

“What? That’s like, impossible,” she grumbled, blushing as Yasha talked quietly about it being a fun date.

Caduceus said, “I’ve never been to a water park. Is it fun?”

“They’re much better here than in the Empire, that’s for sure!” Veth grinned. “Everything there is human sized, so firbolgs and goliaths can’t really enjoy them. But in Nicodranas, the stuff is big enough for pretty much anyone to go on. Luc thinks it’s the best thing in the world, even though he isn’t tall enough to ride half of it yet.”

“Well, I’m in.” Molly said, “I haven’t gotten to wear my swimsuit at all yet this summer. We’ve been way too busy.”

“Oh, after the park gets crowded we can just walk down to the beach!” Jester said, clapping her hands in excitement. 

Caduceus was smiling his lazy smile he gave whenever everyone around him was happy. “Maybe we could make a picnic lunch for everyone, Fjord.”

Fjord nodded, certainly amenable to that. The conversation turned to types of food and Caleb focused on the music around him instead.

He smiled into his coffee cup, much calmer now. If his friends thought he deserved their affections, he could take them. Especially when soon he’d be dragged on a million different water slides. It almost felt like the world was in balance.


	74. I am Very Sweet!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> waterpark shenanigans and Caleb being a goofball

### Chapter 74: I am Very Sweet

Luc’s friend, Kiri, was adorable. The second the bird saw Caleb at the water park, dressed down in just his book holsters over a tee shirt and a pair of orange plaid swim trunks, she ran to his side, pulling out a similar notebook and showing how they matched.

Caleb was confused at first, then broke out into a small smile as he let her show him her notebook and the list of helpful phrases written out at the beginning, like if she ever got lost or needed to call her foster parents, the Schusters. He just patted his spellbook, keeping it safe but summoning his dancing lights and making them spin around her head for a minute. 

Following up on her other side, Jester started giving Kiri new things to say. Jester’s suit was two pieces but long enough to cover her stomach, ending in a little pink skirt that was covered in white flowers and little butterflies. The little blue tiefling Molly was starting to think of like a sister looked like she might burst with excitement as the little girl said, “My name is Kiri, I’m very sweet!” and attempted a curtsey, even though she had no matching skirt.

It was adorable.

Eventually Luc found a map of the rides, mapping out everything he wanted to do while people put their clothes into lockers and put on sunscreen. Luc had worn his trunks covered in little dinosaurs the entire time, like Caleb, and Kiri just had shorts over the gingham yellow one piece she seemed to have borrowed from Veth, who almost matched in her solid yellow one. Molly was very proud to reveal his swim trunks that glittered almost as much as he did, with Gustav Klimt’s _Kiss_ down the side and the rest in shiny gold. But he was going to have to spend a few minutes unhooking all the jewelry from his horns, until Jester swooped in to save him so long as he helped with hers.

Caduceus and Fjord were the ones grabbing lockers with everyone’s pooled coin, both in solid trunks, though unlike Cad’s teal ones, Fjord’s navy blue ones had stitched on anchors in white thread if you looked close enough at the waistband. Beau and Yasha looked like they might as well have been at the gym, in blue and black suits that just looked like sports bras and gym shorts. For all Molly knew, they were. Gym clothes were pretty much waterproof, if you bought the nice kind. In the end they mostly just needed to lock up their phones, wallets, and shoes in the lockers, with a small pile of crumpled clothes cradling some jewelry.

Kiri looked lost about giving up her little notebook, shifting nervously from foot to foot until Caleb put a hand on her shoulder.

“I’m going to put my books in this necklace while we swim, so I can have them with me no matter what,” he said, holding up the little chunk of amber that had joined his anti scrying necklace. “Would you like yours in here too, in case you want it while we’re in the park?”

She nodded eagerly, making a happy clicking noise and handing over the little notebook and her pencils. It looked like Jester had already managed to give the girl two glittering gel pens to accompany the original pencil. Molly snuck over and slipped his phone into the pile with a wink, and Jester soon asked if Caleb could carry the keys to the lockers too. He just nodded, taking a minute to sort everything out while Molly spread sunscreen over his tattoos. Caleb was casting quickly today, since it didn’t seem like there were any terrible dangers at the water park. That, and to do the rituals he did to conserve energy usually used the spellbook he was currently encasing in amber.

It wasn’t long before everyone was slathered in sunscreen, Jester even insisting to put some on Caduceus’s nose where there was no fur, but unable to convince Kiri that she should put it on her beak. Luc started them on a long journey through all the rides, holding hands with Veth at times in bigger crowds. Molly couldn’t help but notice Kiri mimicking the same with Caleb, or Jester when the wizard wasn’t available.

It was almost too adorable to handle. And the kids were fun to talk to, enjoying playing with the taller adults and convincing Yasha to vault them into the air over the pool. She was confused, but obliging, flinging them with great vigor.

After splashing in the pool for a good hour, Luc declared it was ice cream time and proceeded to tell everyone how the freeze dried ice cream was what astronauts ate. They had no candles, so after singing happy birthday to Luc he blew a flame off Caleb’s finger. They all found places to sit near the edge of the pool, eating the strange spherical ice cream and soaking up the sun. Kiri was sitting next to Luc and Caleb on a bench, eating the dippin’ dots and beginning to repeat something as Caleb complained about his wet hair. Molly recognized his own voice.

“Mr. Caleb looks good soaking wet, huh?”

He looked away quickly before he heard Caleb choking on his own ice cream. Luc was asking, “Does that mean that Mr. Mollymauk likes you, Uncle Caleb?”

Kiri parroted her friend, and if a bird could grin, she definitely was.

“I believe so, Luc,” Caleb said, and Molly was pointedly staring at his ice cream, not listening in at all.

“And do you like him?”

“I do. You already know we live together, right, Luc?”

The boy hummed, mouth full of ice cream, “Uh huh! Mom told me you moved away from Beau’s house cuz she’s a bitch.”

“A bitch!” Kiri said cheerfully, while Veth started chastising them.

She called over, “Don’t teach Kiri swears!”

“But you taught me that one, Mom!” Luc pouted, and Molly snuck a look just to see the expression with the boy’s mouth full of ice cream. 

Beau was shrugging, “I mean, she’s not exactly _wrong.”_

“Anyways, Uncle Caleb, do you live together like my mom and dad? Or like roommates?”

“Well, we’re not married, Luc, if that’s what you’re asking,” Caleb said, skirting around the question.

Molly was quite grateful no one was trying to talk to him, since everyone was focused on whatever Jester was saying while he was eavesdropping. He had no idea what his expression was, and he didn’t want anyone to look over and find out, since it had to be far from a poker face.

“But you like him?”

“Ja.”

“And you sleep in one bed?”

A pause. How old was Luc again? “Ja.”

“Are you gonna get married?”

Molly was the one to choke at that, assuring Yasha he was fine as she pounded him on the back. It was loud enough that he almost missed Caleb’s quiet answer.

“I’m not sure, Luc. I think… I think that I’m very lucky, and I don’t want to push that luck. Not right now.”

“Well, _I_ think you two should get married. He’d look pretty in a white dress.”

“Get married! He’d look pretty!” Kiri repeated, and Molly was sure he was blushing in his ice cream. He took another spoonful of the weird gingerbread spheres and prayed to the Moonweaver that the cold would counteract the blush.

But it just got even worse when he heard Caleb say in a very quiet voice, “He would look quite pretty.”

He had to stand up.

He had to… do something.

Something ended up being tackling Beau into the nearest pool, cackling as she glared with no real malice in her eyes. “Oh, you’re gonna pay for that, Tealeaf-”

“Make me, Beauregard,” he taunted, full of unbridled energy and grinning wide at the fact that the lifeguard had been stopping two kids from running instead of watching them break all the rules.

Sure, Caleb thinking he’d look pretty in white was a far cry from being ready to exchange wedding vows, but it was still more than Molly was hoping to hear about on a lazy morning at the waterpark. So there was no way he could stay still, tail flicking back and forth with wild energy as he convinced Fjord to help him organize a chicken fight.

He climbed on Fjord’s shoulders, pushing at Beau seated on Yasha’s and cackling as Jester showed up riding on Caduceus’s shoulders. She was far too tall and too strong up there, knocking them both off with ease and screaming about “team cleric” while pumping her fists wildly (and mildly suggestively) into the air. Caduceus got unsteady then, stumbling and knocking her into the water with a waterlogged apology.

It was then that Molly snuck a glance at Caleb, staring at them all with the softest goddamn look on his face. Luc was tugging him towards the pool, trying to convince Kiri to join them and get on Caleb’s shoulders. She finally relented and Molly felt a tap on his shoulder.

“Mr. Mollymauk?”

He grinned, turning to the little halfing boy who had his hands clasped nervously behind his back. “Mr. Luc, how can I help you, sir?”

“Could I get on your shoulders? You’re the best height to fight with Uncle Caleb.”

Molly nodded, schooling his face into a serious expression. “Of course, but there’s two rules, okay?”

Luc nodded, face just as serious. “Anything you say, mister. It’s your shoulders.”

“Number one: don’t tug too hard on my horns. And number two: show no mercy!” he said, breaking out into a grin as he scooped up the giggling halfling.

As he lumbered over to Kiri, who was currently giggling in a strange series of clicks, he took one of Luc’s ankles in each of his hands and shot Caleb a grin. “Funny meeting you here, Mr. Caleb.”

“I’m not sure you are supposed to talk during a war,” Caleb said, completely deadpan and making Molly snort. But there was a wicked glint in his eye as he wiped a little ice cream from Molly’s cheek. “Gingerbread?”

“And if it is?” Molly asked, completely not expecting the rush of arcane energy that filled his body, making each of his limbs feel like lead and slowing him down.

Caleb grinned from ear to ear. “Guess there was some real molasses in there.”

“Mr. Mollymauk!” Luc wailed out, almost stumbling on his shoulders as Caleb started laughing at him with a now triumphant looking Kiri.

Molly huffed, “Sorry, Luc! Uncle Caleb decided to cheat!”

Even his words were slowed, Luc scoffing in indignation. “Uncle Caleb, that’s not fair!”

“All’s fair in a proper war, Luc. Remember that next time you’re up against your mother!” Caleb called out, helping Kiri get Luc more off balance as Veth started to splash them all from the side of the pool.

“Don’t worry, Luc, two can play at this game,” Molly said, winking at Caleb as he used a pointed fingernail to nick right behind his ear. He felt the blood begin to flow, of course it didn’t matter where he’d been cut. This ability always made the one on his neck bleed.

But it was worth it to blind Caleb for a minute, making the redhead stumble enough for Luc to tug both himself and Kiri into the water with a huge splash and a fit of giggles.

Molly moved to slide an arm around Caleb’s waist and dropped the blindness after a quick kiss to his scruffy cheek. “Who would have thought our wizard fought so dirty?”

“I’m scrawny; I fight dirty or I lose,” Caleb said with a shrug, but still leaned into Molly’s shoulder. “Thank you for not making me bleed from my eyes; that might have scared the children.”

“I think Luc would have liked it,” Molly said with a shrug. “Vicious little one, for being so sweet.”

Caleb looked pointedly at Veth. “No amount of Yeza’s genes could tamper that completely. You should see the boy with a crossbow.”

“We should babysit someday, taking him to the shooting ranges. I’d like to see that.”

Snorting, Caleb shook his head, “If you tell Veth you’re willing to babysit pro bono, you’ll never get a moment of peace ever again.”

“Well, it would be fun once or twice, if she ever asks. You’re good with kids,” Molly said, resting his chin on Caleb’s shoulder and closing his eyes in the sun.

Caleb hummed softly. “I had good examples when I was younger.”

“I’m glad. I can’t imagine I did, ending up in a grave before I hit thirty,” Molly said with a shrug. “Course, I could’ve just been an asshole.”

He shook his head, a smile on his voice. “If anything, I think Yasha is your parent. Or perhaps Gustav. They seem like fine examples, but you’re still an asshole.”

“I suppose so,” Molly said, smiling over at Luc and falling quiet.

“Should I knock Beauregard over again?” Caleb asked after a moment of silence.

“Absolutely. How? You want to flank her?”

He chuckled then spoke an incantation, the swirl of magic lifting his hair with that unseen wind and making his eyes light up in the way that Molly loved. Caleb looked so ethereal with the magic swirling around him and the reflection of the blue water making his blue eyes and fiery hair stand out even more, Molly almost forgot to look at Beau, sudden lifted ten feet straight up out of the pool and then dropped back down in a massive splash that sent water careening over the sides.

“You’re _dead,_ Widogast!” she screamed, coughing up water but grinning from ear to ear.

Caleb winked at Molly and immediately did it again. Veth and Jester were cackling, and even Fjord and Caduceus were laughing from their places in the pool.

“Me next!” Jester said, hopping up and down in excitement.

He obliged, and she curled into a cannonball as Caleb dropped her from at least fifteen feet in the air, splashing everyone in the pool. Beau had recovered by then, catching both Molly and Caleb in a headlock and dunking them under the water with her.

A shrill whistle rang out over the pool while the lifeguard finally caught on to the antics happening with their group.

Caduceus cleared his throat and started apologizing. “I think it’s about time for us to head out anyways, folks. We need real food instead of ice cream.”

There was a small grumbling, but most consented, especially after hearing Kiri’s stomach growling. The lifeguard was watching them like a hawk now, arms crossed as they made sure every one of the Mighty Nein got out of the pool and stopped rough housing.

Molly grabbed Caleb’s hand to help him out of the pool, but he couldn’t help but see the twist of his fingers leading to Beau tripping as she got out and falling back in the water one last time with a string of curses that Kiri promptly began repeating. And how could Molly not kiss the smug look off his face?


	75. Beach Day

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Beach days are always ridiculously long and fun, full of way too much stuff

### Chapter 75: Beach Day

At the beach and with only Jester permanently banned from the waterpark (they didn’t appreciate becoming the _Clovis Concord Cock_ instead of _Cove,_ though Jester insisted it wasn’t even her best work), they began to relax completely. Caduceus somehow remained the best maker of sandwiches Caleb had ever met, and Luc and Kiri were very excited to rise to Molly’s challenge of building the tallest sandcastle ever.

They even looked up the world record online, just to be sure. Upon finding out that the record was held by a 54 foot tall behemoth, the kids weren’t deterred, just determined to work faster before the tide came in. Soon everyone was helping, and the castle was turning into something of a fort that the kids, and Veth, could actually fit inside.

Caleb was considering using another spell so he could polymorph into something small enough to go inside the fort. Then he saw a face headed straight towards them that made him want to save any spells he had left. He was cursing himself for wasting so many this morning, with all the uses of the amber, the slow spell, and the telekinesis.

“Jester, walk with me a moment?” Caleb asked, feeling Molly look up beside him curiously. He didn’t look down. With luck, he could sneak over with Jester before Fjord noticed.

The blue tiefling looked up in surprise, covered in sand, but took his extended hand. “Sure, Caleb! What’s up?”

“I think I see some sea glass. Buddy system, right?”

“Right!” Luc said, grinning as he took Kiri’s hand and some buckets to get more water. Yasha and Veth trailed after them, and though Caleb didn’t like the look of everyone splitting up, he didn’t want to cause alarm. Not yet.

Jester shrugged and stood up with him as he wound his way towards the elven woman quickly making her way towards their party. Caleb could vaguely hear Fjord calling out behind them, but it was quiet. They would have a few seconds first, and a few seconds would hopefully be all that was needed.

“Excuse me, miss?” Caleb called, trying to stand in the woman’s path.

She sent him a look, “Do I know you?”

“Ah, I’m not sure. Are you a Miss Avantika?” Caleb could feel Jester’s hand tense in his own for a moment before she recovered.

Her eyes flashed as she seemed to really take him in for the first time. “Can I help you?”

“Well, I’m here with my friends, and, now, I’d rather not have any outsiders dominating the conversation. It’s the boy’s birthday.” His head inclined towards Luc, but he felt Jester squeeze his hand again in confirmation. She knew what they were trying to do. Hopefully Avantika didn’t think anything of his strange word choice.

Caleb was just hoping Jester had everything she needed if he failed.

Avantika said, “Look I don’t have time for this-”

Just as Caleb was holding the snake’s tongue and the honey comb behind his back, saying, “I’d really suggest you leave us alone today.”

She turned to glare at him, waving her hand with a quick counterspell. His heart sank as the spell didn’t take, but he’d distracted her for a moment at least. “I don’t need you interfering now; this is between me and Fjord-”

Then she stopped, a little slack jawed as Jester started casting something at his side. A little shudder ran through him as he realized exactly what spell it was. He’d heard those arcane words before; he'd even found the spell in the Volstrucker’s books. He couldn’t copy them for his own. He knew it was necessary, but it was a little disconcerting to see in the moment. 

After a long, near agonizing few seconds, the elven woman stamped her foot and started stalking away from them angrily, her trek away looking much less intimidating with the sinking of her boots into the pristine whitish sand. She was gone then, Fjord finally catching up to them, Beau at his side. “What-What did you guys do?”

“I sent her away,” Jester said, sighing softly in relief.

Caleb nodded slowly, keeping her hand and squeezing it gently in reassurance. She’d done the right thing, even if he thought he might need to sit down soon. “And what did you make her remember? He has a right to know.”

“I…” She nervously shifted from one foot to the other, “I can reverse it quickly, if you want me to, Fjord. Just, Luc and Kiri are over there.”

“It’s okay, Jessie. I just want to know.” Fjord’s look of panic was beginning to leave his face as Avantika continued further away from them.

Jester nodded, “I made her think that you told her you threw that dumb cloven crystal eyeball thingy into the fire elemental plane, in a volcano. Hopefully she’ll get there and think it melted when she can’t locate the thing there, then leave you alone. Or we can deal with her later. But I think it should distract her for a while.”

Tension left Fjord’s face and his shoulders fell. “Oh… That’s… That’s really smart, Jessie. Thank you.”

She let out a little laugh in relief, and Caleb let go of her hand so she could go run to take Fjord’s instead.

Caleb smiled after them after Beau punched his shoulder. “Hey, I know what you were trying to do, but bring me next time too.”

He nodded, squeezing her shoulder quickly, “I will. I promise.”

Her shoulders dropped then. “Now, let’s go finish up that castle. Kiri started yawning like ten minutes ago but won’t leave until the moat is done.”

Caleb assented, following along and wondering if he could use the fabricate spell for something. In the end he used it to make a few raised letters, right in front of the moat. _The Mighty Nein._ Of course trying to explain a Zemnian pun to two kids was difficult, but it made for a fun conversation on the way home.

Though the day was physically exhausting, and a bit tense with Avantika, as soon as he was back with everyone and Mollymauk took his hand while they walked away from the beach, he felt calmer. He didn’t even have to feel embarrassed about staring at the sun gleaming off Molly’s tattoos. Beau and Jester had both given up on teasing them after the fourth time Molly insisted on reapplying sunscreen to Caleb’s pale skin.

He would probably still burn, but it was worth it.

With the chlorine rinsed out of his hair and clean pajamas on, he was more than happy to curl up with Mollymauk and watch whatever horrible reality television show the tiefling could find. When there was little attention on him, it was getting easier and easier for Caleb to relax and enjoy time with his friends. With his new family.

Even Jester casting the spell didn’t ruin his good mood completely. He was glad they went home not too late afterwards, but it had been a full day already. Full enough that he had to wake up Molly from sleeping in his lap so they could slip into bed.

He was sleeping soundly within minutes, with soft dreams of crashing surf and giggling children. So he was very confused as to why he was suddenly awake in the middle of the night. He blinked a few times, trying to gather stock of the situation. It was dark, and late. 3:32 in the morning and he could barely see Frumpkin hopping away from Caleb’s pillow and moving into his lap.

Mollymauk was having a nightmare.

Mollymauk was having such a nightmare that he was groaning in pain in his sleep, thrashing enough to wake Caleb, but not waking up himself. It was like the dream he’d had when he was sick a few weeks ago, but seemed even worse tonight.

Caleb whispered softly, trying to wake him without startling him, “Molly. You’re having a bad dream.”

Nothing.

He ran a careful hand through Molly’s hair, trying to calm him. Molly always liked contact, at least so far, and seeing him like this was torture.

But as soon as Molly was touched, his eyes flew open, glowing bright red in the room. A red light was shining around the small bedroom, steadily growing brighter as the eyes on Molly’s tattoos began to glow with the same red light. The tapestries hanging on the walls were cast in a monochromatic red hue as Molly stopped thrashing, breathing heavily with eyes wide.

Frumpkin had skittered off the bed, hackles raised as he backed away from the tiefling.

Caleb swallowed, his hand freezing in Molly’s hair. “Molly?” he whispered.

No response.

Just the bright red glow of his eyes, his tattoos, illuminating the room brighter and brighter. He wasn’t moving a muscle now, stock still except for the heaving breaths shaking through his chest.

Caleb’s mind raced. He should call Jester or Caduceus. This was definitely not normal. This was something from Molly’s past that looked just as dangerous and wild as his own.

But he was frozen, watching, counting, not wanting to break the silence and not wanting to call anything too soon. He had healing potions stashed in his coat that was hanging over the chair beside him, and even a spare vial of antitoxin after everything they saw in the Empire, but this didn’t seem like any normal ailment. This was some arcane thing that was beyond him.

Under his breath he cast detect magic, trying to figure out at least something about this. His hands shook as he traced the familiar glyphs in the air. Finding that this was some old magic that he didn’t even recognize the school of scared him more.

When Molly’s eyes blinked rapidly, the light flickering and disappearing from the room, two minutes and thirty seven seconds later, Caleb felt himself unwind in relief. When Molly started gasping, he was there, winding a hand through his hair again and taking the tiefling who collapsed into his arms with ease.

“Molly, are you… are you with me? Can I help?” Caleb asked, trying to wrap his head around what the fuck had just happened.

He shuddered in Caleb’s grasp, shaking his head a moment. “I… It was a nightmare, I think. It felt really real. Really surreal. It was a city, but it was alive. It was _talking_ to me, but I couldn’t understand what it was saying.”

Caleb rubbed his back in small circles, nodding. “Is there anything else you can remember? You didn’t understand anything?”

“There was a lot of red… It was calling me a vessel, I think? It was saying all these words I didn’t understand. Nonagon? Somno something? It seems so dumb now, I don’t know why it scared me so much.” Molly was pulling back a bit, rubbing tears from his eyes.

He chewed his lip for a moment, but decided the truth was important. It needed to be dealt with, not avoided. At least they could both be as well informed as possible. Caleb no longer kept secrets about his past from Molly when he asked. “I have a few guesses why you were frightened. But before that, is there anything else you can tell me about the dream? Anything distinguishing?”

Molly was silent for a moment, abandoning his attempts to laugh it off. “It was… hungry. I don’t… I don’t know.”

“That’s alright, just breathe with me a moment,” Caleb coached him through a few deep breaths until Molly’s tensed muscles relaxed in his grip.

Caleb could see Molly’s eyes growing heavy again, chewing his lip. “Would you like to talk about this now, or tomorrow? I think it could be important.”

“I mean I don’t think there’s much more to say, it all sounded like gibberish,” Molly mumbled, sounding more awake at least. He leaned over the side of the bed to stick a hand out to Frumpkin, who was still shivering in the corner. Caleb instructed the familiar to at least come back onto the bed.

He sighed softly, brain spinning in wild circles. They might as well get all this out in the open now. “Your, um, tattoos. The eyes, the ones you said won’t take ink, and your actual eyes. They were glowing. I think there’s a strong likelihood that this has something to do with your past.”

Caleb felt a shiver run through Molly’s body and he pulled him closer again. Into the crook of Caleb’s neck he mumbled, “Fuck.”

He held him like he could shield him from whatever this was with his body alone. “You’re helping me with my past, ja? I will study this; we can make sure everything is okay. We can make sure your past stays in the past.”

Molly nodded but only curled closer, still trembling just slightly. “I… Yeah. I’d like that. I think I need that.”

“It only makes sense that I repay the favor, Mollymauk. And you know I’m quite good at research.”

The tiefling snorted, but Caleb could feel his shoulder growing damp.

“Do you think you’ll go back to sleep or would you like to get up and do something?” Caleb asked, rubbing slow circles in his back.

Molly hummed, quiet for a moment. “What time is it?”

“Seven minutes of four.”

“What would we do?” Molly asked, sounding resigned.

Caleb thought for a moment. “I mean we could always watch crummy television. But we do live in a city, and the two of us together are practically a walking army. It’s not exactly dangerous to go out this late. Or early. We could go for a walk, or find a 24/7 diner if you need something more distracting.”

“That… that sounds nice.”

He kissed the crown of Molly’s head, had Frumpkin hop up on his shoulders, and grabbed the hoodie that was now his. Caleb was torn about giving it back at this point. It was very comfortable, but it didn’t quite smell like Mollymauk anymore.

But it did give him an idea, and he went to grab his softest cardigan for Molly to slip into. Hopefully he’d appreciate the sentiment, and the oversized garment. It had long sleeves and it closed with buttons so the loose weave couldn’t get caught in his horns. And seeing Molly swaddled in his clothes was surprisingly satisfying.

“I understand why you were smelling my hoodie while your head was all messed up now. This is lovely,” Molly mumbled, hugging himself in the big cardigan.

A deep pink flush, darker than usual now that he was used to most of Molly’s antics, colored Caleb’s cheeks. “I did what?”

“It was sweet, don’t worry. It’s better than finding out I smell bad, dear.”

He nodded, falling quiet but able to smile gently as Molly kissed his cheek and took his hand. Gently he squeezed it back, resolving to fix this for Molly. He swore it to himself as they stopped inside the elevator and he cupped Molly’s cheek and kissed him once, just chastely before leaning their foreheads together. Before he could put any of it into words (how he wanted to keep him safe, make him feel protected, how he’d do anything) the elevator dinged and they walked out together wordlessly into the night.


	76. Nine Eyes and Diner Food

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A love letter to living in cities and doing tarot readings for loved ones <3

### Chapter 76: Nine Eyes and Diner Food

There was a special kind of feeling walking in a city so late at night that it was really morning. Cities like Nicodranas were never exactly _quiet,_ but as the wee hours of the morning crept on, there was a strange stillness that settled over everything, save a cab racing to the airport or the occasional bus. Sometimes Molly loved the hustle and bustle of the city during rush hour, but it could get suffocating in its own right.

This was completely foreign to him, walking hand in hand with Caleb to a diner in his pajama pants and slippers with a scimitar at his waist, just so he could feel prepared. The cardigan Caleb had given him was unreasonably soft and smelled exactly like his wizard. Old books, woodsmoke, and that faint smell of cinnamon that clung to the bakery. Caleb had stuffed enough things into the big pocket of the hoodie he stole from Molly that he was beginning to look like a kangaroo. Of course with his wallet, component pouch, phone, and a weird rock that he insisted was essential, they were probably much safer than the normal couple out for a walk in the middle of the night.

What surprised Molly most was that there were still people out.

There was a quiet solidarity among them all not to acknowledge each other, just to walk in their own little spheres of whatever had dragged them out here at this godforsaken hour. Of course, this was exactly the hour that the Moonweaver loved, and this felt more like an adventurous little tryst than anything he’d had in ages.

The fact that he’d basically had an anxiety attack over a nightmare ten minutes prior only added to the strange ethereal quality of it all. He felt like he was alone in his own little bubble with Caleb Widogast and nothing and no one could penetrate it. Not his past, not Caleb’s, nothing.

It was quite nice.

The diner was mostly empty, with a tortle sitting at the counter drinking coffee before some horribly early shift, but Molly and Caleb were the only ones sitting in booths.

“Are you in the mood for anything?” Caleb asked, looking through the outrageously long menu. It was weird that they made all the different kinds of food 24/7, but Molly was grateful.

“Waffles. Jester told me if you ask, they’ll put ice cream on them.”

Caleb chuckled softly, nodding and looking over the menu. “I think I might opt for something more tame.”

“Spoil sport,” Molly teased, his tail flicking out under the small table to wrap around Caleb’s ankle.

To the man’s credit, he didn’t even jump anymore. That was probably bad, if they ever ended up anywhere with snakes again, but Molly couldn’t help but to love it. A little tether keeping them together.

“Has Caduceus been here?” Molly asked after a while, looking at the strange plants that had vines growing around the ceiling and the counters.

Caleb shrugged. “He usually doesn’t go out to eat. Sometimes he goes to tea places to get new ideas, I think, but I doubt they have anything groundbreaking here.”

Molly hummed, chewing his lip while he looked at the drink menu. “True. The plants are nice though. I feel like he’d appreciate it.”

“They do have vegan stuff, if you ask. I think their kitchen must be enchanted to hold all the stuff on this menu,” he set the unwieldy thing down, smiling and avoiding eye contact with the waitress who came to pour them some water.

She wasn’t there to make smalltalk though, just taking their orders and bringing back Molly’s soda and Caleb’s orange juice. All he wanted was to have a sugar high and then descend into a dreamless food coma before his shift tonight at the Lavish Chateau. Luckily, Caleb had brought him to the perfect place to do just that.

And Caleb was good at comfortable silences, but the longer Molly knew him, the better he was getting about talking about nothing. They managed to fill the silence with idle chatter about favorite diner foods, what they thought their friends might be up to, places they wanted to visit someday, favorite movies, favorite games, everything.

Molly was soon full of waffles and far away from nightmares.

But as he took Caleb’s hand and started the trek back to their apartment, he made a discontented sound. “I was hoping to be tired again already, but I feel wide awake.”

“We could do something else?” Caleb said, but his brow was furrowed in such a way to reveal that he really didn’t know what it would be.

Swinging their linked hands a bit more than necessary, Molly hummed, “We could… watch the sunrise? I have the code to the lock on the roof written down somewhere.”

“It’s 0513,” Caleb said. “And the sun should be rising within the hour, I think.”

“Oh, that’s not something you have memorized?” Molly teased.

He rolled his eyes and pulled his phone out of the purple hoodie pocket. “Sunrises and sunsets don’t typically concern arcanists. That’s nature magic, like Reani and other druids.”

“Well, I for one am shocked and appalled,” Molly said, far too large of a grin on his face.

But Caleb just lifted up their entwined hands and kissed the back of Molly’s before looking up when the sun would rise that day. “I was right, if that means anything. Just about an hour. Now, can you help me fix the clock on this damned thing? It’s two minutes off and it’s killing me.”

Molly laughed and spun around so Caleb would have his arm over Molly’s shoulders instead. “Give it here.”

He made Caleb wait to set it until the minute changed exactly, almost tripping on a tree root that had cracked through the cement on the way back since he was staring at Caleb's phone. But there was no reason not to try and make it perfect for Caleb.

It wasn't long before they were up on the roof, leaning against the railing and using a beach towel to cover up the cigarette butts and bird shit that had accumulated in the underused space. But they were now completely alone and still able to hear the sounds of the city slowly coming to life around them. Faintly, Molly could hear the crash of the surf, and the sky was starting to lighten over the water despite the two moons still shining bright in the sky.

Molly’s tail flicked back and forth until it found Caleb’s wrist and made its home there.

“Tell me… Tell me something you’ve never told anyone else,” Molly said, staring out as a few lights began to flick on in the small windows they could see from the roof.

Caleb hummed, shifting almost imperceptible but definitely getting closer. “Like what?”

“Anything, really. Just something you’ve never bothered to tell anyone.”

He was quiet for a long while. “I haven’t thought about leaving in months. Not really. Not for good.”

Molly’s heart leapt into his throat. “Really?”

“Ja,” Caleb murmured, now close enough to lean his head against Molly’s shoulder. “I feel… more prepared. Safer. With all of our friends. With you.”

He couldn’t stop himself from bending to kiss Caleb’s temple as tenderly as he could manage. His heart felt like it might burst out of his chest at any second. “I’m glad. We definitely all want you to stay.”

“Ja,” he said, almost too quiet to hear, then started rifling through his pockets. “In fact…”

He pulled out a small piece of paper nearly identical to the note from the Empire swamp that Molly had confronted him about all those months ago. It brought a frown to Molly’s face almost immediately until Caleb started doing something strange. He was folding the note in half again, then bending the sides of it down, turning Molly’s frown into a look of confusion.

Edge over edge, Caleb kept folding until he was holding a paper airplane.

He sat up a little straighter to send it careening off the building, doing a few little flips before he sent a firebolt after it and the note was caught up in smoke.

A few ashes were all that was left, swept away in the wind.

Before Molly could formulate any of the emotions swirling in his head into actual sentences, Caleb leaned back against his shoulder. “Now you. Tell me something you’ve never told anyone.”

_I love you so much it terrifies me._

Molly swallowed the words down before they could overwhelm him. Everything felt so much more _raw_ this early in the morning, when it felt like they were the only two people awake in the city. But not until they were safe. From Ikithon and from… whatever this thing was from his past. Or maybe just Ikithon. If Molly’s past was coming back to consume him, he might as well say it first.

But not now.

Not even with how perfect Caleb looked in this morning light, leaning against his shoulder and proclaiming that he felt, that _Molly_ made him feel, safe.

“I have no idea if I believe in tarot cards or not,” was what he finally blurted out.

Caleb cocked an eyebrow, begging more information.

“I… I usually either tell people it’s entirely true or entirely bullshit, but I’m really not sure. Usually I think it’s all crap. Reading people, not cards. Sometimes… Sometimes I think they’re onto something.” Molly grabbed a pebble off the ground beside them and started to fidget with so he had something to look at.

He nodded slowly, taking in the information like it was fascinating. “I wonder if the Moonweaver ever uses them to tell you things. That seems like something she might do.”

“I suppose you’re right,” Molly sighed, wishing he could have said something more meaningful. He should have been prepared for something like this when he’d asked Caleb that in the first place. Not that he was ever prepared for anything.

Caleb was silent for a time, then said, “Would you do a reading for me?”

“What?” Molly asked, almost dropping the pebble off the roof entirely.

He shrugged, “I’ve never had one done. If you put stock in it, I might too.”

“I… I mean I’m pretty sure it’s bullshit.”

“Maybe the gods want to tell us something today, maybe not. Does it really matter?”

Molly blinked. “I suppose not. I don’t have my cards though.”

Caleb peered over the edge of the railing. “Think our balcony is less than thirty feet away?”

“I… yes? I don’t know?” Molly said, peeking over too.

But he could already feel the crackle of arcane power as Caleb cast something beside him and sent goosebumps up and down his arms. He gently slid open the door of the balcony and grabbed the cards Molly had laid on a nearby table, making them levitate and land in Molly’s lap.

“Is that the spell Veth uses in the bakery?” Molly asked, starting to shuffle the cards in his hands.

A strange flush crept up on Caleb’s cheeks. “Ah, no. It’s the one I used to throw Beauregard in the water. It’s generally not used for such… small things, but I didn’t want to leave the roof.”

“Oh,” was all Molly could think to say.

He took a deep breath, trying to push away all the conflicting emotions of the moment and just kept shuffling. This was easy to slip into, his rehearsed spiel about the cards. Or at least it should have been. He’d never been head over heels in love with one of his clients though. And reading friends like Jester was easy.

This didn’t seem easy.

This seemed like answers he might not actually want to know.

“So, pretend it’s not all bullshit, and think about a question really hard. I’m not… I’m not going to bullshit you like I do for everyone else. I’m just going to tell you what I’ve been taught and what the cards you pull mean.”

Caleb nodded, moving so there was some space between them for Molly to put down the cards, but turning to face him instead of the sunrise.

Molly spread out the cards in a big arc on the beach towel. “Now, you’re going to pick three. One is the past, one is the present, and one is the future.”

“In Ordnung,” he mumbled, fingers hovering in the air over the cards. Molly could feel the crackle of magic through the air again as Caleb picked his three cards out carefully, never touching them but pulling them forward with the spell instead.

It’s not like pulling the three of swords for Caleb’s past was surprising, but the fact that it was accurate just made a little knot form in Molly's stomach after his strange seemingly prophetic dream. “So this one is usually grief, heartbreak, that kind of thing. Some kind of trauma.”

Caleb made a small sound of acknowledgement, a smile with no warmth in it across his face.

The three of cups made sense too, and it just made Molly more uneasy about the last card. “This one is all about friendship, loving communities bringing you happiness.”

A little bit of warmth worked its way back into Caleb’s smile. The sky was growing brighter around them, and Molly was suddenly very unwilling to flip over the last card. He didn’t want to know their future like he wanted nothing to do with his past. There was a reason he did this, and it wasn’t because he thought he was a prophet or an instrument of the gods.

It was because he was good at bullshit.

He didn’t know how to deal with that little smile on Caleb’s face, eyes crinkled in genuine happiness as they sat to watch the sunrise.

The last card felt like a suckerpunch. It wasn’t the tower, no, that he probably could have written off as bullshit. “The five of cups. This one…”

“Looks like another sad one,” Caleb said softly, looking at the woman staring at the spilled and empty cups.

He nodded, willing the words to come out though each one stung. “Another one about grief. Loss, self pity sometimes. Painful changes.”

Molly scooped up the cards like he could get rid of their meanings if they were safely tucked in his pocket. Scooching closer, Caleb covered his hand with his own and turned back to the sunrise. The first rays of golden orange light were peeking over the horizon, turning the Lucidian Ocean into a shining, bejeweled quilt no artist could ever hope to replicate.

Caleb squeezed his hand softly, looking out across the sea. “All things considered, and no offense meant to you, but I think it’s all bullshit. I’ve never believed in fate. It’s all random chance and self-fulfilling prophecy.”

Turning to look at him, Molly felt his breath catch in his throat as the first rays of sun spread across Caleb’s face and illuminated every freckle and strand of hair in fiery golds. He was devastatingly beautiful, and his eyes twinkled just like the sea. He looked… content. Content to spend his morning taking care of Molly after a nightmare. Content to just sit there and be.

All Molly could say without worrying about his voice cracking was, “Yeah. Bullshit.” 

_I hope so._


	77. Somnovem

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Caleb goes to about every library in Exandria before realizing he has access to something, dare I say, better than a library.

### Chapter 77: Somnovem

Nothing.

There was nothing about strange cities and red eyes and “Nonagon” anywhere. Caleb was driving himself insane teleporting to and scouring every library he could think of over the next few months. 

There was the Cobalt Reserve in Port Damali, a weird one in Vasselheim, the one in Zadash, and even the one in Rexxentrum with supervision or permission from Beau. Nothing anywhere. Normally he could find a loose thread somewhere and begin to unravel a magical mystery like this, but this was ridiculous. It didn’t help that the folks at the Cobalt Soul didn’t have anything catalogued digitally and had no real system for inter-library loans since the books weren’t allowed to leave the premises.

Beau was doing her best to help, but now she was working on two different assignments, and balancing shifts as a bouncer at the Lavish Chateau. Caleb tried to tell her he thought this was more important, more pressing than taking down Ikithon, but the Cobalt Soul didn’t see it the same way. And he could tell, though she said nothing, that she agreed. When they found nothing, she turned back to problems she thought they could fix.

He was on his own for the most part.

He knew _nothing._

He had no leads, and he couldn’t find a lick of information about any of it.

The best he could tell it was some truly ancient magic, but that only intrigued him more. The fact that Molly had two more nightmares like that while he was searching and coming up dry only made things worse. He did remember some other things each time he woke up, and Caleb did well taking down notes and compartmentalizing his abject terror at the thought of what consequences this might hold.

Somnovem was one of the words. The nine eyes. And it wanted Molly to go north. Somewhere cold and snowy and dangerous.

It kept calling him “Lucien.”

Molly was hiding it, but Caleb could tell he was just as terrified of the dreams. One of them he might have been able to pass off as a fluke, but these… these were too distinct. Too worrisome. Nothing he could have imagined about his past was quite like this. He’d always figured he was just some kind of asshole who pissed off the wrong people, but this was otherworldly and awful.

Caleb wanted nothing more than to be able to soothe all his worries and make his past recede back into the shadows, but nothing seemed to work. He could soothe the symptoms but there was no way to face the source.

After the third nightmare, Caleb stopped going just to Beau and started going to Caduceus. Molly didn’t want to worry people, but Caleb needed to know he was doing everything he could to help. The firbolg almost dropped the teacup he was holding when Caleb began to explain, only saved by Caleb reflexively pulling out his feather and slowing its descent. He was grateful for having modified the spell for objects. It was much more useful around the home, where people didn’t tend to fall from great heights.

He wasn’t grateful for the knowing look on Caduceus’s face.

“Thanks, Caleb. That’s one of my favorites,” he said softly, rescuing the teacup that now laid gently on the floor. There was some spilled tea, but nothing disastrous. “I’ll… I’ll put the kettle back on. Something soothing, I think.”

“Ja,” Caleb said, starting to realize this might not be a quick affair and sitting at the counter island that separated Caduceus’s kitchen from the living room after helping to wipe up the tea. Something to calm his nerves might be nice.

Caduceus flitted about the kitchen with less calm to his usual demeanor than Caleb had seen since they found his entire family petrified in Southern Xhorhas. He wanted to offer some sort of comfort, but boiling beneath the surface of his skin were similar worries. So slowly, he told the story of the nightmares, how the eyes would glow, and the things Molly remembered.

Nodding at each new addition to the tale, Caduceus continued the slow methodical process of preparing the tea. He danced around the kitchen like a perfectly timed waltz, filling the time between when the kettle got back to boiling with pulling out a few different types of tea from the cabinet and setting them up on the counter. While the tea steeped he went to the fridge and grabbed milk, then sugar, and honey.

Caleb usually just drank his straight, unless Caduceus recommended otherwise. Today he seemed to be, wordlessly, as he pushed the milk and honey closer.

As he sat back with the mug in his hands, Caleb listened carefully to Caduceus’s half of the story.

“During a session of meditation and communion with the Wildmother a few weeks ago, she showed me a city. It sounds like the one plaguing Molly’s dreams.”

A shiver worked its way down Caleb’s spine, and he was immediately grateful for the warm mug of tea in his grasp. The milk had cooled it down enough to drink, and the honey soothed his frayed nerves a degree.

Caduceus went on, describing how he saw a vision of this city while meditating. “It seemed to be adrift in the Astral Sea, though I couldn’t see in perfect detail. There were flashes of something in shadow, very large, ominous, monolithic. A city that moves under its own power. Hunting. Moving with will. Following. Hungry and chasing. I saw the streets of the city, paved roads, buildings and towers. And they flickered and twisted, organically, shifting like they were alive. The roads pulsed.” 

He took a deep breath and a small sip of his own tea. His had honey and a little squeeze of lemon. “It was all weirdly familiar, but so alien. Thousands of minds within _were_ the city. It didn’t make sense then, and it doesn’t exactly make sense to me now. But it was hungry, seeking. The words that sort of came with it, like in Mr. Mollymauk’s dreams were ‘Within the minds of Eyes of Nine, the vessel, the city draws close.’”

The vessel.

If Molly’s dreams had been clear about anything it was that _he_ was the vessel.

A knot coiled in Caleb’s stomach that no tea could help to fix.

“I believe… I believe this city is a perversion of everything the Wildmother holds sacred. Of everything I hold dear. If there is anything I can ever do to help you, do not hesitate to ask me. I would do just about anything to protect the world from… from that.”

Caleb nodded, the movement feeling more robotic than he really intended.

Putting a warm hand on his shoulder, Caduceus gave it a squeeze and offered a small smile. “I am glad that I’m not alone in this task from the Wildmother. And I am very glad that Mollymauk has you working on this as well. If there’s anyone who can figure out the history of this thing or how to deal with it, it’s you.”

“I’m afraid I’m not doing very well in that department,” Caleb mumbled, staring into his teacup. “But I suppose you’re right about not being alone. Beauregard knows as well, since I needed her help to access the libraries.”

Caduceus nodded and asked Caleb to go over the specifics of Molly’s dream again. Caleb agreed and waited for the Firbolg to grab a notebook to write a few notes on the similarities between the visions. It was another couple of hours before they felt like they’d told each other everything and Caleb decided he really needed to go home. If he stayed any longer, Caduceus would probably insist on keeping him for dinner, and he didn’t want to leave Mollymauk alone at their apartment.

So Caleb packed up his own notes and said his goodbyes to Caduceus.

He pushed the tea across the table. “I made these with Pumat. We made them for some of his patients with night terrors, to help keep dreams at bay, but if the city is communicating through dreams… I think this will be a good idea. For now.”

“Ja,” Caleb said, pulling the tins closer. “Danke. I… I think this should help. Maybe not a permanent solution, like you said. But better than nothing.”

He leaned forward. “And how are _you_ doing with all this?”

Caleb swallowed, fumbling with the last of his notes. “I… I am alright. I always thought that it would be my past that messed everything up. I suppose nothing is that simple.”

“Is anything messed up?” Caduceus asked, cocking his head.

He took a deep breath, then shook his head. “No, I suppose not. It’s not as if neither of us has ever had a nightmare before. I just wish I could do more.”

Caduceus patted his shoulder gently. “I think you’re doing plenty, Caleb. I’ll continue to meditate on it and ask the Wildmother for more guidance. I might ask Fjord to do the same, with your and Molly’s consent.”

“I’ll… I’ll talk with Molly. I didn’t tell him I was coming here. He doesn’t want people to worry, but I’m already worried.”

“It’s definitely worthy of concern. But you will need to tell him.”

He nodded, grabbing the canisters of tea. “I will. And I’ll ask about Fjord. I’m grateful I stopped by. You were more helpful than months spent in a library.”

“I never thought I’d hear you say that, Mr. Caleb,” Caduceus said with his normal pleased grin and a happy flick of his ears. It was so genuine Caleb felt a smile of his own tug at his cheeks.

“Well, believe it, my friend. I’ll let you know if I hear anything.”

The curl of anxious dread that had found its way into Caleb’s core had not lessened, and sat like a stone as he took the subway back uptown. He wished he had Veth to watch his back as he pulled out his phone to text, but he didn’t really have that much to steal other than spell components. Just in case, he snapped his fingers and summoned Frumpkin too, setting him around his shoulders to watch behind him. The little cat might have been oblivious at times, but he could at least tell when someone was walking towards Caleb enough that he should look up.

> **Caleb:** Hallo.  
>  **Caleb:** Are you at the apartment?  
>  **Caleb:** I have something I need to tell you
> 
> **Molly:** Yeah, I’m here  
>  **Molly:** Is everything ok?  
>  **Molly:** Are yoi ok?  
>  **Molly:** *you
> 
> **Caleb:** I’m fine.  
>  **Caleb:** I just have news I shouldn’t put off sharing.  
> 

He typed out “Don’t worry.” but found his finger hovering over the send button. Caleb was worried. Molly was already worried. Telling him not to would accomplish nothing.

Like Caduceus said, it was definitely worthy of concern. And Molly was already typing a response.

> **Molly:** Ok  
>  **Molly:** Good  
>  **Molly:** Well, I’ll be here
> 
> **Caleb:** Maybe you should order some takeout?  
>  **Caleb:** I’m not really in the mood to cook anything unless you are, but a movie night with pizza or something sounds nice.
> 
> **Molly:** Pizza sounds perfect  
> 

Caleb smiled at the questioning picture of a cheese emoji and sent his assent for pizza toppings before slipping his phone back into his pocket and gathering Frumpkin into his arms. He did his job well, purring up a storm all the way home. When they did get back into the apartment he slunk off to inspect his dinner bowl and then hop into the cat tree Molly had gotten him for Caleb’s birthday.

Seeking a different creature with a tail to cuddle, one that probably needed it more, Caleb called a hello into the empty living room and received an answer from their workroom. Molly was putting away some embroidery project as Caleb walked in.

“Pizza should be here in ten minutes. Do you wanna talk now or over food?” Molly called over his shoulder, making sure nothing got tangled in the drawers as he cleaned up.

Caleb walked up behind him and wrapped his arms around the tiefling’s chest, burying his face in the crook of his neck and trying to ignore the red eye tattoo peeking out at him. They’d never bothered him before, but the fact that they were tormenting Molly made his stomach turn.

Molly turned carefully, a smile pulling at his cheeks as he did his best to kiss Caleb’s temple without knocking his horn into him. “Well hello to you too. Miss me?”

“A bit,” he mumbled, allowing Molly to turn so he could hug him back properly. “It has been… a long day, I suppose.”

“Should I be worried?”

Caleb pulled back with a smile that was too sad for his liking. “No more than before.”

“C’mon, let’s go sit down somewhere. You look a bit exhausted, dear,” Molly said, pulling back to just hold Caleb’s hand after a quick peck.

He nodded and took the hand, leading them back out to the living room. “Caduceus didn’t give me any caffeine.”

“So that’s where you’ve been all day?” Molly asked, brow furrowed. “Did something happen over there?”

“We just talked. And I am sorry, Mollymauk, I should have asked you first. But I thought perhaps he could offer some help or at least guidance about your… about the night terrors,” Caleb said, words all spilling out in a rush. “And he did. And we talked for hours. He has seen the city too. The Wildmother has shown it to him.”

Molly had stopped in the middle of the hallway, tensing at the onslaught of information. “Oh. I mean, I wish you told me. But I probably would have insisted on going and that sounds… well, as exhausting a day as you made it sound.”

Caleb nodded, the rest of the words faltering in his throat for a moment before he was able to continue. “I know… I know you’re already worried, and you didn’t want to bother anyone. But I didn’t want to worry you more. In the end I didn’t really learn much that was new, besides confirming a few things. I did get some tea that should keep the dreams away, so that’s something. But I’m still sorry.”

“I understand, Caleb,” Molly reassured him and moved to kiss his forehead. “I know you’re just doing it because you care.”

He swallowed, trying to think of what he could possibly say to truly capture the pure terror he felt at the thought of something ruining everything they had together. Of something taking Mollymauk away. Of course he cared.

“And now you can’t be guilty about dragging me into your past stuff. Turns out I was just as bad all along,” Molly said with too brittle of a smile.

The ridiculousness of the thought brought Caleb out of the tense moment and he almost snorted, smothering his laughter with one hand. “Gods, we’re quite the pair, aren’t we?”

“Two walking disasters, dear,” Molly said, laughing alongside him. “Now let’s pile all the blankets and pillows in the place on the couch bed and make a fort to eat pizza in.”

Caleb pulled him in for a quick hug first, just to confirm that they were still okay. That he was still there. Molly cupped his cheek and kissed him gently, rubbing away an escaped tear and leading him to grab the pillows of their bed. Time for that later.


	78. One Year

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Molly has special plans, but Caleb has had a long ass day

### Chapter 78: One Year

Things had settled into a bit of a routine. It was unusual for Molly’s life to seem so stagnant, and pleasantly so at that. With Caduceus’s weird enchanted tea, the nightmares had stopped, and that had stopped any new information from fueling Caleb’s research fire. Without fail he did disappear once a week to go research something, somewhere in Exandria. But he always came home, and usually without any new information.

They would eat dinner together, talk about their days, cuddle on the couch or in the bed, fool around, and it was as wonderful as anything Molly could have ever imagined. He never knew exactly what a relationship like this would be like, but if he’d known he might have been looking harder for it. Living with Caleb was wonderful and soft and domestic, even when they had to soothe each other’s worries or nightmares. Molly never wanted it to stop.

Today it seemed Caleb was a bit upset, mumbling about the time limits on his disguise spell and the monks at the Cobalt Soul all watching him like a hawk.

“You okay? You look far too grumpy,” Molly said, almost finished making dinner, some weird rice thing Caduceus had shown him how to make a while back.

Caleb sighed and dropped his papers and research unceremoniously on a side table. “I think the information I’m looking for is in the Cobalt Reserve in Rexxentrum, but they all about kicked me out today. I like to be disguised that close to… you know. But the monks are definitely not happy with me showing up in disguise, even with Beauregard specifically telling them it’s fine.”

Molly hummed, putting down the stack of plates and silverware on the table before directing Caleb to sit and taking advantage to rub his shoulders a second before going back to the stove.

“And I only have so many spells, so having to stagger bathroom trips so they’re not exactly an hour apart is such a waste. It’s just frustrating. And I need to be able to teleport home, and prepare for anyone recognizing me there. I feel like I’m pushing my luck showing up there every week too. It’s… a lot.” He sighed softly, but reached over to where Molly had piled plates and silverware to set the table.

Molly wanted to kiss the frown off his face, but their dinner would get cold. So instead he just moved to serve them both straight from the pot and scooched his chair closer. “I don’t want you breaking your back over this, okay? Caduceus’s tea is working, and knowing what this all is might not actually fix anything.”

“It is better to know what we’re dealing with. Knowledge is never the enemy,” Caleb said, but his voice was quiet.

“I’m not saying it is, but I am saying you can take a break. Turn it all off, at least for a night. Especially tonight.” Molly desperately wanted to help Caleb relax. Help him find some peace after being in the city that had caused him so much pain. It helped that there weren’t many ties between the Cerberus Assembly and the Cobalt Soul, but being a few minutes away from the place he was tortured wasn’t great.

Caleb raised a brow, questioning but unsure as to what Molly was referring to. He was quiet tonight, and Molly would patiently coax him out of his shell. It was a special night after all. Even if Caleb had spent half of it stuck in a library.

Molly grinned, “Guess what day it is.”

Caleb recited the day for him with perfect accuracy, frowning at the implication that he couldn’t.

“Wrong!”

He only frowned more, completely confused.

“Well, not _wrong_ wrong, but not what I was talking about. It’s officially been one year since the first time I taught you Infernal!” Molly said, tail flicking back and forth in excitement. He wasn’t great with dates, but he’d set reminders in his phone for this one since the lines kind of blurred as to when he and Caleb actually started dating.

Caleb blinked, gears turning in his head as he seemed to realize that Molly was completely correct. “I suppose it was.”

“And I know those weren’t really dates, but they kind of were, so happy sort of anniversary,” Molly said, grinning before kissing him on the cheek. He couldn’t help himself, though he was already trying not to buzz from excitement of what he was hiding.

“I suppose so. Gods, we moved quite fast, didn’t we?” Caleb said, sounding a bit sheepish.

But Molly only grinned wider. “Are you kidding me? I’ve known you like a fifth of my life! Anyways, I got you something. Well, it’s for both of us, but, yeah.” He slipped the little box out from where he’d hidden it on the other chair that they never used.

“Should we eat first?” Caleb asked, looking at their dinner.

Molly faltered a moment. But just a moment. “Nope. I’m too impatient. If it gets too cold we can throw it in the microwave.”

Caleb chuckled and nodded, pulling the ribbon off the small box. It had taken Molly forever to find the right sized box for the tickets, so he’d finally just asked Jester to make him one. It was green and covered in glitter, and somehow she’d gotten a bow that looked like an actual peacock. It wasn’t exactly Caleb’s style, but Caleb liked him enough, so it was probably fine. Hopefully. Molly was nervous about the whole thing, especially since Caleb had gotten very overwhelmed with the gifts on his birthday. This time it was something they could both enjoy, like Caleb taking him to the circus or the renaissance faire. Judging by the soft smile on his face as he carefully set aside the peacock, Molly had guessed correctly this time.

His eyes widened as he carefully translated the Infernal printed on the tickets and began to figure out exactly what they were. “Molly, these-”

Nervously shifting in his seat, Molly started to ramble, “Now, the reason it’s all the way in Port Damali is because the venue is nice and small. Yasha and I went there once last year, and there’s a place where you can see the band upstairs but it’s not too crowded. But we can also switch the tickets to somewhere closer, I made sure I could when I bought them. But you love their CDs so much and I’ve heard they’re really lovely live-”

“This is wonderful, Molly,” Caleb interrupted him, cupping his cheek and planting a quick kiss to help staunch the flow of words escaping Molly’s mouth. “The small venue sounds perfect.”

Molly could feel his shoulders sag in relief. “I’m glad you like them. There’s something else underneath there too.”

“There’s more? Molly, you really didn’t have to go to all the trouble-”

“It’s all a combined thing, so I get to enjoy it too. Unless you want to abandon me and take Jester, which will break my poor fragile little heart, but I’ll understand-”

Caleb shut him up with another quick kiss and a roll of his eyes. “Ah, earplugs. These should be very helpful, ja. And what’s this?”

“That’s a reservation for a really cute AirBnB in Port Damali so we have a place to hang out in near the concert hall and a place to crash late at night if you want to drink and use all your spells sending strobe lights into the air at the concert.”

Eyes scanning over the reservation sheet, Caleb began nodding slowly. 

Molly went on, describing the place he’d found and pulling up a few pictures on his phone. Port Damali was more spread out than Nicodranas, and the AirBnB he’d snagged was a little house, a close walk to the beach, and all the reviews said it was clean and quiet. He thought it was perfect. He said, “So that way we can hang out nearby without worrying about being late, but we don’t have to go somewhere crowded and public since you’ll get more than enough of that at the concert. And we can just pop back over there, get some fun takeout and relax. I made sure to find one that wasn’t in too busy a place, and it’s cat friendly so we can bring Frumpkin. Look, this one has a hot tub!”

Caleb’s cheeks flushed gently, and Molly wondered if he was remembering the hot springs back in the Empire. “That sounds nice. Relaxing after being in a crowd, for sure.”

“That was the idea,” Molly beamed, happy to have thought of it. Well, he’d really thought of it when he went with Yasha. They’d gone to a concert that she’d adored with some metal band that also included a harpist, but as soon as they left back to the train station she got very overstimulated and overwhelmed. They ended up renting a cheap motel room next to the train station, which was a novel experience but not one that Molly really wanted to share with Caleb.

He smiled at Molly, a soft, genuine smile that made him melt inside. “You’re far too kind to me.”

“Nah, you deserve it,” Molly grinned, moving forward to kiss Caleb’s nose.

A light flush stayed on his cheeks, but he didn’t immediately deny it. Progress. Caleb just said, “Let’s eat before it gets stone cold.”

The rice thing Caduceus had shown him was pretty good, and Caleb went back for seconds which always made Molly happy. He never thought he would be any good at cooking, but even though he knew Caleb wasn’t picky it still made him relatively proud of himself to do well. Or at least passably.

He’d make a cute little housewife, he thought. Maybe he could get one of those silly pinup style vintage dresses Jester was always wearing. And an apron.

Or just an apron.

Their food would definitely go cold.

Molly was drawn out of his thoughts by noticing how Caleb winced at something falling over in the apartment above them, still on edge after being in Rexxentrum all day.

He did his best, taking Caleb up to the roof to watch the sunset together, and eventually curling up on the couch covered in fuzzy blankets and too many pillows. But Caleb was still a little twitchy, even after he’d downed a cup of cocoa with mini marshmallows.

“Is there anything I can do to help?” Molly asked quietly, trying not to disturb Caleb as he ran his fingers through ginger locks. The Great Marquesian Baking Show’s new season was playing in the background and Frumpkin had set up residence directly on Caleb’s chest, purring like he only did when he was being hand fed treats or Caleb was really stressed.

Caleb closed his eyes and leaned into Molly’s touch a hair more. “This is nice. It just… takes a while for my brain to stop worrying about being in Rexxentrum. Especially since this was the third week in a row.”

“Yeah, that makes sense,” Molly murmured, “I’m sorry, dear.”

“It’s alright. It’ll pass.” Caleb turned to look up at him instead of at the television. “I just wish I could turn my brain off for a minute.”

“Alcohol? Drugs?” Molly asked. He still knew a few people that would probably be willing to deal to him. It wasn’t that late at night yet either. The sun was starting to set earlier and earlier these days.

Caleb snorted, shaking his head in Molly’s lap. “I have to work an early shift tomorrow at the bookstore.”

“Gross,” Molly said, wishing he could do more but craning his neck a moment to bend down and kiss Caleb’s temple.

The strange position reminded him of a time when they’d been reversed. The first night Caleb had asked to kiss him, way back when they’d figured out how to do the special spell for Veth. The night Molly had gotten dared into a big purple cat.

Caleb said, “Gross indeed. But I’ll live.”

“No, wait, I have an idea. I know it’s not long term, but it might roll over.”

“What?” Caleb asked, a furrow appearing on his face. Molly wanted to kiss it away and keep going with every freckle.

Focus. “Remember when you turned me into a cat?”

“You were more like a purple jaguar, but yes, I remember. Why?”

“Can you cast that on yourself?” he asked, starting to get excited at the idea. 

“Yes? Why would I do that?” Caleb said, nuzzling a bit more. Molly realized he’d stopped carding his finger’s through Caleb’s hair in his excitement and started again with a smile.

Molly said, “Well, I was a little tipsy then, but as a cat I wasn’t worried about anything. Back then I was terrified about pushing your boundaries or overwhelming you, but as a cat I had no worries about getting in your lap and letting you snuggle me. You should make yourself into something that can’t worry.”

“Cats can worry too,” Caleb mumbled, running a hand through Frumpkin’s fur.

“Oh, you know what I mean. If you were a cat you’d be more focused on how comfy my lap is, and how lovely Frumpkin’s purring is.”

Caleb nodded slowly and went fishing for something under the piles of blankets. Soon he was holding a familiar little cocoon and casting the spell still lying down and with Frumpkin on his chest.

With a crackle of energy, there was no longer a red haired man in Molly’s lap but a devastatingly cute red and orange kitten with bright blue eyes. Frumpkin eyed his master warily, but Molly immediately scooped him up.

“Oh my gosh, you’re the cutest fucking thing I’ve ever seen. And that’s saying something. You’re usually pretty damn cute,” Molly cooed, unable to keep the huge grin off his face. 

Caleb cat, Catleb, blinked at him with those huge blue eyes then let out a tiny little “mew,” before nuzzling closer to Molly’s hand.

“Right, right. This was for calming snuggling purposes. But you’re doing this again sometime so I can take pictures, okay?”

The little kitten mewed again as Molly repositioned himself so that Catleb could curl up on his chest as he laid down. Frumpkin curled around the kitten and started purring. That started a chain reaction and Molly felt like he’d laid face down in a massage chair. It wasn’t long before those pretty blue eyes fluttered shut and his wizard was fast asleep on his chest.


	79. There's Always Calm Before a Storm

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> tags have been updated, and we have returned to chaos <3

### Chapter 79: There’s Always Calm Before a Storm

Mollymauk was a genius and everything was better as a cat. As soon as Caleb’s human form melted away, so did his worries.

The whole world was reduced to just Molly cooing at how cute he was, and then Frumpkin, wonderful, lovely Frumpkin curling around him as Molly rubbed his ears. Tension bled away from his body as he snuggled into the soft fabric of Molly’s shirt. He was purring before he could even wonder how to do it, and he was asleep faster than he ever thought possible. It was bliss.

He felt a little bad when he turned back, sprawled across Molly like a weighted blanket.

Molly’s eyes blinked open and a smile formed on his face, alleviating any guilt left in Caleb. “Hi there, sleepy kitty.”

“Did you know that you’re a genius?” Caleb asked, shifting so that Frumpkin had more space on Molly’s chest and he was more to the side. Just so he didn’t crush him.

Molly laughed, kissing the top of his head and throwing an arm around his shoulders. “I still think you outclass me on that, but I’m not complaining about the compliment.”

Caleb smothered a yawn by nuzzling closer, mind finally at peace. “Should we go to bed? It looked like you were taking a cat nap too.”

He shrugged, bringing Caleb’s head up a fraction for a moment. “I’m very comfortable. We can at least attempt to watch the new episode again. I don’t remember when I fell asleep.”

Grabbing the tv remote meant somehow curling even closer to Molly, practically using his chest as a pillow, but Caleb was more than content to do so, flicking back the baking show to the last thing he remembered before turning into a cat. He wasn’t quite as exhausted and drained anymore, just settling in to listen to the rise and fall of Molly’s chest under his ear, the gentle heartbeat he could hear with his closeness.

There was something serene in their closeness, the quiet intimacy of it all.

That made what broke into their little bubble all the more jarring.

Caleb shot upright on the couch, heart pounding.

Molly stirred, eyes blinking open from where he’d dozed off again. “Caleb? What’s wrong?”

“The protective wards downstairs just got dispelled,” he whispered, trying to think of something he could do. He felt frozen, Frumpkin meowing sadly at him as the cat was jostled by his sudden movement.

This couldn’t be happening. 

It had to be something else. Someone probably just got some paint to clean up the sigils. They were disguised as graffiti after all. Nothing to worry about, not really. He could grab some spray paint tomorrow afternoon in a more subtle color and put them back.

He heard footsteps.

Molly sat up more. “I’ll get my sword.”

Caleb was shaking, watching Molly get the scimitar from its resting place by the coatrack and unsheathing it. “You… You can’t, I-”

This _couldn’t_ be happening. He was supposed to be _safe_ in their apartment. _Molly_ was supposed to be safe, not walking farther away than the range of Caleb’s teleport spell to get his scimitar. Caleb was shaking like a leaf as he felt the wards inside the apartment get dispelled. That meant whoever it was (Who was he kidding? He knew who was coming.), was less than 120 feet away. He needed to get up, to do something, to get them to safety.

“Like hell, Caleb. We can defend ourselves, yeah?” Molly said, frowning at him as Frumpkin’s hackles began to raise.

Panic clenched in his chest as he quickly told the cat to run away into the bedroom, hide in the closet, and stay there until he was summoned. He couldn’t lose Frumpkin again, but he might need him in this plane. He needed to keep as many viable options available as possible. Molly was too far away from him, and he was frozen in place. Fear was shutting down all rational thought and he could feel his hand shaking as he grabbed his component pouch.

“Mollymauk, I-I don’t have many of my spells left today, we cannot-”

He _knew_ he shouldn’t have been going to Rexxentrum so much these past few weeks. Not when the work to take down Ikithon had gone dry, when the Cobalt Soul had returned to them with their hands tied since they had so little physical evidence other than Caleb’s word. Caleb had been pushing his luck, and it had started to all run out, slipping through his fingers like sand. It was a lost cause to hold onto more than a few grains. And now he had just wasted a spell to turn into a cat. He barely had anything left.

The footsteps stopped right outside their locked apartment door. The arcane lock was the last small barrier and it wouldn’t be any match for whoever this was. He knew who it would be, and he wasn’t ready. Caleb’s heart leapt into his throat and refused to allow him breaths in anything more than short gasps.

There was a crackle of arcane energy and Archmage Trent Ikithon was standing in their living room.

“There you are, Bren.”

The voice sent a cold stab of terror running through his body. Dread and anger filled his chest and he didn’t know what to do. The man was standing in between him and Molly. He wouldn’t be able to run past without Ikithon getting the chance to cast something on him. Caleb knew how powerful his old master was, and it would only take one lucky shot to kill him. Molly wouldn’t take that lying down, and he would end up dead himself, with no one planning to resurrect him. Ikithon probably wouldn’t leave any witnesses, not if he was planning to take or kill Caleb.

Of course he was powerful and arrogant enough to assume no one would suspect him of such a thing. It was how he got away with so much.

Mollymauk wasn’t in range for teleportation. Mollymauk was winding back to attack Ikithon.

Caleb _panicked._ He could feel bile churning in his gut as his worst nightmare started playing out before his eyes. He couldn’t let Molly get himself killed.

He couldn’t have another loved one’s death on his hands.

He couldn’t hear those screams too.

He couldn’t find anything useful in his component pouch. Not something that would save both himself and Mollymauk. The telekinesis spell was out of his lips before he could stop himself. Molly tensed, looking at him with horror as Caleb raised him above the ground. He managed to cover his mouth too, knowing he would break if he could hear him yelling. The yelling of loved ones always broke him like a twig. He took a deep breath. If anyone was getting hurt here, it was him. He would take everything he had learned, and he would keep Mollymauk safe. Ikithon looked at him calculatingly, stalking forward.

“At least you kept your brain all these years. It would be a shame if I came here to fetch a blithering idiot.”

He swallowed. “Why… Why are you here?” His voice shook and he winced at the display of weakness. He needed to steady himself. Caleb needed to hold his concentration on the spell, to stay strong to keep everyone safe. 

Ikithon moved closer, gripping his jaw to force Caleb to look up at him. His fingertips seared into his flesh, a painful memory of everything past as Caleb tried to focus on his breaths, the grip on his telekinesis spell, anything that might save them. He would have a moment to talk while Ikithon explained himself. The man always did like to talk.

“Every hour you spent in the Sanatorium you were roiling with fury. I knew as soon as you got out of there you would be a force to be reckoned with. Capable to do what was necessary. And then you were _gone._ You left and you ignored my teachings, ran to hide under that bleeding heart elf’s cloak, and now I'm back to show you the only way for you to really learn is through pain.” Ikithon turned to Mollymauk, still frozen by Caleb’s spell, though it wouldn’t last forever. He would recast it if necessary, but he needed to get Ikithon _out_ of there. Caleb didn’t want Ikithon looking at him, Caleb didn’t want Ikithon anywhere _near_ Molly.

“So I’ll give you a choice. Don’t say I’ve never been kind to you, Bren. You can kill him, burn him alive where he stands, and stay. Prove to me you’ve grown from your experiences, not just hidden yourself away like a sniveling coward. Or you can come with me.”

Caleb looked at Molly, feeling the terror and anxiety churn in his gut. He could always teleport himself away now, but that would leave Molly alone with Ikithon. His brain tunneled on the two choices Ikithon gave him in blind panic. There was no real choice. His head fell. Any fight he had left in him drained away to nothing.

Ikithon scoffed. “Just as weak as the day you snapped. Unable to kill this pitiful creature for your freedom. Like you killed countless others. Like you killed your own mother and father. Like you tried to kill Astrid and Eadwulf for pitying you enough to drag you to the Sanatorium.”

He threw a piece of chalk. “If you haven’t grown at all, I don't want to stay in this gaudy hovel another minute. Take us to Rexxentrum, immediately. You need to return to your studies.”

The years of learning that showing emotion wasn’t weak, that tears could be healing, burned away to ash. The impassive mask fell easily over his face. 

“Yes, sir.” 

He turned away to draw the circle on the wooden floors of their apartment. The home he’d built together with Mollymauk. He couldn’t raise his eyes to look at the tiefling as he bent to begin the spell.

Quickly, he coughed, fumbling in his pockets for a moment and sending his holster filled with his spellbook and journal into his office at the bookstore. Hopefully. He knew the store well enough. And if Calianna or Fjord found them, they’d keep them safe. Keep them away from dangerous hands, maybe give them to Veth or Yussa. Thank goodness the spell was instantaneous. He couldn’t break focus on holding Molly back, not even as he started the chalk circle.

Going through the motions of drawing the circle was meditative. It gave him a much needed moment to think through the situation. He considered drawing a circle to some other place, but Caleb had used his only teleportation spell to send his spellbook somewhere safe and he was in no position to fight. Even if he could take them to the Cobalt Soul, Ikithon would probably be able to spin it as an attack on the archmage, not an abduction. Ikithon would likely see that the symbols were wrong to begin with.

No, he had to do what he said. For Mollymauk’s sake.

This was for the best. He didn’t deserve all the wonderful friendships he’d made here in Nicodranas, didn’t deserve Yasha, Jester, Nott, Beau, Caduceus or Fjord. Even Calianna, Reani, and Pumat. Gods know he never deserved what Mollymauk had given him. Ikithon didn’t know anything about his new life, his new spells. His new family. For all he knew, Molly was just a roommate. He didn’t know how Caleb had gotten stronger. He had no idea that Caleb could teleport them straight to Ikithon’s tower without a second thought. This was good.

He couldn’t make up for what he had done, much as he tried. He couldn’t bring back his parents.

But this new family, he could save them.

That was almost enough.

It would have to be enough, since it was over.

Trent stood beside him as the incantation was almost finished. Caleb was doubly glad for learning the words he spoke in Infernal then, though he had imagined wildly different circumstances.

_“Goodbye, Mollymauk. I love you.”_


	80. The Storm

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Caleb is gone. Molly does what he can.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Last chapter got the most comments out of any lol; I had no idea so many people were reading this every day! I love every one, they're my free serotonin during my quarantine lol.

### Chapter 80: The Storm

_“Goodbye, Mollymauk. I love you.”_

The words rang out in Infernal and then their living room was empty.

Caleb loved him.

The chalk circle glowed, stealing Caleb away with the man that Molly had imagined murdering too many times, and the spell locking up his joints had ended. Before he left, Caleb had carefully placed Molly back on the floor, not wanting him to fall.

A last delicate touch from the arcane energy that should have meant nothing but safety for them both. Not sacrifice. Not like this.

Caleb said he loved Molly, and he was _gone._ Gone before Molly could say it back, gone before he could do _anything._

He could move again, but there was nothing to be done, really. Molly scrambled to the spot on the floor where his wizard had stood seconds earlier, trying not to let the tears come. If he broke down now, he would be useless, and that was _not_ an option.

But Molly already felt useless. If Molly had been taken, Caleb would have found a way to teleport to his side and have some sort of battle plan in place already. Molly could do nothing of the sort. All he knew was that they were back in Rexxentrum. He didn’t even know for sure where Caleb would be taken.

The only thing he could think of was to call someone. He looked through his contacts, trying to get his brain to do something besides slip into panic. He didn’t know if he could get a plane to Rexxentrum, and he really didn’t know if he could just walk into whatever Soltryce Academy tower Caleb had probably been taken to and just ask for the torturous asshole who ran the joint.

It would be better to get Reani’s help. It would be better to get their friends involved, though every second Caleb was with that man made his skin crawl.

Molly had been working on things, quietly, once he had figured out what crystals Caleb had been tortured with. He knew the people in Whitestone were good people, if a little shady at times. Not shady like this. With them behind the cause, and the testimonies Caleb had given at the Cobalt Soul, they had to act. The Cobalt Soul had come back to them with their hands tied, saying they didn’t have enough evidence to move forward with the case. Everyone they talked to denied what Ikithon had done, or looked too terrified to say anything at all. But Molly had still been pressuring them, keeping up with the case, even though he hadn’t told any of it to Caleb.

He would call them. They had enough proof now. They had a missing person. They had a stolen wizard and a witness. That had to be enough. He would call Beau and the Cobalt Soul and everyone in Whitestone, and if he had any other important numbers he would call them too. 

But first, he needed to call Jester.

“Hey Molly! Is Caleb there? He must have teleported his spellbook and journal into the safe in the café, it just showed up there while we were counting money and locking up for the night, and Veth is freaking out because he never goes anywhere withou-”

“Jester, fucking- hold on, just let me talk- Ikithon fucking took Caleb.” He channeled every emotion running through his mind into anger so he could function. He couldn’t afford to break down. Not yet.

Jester fell silent, and Molly could almost hear the sharp intake of breath from the other side of the phone. Her voice steeled itself, and she sounded more furious than he’d ever heard her. “What can I do?”

“Send him a message. Like in his head, not a text, like you do. Ask him if he’s okay. Tell him we’re coming for him, I just need to talk to some people, yeah?”

“Right. Right, I can do that,” Jester said. Her voice immediately changed back to its cheerful tone. “Hi, Caleb. Are you okay? Molly says we’re coming to get you, don’t worry. Um… We love you lots, okay?”

Molly couldn’t wait in the silence afterwards, every second at rest threatening to release the floodgates. This couldn’t be happening. Caleb’s anxieties were supposed to be irrational. Something he could soothe away, like a nightmare. Not something that took him away in the middle of the night. Not like this. Not again.

He was supposed to be able to stop them.

“Molly…”

He snapped, “What, Jester? What did he say?”

“He, um… he didn’t answer.”

Molly swallowed the lump in his throat. “Could Ikithon do that? Block a message?”

“Probably. I mean he also might not want to speak next to him? I don’t know. I’m sorry, Molly-”

“Can you tell everyone? I need to make more calls. We need to get to Rexxentrum now.”

He could hear the pain in her voice, but couldn’t focus on it. Couldn’t zero in on that when there was pain hidden so clearly in his own. “Of course, Molly. Take care of yourself. We’ll meet you at your place soon, okay?”

“Okay. I’ll be here.”

He started pacing, calling everyone he could think of. Beau was contacting the Cobalt Soul. The representatives from Whitestone were starting to travel over to meet everyone else, but it would still take a day for them to prepare to arrive. Wensforth answered Yussa’s phone and told Molly that as soon as the elf was available he would head to the Cobalt Soul in Rexxentrum. But it all still only took about thirty minutes. There wasn’t much else to _say._ Caleb was _gone_ and he hadn’t been able to do _anything._

Caleb had kept him from helping. Caleb had saved his life. Caleb loved him.

Frumpkin was going crazy.

Molly was having a hard time not doing the same, but at least he had something to focus on in the meantime. He got out a can of the fancy tuna and started mixing it up for himself while saving almost half of it just to feed to the cat. The only sliver of Caleb he had left at the moment.

He placed the little dish down with the tuna for the familiar and took a bite of his sandwich. If they managed to go anywhere tonight, he would need energy. It was a good thing he’d taken a nap.

"We're going to get him back and safe. I bet once he's alone he'll summon you back. You tell him we're coming for him, yeah?" Molly looked at the cat with a long sigh. "That's probably not how it works, huh?"

Frumpkin meowed forlornly at him, but took a few bites of the tuna.

A few hours later everyone had crowded into Molly’s apartment, talking strategies and trying to get in contact with all the right people. Beau said a representative from the Soul was coming to check out the apartment, but it was going to take a while. Probably not until the next day.

Everything was taking too long.

There wasn’t much they could do after calling everyone they possibly thought could help, but it was so late at night that no one was really around to do anything. Dairon was on their way once Beau told them about what had happened, but it would still take them time to get here.

Yasha stayed. She didn’t say anything, but she just never left. Beau had to leave to talk to Dairon on the phone privately back at their old apartment, and the others had slowly filtered out of his home as the late night stretched into the early morning. From the group chat it sounded like Beau had ended up at Jester’s, since neither wanted to be alone.

But Yasha stayed, setting up the fold out couch and pulling Molly to her chest.

Late into the night, Frumpkin let out a startled meow and disappeared from his spot against Molly’s leg, where he’d been purring all night. The little crackle of arcane energy that was so familiar brought tears to Molly’s eyes and the dam finally broke.

Even Frumpkin was gone.

He knew that probably meant Caleb was alive somewhere, safe enough to find comfort in his cat, but it was still too much.

“We’re going to get him back,” Yasha said, her voice calm and even, a rock to support what felt like Molly’s world crumbling around him.

He scrubbed at his face before she just pulled him closer. “He’s alone with-with them right now, and we can’t fucking do anything and he’s probably terrified and they’re going to hurt him again-”

“Right now he’s probably safe, since he summoned Frumpkin. It’s late, they’re probably letting him rest.”

Molly swallowed, shaking his head, “What if-what if-”

“Don’t do that to yourself.” Yasha held him a bit tighter. “I know these kinds of people. They took him alive, they want him alive.”

Molly tried to calm his breathing and focus on Yasha’s hand on his back. She was right, but his breath wouldn’t stop hitching into sobs. He’d been holding himself together all day and he was finally starting to shatter. “Yeah, you’re-you’re right.”

“If for some reason I’m wrong, Jester and Caduceus can fix things. And we’ll burn Ikithon to ashes so no one can do the same for him.”

He could hear the underlying rage in her voice, brimming close to the surface. Yasha had to be feeling similarly helpless. They were melee fighters, with limited magic and limited ability to do fuck all in situations like this.

These kinds of situations were ones he would defer to Caleb.

Molly couldn’t focus on the underlying meaning of her words. He couldn’t think about them killing Caleb, on that being what dispelled Frumpkin. That might have broken him completely.

“He… He told me he loved me, Yash,” he whispered, throat raw from sobbing.

She just stayed rubbing his back as he gathered his words.

“He told me he loved me and didn’t give me a chance to say it back. He doesn’t… He might go without knowing- I can’t-”

Yasha smoothed the hair from his face and grabbed him a box of tissues, which he took gratefully. She said, “You will get a chance to say it back. You will get your chance and I’ll get my chance to draw that old bastard’s blood.”

“I want to kill him. I want to watch him fucking suffer,” Molly said, anger overtaking some of his sadness until he just felt desperately raw.

She took a deep breath. “Me too. But we want to see him in jail, not you.”

“I don’t want to see him behind bars. He could get out. That won’t give Caleb peace. I want to see him fucking dead.” He couldn’t keep the venom from his voice.

Yasha nodded. “From what I know about the Empire, they don’t take kindly to men like that once they’ve served their purpose. Stealing a citizen of Nicodranas under protection of their most powerful wizard can’t be good for diplomacy.”

“You’re right. I know you’re right, but I still feel _useless.”_ Molly’s voice was practically a croak, and Yasha pulled back to look at him, hands grounding on either cheek.

“You’re not useless. Neither am I. We’ll help when it’s time. This is stuff… this is stuff for people like Beau and Fjord. But us, we’ll be the ones who get to draw blood. We have to be patient and trust our friends. Yeah?” she looked at him, and his heart just broke. Caleb was the first person Yasha had ever met who had gone through anything similar to her. A kindred spirit and a beloved friend. He could see the rage behind her eyes.

Molly nodded in her hands, knowing there was likely a similar fire boiling under the surface of his own. “I'd trust them with anything. If anyone can fix this, it’s all of us.”

Yasha nodded once, like the matter was settled. “Then we wait. And you rest. Where’s that tea Caduceus made to knock you out with no dreams?”

“Kitchen,” he mumbled, curling closer and not wanting to get up.

Saint that she was, Yasha just scooped him up with a blanket over his shoulders and brought him into the kitchen. She sat him up on the counter, started the kettle, and grabbed out two mugs and the loose leaf tea from the cupboard. Then she came back, resting her forehead on his.

“We’ll fix this.”


	81. Die Rückkehr

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Caleb ruminates on being back, tags have been updates again <3

### Chapter 81: Die Rückkehr

Caleb hadn’t expected Astrid and Wulf to be standing at the teleportation circle at the Soltryce Academy in Rexxentrum, but he supposed it made sense. He certainly wasn’t expecting them to look so miserable. It was like they were disappointed that Ikithon finally caught up to him. That was nice.

Maybe there was some sliver of his old friends in there.

Of course he showed nothing of his own emotions. It wouldn’t do well to show any of them that he was relatively pleased with how this all turned out.

They were dressed simply compared to Ikithon’s usual love of tradition and classical wizard robes. There were maze-like tattoos over their arms, winding through scars he knew looked just like his own. That was interesting. Perhaps that was the fruit of their torture.

He wasn’t brought back to the Sanatorium, as he wasn’t actually mad this time. He was sort of here of his own free will. They started in an all too familiar path through the school, no one else on the grounds other than a security guard. Caleb wondered if that was pure luck on Ikithon’s part or something done by design.

As soon as they were walking down the hallway towards the exit closest to Ikithon’s tower, he made one attempt to cast a spell. He tried to disintegrate his old master, hoping his old body would be weak enough to be taken out in one shot. Perhaps Astrid and Wulf would help him, if things looked promising. It would be the only chance he got, with his spellbooks now hundreds of miles away. But Wulf saw him trying to cast and made a startled sound, which alerted Ikithon. The old mage countered his spell with ease, and he knew he was truly stuck.

He didn’t have any more spells after casting disguises and comprehend languages all day, so he wasn’t strong enough to try again, even without the syringe Astrid was plunging into him. It wasn’t worth trying to avoid her.

“You seem to have forgotten much of your teaching, Bren,” Ikithon said, though the man was going blurry in his vision as the sedative kicked in. “It’s time we started over.”

His knees buckled and he could feel Wulf throw him over his shoulder like he weighed nothing.

People talked around him.

“Es tut mir leid, Bren. Should’ve stayed quiet,” Wulf mumbled almost imperceptibly in his ear.

Astrid said a few things to them all, attempting nonchalance and for the most part achieving it, but he could hear the underlying concern. That was nice.

There was a strange swirling voice in his head, light and friendly, but worried like Astrid’s.

_Jester._

Jester didn’t belong here. That didn’t make any sense. The haze of drugs swirled in his mind, and he knew it would be a nightmare to cast through it or try to think about anything too hard. He waited to keep hallucinating, wondering if he would hear Molly or Veth next, but he just heard Ikithon giving directions to his loyal pupils.

The next thing he knew, he was in a familiar place.

A small holding cell, one he’d been thrown in a few times, but not too often. For all that Ikithon was cruel, Bren usually avoided the worst punishments. It was the rewards that tended to hurt the most anyway, though the disappointment on his master’s face as he was sent away for solitary confinement had hurt more than anything back then. More than any crystals could ever.

Now, it was pleasant.

The stone floor was cold, and the matted pile of hay scratched at his skin, but he was still wrapped up in Mollymauk’s hoodie and everyone he loved was safe. This was good.

He could see the carvings on the floor blocking any means of scrying or other communication; Ikithon always covered his tracks. This room always made him feel like he’d been transported back in time, to a place that contained nothing but pain. The bucket that served as a chamber pot and the stone walls did little to dispel the illusion. He knew he was just in the basement of a modern building, but it felt like he was in a dungeon.

They’d taken his phone and component pouch, along with his belt and shoes, but he hadn’t been forced to change back into the hospital clothes they’d kept him in at the Sanatorium. At least not yet. He didn’t assume they’d let him build or keep a wardrobe. Not with how furious Ikithon was with him. But it felt good to be back on his own terms, knowing he was doing the right thing and that everyone was safe from his past.

After three hours with no one interrupting him and a bit of the drugs wearing off, he summoned Frumpkin to purr in his lap. The cat followed his orders to be silent, but still butted up against his chin near frantically, nuzzling as close as possible. Maybe Molly was right about thinking he could get registered as an emotional support animal.

His fur even smelled the faintest bit like Mollymauk.

Caleb blinked away the prickly feeling of tears gathering in his eyes.

There was no place for that here.

He had to be strong. Or at the very least, numb.

He could manage numb.

Telepathically he told the cat to wake him, silently, the moment he heard footsteps. Frumpkin agreed, curling up into a ball and purring so forcefully Caleb could feel it throughout his whole body. This was better than last time. Last time he was rarely left alone, and couldn’t use Frumpkin to soothe his nerves around others.

He could do this.

Caleb leaned his back against the wall and tried to sleep. With the haze, the purring cat, and the smell of Mollymauk’s hoodie still surrounding him, he found rest.

The next day felt like any day back in the Sanatorium. At the first light he woke to the sound of footsteps but this time he had Frumpkin pawing at his face. He poofed the familiar away quickly before two of Ikithon’s staff came in. More drugs were administered, and then he was alone again. At the Sanatorium he might have been given breakfast now, but he knew he hadn’t earned anything like that kindness. At least he’d been well fed enough these past few years that he wouldn’t lose strength as quickly. He had more options, though they were shrinking by the day.

Midday he was taken to the room with three wooden chairs. It wasn’t far from the room for solitary confinement. All of the rooms down here in the basement were hidden away, magically shielded with a layer of lead and a modified silence spell that kept down any screams. Still, some things had changed. Astrid and Wulf seemed to have graduated from this level of experimentation, and there was only one chair. But it was the same chair with the same worn leather straps that used to dig into his flesh, and he couldn’t help the small surge of panic in his chest as the staff strapped him down.

He kept it under control, kept his face in its emotionless mask, but that would be harder to manage as time went on and he started to lose himself.

Staff arranged everything for Ikithon before he arrived, and then he was left alone yet again. Caleb briefly wondered if he could send a message through the walls of this room, though he hadn’t been able to prepare the spell today from his spellbook. He’d never tried.

Perhaps it would be worth it to try, to say goodbye to Veth. To tell her he was okay, that he adored her and wanted her to live a safe and happy life for him.

But perhaps it was better for them all to just think he was dead. He didn’t want to cause any more pain. Caleb had caused people enough pain for one lifetime, and it was high time he stopped.

That didn’t stop him from composing the twenty five word message in his head. It was a stabbing pain into the numbness he’d gathered around himself, but his mind was wandering and he couldn’t help it.

_Veth, you’re the first love of my life that mattered. I’m glad I could help you, and reunite you with your family. You deserve every second of happiness._

Twenty eight words. 

_Veth, you’re my first love that mattered. You deserve every second of happiness you get, and I’m grateful to have been able to contribute._

Twenty four.

Jester would have been proud.

“You always were the best of my experimental subjects, Bren. And clearly the pain has made you stronger. Just not enough.” Ikithon’s voice broke him out of his drug addled musings.

Caleb should have known that the tattoos weren’t the end of his experimentation. From what he’d heard at Orly’s shop when he went with Molly, there were advancements in tattooing with enchanted gem dust, but nothing done with Residuum. The folks in Whitestone were very cautious about any human experimentation, he said, so he wouldn’t touch the stuff.

Funny, really, when Caleb thought about it. He didn’t know much about the Lord of Whitestone, but he doubted the man would like this room.

To be frank, he wasn’t sure anyone would like this room, and if they did he’d probably want to kill them.

Ikithon walked around the place with a calm disinterested look, checking the prepared scalpels and crystals. Caleb could feel his brain shutting down in preparation for the pain. He had enough cognition not to completely miss a direct order, but he knew there would be few.

Sit still.

Be quiet.

Then try to cast through the haze of drugs they had him back under.

And he was stronger now. So he was able to push through the haze, to bring flame to his palm despite the pain and his experiments only continued. Ikithon took careful notes on how the crystals reacted, how his magic worked in strange small flares with their power, how much pain he could take without passing out.

He was never given enough power to threaten Ikithon, never given enough pain to not be revived with a healing potion. Anything aimed at the old man was quickly dispelled and the pain only grew more intense.

Sometimes Wulf was around, though the man never liked to see him broken. Astrid was more common. She’d always held out some hope for him bouncing back. The fire in her eyes was just as bright as it had been when he left, and he wondered idly what she’d do once she finally killed Ikithon. Caleb would probably be long dead by then.

He floated from his day to day, taking in all the pain they could give him and taking great satisfaction in how it had all worked out for him. His friends were safe, and they would never have to deal with this man or the problems that surrounded him again. Ikithon had exactly what he wanted, and when Caleb died, he would have saved the second family that had meant so much to him.

Each night he could curl up with Frumpkin and be pleased with himself. Which was much better than the last time he was stuck in this situation, to say the least. Caleb was rarely left alone as a child, so cuddling with Frumpkin in a way looked down upon by those who saw familiars as tools was a rare luxury.

This was good, he ruminated, scratching a purring Frumpkin under the chin while trying not to move his forearms too much. The experiments were more frequent these days.

But he’d done the right thing.

Maybe someday Ikithon would let his guard down and Caleb could shove a scalpel through his temple.

Maybe with him here Ikithon would have to split his focus on whatever poor kids he was torturing these days. Maybe the kids would see him, or hear his screams, and get scared. Maybe he could convince one or two to run. That would be worth it.

Maybe once the Cobalt Soul finally confronted Ikithon, the old man would finally let him die along with his secrets. He’d disappear like countless others, nothing but ash on the wind. It would be a poetic ending, he supposed.

Maybe this was just what he deserved for everything he’d done.


	82. Waiting

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Molly and Veth wait for the signal

### Chapter 82: Waiting

Molly was pretty sure they’d set up a group chat with everyone in it but him, like when Caleb got himself hurt. He couldn’t really prove anything, but from the moment his friends arrived, he wasn’t left alone again.

Of course it might have been a coincidence. And it might have just been Veth, who showed up the next morning with an overnight bag that was mostly filled with weaponry. 

Veth had taken Yasha’s place after she left to go to work with her ringer on her phone turned all the way up and instructions to call immediately if anything happened. But Yasha needed to talk to Reani about possibly teleporting them to Rexxentrum if they couldn’t get transportation through the Cobalt Soul, so Molly was left with Veth. And if he was being perfectly fair, being around Molly probably wasn’t the most soothing experience right now. Mostly because he thought if he sat still for longer than thirty seconds he might explode.

And Veth was right there with him, pacing and calling people he had already called in an effort to put more pressure on them. An expositor from the Cobalt Soul came by with Beau and Dairon, taking pictures of the dispelled wards, and a documented record of Molly’s story taken on a voice recorder with Dairon taking enough notes that Molly almost felt good about it all, for once. Maybe that would get them somewhere.

But of course it was the word of a five year old nobody with no documentation in Nicodranas against the Archmage of Civil Influence of the Dwendalian Empire.

Even with Caleb gone, they would need more.

Veth helped Molly go through all the official channels and file a missing person’s report, managing to ignore the minimum required time needed to report someone missing with the fact that Molly had witnessed the kidnapping himself and how Veth screamed into the receiver whenever someone brushed them off.

Even with all that, it was two o’clock in the afternoon by the time there was no one left to call, again. Yasha was still at work, Beau was still working her ass off with the people from the Cobalt Soul, with Fjord accompanying to do any other additional research, get coffee, or just keep everyone there focused. He was good at that. The folks from Whitestone had finally arrived, and even Yussa left his tower to go see if he could help out. It seemed like things were going well, if slowly. Caduceus was working with Pumat, hoping the other firbolg would be willing to testify to corroborate Caleb’s story and explain how much abuse he’d suffered under Ikithon’s tutelage. Jester had dropped off lunch for them and hung out for an hour, but she left not soon after too. She had gone back to the café to prepare for them shutting down for a time, making sure nothing would be left out to get stale or spoil.

So it was just Veth and Molly, alone in an apartment that should have had Caleb in it, trying to find some comfort though they were the ones left behind.

Molly had turned on the television earlier, but he found himself skipping almost every channel since too many things reminded him of Caleb. He wanted to watch crappy reality tv and curl up with Caleb on the couch while he read a book and they complained idly about the stupid show. There was no way he was watching the new episode of the _Great Marquesian Baking Show_ without him. But there was no way he could sit in the quiet, constantly waiting for the soft sound of Caleb walking down the hallway with a purring Frumpkin.

Eventually he settled on an awful action movie that neither he nor Veth bothered to pay attention to.

“You’ve been really good for him, you know.”

Molly blinked, looking up and watching Veth inspect a button on her small yellow vest. “What?”

“You’ve been good for him. My boy. He loves you. You help him realize he can enjoy nice things.”

He took a breath that he wished didn’t shake as much as it did. “I’m trying. After this… I don’t know if it’ll be easier or harder. I was hoping to put Ikithon in the ground before we got too serious.”

“He was serious about you from the moment you helped him with the apartment fire. He’s just a terrible coward when it comes to his own feelings and what he wants and what he thinks he deserves. And this… this will probably set him back. But if we can really take down Ikithon, that will help. A lot.” She sighed softly, frowning as the button started to come loose.

“Give that here,” Molly said, extending his hand and pulling the embroidery materials out of the little drawer beside him.

Veth slipped it off and passed it over, letting him secure the button as he formulated what he wanted to say.

He eventually chose, “We’re going to need to make sure he goes to Pumat’s regularly after this. Maybe we can alternate getting lunch beforehand and walking him. Yasha would too. And I think Cad’s done that for him before.”

She nodded carefully. “We should get the wards set up again, for when he comes back. He needs to feel safe and loved.”

Molly took a deep breath that hitched enough that it was always to a sob. “I was waiting, to make sure he was comfortable. He told me he loved me, then left before I could say it back.”

Veth grew quiet. “I’d say he knows, but he’s so dense about that kind of thing. He thinks that he’s insanely lucky to have ever found you. That you walk on water.”

Molly snorted, though it was definitely more of a sob. “He can be such a dumbass sometimes. And Fjord’s the one with that spell.”

She snorted along with him. “He really can be. He should have teleported all three of you into the café. With me and Jester, we could’ve killed that bastard.”

“He was terrified, Veth. He looked… he looked like he was feebleminded again. There was nothing but fear.”

Molly heard her take a deep breath of her own as she broke out the flask and took a long swig before handing it to him. He stared at it a moment before taking a swig. It was still terrible, and he handed it right back, along with the secured button. As much as he wanted to forget everything that had ever happened to him again, he needed to stay sharp.

Caleb might need him.

“Don't you usually pick up Luc from school around now?” he asked, not wanting to kick her out and be alone again, but also not wanting to leave the poor kid abandoned.

She shook her head. “He’s sleeping over at Kiri’s tonight. The Schusters were happy to take him for a night, and Yeza will be around tomorrow. If he needs to, he has vacation time.”

“I’m sorry.”

Veth shrugged. “It’s weird. But Caleb might need me. And so I’m here. Yeza knows that, and so does Luc. My life doesn’t revolve around just them, even though they’re a priority. They’re safe and happy, and they know I’d be there if I could. That’s enough.”

She trailed off before murmuring, “And Caleb doesn’t have that right now. So I’m here.”

Eyes pricking with tears, Molly just nodded. “You’re a good mom. I don’t know if you hear that enough, but you are.”

Veth smiled at him, but took another swig. “Doesn’t always feel like it, sometimes. But I know I’m trying my best.”

“That’s all anyone can ask.”

“I suppose.”

She let the silence hang, and Molly didn’t know what else to say. He felt like he was numbing around the edges to try and dull the aching pain that had been overwhelming him since he watched Caleb get taken. So when Veth suddenly sat upright, it startled him from wallowing in the nothingness.

“Have you ever made bread?”

He raised a brow at her. “No?”

“Caleb loves fresh bread.”

Molly nodded slowly. “I know that much. He likes the rolls at the bakery too much I think. You should start putting vegetables in them so he’s actually eating something besides empty carbs.”

“Well, _you_ should learn to bake bread. It cheers him up, and it’s good for your soul. Jester showed me.”

With that she was dragging a stool into his kitchen and rifling through cabinets. Molly followed, happy to at least stand and move a bit even though everything felt hopeless. He helped her find the flour and some packets of yeast he didn’t even know they had in the fridge.

“You can keep the dough in the fridge for a few days until he comes back then stick it in the oven. If you brush it with olive oil, thyme, and salt, it tastes like something his mother used to make. He told me that once, and that’s why he loves our rolls so much,” she explained, clearly happy to have something to do with her hands, using her mage hand to grab a big mixing bowl and having Molly write down the recipe on his phone as they went.

He could see why Jester would tell people it was good for your soul. Kneading the dough was just as satisfying as it looked on the _Great Marquesian Baking Show._ It smelled pleasant and the fact that they were doing something nice for Caleb for when he got back helped him feel a little bit more normal. It reminded him that Caleb really was coming back, and he shouldn’t be as fatalistic as his favorite wizard.

With their bread rising in the kitchen, they fell back onto the couch, and ordered a pizza for delivery. Molly liked spending time with Veth, once she stopped being so worried about how he might hurt Caleb. When it was just the two of them, worried about Caleb for the same reasons, it was almost nice to have a kindred spirit, even if the level of anxiety in the apartment was probably reaching noxious levels.

“We should call Pumat. See if we could get him to set the wards back up,” she said softly, after another long swig from her flask. The pizza wouldn’t be here for a few more minutes, and they were starting to feel stagnant again.

He nodded, watching her dig out her phone. Veth disappeared to call Pumat and Molly’s phone lit up with Beau’s number. He dove over the couch for it.

“Can we go yet? Did you get the warrant, or the Crownsguard?”

Beau’s tone instantly made his heart sink. “Not exactly.”

"What do you mean?" he said slowly, taking each word carefully so he didn’t sound too vicious. He didn’t want to jump to conclusions.

Beau sighed, sounding completely strung out. "They said they need more evidence for a warrant, more than just the word of someone they don't know. I'm sorry, Molly. I'm trying to get them to go as fast as they can, but it might be like a week-"

"We're _not_ leaving him with Ikithon for a _week."_ He did nothing to hide the venom in his voice. In fact, he almost slipped into Infernal. It's not like he could actually blind Beau from this distance anyways.

She snapped right back, "I know, I'm doing everything I can. Just, if we want to do this right and not get Caleb killed, we need to get the Cobalt Soul and hopefully the Crownsguard behind us. Dairon and I are working on it-"

Molly was pacing now, wishing he had Frumpkin to pet. All the cat toys were just a depressing reminder of how Caleb was missing. Stolen from his home.

Then he saw the remote controlled treat dispenser.

"Wait."

Beau sounded, if possible, even more annoyed, "Wait what? I was in the middle of talking-"

"I think I have proof."

"Proof? How?"

Eyes wide, he walked over to the little white contraption. "I think… I think I got it on video."

“You think? Molly, that could be huge, what are you talking about?”

“Are you good with tech stuff?” he asked, lifting up the machine and looking at the little camera.

“Not the best. I’m not miserable at it either, though. Why? Should I call Veth? That’s more her thing.”

“Yeah, she’s already here, don’t worry about it. I need to call someone else too, I think. I’ll tell you if I found anything as soon as I figure this out,” he said, holding the ridiculous cat toy like it was a precious magical item.


	83. Bren

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Caleb, Bren, thinks about gods. (Some classic Widogast introspection, folks.)

### Chapter 83: Bren

It had always been difficult for Bren to believe in benevolent gods.

Sure, there were forces beyond what the mortals could control, lifespans beyond what they could comprehend, and there were ways that those stronger beings reached out and tugged at the lives of creatures below them. It would be impossible not to see the strange things his friends were able to achieve by calling on their various deities. But gods? Beings who deserve worship? What made it so that they could demand worship from those creatures they assumed were below them?

It always seemed like a stretch, to believe that life was the work of some god, and if he prayed to the Archeart he would suddenly pass all his exams, win his professor’s favor, and live a happy, lucky life.

He could understand the humans who thought they could use technology to fight back against the gods who demanded worship. How could he believe in benevolent gods who helped the world beyond the divine gate when he’d seen all that he had?

How could he believe there was a just god looking down on him when he prayed to the Archeart to get into the Soltryce Academy alongside Astrid and Eadwulf, just to be snapped up by Trent Ikithon months later? Was he praying _wrong?_ Was he being too selfish? Was this all powerful deity irritated that this child couldn’t pray for them openly? That their worship was banned in the Empire?

Was that why he was abandoned?

What reason was there to abandon a child?

What reason did the gods have to ignore his suffering as he sat in this very room years ago and prayed for forgiveness, for mercy? Was he supposed to be in pain?

What reason was there to ignore his prayers as he begged the world not to take his parents from him? To let them live at the risk of his own life, the risk of Ikithon’s and even Astrid and Wulf’s, anyone who could listen to those _screams_ and not be moved? How could they sit and listen to those screams?

Perhaps that was why Astrid poisoned her parents. She only had to hear them choke.

Maybe if she had chosen fire, she would have broken alongside Bren.

Maybe if she had chosen fire she wouldn’t be using tweezers to pull used residuum crystals out of his bleeding forearms while he tried not to pass out from the pain.

He was never a strong man.

Did his parents pray as they died? Did they think about the mercy of some forgiving god looking down on them as they burned alive, skin sloughing off their bodies as they returned to ash? Did the gods hear his parents scream and do nothing?

How could Bren ever believe in a loving god?

Perhaps a dark god of some evil inclination had taken a liking to Ikithon. He never saw the man pray, and he was sure that he believed first and foremost in arcane studies and scientific pursuits. Would an evil god help one who didn’t pray for them? Just for the sake of spreading more evil and chaos into the world?

Maybe the gods abandoned Bren because he was simply being taught by a man who didn’t believe in them.

Maybe the Soltryce Academy was just a horrible, godless place.

His little cell felt like one, for sure.

There was no way to believe in a god that cared for him when he had nothing but the stone walls around him. He mused as he stroked Frumpkin’s fur, then looked down at the little familiar. The cat butted against his chin and began to purr more viciously, as if the soothing vibrations could chase away everything bad in Bren- no, in Caleb’s life.

But these past few years, there were times when gods had given him their gifts through other people.

He had come to believe quite strongly that the Wildmother seemed to help those who worshipped her the best she could. But with nature declining and the world rising up with concrete and cobblestones around what once were lush forests, there was only so far that she could reach.

Perhaps if Caleb had prayed to her as a child, she would have kept him safe in the fields and forests of Blumenthal.

Of course he never knew anyone who worshipped her until after he left the Empire.

And even the Clays, the most devout of her worshippers, were laid waste by that awful gorgon, left to rot as statues. One could say that it was fate that Caduceus was led back to his family, and that the Wildmother made sure they would all be found safe and sound for their reunion. But was it fate for them to suffer in the first place?

Was that the fate of all mankind? 

Discussions about fate with Caduceus made his stomach turn. He couldn’t believe that his parents were meant to die. That he was destined to be a vicious murderer. To believe he was some puppet of the gods was too much.

The Stormlord seemed to make the most sense to him. When he was pleased, he gave Yasha strange blessings. She was able to complete small tasks or assignments and receive favor. It seemed like a relatively equivalent exchange, at least from where Caleb was standing.

It made sense that he wouldn’t listen to a child’s prayers when the child had done nothing for him in return. That at the very least, he could understand.

The god that baffled him the most had to be Jester’s. Caleb strongly believed that Jester’s Traveler was some kind of warlock patron situation gone sideways. He had gotten a few glimpses of this “Traveler” and he looked far too… normal to be a god. Not that he looked human, or even elven by any means, but he didn’t seem quite as otherworldly and ethereal as the other gods.

He had been waiting for the day when Jester would need support with the whole situation, but nothing had arisen as of yet. Hopefully their other friends would be similarly cautious. But he knew no matter what, they would support her if she needed help. The same was true with Fjord and his old patron, though hopefully Avantica was headfirst into a volcano by now.

He didn’t know what to believe about the Moonweaver.

When he found out that Mollymauk prayed to her on occasion, just because he liked her, Caleb had done his research. Sehanine, goddess of moonlight and the autumn season, as well as the patron of illusions and misdirection. A deity somewhat chaotic, but mostly good, largely considered to be the deity of love and protector of the trysts of lovers.

He saw what Mollymauk liked in her. 

Like the tarot cards, Caleb felt like he should give her a chance since Molly believed in her.

And if she was really the protector of lovers, he probably owed her every moment of bliss he’d managed to steal with the purple tiefling, whether his beauty was illuminated in moonlight or otherwise. It wasn’t as if he deserved it.

Did their good luck just run out? It was clear that Caleb- Bren was running on borrowed time. He hadn’t really been able to start a completely new life. Just stretch and twist his old one to feel something like human again.

He had thought about asking Mollymauk if he wanted to travel to Tal’Dorei and trek through the Cliffkeep Mountains to see the Moonweaver’s Ribbons. It was hard to find descriptions of the ceremony that weren’t just “ethereal” or “beautiful,” but he gathered that there was some sort of enchanted ribbon or fabric made to light up the night sky as they swirled around on the backs of wyverns with riders in the sky near the Elvenpeaks.

Of course he was a little motivated about the idea of traveling somewhere with just Molly, camping in a hotel the first night then being able to hike and finally use the mansion spell. When he first started planning it, he had a separate room for everyone. His own was bare bones, just enough to sleep in each night, since it felt strange to create things like a matching stained glass window with things he loved for himself. What would he even put on it? A cat? He even thought about creating the room with the wooden chairs, up in the tallest part of the tower, just so he could see it again. So he could remember the pain.

He was glad he didn’t.

Instead he’d started creating the perfect room for him _and_ Molly, and he had been excited to show it to him. It had the gaudiest tapestries he could find replicated from a video he saw of a shopping district in Marquet, and books he thought Molly might like, or might like to be read to out of, and trinkets he’d found online for both him and Veth’s room. Little lights floated around the room like a peculiar combination of fireflies and a miniature version of the dancing light spell. It made the light flicker like candlelight, especially with the big fireplace.

He wanted a chance to show it to Molly, before he left.

But it was better for him to be safe.

Maybe someday Molly would go and watch the Moonweaver’s ribbons without Caleb. The biggest holy day of Sehanine was approaching, with the longest full moons of the decade coming within the next few years. It would be more like a festival than just a lone pilgrimage, especially since the holy day concurring with the Winter Solstice was quite rare. Elves with their longer lifespans probably would see plenty of those days, but he and Molly would have been lucky to see the one. Not that Caleb was ever quite that lucky. Having even more than a year with Mollymauk at his side would have been too good to be true.

There was something about the thought of Molly visiting them with someone else, or even alone that twisted like a dull knife through the numbness in his body. He shook the feeling away and returned to his thoughts. Molly would return to his happy life without Caleb, and Caleb was grateful to have known him at all.

The Moonweaver’s season, autumn, had always been his favorite. It was the season of harvest, of bountiful plates on the table and warm fresh bread in the oven. His mother’s garden would have been producing fresh fruits and vegetables all summer, but now they had to eat or can what remained before the first frost. There wasn’t ever a single hungry night in autumn. 

The air would get crisp and he could go walking with Frumpkin, the original Frumpkin, out in the woods to look for interesting plants he might use for spell components or potions. He could practice simple cantrips and revel in the cool, fresh air of Blumenthal. Not too cold to need any winter furs or heavy cloaks, but not too warm as to sweat through his favorite clothes. And if he fell and tore the elbow or knee of his clothing he knew he could rely on his mother to patch it up for him.

He would roll up the long sleeves of his thick flannel shirts back then with no worries. 

Worries were hard to find at all back then.

Love was just as abundant as the harvest.

As Caleb drifted off to sleep, he wished he had a window. Both Catha and Ruidus would be full tonight.

Maybe if he could see the moons he would bother to pray, but he knew no gods reached here, even if they hadn’t abandoned him.

Maybe Mollymauk could appreciate the moons for him, wherever he was. Knowing that he was free to do so, partly because of Caleb, that was enough.


	84. Prayer

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Molly has a rough night the day before the attack on Ikithon's tower.

### Chapter 84: Prayer

_Nonagon._

Caleb was sitting, curled up in a ball around Frumpkin on the floor of a stone room, and though it was pitch black in the room, Molly could see perfectly. He could see the bright copper of Caleb’s hair, and the blooms of red under the bandages wrapped around his forearms. The man was still in Molly’s hoodie, stroking Frumpkin’s fur rhythmically, just like he might have after a long day at work, but he looked bare and small without his book holsters and component pouch.

His eyes seemed a million miles away, glazed over.

_Empty._

Molly’s breath caught in his throat at the sight and it just seemed so _real._

_“Caleb?”_

His voice sounded far away, like he was calling out through water, or a different plane. But he was _there._ The stagnant air of the room was stale and sour, like a basement, thick enough to choke on. If the image of Caleb with blood all over him wasn’t enough to send him into a panic, the smell sure was. 

Caleb only sighed softly, mumbling, “I suppose I should try to sleep, Frumpkin. It’s late.”

Frumpkin only purred louder and his eyes slipped shut as Molly felt tears prick in the corners of his eyes just at the sound of Caleb’s voice.

_We could save him, together. The power is within your reach. Find the tome and bring us-_

“Molly? What the fuck is going on?”

He was sitting straight up on the bed, heart racing.

He was in a hotel room, sleeping alone in the bed beside one shared by Beau and Yasha. There was a room for himself and Caleb, but he hadn’t wanted to be alone in a strange place, even if they were going to take down Ikithon’s tower tomorrow morning. But Beau wasn’t sound asleep beside him like she had been when he’d fallen asleep.

Beau was in his face in one of Yasha’s old tee shirts, holding his shoulders and shaking him forcefully. It would have been a rude awakening under any circumstances, but the fact that it was the first time these strange dreams had happened without Caleb, not to mention just having seen him in pain, Molly was barely holding the pieces of himself together. “Dude, what the fuck? You wouldn’t wake up until I shook you and all your fucking eye tattoos were fucking glowing-”

“Fuck,” he swore, scrubbing at his eyes and trying to adjust to the dim light of the room from the strange true sight of the dream. Before he knew it Yasha was beside him, taking him up into her arms.

“What can we do?” she asked, interrupting Beau’s stream of questions as he curled into her broad chest and tried to keep his heaving breaths from devolving into sobs. She was warm, fresh from the covers of her own bed, and the tee shirt she wore to bed was soft on his cheek from years of use as a night shirt.

Molly tried to answer her question, to think about anything useful, anything other than Caleb, curled up and in pain somewhere he couldn’t reach.

“Cad. Can you get Caduceus?” he asked, unsure if the firbolg would have any of the tea Molly had forgotten at home, but unsure what else to do. At the very least, Caduceus knew about the city and the dreams.

Beau slipped off the bed. “I’ll go get him, if you’re good here, Yash?”

She nodded her assent and let the monk slip away. “Is touch helping?” she asked, knowing the routine with his nightmares, but just double checking.

Nodding, Molly shifted so his horn was poking her less. “Yes. You’re a charm, Yasha. As always,” he said, though his voice was still a touch too brittle, too sharp around the edges. The love was there, but it was hidden under anxiety and terror. “Could you be a love and pass me my phone?”

She did so wordlessly, beginning to rub grounding circles in his back and breathing exaggerated breaths he could follow without thinking too hard. He did his best to do so, while typing into the notes app on his phone.

> _2:13 am_
> 
> _Dream:_
> 
> _Nonagon again_
> 
> _It said that it could help me help Caleb. It showed me where he was, in Ikithon’s tower. He couldn’t hear me. It was pitch dark in there, but I could see everything. He’s underground somewhere, that’s for sure. No windows, one door._
> 
> _He's hurt. He’ll need healing right away._
> 
> _Find the tome?_
> 
> _Bring us something_
> 
> __

He tossed the phone away from him when he had written down all he cared to remember, curling back into Yasha’s grip to focus on bringing his breathing back to normal. It had been ages since she’d helped him with a nightmare, but he was always grateful for her steady, calm presence.

The door opened then, Caduceus padding in wearing pink flannel pajamas covered in little teal flowers. “It happened again?”

Molly turned to see Cad carrying in a hot plate, a kettle, a few mugs, and a canister of tea with “Mr. Mollymauk” written on it with masking tape. “Mr. Clay, you’re a sight for sore eyes,” he said softly, straightening a bit from Yasha’s grip. Cad hadn’t ever seen him so broken down, and he wasn’t eager to start now. “I’d say it’s too late to talk, but I think this is important before tomorrow.”

Caduceus nodded and plugged in the hot plate to set up the kettle. “Of course. Would you like to talk alone?”

“They’ve already seen everything, might as well, get them in the loop,” Molly sighed.

Beau bristled, “This happens a lot? What the fuck is going on?”

Molly took a deep breath, trying to gather the fragmented pieces of himself up well enough to tell the story without having Caleb’s hand to hold. Before he could start, Caduceus asked, “Would you like me to say what I know first? That way you can have a moment to think.”

Sinking back against Yasha again, Molly nodded. “Thanks, Cad.”

“Of course, Molly. Some time ago, while meditating I communed with the Wildmother. She showed me a sentient, malevolent city, hungry and searching. It’s this same city that haunts Molly’s dreams, calling him strange names from his past. I believe, Beau, that Caleb asked you to grant him access to research in the Cobalt Reserves around Exandria so he could look into it.”

A seed of guilt twisted in Molly’s gut as he remembered how Caleb had gone back to Rexxentrum, repeatedly, for him, using up all of his best spells. He knew this wasn’t his fault exactly; it was Ikithon’s. But that didn’t mean that if Molly’s past wasn’t horrible, it wouldn’t have happened. If Molly’s past had stayed fucking _put_ like it was supposed to, he would be fast asleep with Caleb back in Nicodranas. Caleb would have reminded him to drink Cad’s tea and they would have curled up with Frumpkin among all their soft blankets and pillows.

Caduceus finished describing all he knew about the city, and everything he’d found with Caleb. “And now, I believe we have some new information, yes?” he asked, looking back at Molly.

He nodded, glad when Yasha’ started rubbing his back again. “It called me Nonagon again, and told me… and showed me Caleb. I think it was really him. Usually I see the city, but I was in a room with gray stone walls, in the dark, but I could see in color. Caleb was curled up in the corner, petting Frumpkin. I wanted to talk to you guys since we’re the ones going in there tomorrow. Well, and Jester. But I’m hoping we can convince her to stay with Veth and Fjord.”

They had managed to convince the people planning the attack on Ikithon’s estate that the stronger members of the Mighty Nein should come in as backup, but they’d gotten Dairon to insist on only a few. Healers and heavy hitters were allowed. Fjord would stay back with Veth and make sure that everything went smoothly with detaining Trent.

Molly was focused on the rescue mission and nothing else. No matter what anyone said (and they had all tried), no one could convince him to wait to see Caleb. He didn’t care what state the man was in when he found him, so long as he was breathing. He’d carry him away from Ikithon himself if he had to.

Caduceus’s eyes were wide. “It showed you Caleb?”

Molly nodded. “He was underground. He’s hurt, pretty badly. We’ll need healers coming with us to look for him. Maybe Jester could stay with the group detaining Ikithon and you could come look for him with us, Cad.”

He said, “That’s fine by me. I’ve had enough fighting for a while, if we can help it.”

“I mean, they might move him around during the day, I don’t know, but it seemed like a better starting point than we had yesterday.”

Beau nodded. “I’ll text Dairon so they see it tomorrow morning.”

“Thanks, Beau. The other new thing it said was to ‘find the tome,’ but I have no fucking clue what that means. Caleb is the book expert,” he finished with a mumble. Caduceus handed him a mug of tea then, to which he smiled softly, watching the little egg shaped metal thing bob in the water and turn the liquid into its soft honeyed color.

Caduceus accepted thanks as he gave Beau and Yasha mugs as well, passing around a little plastic owlbear filled with honey. “The next time I commune with the Wildmother, I’ll ask about any kind of book. She might be able to see that better, since it sounds like it’s actually on this plane of existence.”

“I can also go with Caleb to research the next time he feels up to it, keep an eye on him,” Beau said, sitting up a little straighter. 

Before Molly could say he was going to keep Caleb at home for at least a month, and probably not take his eyes off him for a week, Cad spoke up again. It was like he could read people’s minds. “I think he should probably take it easy for a while. But maybe we could make a day of it and all go somewhere fun.”

That firbolg was a blessing wrapped up in a seven foot tall body and topped with perfect pink hair. Planning a group outing with all their friends would probably take two or three months so they could all get a day free. When there wasn’t someone in danger, it took a long while for everyone’s schedules to line up.

Caduceus said his goodnights and went back to his shared room with Fjord across the hall. Molly hoped they hadn’t woken Veth and Jester. There was no way he was telling them he saw Caleb covered in his own blood.

Instead of going back to bed like Beau and Yasha, Molly sat in the small, stiff chair of their hotel room, thumbing over the small pendant to the Moonweaver like a worry stone and wondering how people prayed. Caduceus and Fjord meditated, Jester talked to her weird god, and Yasha left chasing storms.

None of that seemed to make much sense.

He looked up out the window at the two moons, sighing softly as he continued to spin the necklace in his fingers. Idly he wondered if Caleb could see them where he was resting, then remembered the small room with no window. At least he hoped Caleb was finally resting. It was too late not to. Yasha and Beau had already fallen fast asleep, snoring like no tomorrow and out like lights with Caduceus’s tea.

Molly whispered into the dark of the room, “I don’t really do this, so I’m not sure how. But I know you’re supposed to protect lovers. If you could protect him… I don’t know if it’s too late to ask or not, but he definitely needs it.” 

Molly chewed his lip, feeling like he was talking to nothing.

He let his head fall against the back of the chair, unsure if his horn was ripping open the stuffing and honestly not caring at all as he fell asleep under the two full moons.


	85. Hope of Home

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is the longest chapter yet, I think! Have fun storming the castle!

### Chapter 85: Hope of Home

The hours were blurring a bit, as they always did under the influence of the drug cocktail Ikithon kept Bren on. He always knew what time of day it was when he stopped to think about it, but it was hard to tell if it was three in the afternoon days after he’d been taken or weeks. 

There were enough cuts up and down his forearms to make him think it was weeks, but the experiments were just getting more intense. Ikithon had no real qualms about pushing him past the edge of unconsciousness these days. They had no more pretenses between them. It had never been student and teacher. It was a brutal game of cat and mouse that Bren had no hope of winning.

Astrid tried to talk to him on occasion, telling him to give in, to just go along with Ikithon’s plan. Telling Bren that Ikithon was getting senile, they could probably take him if all three of them worked together and pretended to play nice. Wulf would follow her lead so long as Bren joined them. He never listened to her. It was hard to remember, but he wasn’t _really_ Bren anymore, anyways. Even if he forgot sometimes, under all the pain.

She tried worse tactics. Somehow she figured out who Nott was, coming in disguised as the little goblin girl one day after the experiments. But she was too tall and her voice was all wrong.

"Caleb, I need you to come with me," she said. But she was holding the key, not a lockpick. And she was about a foot too tall.

It was just confusing at first. He felt like he had slipped back in time. "Nott? How did you get here?"

"I snuck in, but I'll need your help getting out. I need you to help me kill Ikithon."

It made sense then. Of course it was Astrid. She wouldn’t really know Veth.

“Go away,” he muttered, turning away from the vision, though he couldn’t move much in the wooden chair. Even if it was just that, a vision, seeing his little friend hurt. It twisted the knife in the open wound that was leaving his friends behind. He could ignore the pain if he didn’t think about them, but this was too much.

Nott’s face twisted in anger, and not the righteous anger he was used to, a more insidious type. It only proved it wasn’t her, even before she broke and said, “Bren- Caleb, just come with me! I can get you out of here!”

“Leave me alone, Astrid.”

It bothered him that she knew who Nott was, but it didn’t seem to have anything to do with Ikithon’s greater plans, just her own. He likely didn’t need to worry. Especially if she didn’t actually know Veth. Astrid only cared about him and her own power.

One day she kicked down the door as Beauregard.

He cocked his head. “That is much more convincing, I’ll give you that.”

“The fuck are you talking about? Gods, Caleb, we've been worried sick and that’s the first thing you say to me?” She stormed across the room, starting to mess with the shackles. Odd that she didn’t just grab the key before she came in. Ikithon would have given it to her. He liked her enough, even if he hated Caleb.

He frowned. “At least you got the name right this time. I don’t think she’d be that open about worrying though.”

Then she slapped him across the cheek. He blinked rapidly a few times, the drugs making the whole room spin. “Astrid?”

“Do I fucking look like your ex-girlfriend? Molly’s gonna lose it; you look like shit.”

He couldn’t register what she was saying. “Beauregard?”

“No, King Dwendal, asshole.”

Every muscle in his body seized up as it sunk in that she was really here. “It is not safe for you to be here.”

“Where’s the selfish prick who would do anything to watch old Icky Thong burn? I wanna talk to that Caleb, not whoever this is, okay?” Beau patted his smarting cheek firmly, forcing him to look up at her. She rolled her eyes at his expression. “Trent’s in magic fucking shackles right now, dude. Calm down. I guess that’s kind of a shitty thing to say, huh?”

Caleb shook his head. “He _what?”_

“You know that testimony you gave to the Cobalt Reserve last month? They weren’t just twiddling their thumbs over it; everyone wanted to see that bastard go down. Torturing children and kidnapping of one of the ones that got away? That treat video thing you have for Frumpkin, the thing you got to give him treats while you were out and he was stuck at home, whatever, I forget what it's called. But Molly realized it caught the whole fucking kidnapping thing on video. 

“We, uh, might need you to testify in court, since that was all our evidence. But you’ll get to watch Ikithon die or rot. Or die after rotting, I guess. You’ll outlive him if I have to get Caduceus to keep you alive myself.” Beau was grinning, but still having trouble with the straps on his arms. She pulled out a lockpick but still seemed to be struggling.

“Fucking hells. Should’ve brought Veth in here, but I thought you might not want to see her yet.”

He let his head fall backwards over the edge of the chair, trying to get his brain to catch up to everything she’d just said. “It’s a magic lock. You might need to find someone with magic, or the key. Could you get me a healer before anyone sees me? The drugs are… muddling everything.”

“They fucking drugged you? Gods, why? Actually, I don’t think I want to know. Who would you prefer? Caduceus and Jester both came. Well, everyone came, but they insisted on coming inside. And Yasha and Molly.”

He desperately wanted to see everyone. But this was an easy answer. He would only hurt his little blue friend in this state. “Caduceus. He might be able to dispel the magic on the lock for you as well.”

“You gonna be okay alone here for a minute?” Beau asked, standing up.

He blinked. Did it matter? “Sure.”

And she was gone with a quick clap to his shoulder. Caleb expected to feel lost without her presence to ground him, but he could hear her screaming in the hallway for Caduceus.

He could hear another voice before he got lost in his thoughts, frantic. Familiar.

Warm.

Caleb’s heart leapt into his throat as two halves of him warred with each other. He desperately wanted to see Mollymauk. He also very much didn’t want Molly to ever see him like this. Hells, he was still bleeding. The dull ache meant Trent hadn’t taken out the crystal; he didn’t even have to look to know what had happened. To know there was a crimson puddle gathering beneath him, sticky and still hot.

He wasn’t sure how he didn’t notice Trent leaving the room while there was still a crystal in his arm, but he was glad for the stronger haze of drugs at least for the pain.

Well. Molly had seen worse, though despite having perfect memory of his brain being turned to mush for a day, it didn’t make much sense to Caleb in retrospect. Feeblemind and perfect memory were a strange combination. That and having his throat slit back in the swamp. At least he could take care of himself in this state.

He only registered a blur of purple before he was being hugged against the chair, Molly halfways to sobbing on his knees. But he still choked out in Infernal, _"I love you too. And you're never allowed to leave before I say it back."_

Caleb’s world was still hazy and fuzzy around the edges, but the weight of Molly’s arms around him, so _warm_ and _real,_ brought him to tears almost immediately. It wasn’t quite like a weight had been lifted off his chest, but more like he’d escaped the bounds of gravity and was floating or flying. He felt lighter, like the world made sense.

Molly wound his fingers in Caleb’s hair, holding him like he might disappear again as their foreheads pressed together. After a chaste kiss that held too much pain, he slipped back into common, “Never again. You have no more excuses for leaving like that. Never again. Swear it.” Molly’s voice shook and Caleb didn’t even have the heart to tell him he should move to not get blood on his shirt.

“It sounds like I won’t ever have to, thanks to you and Beau.”

“That’s not good enough,” Molly said, pulling back and brushing the matted sweaty hair out of Caleb’s eyes.

Caleb wanted to do the same, move his hands through Molly’s curls, pull him closer, but his hands were still strapped down. “I swear to you, that if he’s really unable to hurt anyone, I will never leave you like that again.”

“That’ll have to do,” Molly sighed softly, pulling a bit further away but keeping a firm hand on Caleb’s shoulder as Caduceus came in and quickly dispelled the lock.

“There you go, Mr. Caleb.”

He smiled softly, rubbing at his wrists. There were none of the gashes he used to get thrashing as a young person, but they were still sore. They’d bruise tomorrow. “Thank you very much, Mr. Clay.”

“Oh, would you like some healing? Or do we take that out first?” Clay frowned at the glowing green crystal still embedded in his arm.

Caleb winced at the sharp intake of breath from Mollymauk beside him as the tiefling saw exactly what state he was in. He'd done a better job hiding the pain than he realized.

"Oh right, evidence. This will be good to have pictures of," Beau mumbled, taking out her phone and beginning to photograph Caleb's forearms. He couldn't bring himself to care what she was doing.

Caleb rubbed his wrists and looked around the room. The tray was still there. "I'll get it. They can shatter if you're not careful, once they’ve been used." He worked the tweezers slowly, appreciating the painkiller yet again. The cuts would hurt tomorrow. Hell, they would start to hurt when the drugs wore off with Caduceus’s healing, but for now he was dealing with the pain. "The splinters are the worst," he mumbled, letting the crystal and tweezers clatter to the metal tray and attempting to stand.

Caleb didn't know how difficult it was without two orderlies or guards moving him and no healing potion to keep him from the brink of death. But Mollymauk was there, keeping his legs from buckling and Caduceus was right beside him, hands pulsing with his earthy green healing magic as he straightened Caleb up. "You might want to take it easy, Caleb. Even you have to admit you can't have had an easy time of it in here," Caduceus rubbed his shoulder, deciding on sending another healing pulse through Caleb's body.

That was the one that got rid of the last of the drugs.

He swallowed, things becoming much sharper around him. The absolute dissonance of seeing his friends in this room. How Beau was still taking photographs, or filming, or something. How Molly looked like he hadn't slept in a week. How he wasn’t even sure how long he’d been gone. How his arm was now filled with shooting pains, aching at his sides.

How badly he wanted to go home.

"Ja… Can we leave? I would like very much to not be here anymore." He didn't even care about how he got back to Nicodranas. Without his spellbook he was useless, only commanding fire and lights. Hell, he'd get in a car and take a five day drive there now if he had to.

Beau nodded, stashing her phone away. "The monks need to come in and do their… their investigation monk shit anyway. Let's get you out of here."

His heart lurched at the thought. Caleb hadn't hoped to think of going home before two minutes ago. To think of sinking back into his bed with Mollymauk. To think of having his family again.

Jester almost knocked him over with the force of her hug, reminding him how one of Ikithon’s staff had kicked him in the chest a few days prior. Caduceus might not have gotten the last of the bruised ribs. In fact, he was pretty sure the only thing holding him upright was the fact that Molly was still behind him, unwilling to let go.

“Caleb! Are you okay? Oh, man, you’re hurt, hold on-” Jester pulled back, taking stock of him then and seeing the grimace on his face, pumping him full of another surge of healing magic. The effect was heady, softening everything around him until he felt like he was wading through cotton.

He blinked away the strange feeling. “Danke, Jester. It’s good to see you. None of you are hurt? I don’t need to take up all your spells-”

“We’re fine, Caleb.” Yasha said, her massive greatsword out and on her shoulder as she patted his forearm and used her own healing on him too. He was starting to feel drunk on it, unsure if he could stand without the grounding pain. Exhaustion was creeping up on him instead, even as Veth came rushing towards him and hugged him around the middle. 

But he still noticed, “Yasha, whose blood is that?” There was the familiar sticky red substance dripping off the Magician’s Judge. He didn’t want to believe that the sword had lived up to its name.

A small smile with no real enjoyment crept onto her face. “Do you want to see him?”

Caduceus said, “Yasha, he needs to rest-”

Veth almost screamed, “He doesn’t ever have to see that bastard again-”

“Let him answer,” Yasha said, more intimidating than she ever directed at friends, looking at Caleb with burning eyes. Eyes that had watched Obann die before them. “Do you need to see him?”

Slowly, he reached a finger out and ran his finger through the red blood on the sword. A little smile that matched her own crept up on his face. No real joy, but satisfaction of a sort. He knew that the others didn’t understand. But Yasha always would. “Did you?”

“Come on,” she said, easily hooking her arm through the side not occupied by Molly.

“Wait!” Veth said, running up and catching Caleb before they left, holding out his book holsters and component pouch and helping him slip them back on. “I’ve been keeping them safe for you. No one’s even cracked them open.”

“You are an angel, Schatz,” he said softly, ignoring the pain a moment to pull her into the best hug he could manage. Which wasn’t great, with him still needing to cling to Molly for support, but it was something. With his books and his friends at his sides, he felt overwhelmingly whole.

Molly whispered in his ear, “Is this a good idea? You’ll be able to see him at the trial and everything.”

“I… I need to see him. You don’t have to come.”

His grip tightened on Caleb’s upper arm, away from the fresh scars. “You’re not going anywhere I can’t follow. At least for a few days. Or maybe weeks.”

Caleb wanted to lean over and kiss him, but he needed to see first. He needed to see it to believe it. 

And there he was, bloodied and in chains, getting loaded into a van that was covered in anti magic runes and protections, with more members of the Cobalt Soul than he’d ever seen surrounding him. He’d seen how quickly Beau could stun someone, and the likelihood of all of the monks failing to be quicker than Ikithon seemed to be quite unlikely.

It was really happening.

The old man caught his eye and spat, “After everything I’ve done for you… You know these binds won’t hold me forever, boy. You’ll pray for the kindness I’ve shown you in the past.”

Caleb looked down at him. He looked his age for once. He looked _weak,_ even when Caleb was the one pumped full of drugs and feeling worse than ever. “I do not pray. For you or anyone else.”

Turning back he was filled with gratitude for Yasha and Molly’s support as he moved back to his friends. He didn’t need to pray to gods who may or may not have forsaken him. He didn’t need to listen to Ikithon yelling behind him. He had everything he could ever need with them.


	86. Widogast's Nascent Nein-Sided Tower

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some well deserved fluff for the nein <3

### Chapter 86: Widogast’s Nascent Nein-Sided Tower

Molly had his arm around Caleb and, as far as he was concerned, he was never letting go. It just felt _right_ to have the wizard back, slotted against his side like a perfectly matching puzzle piece. He watched Caleb face Ikithon with no more fear and turn away from the man screaming for him to turn back alongside other obscenities. 

Together they were strong, and Molly thought he could walk on air.

In the van Beau and Fjord had rented for the trip, Caleb curled even closer to his side and pulled out his spellbook, reading over one page again and again. Caleb had summoned Frumpkin to purr in his lap along with the book and even though Fjord had already sneezed once, the half orc said nothing. Everyone was quiet except for Jester humming to the radio, and Veth had curled up on Caleb’s other side, claiming his free hand to hold. Beau and Yasha were talking softly about the events of the day in the row ahead of them, with Caduceus listening quietly, while Jester held the maps in her phone to help Fjord navigate. Molly wove his finger’s through Caleb’s hair as he read until he was dozing on Molly’s shoulder.

Their family was back together.

They’d explained how they needed to stick around for some more questioning by the Cobalt Soul tomorrow. Dairon had accepted that in trade for not taking Caleb to a hospital to get checked out. Like hell Molly was going to let some doctor scare the shit out of Caleb fresh out of that hell. One of the monks was trained as a healer and gave him a once over and another little surge of magical healing before clearing him to go home with a prescription of rest.

With the wizard asleep on his shoulder and doing just that, Molly finally felt like things were going right again.

As the van pulled to a stop in front of their crummy hotel, Caleb stirred, making a soft groaning sound. Molly reveled in the opportunity to lean down and kiss his forehead, then both eyelids before he managed to blink them open. “Let’s get you in a proper bed, yeah?”

“I’d like to talk to everyone first, if I could,” he said, voice rough from sleep and Molly wondered how it was possible to be falling deeper in love with the man beside him.

Molly helped him out of the van, “I think they’d all do just about anything for you right now, love.”

Despite the sleepiness still painting his face, Caleb flushed softly. “I like that.”

“Hm?” Molly asked, wrapping his arm back around Caleb’s waist as Frumpkin crawled up to his normal place as a purring scarf.

“Love,” he murmured, eyes blinking with the effort of staying awake. “I love you. It’s nice to say.”

Molly couldn’t help but to grin, kissing his temple as he opened up the door for them. “It is nice. I’ve been meaning to say it for ages, but I wanted you to feel safe.”

“I am safe. You make me feel safe.” Caleb’s eyes were still droopy, but they managed to get up to Molly’s room and usher everyone inside, even if Caleb almost started snoring in the elevator. Not that his wizard snored.

Molly sat Caleb on the edge of the bed and the others made themselves comfortable.

“So,” Jester started, “what’s up, Caleb?”

“Yeah, we totally get it if you don’t want to be alone, do you need us to camp out in here tonight?” Beau asked.

“Ah, nein, I just wanted to thank you all.”

“You don’t have to thank us, Caleb. We weren’t going to just leave you there,” Veth sat up on the side of the bed with him and patted his hand. The others quickly agreed with her.

Caleb just shook his head. “Lesser friends might have. But you are truly family, and the best I ever could have asked for. So, if you’ll allow me, I’d like to show my thanks.”

With that he tried to stand, startling Molly a moment before he stabilized him. “You don’t have to do anything tonight, Caleb.”

“I know. I’ve been meaning to do this for a while.” He started rifling through his component pouch for a small wand Molly recognized had been a birthday present from Calianna, a piece of stained glass, a piece of granite, and a small wooden cat statue. After giving Molly a quick peck on the cheek, he patted the supporting arm. “I think I can manage for a minute, ja?”

“I’m gonna count,” Molly mumbled, but begrudgingly let Caleb go. When he got to fifty nine, the air crackled with the familiar swirl of Caleb’s arcane force and they were all standing in front of a strange door.

Caleb stepped back, a look of pride on his face as he returned to Molly’s side. “This should be more comfortable than the hotel rooms. Not, that I’m not grateful, but I want to share this with you. I’ve been working on it for quite some time.”

“It’s a door? Where does it go?” Jester asked, looking curious but tired. 

“Open it and find out.” Caleb had a sparkle of mischief back in his eyes and Molly wanted to snap a picture of it or ask Jester to paint it for him. He wanted to hold it forever.

But he was too curious when he heard Jester gasping as she walked through the door, with Veth and Beau right at her heels. Caleb hung back and let all the others go in first before he moved to follow them with Molly’s support.

“If everyone would join me in the center of the room?” he asked, slipping past them as if the massive stained glass windows in this huge foyer were nothing to be interested in.

Caleb stood in the middle of the floor and said, “If you think ‘up,’ this will happen.” And he started to float away from Molly with a look of pride in his magic that was so intoxicating it took Molly a second to get the hang of it and float up to meet him.

“This is insane, you beautiful bastard,” he said softly, completely lost in the weightless feeling of floating up to the next floor with Caleb still wrapped up in his arms.

“That is just the beginning.”

The tour was quick, with everyone exhausted, but every room was completely breathtaking. When Molly saw the stained glass in the library that looked like his favorite coat he felt a tear roll down his cheek. He couldn’t stop grinning as Caleb directed around the spectral cats to bring food to each of their rooms, loving how he’d named every last one. Up, up, up, they floated, losing people on each floor as they slipped into their personalized rooms.

After Caleb was done showing Veth around her new alchemical laboratory, they floated up to the ninth floor, alone.

Excitement had been slowly building to overshadow Molly’s exhaustion at the space Caleb would have built for them to share in this strange, magic place.

When they finally got there, his jaw dropped. It looked like Caleb had raided every art museum in Exandria for the gaudiest tapestries he could find, then fought Howl Jenkins Pendragon personally for possession of all his trinkets and bobbles, after taking the crown jewels from every empire east of Tal’Dorei. Hidden amongst the clashing colors were snippets of things Caleb liked too, bookshelves and soft cozy chairs by the fireplace for reading, little dancing lights that looked like a combination of one of Caleb’s spells and Molly’s string lights, topped off with a cat tree that looked like something out of a fairytale, all covered in fabric that looked like moss and little mushrooms.

It was perfect.

Caleb was perfect.

Caleb was perfect and he’d built them an entire home made out of magic.

“You’re ridiculous and I love you,” Molly murmured, turning and kissing him on the nose with so much adoration in his heart he thought he might burst.

His responding grin nearly did it, Molly’s heart aching for the man in his arms. Caleb said, “I love you too. Ich liebe dich.”

Molly echoed in Infernal then started moving towards the bed. “C’mon, you should rest.”

“Ah, I think I need to clean up first,” Caleb said softly, looking at the dried blood still caked on his arms.

“Right, right,” Molly nodded, too exhausted and awed to think properly. He really didn’t want to think about that. Not right now. Washing it away as soon as possible sounded perfect. “I assume there’s a magic bathroom?”

“Yes. The door on the right there is a copy of our work room mostly, just a little bigger, and the left is a bathroom. I think you’ll like it.” Caleb moved them closer, Frumpkin taking his leave at the talk of water and going to explore his new cat tower. Without fail, Molly knew he would end up curled up against Caleb by the time they fell asleep, but it was just another adorable thing about him.

“I love everything so far. I can’t imagine not loving something you made,” Molly said, unable to stop even though the words were so sickly sweet they caused Caleb to flush almost immediately. He loved that too, kissing his pink cheeks. “C’mon. I’ll help.”

Molly opened the door expecting to find maybe a fancy version of their bathroom at home, maybe with a bigger shower and a bathtub. What he walked into was practically a spa. It wasn't minimalist and spread out like some, but filled to the brim with rich, purple towels that looked fluffier than anything, bundles of eucalyptus and lavender, and what looked like a Lush catalogues' worth of bath bombs and soaps. The same little floating lights lit the space, and there was another fireplace crackling away and keeping the slightly smaller room a few degrees warmer.

Molly didn’t think he would have been more shocked if an imp appeared and punched him in the stomach.

“Holy shit.”

“I walked through that store you like in the mall. I think the staff thought I was insane, smelling everything so I could memorize them all, but I hope it worked,” Caleb said, a nervous smile painted across his features as if this wasn’t the most amazing thing anyone had ever done.

Not kissing him was impossible. So Molly did, too tired to think about more, but just so ridiculously enamored with his wizard. “You’re the most talented, caring, and charming wizard ever to live and I adore you.”

His cheeks turned that soft pink again, but his protests were interrupted by a large yawn.

“C’mon,” Molly said, leading him to sit on the corner of what could technically be called a jacuzzi bath but was mostly just a hot tub. The tiles, which Molly was expecting to be cold, were warm to the touch, as if they’d been heated by the sun all day. “You really thought of everything, didn’t you?”

“I hope not. I’m expecting notes from everyone to make it better, for next time,” he said, smothering yet another yawn.

Molly raised a brow. “Already thinking about next time?”

“Maybe. I like seeing everyone happy. And this is a powerful spell, but it’s not hard for me. Just a minute and the right components.” Caleb lifted the hem of his hoodie, wincing at the strange angle from his forearms. After quickly abandoning the basket of bath bombs, Molly moved over to help, just having Caleb keep his arms up straight.

Rubbing his hands over Caleb’s stiff shoulders, Molly hummed. “Is it expensive? It would be nice if we could do this instead of hotels when we travel.”

“Just my strongest spell. I can’t do this and teleport without a circle. It would be very convenient for travel, ja.”

Molly stopped unbuttoning his shirt. “Wait, this is free? Like it doesn’t cost any more than the dancing lights?”

“It’s more difficult to cast, but you’re correct.”

“So if I saw a bath bomb I liked, I could just show it to you, and we could come back home and have a mansion full of them?” Molly asked, picking up one of the bombs and smelling it deeply.

Caleb nodded, carefully slipping off his bottoms and sinking into the hot water. “I can make you anything you like. It just can’t leave the mansion.” His eyes slipped closed as he leaned back on the bench under the water. Grabbing a folded up towel, Molly tapped his shoulder so he could slip it under his head.

His grip wasn’t really strong enough to pull Molly down, but Molly let Caleb guide him down anyway, kissing upside down with a lazy grin. “Pick one out and join me,” Caleb said, tracing one of Molly’s scars and sending him into shivers.

“You shouldn’t have given me so many choices,” Molly mumbled, moving back to the basket and discarding the rest of his clothes. He looked at the bath bombs, then back to the bath with Caleb resting his eyes again.

Caleb’s eyes fluttered open as Molly dropped ten of the little spheres inside with a grin then slipped inside to watch them fizz. “We’re going to smell like that store,” Caleb said in a voice that might have been a grumble if it hadn’t been so fond.

Molly only laughed and kissed his hair. He poured a little shampoo in his hand and began to massage the red waves. “You love me.”

Letting his head slip back as he leaned into Molly’s chest, Caleb let out a contented sound. Molly’s heart soared as he hummed and said quietly, “I do.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> just realized this monstrosity has surpassed 200k....... thanks to everyone who has stuck around; your comments & kudos give me a well needed serotonin boost each day <3


	87. Freedom

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Caleb tries to cope with the idea of Ikithon not being a threat.

### Chapter 87: Freedom

Caleb had known his friends would love the tower, but getting to watch their stunned faces as he showed them each to their personalized room almost felt like thanks enough for all the trouble he put them through. Somewhere inside him, he knew that their friendships weren’t transactional, but he wasn’t exactly thinking about that. That would take time to accept again.

For now at least, he could be happy that they were happy.

And was it a bad thing to see how much Yasha loved the flower mural inspired by one of Jester’s paintings? Or how excited Fjord was to see his room with the hammock? Or Veth with her trinkets or Caduceus with his exotic garden?

Beau’s room was rather simple compared to some, but it was nice enough and it connected to Yasha’s room. That and the mirror on the top of the bed was enough for her to be happy.

And Mollymauk.

Mollymauk seemed more than happy with the tower, and hadn’t let him go for more than a few minutes all day. It was lovely, and Caleb was almost reluctant to start feeling better if he could spend his whole life leaning into Molly’s warmth. But he was exhausted, and tomorrow would be a long day with a lot of difficult questions from the Cobalt Soul. 

The spectral cats brought them all their favorite takeout foods, and they didn’t even have to worry that much about crumbs since the bed would disappear tomorrow morning when he dispelled it. Frumpkin stayed on his shoulders while he ate pizza and talked with Molly, halfway to falling asleep with the slice still in his hands. While Molly ran his fingers through Caleb’s hair, it was getting harder and harder to keep his eyes open. He had texted Caduceus to ask about Molly’s tea, unsure if he could replicate something so enchanted without knowing the nature of the enchantment.

The firbolg was more than happy to come up, giving Molly his mug and wishing them both a good night.

In retrospect, Caleb probably should have asked for one as well. Caduceus even offered, but he just gestured to the hot cocoa he’d gotten a cat to make him. Exhaustion was creeping in like fog, and he was sure he would sleep.

And he did, but he dreamt too.

All of a sudden he opened his eyes and he was back in the cell, believing everything had been a cruel dream. Things were hazy and dream like, but that could have just been the drugs.

None of it had happened. He was alone.

There was no way to take down Ikithon, he should have known it was too good to be true.

He was back alone, with Frumpkin purring sadly in his lap.

There was no more warmth around his shoulders, just the cold stone leeching away what heat was left in his body. His forearms ached and he could see the blooms of blood under the bandages Astrid had wrapped him in.

He shouldn’t have been surprised, but he was still caught off guard by the surprisingly lovely dream. The tears began to stream down his face before he could stop them.

_Caleb._

Now that was truly cruel. If he began to hallucinate Molly’s voice, he was going to go insane.

_Cale, wake up, it’s just a bad dream._

_You’re safe. I’m right here._

The sentiment repeated in Zemnian, then Infernal, accompanied with a soft rubbing on his shoulders that definitely didn’t belong in this place. His eyes blinked open slowly, and he saw Mollymauk with a small halo of glowing dancing lights and wondered if he was truly blessed.

Maybe the gods hadn’t forsaken him after all.

“Hey,” Molly said softly, smiling a smile that was far too sad. Caleb wanted to make him smile a real smile, the kind that made the corners of his red eyes crinkle around the edges and made Caleb’s heart melt. “Is touching okay? I didn’t want to startle you, but you were crying in your sleep.”

He nodded, unsure if he had the words, but able to pull Molly closer.

“It’s real,” he murmured, nose buried in Molly’s purple curls that still smelled like that store in the mall where all the salespeople attempted to convince him to put his hands in foamy, fragrant water. It never smelled _bad,_ but he had no desire to touch the suds. “You’re really here.”

“I’m here. You’re safe, and I’m never letting you go. Not until you pry me off with a crowbar.”

Caleb nodded into the crook of his neck, trying to stop from trembling. His cheeks were still wet. So he’d been crying in real life too, as Molly had said. It wasn’t so much that he thought Molly would lie, just that everything was slow to come into focus after waking up.

Rubbing slow circles on his back, Molly helped, counting out breaths and then explaining the day's events again.

“We got you out of there. You’re safe and that bastard is in chains. He’s going to pay for what he did to you, and everyone else. He can’t hurt you or anyone else anymore. You’re in the tower, and we’re all here with you. I’m here.”

His words were low, methodical and soothing as Frumpkin purred against Caleb’s lap. After a time, his breathing slowed and he felt more sure of his surroundings. Pulling away from Molly he traced his fingers over the new scars on his forearms, fresher than the old ones, but with the healing magic they would be much less noticeable. Pressing in lightly he could feel the dull ache, the proof that it had happened and it was over.

Molly lifted his arm over and kissed one of the new scars. “You’re safe, and I’m not leaving you. Do you want anything? Can the cats bring you more cocoa?”

Caleb shook his head slowly, still taking it all in. “This is enough. Being with you. And not there.”

A wry smile curled at his lips. “Glad to know I’m preferable to a torture chamber, love.”

He managed a small chuckle, still just consumed in the feeling of being cradled to Molly’s chest, safe and loved. It felt unreal, but it was here and it was his.

Molly gingerly pulled them back so they were lying down, and Frumpkin moved up to purr like a motorboat on Caleb’s chest. With the unnaturally warm arms convincing him he was no longer asleep on a stone floor, he was able to curl closer and find more rest, blissfully dreamless. 

When he woke again he was stiff, but felt more awake than he had in days. The last of the drugs and magic had left his system completely and now he felt nothing but a dull ache in his arms. Mollymauk hadn’t woken yet, so he stayed still, tucking a loose purple curl behind his ear and thinking about breakfast. Once Molly had woken up, he would tell the cats to make a big spread, like a fancy hotel with a waffle and omelette bar, but for now he would stay in the almost too warm embrace.

He would have laid there forever, or at least until the mansion threatened to kick them back out into the material plane, but it was getting to be time for them to prepare for the questioning from the folks at the Cobalt Soul. Caleb very much wanted to have breakfast before doing so, even if he might feel nauseated while talking to them.

So he made a low whistle, trying to alert one of the cats without waking Molly just yet. For a few minutes more, they could lie in peace.

A little black and white tuxedo cat came out of the tube system and trotted over to the bed. “Ah, Fritz. Would you tell the kitchen to prepare a breakfast? An omelette bar, a waffle bar, all sorts of toppings for Jester, maybe a cereal bar for everyone who isn’t feeling like lots of food… French toast, cinnamon buns, hash browns, lots of bacon, sausages, perhaps some wurst like Vater used to make… And lots of fresh fruit. Oh, and tea and coffee for everyone. Make it just like they do at Divine Delights. And orange juice for Jester.”

Fritz meowed and nodded his head, darting back into the tunnel system.

As he talked, he heard Molly stirring, so he moved back to hold him tighter, hoping the pressure would help wake him in a way that wasn’t jarring.

“Cuddly this morning, are we?” Molly asked, voice deep and groggy from sleep as he ruffled Caleb’s hair and stretched as much as he could while being held.

Caleb moved back, starting to apologize before Molly dragged him back across the sheets and into his arms. “Didn’t say I didn’t like it,” he mumbled, a lazy grin on his face as he kissed Caleb’s nose. “Good morning.”

“Guten Morgen,” Caleb said, unable to keep from matching Molly’s smile.

Molly nuzzled into Caleb’s neck then, careful of his horns but still yawning into his collarbone. “Can you magically stop time so we can stay here forever?”

“I’ll work on that one. We might need to travel to Xhorhas.”

He nodded and pulled back, stretching and popping muscles and ligaments. Caleb may or may not have been staring at his shirtless chest as it flexed and twisted, just enamored with the fact that he could reach out and touch if he wanted. So he did.

Molly shivered under the touch as Caleb traced the familiar lines of scar tissue and tattoos. “As much as I love where this is going, I think we should probably get ready for the day in other ways, love.”

“Of course.” Caleb pulled his hand back and instinctively looked for his clothes. It took a moment to remember any clothing he summoned would be confined to the tower. “Ah, I don’t suppose you have clothes I could borrow?”

“I brought a bunch of extras. Let me go grab them. Maybe I can see if the hotel has room service too.”

“Breakfast is taken care of,” Caleb said with a grin, very much enjoying Molly’s curious expression.

Before long they were both wrapped up in Molly’s colorful clothes, though he had picked some more muted ones for Caleb, and they made their way down to the Salon. Caleb instructed a few of the bigger cats to help him set up the tables for breakfast, getting soft cushioned chairs around a big circular table for their friends to swarm around. 

Jester squealed about the vast selection of toppings to put onto waffles, and she started to put on more whipped cream and sprinkles than Caleb thought possible. But she seemed happy, along with everyone else, even though Beau wouldn’t be able to stuff her pockets with bacon before leaving the tower.

The group seemed to realize that they needed to keep the conversation light, just chatting about how much they loved the tower and distracting Caleb with tiny modifications here and there. It was a calm way to start what would likely be a stressful day, and he was grateful to sit and talk about magic for the time being.

“Alright, as awesome as this place is, we’ve gotta go meet the prosecutor at the Cobalt Reserve. Dairon will have my ass on a plate if I’m late again,” Beau said around a mouthful of bacon. “It sounds like the trial will be in about a month, so whoever doesn’t need to stay is free to head back home.”

Jester ran to Caleb’s side and hugged him, almost making him drop his fork. “Do you want us to stay? I bet mamma would give me enough money to stay in Rexxentrum for a month-”

“Stay?” Caleb blinked, looking up to Beau.

“Yeah, I mean we need to work on the case together pretty much every day here. I can probably make it so you only have to stay a few weeks, but they definitely need you.” Beau shifted in her seat. “Sorry, dude.”

“I’ll stay too. You won’t be alone. And we can stay in the tower each night, right?” Molly asked.

Caleb looked at his friends who were willing to stay for an entire month in this awful city, just for him. “You all don’t need to do that-”

“We want to stay and help you out. And this is like kind of my job,” Beau shrugged. “It'll suck not to see Yasha for a month, but I’ll deal. We can skype and shit.”

Yasha nodded beside her, patting her hand.

“No, I mean you literally do not need to-” he tried again, but was interrupted once more.

“Caleb,” Molly said, “you don’t have to do this alone. We want to be here for you.”

“I understand that,” he said, raising his voice just a hair in the hopes of getting a sentence out. “I’m not being self deprecating, I just mean to say that no one has to stay in this fucking awful city for a month, including me. I can just teleport us here and back each day.”

Beau lit up. “Oh shit, really? Me too?”

“Ja, of course. I’d rather not uproot any more lives than necessary for the sake of Ikithon. He deserves none of our suffering.”

“Cheers to that,” Veth mumbled, taking a sip from her flask.

Jester nodded enthusiastically, raising up her glass of juice. “Fuck that guy!”

There was a resounding echoing of that sentiment as people toasted with their tea or coffee. Beau nodded. “May he rot in the lowest ring of hell. Ready to go meet the prosecutor, Bryce, Caleb?”

He nodded, taking Molly’s hand. “Ja. Let’s go.”


	88. Preperation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They prepare for the trial, and Molly is just as bored by the whole thing as I would be.

### Chapter 88: Preparation

“My name is Bryce Feelid, they/them, and I’ll be the prosecutor for this case. Everyone, please come in, sit down, introduce yourselves.”

Molly came into the small room in the back of the Cobalt Reserve and sat down at the table covered in files that he assumed would hold all the information that they were telling Bryce, but it was nice to find someone who actually cared about pronouns. He pulled out a chair for Caleb and sat down beside him after pushing his own chair as close as possible. With his tail wrapped around his wizard’s ankle and their hands intertwined on the table top, it almost felt like enough.

Of course Caleb was on edge, he hadn’t expected him not to be, but it was almost as bad as when the poor man’s apartment had burned down. Every loud noise, every crowded space, every sudden movement and there was fear in his eyes. Molly just wanted to wrap him up in a blanket burrito and put the world on hold for him until he felt safer again.

Still, he introduced himself with no tremor in his voice and remembered to give his pronouns despite being incredibly distracted by the loud sounds of people settling into the room. Bryce explained how they had been approved to proceed with the trial based on how much evidence they’d had.

Agonizingly slowly, Bryce laid out every piece of evidence they had assembled with Dairon and Beau over the past couple of days in preparation. Caleb was seated right beside them, passing things back and forth between the prosecutor and the monks and telling them more information about everything they’d collected. They all asked about things like what the crystals were used for, how he and the other kids from Blumenthal were chosen, how Ikithon had abused his power in the past, and a million other things Molly was sure that Caleb didn’t actually want to dredge up.

He did look pleasantly surprised when it sounded like his old friends, Eadwulf and Astrid, would cooperate for reduced sentences. If they were able to help take down Ikithon, that was. Molly didn’t really like the look in their eyes, but the girl had almost immediately turned on her old master when they showed up. They were just “doing their jobs,” and they had been under the same magical manipulation as Caleb, but they weren’t like him.

Their eyes were colder and they _knew_ what they’d done, but it didn’t haunt them. Not that Molly thought Caleb _should_ be so tormented by his past, but the fact that they didn’t care at all frightened him. Especially since he would probably be tagging along to brunch with them at some point once Caleb was feeling up to it and they were off parole or whatever deal it was they’d be making.

He just hoped their eyes would have a bit more life in them by the time that all happened.

As the day progressed, it was becoming more and more clear that Molly was really only there for moral support. He was drained from the day before and never wanted to leave Caleb’s side, but he was genuinely bored out of his mind and thought he might go insane when Dairon proposed a working lunch. When Beau and Caleb agreed, he had to figure out something to do besides holding Caleb’s hand when things got stressful. As much as he loved being able to hold his wizard, Caleb was becoming calmer and more methodical as the work started to become more like research and less like reliving trauma.

Caleb was compartmentalizing well, and while that was a little terrifying, there wasn’t anything Molly could do about it right at this moment. He was quite glad that they weren’t staying the night in Rexxentrum. It was loud and probably quite fun under different circumstances, but Molly was so worried about Caleb being overwhelmed he was halfway there himself. He was also rather concerned with the rest of the members of the Cerberus Assembly, despite being reassured that every single one of them was a backstabbing bastard that would love to see Ikithon taken down a peg.

But he wasn’t sure if that extended to capital punishment, and that was certainly what he was hoping for.

Given how much backup they’d received to take down Ikithon, he wasn’t sure how they’d fare against one of its members alone. 

After their working lunch Molly managed to snag an empty notebook and begin drawing up designs for his own tarot cards. He’d been meaning to make a Moonweaver deck of his own for years, and he’d finally been inspired.

Who else but Caleb could be the Magician?

The first card of the deck, meaning a masculine force, full of talent and potential, determination, resourcefulness and skill. He drew the lines that would depict his wizard, holding Calianna’s wand with his coat and Frumpkin around his shoulders. The background he started putting down various magic symbols he’d seen Caleb use, putting them in a window behind him like the stained glass of the tower. With a ballpoint pen as his only instrument he couldn’t add any color to the sketch, but perhaps Caleb would be able to help him make cards that could actually glow.

He was mostly satisfied with the design about the time normal people would go home from a workday, but Molly was very aware that none of the people in this room were those kinds of people.

So he started designing the moon, making it an illustration of the Moonweaver and trying to make it match the stained glass look he’d done with the Magician. By the time he’d finished that one for the most part, thankfully, the others were packing things up for the day.

He’d ordered food online for them as soon as he saw Bryce closing up their manilla folders, far too eager to curl up back at home with Caleb. 

When he was able to eat Marquesian food straight out of the container on their couch with Frumpkin purring beside him as he leaned on Caleb’s shoulder and they started watching some cartoon Jester had recommended to them, Molly finally felt himself relax. He finished his food and leaned up to kiss Caleb’s cheek.

“I’m glad you’re back home,” he mumbled, nuzzling closer and grabbing a blanket to get cozy.

Caleb kissed his temple. “There is nowhere I'd rather be right now.”

“Well that’s lucky, ‘cause I’m never letting you leave again. You’re trapped here.” Molly accentuated his point by moving Caleb’s food and situating himself in the wizards lap.

Caleb just smiled down at him, playing with his curls as he put aside the rest of his food. Eyes slipping closed at the sensation, Molly had to hold back a yawn.

So quietly he almost missed it, Caleb said, “You don’t have to come tomorrow, if you don’t want to. I know it was very tedious.”

“I mean you all are dry as hell; I won’t argue that.” He sat up a bit more, cupping Caleb’s cheek. “But I’ll be there for you. So long as you don’t mind me drawing in the corner.”

He nodded, “I just want you to know you don’t have to.”

“In the tower, you said I made you feel safe. I know you were still kind of high and sleep deprived, but that’s all I want. If you’d feel safer with me there, and I’d feel safer keeping an eye on you, I think it’s perfect. Especially since apparently whenever we run out of grocery money we can go eat in your fancy tower. I might quit my job and become a cute housewife.” Molly winked up at him, enjoying the flush coming up on his cheeks.

Caleb cleared his throat a little, eyes darting away. “I think there’s a few more things that would need to happen before that could be a reality.”

“I know, I know. One thing at a time. But I might get one of those vintage dresses Jester always wears. I think I’d look good in the fluffy skirts.”

“You always look good, Liebling,” Caleb mumbled, cupping his cheek. The tender look on Caleb’s face almost melted his damn heart, but he kept talking before Molly could comment, “I won’t stop you if you’d like to keep coming along, but it won’t get more interesting.”

Molly smiled back up at him. “I don’t need interesting; I just need you.”

And so their days stretched on like that, waking up early, letting Beau in their apartment, and taking a teleportation circle to the Cobalt Reserve to meet up with Dairon and Bryce. Slowly, over the course of the next month, they built up every piece of evidence into a proper case that seemed as good as anything else they could have come up with. They painted the picture of Ikithon as the horrible man he was, and Caleb prepared Bryce for how the old bastard was able to twist words and logic whenever he spoke.

He’d be stripped of all his magics, but he was still a conniving asshole that Caleb was clearly still terrified of. Caleb was doing everything he could think of to give Bryce an edge, and that meant baring his soul and telling them everything that Ikithon had ever done. Each night they arrived home raw and fragile, indulging themselves with cuddling and comfort food. Things were going about as well as Molly had hoped, especially when Astrid and Eadwulf came in to talk about their time on the stand.

He saw life in their eyes at the thought of Ikithon being taken down, and they’d both looked quite friendly to Caleb. Even if they did accidentally call him Bren a few times. Molly eventually decided he wouldn’t really mind having brunch with them, so long as they could have a few mimosas and guarantee that Caleb had something to counter magic that day.

Bryce had asked if they could call Caleb ‘Bren’ when they were in court, so the jurors wouldn’t get quite as confused. Though he said he didn’t mind, Molly was still a bit worried. Sometimes he flinched when they said it, but he wanted to make the case as simple as possible. Ikithon was evil and deserved death.

They just had to convince a jury of their peers to believe the same.

Despite how boring it was, Molly showed up every day and kept his tail wrapped around Caleb’s leg. He designed almost an entire tarot deck in the notebook he’d stolen, with the major arcana all staring people he knew in real life. It was fun, and he was eager to see Ikithon locked up so he could get started on painting the cards he’d sketched.

The morning of the first day of the trial, Caleb looked like his hands were shaking so badly he’d never be able to tie his tie. Molly went over to help, very aware of how he’d chosen to dress more femininely today just to avoid the constriction of a tie in court.

“How are you feeling, love?” he asked, making sure the thing was loose enough for Caleb to breathe before hooking his finger into it so he could pull Caleb into a quick kiss.

He blushed gently, some of the nerves melting away. “Nervous. I feel like it won’t be as simple as we’ve been laying it out. I know he cannot cast, but he’s powerful and persuasive.”

“He hasn’t had access to a spellbook in over a month, babe. I think we’ll be able to take him, especially locked up in magic shackles.”

“He might have talked his way out of them. They do that sometimes, Bryce warned me, if they think that it would be a bad impression on the jurors.” Caleb was starting to look too worried again so Molly got on his tiptoes to kiss the furrow out of his brow.

Molly smoothed back Caleb’s hair from covering his eyes. “And when they said that, Beau and I shared a look with Dairon to make sure there’s no way in any ring of hell that he would get that. He’s dangerous and if the Cobalt Soul says so, he won’t be able to even cast a cantrip.”

“If something goes wrong,” Caleb said, taking a small, shaky breath, “would you be willing to teleport away with me? You’d need to stay within 10 feet of me for it to work-”

“Of course. I talked to Bryce and I can sit at the table with you. The front of the court is small because they’ve got that Zone of Truth enchantment on the whole damn thing. We should be fine.”

Caleb nodded, taking a deeper breath and reaching out for Molly’s hand. Their friends were on their way up, with everyone taking the day off to support Caleb at the trial. He repeated Molly’s words to himself, “We’ll be fine.”

“Of course. We’ll all be here for you,” Molly said, kissing him on the cheek as there was a knock on the door and the loud voices of Jester and Beau bickering about something in the hallway. “Ready?”

“As I’ll ever be.”


	89. Trial and Error

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ickythong's trial, part 1! (if anything seems too outlandish for a trial, just pretend it's part of the urban fantasy lmao)

### Chapter 89: Trial and Error

Caleb had measured the distance between the witness stand and the prosecution’s small table, and it was indeed within ten feet. Molly had gotten him special permission to have Frumpkin with him, and even registered him as an official emotional support animal, despite his being a familiar. While not happy with needing to wear his little vest, Frumpkin was understanding at least and eager to stay with Caleb instead of needing to hide away in his pocket dimension.

It felt like the scales were tipping in a way he could never repay Molly for yet again, but he’d had enough time with Pumat over the weekends to explore how Molly really seemed to want to help. He wasn’t forcing the tiefling to do anything. If he ever was without realizing, Molly was good at setting boundaries.

So he didn’t say anything about how he didn’t deserve it, he just said thank you. Molly looked pleased by that and had kissed his cheek.

He still felt all good relationships were built on a give and take, some kind of balance, but he would have years now to tip the scales back. And spending his life being grateful for this affection and devotion didn't sound that bad. Especially when it wasn't actually quantified as any sort of debt.

For now, he could let Molly hold his hand and have Frumpkin purr in his lap, under the table. Once Ikithon showed up he’d poof Frumpkin away. If those cruel, calculating eyes looked at him like they knew he was weak, he might end up sobbing at the witness stand. There was no way in hell he could let that happen. He had to remain coherent and eloquent and prove that he was completely sane.

That’s what it all came down to, his own word about how he wasn’t a danger to society that needed to be contained. There was little evidence against Ikithon about the death of his parents, despite the coincidence of all three of them revealing themselves to be traitors within a week of each other. It was his word, backed up by a few others, against Ikithon’s.

Needless to say, he was very grateful to have Frumpkin, even though he dispelled them the second he heard the clanking of chains.

Ikithon was brought into the room, sat down at the table mirroring the one Caleb, Bryce, Molly, and Beau sat at. Somewhere behind him sat Astrid and Wulf, denied of their spellbooks but still given the autonomy to walk in with no bindings and a simple escort. Caleb couldn’t help but to squeeze Molly’s hand. Perhaps they had some sort of failsafe in order. They were practically surrounded.

Could any of them have learned a strong enough spell to kill him on the spot? He was strong enough now to resist something like Power Word Kill, although just barely. He would be able to teleport today, but he also had a whole arsenal of combat spells prepared. Nervously, his hand not being gently rubbed by Molly’s was making the motion for a counterspell into his kneecap.

If Ikithon tried anything, he would burn. The tiny ball of bat guano and sulfur were right at the top of his component pouch.

Those were some screams he wouldn’t mind hearing.

"The area at the front of this court is enchanted so that one must tell the truth. If you resist the spell, you will be found in contempt of court and thrown out of my courtroom."

Caleb blinked, looking up at the half elven woman in robes who presided over them all. He’d been so jittery he missed the opening remarks.

It was time for Ikithon to take the stand.

Bryce was talking a bit, just asking some simple questions about how long he’d been training Volstrucker, when he took the kids in, what that training entailed, some small facts. The truth spell seemed to be working, but Ikithon seemed far too calm. Caleb didn’t know if that meant he had another plan in place or he was just hiding his own nerves as well.

“And last month, you broke into this man’s home and forced him to come with you to your home?”

"He was in an asylum under my care for 11 years. He's dangerous. To himself, to others. I watched him kill his parents. When I was there, it looked like he was trying to hurt that man, not me. I just wanted to keep everyone safe."

Molly muttered under his breath about being called a man, even when he was wearing a skirt today.

"I was doing everything in my power to get him back to Rexxentrum so he could get the help he needs. He needed someone familiar to convince him to come back home"

Caleb's stomach churned as Ikithon managed to lie even in the truth spell, twisting the facts and painting himself in a good light. He was going to walk free. Caleb had brought all his secrets to light for nothing. And now everyone in this room knew he'd killed his parents, knew that he was a horrible person, a garbage person-

Molly's hand readjusted and stopped Caleb’s from squeezing tightly before he could continue to spiral. There might be indents for a while, but he hadn’t drawn blood. This wasn't his fault. It was Ikithon’s fault, and that's why he was sitting here. 

The lawyer stopped him. "You're a very smart man, Trent, but I'm afraid you're talking in circles. You said it _looked_ like he was trying to hurt the tiefling. Did you actually believe that his life was in danger?"

"Yes," he said, looking a tad smug. Caleb could see it under the passive mask he’d been trained to adopt as well.

"From Bren?"

Ikithon was silent, the smug look faltering. The judge raised a brow. "Answer the question, Ikithon."

He remained silent.

Bryce looked to the jurors with a knowing look before they returned to their questioning. "So from yourself, perhaps? And if you were trying to get Bren the help he so desperately 'needs' as you say, where did you take him? The asylum? To a cleric or other healer?"

"I thought it best to take him somewhere familiar at first. He needed to reacclimate somewhere safe."

"Safe?" Bryce asked, clicking a button so a screen turned on near the jurors. "Is this what you call safe?"

"This is where we found Bren, drugged out of his mind with a residuum crystal still stuck in his arm." Images flashed on the screen of the room where Caleb was experimented on, alongside all the fresh marks Beau had photographed that ran along his old scars, and then a video, as Bryce listed the amounts of all the drugs that had been present in his system after he’d been healed and brought to a medic.

Caleb looked away as the video Beau had taken began to play, hearing his own voice and seeing the tweezers reach for the green crystal. He could hear the jurors gasp as they saw the blood streaming down both arms and his shaking hands removing the crystal on his own while he complained about splinters. It was a rather gorey picture, now that he thought about it. Beau’s video stopped as he almost fell over, Molly squeezing his hand gently to indicate it was over.

"Is that really your idea of 'safe,' Trent?"

It went on like that for a while, with Bryce slowly painting a picture of every horrible thing Ikithon had done over the past few decades with the Volstrucker and others. The defense attorny from the Cerberus Assembly was doing his best to build up Trent’s image, talking about all the good things the Volstrucker had been able to accomplish, but the jurors didn’t look like they were willing to forgive the torture of children for the perfect assassins like the king did once.

It looked like it was working, and Caleb was getting more and more nervous by it all by the second.

Astrid took the stand after Wulf corroborated Caleb’s story and was promptly painted as a terrible human being by the defense. After going through the same questions they asked Wulf, Bryce moved on to ask more about Ikithon.

“When Bren suffered his psychotic break, Master Ikithon was pleased. He didn’t help us to bring Bren to the Vergesson Sanitorium.” She moved the collar of her blouse to show the burn mark along her neck. “He also denied us healing, to show our failures to the rest of the world. But he didn’t stop tormenting Bren. Bren had always been the favorite, and he continued the experiments, the torture, even when he couldn’t think straight.”

Astrid shifted in her seat, clearly saying a well rehearsed story she’d come up with together with Bryce. “After eleven years, he brought in a healing woman to take Bren’s false memories away, hoping it would help to clarify everything and create the strong apprentice he always wanted. Bren, understandably, was terrified and escaped.”

Bren, no Caleb, could see Ikithon whispering angrily in the defense attorney's ear. He swallowed. He’d killed a man to escape, but he hoped that would be seen as self defense. Clearly though, Ikithon wasn’t expecting Astrid or Wulf to speak like this. The man had been stewing in anger from across the room ever since Wulf began to speak.

“He left the Empire and we didn’t hear from him again. I believe he was terrified that Ikithon would kill him, or throw him back in the asylum.” She swallowed, a slight grimace forming on her face. “When we heard nothing from him after a few years, Master Ikithon began to grow impatient. He knew we couldn’t scry on Bren because of his magical wards, but he’d hoped to hear of a red headed wizard with a preternatural skill for fire rising to power somewhere in the Empire or other parts of the world.

“When he heard nothing, he started to slip. He’d always ruled over the Volstrucker as an impartial force, vicious when necessary. But Bren, he’d been training him to take over his position formally as the Archmage of Civil Influence, and informally as the one to continue to train the Volstrucker. Ikithon was driven half mad looking for him for years.

“He wasted time sending Volstrucker on useless missions, telling them to keep an eye out for Bren. All his skills for strategy suffered, and his ambitions and plans for power stalled. He’d been attempting to cause discontent between the Empire and Xhorhas, to steal the secrets of their dunamantic powers, but those plans were completely thrown away as he started to search for Bren obsessively.

“I found Bren from a social media page, but I didn’t tell Ikithon. He looked happy. He’d created a life for himself, in Nicodranas. In all honesty, I hoped Ikithon would go completely mad so I could take over and stop the barbarous acts of the training Volstrucker myself. I misdirected the Volstrucker he sent to Nicodranas for that reason.”

Caleb stared into the face of the woman he thought he’d loved so many years ago. For all her terrifying ambition, she did care for him. So long as he didn’t interfere with his own plans.

From the witness stand she offered him a small smile, then looked to Ikithon and immediately threw the impassive mask they all wore back on. He didn’t have to look; he could feel Ikithon’s rage from where he sat.

Caleb looked on as the defense attorney tore down Astrid’s character with scathing records of everything she’d done under Ikithon’s control. She took it well, even as he himself winced at some of the more terrible things they’d done. Many of them together. He wished he didn’t feel weak when he relied on Frumpkin for comfort. He wished he could hold Molly’s hand on the witness stand. Ikithon knew intimately almost every terrible thing he’d ever done.

And all too soon she was done.

“Bren Aldric Ermendrud, please take the stand.”


	90. The Dead Mage

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Did I recreate my favorite bar in my favorite city to cope with being stuck at home? Maybe.

### Chapter 90: The Dead Mage

Molly didn’t really see it all happen. 

He was busy watching the defense attorney rip into Caleb with enough venom that Molly had been planning his death a million times over as he glared daggers. From questioning Caleb’s sanity, to his time at the Sanatorium, to dredging up all the deaths he caused at Ikithon’s behest, Caleb looked like he was going to cry at any moment behind his mask. But at the stand, Caleb had transformed back into the emotionless husk Molly had seen him embody with Ikithon, except today he could see that the wizard’s hands were shaking. 

Molly wished he’d brought some kind of stress ball or fidget too, since Caleb seemed to not want Frumpkin in front of other people. He should have thought of that. Especially since Caleb was still terrified when someone looked like they might hurt Frumpkin, even though he almost always had enough incense and herbs on him now. Tomorrow he’d bring something else for Caleb to fidget with. Something tiny that he could hide behind the stand.

Molly also wished the human from the Cerberus Assembly would spontaneously combust. Or start choking on his own tongue. Anything to make him shut the fuck up. He could feel Beau’s anger radiating from beside him as well. If it wouldn’t make the sniveling human man’s eyes bleed he’d be cursing him out in Infernal under his breath.

But he was effectively pissed off and quite distracted.

And it seemed like Caleb was too, until the strange feeling of arcane power reverberated around the room. Many spells were cast all at once, and Molly’s head whipped around as he tried to follow what was going on. First someone had coughed, covering up their spell, and dispelled the enchantment off of Ikithon’s chains. Molly heard familiar arcane words for teleportation being spoken by the archmage and felt his anger boil over, already standing up and ready for a fight.

He could see Caleb out of the corner of his eye, frozen, and someone in the crowd staring directly at his wizard, holding the piece of iron Molly knew was meant to cause paralysis. Caleb couldn’t counter the spell Ikithon was about to cast. The bastard was going to teleport away and they’d have no idea where to find him.

But Astrid just stood from her place in the crowd, and waved her hand. The crackle of magical energy that had filled the room began to fade. Eadwulf moved to dispel the hold on Caleb, and the rest of the room erupted into chaos.

Beau was already in front of Ikithon with Veth and Yasha at her heels, the monk hitting enough of his pressure points for him to collapse onto the table, stunned. The other monks who were supposed to be making sure Astrid and Eadwulf didn’t try anything were trying to find the mage who had dispelled the enchantment on the manacles. Molly saw someone sneaking out of the room at the same time as Caduceus did, with the elven woman in question suddenly blinded by Molly’s blood curse and caught in a sphere of silence from Cad where she could no longer teleport away.

There were about four or five other mages in the audience that suddenly looked more panicked than the rest of the people who had come to watch the trial, and vanished from their seats.

Iktihon’s backup had abandoned him.

He clearly hadn’t accounted for Astrid and Eadwulf choosing Caleb over him.

His ideas of his student’s loyalties had shattered as soon as one of them had proven they could fight back.

Molly was still a little worried with Eadwulf being so close to Caleb, but his wizard looked like he was finally starting to relax as Ikithon was put into new magical shackles alongside the two who had started the ordeal. He might have gone over to make sure the bastard tasted his sword again if he tried anything, but he could see Fjord making the same symbol Caleb had earlier, just idly, that Molly had come to recognize as countering spells.

After that, the defense attorney asked for a quick recess to strategize with his client, which he was granted and allowed to leave. Well, so long as they were escorted by almost every monk in the Cobalt Soul and the dragonborn bailiff who guaranteed the judge that he had measures for countering spells himself.

Bryce had a gleam in their eye from the whole thing, very optimistic about their new situation. Ikithon might as well have gotten up on the stand and professed his guilt. He’d killed the families of all of his students and apprentices, attempting to leave them loyal only to him, and instead dug his own grave. At the first real chance for a shift in power, they’d left him in the dust.

“So, we could go back to the Cobalt Soul and talk about what a fucking shit show that was, or we could go celebrate that shit show with a drink,” Bryce said, grinning as soon as Ikithon was gone and the rest of the Might Nein had gathered to the side.

Beau grinned, elbowing Dairon. “Hells yeah- Dairon, come have a drink with us!”

“I’m not sure I’m really one for the night life here in Rexxentrum,” Dairon said, looking like the last thing they wanted to do was go to a crowded bar in the city.

But Bryce just shook their head, “I know a small place; it won’t be too crowded on a Grissen afternoon. Come have one drink with us. It would be ridiculous not to celebrate a slip up like that.”

Dairon sighed, looking at Caleb. He’d relaxed some, Molly had noticed, but he still seemed on edge. “Perhaps. If it’s not too crowded a drink would soothe the nerves.”

Bryce nodded then gently patted Caleb on the shoulder. “I think it’s a place you’ll like too.”

Looking around at everyone, Caleb nodded. “I think a drink could be good, ja.”

Beau and Veth cheered. With that, Molly took Caleb’s arm and whispered to remind him about Frumpkin. He nodded again and poofed the cat back into his arms as the bengal gave a plaintive meow about the vest. Molly kept their arms hooked together.

“You sure you want to go out? I’m sure a monk could teleport everyone home if you want to bamf out and relax at home,” he said softly, unsure if Caleb would really do well in public at all right now, crowded venue or otherwise.

But the man just shrugged. “I’m feeling… a bit wired. A drink might help. And I can’t think of another group of people that would make me feel safer.”

“Damn straight,” Beau grinned, punching Caleb’s shoulder.

“If anyone comes too close to you, just let me know,” Veth said, holding up a nasty looking dagger.

Caleb chuckled and ruffled her hair with his free hand. “Of course, Schatz.”

Molly smiled softly at all their friends and leaned over to kiss Caleb on the cheek as they made the short walk to the bar.

The bar Bryce was taking them too was an old fashioned Zemnian pub called _The Dead Mage,_ and all the drinks were named after old dead arcanists. Beside Molly, Caleb seemed to perk up just at the sight of the place, looking at the exposed brick and little chalk circles drawn across them. He started pointing out the wards to Molly as they walked through, squeezing past the cramped space and taking up almost the entire back of the hole in the wall bar with their large party.

“That one is for good luck, and that one is a general protection ward. Oh, and this one is to make people of a stronger constitution. Probably helps them avoid people losing their lunches,” he said, fingers ghosting over the glyphs and sigils.

They sat at a high topped table in the back, with the others pushing almost every table in the joint together to join them. The menus were bound to look like spellbooks but inside listed just about every alcohol under the sun, along with their special arcane inspired cocktails.

Molly hopped down to get himself a Halas Lutagran, which proclaimed to be mostly vodka with a hint of citrus, but somehow was swirling and black like they’d captured necromantic energy in the drink. Much less adventurous, Caleb asked him to grab whatever beer they had on tap up front.

Jester went with him, grabbing some kind of red wine for Beau, sodas for herself and Caduceus, and something that looked more like green poison than alcohol called the Raishan for Yasha. Behind them tailed Fjord, who had offered to get Bryce and Darion something, both opting for one that looked gin based called the Delilah Briarwood. It swirled with some red juice and had a cranberry garnish. Perhaps Molly would try that one next. Fjord grabbed the same beer as Caleb did after deciding against something called the Opash that sounded like it might knock him on his ass.

The three of them waited and ferried drinks back and forth while Jester chatted with the bartenders, eventually getting convinced to get a ridiculous amount of garlic fries for the table. Though it was nowhere near dinner time, lunch had been a while ago and the cleric didn’t want anyone drinking on an empty stomach.

Yasha ate a handful of fries and moaned so loudly Beau turned bright red despite her deeply tanned skin, and Molly cackled. The fries were practically orgasmic, especially while tipsy, and Caleb was calming down extensively at his side, one hand petting Frumpkin and the other on his beer. He was explaining the histories of each of the mages their drinks were named after, mostly to Molly and Veth, but occasionally Fjord or Beau would chime in with a fact that they knew about one of them.

It was relaxed and fun, and Molly felt like he could float away. His tail was firmly wrapped around Caleb’s ankle, tethering him to the ground so he couldn’t, but his second drink (a Vespin Chloras that was bright orange and mostly tequila) kept him lightheaded and happy.

“Oh my gosh, _Molly!”_ Jester exclaimed as she was setting down a round of waters for everyone with Caduceus.

He blinked, wondering if he had a piece of garlic stuck to his face or something, “Yes?”

“They have a jukebox! Come help me pick a song!” she said, jumping up and down in excitement and grabbing his hand to drag him over. It was barely three feet from the table, and Molly wasn’t sure how she’d missed it, but he wasn’t going to ruin her good mood.

They scrolled through songs and set up a soundtrack for the evening, picking songs it was easy to sing along to even when plastered. He talked her out of a lot of the pop songs they would have loved just because he wanted Caleb to know all the songs too. And knowing them because Jester overplayed them in the café didn’t count. Molly got back in his seat and pushed it close enough to Caleb that he was practically fighting Frumpkin for space in the man’s lap. He just used that as an excuse to get closer, serenading the cat with a wonderful rendition of _Come on, Eileen._ Beau and Jester were singing along too, the human drunk enough to have fun with it and the sober blue tiefling happy as ever.

As the song ended and Molly landed on Caleb’s shoulder, he relished in the feeling of Caleb beginning to play with his hair as he hummed along to _Mr. Blue Sky._ His wizard coaxed him into drinking the entire glass of water that Caduceus had placed before him, and he was lulled into a near stupor with the intoxicating feeling of Caleb’s fingers in his hair alongside the literal intoxication. Those necromancers were brutal.

Before long Veth was yawning and everyone was eager to head home. Even Jester was part way to losing her voice from singing along to all the songs they'd picked. Caleb sent a message to Wensforth and started to lead them all out of the bar so he could draw the circle. Molly didn’t mention how it was probably safe for him to use his one teleportation spell of the day. It was likely that Caleb would feel safer with it still at his disposal, even all the way in Nicodranas. No one else did either, just walking out past the bar and waving to the bartenders who they’d been chatting with on and off all night.

Jester grinned at the bartenders who she was now calling close friends and said, “We’ll come back when you have Ikithon on the menu!”


	91. Punishment

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Caleb is waiting for.... something.

### Chapter 91: Punishment

Caleb was waiting.

Bren was waiting.

Something had to happen, he was sure of it. Even as Astrid assured him in whispers that she’d communicated with the other Volstrucker, who had definitely abandoned him, he waited. Even as Wulf leaned over to assure that his familiar had been trailing him as a spider, watching and revealing they had nothing, that Ikithon was as mad as they said, he waited. Even as Ikithon was walked into the courtroom again the next day looking more dejected, more _broken,_ than he had ever seen, he waited.

Even as Bryce, Molly, Beau, and Dairon got more and more excited, he waited.

Even as the jurors spoke of Ikithon’s guilt, he waited.

Even as the judge proclaimed capital punishment, he waited.

Even as Ikithon was dragged out of the courtroom, screaming every horrible obscenity he’d ever heard, he waited. He winced as he heard the incantations meant to cause him crippling pain, but as they held no effect he merely waited. Ikithon’s curses devolved into more furious ones intent to destroy him and his body.

But they had no effect.

Still, he waited.

It couldn’t be over. The other shoe had to drop eventually.

He felt as though he should have been relieved, that he should have felt some sort of weight lifted as he watched Ikithon get carted off, more genuine madness in the old man’s eyes than he ever thought he’d see. It made no sense.

Bren was supposed to be the broken one.

“Caleb?”

Molly’s voice seemed very far away as he watched Ikithon’s pale blue-gray eyes trained on him. Fury burned within them, more than he’d ever seen outside a mirror.

“Bren. It’s over.”

The door shut on Ikithon’s face and he was able to look up at Astrid instead, standing before the table he was frozen behind.

He swallowed, watching her face and wanting to ask why she never healed the burns he gave her. Why she’d let him hurt her. She hadn’t wanted to hurt him, despite how they were both monsters.

But he didn’t ask any of his burning questions. He extinguished the flames and started to close that chapter of his life, or at least to attempt to.

“Astrid. It’s Caleb,” he said softly.

Beside him, he could feel Mollymauk squeeze his hand a bit tighter. Willing up the strength to move something besides the whirring thoughts in his mind, he squeezed back.

A small smile that felt like a ghost of the girl he’d known twisted up the corners of Astrid’s lips. “Caleb Widogast. We’re finally free. And if anything about that changes,” her eyes flashed with an arcane glow to check in on Ikithon with her familiar, “this time, we will be at your side.”

Wulf nodded, his hand on Astrid’s shoulder.

Somewhere across the room, Caleb heard Veth saying something along the lines of, “Too little, too late.”

If he was feeling less like the world around him might crumble to ash at any moment, he might have shot her a look. She wasn’t _wrong,_ and she had been there for him unlike they ever had. Veth had earned the right to say her piece.

“You are watching?” he asked.

Astrid’s eyes flashed again. “I think he is truly abandoned. And far more mad than I’d realized. When the others stood up against him, something inside him snapped.”

Caleb knew very well what it felt like to snap, though how their old master had heard the screams of thousands and felt nothing he would never understand.

“And I can trust you,” he said, a statement that was really a question.

She smiled, “You know me, Bre-” then stopped herself. “Caleb. You know me, despite the years. This will be beneficial to us both. You can trust me.”

Wulf nodded again beside them, and Caleb saw a glimpse of his old friends. All three of them together were tired, eager, but just as nervous as the next. Hopefully the whole group of Volstrucker that had abandoned Trent would feel the same. With a whole bunch of trained assassins intent on the old bastard’s death, they could do it.

The monks who were keeping an eye on Astrid and Wulf cleared their throats, taking them back into custody before their own trials.

“Head home, guys, I’ve gotta finish some stuff up back at the Reserve. But congrats, Caleb,” Beau said, clapping him on the shoulder. 

He nodded, hoping the movement wasn’t as still as it felt. “You don’t need to come back with us?”

“Yeah, I found someone who can send me home when I’m done. They’ve got a few people of their own who can teleport; it’s kinda why they have the circle in their basement.”

“Of course,” Caleb said, watching her gather up her things with Dairon and Bryce, who both congratulated him as well.

It felt surreal as he walked out of the courtroom with Molly’s arm wrapped around his waist and Frumpkin around his neck. Astrid’s words echoed in his mind, _It’s over._

While it certainly felt like something important had happened, it didn’t quite feel like it was over either. Caleb was still waiting for the other shoe to drop, for this to be some part of an intricate plan against him and all his friends. Perhaps it was over, but his heart didn’t race any less.

“You’ve been quiet,” Molly said softly, rubbing circles in his hip.

Caleb turned and looked into the ruby red eyes that hid everything and nothing at once. “It has been a long day.”

“Can I help?” he asked, cocking his head and leaning over carefully to boop his nose against a curious Frumpkin.

Cracking a small smile, Caleb shrugged. “I think I’ll feel better with time. When it seems more real, ja?”

“When he’s dead, you mean?”

He nodded, about to agree with a light chuckle, when he heard someone clearing their throat, walking towards them out of the bathroom across from the courtroom. Caleb didn’t know her, but she was walking towards them with great purpose and a strange look on her face.

“Do you know her?” Caleb whispered in Molly’s ear, leaning a bit closer.

The elven woman was staring at Molly with thinly veiled hatred. He clearly had no idea who the hell she was, based on the look on his face, but she knew Molly. And that was a big problem.

But she quickly turned her glance to Caleb, smiling broadly and adjusting her long robes around her neck and pulling on gloves. “Ah, Mr. Ermendrud, congratulations on a very favorable outcome to the trial. I’m Vess DeRogna, I’m not sure if we ever got to be formally introduced back in the day,” she said, voice dripping with all the sickly sweetness and grace of a trained liar and politician.

“I don’t believe we did. You were typically away from the Academy while I was there,” he said carefully, nodding in respect but eyeing her very warily.

She smiled, “Unfortunate. I’ve heard wonderful things. We’re all quite pleased about the trial’s outcome; you needn’t worry about the rest of the Assembly. Someone has needed to weed out Trent for decades.”

“Thank you,” he said, a bit curt, making a half step turn to leave.

DaRogna kept speaking, turning to Mollymauk, “Lucien was it? I’m not sure we’ve been properly introduced.”

Molly stiffened like a board at his side and Caleb was grateful he’d spent the past few days remaining emotionless under horrible stress. He didn’t even flinch.

“Clearly you haven’t. I don’t know a Lucien,” Caleb said, trying to cut her off. He felt no need to be kind to anyone at the Assembly. They were all complicit in everything Ikithon had ever done, as far as he was concerned. “And I am sorry, but we were just leaving. Very nice to see you again, Archmage DeRogna.”

“Of course, I won’t keep you, Mr. Ermendrud, and it was nice to know you briefly…” she trailed off, inviting Molly to finish and offer up his name.

“Tealeaf,” he said, not bothering to shake her extended hand, though Caleb wasn’t sure if Molly just didn’t want to let go of his waist, or not wanting to touch her.

Whatever it was, he seemed grateful when Caleb turned and pulled him out into the night air, walking quickly down and around the corner. “Are you alright?” Caleb asked, turning to him and tucking a curl back behind his ear.

Though it looked like he was trying to answer the question, Molly seemed to be spiraling. Caleb did the best he could to comfort Molly, rubbing his cheek gently. In the end Molly didn’t answer his question and just asked, “Can… Can we go home?”

Caleb held up one of Molly’s charms in his fingers just to hear it jingle, and spoke the incantation. They were surrounded by the bright colors of Molly’s tapestries, and Caleb stepped forward to surround Molly in his arms as well. “You’re alright. You’re safe with me. Here,” he pulled back, taking off his necklace and fastening it around Molly’s neck.

“But this is yours-”

He smiled, brushing more of the curls out of Molly’s face so he could lean up and kiss his forehead. “And you’re the reason I don’t need it anymore. No one knows where we came from, not really. You’re safe. And I’m not scared of DeRogna.” The only person he was truly afraid of was behind bars and would be dead soon. 

Molly nodded, taking a deep breath. “Yeah. Yeah, no need to be afraid. I can just trade off and we can hide from another crazy wizard.”

“Well, if you’d like to hide, we can do it better than this even. Until we figure this out, ja?” Caleb asked, trying to smooth the wrinkle from Molly’s brow. “Go grab your sword, and I’ll summon up the tower.”

“You think I was in the same room as Icky Thong without my sword?” Molly asked, half smothered by Caleb’s coat. 

He laughed softly at that. “Then just wait one minute, okay?”

Pulling away, Caleb started the incantations for the tower. If they were really hiding, they might as well do it properly. It took time to scry, and DeRogna had been in a public place. She wouldn’t get any discerning details from their bedroom either. Caleb had been very careful not to leave so much as a postcard of the Nicodranas coast.

Molly was at his side as he cast the spell, and he could feel the nervous energy he’d had about Ikithon melting away. This was something he was good at. He could protect people. 

Inside the tower, Mollymauk finally relaxed again, knowing at least if they were going to be ambushed they’d tumble outside the tower with all their belongings at their feet. Caleb was very confident in his abilities to counter a mage so long as it wasn’t Ikithon.

“Would you like to talk about it?” Caleb asked after leading Molly upstairs to their massive nest of a bed in the tower. The cats would bring them comfort food and Caduceus’s special tea for Molly shortly so for now, they could just strip down to boxers and curl into the pile of pillows and blankets.

Molly curled into his chest, careful of his horns, and wrapped his tail tightly around Caleb’s lower thigh, close as possible. “I… Not really. I knew whoever had this body before was a fucked up asshole. It was probably just that. It’s not a face you forget. I just don’t like dealing with whatever bullshit it was he did.”

“We don’t have to talk about it. It’s over. I’d like to go back for the execution, just in case. But if you never wanted to go to Rexxentrum again after that, I’d be more than happy,” Caleb said, rubbing circles in Molly’s back and letting his eyes slip closed. He was very comfortable. “Once you attune to that necklace, she’ll never be able to find you with magic. We just won’t fuck up like I did with Ikithon, and assume she isn’t as crazy to go running after you. She always seemed fine, if a bit weird.”

“Right. How can you know for sure?” Molly asked, voice small.

He hummed, thinking. “I’ll ask around, see if she’s ever worked with purple tieflings, or if she just got in a row with whoever was in your body before. Astrid will know her better than I ever did. Wulf too.”

“Do you really trust them?”

Caleb sighed, mulling over the question again. “I want to, but I think that would be foolish for now. But if things are good for all of us, and Ikithon is dust, I think they have very little reason to lie. Not to mention I’m almost as hard as Caduceus to lie to.”

“I like it when you brag,” Molly said, a little smile twisting on his lips. “It’s hot.”

If it had been any other night, Caleb might have blushed. But he did feel powerful tonight. He felt like he could protect Molly and catch anyone who wanted to cause them harm. So he just pressed a chaste kiss to Molly’s lips and said, “I’ll try to do it more often then.”

“Good. You’re wonderful and powerful and being with you makes me feel safe. You should notice it yourself sometimes too.” Molly smiled a real grin then, chasing his lips until the cats burst in. They carried mac and cheese for Molly and a chicken pot pie just like Caleb’s mother made for himself. If for nothing else, the tower was wonderful for food.

It wasn’t long before they were comfortably full and exhausted, curling up to go to sleep. Caleb rested in the crook of Molly’s bare shoulder, tracing along the lines of peacock feathers and flowers to slow the thoughts in his head. His necklace lay nestled where Molly’s collarbones dipped, shining softly in the dancing lights that floated around the room like fireflies.

He rather liked the look of Molly in his necklace. Someday, Caleb would have to give him more jewelry. Once he figured out everything to do with Molly’s past, maybe he’d get him a ring.


	92. It's Over

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The end of an era.

### Chapter 92: It’s Over

If Molly learned anything from the events leading up to and including Ikithon’s trial, it was not to underestimate mages. For all the times he’d stepped in front of Caleb during battle, trying to keep the man he loved safe, the wizard could be terrifying. He’d heard from Beau that if they were going to choose capital punishment, they brought in a bunch of other mages to disintegrate the body after it was put to sleep. They didn’t trust the strong archmages not to have fail safes in place.

Knowing that some other powerful archmage somehow had a vendetta against whoever previously occupied his body?

Molly wasn’t a fan.

He did feel safer beside Caleb, especially after his stomach was full from magical mac and cheese that somehow just tasted better knowing that it was carefully crafted just for him based on Caleb’s memory. There was also the fact that they both seemed to be getting stronger every day. His blood magic was getting stronger as he trained, and Caleb had just gotten strong enough to teleport twice a day or to cast the tower and teleport in one day.

Soon, Caleb would probably be able to change the fabric of the universe forever and not bat an eye. Now that Ikithon was almost out of the picture, he could see some of the tension leaving his wizard’s shoulders. By the end of the year, Caleb would be less like a caged bird and more like a soaring phoenix.

Any stronger and he’d get close to those humans that thought they could fight gods way back when. Molly wasn’t sure of the specifics, but he’d heard Caleb talking about it back at _The Dead Mage._ Regardless, surrounded by their magic tower and Caleb’s arms, marked by the fury of another archmage, Molly felt safe enough.

It probably wasn’t _that_ bad.

It would probably all blow over, and Molly could go back to ignoring his past and relishing how happy Caleb was.

So he let Caleb chatter about everything and nothing, distracting him while they ate. Together they curled up in their bed that was just a little bigger than Molly’s, with a few more blankets and pillows. Molly had been glad to see it so unchanged; it meant Caleb really loved the space they shared, even with all the power in the world dancing on his magical fingertips.

Caleb’s eyelids looked heavy and he just curled up with Molly’s arm around him. Beginning to trace Molly’s tattoos, he fell quiet and seemed close enough to sleep that Molly didn’t try to speak with him. It wasn’t long before the small tickling sensation slowed minutely, showing that Caleb was beginning to nod off.

He smiled softly as Caleb’s fingers grazed the necklace he’d given him. The pendant was cool and grounding against his flesh now that he’d taken his shirt off. In all the time he’d known him, Caleb had never taken it off. It was like a part of him, an extension of himself that remained present even in the pool or the shower.

And now it rested at the hollow of Molly’s throat, something of Caleb’s given expressly to keep him safe.

He had never felt so loved.

Gently, Molly leaned down and kissed the crown of Caleb’s head, still scrolling through instagram with his free hand. He hummed at the little gesture, pulling himself even closer. Molly’s mind was racing, but soon Caduceus’s tea should kick in and he would find blissful, dreamless sleep. There was no need to disturb Caleb as he began to drift.

His phone buzzed and Caleb made a soft hum at the sound. Molly quickly turned the vibrations off and set his alarm for the morning while he was at it, then checked his texts.

Beau had texted the group chat as Molly was scrolling, talking about the results of the trial and telling everyone to congratulate Caleb. The Dwendalian Empire did not dawdle in manners of powerful, treacherous wizards that could threaten the tenuous peace between their allies. Trent Ikithon was sentenced to capital punishment and the execution was ordered by King Dwendal himself to take place in just a week.

Molly looked down to tell Caleb the good news and found the man fast asleep on his chest, hand halfway through tracing his tattoos. Not wanting to wake him, Molly typed out a reply with one hand.

> **Molly:** Caleb just fell asleep but we should definitely do something to celebrate  
>  **Molly:** Sugggestions??
> 
> **Jester:** We should throw a party!!!
> 
> **Veth:** we basically have a party every week at movie night
> 
> **Fjord:** True.
> 
> **Molly:** Veth’s right  
>  **Molly:** We should do something really speciak  
>  **Molly:** *special
> 
> **Jester:** a bigger party?
> 
> **Beau:** oh shit  
>  **Beau:** HUPPERDOOK
> 
> **Veth:** wtf is a hupperdook
> 
> **Jester:** Sounds cute!! Like a town of mushroom people!!
> 
> **Fjord:** I’m pretty sure you won’t find that out of the Feywild, Jessie.
> 
> **Beau:** have none of u seriously ever been to hupperdook????  
>  **Beau:** it’s like the best party town in the empire  
> 

He’d never heard of this place so he looked up the small town in the Empire. Its tourism website claimed to be a titan of industry, making a lot of weaponry for the Empire Military. But when he searched for the town name with “party” after, Molly found a whole host of pictures that looked more like spring break than anything else. There were fireworks and glowsticks and dancing, and it looked like an absolute riot. He wanted to go immediately.

However, Molly looked down at the sleeping wizard on his chest and wondered if there was any way he could relax enough in a week to be able to cut loose in a party town. As fun as this place sounded, Molly definitely wasn’t sure. He went back to typing, cursing his fingers for all the typos he made one handed.

 **Molly:** Do we really want to celebrate at some crazy party in the empirr  
**Molly:** *empire?

 **Beau:** i mean isnt that the point?  
**Beau:** that caleb can party wherever he wants now?

 **Veth:** true true  
**Veth:** we can make sure hes comfortable

 **Caduceus:** We can research the place first so he knows exactly what to expect and see if he’d like to join us there.  
**Caduceus:** Can we find somewhere in Hupperdook that might not be too crowded or overstimulating?  
**Caduceus:** I do think spending time relaxing and carefree in the Empire could be good for Caleb, but in a way we can control.  
**Caduceus:** :-)

 **Beau:** good idea cad  
**Beau:** (yash says so too she just doesnt wanna type)

 **Jester:** I’ll start researching this party town!!!!  
**Jester:** I’ll make a shared file with all my notes and the places we have to visit!!

 **Beau:** hell yea

Smiling at the care his friends took with making everyone around them feel loved and safe, Molly put his phone down and nuzzled closer into Caleb’s hair. He smelled like woodsmoke and cinnamon, just like always, and Molly began to relax even more. Unsure and uncaring if it was because of the tea or not, he drifted off knowing his friends would go to the ends of the Earth to make sure he was safe and happy. They’d done it for Veth and Caduceus and now Caleb. And Molly knew they’d do it for anyone in their little family.

The next week passed by quickly, since he insisted on staying by Caleb at all times. He’d loosened the protective leash a little, allowing Caleb to leave the sanctuary of his arms, but until Ikithon was dead, he was staying within distance to teleport away with his wizard. Just in case. It was probably some of Caleb’s paranoia wiping off on him, but better safe than sorry.

He told himself he wasn’t really worried about the other mage, DeRogna. Caleb talked with Astrid and found that she’d worked with a group that had a purple tiefling in their company years ago and had a falling out. Nothing she seemed particularly angry about any more, but enough to leave a sour taste in her mouth. Anger he could deal with, so long as she didn’t try to settle whatever score it was that he knew nothing of.

Still, it felt safer overall to sit in Caleb’s study at the bookstore as his wizard finally got back to work. Calianna had kept the place running while they were gone, and Veth and Jester had the café bringing in enough money that Yussa could never complain, but he was the only one to do research. With more freedom and less judgement, Molly continued to work on his tarot cards, bringing in paints and sprawling across the floor each day until his elbows ached. Then he’d get up and convince Caleb to come upstairs and eat something with him.

Veth had moved a table close enough to the counter that they could sit nearby and chat with the girls as they worked. Together they would chat about their days and eat whatever strange new thing Jester had concocted. Throughout the week they received news about how everything was going with the execution from Beau, and news about their itinerary in Hupperdook from Jester. Caleb had surprisingly agreed, so long as no one minded if he got overwhelmed and spent time in the tower. Everyone was more than comfortable with that, and he even looked excited about the fireworks and some of the restaurants Jester had chosen. She was taking great care to pick places Caleb would like, finding another Zemnian style pub, and a few places that were smaller, with lively music and without the rave scene. Veth seemed happy at the prospect of a real vacation, given that her last one was a harrowing journey to meet the hag that had ruined her life. Or saving the life of her best friend, if you counted saving Caleb.

Thinking about a relaxed journey where they were far from any source of danger with their friends was very nice in contrast to all they’d been through over the last year.

It was all very calm and easy, and Molly was _very_ eager to share in its quiet comfort for a long time.

Especially once Ikithon was dead.

Molly wasn’t sure what kind of strings Beau was able to pull for Caleb to be allowed to be the one to disintegrate Ikithon’s body, but he was grateful. There would be no worries about it being an illusion or someone who would be able to reverse it as soon as they left. The Cobalt Soul was seeing to it that the ashes would be scattered out at different points around the Lucidian Ocean.

Though Caleb said it would still be possible to bring him back, it would be extremely difficult and highly unlikely. No one wanted to go through the trouble for Ikithon, not now. If they had, they would have done it already.

Ikithon writhed and hollered as they brought him in, still chained in magical suppressing manacles, but soon tied to a table as well. Molly, Caleb, Beau, and a few others were behind a one way mirror, but Ikithon still cursed out Caleb like he was in the room beside him. Luckily, this time Molly had gotten him a few fidgets, and Caleb had a small stone twirling in his fingers. An IV drip was set up and the thrashing slowed then stopped. A member of the Cobalt Soul turned to Caleb and nodded.

Before long, they were no longer looking at a corpse, but a pile of dust.

It was anticlimactic, really, and Ikithon deserved no better. One moment he was a vindictive asshole who was alive, the next he was less than ash. He got to make no fancy speech on his pyre, just cursing out "Bren" as he went. 

Caleb’s tense shoulders fell as he turned to Molly. “It’s... It's really over.”

“Good riddance,” Molly mumbled, snaking his arm around Caleb’s waist.

Beau came over and clapped Caleb on the shoulder. “Congrats, man. Ready to fuckin’ party?”

Caleb chuckled softly, looking back to the pile of ashes and dust that had been the source of his torment for years. “Ja. I’m ready.”


	93. Hupperdook

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> More well deserved fluff!! And finally pushing Jester and Fjord together omg.

### Chapter 93: Hupperdook

Caleb wasn’t sure he’d ever felt so light, at least not since he’d left Blumenthal for the Soltryce Academy. Even with the threat of Vess DeRogna in the back of his mind, he felt like he could soar. Hell, with Trent dead he could cast polymorph without fear of wasting the spell and soar through the sky as a giant eagle whenever he wanted.

But for now, Jester had an itinerary in hand and he was preparing to teleport them all to Hupperdook. One of Yasha’s coworkers had been there recently enough to write her a postcard that would work for the spell, so they would all pile into Caleb and Molly's apartment with suitcases and broad smiles, starting with Jester and Veth. They showed up early to help Caleb pack, insisting that he and Molly would forget something.

The fact that he would be able to replicate anything but his spellbook, journal, phone and component pouch in the tower did nothing to deter them.

Molly seemed to be pleased to be leaving town ever since DeRogna had spoken with them, and Caleb was very happy to see his partner happy. Astrid had found enough about their past interactions that had mostly satisfied Caleb. A falling out where DeRogna didn’t try to have “Lucien” killed or arrested on sight probably wasn’t that bad. If DeRogna had any real issues with whoever was in Molly’s body before, she would likely contact him through Caleb. He could deal with that when the time came.

For now, he could just keep an eye out and make sure Molly was safe.

As if he didn’t plan on doing that anyways.

Frankly, with Molly adorning what he called a “party outfit” it was hard to take his eyes off the tiefling at all. He was wearing a bright white bralette (“for the blacklights”) under a black mesh shirt and bright teal shorts that Molly had customized himself. The customization included making them as short as possible and painting a swirling peacock across the ass.

Caleb didn’t like to stare, but he was just human after all.

Jester had convinced him to put on and pack more casual clothes as well. He was given a pair of dark washed jeans and a soft, faded tee shirt with the cover of _Der Katzenprinz_ printed on it, and told to relax for once. Not complaining since it was soft and comfortable enough, Caleb let Jester and Veth play dress up with him. It would probably be like this for the entire week they were away. Although Jester had pouted at the addition of his book holsters and component pouch, Molly had just kissed his cheek and promised that he “looked good in leather.”

Once he stopped blushing at that everyone else had arrived and they were about ready to go.

“Everyone has everything you need?” he asked, looking at their little group. “Phones, clothes, IDs, magic components? I can replicate many things in the tower, but not those.”

All their friends began to pat their pockets and look through their backpacks for missing items. Beau said, “Ah, fuck, I forgot my phone charger.”

“Oh, you can borrow mine!” Jester said quickly.

“Do you have an android?”

“All the rooms in the tower have spare chargers for all kinds of phones in the drawer of the bedside table. If for some reason I cannot cast the tower, I’m sure we could find one to loan you. Is that all?” Caleb asked.

The others nodded, satisfied with what they’d brought.

“Make sure you’re holding everything you’d like to teleport. If it’s not in your grasp, it will not teleport with us. Is everyone ready?”

“Yes, sir,” Molly said, bumping his hip into Caleb’s as he picked up his suitcase.

Caleb just rolled his eyes and made sure everyone was holding what it seemed like they’d all brought. Once he was sure, he pulled out the postcard Yasha had brought and spoke the arcane words to transport them to Hupperdook.

There was something intoxicating about being able to use such powerful magic on a vacation with his friends. Knowing that he would be casting the tower for them as well, using his eighth level spell slot on something akin to a party, was very very exciting. The little voice in the back of his head that sounded like Trent Ikithon lamented the “wasting” of his magic and skills, but he could just ignore that voice and stare at the grinning faces of his best friends, of his family, staring at the bustling streets of Hupperdook in awe.

Beau and Molly were already buying some kind of firecrackers and Jester had dragged Caduceus and Yasha over to some stalls with flower crowns.

Caleb raised a brow as he watched Fjord inspecting a small unicorn figurine at one of the stalls. But for now he kept quiet, looking at Veth beside him. “Remind me to check to see if there’s a cat figure over there at some point.”

“Of course,” she grinned up at him, eyes sparkling with all of the strange new things glowing about them in the mountain town that was slowly descending into a nighttime of revelry.

He ruffled her hair. “What catches your eye, Schatz?”

She tapped her chin a moment before taking his hand and dragging him over to a stall filled with little trinkets and shiny things. While Veth perused the supply and tried to figure out if the shopkeep was grumpy enough to steal from, Caleb looked for something Molly might like. 

He almost managed not to jump as Molly came up behind him and snuck his arms around his waist. Caleb had seen him coming closer out of the corner of his eye, but he still flinched at the sudden touch. Molly’s voice murmured in his ear, “Sorry, didn’t mean to startle you. Just came to see what shiny things you were stealing for the tower.”

“Which ones would you like?” Caleb asked, melting back into the touch as soon as he realized it was safe.

Molly nuzzled into his neck a moment longer than necessary then began to point out all his favorites, chatting with Veth and arguing about which was the best, silver or gold, gemstones or glass that would catch the sun and cast rainbows. Allowing himself to just relax under Molly’s touch and to pick up whatever shiny thing he and Veth talked about, Caleb felt almost all the tension bleed away from him.

There was nothing to be worried about.

Well, there were like four or five things to be worried about, but they were deep in the recesses of his mind, and Caleb didn’t care. Instead, he could care about memorizing all of Molly and Veth’s favorites to add to their rooms. He became lost in his thoughts as Molly picked up a suncatcher and cast the world in rainbows by holding it up to the sunlight.

His forearms were covered in little refracting rainbows and he didn’t even notice his scars.

The relief he felt in that moment almost brought him to tears.

“Hey, you okay?” Molly asked, tipping his chin so he could inspect Caleb’s face from over his shoulder.

He nodded, covering Molly’s hand with his and cherishing the moment, the warmth, everything. “Just happy. And I had an idea for the tower.”

Molly’s eyes lit up in excitement and he leaned closer to kiss his cheek. “Yeah?”

“Ja,” Caleb said, pulling out a few coins to pay for the suncatcher still in Molly’s other hand.

“And?” Molly asked, tail almost smacking into someone walking behind them with excited curiosity.

But Caleb only grinned, a fan of his secrets. “You’ll see.”

He pouted but let Caleb lead him to follow after Veth and see what kind of explosives Beau had purchased.

Jester caught up with them and began to crown them all with beautiful silk flower crowns hand dyed and woven by one of the craftsmen nearby. She matched them all to everyone’s outfits or hair, or as she told Caleb, eyes. The crown was pretty, blue forget-me-nots and cornflowers all replicated in silk and resting well against his red hair. It was longer now, and as Jester pulled out the tie (for the aesthetic, she claimed), it touched the tops of his shoulders.

Trent hated when his hair grew any longer than an inch.

Caleb grinned and kissed Jester’s cheek as she dragged them off to the old fashioned tavern they’d be spending their first night in. She’d picked it to help Caleb feel more comfortable since the music was live and mostly more like folk songs as opposed to the electronic stuff she said would be coming later in the week. But for tonight he could see the labels of quality beer printed on taps behind the bar and could hear a gnome going wild on a fiddle.

It was going to be a good night.

He went to the bar first with Beau and Molly clinging to his side, ordering the first round for the table. They were served comically large steins of good strong beer like they had back in Blumenthal. Circled around the table, Caleb couldn’t wait to spend the week with his little family, raising his glass to them all.

“How do you say…” Fjord asked, lifting up his stein in question.

Caleb smiled at the curiosity. “Prost!”

Molly grinned and basically slammed his stein into Beau’s. “Prost!”

There were toasts echoed and wide grins shared around the table, even though Jester and Caduceus toasted with their strange steins full of rootbeer. Caduceus and Yasha asked a few polite questions about the end of the trial while Veth challenged Beau to an arm wrestling contest that both of them were cheating at profusely. 

Molly was looking at the musicians and tapping his foot along to the song. It was early enough in the evening that no one had gotten up to dance, though a few patrons had tossed the players some coin. Caleb was well into his first stein when Fjord got up to get his second one and he considered getting up as well to ask Molly to dance.

Then Jester asked, elbows on the table and hands over her cheeks, “Do you think, like… anyone’s secretly in love with me?”

“Everyone’s in love with you, Jester,” Beau said, throwing back a shot of some amber whiskey. 

Caleb laughed, and might have said something similar if his little blue friend didn’t look so dejected. “Are you thinking about someone in particular?”

“Like a certain dashing gentleman who’s conveniently not at the table right now?” Molly asked, waggling his eyebrows up and down while his tail flicked in the direction of Fjord at the bar.

She immediately got defensive, “No! Not at all, gods, Molly you’re so _weird!”_

Caleb squeezed Molly’s hand under the table, imploring him to let it go for now. As much as Jester needed a little push, that wasn’t exactly it. But he could think of something just as good.

He leaned over and whispered in Molly’s ear, delighting in the wicked smile he got in return for revealing his plan. With a quick kiss on the cheek, Molly hopped up and went over to Jester, just as Caleb took Beau’s hand.

“Oh, fuck, Caleb, you know I hate this shit-”

“You’ll be alright. I’ll lead for once, and you follow for once,” he said, taking his old roommate around the floor in a bit of a waltz.

She rolled her eyes, “Alright, whatever, Widogast.”

Though she was pretending to hate every moment, it was hard to forget the basic steps of a waltz when you were drilled such a thing as a child. It seemed strange that the Empire had such a proclivity for fancy parties where ballroom dancing was the norm, but Caleb had always enjoyed waltzing.

Especially when he had a plan.

He swirled around with Beau for a few loops before she told him he really ought to put on a skirt. Caleb only snorted and spun her out, winking at Molly as they switched their dancing partners and he was suddenly dancing with Jester.

“Hallo, blueberry. Are you having fun?”

She grinned, nodding. “Of course! Are you?”

“With your planning? How could I not be?” he asked, smiling at her and hoping the next move would help with the little hint of sadness still hiding in her expression.

She did seem pleased at that, letting him spin her around the dance floor. Jester was much easier to lead than Beau, allowing herself to be twirled and moving her hips so that her pink skirts flowed around her.

Seeing Fjord beginning to set down his drink and take a seat, Caleb winked at Molly and set his plan into action. He started twirling Jester just as Molly bowed away from Fjord and moved back to the table.

Caleb tripped on nothing, leaving Jester to continue spinning until she bumped into Fjord. Molly caught him in stride, beginning to lead him away and winking at Fjord. “Switch!”

Fjord was blushing up a storm as Jester grinned up at him, basically cradled against his chest, until she started showing how it was done. Smiling at the scene, Caleb turned back to Molly and let someone else lead for the first time tonight.

“Caleb Widogast, matchmaker extraordinaire. First Beau and Yasha, now Fjord and Jester? You’re relentless,” Molly grinned, spinning Caleb out and then bringing him much closer.

He rolled his eyes and just moved even closer to kiss Molly quickly, still keeping time with the music. “If they can make each other as happy as I am right now, they deserve to be together,” he said, watching Fjord present Jester with the little unicorn figurine he’d bought earlier.

Molly made a sound that was mostly just a squeal, breaking all the steps of the dance to just hug him as close as possible. “You’re adorable. I’m glad you’re happy. You seem… brighter today. Like the sun.”

“Blinding and distant?” Caleb asked, laughing softly.

He snorted, knocking Caleb with his horn in response to that.

“I’m very happy,” Caleb confided into the crook of Molly’s neck, grateful to the musicians for slowing into a song where they could just hold each other and sway. “I want to live in this moment forever.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> some adorable [fanart](https://gay-alchemist.tumblr.com/post/640739876194615296) from [Doctor_Incubus](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Doctor_Incubus/pseuds/Doctor_Incubus) !!!!!!!!! <3


	94. Der Katzenprinz

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Story time, story time, story time!! (it's just more well deserved softness and rest)

### Chapter 94: Der Katzenprinz

They’d managed to rent the cheapest, smallest room in all of Hupperdook to put Caleb’s tower door in. Before he began to cast, he walked over to Molly’s side and asked, “Could I see that suncatcher one more time?”

Molly fished around in his bag for the suncatcher Caleb had bought for him back on the street, having to sift through piles and piles of firecrackers that he and Beau had grabbed. Triumphant, he pulled it out a few seconds later. Slowly, Caleb turned it all around, inspecting it at all angles and mumbled a few words to himself in Zemnian. None of them were ones that Molly knew, so he just stayed quiet and waited. Frumpkin inspected the suncatcher for a moment, then tucked himself back around Caleb’s neck. Frumpkin had basically had free reign of their booth before they left, crawling through laps and receiving as many pets as he could swindle people out of while Caleb danced.

At first Molly had been a little worried about the servers and the bartender, but when one snuck over and asked if it was okay to give the cat a little scratch, he calmed right down. All the emotional support animal papers he knew were tucked inside Caleb’s journal were unnecessary. It was lovely to see Frumpkin accepted, and Caleb so relaxed he didn’t even need the support of his cat. Of course now he was fulfilling his duty as scarf and keeping close.

The rest of their friends were staggering in behind them, mostly drunk, full of Zemnian style pub food, and very giggly. Fjord had his hand in Jester’s, _finally,_ and she was moving closer so they could lean on each other. She was strong and sober, which was a lot more than could be said for the half orc.

Around them the hotel was loud and full of patrons yelling across the halls and playing loud thumping music, but as soon as they closed the door on the tower they were wrapped in blissful silence, only broken by the others giggling softly.

“Caleb!” Jester drew out the “a” in his name for a full five seconds. “Will you read us all a bedtime story?”

Caleb blinked at Molly’s side as he was ushering them into the tower. “I… Ja, I can do that. Clara? Pepper? Can you get the kitchen to send up hot cocoa for everyone?”

“Oooh, with whipped cream and sprinkles on mine, please!” Jester said with a grin.

“Can I get like, peppermint hot chocolate?” Beau asked.

Yasha nodded, “That sounds good.”

“We can do that,” Caleb nodded, looking around at their friends then back to the cats. “Any other special requests? No? Well, bring up some extra whipped cream, chocolate syrup, and a few bowls full of marshmallows, big and small. If anyone wanted to they could roast a few in the fireplace.”

Jester squealed with delight, clapping her hands together and saying “Up!” to head towards the library.

Molly stopped one of the cats, “Jinx, would you mind getting some help and bringing extra pillows and blankets into the library? I have a feeling we’ll want to be cozy.”

“Oh, and get some of the larger friends to bring everyone’s luggage to their rooms, ja?” Caleb called out.

The little spectral cat meowed at him, darting off and meeting them up in the library with some of the cats that were as big as panthers, draped with piles of soft blankets and holding pillows in their mouths. With the plush couches pushed closer towards the fireplace and Jester eagerly looking around the shelves for the perfect story, it was getting as cozy as possible.

It was like his pillow fort with Caleb on their couch, but magical and full of their entire family. Granted he didn’t need Beau rolling his eyes every time he leaned up to kiss his wizard, but it was still incredibly comfortable in his blanket cape with his mug of hot cocoa. A cat had left them a tray of toppings so he’d covered it completely in whipped cream and chocolate syrup.

A cat had also kindly brought him a stick to roast his marshmallow. Caleb was seated on a puffy chair behind him, acting as his backrest as he turned his marshmallow in his fireplace. Well, Caleb had never told him it was _his_ fireplace, at least not any more than the one in their room. But it had the stained glass window of his coat above it, and he loved to sit in front of it while Caleb read in the Salon, so it was his.

Also he looked properly dramatic lit by fire, and he was definitely a fan. His minorly pyromaniacal wizard seemed to be as well.

Caleb looked as though he might fall asleep at any minute, curled in his chair and playing with Molly’s hair as he leaned against his legs. He startled a bit when Jester finally picked a book and Molly felt a tiny marshmallow fall somewhere in his hair.

“Oops, sorry, Molly,” Jester grinned, not looking apologetic at all as he fished it out and flung it over at her.

He got a lucky shot, beaming her right in the nose and sending her into a fit of giggles. She sat beside him and started to roast her own marshmallow, angling towards Caleb as he looked at the book she’d picked out.

Molly stared up and found the fondest look on Caleb’s face as he thumbed through what looked to be an old children’s book with a dapper little cat on the cover.

“A good one?” he asked, not wanting to break the spell, but wanting to be part of the moment all the same.

He nodded. “A very good one. Excuse me a moment, liebling,” he said, shifting behind him and causing Molly to almost spill cocoa on his lap. It was mostly his own fault, and he was allowed back soon enough, Caleb’s hand full of some green powder and a piece of fleece.

Caleb’s hands swirled above them and an image began to project up above their heads, not so high as to crane their necks, but able to be seen by everyone. It began to show the illustrations of the book in his hands, animated slightly as Caleb translated the Zemnian and the cats began to dance.

Molly was entranced with the little cat in the top hat, and the little boy that looked a touch more like Caleb than the illustrations he’d taken a peek at earlier. Caleb did voices for each of the characters, even though they all carried his thick accent, and Molly could hear the smile on his voice with each new page.

“‘Danke,’ he said, as he looked down at the hat in his hands. And placing it upon his head, he smiled, kicked up his heels, and quietly started to dance his way all the way back home.

“The End,” Caleb said, closing the book and making the boy in the illusion take a little bow for his audience before dancing off into a fading sunset.

Veth looked up from her sleepy place on the couch. “If you don’t read that for Luc the next time you babysit, I’m calling it child cruelty.”

“You should do readings at the bookstore,” Caduceus said. “I’m sure Kiri and other kids in the neighborhood would love to hear stories like that.”

Jester nodded eagerly, “We could make little snacks based on each book! Like little cookies of kittens!”

“We could ice them with little top hats,” Veth nodded. “I bet Luc would love that. Yeza could probably make us a special cookie cutter for the shape.”

Caleb shrugged, “If you think it would bring in more customers.”

“Guaranteed. You’ll have single parents swooning after your sweet voice from miles away. I bet you’ll sell ten copies of each picture book with every reading.” Molly punctuated his point by nuzzling into Caleb’s leg.

The man blushed softly, about to protest, but luckily their friends were relentless. “Oh, I bet you're right, with your accent, Caleb!” Jester said. “And now that you’re not so dirty, you’re quite handsome.”

“People do like accents,” Yasha said quietly, getting a kiss on the cheek from Beau in response.

“You’re extremely handsome and I’ll have Luc tell all his friends at school about it,” Veth said, effectively shutting down any protests Caleb had.

He just sighed softly and shrugged. “If you think it would be a good idea. The spell costs 25 gold to cast, so if we don’t break even we can just call it off.”

Jester rolled her eyes, stealing a marshmallow off of Fjord’s cocoa and talking with her mouth full, “We’re gonna make so much money, Caleb. Just wait and see.”

He made a sound that was more like a snort than anything else, but it was quickly covered up by a yawn.

“I think it’s high time we all went to bed. We are on vacation, but if we want to follow Jester’s itinerary, we’ll be getting up soon,” Caduceus said, stretching from his spot taking up an entire couch across from Caleb and Molly.

Yasha and Beau held hands and slipped away with quick goodnights, clearly going to utilize the mirrored bed in Beau’s room. Maybe Molly should ask about something like that. Caleb might not find it quite as sexy or interesting for himself though.

Caduceus made sure that Molly had his special tea before he went to bed, then he and Caleb were left to travel to the eighth floor alone. 

Molly loved floating up to the bedroom. Clinging to Caleb and feeling weightless was fun while sober, and while still buzzed made him feel like a god. He sent them spinning, kissing his wizard deeply until Caleb pulled back and started to look dizzy. That sent him into a fit of giggles that lasted until he walked into their shared room and let out a gasp.

Somehow, Caleb had taken the little crystal suncatcher and made a similar design that wrapped around the dancing lights in the room like miniature cages, around the size of a tennis ball. They cast the room in refracting, dancing rainbows that twisted and played with the colors of all of Molly’s tapestries. It was stunning, and Caleb had made it just for him.

He felt drawn to Caleb like gravity, kissing him again, deeper this time.

Pulling back once Caleb was beautifully flushed and breathless, Molly kissed his nose. “You’re amazing. You know that, right?”

He only blushed deeper, pulling them closer so he could bury his face in Molly’s neck. “You’re worth doing amazing things for,” he mumbled, though Molly could still feel the heat radiating from his cheeks.

“I might need to learn some more magic, to keep up,” Molly joked.

“I owe you my life and my freedom, Mollymauk. There is no need.” Caleb’s voice was reverent and soft, but his words, a bit concerning.

Molly pulled back again, tipping up his chin so he could look in those blue eyes. “You know we’re not keeping score, right? I love you. This isn’t transactional.”

“I know that,” Caleb said too quickly. His eyes darted down. “That is… That is something I’m still unlearning.”

Tipping up his chin even more, Molly very slowly pressed their lips together, then rested his forehead on Caleb’s so he could look in his eyes. _“You_ are worth the world to me. Not your spells, or your smarts, or any one part of you. Just like I hope you’re not living with me just because I’m good with a sword and make mean pancakes.”

Caleb cracked a small smile. “Of course not, liebling. I do understand, it’s just hard sometimes.”

He nodded and leaned up to kiss Caleb’s forehead as tenderly as he could manage. “Well, I’ll be here to remind you.”

Caleb nodded back, giving Molly a quick squeeze before pulling back and going to grab whatever it was he needed to get ready for bed. Unable to let it go, or resist hugging him one more time, Molly came up behind him and hugged him around the waist. He kissed behind Caleb’s ear.

“As long as it takes, I’ll be here.”

He melted into Molly’s touch, leaning back. “I wouldn’t want you anywhere else.”


	95. By the Light of the Fireworks

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> a pinch of happiness, a smattering of love, and a little smidgen of fjorester <3

### Chapter 95: By the Light of the Fireworks

Molly had convinced Caleb to drink some of the enchanted tea that would keep him dreamless after finishing reading _Der Katzenprinz,_ and with the long day he’d had before, he’d practically passed out the moment he and Molly hit the sheets. Though Jester had a strict itinerary, it allowed for everyone’s hangovers to be slept off.

She did insist once everyone was awake that they’d go to brunch at a spot she’d found with good reviews online. Caleb was pretty sure she just wanted to go for the waffle bar, but once Veth and Beau had seen the advertisement for bottomless mimosas, there was nothing he could do to stop them. As much as he loved serving everyone meals in the tower, he did understand that occasionally people wanted waitstaff that wasn’t feline, wrong though they were.

Another strange party outfit materialized from Molly’s belongings, with a black sequined crop top that was essentially another bra, and a high waisted maroon skirt that twirled with every step. It was a strange material that flowed smoothly over Molly’s hips but had pressed pleats partway down that flowed out like a mermaid’s tail, and Caleb wanted nothing more than to reach out and touch it.

It was tantalizing, and caught the light even under the table as they ate piles of waffles and pancakes and omelettes and everything else Jester could think to order.

After about an hour of resisting the urge and letting his hands just brush over the fabric as they sat down to their brunch, Caleb realized something. There was no reason not to touch the fabric. Molly wouldn’t mind. No one would care that they were together in public, and there was no way that someone could use their relationship against him.

There was no strange power play like there would have been with Astrid. There was no question as to whether it would chase Molly away. Caleb was free to do whatever he wanted. If Molly wanted him to stop, he would stop.

It was as simple as that.

He slipped his arm around Molly’s waist and rubbed the fabric in small circles with his thumb. It was sleek and silky under his touch and Molly grinned at the casual contact, earning Caleb a kiss on the cheek as they walked away from the brunch place. His cheeks flushed at the extra public display of affection, but he couldn’t help but to enjoy how Molly in turn leaned closer, keeping them together. How passersby would know they were a happy couple. How warm Molly was against his side, contrasting the sleek, cool fabric.

Caleb wasn’t used to feeling so much freedom.

Knowing he would never again turn around and see Ikithon standing behind him was liberating in ways he couldn’t have imagined when the old man was alive. Knowing from Astrid and Eadwulf that the rest of the Volstrucker were grateful Trent was gone was more than he’d ever expected. He didn’t know what to do with himself. Of course he was still watchful; this was a town that begged for pickpockets and others who might take advantage of his friends.

But knowing that the worst thing that might happen to them was likely losing a piece of jewelry or a few coin?

He felt as though he could eat the world raw.

Though he was unsure of how to celebrate his new freedom, Caleb was more than happy to let Mollymauk and his other friends take the reins. Why shouldn’t they go dancing after visiting the history museum? Why shouldn’t he let his ridiculous friends take him to some silly, overcrowded club and feed him a constant stream of too sweet cocktails? Why should he be worried? Was he worried about Volstrucker hiding in plain sight? About one of the people in the room recognizing him?

What did it matter if he relaxed?

What did it matter if he let Molly drag him out to a dance floor to show him _Molly’s_ preferred way of dancing, which was somehow more intimate than a waltz, even among the hoards of people and overly loud music?

It didn’t.

And so Caleb, ever so slightly, relaxed his constant vigilance. He could feel his shoulders lowering, his jaw unclenching, his eyes stop darting around the room when no one was looking. It was a lovely, heady feeling, better than the alcohol by leagues and miles. He wasn’t sure he’d ever feel used to it.

He _was_ sure he’d never get used to watching Molly dance.

There had to be others in the club that were staring too, but Molly, _his_ Molly, just stayed with their friends, denying others dances and winking whenever he saw Caleb watching. He could watch the fabric of the skirt shift and catch along Molly’s hips, swirling with every whirl and twirl, and if he wanted to, he could rejoin him, run his fingers over it again.

Instead of the steady insidious shame and guilt Caleb was used to feeling when looking at things he didn’t think he deserved, he felt a swell of something akin to pride. It was mostly love, as he dissected the strange feeling, but there were glimmers of other things as he took it all apart. The way Molly looked in his necklace, the way Molly winked at him across the dance floor, the fact that he could get up and Molly would accept a dance with him without hesitation, that he could go over and kiss him at any moment, it all made his heart ache in a way he wasn’t used to.

It was pleasant, strange though it was. 

“Guys, it’s time to head down for the fireworks! I found a travel blog that posted about a little park nearby where we can watch them and I got pastries!” Jester somehow managed to get her voice to resonate loud enough in the club for everyone to hear, lifting up a picnic basket seemingly from nowhere (though from the look on Fjord’s face, he might have had the honor of carrying it while she danced).

Caleb nodded, standing out of his seat and moving closer. There was no way she could hear him that well, but he still tried to be heard as he said, “I have a few blankets in my bag, if people want to sit on them.”

“That’s perfect, Caleb!” she beamed, kissing his cheek before they all started weaving their way out of the packed dance hall.

Molly thankfully kept his hand around Caleb’s, finding his way through the crowd with practiced ease. When they were met with the cool night air again, he twirled so that Caleb’s hand was wrapped around his waist again and leaned over to whisper in his ear. “So you like this skirt, huh?”

He flushed darkly, thankful for the low light before remembering Molly could see in the dark regardless. “Sorry, ich- I like-”

“Hey, hey, it’s okay, I’m just teasing,” Molly assured him, wrapping his own arm around Caleb’s shoulders and pulling him close enough to press a kiss to his temple. “I know it’s a fun fabric.”

Caleb just melted into the touch, nodding helplessly and letting him guide the two of them behind their friends. At the park Jester distributed little pastries she’d purchased earlier to everyone, then Beau and Molly handed out glow sticks while Caleb searched for the extra blankets he kept in his small bag of holding.

Yasha carried a blanket too, and Caduceus decided to climb the tree they were sitting under for a better vantage point, so he was left to fish out his blankets for himself, Veth, Fjord, and Jester.

He noticed Jester was leaning heavily into Fjord, and for once, Fjord had wrapped his arm around her in kind. A smile spread across his face as he situated himself on the blanket, poofing Frumpkin out of his pocket dimension now that he wasn’t worried the cat would get trampled in the club or the street.

Molly usurped Caleb’s backpack with a grin, leaning it up against the tree and using it as a pillow. “Rest on my lap; get comfy,” he said, patting the material of the skirt.

How could he say no?

Caleb curled up on his side to look down the mountain where they’d be setting off the fireworks, sending Frumpkin to purr up against his legs where Veth had made her seat. The fabric was cool and soft under his cheek and Molly absentmindedly twined his fingers through Caleb’s hair as they waited for the show to begin.

Apparently they set off fireworks at the end of every work week here in Hupperdook, to kick off an entire weekend of partying. Many of the people in the city were uninterested by them since it was such a routine, just cheering as they set off the first few volleys of colored sparks into the sky, but there were a few other tourists in the park with them.

As it grew darker the fireworks grew bigger, resonating in Caleb’s chest as they shook the earth with great crashes and pops. He had seen many of them before, but others appeared to be enchanted. One large one exploded into the image of a sparkling, purple bird that then flew a few loops before disappearing. Another looked like an archer that knelt and sent a second volley of fireworks up from their bow, arching above them higher than Caleb had ever seen.

Jester squealed with joy as the next appeared to be a unicorn fighting and triumphing over a manticore. Veth had taken out her phone and started filming a few of them to show Luc for later. She leaned over and called out to Caleb that she was going to get a better angle, levitating herself and leaving him and Molly alone on the blanket.

Caleb gave her a small wave as she got her videos for Luc, turning back just in time to see a peacock appear, gleaming in bright teals and revealing its massive shimmering tail, shining with all the colors under the sun throughout its feathers. Above him, he could hear Molly’s small gasp at the sight and turned just in time to see the positively enamored look on his face.

His tattoos gleamed in the flashing lights and colors and his eyes were filled with wonder as fantastic creature after fantastic creature crashed above their heads.

But Caleb was entranced, watching how the light caught Molly’s eyes and flashed over his teeth. Caleb’s silver necklace caught the light too, a little mark of his own on Molly’s neck. He was beautiful, and he was, by some miracle, in love with Caleb.

He was probably the luckiest person in the world.

When Molly looked down and met his gaze, Caleb felt the whole world stop, just for a moment, with no dunamancy required, and he took the chance to memorize every curve of his face and how the light and shadows played tricks with it. Once again he was struck with the desire to live in this one crystalized moment for the rest of his life, resting in the lap of someone he adored and looking up at his beautiful face in the light of the fireworks.

But there would be many moments like this. He could have this for the rest of their lives, and for once, that seemed like it would be quite a long time. There was no need to pause in this moment, because the next would be just as lovely, so long as they were together.

Molly grinned down at him, and he knew it all to be true.

“Look,” he whispered, pointing a ways away to a different blanket.

Caleb shifted his head carefully, looking across rather than up, and caught sight of Jester and Fjord pulling apart from a very chaste kiss.

He felt a smile grow across his face as he realized all of his friends were probably feeling the same happiness he was in this moment, at least to some degree. Everyone was happy, everyone seemed to be at peace, and later he could protect them all in his tower.

Life was damn near perfect, and he wouldn’t be giving it up for anything.


	96. Cockiness

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Molly's feeling a little too sure of himself. But there's an unfortunate truth about loose threads. They get snagged, and the whole tapestry begins to unravel.

### Chapter 96: Cockiness

Watching Caleb so happy made Molly feel as though his life had been blessed by the Moonweaver herself. While he knew there were other wills and other gods that would throw their own wrenches into his lovely plans, for now things seemed to be perfect. They were surrounded by their little family, and everyone was brimming with happiness.

Each day was filled with whatever Jester thought would be fun, with some grounding suggestions from either Beau or Veth about money or jail time. But of course sometimes they only added to the chaos, leaving them to crash into the tower each night breathless and cheeks aching from too many smiles. Caleb would prepare them late night snacks and make sure everyone was as comfortable as possible.

Molly saw Caleb taking great pride in making his final tweaks to the tower, like helping the hammock in Fjord’s room to sway gently like they were at sea. Or making a small passageway between Beau and Yasha’s rooms, complete with their two beds getting a little bit larger. Or Jester’s personal cat who would cuddle with her at night and always had pastries on standby from the kitchen. Veth never asked for upgrades after the first few times the tower was summoned, but Molly noticed whenever he walked by there would be new trinkets hanging from the walls. It was perfect; it was everything Molly had ever craved and never known.

Something deep inside him basked in the emergence of what felt like his true family, of people who would never abandon him. People who would probably literally go to the hells and back for him if he asked. People he loved endlessly. He thought he’d never get over how they all seemed to glow like the sun, despite Beau still being the biggest asshole he’d ever met.

Their happiness was contagious, especially since Jester and Fjord finally made a move and realized they both reciprocated their feelings.

It wasn’t like he could really judge, with how long he pined over his wizard, but he did anyways, just a little.

Whatever it was, the will of the gods or just a happy accident, he thanked the Moonweaver for it regardless. Molly’s life had changed for the better ever since he met Caleb, and he knew she looked after lovers. He’d begun to put a bit more faith in her, and fate, and his tarot cards, after he got Caleb back from Ikithon. If someone had asked him two years ago if he believed in prayer and faith, he would have spun some bullshit since he didn’t have any better answers. But he’d prayed to the Moonweaver for Caleb, and Caleb was back in his arms, happier than ever. If prayers could protect them, even just a bit, he would never stop.

Caleb’s newfound confidence was contagious and he felt as though the two of them could have taken on the entire world together. What did they really have to fear? Together they’d felled gorgons, faced hags, and taken down Ikithon. The longer the peace they’d found stretched on, the cockier Molly got. With Caduceus’s tea and Caleb’s protective necklace, he felt almost completely at ease again.

He should have realized that good things never last for long, not when you have a loose thread.

No, when you have a loose thread, it tends to hit a snag and unravel everything you’ve built up until it comes crashing down at your feet. He knew that. He knew how to embroider, how to knit and crochet, yet he pushed the loose thread to the back of his mind and just tried to make a note not to let it snag on anything. Maybe it would be like macrame, and have enough knots to remain stable even if tugged. There was no way to know, so there was no use worrying about it.

The longer Molly was away from the worries of the trial, the calmer he felt about that archmage recognizing him. If Caleb really wasn’t worried, he wouldn’t waste his time worrying either. If it presented itself as a problem, they would deal with it, together. They could handle anything, no matter what it was.

It didn't occur to him to be worried about social media, even though Astrid had revealed that to be how she found Caleb and kept tabs on him. There were other purple tieflings out there with decent followings. But not ones who did tarot readings and posted pictures of their tattoos.

Not ones with pictures of Caleb now public, since Molly was eager to reveal to the world his very attractive partner, now that things were safe. He wanted to memorialize the redhead dancing, laughing, grinning and fascinated at museums, everything. The stories seemed harmless; saved on his phone and disappearing after twenty four hours.

He'd curse himself out for that at some point, but now was not the time. 

No, now was definitely not the time, not when some stranger had hooked their arm in his and was leading him away from the group. He was more confused than anything, at first, trying to turn down the girl’s advances.

She only interrupted him, her voice older than it should be, “Walk with me.”

“I should really be getting back, miss-”

“Calm down. If you were so easy to kill, you’d be dead already.”

Goosebumps sprung up over his arms as he tried to place the voice. He knew it, but he didn’t want to believe it. They were supposed to be safe here. This was their vacation. She wasn’t supposed to know where he was, even though he knew it wouldn’t be difficult to track the street signs in his recent videos. It would have been easy to ask around for a purple tiefling. But still, he couldn’t bring himself to believe it. It couldn’t be happening. 

His voice was the right amount of confused, though there was a sliver too much panic in his tone that he needed to rein in. “Who are you? What do you want?”

“Oh, don’t play dumb with me, _Lucien;_ I know you can see through it with the eyes. I know everything about that book but its power,” she hissed, and he felt a chill run down his spine as he wrenched his arm away from her. He should have known the fabric felt wrong. She was in some kind of disguise.

The voice was one that would have haunted his dreams if he’d allowed himself to have any, and he’d ignored it long enough.

“I take it you have something you want from me? Approaching me so blatantly in public then?” he asked, trying to pull up some haughty persona while his mouth went dry and his knees felt like they might give out on him at any moment. He still didn’t know what this woman wanted. Having an archmage pissed at him was one thing. But there was murder in the disguised eyes of Vess DeRogna, and he didn’t want to stick around to see it.

“Well, I made the mistake of leaving a body behind last time. Don’t think I’ll be so foolish this time around,” she hissed. She was poised like a viper, hand wrapped around some arcane focus and the other stuffed inside a small black pouch that Molly knew would hold all the components needed to reduce him to ash.

But her pose didn’t startle him so much as her words.

_Last time._

_A body._

He blanched, trying to keep the look of shock off his face. But his poker face was hard to find. He’d spent so much time pushing away from his past, having one of the biggest questions of it answered had floored him. 

It was _her._

 _She_ was the reason he had been abandoned. The reason he woke up in a shallow grave, choking on dirt and scraping his way to the surface until his fingers bled.

Vess DeRogna was the one who tried to kill him. The one who _did_ kill his past self. The one who left him behind in a poorly dug grave with no marker, no memories, no friends, no family, no one who cared for him, and, it sounded like, no heartbeat. 

His voice was a bit more brittle, but he just hoped she was too angry to notice. Clearly she had some healthy respect for how powerful he was, and perhaps how powerful he could be. “And what makes you think I haven’t gotten stronger?”

She only scoffed at him. “I’m still alive; so you’re clearly weaker. Whether you’ve gotten weaker physically or in spirit, I suppose I’ll find out quite soon. But given how you cling to your new pet wizard, little Bren, you must not have gained back your full powers. He can’t protect you forever.”

Molly’s mind was racing. His stomach churned as Vess referred to Caleb with his old name, and worse, as a pet, but he was really caught up on other words. 

_Your full powers._

All this ridiculousness was tied to his blood powers; he had known that. But for his past self to have been even stronger than he was now? It seemed nonsensical. Molly was as strong as he’d ever been, and he could feel himself practically brimming with power. DeRogna said he would have been able to see through her disguise. Hells, she thought he still could, but _still_ wasn’t as strong as his past self.

And he knew the nine eyes scattered over his body were from the city.

Whatever ritual was used to kill his past self and leave him behind, she was behind it.

And she wanted to do it again.

The thought of losing everything he’d built shook him to his very core. Starting from scratch, or being tossed into oblivion, wasn’t an option. Not one he could deal with.

Molly didn’t know where he’d end up if he died. There was no way of knowing where his soul would end up. With his luck, he might end up in the Astral Sea and made to be the plaything of the city despite all his fighting.

There was no way to know, and he really didn’t want to find out.

Still, he felt paralyzed.

His sword hung heavy at his waist, indecision in his heart. Was this how Caleb felt when Ikithon stood in their living room?

This horrible heavy feeling about putting his friends in danger for the sake of maybe, _maybe_ living another day?

He looked around at the bustling town square they’d ended up in. It had steps, tiered like a cake up the mountain, but was clear of buildings and full instead of merchants and buskers. There were children running up and down the steps, giggling and threatening to push each other into a nearby fountain.

Molly could hear the calls of salespeople trying to attract customers to purchase whatever it was they’d brought out to this little makeshift shopping district. Jewelry, the best in Marquet, or pastries better than your mother used to make, or fireworks enchanted like you’ve never seen before.

Lively people that were just trying to make a living in this little square.

Molly wondered if they’d ever watched someone die.

If she might kill them all too, or whisk him away as Ikithon had, to torture or kill him in private.

But unlike Caleb, their friends wouldn’t be able to bring him back. Not if he fucked this up.

His mind was tunneling a bit, staring at all the innocent people around him. Everything seemed sluggish as he felt the crackle of some arcane force from the archmage before him. For the first time, he rather wished he remembered what it was like to die, just to know what to expect. He wished for some part of his subconscious to let him know how it felt.

Instead, he heard a voice, a wonderful voice with a lovely Zemnian accent, though it sounded too panicked. 

_”Mollymauk!”_


	97. Panic

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> fight! fight! fight! (this is a bit of a bloody one, folks)

### Chapter 97: Panic

One moment, Mollymauk was at Caleb’s side, looking at a small stall of trinkets along the road, and the next he could no longer see the colorful tiefling.

They had just been wandering around a large town square, full of screaming, playing children and small carts of trinkets and souvenirs. It was the perfect place for Veth and Molly to find something interesting, and had enough to look at to be intriguing to the rest of them too. Caleb had been admiring some of the architecture and trying to look up where the nearest bookstore was on his phone. He’d stopped alongside the cart Molly had been standing at to look at his maps app, but when he looked up he was alone.

Veth was nearby, fishing coins out of the fountain with her mage hand. Jester and Fjord were looking at a similar cart to the one where he’d gotten her little carved unicorn. Caduceus had found somewhere to buy a tall iced tea and was wandering on his own. Beau and Yasha had their arms linked, looking at other little carts and shops too.

No purple tieflings in sight.

Not even a jingle of familiar jewelry. 

It didn’t take long for Caleb’s newfound lightness to plummet back to earth. 

The panic he’d been shoving down below the surface surged up like a tidal wave, threatening to overtake him. He tried to be rational. Molly got distracted by shiny things just as Veth did occasionally, and it meant nothing that he couldn’t find him in the crowd. His heart was pounding, but he could be rational, for now. It wasn’t the worst thing in the world that he could see all his friends but Molly. Regardless of how it felt.

He probably ducked into a storefront to find a bathroom or check out some more jewelry. Things were probably fine. Still, Caleb wanted to find him.

Running over to Yasha and Beau, now looking over a display of cell phone cases carved from trees supposedly charred by the ancient red dragon Thordak himself. It just looked like blackened wood to Caleb, but he wasn’t really focused on that at the moment. He was focused on getting to Yasha, who was tall enough to see over the crowd.

“Yasha, do you see Mollymauk?” he asked, trying not to look nearly as panicked as he felt.

She blinked, looking up from the small cart of phone cases and looking around the crowd. “Ah, no, but it’s rather bright and crowded. Perhaps Caduceus-”

“Good idea,” Caleb said quickly, moving to find the firbolg, his head bobbing over the crowd by a good foot as he looked at a fountain in the middle of the square.

He caught Caduceus’s arm and asked the taller man, “Can you see Mollymauk?”

“Oh, I think I saw him somewhere. Wow, he went quite far away. I wonder who he’s with-”

Caleb looked in the direction Caduceus was looking and started that way, walking quickly but not running yet. Could have been someone perfectly normal that Molly knew. He met a lot of people at the Lavish Chateau, and even more giving tarot readings at Gustav’s Emporium. There could be a perfectly reasonable explanation for why Molly had walked so far away.

And Caleb had a right to be concerned. He’d just ask if Molly was okay, and then give him all the privacy he needed. Molly would probably understand his anxiety. He wouldn’t find Caleb too clingy.

Hopefully.

He still couldn’t get the rising feeling of dread out of his gut.

There was indeed a woman, like Caduceus had said, clinging to Molly’s arm and now in Caleb’s sight. She was red haired and human, and might have even passed for Caleb’s sister if he stood next to her. Caleb had never seen anyone like her in his life, and some of that was comforting.

He couldn’t see his face, but he saw how Molly wrenched his arm back and away from her, backing up.

Caleb couldn’t help himself then, needing to make sure he was okay. He called out, “Mollymauk!”

Molly turned to see him, relief spreading across his distressed face, but the woman turned too. Her eyes narrowed at him and he saw Molly look at her in horror as she pulled out some arcane focus. The way she did it looked odd, like her dress rippled. She hadn’t pulled it out of a pocket. There was a disguise involved, and Caleb was still a bit too far to dispel it.

Swearing under his breath and trying to close the gap between them, at least to get close enough to cast dispel magic and see if that really was a disguise or someone else from Molly’s past, or just more paranoia and a selfie stick, Caleb watched ten people in the crowd suddenly all turn and rush towards him. There were too many to avoid completely, and they all seemed to beeline straight for him. He ducked out of the way of a half orc woman, only to be caught around the arm by a Goliath.

His eyes were glazed over, mumbling, “Restrain the red headed human.” A dwarven woman with the same look lunged forward, trying to grab Caleb’s other arm and mumbling the same thing.

Taking a deep breath and a risk, Caleb cast seeming on all the people coming to hold him back, changing their appearance so they looked like him. Immediately the half orc woman, who now looked like him, tackled the taller version of him that was the Goliath man, and he was able to slip into the crowd with a quick dash through the crowd as the rest continued to dogpile and restrain themselves.

He could still see the woman, close enough now for him to dispel what he hoped was a disguise. Well, he wasn’t sure what he hoped for, running on adrenaline and just trying to get close enough to Molly to help if things went wrong. Would it have been better for it to be Vess DeRogna, or someone else? DeRogna might have been the simpler answer, but he still wasn’t sure. There wasn’t time to deliberate.

He grabbed copper wire out of his pocket and hoped Veth was still in range. “Archmage here to hurt Molly, near bookstore southeast of town square. Ignore the people who look like me in the middle. Backup please.”

Veth answered quickly, sounding like she was already running, “On my way! Stay safe please, Caleb. JESTER, BEAU, EVERYONE GET YOUR ASSES OVER HERE, CALEB AND MOLLY ARE IN TROUBLE-” Caleb winced as she started screaming and then was cut off at the six second mark.

He took a moment to look around the square, trying to assess the situation. Caleb was a little concerned with the sheer amount of people in the square. His most powerful spells all required huge empty areas for him to rain fire down upon his enemies. This was not ideal. Some people were beginning to leave after seeing the brawl that was made of just himself, but he would need more to vacate the area if he really wanted to have a decent chance at fighting an archmage.

Caleb needed to make some kind of a distraction that wouldn’t actually hurt anyone.

Chewing his lip, he tried to think of something.

And since it was Caleb, the answer was always fire.

He gauged how high up he would need to set off the fireball to scare enough people while injuring no one. He didn’t want so much as a rogue spark hitting a dry patch of grass.

Those kinds of calculations were easy for him, echoing naturally in his mind like they had a thousand times before. He could predict the screams before he even heard the explosion reach its apex. These were decent screams, health screams of fear and respect for fire and getting the fuck away. These were tolerable screams that accompanied the smell of smoke and scattering townspeople. 

With that taken care of, he was finally close enough to the woman to dispel the disguise.

Of course, now revealed and her own plan foiled, Caleb could see her donning some kind of armor and hurling a spell his way as well.

Molly whirled into action then, slicing along his neck lightly to ignite the scimitar with ice. The motion was practiced and elegant, like most physical things Molly put his mind to.

For a moment, Caleb thought about the poetic nature of them being so drawn to fire and ice, reducing both to harmless water, stable and useful around each other. But he didn’t have long to think about that as she was currently pointing her focus at him and calling out a spell.

He didn’t have to be very good at reading lips to see her mouth the word “pain.”

All he had to do was be grateful that he’d grown strong enough to shrug off such a spell, knowing the debilitating torture the power word could summon all too well. It wasn’t a spell that good people had written in their spellbooks. Even while scouring the Volstrucker’s spellbooks for all the power he could get his hands on, he’d skipped over that spell. Every time.

There was no need to bring more pain into the world, pain with no purpose but pain.

No, today he would cause pain with one goal in mind, and that was to protect Molly. Her trying to torture him was all he needed to know.

She deserved to burn. 

And Caleb was close enough to do just that. He was endlessly grateful for adapting his own fire spell to hit one specific target. Pulling out the cat’s cradle and speaking the familiar words, feeling the fire coursing through his veins, Caleb sent it at her with everything he had.

As she sidestepped the swirling strings of fire and only caught part of the explosion around her, he cursed and decided there were more important things to be taken care of.

He finally got close enough to Mollymauk that he felt like he might be able to protect him, and cast haste on the now angry looking tiefling who was unable to land a blow. Vess was faster than Caleb had thought, but he was doing alright with some cover behind an abandoned food cart.

Even though the cart was now halfways disintegrated from a spell that had barely missed him.

“Leave him alone! Just teleport away from here and be done with this. He has never done anything to you!” Caleb cried out, attempting to charm her, just long enough for them to disappear. This wasn’t where he wanted to fight. It would be so much easier in an open space, as much as trying to manipulate wills in this way made his stomach turn.

She scoffed, “You’re an even bigger fool than I thought, Bren.” Vess spat his old name like a curse.

“Fich mich,” he muttered, trying to think of a better plan. She was getting bored of him; Caleb could hear it in her tone.

He hadn’t wasted nearly enough of her spells.

Around him he could hear familiar shouts, but he should have figured that DeRogna wouldn’t have come alone. He threw up his shield at the last second, avoiding an onslaught of magic missiles. He hadn’t been able to count them all, but the sheer number of them spoke to the power of the caster and put a lump in his throat.

But he could hear Veth screaming in vengeance, and Yasha bellowing alongside her, so he didn’t compromise what little cover he had. It was the perfect place to watch DeRogna, and he didn’t have time to be distracted.

“You should have stayed dead, Lucien,” she spat, summoning some horrible necromantic energy and looking at Molly instead of Caleb. “There can only be one Nonagon. Apparently to be one myself, you have to die. This time I won’t be such a fool as to leave your body intact.”

Caleb quickly moved out from his cover, getting close enough to quickly counter her spell. She whipped around to face him, rage filling her eyes. “You’ve gotten stronger, Bren. Too bad you stopped training with Trent early.”

Vess knew he wasn’t fast enough to counter her again so quickly, leaving him out in the open and effectively defenseless.

He hadn’t realized how close she and Molly had gotten. Ves had effectively placed herself in between them, turning and leaving Mollymauk to dart up and jab into Caleb’s side. He smelled the stench of sulfur and death before he felt the ache, staggering backwards and beginning to cough.

Blood splattered across his hands, and he could feel tears drip down his cheeks. But his tears dripped down to the pavement thick and red. His whole body trembled and felt weak, but he was still standing.

For now, at least. The blood continued to trickle from his eyes, and he was starting to feel it slipping out from his ears too.

Any second now, he felt like he might collapse, but Mollymauk needed him. He wiped the blood from his eyes and readied his next spell.


	98. Contagion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The other half of the battle! Contagion is nasty and I want to see it more!!

### Chapter 98: Contagion

Molly’s heart was racing, as he tried his best to distract Vess DeRogna from attacking Caleb, who she seemed to find as the biggest threat. With his ability to counter spells and his knowledge of her, he might have been. Hells, everyone who really knew Caleb knew he was a force of nature and only gaining strength every day. But Molly didn’t plan on being a pushover. 

No, he mostly planned on getting to Caleb and cutting down DeRogna where she stood. 

Even though she’d brought half of the Cerberus Assembly behind her, even though she was looking at Caleb like he was just a maggot in her way, even though Molly had no idea how to cut her down. It was the only plan he had, and he was sticking with it, especially since the rest of the Mighty Nein had managed to clear the square and take on the other mages she'd brought with her. For now at least, he could try and execute his plan. This seemed like the best chance they would get to take DeRogna down, and she’d thrown the first attack.

Molly had seen a kid video taping the beginning of the fight and doing so. That video was practically guaranteed to show up online somewhere, and it meant he had proof. And a new appreciation of laws in the Dwendalian Empire, where everything was based on honor and there wasn’t much penalty for killing someone who was trying to kill you.

Not much time to think about that now though, as he attempted to dodge another blow, this one aimed at him.

“You should have stayed dead, Lucien,” DeRogna hissed, waving her hands and casting something that pulsed with dark black energy. “There can only be one Nonagon. Apparently to be one myself, you have to die. This time I won’t be such a fool as to leave your body intact.”

Caleb stepped closer, eyes wide, muttering arcane words and making the energy fizzle out of DeRogna’s hands. No need for Molly to dodge at all. She roared in anger, hair escaping her immaculate bun, and turned her attention back on Caleb. “You’ve gotten stronger, Bren. Too bad you stopped training with Trent early.”

A twisted grin crossed her face and her collar loosened, revealing some of the same tattoos that Mollymauk had. Molly’s gut churned, threatening to overturn. Whatever his past was, he’d never imagined it would be this bad. He’d never imagined it would hurt his friends.

He never imagined how quick she would be, swirling past him and jabbing her fingers into Caleb’s side, sending him staggering with some awful dark arcane force.

Caleb coughed, and Molly saw red. Red blood, red anger, red, red, red.

This was all his fault.

All his fault.

Molly used his one teleport of the day to warp across their impromptu battlefield, determined to get in her face, to distract her from Caleb. He took a swipe at her with the scimitar, glistening with ice crystals. But she just waved a hand up in front of him, and he bounced off a wall of force instead of getting a hit in.

Luckily that gave Caleb an opening.

A blast of arcane force tore into DeRogna’s chest from behind Molly, leaving her heaving. But now she turned to Caleb yet again, who was busy cursing behind Molly that the blow should have killed her.

“Lucky shot. Try to counter this one,” she said, a manic gleam in her eye as she cast a spell at Mollymauk instead of Caleb. Molly didn’t realize what was happening until it was too late, too distracted by Caleb. He was bleeding from… from everywhere. It was like when Molly cast blindness, but worse, his whole face tinged with red and making him look like he might collapse at any second.

Molly felt the spell wash over him, a prickle of arcane energy locking him in place, eyes wide as he heard a voice in his head.

_Why don’t you go attack your pretty pet wizard? Don’t stop until he’s dead._

He faltered, turning around completely and moving towards Caleb, with Vess at his heels. Every step felt like agony, but his body was pliant for her commands. Locked away somewhere in his unconscious, he was screaming at himself to stop, but his sword gleamed with ice crystals that caught the sun and he continued to rush towards Caleb.

Caleb who was already _covered_ in his own blood, who looked like a strong breeze might be the end of him.

DeRogna’s magic felt different than Caleb’s. Where his was all woodsmoke and invigorating power and soft herbs and spices, hers was sickeningly sweet, cloying and heavy. It filled his lungs like bad incense and he thought he might choke on it.

He could feel Caleb’s ire deep in his soul. He could see the look of pain on his face, under all the blood. Molly wasn’t sure how his own face looked. Was it empty? Was it as pained as he felt? Had she twisted it into some awful smile? He couldn’t tell. He didn’t want to. The ground began to shake as Vess goaded him on further, sending him racing across the cobblestones.

The sky above them darkened and huge orbs of fire tumbled down and slammed into the archmage behind him. At least, that’s what he assumed happened, since he saw a few of the other mages get consumed in huge spheres of flame, leaving him free to move as he pleased. He faltered in his steps, turning back towards DeRogna.

And then Vess was on fire, screaming bloody murder. Molly tried to figure out exactly what was going on, seeing many of the other mages that had surrounded them caught in a similar blast, screaming and fire all around him.

It was all pretty clear when Molly saw Caleb. He was swaying on his feet, a glassy look in his eye now that the fury had faded, and Molly didn't think twice about rushing to his side. There were a few other mages that had gotten cornered in the middle of the square, but most had teleported away after that. Those that remained had chosen to go down with the rot in the Cerberus Assembly, and the Nein were more than willing to cut it out for them. 

Molly wasn't concerned with that, just running to Caleb. He’d fallen to his knees, holding his hands up over his ears as the sounds of DeRogna and the other mages screamed in the flames began to die out. Just holding him for a moment and waiting until there was quiet, Molly leaned down and took Caleb’s face into his hands. He kissed his forehead gently, ignoring the blood for now. “Just look at me, okay?” he mumbled, tipping up Caleb's chin so the wizard had to meet his gaze and look away from the pyres. "Thank you. You saved me."

He blinked a few times, blue eyes filling with a bit more life, despite how bloodshot they still looked. "I… I'm glad. Are you hurt?"

"Nothing I haven't seen before," he said, unable to stop a slow smile from creeping up. "Thanks to you."

“Gut… We should… put out the fires,” he murmured, looking around again at the piles of ashen bodies and the slowly smouldering carts left behind in the square. “I never should have used that spell, not in town-”

“Hey, it’s okay, you were just trying to help. As far as I can see you got a bunch of mages who were trying to kill us, and maybe a cart. Or seven. We’ll find who they belonged to and pay them for it.”

Caleb trembled a bit, standing up, “Ja. In Ordnung.”

Molly did his best to clean some of the blood away before releasing his face to hold Caleb’s hand. “Let’s see if the other’s need help, yeah? I bet we can get Fjord or Jester to make some rain.”

“Rain,” Caleb murmured, nodding slowly. “Rain would be good.”

He tried taking a step and collapsed again, all the blood that Molly had cleaned away returning again. Molly caught him, looking panicked over at the spot where DeRogna had gone down in smoke. There was a pile of ashes, not a sentient creature that could be causing this damage.

“Caleb? Do you need a potion? Do you have one in your coat?” Molly asked, trying to remain the calm one in this situation and feeling like failure was imminent. The others were still fighting around them and Caleb looked...not great. Not like anything he wanted to dwell on.

Caleb patted his coat pocket, stopping to cough again and only producing more blood.

Molly pulled open Caleb’s coat and grabbed the potion, uncorking it for him. “What hurts? Should I get Jester? This looks… not good.”

He nodded, a little bit of color coming back to his face after taking the potion, but still looking woozy. “She should not have… have had that spell. I feel… weak. We need to inspect the body. Perhaps it was in her wand.”

“What spell?” Molly asked, trying to help Caleb to his feet again and just giving up and starting to carry him. It was easier with Caleb conscious, able to hold on around his neck.

He grabbed a small pack of tissues out of one of his many pockets and wiped some of the blood away, only to cough up more. “Contagion, I think. It has been a long time since I looked at any nature or divine spells. Could have been called Contagious or even just Disease or something. It’s not deadly, but it would last a week untreated if I recall correctly. I’d probably need a lot of iron supplements,” he mumbled, wincing as they walked by a pile of still smoking ash and closing his eyes. He looked like he wanted to hide in Molly’s side, but stopped halfway, afraid to spread the blood around and ending up just looking miserable.

“Jester and Cad can cure diseases though, right?” Molly asked, doing his best to rub his thumb soothingly along Caleb’s arm. He couldn’t imagine a week of Caleb feeling like he couldn’t reach out for comfort.

“Ja, one of them should be able to fix this. I know it’s quite gruesome, I am sorry you have to see it.”

“Of all people, you know I’m the best with blood,” Molly said, shrugging as well as he could while carrying Caleb. Of course that was true, and he knew everything about blood and wasn’t squeamish at all. But the fact that this was Caleb’s blood, that he was _still_ bleeding, that Molly couldn’t do anything to stop it, not even with all his blood magic, was eating him slowly. What good was blood magic when you couldn't stop the person you loved from bleeding?

Caleb nodded, offering up a pained smile. “I’m still sorry. It would probably be best to see Caduceus or Jester before anyone else-”

“CALEB!”

He winced at Veth’s shriek as they emerged from behind the food truck, looking to Molly with a very apologetic face. Molly tried to nod, to make some show that it was okay, but he was still consumed in his own guilt.

“You let this happen to him?” she shrieked, pointing a finger at Molly and voicing all of his inner turmoil like no one else could. Sometimes her lack of tact could cut straight to the bone.

Caleb was trying to talk her down, but the fact that he was conscious and talking rationally didn’t seem to do much for her mood. “Schatz, I’m fine; it’s a disease spell. It looks much worse than it is-”

“You did this. This is your fault. You and your past and-and your people-you did this-” she said, glaring into Molly like daggers and he felt the weight of each word.

She was right. He’d spent so long trying to protect Caleb he hadn’t seen what a danger his hidden past had really been.

Before he could spiral, Caleb spoke with more force that Molly was sure he’d ever heard. _“No._ Nott, Veth, you do _not_ get to do that, not now, not to Mollymauk. Vess DeRogna did this, you can go spit in her ashes. Take your anger where it belongs.”

Veth’s glare faltered as she looked at Caleb’s furious, blood soaked face. “But Caleb-”

“Go calm down, ja? The bodies still need to be inspected. The wand that did this is still over there.”

“I-” she looked as though she might protest, but stopped. “Alright. I’m sorry, Caleb.”

“I’m not the one to apologize to,” he mumbled, wiping blood off his face again with his now sopping tissue.

Molly couldn’t help but to feel like she was right, but Caleb sounded like she’d done this before. That didn’t matter though. What matter was getting Caleb to a fucking healer.

“Jester! Cad! A little help!” Molly called out, wincing at how his voice had gotten a bit hoarse. He sounded like he was about to burst into tears.

Jester ran over, a potion in her hand, “Holy shit, Caleb, do you need this last potion? Is he conscious?”

“Diseased, he said,” Molly shook his head. “The potion couldn’t hurt, though. He’s losing blood.”

Caleb nodded in confirmation, not speaking and looking paler by the second. He was already so pale, Molly was starting to worry he’d never see his favorite blush again.

“Fuck,” she breathed, eyes wide. “I… I don’t have any lower level spells left. I had to dispel the suggestion on all these people that looked like Caleb. Caduceus might have something, or I can burn something stronger.”

“It’s not life threatening, if you’d like to wait until tomorrow,” Caleb said, though his voice was quieter now. It sounded like the disease was slowly leeching the life away from him.

Molly shook his head, “No, we can use a strong spell for this. We’ll just… we’ll just go somewhere and rest after, right?”

Jester nodded, “Let me get Caduceus. I’ll be right back, okay, Caleb?”

“I’m really fine, Jest- And she’s gone.”

“You don’t look fine, Caleb.” Molly murmured, getting to the fountain and sitting on the pavement with Caleb still in his arms. Now Caleb was just in his lap, and he could lean against the wall of the fountain. Once again, Caleb moved to lean against Molly and then thought better of it, sitting rigidly and trying not to touch anything. “Oh, for the love of the gods, I’m wearing black. Come here,” Molly finally said, pulling Caleb closer and situating them so that Caleb’s head could rest against his shoulder.

He sighed softly with relief, closing his eyes and just staying close. “I really do feel alright. Just weak. I’ll cast the tower, or teleport us home, and we can relax. Whatever everyone else wants to do.”

“I mean, we were going home tomorrow anyways,” Molly said, looking around at the wrecked town square and Fjord trying to fix things with little rain showers while Beau talked to some Crownsguard about what happened. She was flashing her Cobalt Soul ID, but they might need to talk with people before they left. He really didn’t want to do that.

Jester came back with Caduceus then, interrupting them before any decisions were made.

Caduceus crouched down to look at Caleb. “Oh man, that’s a nasty spell. Don’t use it myself, too weird.”

“Definitely not a fan either,” Caleb said softly. “Do you have a restoration left to spare? It’s okay if not-”

But Caduceus was already rubbing the blood on Caleb's forehead away and speaking his divine words, the soft, musty smell of forest undergrowth and lichen filling the industrial town square for a moment before the spell took hold. Caleb’s shoulders slumped as the pain left and he grabbed a new tissue to attempt to get more of the blood off.

Veth had wandered back, looking sheepish now and gently taking the tissue from him, dipping it in the fountain, and cleaning his cheeks. “I’m very sorry, Mollymauk. I wasn’t being fair to you. It’s no more your fault that DeRogna was after you than it was when it was Ikithon after Caleb. I shouldn’t have said what I said.” She didn't meet his eyes until the very end, focused on cleaning the blood of their favorite wizard.

“I understand. All’s forgiven,” Molly said, ruffling her hair and wiping a smear of soot away from her cheek. She offered a sad smile, most of the rage burned away.

Veth looked at Caleb imploringly, eyes looking enough like a kicked puppy that even Molly would have hugged her. And Caleb did, pulling her close and petting her hair. “I forgive you, of course. Even though you didn’t need my forgiveness.”

“I always do. And I got you something too. DeRogna had a book. Well, an unbound book. It looks like a diary. Not trapped, definitely magic,” she pulled back and handed it to him.

Caleb’s eyes flashed as he fumbled with a pinch of salt and soot from his component pouch, and then they went wide, looking to Veth in excitement, then Molly. “This is what I’ve been looking for. The missing puzzle piece to stop your dreams."


	99. The Book

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The aftermath! More Dead Mages! The beginnings of research!

1/24/2021

### Chapter 99: The Book

Somehow, Beau had used her pull with the Cobalt Soul to encourage the monks to investigate what had happened with the rogue Cerberus Assembly members in Hupperdook instead of the Crownsguard. Her status with them, and Molly managing to find a short video posted online of a kid doing a backflip on an enchanted floating hoverboard that clearly showed the beginning of the fight and DeRogna making the first moves against them, were enough to allow them to leave.

Video evidence was quickly becoming one of Caleb’s greatest friends. Especially since the Mighty Nein were definitely more like family these days.

Beau and Fjord decided to stay and talk with the monks from the Cobalt Soul, leaving the rest of them to make their way back to their small hotel room. Caleb still had some decent spells left, having saved the tower and his teleport spells just in case the battle started to look grim.

Other than the blood now drying in his sweater and the weakness in his steps, it hadn’t been that bad. He’d been expecting worse, to be perfectly honest. All these archmages underestimating them and going mad with power were allowing him to cut out more rot from the Cerberus Assembly than he’d ever hoped when he settled with Veth in Nicodranas. The day could have ended much, much worse.

But when he stumbled while walking for a third time and Molly attempted to carry him yet again, Yasha had intervened and scooped him up. Caleb grumbled in her arms about just needing some iron supplements and a good night’s sleep; however it was no use. Yasha had made up her mind, and at least with her carrying him, Molly couldn’t fret. Veth too, though he was still upset with snapping at Molly.

He knew it was just from undirected anger, but he’d felt the sting of it before and had agonized over it for months. Sometimes she didn’t realize how painful her words could be. Mollymauk didn’t deserve that. It was hard to remember that Caleb hadn’t either, but he supposed this was a start.

Mostly he was fascinated with the books in his arms.

Veth had gotten the books from DeRogna’s corpse. Of course there was her spellbook, magically protected from arcane flames just as his own was. The other two were also both completely untouched, despite looking like completely innocuous research notes. He flipped aimlessly through DeRogna’s research journal while they walked, since it seemed like Yasha was intent on carrying him all the way back to their hotel.

But the real prize was the collection of notes written in what Beau had quickly identified as Undercommon. He’d focus on those when he was dealing with less blood loss, but from the look of them, they were exactly what he was searching for to help with Molly’s ties to this horrific city.

Not that her spellbook was anything to sneeze at, but the fact that Vess was delving into any kind of necromancy she could get her hands on made him less than enthused to peruse the book. She was powerful, but many of the spells just made his stomach turn at the thought. Caleb would stick to his fire and his research.

No, for now, the thought of a new breakthrough in his research was what kept him standing, more literally than he was willing to admit.

Caleb cast the modified mansion spell, enjoying the welcome appearance of the door to his tower and ushering everyone inside. Fjord and Beau knew they could text when they got back and he would make the door visible again so they could join them. Having everyone under his magical protection and knowing his mansion would protect them unless dispelled was very comforting.

He was also very excited to show them what he’d thought up in the Great Hall.

Once everyone had cleaned up a bit, Molly had been _very_ eager to get all the blood off of Caleb, they convened in front of the doors that could open to anything. Caleb swung them open to reveal a copy of _The Dead Mage,_ complete with Ikithon and DeRogna on the menu and large cats behind the counter. A vast array of greasy bar food was already sitting at their table, and Caleb was ready to devour everything with gusto. His body felt like it’d depleted every resource it had, and was begging for him to replenish. It was like he was back on the streets again, starving and ready to eat like a bear fresh out of hibernation.

And since the restaurant was his own recreation, he could play the songs Jester and Molly had picked from the jukebox last time, make sure the countertops weren’t sticky, and avoid any other patrons. He’d made the chairs a little more comfortable and had made sure that Yasha, Caduceus, and Veth all had seating that suited their heights.

He was rather proud of it all, able to smile softly as Jester and Veth ran exploring, checking to see what he’d changed like a child’s puzzle. Molly beelined to the bar, ordering drinks for everyone and Yasha and Caduceus escorted Caleb to a table.

“Please eat something before you decide if you’d like to drink, Mr. Caleb.” Caduceus rubbed his shoulder with a soft frown. “You’ll have a lower tolerance than usual tonight, even with all your Zemnian heritage.”

“Danke, Caduceus. I’m more hungry than anything else,” he mumbled, partly because it was true, and partly because he was still a bit uncomfortable with everyone worrying about him. “I just didn’t want Jester to miss out on visiting somewhere fun.”

Caduceus nodded, looking as Jester and Veth were dissecting the bathroom for differences (nothing was sticky, there was extra toilet paper, there was a small stool for shorter folks next to the sink, and the mirror was clean instead of water stained). “I think that was very successful, Mr. Caleb.”

“So long as Molly doesn’t drink himself into oblivion,” Yasha said softly, watching the tiefling in question coming to the tables with a whole tray full of drinks.

Caduceus and Caleb both made a soft sound of agreement to watch out for him, just as Molly made it to the table. “Come on, I know that look. These are for everyone. I got sodas for Jester and Cad, and the cocktails you and I had last time, Yash. Caleb, I got you an Ikithon, just for kicks, but you have to eat and drink this glass of water first.”

Molly handed them all out, rolling his eyes at the protective look they were giving him. “We’ll talk about everything later. I’m safe, you’re all safe, and I just want to have a good last night in Hupperdook. Time for all that bullshit later.”

The rest assented as Jester and Veth came back, clambering up onto the newly redesigned chairs and grabbing what Molly had brought for her. Caleb caught another apologetic look sent Molly’s way from Veth, but didn’t point it out. At least she knew she was wrong.

Caleb got the text from Beau then, thrown into the group chat for some reason, so all their phones buzzed in unison.

> **Beauregard:** let us in assholes
> 
> **Fjord:** Caleb, you can just make the door visible.  
>  **Fjord:** No need to come all the way down here yourself
> 
> **Caleb:** It should be visible now. You two are free to enter, and I’ll make it invisible again.
> 
> **Jester:** Meet us in the great dining hall!!
> 
> **Caleb:** Just because we have all our meals here doesn’t mean it’s solely a dining hall. You can imagine anything and summon it from the doors.
> 
> **Jester:** …  
>  **Jester:** Meet us in the dining hall :/  
>  **Jester:** We’re in the room with the open door  
>  **Jester:** Also Beau you didn’t see but I rolled my eyes at Caleb just like you taught me
> 
> **Fjord:** On our way inside.
> 
> **Beauregard:** proud of you jes  
> 

Beau seemed to have the same appetite as Caleb after a long fight, taking a pat on the back imbued with a little extra healing as she sat next to Yasha and grabbed an entire plate of bacon cheeseburger sliders. Veth was detailing all the alcohol options to her while eating fried pickles, and Fjord was carefully trying to pick something he liked from the bar. The murky black cocktail he’d ordered was the Vess DeRogna that Caleb had invented, black like necromancy but sickly sweet like her diplomatic air.

Everyone was laughing and most of the tension from the afternoon had faded by the time Molly scooted his chair closer to Caleb’s and rested his head on Caleb’s shoulder.

Caleb loved when he did that because it was the perfect angle for him to lean over and kiss Molly’s forehead. “You need Fritz to get you a glass of water, Liebling?” he asked softly, cleaning his hands on a napkin before pushing back his empty plate and grabbing some garlic fries that he could eat with one hand. The now freed hand found its way into Molly’s soft curls, winding gently and keeping him close.

“Not drunk. Just buzzed and exhausted,” Molly said, muffled through a mouthful of the fries Caleb had pulled over.

Humming and just buzzed enough to not care about his friends being there, Caleb turned and kissed the crown of Molly’s head then. He let his fingers wander, eventually fiddling with the chain around Molly’s neck. His chain.

“Oh, you want this back now? Guess you took care of my DeRogna problem,” he mumbled, raising the cocktail in his hand like a cheer to her demise.

Caleb frowned at the thought. “I don’t need it, in a more final way than you perhaps. You look better in it anyways.”

“Agree to disagree, love. I miss seeing you in jewelry sometimes.” Molly put down his drink and exchanged it for the water someone had placed near them (there was no telling which one of the healers or mom friends it was).

He watched Molly take a sip as he played with the chain again. Caleb did miss having something to fiddle with occasionally. “You’ll have to pick something out for me. You have good taste for that kind of thing.”

“True. But if you do want this one back, you can always ask. I’m sure Pumat would make us another one.”

Caleb fought his blush and tried to remind himself that this was okay. Molly loved him and wouldn’t mind hearing his thoughts. Still, it was hard to put his feelings to words. “I… I sort of like you wearing it. Something of mine, I mean.”

“Oh,” Molly said softly, beginning to pull away to look at Caleb.

Instantly regretting saying anything, he backtracked, stumbling over his words even more. “If… If that makes you uncomfortable, or you really hate it, I understand-”

“I just thought it was sweet. You like it when I wear something that shows I’m yours?” Molly asked, his chin now resting on Caleb’s shoulder as those red eyes looked right through him.

Swallowing the lump in his throat and blaming the deep flush in his cheeks on the alcohol, Caleb nodded. “I… Ja. I do.”

Molly was about to say something more when his phone buzzed in his pocket that was currently up against Caleb’s leg, startling Caleb so much that he bumped into his horn. Beau was snorting across the table, clearly very pleased with the turn of events.

Pulling out his phone and looking at the text, Molly scoffed and started throwing fried pickles at Beau’s head.

Caleb peered over to see the text just as Beau caught one in her hand and another in her mouth, talking with her mouth full and saying, “Bring it, Tealeaf!”

> **Beau:** an entire magical castle and u cant find a room to make moon eyes at your wizard?
> 
> **Molly:** Fuck you too
> 
> **Beau:** u look exhausted dude  
>  **Beau:** go to bed  
> 

Caleb could see things winding down, other than the food fight, with Caduceus and Yasha yawning and discussing whether or not it was truly contagious. Veth was participating in the food fight but looked like she might fall asleep midway through flinging mashed potatoes. And Fjord was using the fight as an excuse to retire.

So Caleb didn’t really feel all too self conscious grabbing Molly’s hand and dragging him away. He really did look exhausted.

Caleb laughed at Fjord loudly declaring, “Up!” And followed him with Molly in tow, grinning at the super hero pose Molly adopted to copy Fjord on their way up to their bedroom.

Caleb settled down into the bed he and Molly shared, making a contented sound as Molly curled close and began to pet his hair. It was soft and gentle, and he knew they wouldn't be doing much else but providing comfort for each other tonight. Caleb nuzzled close and grabbed the first book off the stack by the side of the bed. He pulled out DeRogna’s personal notes and began to read, keeping an eye on the other book on the desk in the room. It called out to him; he was sure it was the missing link, but he needed to make sure that DeRogna wasn’t hiding any other secrets first.

There’d be time for that later.


	100. The Eyes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> really long chapter today lol
> 
> (we made it to 100 chapters holy shit.....)

### Chapter 100: The Eyes

Molly ended up attached to normalcy, in a way he never thought he would.

There was something lovely about the way he could go through a week with the stability of knowing that Caelb would be home when he came back from work. The way he would groan being woken up by Molly’s alarm, and be pacified with a quick kiss as Molly got ready. Their weekly movie nights with the rest of the Mighty Nein. His daily stop into _Jester and Veth’s Divine Delights_ for whatever strange concoction one of the girls cooked up for him and called coffee. His trips to Caduceus’ for tea. Babysitting Luc once a month with Caleb so Yeza and Veth could have a date night. The weekly ladies’ nights that he’d been perpetually invited to, the lunches with Yasha, the odd training session with Beau, or movie with Fjord.

It was turning into a routine that Molly was very comfortable with.

He never thought about enjoying something like this. His life had always been so tumultuous, and he’d enjoyed it plenty, but he’d never known anything else.

And there was some sort of quiet satisfaction growing as Caleb discovered more about his past self, allowing him to Caleb deal with it quietly, at his own pace. It was different from the staunch fear that he would be recognized in the street. With Caleb quietly filtering all of DeRogna’s notes, he was allowed time to process everything, safe in their apartment and with as much comfort food and as many cuddles as he could ask for.

It was more than he could have ever imagined. And he’d always expected to be recognized eventually. Or for some of his past self’s memories to come back.

But with every day Caleb spent with DeRogna’s journal, he found out more about Molly’s past self, and explained it carefully, when Molly was feeling up to it. Who Lucien was, where Vess had found him, her fascination with him as the Nonagon and the Eyes of Nine, how she desperately wanted to steal the book from him. They could discuss it with distance, with Caleb more than aware that Molly had nothing to do with this ridiculous cult. It was more like discussing an estranged cousin who made terrible choices that affected the rest of their family than anything else. No one was really sorry they were dead, and it was just a question of picking up the pieces they left behind.

He just wished this “Lucien” hadn’t left so many pieces with jagged edges lying around.

Caleb had read the last few entries first to make sure she had no bigger plans to stop Molly that could still hurt them, then went back to the beginning. She hadn’t known everything about this “Lucien,” but she knew a fair deal, and seemed to obsess over both him and the city. He seemed to be “chosen” on some level that she was not, though she could not figure out why.

Then there was the other book.

It was sitting on Caleb’s desk, pulsing with magic and the worst vibes Molly had ever felt from a magical object, or a magical person for that matter, including getting magically controlled by DeRogna. Luckily, Caleb was distracted by the other two for now, but the wizard’s excitement over the other tome worried him.

Once he finished copying the spells he wanted from DeRogna’s spellbook, he’d be moving on to that one. Molly couldn’t help the sense of dread growing in him whenever he thought about Caleb reading that book. It wasn’t founded in anything, and Caleb was so excited about finally getting to find some answers about Molly’s connection to the city, so he couldn’t stop him.

He was grateful for it, really. It sounded outlandish for someone to be doing hours of research for him. It felt as though someone was doing all his homework for him, not that he ever actually went to school. Quite frankly, it still felt like a miracle that Caleb tolerated his uneducated bullshit.

They made quite the pair, if he ever sat down and thought about it.

No one would really look at them and believe they were perfect for each other, but the fact that the worst looming dangers seemed to be over was very clarifying in some senses. It wasn’t just that Molly loved Caleb, to the ends of the earth and back, but that he never wanted this soft domesticity to end. That was a difficult subject to broach when there was an evil city trying to use his body as some kind of vessel, so for now he kept the thoughts inside, instead planning for Winter’s Crest and the movie night upcoming at their place.

He was planning on cooking something for everyone, inspired by _The Great Marquesian Baking Show,_ and had been experimenting with the recipe for the past week to make sure it was ready when everyone came over. It was simple, his own rolls and baked mac and cheese, but he’d been perfecting the seasonings and was almost completely happy with them. Today he was experimenting with adding some spinach and mushrooms into the rolls, mostly to trick Jester into eating vegetables. They were getting a little worried about how much of her diet was just pastries.

That and Caleb was diligently not letting any of the experimental casseroles or rolls go to waste, a product of him never having the time to prepare his own food and having spent part of his life without enough food. If he could sneak either of the two of them some vegetables, he’d call it a win for the day.

Molly set the dough aside to rise just as he got a text from Beau.

> **Beau:** hey asshole  
>  **Beau:** you wanna train?  
>  **Beau:** yash’s busy
> 
> **Molly:** Good afternoon to you too  
>  **Molly:** Let me see if Caleb could set up the tower  
>  **Molly:** I don’t really want to go to a gym
> 
> **Beau:** im coming over regardless  
>  **Beau:** bored
> 
> **Molly:** Your unpleasantness is always welcome, dear  
> 

“Caleb, love?” Molly asked, peeking his head out of the kitchenette to see Caleb’s work sprawled across their table so he could stay close. Turning his music down now that he wasn’t covered in flour, Molly leaned against the wall to see what he was working on.

Caleb looked up from his notes, DeRogna’s spellbook open on the table and the horrible tome sitting nearby, waiting.

He’d moved it.

“Ja, Liebling?” he asked, accent thick as he spoke for the first time in hours.

Molly chewed his lip. His icky feelings about the book were completely unfounded. Caleb was trying to help. He pushed all the bad thoughts down and asked, “Beau wanted to train and I don’t want to go to the gym. Would you be willing to set up the tower for tonight?

“Of course,” Caleb said, smiling softly at the request. He liked using his magic for other people, Molly had found. It was hard to draw the line with him having so much to spare and folks taking advantage of him, but Molly never felt too bad about asking for the tower. Caleb was adding to it constantly and loved to show off the new additions.

Before long the door to the tower was standing in the hallway next to the closet, and Beau was pounding on the door of their apartment.

Caleb picked up a piece of string and a small woodchip, then the door flew open, all without him looking up from Vess’s spellbook. He was definitely feeling magical today.

Molly kissed him on the crown of the head and whispered something in his ear as Beau walked in and ditched her coat and shoes. A grin took over Caleb’s face and he nodded, sending his unseen servant to tap Beau on the shoulder.

“What the-” she whirled and kicked the air, the servant dispelled in a poof.

“Aw, you killed Schmidt,” Caleb frowned, a mischievous glint still in his eye.

Beau rolled her eyes and tapped Caleb on the head with her staff. “I’m here to fight Molly, not you. Don’t test me.” 

Molly rolled his eyes right back at her, leading her into the tower and pulling open the doors in the Great Salon to the gym he’d thought up with Beau the last time they went to the gym and had both gotten catcalled within two seconds of leaving the building covered in sweat. He’d been too tired to fight the guy, but Beau made sure he learned his goddamn lesson, in the form of a black eye and stunning him for long enough to properly freak him out and call them both witches.

Of course Molly looked the part of which perfectly, even without trying to look creepy.

It had been an amusing moment, really, but he much preferred relaxing in Caleb’s tower with no leering eyes. They could really cut loose here too.

Neither of them had healing magic, but they knew their limits and they knew not to bruise anywhere noticeable. If they really had some bad ones, they’d get coffee later and ask Jester to pump a little healing magic into them, for sore muscles.

Probably not the best or most truthful way to do things, but it was cathartic to whirl around the mat with Beau and her staff. For all they’d butt heads in the beginning, they were more similar than not. Nasty pasts that they had no desire to fix or talk about, abandonment issues, some minor drug problems, and both abrasive and full of bullshit.

With her he could cut loose and use the full extent of his powers, without worrying about breaking her or her breaking him. She could be brutal, but he was getting better at resisting her stuns. And she had every right to stun him when he was allowed to blind her or use his ice magic to make his staff land with enough pressure to match her blows. Beau maintained that the ice felt nice, like someone slamming an icepack into her while they were sparring.

“You ready to talk about Vess DeRogna yet?” she asked, slamming her staff into his back as he left enough of an opening for her to whirl behind him.

He cursed, making sure to do so in Infernal and making her eyes bleed but not quite blinding her. “The fuck do you care?”

“Don’t be a prick, Tealeaf,” she warned, ducking below a swing of his staff that still glistened with ice in the lights of the training room. “I just want to know what the hell happened.”

“She knew who was in this body before me. She wasn’t a fan.” He spoke in simple sentences, mostly focused on rolling out of the way of her next set of blows and looking for another opening.

Beau got in one lucky shot, but immediately was caught by two of his own. “I gathered that much. You know I can read lips, right? What the fuck is a Nonogon?”

“Me,” he groaned, cursing in Infernal again and succeeding in blinding her as she hopped back up, causing her to stumble a bit.

“And what does that mean?” Beau asked, undeterred by the blood streaming down her face and the way Molly was sneaking towards her.

Even with her being blind, she got in a hit on him again, but not without leaving herself overextended. Molly pinned her to the mat with his cold staff, sighing softly and lifting her curse so she could see. “Some ancient entity wants me to be a vessel. It’s eldritch and terrifying and Caleb and Caduceus are doing their best to deal with it.”

She blinked the blood away from her eyes. “Huh. Like Fjord’s thing?”

“Does Fjord’s old patron want to possess him and summon a demonic city to the material plane?” Molly grumbled, stepping back and letting her right herself before lunging forward again.

Beau snorted and deflected his blow with her staff easily. “Yes. As far as we can tell. Hopefully we can destroy the things that summon it and call it a day.”

“I don’t know exactly what summons it. Caleb’s learning it from DeRogna’s notes, but I’m worried for him. This is bigger than he should have to deal with.” Molly flattened himself to the floor to avoid another flurry of blows from Beau, rolling away and leaping back up.

But he fumbled as he landed, getting hit right in the back by one and ending up stunned. Beau stalked around him like a big cat looking down its prey, but the expression on her face was mostly just annoyed. “You really think Caleb is irritated that he can help his partner deal with his past by researching stuff? If the only way to help Yasha was a fist fight, I mean I’d be pissed that she had to deal with it, but over the moon that I could help.”

She let him have some space so he could surge towards her and the room was consumed with the therapeutic sound of wooden staffs slamming into each other as they whirled around, looking for an opening.

“Think about it though,” she said with a quick dirty kick to the back of Molly’s knee that he countered with a slam of his elbow to her solar plexus, knocking the air out of her. She coughed a moment before continuing, undeterred. “If the only way to take down Ikithon had been with blood magic, wouldn’t you have been kind of satisfied?”

Molly huffed, partly from her logic, and partly from the resounding thwack to his gut. He held up a hand to stop her, catching his breath and wiping the sweat from his brow. Cats appeared as soon as they paused, balancing trays of cool water that was dripping with condensation and smoothies.

“You have a point,” he sighed, catching the water bottle Beau threw at him with ease.

She rolled her eyes, and Molly bit his tongue on a retort about them staying that way. “Of course I do. I can take a look at it all if you’re really worried about our resident crazy ass wizard. He does work himself too hard sometimes.” 

“Yeah, yeah. He’s working with Cad sometimes, but I might take you up on that later.” He finished up what he wanted of the smoothie, knowing it would disappear once they stepped out of the tower.

Beau took hers through the levitating place, sipping it carefully. “Thanks for blowing off steam with me. Sorry I’m a prying asshole.”

“It’s fine, I did need to vent about it with someone who wasn’t going to treat me like I’m made of glass.” Molly ran a hand through his hair, thinking about a cold shower and his rolls that would now be risen enough to put in the oven.

She nodded, punching him in the arm hard enough for him to almost feel like they were still training. “Anytime, Molly. I’ll see you around.”

Instead of punching her back, he just let her walk out the door of the tower and watch her smoothie disappear. “Bye bye, dumbass. Come beat me up again sometime.”

Caleb was hunched over the table still, not acknowledging them even coming out into the hallway. Seeing the look on Molly’s face, Beau frowned and knocked Caleb on the head with her staff again. “Hey, Widogast. Don’t forget to eat and sleep, yeah?”

He blinked up at her, looking a bit dazed, “Ja, ja. I’m fine, Beauregard.”

“Whatever, dude. Don’t make Molly feel crummy by not taking care of yourself,” she said, packing up her stuff and throwing her coat back on. “Bye, guys!”

Molly waved and ruffled Caleb’s hair as he walked by. “I’m gonna take a shower, but dinner should be ready in like half an hour. I’ll make you some tea too.”

He smiled up at Molly, nodding, then looking back to the book on the table. “The translation spell should run out about then anyway.”

Caleb looked to the book, and then his notes, scrawled in what Molly had come to recognize as Zemnian. But that wasn’t what made him worry. It was the book.

Caleb was reading the book.

It just looked like normal notes, collected at the beginning. No reason for Molly to worry.

Still, he resolved to take his shower very quickly, throwing the rolls in the oven first and coming back out as soon as he could to bustle in the kitchen and keep an eye out. After a while he was making excuses to come out into the living room. He would emerge to scratch Frumpkin, then to water the plants, then to bring Caleb a mug of tea.

He didn’t seem to notice as Molly set it down, but that wasn’t out of the ordinary.

Caleb flipped the page as Molly peered over his shoulder with his own mug of tea. Caleb frowned at the newly revealed entry, cocking his head to one side. Worrying at his lip, Molly moved a bit closer and tried to see what was wrong.

His expression had clouded with dazed confusion, lost in a page that was mostly just scribbles and scratches. He didn’t just look lost in translation or a difficult word, like he sometimes did while doing research. Molly had gotten used to that look over the time they’d spent together. That was adorable, with his furrowed brow and intense concentration. This was terrifying, a blankness consuming him, like the pages themselves had dazed him. Molly’s stomach turned so badly he thought he might retch on the spot.

Caleb couldn’t keep reading that book. Molly had never felt so strongly about anything in his entire life. Normally he trusted his instincts, and every fiber of his being wanted Caleb to stop. He looked _empty._

“Don’t-Don’t read that!” Molly snapped, snatching all the papers away and looking at Caleb with deep panic in his eyes.

Caleb blinked at him. He was still dazed and looked hurt that the papers were taken away, reaching out for them in an aborted, halfhearted motion.

Molly’s heart lurched uncomfortably in his chest. He still looked empty.


	101. The Dreamers

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Molly is rightfully worried, but Caleb is mostly just worried about Winter's Crest

### Chapter 101: The Dreamers

“Don’t read that!” Molly snapped, snatching the book on the Nine Eyes away.

It took Caleb a moment to focus on the real world again, watching Molly in confusion. He wasn’t sure exactly how long he was looking at the book’s scribbles and patterns. Caleb never lost sense of time like that, and he felt completely disoriented. “Was… What? Why?”

Molly looked worried sick, holding the book like it carried the plague. “It’s… not good. Bad vibes, you know? I… I don’t want you to read it.”

Caleb’s brow furrowed, trying to figure out what was going on. His comprehend languages spell had just worn off, but he didn’t remember much of the last few minutes of the past hour. “Do you… remember something?” If Molly was remembering things from his past, that was a whole nother issue to deal with.

“I… No. It’s not like memory,” Molly mumbled, collapsing into the chair beside Caleb with the book safely a few feet away from them both. “It’s like… relearning how to read. Or recognizing a monster. It’s just something I know, but buried. If you read this, something bad will happen.”

Chewing his lip, Caleb nodded and attempted to put some of the scattered puzzle pieces together. “And what might this bad thing be?”

“I don’t know. But I know I don’t want it to happen to you.” He was resolute, worry painted all over his face. Absentmindedly he ran his hand over his tattoos, lingering and scratching at the red eye on his shoulder.

Humming softly, Caleb looked at the mug of tea beside him. When did that get there?

He picked up the mug, taking a small sip. The book was more dangerous than he’d assumed. When he couldn’t find any specific magical trap on it, he just assumed it would be alright to read. 

Caleb looked back up at Molly and caught his hand gently to stop the scratching. “I won’t read those pages then. I think I know everything I’d need from them already. Those patterns don’t make sense, and I think you’re right that people could probably drive themselves insane trying to figure it out.” He looked down at his notebook, full of notes he did remember taking. That was clear enough, just the patterned sections made him feel hazy and lost.

Molly looked relieved at the declaration, sighing softly and shooting a dirty look at the book like it was the cause of this whole mess. For all Caleb knew, maybe it was. “Good. I’ll finish dinner, you clear the table okay? Maybe the book can stay somewhere… not here. For now. I don’t want anyone to read it at movie night either.”

“Would you feel more comfortable if you had it?” Caleb asked, pulling out his chunk of amber on a chain from his component pouch. He hadn’t needed it in a while, but this seemed like a good use. Especially since this way both he and Molly would have to agree to open it again. “You can make sure it’s safe, and if either of us feels like they need to look at it, they’ll have to ask the other. In case its magic can call you to it.”

Caleb didn’t say that it had, even though it felt rather obvious now. No need to worry Molly more, not when the damage had already been done, whatever it was. 

Accepting eagerly and adding another sliver of peace of mind (not to mention another piece of jewelry from Caleb to his person), Molly relaxed a bit and continued setting up their meal. They talked about other things, relaxing further and spending the rest of the evening in the tower for dessert and a movie in the small theater Molly had thought up. It was mostly just a big pile of pillows and blankets in front of a projector, but it was cozy and they had popcorn and ice cream that tasted like it was just off the cart in Blumenthal.

He almost fell asleep there, drained from reading the strange books all day, but Molly roused him and helped him float up to their bedroom as Frumpkin ran around in the passageways as king of the castle. Molly insisted that Caleb have some of the tea that prevented dreams too, and he didn’t have any energy to argue that it was unnecessary. 

Given how prone the two of them were to nightmares, they might as well just make it a routine.

When Molly saw Caleb had slept through the night with no nightmares, he seemed to calm down a little. But Caleb did notice that the amber necklace was another piece that didn’t leave his neck even as he undid all the chains and bobbles in his horns and ears. 

And Caleb noticed in the morning light that he had streaming artificially through the tower, that his anti-divination necklace wasn’t a fluke; he really did like seeing Molly wearing his jewelry.

Slowly, over the next few weeks, Caleb continued to work on the notes of DeRogna and the mage who had gone to Aeor, avoiding the pages Molly had told him not to read and investing in a lead box just in case the amber wasn’t enough. Molly opened up to the rest of the group when they came over for movie night, even though Caleb had told him he didn’t have to.

Molly had shrugged, just saying he owed them an explanation, and that he owed Veth his real name from ages ago. That and heavy things were best talked about while everyone was eating and had an excuse to shut up and not interrupt him. Beau already knowing everything helped with interruptions, but it was still a valid concern.

After that, Caleb was able to work with Beau and Veth, finding everything they could from the Cobalt Soul and their own arcane knowledge. He’d been vague in his true purpose, but had run the idea past Yussa as well, who was very pleased to acquire access to Vess DeRogna’s spellbook. It wasn’t long before Caleb had something impressive enough to present as a Winter’s Crest present. Well, that and the ring.

It wasn’t anything too fancy, and it was really just Caleb testing the waters. The ring had an enchantment on it, which was his excuse for buying it, though he’d had it hand made. But Caleb had noticed despite Molly’s love of jewelry and rings, and disdain for organized government ceremonies, he kept the ring finger on his left hand bare.

This was just a test.

An experiment, really. Something that Caleb excelled at.

If Mollymauk accepted the ring, just as a present for someone who liked rings and needed magical protection (in Caleb’s opinion), and put it on _that_ finger, it meant Caleb would be welcome to ask about more… meaningful jewelry. Nothing about it was concrete, but it was definitely a worthwhile way to test the waters. Caleb had gotten this far with Molly, and was terrified to find the edge where Molly would want to stop. He knew that Molly hadn't ever really done this before, and his late night conversations with Astrid about what their kids might have looked like barely even counted.

He wasn’t good at talking about the future because he just assumed he’d never have one.

But lately he’d been daydreaming about it, and he couldn’t imagine a moment of it without Mollymauk as a significant part of his life. It didn’t matter to him whether or not they stayed in the city or if Molly wanted to travel or retire to the countryside. Caleb had lived just about everywhere, and he was ready to follow Molly wherever he’d let him.

The tricky part was deciding which one to show as his present at their Winter’s Crest party. Since almost everyone had started dating since last year, they had decided to definitely get their partners something, and then one other person. No one really cared that someone knew who everyone else got since they figured out Veth had rigged the Geheime Geschenke last year. And as with anything including math, Caleb was chosen. It was complicated, but since Caleb had examined all the possibilities and was fantastic at keeping secrets, everything was arranged perfectly.

Even if Molly asked him at least once a day who everyone else had.

“C’mon, Caleb, we’ll find out tomorrow, well, today, it’s midnight, why won’t you just tell me-”

Looking over the edge of his book, Caleb deflected instead and asked, “Would you like one of your presents now, since it’s technically Winter’s Crest now?”

Molly’s eyes lit up, all the excitement from someone who had never been able to be a mischievous child shining through. “Can you do that?”

“I used to do it as a teenager, ja.” Caleb nodded and took note to memorize where he stopped reading.

He chewed his lip a moment, “Wait, one of my presents? You got me more than one? That’s not fair-”

“Well, one is something you’re expecting. I wanted to give you a surprise too.” Caleb just shrugged, now working on memorizing the light in Molly’s eyes at the thought of secretly opening presents together in the middle of the night.

Molly looked like he wanted to protest, to be patient and wait, but it was a quickly lost battle. “You know I’m a sucker for surprises.”

“And you know I’m quite good at them. Which would you rather have now? The one you expect, or the surprise?” Caleb sat upright, thinking to Frumpkin to have him head to the massive tree in the Grand Salon downstairs, already prepped for tomorrow. Even though Jester would have been happy to host again, Caleb felt like they probably ought to take turns.

“The surprise,” Molly said, eyes glowing with both excitement and the thousands of fairy lights Caleb had enchanted to hang throughout the tower. There were garlands everywhere and stockings hung over every fireplace, filled with candies and sweets, and an orange at the bottom. Una insisted on putting one at the bottoms of their stockings each year, to remind them of her parents, who were lucky to get one of the imported fruits on the morning of Winter’s Crest.

And it was one of Caleb’s favorite parts, to sit down and eat the segments of his orange alongside the chocolate while he read whatever books his parents had been able to get for him that year. Everything was trussed up in the warm traditional Zemnian colors of green and red with twinkling lights, the whole tower smelled of the balsam trees on every corner alongside almond cookies, and he knew his parents would have loved it.

Soon Frumpkin came bounding in, the small box carried carefully in his mouth by its gold ribbon. It matched all the decorations with its deep red paper and shiny gold bow, a deceptively small box for what it was.

But Molly didn’t seem to care that the box was small, vibrating with excitement and possibly a bit of a residual sugar rush from the amount of whipped cream on his peppermint hot cocoa earlier.

“You know you’re way too sweet,” Molly said, chewing his lip as he carefully pulled off the silk gold ribbon, keeping it and tying a small bow in his hair with it. His purple curls fell over one shoulder now, long enough for him to style it in far too many tantalizing ways.

Caleb just rolled his eyes, staying quiet and watching carefully.

The excitement in Molly’s expression only grew as he found the small velvet box inside, clearly containing jewelry. Then he gasped as he opened it up, holding the ring up to the light. It was a simple gold band, inlaid with three gems. Two faceted garnets laid on either side of a bright red opal that caught the light and shone with fiery oranges and teals depending on how you turned it. It was flashy and colorful and Caleb had thought of Mollymauk as soon as he saw it.

“It’s enchanted. I know we’re probably both going to avoid any battles for now, but it’s helpful to protect you if you don’t want to wear any armor.” Caleb looked it over again, hoping he had chosen correctly, but Molly looked completely enamored.

Molly looked up at him with an even wider grin, “It’s magic too?”

“What else would you expect from me?” Caleb teased, scooting closer. “Try it on?”

Slipping it immediately onto the ring finger of his left hand, Molly pouted. “Shoot. Doesn’t fit there. Oh well.” He fixed it on the ring finger of the other hand twisting around his elegant fingers to watch the gems catch the light.

But Caleb’s heart had lurched into his throat. His experiment was definitely a success as he watched Molly inspect the ring on the other hand. “It’d look better on the other hand without the dumb eye there. Oh well. Maybe I can get one of those magic tattoos Jester’s always talking about to cover it up. This ring wants to be the center of attention almost as much as me.” He paused to kiss Caleb’s cheek, not mentioning how deeply it had flushed. “You should have told me you were getting me two presents. I would have gotten you two presents.”

Caleb just ran his fingers across Molly’s hand, brushing over the new ring. “What if I was cheesy and said you were enough of a present?”

Molly grinned at him wickedly, “Well, then you’d have to unwrap me next.”


	102. Winter's Crest

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's snowing out so... Christmas again. These folks are soft.

### Chapter 102: Winter’s Crest

Molly hadn’t really experienced any traditional Winter's Crest celebrations. Gustav and Desmond and Yasha used to just give him simple presents and enjoy the day off with whatever dumb family movies was on tv.

Caleb’s Zemnian Winter’s Crest looked like something straight out of a holiday movie, garlands of evergreen and little balsam trees dotted throughout the entire tower. Everything was lit by candles that were enchanted not to catch fire and string lights hung on every possible surface. It smelled like home cooking, almond cookies he was told, and it was everything he needed in the dreary Nicodranas rainy season. 

Every fireplace had weird socks hanging from it, all hand knitted with the names of their friends and filled with candy (and an orange at the bottom for some reason? He’d ask Caleb later). Molly listened to Caleb carefully explain the origins of each Zemnian tradition whenever he asked, a soft, nostalgic smile on his face at the old stories. Each stained glass window was enchanted to have snow falling in the panels of glass, and yet again Molly was taken aback by the sheer amount of attention to detail and care Caleb put into every spell he cast for his loved ones.

His present to Molly too, the red opal ring that shone like flames and magic, somehow matched the decor too. He admired how it gleamed in the light of the fireplaces while their friends opened up the presents they’d brought into the tower.

Yasha hadn’t bothered to wrap her present for Molly, just slapping a bow on the unwrapped table. It didn’t need it honestly, a beautiful low table, curved for him to kneel at for tarot readings. It was a pale wood, stained and covered in a glossy sheen of resin, but down the center was a dark, feathering mark across the wood where the tree had been struck by lightning.

He fawned over it while Caleb received his present from Veth, which seemed to be some kind of ring that could store magic spells in it.

Then Caleb came to sit beside him on the couch, examining Yasha’s table and holding an inconspicuous present in his lap. Other than the fact that it was wrapped identically to Molly’s new favorite ring, of course. Caleb complimented Yasha on the lovely craftsmanship of the table, which she’d made herself with part of a tree she found on one of her last journeys out of town.

Molly let them talk for a moment, but he was grateful when Yasha was stolen away by Fjord who was awkwardly shuffling closer with his present for her. He heard Fjord explain how he’d sailed to a tropical island nearby and collected all the flowers he could find there, drying them carefully for her. She looked on the verge of tears and the whole conversation was lovely, but Caleb was already gently placing the second present in his lap.

“Shouldn’t I go first? You already gave me one,” Molly said, already picking off the gold ribbon.

Caleb shook his head. “I’ve been waiting too long already. Go ahead.”

“Fine, fine.” Molly stole a kiss on his cheek before continuing to strip off the wrapping. He knew Caleb’s favorite part was giving the gifts, not getting them. “This is the one I’m supposed to be expecting, right?”

“Ja,” Caleb said, watching as he carefully unwrapped a notebook. “I’ve made a breakthrough for you.”

Molly blinked, looking up at him, and then leafing through what was in the notebook dedicated to everything he had learned about the weird nightmares and eyes. “Yeah?”

“I believe your body was tied to the city in some way, from reading the book that DeRogna had. That’s where the eyes came from.” He pointed out a few important pages, but a lot of it went over Molly’s head. He’d need it all explained.

Molly looked up from the confusing notes, frowning darkly. Not a great start to the present. Caleb probably should have just stuck with the ring. “The bad vibes book? The book you read too? That book?”

“Well, yes. It seemed like the best way to help you at the time, so I took a gamble. Worst case scenario, we’d be dealing with this together. But you were there to stop me from looking at the patterns, which upon completing Vess’s journal were what she got lost staring at for years.” Caleb scratched the back of his head sheepishly. “I was foolish, yes, and very lucky you were there. But I’ve received no strange dreams or eyes, so I think its power is limited to making a deep bodily connection through someone staring at those patterns.”

Molly shifted in his seat, sighing deeply. At least Caleb was no more wrapped up in this mess than when they started. “So, that’s it? I’m just connected to this thing until one of us dies?”

He pointed eagerly to the notes that Molly was hunched over on the plush red couch. “I think we could sever the connection. I think _I_ could do it. Well, I know that I _could_ do it, I just need the right spell. That’s what the present is, silly.”

A weight lifted from his chest. Of course Caleb had figured it out. He was probably the smartest person Molly had ever met. Rising excitement leaked into Molly’s voice, “Really? You could fix… this?” Molly waved a hand to gesture to all the eyes tattooed on his body.

He nodded, getting that enthralled look he sometimes did when talking about magic, “It’s a very powerful spell. Arguably the most powerful spell you can cast. And I think DeRogna had it. It has taken me quite a long time to work through her spellbook alongside her notes and the tome about the Somnovem, but I know if it is the spell I think it is, it will take at least eighteen hours straight of transcription, and 450 gold worth of special ink. It’s not an issue, I just need to find it all. That’s partially why I moved on to just focus on research for you.”

Molly frowned at all the effort Caleb would be going to, down playing his own excitement a bit, even though it was supposed to be a present. “I mean, there’s no gigantic rush. Vess is dead. The nightmares aren’t _that_ bad, with the tea. As long as I know there’s a way to-to sever the link. To end this.”

He shook his head, taking one of Molly’s hands. “I think it should work. That’s why trying it is part of your Winter’s Crest present. Generally it is used to cast spells without any components or casting time restrictions, but even if it has to be a similar version to a spell I know, I think my transmogrification spell for Veth is similar enough.”

“How would that work?” Molly let Caleb squeeze his hand gently, unable to stop the glow in those blue eyes, reflecting fairy lights and the crackling fireplace.

He went on, that fire inside him burning stronger than ever, “Well, we were able to give Veth an entirely new body. With enough power, I think I could give you a new body, one that was entirely your own, though unchanged save the eyes. You could have a body that would be untouched by the Somnovem, and it would hopefully lose its link to you.”

Molly kissed his forehead, unable to stop smiling with Caleb’s excitement. “You’re amazing. And even if it doesn’t work, we’ll be no worse than when we started.”

Caleb nodded once, a little frown growing on his face for a split second before it turned into determination, “There will be risks. There always are. I’ll likely need to rest after the spell is cast, it sounds quite taxing. And I might never be able to cast it again, but if it works it would definitely be worth it.”

There was something Caleb wasn’t saying, but Molly couldn’t exactly parse it out. He decided to leave it alone for now, folding up the notebook and scooching closer to lean on his shoulder and look out at their friends surrounded by a whirlwind of discarded wrapping paper and ribbons. Jester was covered head to toe in sticky bows, grinning like a madman. Molly smiled out at their family and said, “You’ve already gone through this with Veth. I know that we’ll figure it out, or at least make it better. It’s a lovely Winter’s Crest present, dear.”

He smiled out at their family too, pleased with himself and relaxing while he watched everyone give out gifts around them.

“But now, it’s your turn. It’s no groundbreaking magical discovery, but I think it’s nice.” Molly handed over a small box, lovingly wrapped by a clerk who understood the intricacies of folding wrapping paper much better than he ever would.

The jeweler had seen Molly’s interest in the matching jewelry and had instantly started talking about how lovely they’d be for Molly’s spouse, and he just hadn’t corrected them. It gave him a little thrill to have something like this, but he was still a little worried. They were a teeny bit selfish, after all.

The two pendants hung in the box, small and simple, dainty enough to go with anything and not to overwhelm any other jewelry. A sun and a moon.

Caleb blinked, a small smile creeping up on his face. “They’re beautiful.”

“They’re linked,” Molly said, handing him the sun and holding the moon in his own hand. “Focus about the one in my hand.”

Caleb closed his eyes and closed his fist around the little pendant of the sun. Molly felt the tug almost immediately, warmth spreading through the metal and his whole hand. Instantly he felt the direction of the pull of the other pendant, letting Caleb’s hand meet his own to bring them back together. 

He stared at the two pendants hanging between them, the sun and the moon, fire and ice. “I don’t know exactly how far away they work, but the clerk said they would work across the globe. Even if they don’t I thought they’d be nice if we were ever somewhere and you wanted to leave or give me some kind of sign.” Molly swallowed and looked up at Caleb. “Or if one of us gets hurt or something. We can always find the other.”

It wasn’t foolproof. If Caleb didn’t want to be found, he could just not wear it. Molly knew that. But he also trusted Caleb now, and if he was right, this would be something to help both their peace of mind not hinder it.

The smile across Caleb’s face wasn’t the blinding one that could outshine the sun, but a tender one that had tears in the corners of his eyes, one that could make the moon weep. “I love them,” he said softly, turning a bit and handing the sun back to Molly. “Would you?”

Molly clasped the sun around his neck, and turned so Caleb could fasten the moon around his own.

He thumbed over the sun at his throat, the golden chain looking as wonderful against the freckles as Molly could have ever hoped. Warmth bloomed across his chest as Caleb focused on the necklace, making him want to move closer even though they were so close their noses practically touched.

Caleb continued to rub his thumb over the necklace, flushing gently under the pleasant heat and the deep gaze. “I… I should probably go give Caduceus his present. We went all the way to Emon for those strange plants, I’d hate for them to die without his green thumb.”

Molly nodded, not moving a muscle. “I think Jester might explode if I don’t give her the next present she’s due.” He had a whole set of fancy paint brushes he’d found while Caleb had brought them to Emon that were just waiting by the tree for him to bring them over. He still didn’t move, basking in the warmth and the comfortable presence.

Soon the spell was broken, Veth dragging Caleb away to give him the present she’d gotten him, some kind of book from what Molly could tell. He went over to talk with Jester and make sure everyone was happy and the last few gifts had been given out. Winding around everyone and the spectral cats passing out cocoa he watched Beau look over her ridiculous pile of fireworks from Jester, Fjord flipping through all the flowers he got Yasha and letting her write down the names in her book, Caduceus waiting patiently to give Fjord the last present, and Jester waiting suspiciously close to a doorway that had some hanging mistletoe that definitely wasn’t there earlier.

Every once in a while, he’d catch Caleb’s eye and his wizard would smile softly, thumbing over the sun and filling Molly with warmth.


	103. The Nutcracker

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Could I pick anything but a lil Zemnian E.T.A. Hoffmann for Caleb, even if it wasn't my favorite children's book? The answer is no.

### Chapter 103: The Nutcracker

The weekend after Winter’s Crest, Jester and Veth had planned the first reading at the bookstore. Caleb was a little apprehensive of the whole thing, but he’d been promised at least that Kiri and Luc would be there. That was reason enough to make a good show of it, and they had just come out with a beautiful anniversary edition of _The Nutcracker_ with illustrations by Maurice Sendak. His accent would work well for the story at least, and he made a pretty good Drosselemier, if he did say so himself.

He had even convinced Calianna to come upstairs and read for Maria. As much as he loved Jester, Yasha, and Veth, their voices weren’t quite like a little girl. And he’d never admit it, but they weren’t the best performers in the world either. Yasha could do well with her harp on occasion, but he didn’t think that would extend to storytelling.

Jester and Veth had been busy making little nutcracker and rat king shaped cookies anyways, alongside hot cocoa and coffee that they’d flavored with some plum syrup for the sugar plum fairy. They insisted that his reading would bring in tons more customers, and had opened up the big window on the second floor so his illusion would look like a movie projection out to the street.

Knowing it wasn’t just children looking made him a little more nervous, but he just watched a few versions of the ballet and made sure his illusion would be long enough. He’d actually looked into acquiring a completely different spell, one that didn’t require the jade dust and could last longer, but hadn’t told Jester or Veth. If they knew this didn’t cost any money, they were much more likely to force him to do it repeatedly.

He was nervous enough as it was.

But Molly had been more than happy to play the soundtrack over and over again to get the music right, and watch the ballet productions with him, even if every time they watched it he started looking at tutus online. It had been fun, spending the time to make sure everything was perfect for something he probably wouldn’t mess up too badly. Something that would at the very least entertain Luc and Kiri for a few minutes.

It was much easier than thinking about how to make the wish spell work for Molly.

He’d tried so hard and been so careful when working on Veth’s spell, all for it to come to nothing when it truly mattered. Jester had saved the day of course, and looking back Veth hadn’t been ready yet either. But Caleb was still worried. Veth’s love was unconditional and constant. Molly’s still felt rather fresh and nebulous.

The rational part of him knew that there was no real risk to how Molly saw him. Every other part of him was terrified of failure.

Just as the thoughts started to overwhelm, his chest bloomed with warmth from the sun pendant hanging around his neck. Turning it over in his fingers, he looked down the street and saw Molly slipping out of the _Emporium_ just as Caleb rounded the corner. He really had missed having a necklace to fidget with, and the little metal sun stylized with swirling gold engravings was pleasant to the touch, thrumming with magic and connected to Molly.

They’d tested the limits of the pendants a bit, and found that there wasn’t only a tug but a sense of the other’s emotions tangible just below the surface. Molly could feel when there was a twinge of panic or guilt as Caleb rubbed the pendant, and had immediately shown up in person to comfort him. He hadn’t really meant to project that, but it warranted more tests.

Molly thought the most important of which was when one of them got hurt, taking advantage of activating the pendant after stubbing his toe. Caleb felt the urgency then, the twinge of pain. He’d even teleported to Emon, just to test the distance. Standing in a crowded square, he felt the tug, pointing him in the right direction halfway across the world.

He could feel Molly’s excitement for a moment behind the warmth, that it had worked, that they were connected like this. Just in case.

Throughout the next few days, every once in a while, he would feel a little warmth bloom in his chest, accompanied usually with the emotion of boredom while Molly was at work, or a text that just said, “Thinking of you.” It was lovely, and it made the times when Caleb absentmindedly activated the pendant while worrying it’s surface better. Those prompted texts of heart emojis that Caleb could never seem to find on his keyboard, or reminders to take breaks at work. Or, in their apartment, mugs of tea and stolen kisses on the cheek or temple.

He knew he could take it off, or be more guarded with his emotions, but he found he didn’t really want to. Those moments of warmth were little bright spots in his day, reminding him why he was taking the risk of failure to work on Molly’s spell.

And now, Molly could feel the nervousness from a mile away (or about ten yards), jogging across the street and almost getting hit by a cab on his way to tackle him in a hug. Burrowing into his shoulder, Caleb took a moment to relish the fresh smell of incense and lavender before speaking, “Please don’t get hit by a car ten minutes before I have to do a performance.”

“You’re saying you’d rather do this than follow me to the hospital? Isn’t that a good sign?” Molly’s tone was light and teasing, but the hug was warm and genuine. “Here I was, going to offer to throw myself down the stairs and twist my ankle so you didn’t have to do it.”

Caleb let out a sarcastic laugh that sounded a bit more feeble than intended. As soon as this was over, he’d have nothing to worry about but the possibility of messing up Molly’s spell.

“You’ll do wonderfully, love. C’mon, let’s go get set up.”

Molly kept his arm around Caleb’s shoulders as they walked inside, chatting about his work day and various readings in a way that was just distracting enough to calm Caleb’s racing mind. He let Caleb sneak into the bookstore to meet Calianna and call her upstairs, waving to Fjord as the half orc took off his coat and got settled for the afternoon shift.

“Break a leg you two,” Fjord said, pulling out a book and sinking into the plush desk chair behind the counter.

“Thank you, Mr. Fjord!” Calianna said, shifting her weight nervously.

Caleb followed her up the stairs, hearing Jester welcome Calianna, and Veth bustling around with an order in the bakery. Slipping in quietly, the book he’d been practicing with tucked under his arm, he looked around the café. Veth and Jester had transformed it for Winter’s Crest, covering the ceiling with hanging paper snowflakes and making sure there was an inordinate amount of glittery white garland wrapped around every table leg, railing, and countertop. It looked like a winter wonderland, and Jester and Veth had worn matching flowing white dresses to top it all off. There was a smattering of strange colors along the hem of both skirts that ranged from acrylic paint to espresso, and it was very homey.

It felt even more so when he heard the tiny footsteps and voice calling, “Uncle Caleb!”

“Hallo, Mäuschen,” he grinned, scooping up Luc just as he was about to collide with his knees. “How are you?”

“Good! I got a ring that does this!” Luc stuck his hand out and released a small top from the gold band on his finger that spun wildly across the room but didn’t topple. He giggled in Caleb’s arms as it skittered across the floor and knocked into people’s boots. “What did you get for Winter’s Crest?”

Caleb fished out the necklace hidden under his sweater, letting Luc turn the sun pendant over in his fingers. “I got the book you and your mom picked out for me, and this. Guess what?”

“What?” he asked, eyes wide as he looked at the shining metal piece.

Leaning forward, conspiratorially, Caleb whispered, “It’s powerful magic.”

“Yeah?” Luc said, looking at the sun again. “Like my ring?”

“Nowhere near as cool as your ring, but still magic. Let me show you.” He turned a bit, trying to catch eyes with Mollymauk across the room. Surprised to find the soft red eyes already trained on him with an adoring look that threatened to make him blush, he looked down at the necklace in Luc’s hands and then winked.

Molly quickly winked back, holding his own pendant and keeping up talking to Jester like nothing had happened.

Caleb turned back to Luc gasping in his arms, a wide grin spreading across his face as he felt the warmth and positive tug of the pendant. “Whoa. What’s it doing? Is it going to burn?”

“No, no, it’s safe. It’s letting me know that someone I care about is okay."

"Cool," Luc grinned even wider before Veth came to steal him away.

"C'mon, Luc. Uncle Caleb has to get ready, she said, motioning for Caleb to hand him down.

He threw him up in the air once, not missing how Veth immediately produced a feather and a dangerous look, but risking it for the cascade of rewarding giggles. "Bye, Uncle Caleb! Good luck!"

Veth perched him on her waist, circling around and chatting with what looked like other moms. She dodged some kids who were running around expertly, better than Caleb fared, almost tumbling over and landing straight in Molly’s arms. “Hey there, stranger,” he said, sneaking a quick peck while Caleb was righting himself.

“Entschuldigung,” Caleb apologized, lingering just an extra moment to avoid the inevitable where he’d have to go read in favor of just letting Molly hold him for hours.

Molly just gave him a knowing smile, kissing his forehead. “You’ll be wonderful, love. The whole school came to see Luc’s magic uncle.”

Letting out a soft groan, Caleb hid one more second in the crook of his neck, receiving a little squeeze of encouragement. “Might as well get it over with,” he mumbled, breaking away and straightening his knitted white and blue sweater from Caduceus. The snowflakes on it seemed to be appropriate, and it was long enough to feel like he was hiding, just a bit.

“It’s going to be amazing. I think you like performing more than you let on,” Molly teased, sneaking one last kiss to his cheek before nudging him towards the two seats at the front of the room, one already occupied by a nervous Calianna.

She waved at him, smiling softly and pulling her chair close enough that she would be able to read out of the same book. “Ready?” she asked softly, an excited smile beginning to pull up the corners of her mouth despite the nervous energy.

“As I’ll ever be,” Caleb said, trying to relax a bit.

Maybe Mollymauk was right. Did he like to perform? He always took great pleasure in showing off new spells, especially for friends. Of course he had greatly enjoyed this kind of attention as a child. The praise and admiration of his peers and his mentors had felt like the best thing in the world. It was only after he left the Sanitarium that he had been concerned about being too loud, too ostentatious, too noticeable.

There was no reason to worry about that anymore.

Caleb took a deep breath as he looked out over the crowd of eager children and parents clustered around the window of _Divine Delights._

He wasn’t hiding anymore.

Calianna introduced them both, and gave a quick prepared statement about the new edition of the book and how it would be for sale downstairs during and after their performance. Turning to Caleb with an even wider smile and sending the looks of everyone in the room his way, she silently waited for her next cue.

He took one last deep breath as he cracked open the book, getting to the first page and bringing out his little piece of fleece. Waiting for the swell of the overture to begin after whispering the incantation to himself, his chest bloomed with warmth and he caught Molly’s excited gaze.

Suddenly Caleb was reminded of the first time he watched Molly perform at the _Lavish Chateau,_ draped in a glittering purple gown and wearing deep plum makeup. It was strange to think now he knew what that plum lipstick looked like smudged, and marked over his own collar bone. At the time, he’d been entranced, spellbound with no magic involved. It was the moment he’d been completely unable to deny his attraction to the ridiculous tiefling. The memory filled him with a strange determination. He wasn’t a singer or a dancer or a swordsperson, but he could do this.

The curtains of his illusion pulled away to reveal a living room decorated to the nines for Winter’s Crest. The tree was lit with candles that twinkled and crackled with the sound of real flame. The art on the walls of the little parlor seemed so full of life it moved. Sprinkled throughout the room were the little creations of Godfather Drosselmeier, each one animated just like how he’d imagined they would as a child. Everyone who had come to see the performance gasped, and as he looked around the room he could see even the adults putting down their books and phones to look at the large image now playing over the window in the café.

He couldn’t help the grin on his face as he began to read, “On the nineteenth of Duscar Dr. Stahlbaum’s children were not allowed to set foot in the small family parlor, much less the adjoining company parlor– not at any time during the day. Fritz and Marie sat huddled together…”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (if you're reading this tonight (1/28) or tomorrow, please come scream with me on tumblr @calebneedsahug about this fucking 5 hour episode we're about to experience)


	104. The Ritual

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Caleb conquers some of his anxieties, and Molly prepares to face some of his own

### Chapter 104: The Ritual

At heart, Molly wasn’t really a performer.

He knew he was gorgeous and good with swords, but his real skills lied in tricking the audience into thinking he was doing something amazing. His sleight of hand had always been a bit more impressive than his stage presence, and he always felt a bit more like a cheesy magician with no magic than a real performer. Molly was more bullshit than true performer, and he’d accepted that long ago.

There was no denying that when Caleb got going, he was an amazing performer, through and through. No deception, no tricks, just raw, arcane glory, shaped by the wonderful hands of a Mr. Caleb Widogast.

Molly wasn’t exactly surprised by this, but seeing what could have been a full length television program or professional ballet production emerge just from a wave of Caleb’s hands and a piece of fleece was something else entirely. He sat just as enraptured as the children on pillows in front of him, watching the whole thing wide eyed and picking out the costume elements they’d talked about together, the moves from the ballets they’d watched, the music they’d played. It all came together in a harmonious swirl of Tchaikovsky and vibrant holiday colors.

If Molly hadn’t already been in love, he probably would have fallen in love on the spot, watching Caleb captivate a group of small children into stunned silence. He might have been concerned about it too, the room full of people who were probably suddenly at least a little in love with his wizard, but as soon as the book closed and the little illustrations came out one last time to take a bow, Caleb’s eyes were trained on him.

The blue eyes were filled with warmth and love as Luc scrambled up to claim his place in Caleb’s lap, and Molly felt real warmth surge through him while Caleb’s thumb brushed the pendant at his neck. Love, satisfaction, and pure joy echoed through him and effectively tugged him across the room to be at Caleb’s side, like he really was a moon orbiting a shining sun.

Confidence was a very good look on Caleb.

He made sure to tell him so as he bent down and kissed his cheek, just to watch the blush creep across those freckled cheeks. Not at all to stake a little claim on his wizard who was now surrounded by parents who were awed and kids who thought he was some sort of deity.

In the end they sold every copy of the book they’d ordered, and had to put in orders for six more.

That and the shop had kids running around with cookies shaped like the nutcracker and the rat king play-fighting for hours after the performance. Veth was a little concerned, but Jester welcomed the chaos with open arms and made Caleb promise to read another story next month.

Caleb seemed full of light for the rest of the day, walking on air and insisting they go out to a restaurant for an impromptu date night. His insistence didn’t really extend to a knowledge of any fancy places to eat, so he and Molly spent time curled up in the relative quiet of Caleb’s study relaxing and coming down from the high of the afternoon while reading yelp reviews of new places to try. 

The little shop they found was brand new, right on the water and serving fresh seafood even in the winter. With all the tourists gone for the season the little place was empty save a few locals, quiet and intimate. They slipped back into old habits, practicing a little of Caleb’s Infernal as they read the menu. He could hold a whole conversation now, though his accent would never quite be as harsh as it needed to be. Caleb claimed Zemnian sounded harsh, but Molly just found it to be rather husky. It was still soft around the edges, not quite like Infernal.

“You have the next two days off, ja?” Caleb asked, as if his schedule had suddenly changed after more than a year of it being the same whenever he worked.

Molly raised a brow. “Of course. I always do. I’ll be free tomorrow, then we’ll have Whelson off together. Why, did you want to do something special?”

“I think…” He frowned into his shrimp pasta before going on. “I think it’s time I stopped being afraid of failure and attempted the ritual. I can work from home tomorrow and transcribe the wish spell, then we can cast the spell on Whelson.”

Blinking slowly once, Molly took in the words. Two days.

Caleb saw the moment of hesitation and all his confidence melted away again while he backpedaled wildly. “Of course, if you’re not ready, Liebling, we don’t have to-”

“No, I-I want to,” Molly said quickly. “I just wasn’t expecting… What were you afraid of? Is it not ready?”

Poking his meal with his fork, he chewed his lip a moment before answering. “I believe the spell is ready. But I also thought the same for Veth’s spell, and that went terribly.”

That made Molly reach across the table, taking Caleb’s hand. He wished they’d gotten a booth and sat next to each other, though it might have looked strange. “Hey, that wasn’t your fault, or your spell even.”

“I should have been more prepared. I did not mean to get her hopes up. I don’t… I don’t want to get your hopes up either. This is something to try, but not the last resort. We can try other things, if we need to. We could go to Aeor and see what we’re dealing with up close.” The set of Caleb’s jaw was firm and determined, like nothing could keep him from this puzzle, but it all twisted in Molly’s guts like snakes.

He swallowed before answering. “I’m ready to try whatever you’d like. I’m not sure I’m ready to go on a Nott-Hag-style-vision-quest or whatever, but if you think the spell is the best it can be, it’s worth a shot right?”

“I’d like to try it. It’s the only real way to know if it will work or not, but if I… If I am not strong enough, I might not be able to cast the spell ever again. I don’t want to mess up this chance.” Caleb looked up at him, blue eyes swimming with that passion for the arcane that Molly fell in love with.

He nodded, “If it doesn't work, we’ll keep at it. But I believe in you. You’re not going to disappoint me, unless you accidentally turn me yellow or something.”

That earned a smirk. “What about pink?”

“Pink could be cute,” Molly mused, glad to see Caleb smile again. He wanted to pull that confidence back up to the surface.

There was still an underlying nervousness, but Caleb seemed resolved. “I could change anything about you that you’d like, really. I haven’t offered because you and I both know you’re perfect.”

Molly could have melted into a puddle, asking for the check so he could drag his sweet wizard home and avoid the embarrassing amounts of PDA he was about to put Caleb through for being such a sweetheart.

It felt like any other day, really.

Molly woke up slightly when Caleb slipped out of bed early, sneaking a quick kiss to the crown of his head and sending Frumpkin to purr against his chest. He fell back asleep to the now soothing scratch of a fountain pen on fancy parchment at Caleb’s desk, set up beside his own vanity. Molly had insisted on moving it in front of the window so Caleb could have his mother’s rose on it, along with the paperweight and all the fancy pens Veth kept stealing for him.

That and the handcrafted wooden desk from Blumenthal really did smell lovely, and moving it by the window brought it close to the bed. Every night Molly could curl up next to Caleb, smelling the woodsmoke, old books, and cinnamon he loved mingling with the smell of old wood and incense. For now, it lulled him back to sleep until more sun streamed through the window and had him and Frumpkin both stretching in tandem.

Caleb was writing furiously at his desk, the pen flying over the pages and a half drunk mug of coffee forgotten at the top of the scattered pages. Stifling a yawn, Molly padded over and wrapped his arms around his wizard, kissing Caleb’s cheek. “When was the last time you stretched your legs?”

Blue eyes blinked a moment and he felt Caleb’s spine crack against his sternum. “Five hours and thirteen minutes.”

“Yikes. Up, up, up,” Molly said, patting his shoulders and stepping back so he could stand. “Take a lap and I’ll make breakfast.”

Caleb looked forlornly down at his work, then back up at Molly, shoulders already sinking in defeat as Molly took a moment to rub some of the tension out of them. He groaned and leaned back at the touch, much stiffer than he’d realized. “There you go,” Molly purred, “your work will be there in twenty minutes once you’ve had some food. I’m not gonna let you do the spell if you break your back transcribing the whole thing in one day.”

He was still wearing an expression that was more pout than anything else, but he did get up and stretch his arms and touch his toes, groaning again as his joints cracked and popped. “Fine, fine. As you wish.”

Molly waited for him to straighten his spine and stole a quick kiss. “I’ll make us some eggs and toast. Super quick. Walk around and pet Frumpkin while I do.”

That was how their whole day went, Molly lazing around and making sure that Caleb got up every once in a while to stretch and eat. His genius plan was mostly just making Caleb cup after cup of herbal tea from Caduceus, insisting he looked stressed but really just making him have to get up to use the bathroom constantly. 

After working on his embroidery for a few hours he got bored again, making a quick run to the grocery store. He undertook something more complicated for dinner, deciding to try his hand at a big chicken pot pie they could have as leftovers. It would kill time, and allowed him to keep an eye on Caleb working at the dining table as a change of pace. 

A knock on the door startled Molly as he was pulling out the pot pie, but Caleb just shot up and got the door. “Hallo, Veth. Danke, I owe you one.”

“Of course, Caleb!” she said, letting him take the bags from her arms. “You can just babysit Luc again. He’s been asking about your stories nonstop. He wants one of Sleeping Beauty next.”

Caleb started sifting through the bags to make sure it was all there, whatever it was. Veth seemed to feel like her expertise was being doubted because she said, “It’s all there. Even though it’s much fancier than _my_ spell.”

“I just want to make sure, Schatz. It’s just me this time, and I’d rather get it on the first shot. You were cursed by a hag, not a malevolent chaotic hive mind in a city on a separate plane.” Caleb ruffled her hair, pulling out purple candles and a huge container of what looked like purple glitter. The bag smelled like lavender and Molly was suddenly touched, thanking her just as much as he would Caleb. Well. Almost as much.

Veth was easily convinced to eat dinner with them. But Molly failed to convince her to invite Yeza and Luc, and he was pretty sure he saw Caleb sneaking his copper wire back into his pocket when he turned back around. Probably warning her from staying too long. He did have that determined look back in his eye, even though he agreed when Molly insisted he would need a night of good rest before attempting the ritual at all.

Once Veth left, Molly took a long shower, trying to look in peak form since tomorrow would hopefully be the first time he would see his body as completely his own, not Luciens. Of course _this_ body wouldn’t exist tomorrow, if everything went correctly. The thought only occurred to him after all the exfoliating, but it felt nice all the same. Then Molly set up on the couch in just sweatpants with his laptop, playing Netflix through his earbuds so he wouldn’t bother Caleb with extra sound. He sipped the special tea from Caduceus, chasing off dreams one last time.

Before he knew it, Caleb was carefully pulling out his earbuds and mumbling some incantation. Molly frowned, reaching towards his wizard before getting lifted, mostly by magic, but partly by Caleb’s arms supporting him. He wrapped his arms around Caleb’s neck. “Did you stay up too late?”

“It’s just after midnight. We can sleep in and do the spell midmorning. You still feel ready?” Caleb asked, pulling a hand away though still supporting Molly with his magic, and brushing purple curls from his face.

Molly nodded, “And how much magic are you using just so I don’t have to walk to bed?”

“Plenty, but I didn’t use any all day, Liebling. And you’re adorable when you’re sleepy.” Caleb bent over a hair to kiss Molly’s forehead before tucking him under the covers. “No need to wake you up all the way.”

Practically purring, Molly moved the covers back to draw Caleb in next to him. He wrapped around his favorite wizard and pulled him flush against his chest. “Have I told you how much I love you yet today?”

“Given that today started just a little over thirty minutes ago, no, you have not,” Caleb mumbled over a yawn.

Molly fought and failed to hold back a yawn of his own. “I love you more than the moon loves the sun. My love for you is vaster than the ocean, than the cosmos.” He sounded sleep drunk and smitten, but he supposed he was.

“I love you more,” Caleb said simply, twisting to kiss him once before they both drifted off to sleep.

It felt like any other day, but hopefully it was the end of an era and a new beginning all in one. Hope was tangible in the air as they slept, a tangle of limbs and love.


	105. Widogast's Transmogrification

### Chapter 105: Widogast’s Transmogrification

When Caleb woke up that morning he had the kind of anxiety that made him feel on the verge of nausea. It had been quite a while since Caleb had actually been so anxious that he vomited, but it certainly had happened, and he certainly had no time for it today.

The worst part about it was that it felt like rational anxiety, like when he’d been worried about the Volstrucker or monsters in the Empire. He should be worried about messing up Mollymauk’s spell. This might be his only chance to cast the wish spell, if it didn’t work properly and he became unable to cast it afterwards.

There were many ifs and uncertainties to do with this ritual, and Caleb wasn’t a fan of them. He enjoyed the occasional calculated risk from time to time, but this was something he wanted to be sure of.

But there wasn’t any more research to be done.

He knew everything he could find out about the city and the nine eyes from DeRogna’s notes and the strange tome before it got weird and scribbly. Everything from the Cobalt Soul corroborated the details, and he knew there wasn’t much left to do but try. It was the most powerful spell known to arcane casters. Probably the most powerful spell there was, but he wasn’t going to claim that this power was only capable by wizards and sorcerers. It might have been, but he wasn’t going to say it out loud anywhere.

Still, despite knowing how much power he was capable of, he was worried.

Caleb was always a bit worried, but this must have shown on his face as soon as he woke up since Molly almost instantly bombarded him with a hug and started peppering kisses along his neck and jaw that tickled. Squirming away and failing miserably at gaining any real distance, Caleb couldn’t help the laughter that bubbled up. “Molly, Leibling, it’s far too early for that-”

“Really?” Molly raised a brow, looking down at him and definitely not letting him go. “What time is it?”

“Quarter to ten. Time to eat something and get started.” Caleb began to sit up.

Molly pulled him right back down and kissed him once, grinning at the startled yelp he gained for his work. “In a minute. You have to remember exactly how my lips feel, right? We’ve gotta make sure your memory’s perfect.”

He wasn’t foolish enough not to kiss back, but he did pull away after a minute, trying not to seem as breathless as he was. “You know my memory is already perfect.”

“But it’s a great excuse, isn’t it?” Molly asked, stealing one more kiss before letting go and heading to the bathroom.

Caleb couldn’t help but notice the change, used to being able to relax a moment while Molly put in all the jewelry and chains on his horns and ears. There was no need to today, since they’d just get covered in clay. Molly was strangely silent as he brushed his teeth without his windchime-like ensemble, but still grinned and bumped Caleb’s hip as he moved to brush his own teeth beside him.

Unsure whether the anticipation of putting off the ritual was worse than just diving in, Caleb opted to take his time with breakfast and make one of Molly’s favorites. The pancakes his mother had made were more like what they called crêpes here, but Molly liked the big fluffy ones. Caleb still made his with a thin ring of apple inside so they tasted a bit like his mother’s Apfelküchle. She was the only reason he knew anything about cooking after all. 

Here in Nicodranas they didn’t have sugar maples either, so they ate their pancakes with honey instead of maple syrup. Caleb found it sort of sticky and awful, but Molly loved it. He did his best to make a kind of syrup out of some of the leftover apple and some cinnamon that he let cook down while he made the little cakes.

Molly was a wonderful sous chef, using his ridiculous knife skills to perfectly slice the rings of apple and more than happy to chat with Caleb while stirring the syrup. Happiness and excitement radiated off of him as they worked, and to Caleb’s surprise, the feelings were contagious.

By the time they had full bellies and everything in the dishwasher, Caleb was mostly over his nausea at least. His nerves probably wouldn’t go away until it was over, but that was to be expected.

Molly closed the door to the bathroom with the two of them inside with all the spell components and carefully started to take off the last of his jewelry. He took off the three necklaces, placing the anti-divination pendant, the hunk of amber, and the little moon on the side of the sink. They’d talked this over many times; everything that it would entail, so there was little that needed to be said.

Caleb did what he could to make the ritual as much a tribute to Mollymauk and everything he was as it was a spell. A lot of the success of the outcome of a wish spell seemed to come from the intent of the caster, and Caleb wanted to ensure that his intent was to bring forth Mollymauk, alone and unaffected by the Somnovem and their power. The first thing he’d done was make sure that just about everything was purple. The clay wasn’t purple, though he’d managed to order some red clay that Veth picked up the day before. But there were purple candles that burned purple flames to light the workspace (however strange it was to call their bathroom a workspace, that’s what it was now), purple amethyst gem dust, and some dried lavender and incense just because the smell was so intrinsically Mollymauk.

The candles weren’t strictly necessary either, but the fire made Caleb feel more in control of his arcane powers, and the smell added to the heady, intense feeling in their small bathroom. They’d considered casting the spell in the tower, but Caleb didn’t want to add in any unpredictable variables, and pocket dimensions and planes were just that.

So they disabled their smoke detector in the bathroom, lit more candles than was strictly advisable, and got to work. After a few moments in the dark, Caleb took a chance and opened the little window that looked out to the ocean. From where he worked, he could see, though it was say, the two full moons hanging low in the sky. It felt very Molly, despite his moon necklace sitting on the sink with the others so it wouldn’t get covered in clay. Sprinkled over the clay in the bathtub was a handful of dried lavender, and the necessary crushed gem dust was applied with direction from Molly himself so that it highlighted his cheekbones, his cupid’s bow, the ridge of his nose, parts of his horns, and most of his chest and tattoos, ignoring the eyes.

Caleb checked all of the necessary components twice, ignoring how his eidetic memory wouldn’t have possibly let him forget the exact measurements of things. The steadiness that he felt while dealing with magical components was calming, and Mollymauk seemed to be reassured by the careful movements.

But soon, he could stall no longer.

“Now the casting time of the wish spell is just six seconds, traditionally. But since I’m asking it to do quite a bit, I’m going through all the motions of my traditional transmogrification spell. So it could take up to an hour,” Caleb explained, taking a last careful look at all the tattoos and scars that swirled across Molly’s chest, as if he hadn’t memorized every part of him long ago.

Molly nodded, and Caleb could feel the nervous excitement between them like a tangible object, a fragile something that needed to be nurtured and set free. “Take as much time as you need, love. It’s not like I’m going anywhere.” His smile was a little rough around the edges, but he didn’t look too worried. More like he was about to go cliff diving for the first time. He trusted Caleb to have his back, to catch him if he fell. Since Caleb always had a feather in his pocket to slow someone from falling, he supposed that trust wasn’t exactly unfounded. It was still hard to believe.

Caleb wasn’t sure if he trusted himself with the same task, but he was damn well going to try. And if for some reason it didn’t work, he would find a way to cast it again.

“While we do it, I’ll need you to visualize yourself, no eyes, completely disconnected from the city. Just like we practiced.” Caleb took Molly’s hands in his, still quite unsure, but wanting to reassure Molly as best he could.

He nodded again. “Will do. I know you’re worried, but I do trust you, dearheart.” Molly leaned forward and kissed his forehead.

“I’ll do my best to be worthy of your trust, Liebling.” Caleb stood up a little straighter. Molly’s trust was implied, but hearing it spoken out loud felt more impactful. More like something he needed to earn.

“You already are. Even if nothing happens, the fact that you did so much work just for me, it’s… It’s lovely. Too much really.” Molly’s smile was softer then, his hands rubbing thumbs along Caleb’s.

Caleb frowned. “There’s no ‘just’ when it comes to you. Or ‘too much.’ You’re worth everything to me.”

“And that’s why, whatever happens, it’s going to be okay. Now let’s get started before I forget and hug you and waste all this pretty purple glitter,” Molly grinned, holding his arms out threateningly.

He sighed softly, unable to stop the fond look in his eye. “Gem dust. Please do be careful, there’s 150 gold worth there.”

Molly balked for a moment and he could see the mental math being done. “This all cost you 600 gold? You should let me pay for half, at least-”

“It’s my spell. And if it works, you can buy me dinner or something.” Caleb waved his hand. He really didn’t care about the money. Spending all his money on spells was something he’d been used to his entire life.

But Molly was pouting. “I’m going to find you a 300 gold dinner then. Somehow. We’ll eat diamonds or something.”

He snorted, rolling his eyes, and changing the subject, “Are you ready?”

Molly took a deep breath and the two of them shared a knowing look. It was now or never.

Nodding, Molly stepped towards the bathtub. “Time to get filthy.”

Caleb could do no more but roll his eyes, beginning the rather disconcerting process of molding the clay around his partner. It felt strange to be doing this to another one of the people he cared most about in the world, but it wasn’t as if Caleb’s world was ever normal.

He did the head last, as it was always the most disconcerting part. The horns and the hair would be quite difficult to cover completely and probably difficult to wash all the clay out of later. But there would be time to worry about that bit once they were finished.

“I, um, I’m going to cover your eyes now. Close them for me?” Caleb asked, once he’d gotten everything but Molly’s face.

Molly raised a brow while he still had the chance to, smirking a little bit. “One thing first?”

Caleb nodded quickly, suddenly concerned again, “Of course, do you need a drink or something? I could find a straw-”

“Kiss me?”

He couldn't ever stop the blush that crept up when Molly did that, helpless but to nod and lean down just to kiss him gently.

Molly tipped his chin up just a bit to kiss deeper a moment before pulling back so only their noses were touching. “Perfect. Love you,” he said, barely more than a light breath between them.

“Love you too,” Caleb said, still blushing softly as he pulled back. Only Mollymauk could look ridiculously attractive while mostly covered in clay.

He winked at Caleb before closing his eyes and settling back down, allowing the clay to be spread over his face. Keeping it thinnest here, Caleb made sure there were holes around the nose where he could breathe. Caleb really wasn’t sure how long the spell would take to cast, but being prepared for everything seemed best.

Standing back, he looked down at his work and sprinkled over the lavender. It was about as good as it could be, he thought. He’d never been an artist, not with anything but magic.

So there was nothing but to focus on the spell.

Caleb felt the familiar swirling of arcane energy as he prepared to cast, but there was something strange around him. He might have panicked if it hadn’t felt so familiar. Another curling energy, separate from his own, swirled around him, supporting him like a firm hug from behind, like Molly sneaking up from behind to kiss his neck.

In the light of the two full moons, the energy felt welcoming even in its cool embrace.

And even as he was focused over the spell, he swore he could see an ethereal figure, cloaked in the shadows, leaning forward to kiss Molly’s forehead as he had done a million times before.

He’d been in the presence of gods and goddesses before, around Jester and Caduceus, but there was something deeply warmed in him at the fact that a goddess would come for Molly at the behest of his own magic. He hadn’t summoned something this strong since he brought down fire upon Vess DeRogna and her mages attacking Molly. It felt right that he’d only use his most powerful magic for Molly. The Moonweaver’s magical, divine energy embracing him helped guide him through the rest of the ritual he performed as he prepared to say the wish spell. Knowing a goddess was on Molly’s side soothed his nerves.

If there were going to be consequences, they could be for Caleb.

Mollymauk would be safe.

He whispered, just under his breath, “Danke schön, Sehanine.”

And he began to cast wish.


	106. Reborn

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the aftermath of a powerful wish

### Chapter 106: Reborn

Molly was not a fan of being covered in clay. It was wet and sticky, and even after it dried it was unpleasant and crackly. He didn’t really like mud baths, or mud masks, but this was important.

He wasn’t really expecting the clay not to even have a chance to dry.

From the moment Caleb started to speak arcane words and incantations, to the end of the spell and the huge exertion of force he felt stream out of his body, couldn’t have been more than ten seconds. There was the familiar swirl of Caleb’s energy, burning bright and orange and smelling of woodsmoke and cinnamon, but alongside it was a different energy. A cool autumn breeze through a field of clean, almost faded wildflowers.

Both were familiar and comforting as he visualized himself separate from anything but himself. Not corrupted by weird ancient magic, or whatever other bullshit he’d done in his past. Not Lucien, not Nonagon, not anything by Mollymauk Tealeaf.

There was a bright orange flash and the clay cracked around Molly like a vase thrown against a wall. Vaguely, without the clay in his ears, Molly could hear Caleb swearing, but just for a second he was afraid to look. The anticipation had been building inside him since the night before and now he felt about ready to burst. Very slowly, he took a deep breath, and cracked open an eye.

“Hallo,” Caleb said, a soft smile curling up the corners of his lips. That was a good sign. That was a great sign. Caleb was no good at hiding his disappointment from Molly.

“Hey,” Molly said, taking a risk and looking down at his hand.

His hand with a big empty spot where there had once been a big red eye.

“Mollymauk, I do believe you have a body that’s entirely your own. And in need of some new tattoos,” Caleb murmured, running his fingers over the nine bare spots now apparent on Molly’s skin.

He stared at them in awe, unable to keep the grin off his face. And then he couldn’t keep himself from laughing uncontrollably and surging forward to hug Caleb. His Caleb. His wizard. His wonderful wizard.

“You did it,” he said, smile audible in his words clear as day. “You did it. You’re amazing. Wonderful. I-I can’t- _Thank you.”_

Caleb pulled back with an equal grin, still crackling with that intoxicating arcane power and keeping his arms tight around Molly’s torso. Molly’s torso that had no more fucking eyes on it. Molly’s torso that was his and his alone. “Your body is your own now. This,” Caleb poked Molly’s sternum, “belongs to no one but you. Once I send the notes to a demiplane, only the two of us know about, we should all be free of that scourge of a city for at least a millennium or two, or perhaps forever.”

Molly nodded quickly, stepping back and looking at the amber vault that held the papers on the counter of the bathroom. “Of course. Do you need me to set up the stuff for that too?”

“Well,” Caleb winced, now looking unsteady on his feet, “to be perfectly honest, I’ve done the calculations and casting a spell that strong today might actually knock me unconscious.”

Eyes wide, Molly moved back to Caleb’s side, supporting his weight though he felt tired himself, “Fuck, Caleb, why didn’t you tell me?”

“I mentioned it would take a lot out of me, ja?” he said, stifling a yawn, but he really looked like he might collapse at any second, regardless of whether he was casting spells or not. Definitely much worse than Molly felt.

Molly shook his head quickly, “Taking a lot out of you means you might need a quick nap or big meal or something. Not that you’re going to collapse in our bathroom!”

“From what I read, I just cannot cast today,” Caleb mumbled, but he was already leaning heavily on Molly’s shoulder. “Tomorrow I should be able to at least cast the spell and complete some final research notes.”

“So it’s not a one day thing?” Molly asked. It was rare that Caleb would admit a weakness like this, so he was concerned.

He nodded, “Veth’s spell was similar. I expected this. I will feel… weak. For a number of days.”

“How long?”

Caleb sighed softly, allowing himself to be led towards their bedroom and closing his eyes like he had to think carefully to pick each word. “Earliest recorded recovery seemed to be two days.”

“And the longest?” Molly asked, beginning to grow more and more apprehensive. It would be just like Caleb to use insanely powerful magic and not tell anyone how much it would drain him.

“Over a week,” he mumbled, and Molly couldn’t help but see how his legs were wobbling.

After a moment, Molly made a decision and just scooped Caleb up bridal style, carrying him to their bedroom instead.

His eyes flew back open, wide and blue but completely exhausted. “I’m perfectly capable of walking. All the books said light activity was fine-”

“Well, you can tell me that when you look like you’re not about to keel over. After a nap and maybe some food, okay? You definitely need to eat more, you’re way too light.” Molly kicked open the slightly ajar door of their bedroom.

Caleb sighed, still trying to lessen the weight by curling his arms around Molly’s neck. “How would you carry me?”

“I’ll get stronger, obviously.” Molly rolled his eyes.

He chuckled through a yawn. “You have an answer for everything.”

“And if I don’t, I can always make up a good one.”

Caleb didn’t argue as Molly swaddled him in blankets and slipped out to order some takeout. Through the open door he could already seeCaleb falling asleep. Sleep was probably good. After getting some soup from the local deli set up for delivery, he called Caduceus.

“Hello, Mr. Mollymauk.”

“And hello to you, Mr. Clay.”

“What can I help you with today?” he asked, the easy tone still ever present in his voice.

Molly shifted further away from the bedroom door, just in case, but keeping an eye on the steady rise and fall of Caleb’s form under the sheets. “So Caleb did a really powerful spell this morning to help me out with something. I think it worked, and it’s wonderful, but I think it really exhausted him too. Like I’m more tired than I was, but he almost fell asleep on the spot. He’s sleeping now even.”

“I see.” Caduceus’s voice was knowing, and Molly figured he probably guess what he was talking about despite not wanting to get anyone’s hopes up. They could celebrate after a week of no dreams or something.

Ignoring that, Molly went on, “Do you think I should get someone who can heal in here? Or maybe just use a potion? I think we’ve got a couple somewhere. Or is this like a bedrest thing? I’m just worried he’s pushed himself too far for my sake.”

Caduceus hummed. “Well how does he seem? Any aches or pains? Trouble breathing? Bruising around the casting site, or the eyes? Did he bleed while casting it, like you do?”

“No, gods, none of that,” Molly mumbled, thanking the Moonweaver for it all quietly. He hadn’t even considered that. “He’s just really wobbly on his feet and can barely keep his eyes open. I put him to bed and ordered soup, but I feel like I need to be doing more.”

“It sounds like you’re doing just fine, Mollymauk. I’d say if he seems any worse you can certainly call me, or Jester since she’s closer. It might take me a while to get uptown if he’s really bad off.”

Molly breathed a small sigh of relief that he seemed to be doing okay. He’d never really had to take care of anyone but himself before moving in with Caleb, and to be perfectly honest he wasn’t even great at that. He was determined to be better for Caleb. “Thanks, Cad. Maybe I’ll text Jester just to make sure she’s around.”

“That’s a good idea. You can always ask me any other questions too, if you come up with any.”

“You’re the best, Cad.”

“Take it easy, Mr. Mollymauk. And congratulations. I’ll check in with the Wildmother to see if she thinks it worked too. Just in case.”

Molly grinned, though Caduceus couldn’t see it. “I take it back, you’re not the best, you’re a literal angel.”

“Aww, aren’t you sweet?”

“Talk to you later, Cad.”

Molly pulled the phone away from his ear and opened up his texts with Jester. It took him a moment to figure out what to say that wouldn’t immediately freak her out.

> **Molly:** Hey, Jester!  
>  **Molly:** Caleb’s not feeling super hot after casting a spell. I talked with Cad a bit and he said just to keep an eye on him in case it gets worse, but I was just wondering if you were super busy tonight?  
>  **Molly:** Like in case he needs something, I want to know who to call
> 
> **Jester:** ohmygosh is he ok????
> 
> **Molly:** Yeah, he’s fine  
>  **Molly:** Just like REALLY tired  
>  **Molly:** I put him to bed and order soup like the good partner I am
> 
> **Jester:** awwwwwwwwwwww  
>  **Jester:** you two are so cute, taking care of each other!!  
>  **Jester:** i’m not busy tonight, just watching a movie with fjord
> 
> **Molly:** OoooOOOOooooOOOOoooOoo  
>  **Molly:** I’ll do my best not to interrupt ;)
> 
> **Jester:** good  
>  **Jester:** ok, but seriously if caleb’s hurt or dying you’re totally allowed to cockblock me lol
> 
> **Molly:** I’ll keep it in mind  
>  **Molly:** Best of luck ♡
> 
> **Jester:** ♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡  
> 

Molly peeked back into the room, just to make sure that Caleb hadn’t gotten any worse, and found the wizard still cocooned in blankets and cradling a purring Frumpkin to his chest. It almost looked like he’d woken up again and he was going to ask if Caleb needed anything until he was interrupted with a very gentle snore. Unable to resist kissing the man on his sleepy forehead, he snuck out afterwards to wait for the soup delivery.

Then something occurred to him, alongside all his nervous energy from worrying about Caleb and being excited that the spell worked.

He was pretty sure the tattoos were what made his weird blood magic work.

So he did the logical thing and went to go cut himself with a paring knife, just to check. The little slice stung a bit, across the back of his hand and just a little nick. Though he said the familiar incantation, the words fell flat and the wound just bled like normal. The knife didn’t glow with any radiant light as it should.

Well. That was certainly something.

He pulled out his phone again.

> **Molly:** Hey asshole  
>  **Molly:** Can you like  
>  **Molly:** Teach people your monk shit?
> 
> **Asshole:** sup bastard  
>  **Asshole:** whos askin
> 
> **Molly:** Me
> 
> **Asshole:** maybe  
>  **Asshole:** u gotta be willing to come to the gym at 6am tho
> 
> **Molly:** Grosssssssssss  
>  **Molly:** I’ll think about it

Molly made a face at his phone, as if Beau could see his disgust through it, when the doorbell rang. He peeked through the peephole, just to be careful, even though he was pretty sure everyone who might have gone up against him or Caleb was dead. Better safe than sorry, especially when he was without any magic.

But it was just a very tired drow holding a bag that was definitely the right size for soup and a striped hat that no one in their right mind would wear voluntarily.

He thanked him for the soup and tipped him fifty percent since he looked like he needed a pick-me-up. Or maybe a stiff drink. The soup was cheap anyway, and Molly was always happy to help someone who looked like they’d rather jump out the five story high window than get back on his bike and continue his deliveries. For a moment Molly just stood in front of the closed front door, chewing his lip. Caleb would need his energy to heal whatever weird drain he’d done on his body, but he probably needed his sleep too.

In the end he had too much pent up energy to let Caleb just sleep through the rest of the day, so he did what Caleb had done when he got a cold a few months prior. Of course, he didn’t make the soup from scratch, and Caleb wasn’t in dire need of heating pads and tissues, but he still spent time making the perfect blanket nest on their pulled out couch and put the kettle on for tea.

At least this way Molly could keep a careful eye on Caleb without condemning himself to bedrest too. Even if he was a bit tired, he didn’t want to just sleep all day.

If he fell asleep on the couch cuddled up with Caleb and his newly reborn body, so be it.

He carefully gathered Caleb back up into his arms to bring him to their nest. With how often they made it, they probably should just keep it set up at all times. Screw formal seating.

Caleb mumbled and nuzzled closer into his chest while Frumpkin wound between Molly’s legs, wanting Caleb back. “Thought you wanted me to sleep.”

“I want you to eat some lunch too, dearheart. I made up the couch,” Molly said, kissing Caleb’s temple.

He nodded, getting lost in the sheer amount of blankets and pillows covering the pullout couch. Molly plonked Frumpkin on top of it all, grinning as the little bengal started making biscuits and purring. Frumpkin loved their ridiculous little setup too.

Soon they were all curled up with bowls of soup and mugs of tea nearby, Gilbert showing them how to bake bread quietly as they finished up lunch and began to doze. Molly managed to make his way through the pillows to bring Caleb into his chest, rubbing circles on his back and wondering how long it would take for his wonderful wizard to pass out again.

“Hey Caleb?” he asked softly, petting through beautiful red waves with his other hand. His hair was getting quite long, and Molly loved it. He was hard pressed to pick a favorite color, but that might have been it.

Caleb hummed, not really a response, but enough for Molly to know he was listening. 

“I can’t ever thank you enough. The fact that I’m lucky enough to be in love with the one person who could do this… But I’ll try every day. So thank you,” Molly spoke softly, kissing the crown of Caleb’s head.

He hummed again, but it was with more discontent than before. “You deserve your freedom from your past just like I did. And I’m sure there are many members of the Arcana Pansophical who could have helped.”

“Even when you're exhausted, you can’t take a compliment, dear. None of the Arcana Pansexuals or whoever were exactly banging down the door offering to do months of research for me.” Molly sighed and kissed his temple. “Can’t you just admit that you’re lovely and powerful and you did an amazing thing today?”

Caleb’s arms pulled Molly a bit closer, as if they weren’t already as close as could be. “I suppose… I suppose I could admit that _we_ have done something rather amazing today.”

Molly smiled at that. “I can accept that, I suppose. We’ll work on it more later.”

After all, Molly had the rest of his life to convince Caleb that he was amazing. There was nothing stopping them from taking what they wanted. Their pasts were in the past, their enemies were dead and gone, and they had everything they ever wanted stretched out for them on the horizon.

All that was left was to love.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> can't believe this monster of a fic is finally wrapping up.... 
> 
> if you have any ideas of what the fuck I should write once this beast is completed in like a week come let me know on tumblr @ calebneedsahug because I'm not gonna know what to do with myself


	107. They're All Just Bastards

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> a lil therapy, a lil timeskip, and a lot of stuff because it's near the end of this fic and it's wedding season, folks

### Chapter 107: They're All Just Bastards

It took longer than Caleb was hoping to recover from casting the wish spell. Although he was endlessly grateful that he cast it, and that with the weird book on Aeor now locked in a lead box in a demiplane everything seemed to be back to some sense of normalcy, he still felt weak. His disappointment in his slow recovery was aided by the fact that Mollymauk refused to leave his side, skipping shifts at the _Emporium_ and the _Lavish Chateau._ Even though he kept insisting that he was fine, so long as he was unsteady on his feet, Molly was there.

Caleb did enjoy his company of course, but no one had fawned over him like this since he was a small boy. He was used to Veth worrying, but even she had work and Luc and a life that couldn’t be put on hold just for him. It was complicated, since the last person to do this for him was his mother, but he really did appreciate it, at least for the first couple of days. Molly just insisted that now that they never needed to worry about buying groceries with the tower as an option, he could afford to skip a few days of work.

And Caleb didn’t bother to tell him that the bookstore and bakery were doing well enough that Molly could probably retire and become a house spouse. He knew Molly would drive himself crazy with nothing to do, and the extra money just meant, for once in his life, he didn’t have to worry. Making rent payments, phone bills, utilities payments on time, not to mention things like groceries or clothing that he never had leftover money for before, everything that used to fill Caleb with dread, was no longer an issue.

Still, Caleb was eager to get up and around, if not to feel like less of a burden than to at least feel like he was doing something productive with his days. As much as he loved cuddling with Mollymauk, he didn’t quite feel like he was getting enough work done. Molly’s presence was calming in that aspect when he was there, but as Caleb fell asleep each night he worried about how he’d done essentially nothing throughout the day. Once they’d made it through a few nights and Molly regained no eyes, he felt like he needed to move on to another project.

But every time he attempted to express that, he became aware that those weren’t really the feelings and emotions he was supposed to have. He ended up back on Pumat’s couch instead of back at work, trying to accept the fact that he wasn’t a tool, he was allowed to rest, and no one would abandon him if he wasn’t useful. These were things he didn’t really think he needed to unlearn, since he wasn’t hurting anyone, but after he kept straining himself too hard to prove he was fine after casting the wish spell, Molly insisted. On a technicality, Caleb had to give it to him. 

He _was_ hurting himself, technically, by not allowing himself to rest.

It was true, but not something he’d ever considered before. He was used to feeling useful, to feel like he would only receive and be worthy of praise for working as long hours as he could, or trying his best at everything he did. To his parents, to Ikithon, to Astrid and Wulf, to Veth, to whoever would have him. He missed it.

And he was foolish to think that Molly would accept that as a reason he needed to go back to work, and not back to therapy. Somehow, he was grateful to be able to leave the house just to go to Pumat’s, unpacking everything that had happened to him at the Soltryce Academy with the distance of knowing that Ikithon was dead. It wasn’t the work he craved, but it was something.

Caleb was sure that the sessions were helpful, and he was grateful to Pumat as well, but there was something about coming home to the best ever example of hedonism and luxuriating in rest after his sessions that made him feel like it might actually be true. Watching Molly splay over any furniture he happened to be sitting on, eating berries or cakes or painting his fingernails, it was easier to believe there was something to all this. Especially when Molly would look up at him and gin, full of ideas for new ways to rest.

And when those eager red eyes trained on his, he couldn’t exactly say “no,” to Molly wanting to give him a massage. Who could? Or how Molly had miraculously taken up baking his own bread, and other fancy dishes from _The Great Marquesian Baking Show._ How was Caleb supposed to deny the pleasure of eating fresh warm bread leisurely in the kitchen? Or how Molly had ordered him some new novel and needed Caleb to read it to him (despite being quite capable himself, if a bit slower than Caleb). When Molly said he just loved hearing Caleb’s voice, how was he supposed to deny him?

The short answer was that he couldn’t, and so he took what could have equated to a real vacation for the first time in decades.

He wasn’t surprised that the first time he was allowed to leave the apartment in two weeks other than therapy sessions ended up being to go to Yasha and Beau’s engagement party.

It was all awkward as hell, with the bartender at the chosen place being an old flame of Beau’s. Keg was cool about it, casually congratulating Beau on finding someone like Yasha, but no one was expecting to see her. Molly tried to explain to Caleb the intricacies of the interaction and the various kinds of lesbians, but he was completely lost.

Shrugging and drinking a deadly mix of liquor and sugar, Molly proclaimed him some sort of bisexual disaster and let him rest in confused ignorance. It wasn’t a place he liked to stay in, but he was sure that the intricacies of human relationships would always be two steps out of his reach.

So he stayed quiet, enjoying the moment of controlled chaos that was the Mighty Nein at all times. Thoughts about rings dominated his thoughts, even though Beau and Yasha had both decided to just get bands tattooed on their left hands. It was a sweet gesture, one that would prove useful with how often Beau punched things and how often Yasha put her hands in the dirt for her plants. It made sense, though the thought of a needle piercing into his skin again and again still made his skin crawl and think of green crystals and blood. Still, he snuck glances and saw that Molly indeed was wearing the ring he’d gotten him at Winter’s Crest. With his memory he would have remembered if Molly ever went out without it, and he really hadn’t. It seemed promising, though he was still unsure.

When Fjord got Jester a ring a few months later, he started thinking about them again.

Fjord had ordered a big diamond ring to get specially made with sapphires on either side, all housed in bright silvery platinum that went well with Jester’s blue skin. He’d gotten it enchanted too, making sure that whenever she healed it would be the best she could manage, no matter how the fates seemed to be feeling that day. The diamond was also very high quality, enough so to even be used to resurrect someone in case of an emergency despite it being rather small. It was lovely, and Caleb couldn't help but to wonder what he’d get for Mollymauk this time.

He was fairly sure that a diamond was too plain for his tiefling.

Maybe something to match the peacock.

“Caleb, isn’t it pretty?” Jester asked, breaking him out of his little reverie.

Jester was looking at him expectantly, holding her hand out and wiggling her fingers to show off the shining piece. “Ja,” he said, clearing his throat, “it’s breathtaking. And useful.”

She rolled her eyes at the last part, but was pacified enough, moving on to Veth and Molly, the true appreciators of trinkets. Caleb sighed softly at being left out of the scrutiny, taking a swig of his beer and settling further into the loveseat Jester had led him to. In his lap, Frumpkin made biscuits and purred softly, letting Caleb idly run his fingers through his soft fur.

Both Fjord and Jester had opted to forgo the traditional “bridal shower” and “bachelor’s party” since all either of them wanted to do was share a few drinks and play games with the rest of the Nein. And since none of them really adhered to strict gender roles or presentations, no one wanted to split down the lines of who wanted to do frilly things and who wanted to do strange masculine bonding activities. No one really wanted to do either of those things.

It was decided instead that they would play card games where cheating was encouraged and the prize was getting to design a personal cocktail that would be served at their wedding. Jester wasn’t a patient person, and even though Yasha and Beau had gotten engaged first, she and Fjord would beat them to the altar. Partly because Beau and Yasha were saving up for a destination wedding (Caleb had suggested Rumblecusp), and partly because Jester would probably explode with too much anticipation.

Caleb personally felt it was all a bit fast, but he also thought it was rather sweet that Jester wanted them to get married on the anniversary of them getting together (which was a bit earlier than anyone knew, to everyone’s surprise). Traveling together and going through all of the hardships, then finally dealing with Avantika with enough evidence of hre stalkerish behavior to get her behind bars had definitely bonded them quite quickly, not to mention all the help Fjord gave Jester when they first started up the bakery.

They were sweet together, and it wasn’t as if Caleb had known Molly any longer.

He understood, though it still felt strange.

Caduceus seemed a bit lonely now that Fjord had moved in with Jester, but he started picking up shifts at _Divine Delights._ He already was fantastic with people and brewed a mean cup of tea, and Caleb helped him set up a stand of his enchanted teas to sell upstairs along with some of the books from the bookstore downstairs.

That, and Caleb had seen Fjord’s old room. It was _filled_ with plants. Caleb didn’t know that many plants could fit in an apartment. Once the firbolg got used to it and started to entertain more (no one in the Nein could resist the call of Caduceus-made food), he would be just fine.

He was happy for Jester and Fjord too. They all were. Caleb had been a little distracted whenever people started talking about weddings, still unsure as to whether or not asking would be too much establishment and ceremony for Mollymauk. He didn’t want to be too pushy or too forward. Things still did seem fast, even though they’d been through so much. But the thought of bonding them together in a more official way, with a big party and formal wear that Caleb knew Molly would look gorgeous in was tempting. The party might be loud, but it would be all their friends and family, and Molly would love it.

“Cmon, I want to make something with a gross amount of tequila for their wedding. You can count cards and I’ll slip you good ones when no one’s looking.” Molly interrupted his train of thought extending a hand.

Caleb laughed softly, but let Molly drag him to the table. He sent Frumpkin to sit behind Jester, since she was the real competition, other than Veth, who would have called him out on the familiar sneaking peeks. This was exactly what they’d done together in the Empire when they needed to swindle people out of money in order to eat, and she knew it well.

But Veth just winked at him. “Hello, traitor.”

“Hallo, Veth. I’d really rather not the signature drink be all whiskey. This wedding will be loud enough as is.” Caleb set his beer down and slipped into the seat Molly pulled out for him. Better to voice his alliances, even though she'd correctly assumed.

Molly grinned and kissed his cheek. “If you help me win, I’ll make sure people get sleepy drunk, not loud drunk.”

He sighed softly but let Molly pull their chairs close together. With their knees touching, it would be much easier for him to slip Caleb cards. Veth’s mage hand was a thing to be feared, but Caleb also knew all her tricks. As far as he was concerned, he and Molly were the most formidable team. Jester was a menace, but Fjord would try to help and he was not the best at sleight of hand. Veth was just as good, if not better, but she was working alone and very intoxicated. Yasha was mostly just surprised people were cheating and she couldn’t tell, and Beau wasn’t good enough at poker to be a real threat, despite vehemently claiming otherwise.

The game dragged on for a while, stakes getting raised and drinks being had. Caduceus had chosen not to play

It was no surprise when he and Molly won a few hours later, the perfect team.

“Frumpkin,” Jester said sadly, holding up the disgruntled cat, “next time you have to be on my team.”

Molly laughed, happy and jotting down his signature cocktail on a napkin. “You picked the wrong caster to marry for that, dear. And did you really want to design a drink for your wedding? It is _your_ wedding, you can design as many signature cocktails as you’d like.”

Her eyes widened. “Oh my gosh, you’re totally right! I forgot that all the bartenders at the _Chateau_ already love me!”

Molly rolled his eyes at that, snaking his arm around Caleb’s waist. “Everyone loves you, Jester. But that lasted like four hours with Veth raising the stakes at every possible second.”

“Just because you won doesn’t mean you didn’t also raise the stakes!” Veth huffed, still upset that she had to bring Molly and Caleb breakfast at work all this week for losing.

He grinned, resplendent in his joy at winning. Caleb was far too in love, just staring as he spoke. “I never said I didn’t. See you tomorrow, with breakfast.”

“Fuck you, Tealeaf.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> people were asking what kind of stuff I might be interested in next so I thought I'd list some wips and gauge interest?
> 
> -Pacific Rim Shadowgast AU  
> -Widomauk fic where the M9 comes together to break Bren/Caleb out of the Vergesson Sanatorium  
> -Canon divergence Shadogast where Caleb doesn't recover from his amnesia on Rumblecusp and they go to Essek for help  
> -Molly/Caleb/Essek fic set in the feywild where Molly (and most of the M9) is a trooping fairy and Essek is from the Winter/Unseelie Court, and Caleb accidentally plane shifts there from the sanatorium with the dodecahedron  
> -College Shadowgast AU (with magic)  
> -College Widomauk AU (without magic, with pseudo-soulmate dreams of canon stuff)


	108. Lucien is Dead

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Molly likes distracting Caleb

### Chapter 108: Lucien is Dead

Molly was pretty sure his friends were maniacs.

Not that the Mighty Nein ever did anything half-assed. Or carefully. Or very slowly.

It made a strange kind of sense that Yasha would propose to Beau. And that Fjord would ask Jester to marry him a few months later. It felt right.

Like it might feel right for Molly to buy Caleb a ring, get down on one knee and beg him to spend the rest of his life putting up with his insanity. He already couldn’t imagine his life without Caleb at his side, or in their apartment when he came home from a tough day of work, or occasionally making his way across the street to the _Emporium_ with a cup of coffee and his perfect smile.

They’d both started working less, with the lack of need for groceries, and apparently with how well the bakery was doing. That and with his blood magic leaving him behind left him lacking anything to backup the name “Ice Spinner.” He could tell Caleb had always been a little worried about the scars too, looking back. Molly might not have had any bad associations with them, but Caleb certainly did, even with all his therapy.

It’d taken a lot of convincing to get Caleb back in Pumat’s one-on-one sessions, but Molly had managed. And then he did his best to make the rest of the day as lighthearted and fun as possible. Caleb had come home drained and drawn out looking the first few weeks, and it just broke Molly’s heart. He’d eventually called Caduceus for advice, when movies and pillow forts and cuddles didn’t quite do the trick. 

“Ah, he gets lost in his own head, his own memories sometimes after a session. Something more distracting might help. A change of scenery or something he has to focus on,” Caduceus had said, rubbing his chin. Well, Molly assumed he was rubbing his chin. He usually did when he had that pensive, thinking tone.

So therapy days had become date nights, and if Molly excelled in anything, it was being distracting.

He had taken Caleb to every museum in the city, demanding to be told every strange trivia fact that Caleb knew about every exhibit. Then they’d visited every place nearby that had animals, mostly for Molly’s own pleasure. There was nothing quite like watching Caleb being completely baffled by how animals other than Frumpkin acted, especially whenever those places had a touch tank or a petting zoo. Watching him try to understand how all his various facts about these animals added up to nothing when he came face to face with anything that wasn’t basically a cat.

After that, Molly began scheduling classes. So long as Caleb was in a position to learn something new, he was more than eager to put aside his work. And so long as whatever he was learning was something creative, Molly was happy. Cooking classes, pottery class, and sewing classes were fun, but he and Caleb were pretty terrible at them. Molly had gotten better at cooking, but he would probably never be patient enough to really be good at it. Caleb was good at following the recipes, but a bit clumsy when it came to the execution.

They were similar in the other two classes. Molly could get the spirit of it, and Caleb could follow the directions, but there was some disconnect in execution on both parts. Molly had never been good at following a pattern and resolved to never try again.

Molly loved the couples massage classes, and he thought he was getting quite good, but he knew after the first few that Caleb wasn’t exactly warming up to the idea. That and the last time he gave Caleb a massage back at home, Caleb had practically told him he was a gift from the gods. Well, not practically. Literally. Along with a whole host of other things, and moans that weren’t meant for anything but their bedroom. He wasn’t sure he had much else to learn, and he was never in such need for Caleb to work knots out of his back. He was more than happy with a light massage from his favorite human that usually descended into dirty things, since he spent most of it moaning as obscenely as possible to see how embarrassed he could make Caleb. Those weren’t really skills to hone in public.

Ah, but the dancing classes? He would take those forever. As soon as he got Caleb in a pressed button down and himself in the flowiest skirt he could find, they were thrust back in time to elegant cotillions and masquerade balls. They went from beginner ballroom dance lessons all the way to expert, and then Molly found three different teachers for different expert classes after that. It wasn’t his fault that Caleb looked so goddamn happy when they were twirling around the room like fairies.

But now they’d been to every ballroom dance coach in the city, and learned just about everything they could know about dancing. Molly was definitely planning on having a big masquerade ball for his next birthday, now that he knew Caleb could design the tower to have a ballroom (he’d done it once for them just to practice). He was keeping an eye out for any new teachers coming to town, but that was exhausted for now.

It was harder to plan weekly, incredibly distracting dates than he thought.

But Jester had been raving about a place downtown, near Pumat’s thankfully, that you could go and have a painting lesson, complete with a full bar. She’d been begging Molly to go for ages, and he finally relented, so long as he could bring Caleb. It sounded like it wasn’t that loud, but it had alcohol, and that was probably enough for the man to relax for a minute.

That and it was nearly impossible for Caleb to retreat in on himself when completely surrounded by the rest of the Mighty Nein.

So Molly was on his way there now, walking from west to east across the city and looking through some of the wedding photos that Jester had sent him that morning. She looked amazing, all white lace and blue accents, and he looked just as good, if he did so say himself. He’d gotten the honor of being in her wedding party (along with the rest of the Nein), and the light blue slinky dress she’d picked out for him had turned Caleb pink for a solid half hour. And then again in five minute increments every time they touched throughout the night.

They’d just split the group in half for who wanted to wear a dress and who wanted to wear a suit. There was no real need to make distinctions beyond that, since they were all friends. And goddamn if Caleb didn’t look amazing in that navy blue suit. Beau and Cad had looked lovely too, and Yasha and Veth were wearing similar dresses to him, but Molly really only had eyes for Caleb.

Caleb who, according to these wedding photos, hadn’t stopped staring at him all night. The look on his face was so goddamn tender Molly could have cried on the sidewalk. The photographer Reani had recommended had been perfect, capturing the look of pure bliss on Caleb’s face as they showed off all their ballroom dance moves, and hundreds of little moments Molly hadn’t been paying close enough attention to.

Caleb tenderly brushing the hair out of his eyes. Caleb dipping him with a mischievous grin on the dance floor. Caleb dancing with Veth on his shoes, and then Kiri doing the same in her little white flower girl dress. Caleb looking at Molly like he was the sun as he talked with Jester, unaware that there were eyes on him.

“Lucien?”

His train of thought was derailed into a screeching pile of metal and smoke. All the warmth left his body as he heard that name.

The name alone struck fear into his heart, and the thought of turning around and facing this made his skin crawl. But he was good at this. Good at lying. Good at secretly dealing with any issues. The first plan was to just keep walking. He wasn’t Lucien, and he hardly looked like the bastard anymore either. More tattoos, more strength, and much, much more color. He doubted the weirdass cultist would have dyed his hair like this either.

A hand caught his arm, turning him to the side to see a halfling woman frowning up at him. “Lucien, where have you- Oh, sorry.”

He blinked, surprised for half a second before regaining composure. Thank the Moonweaver, it was working. It was really working. “That’s alright, stranger. Can I help you?” he asked, abandoning his accent entirely and trying to sound as bland as possible.

“I-No, I just…” she trailed off, looking at him carefully and then down at his hand, now blooming with a slightly more red orange than pure red flower in front of the snake. An amaryllis meaning determination, beauty, and love. It was red around the edges, but a beautiful bright orange color on the inside. Completely different than what she was expecting. “Sorry, sir. You just look quite familiar.”

“Ah, all tieflings look alike right?” he asked, rolling his eyes. The more offended he acted, the sooner he could get the fuck away from here.

She shook her head, “No, no- I- I’m sorry.” She took another long , hard look at him, one that made his skin crawl again, like beetles had forced their way under his skin like some disgusting horror movie Beau would like. But he stood his ground, looking back innocently. He wasn't lying; he’d never seen her before in his life. 

Continuing to shake her head, she walked away, mumbling, “Sorry to have bothered you.”

And then she was gone.

It had worked.

In that moment, Lucien was really and truly dead, and Molly felt like he could breathe.

He walked quickly away to the other direction thankful that it was actually the direction he needed to go. It would have been difficult to explain why he was late without falling apart.

His fingers instinctually found their way to his necklace, feeling over the moon lying at the base of his throat. He wanted to feel the bloom of warmth that meant Caleb was thinking about him, beyond the swell of adrenaline now working its way through his body. If he was thinking more clearly he might have waited. It would only be a few minutes before he saw Caleb at most, and he was definitely not sending the best emotions through their link.

But his chest exploded with the warmth from their connection, compassion and concern for him swelling over Molly like a wave. A very reassuring wave that helped push down some of the anxiety building in his gut.

Of course, reality crashed down with it, along with vibrations in his pocket. Caleb’s number and name flashed across his phone screen and he answered it quickly.

“Hey, I’m fine. I’ll explain in a minute.”

Molly could hear the audible sigh of relief. “You’re alright?”

“Promise. Just a little,” Molly paused, searching for the right word, “keyed up, I guess. I’ll explain when I- Oh, hi there handsome.”

Caleb frowned at his phone as he heard Molly’s voice twice, then turned to see him walking straight towards him, hanging up his own phone. Before Molly knew it, he was being hugged, Caleb hiding in the crook of his neck for a moment. It really probably wasn’t the best time to startle him with something like this, right after he was dwelling on his past during therapy.

“You’re really okay?”

Molly nodded, kissing Caleb’s temple. “Thanks to you.”

“How so?” Caleb asked, frown audible. Molly looked at his phone again. They had a minute before the class started, even though he could see Jester and Veth inside already. 

“Well,” he said, unsure how exactly to phrase it, “someone thought they recognized me. And then changed their mind.”

“Oh,” Caleb said, pulling back with a bit of a confused look. As soon as he met Molly’s eyes, his own widened. _”Oh.”_

“Yeah,” Molly breathed, sighing softly as the adrenaline started to fade.

“And you’re okay? They just realized you weren’t who they thought and walked away?” Caleb asked, rubbing his cheek carefully, as if somehow the visitor from Lucien’s past might have made the tattoos reappear.

“I’m wonderful,” Molly promised, cupping Caleb’s cheek in turn and pulling him in for a quick kiss. He could see Veth pretending to retch from inside the little painting studio, but he couldn’t be bothered.

He was himself and none other, and he needed to kiss the man who made it happen.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so glad you guys like the ideas/wips I listed on the last chapter! I had no idea so many people were even following this ridiculous story. Please know that your comments all give me instant doses of much needed serotonin <3
> 
> (since I'm a glutton for punishment I'll probably start posting each story weekly, but just work on seven different stories... idk I think it'd feel weird not to post something every day, at least for a little while)


	109. The Worst Day of the Year

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> For Caleb, it's the worst day of the year. Molly's there to help him through.

### Chapter 109: The Worst Day of the Year

Caleb liked to hide. Therefore he owned a myriad of turtlenecks and scarves. He was particularly grateful for that this morning when he had pulled a deep hunter green turtleneck over his neck, now decorated in little lovebites from Molly. In most relationships he’d read about, the teasing and the fire and the passion steadied out into a low flame compared to the blaze of a honeymoon phase. It was something romance novels loved to talk about, how most “normal” relationships fizzled out and stayed rather stagnant after a time, and how the romance from the book was special and perpetually hot and heavy and wild.

Though Caleb supposed there was some merit to those silly observations, like how he was less caught off guard by how wonderfully kind Molly always managed to be, or how he was less embarrassed about certain forms of pda, but he still felt like the fire was burning bright. Part of that could have been that Molly was ridiculously gorgeous in a way that he’d never get used to. But really, they were just finding routine and comfort in living their lives alongside each other. Molly might not have given him butterflies quite like he used to, but considering how close that felt to anxiety, Caleb wasn’t sure that was exactly preferable.

So there was no massive passionate bonfire, one night only and exciting and fresh.

But there was a roaring fire in the hearth, comforting and constant. They could throw a log on and stay warm for ages. Molly could bring him coffee in the morning and Caleb would stay in a good mood for the rest of the day with just the thought that Molly had thought of him.

It felt like something his parents had. A warmth that just exuded love.

Molly was doing something… different with his hair lately. It had been getting longer, but now the tips were dyed a slightly lighter purple, curling gently over his ears and horns and brushing his shoulders. He’d gone to the tattoo shop a few times over the past few months, getting new flowers and gaps filled into the places the now absent eyes left behind.

Everything about him took Caleb's breath away.

Even today.

The worst day of the year.

Even today, sitting in decades old guilt, he could appreciate Molly in his gingham purple dress with his new hair, folding up a matching picnic blanket. It was patterned and loud, and would fit in well with all the flowers Caleb had planted over the past two years.

Molly knew what to expect now, since he’d gone with Caleb last year.

This year he’d planned a few things, just in case. Last year Caleb hadn’t really known what to say, so this year Molly was bringing along the new pictures from Beau and Yasha’s wedding out on the beach at Rumblecusp. He was making them a wedding album in a scrapbook like he’d done for Jester. Yasha might have asked him to make one once she saw how he dried Jester’s bouquet for the cover, but he’d offered as soon as he saw her looking at it.

He was just sweet like that.

Like how Caleb hadn’t had to ask for help making the picnic. Molly came to him a week ago and asked if Caleb wanted sandwiches or something less traditional, making up a menu and taking him to the grocery store to buy little premade packages of potato salad and whoopie pies. It wasn’t something Caleb had the energy to deal with, and Molly knew he did.

And Caleb was working on believing he could deserve Molly’s attention and affection. Molly wanted to plan the picnic, wanted to be kind and do that for Caleb. Just like how Caleb always offered to be the one to vacuum and rinse the dishes before loading the dishwasher since Molly hated those chores. Or how Caleb would bring Molly lunch whenever he worked at the _Emporium,_ because Jester was always eager to make something the two tieflings called “interesting.” Or picked up just about any little trinket he saw on a street cart if it had a moon on it, just because it reminded him of Molly.

It was a healthy give and take, even though Caleb had to take a few extra moments to work through his guilt each time.

So Molly began to set up their blanket in the quiet and they listened to the birds chirping around the garden of Caleb’s old home. The forest continued to consume the foundation with its vines and moss, but the garden remained well maintained. Caleb sometimes slipped away here and spent time scouring through old gardening books. The herb garden was growing well, Empire favorites he occasionally brought to Caduceus. Roses were now a second language to him, and he took a moment to pull off a few of the bloomed out buds off so more would grow.

Before Molly could settle in, he held out a hand.

“Actually, I have a spell in mind,” he said softly, chewing his lip. “Meine Mutter always wanted a gazebo, but I wasn’t skilled enough and Vater never had time.”

“A gazebo?” Molly asked, cocking his head.

Caleb only nodded, taking Molly’s hand with his left and raising his right to wave over some of the trees that were getting a bit too close to the garden. He felt the wood bend and twist to his will, shaping itself into a perfect replica of the gazebo his mother had sketched on the back of a napkin when he was about eleven years old. The branches bowed and twirled, wrapping themselves into a sort of lattice that would continue to grow but in a more localized, controlled way. A way that wouldn’t get too close to his Mother’s roses.

He added a few things, the biggest being a circular table in the middle for Molly to spread out his picnic blanket, and work more comfortably on the scrapbook. If Caleb wanted to spend the day here, he could at least make sure Molly wasn’t uncomfortable.

“It’s beautiful, Caleb,” Molly murmured, still impressed with his magic even though he cast a fair amount of spells just about every day. Each time he heard that tone in Molly’s voice his chest swelled a bit with pride. That and the unsaid words that were present in Molly’s tone, _She would have loved it,_ were enough to bring a light sting of tears to his eyes.

Ignoring that feeling and trying to focus on the warmth he stepped up to sit at the little table. Molly spread out the picnic blanket here, and got out two small bottles of lemonade. It was early yet, for lunch, so he just pulled out the scrapbook for Yasha and Beau.

“It was nice of Thoreau Jr. to show up. I’m not sure I’ve ever seen Beau cry.” Molly flipped through the big stack of photos he’d brought, pausing over the one with the embrace between sister and brother.

Caleb nodded and looked at the image. He was glad Beau at least had one family member who wasn’t an asshole, even though her found family was pretty fantastic, at least from his point of view. She would always be a sister to him. “How he figured out we were all in Rumblecusp I have no idea. But I’m glad he came.”

“Well, Yasha had something to do with it. And Veth and Jester. You know neither of them can ever leave well enough alone.” Molly flipped to the next picture of Jester hastily fixing Beau’s makeup.

Caleb smiled. “Very true. Did you know when we first met they tried to reconnect me with Astrid because they thought she was my long lost love?”

“Oh my gods, really?” Molly asked, covering up a snort. “How’d that go?”

“I mean I think you can imagine how I felt about it. But they didn’t say anything about me. They just set a letter to the academy saying Astrid’s uncle had died and she should contact them if she wanted to collect the inheritance.” Caleb sighed, tracing the grain of the wood under his seat. It was smooth enough. He’d done a good job with the fabrication.

Molly laughed softly, pulling out another picture of Veth squishing both of Luc’s cheeks as she prepared him for his job as flower boy. “That sounds like them, for sure.”

“Frankly, I’m extremely lucky that Astrid hated Ikithon as much as I did. She probably could have traced it back to me and turned me over on the spot.” Caleb took the picture of Veth and Luc, smiling at the one underneath it of Yeza holding Luc in his little blue dress while kissing Veth on the cheek.

Molly shuddered at the thought though. “Well, I’m glad she didn’t.”

“It benefited her more not to, I suppose. I hear they’re doing well. Her and Wulf. Started up a committee of students and staff at the Academy to enact some positive change.”

He rolled his eyes. “Hopefully that change includes therapy. For like, everyone.”

Caleb might have laughed if it wasn’t the anniversary of his parent’s death. “I’m sure that’s on the list.”

“Better be.” Molly started slipping a photo of Yasha holding Beau up in the air into the sleeve of the first page. Then he grabbed one of himself and Beau, both somehow with the other in a headlock. She’d been training him to fight when they were both free, teaching him how to stun people and fight with his fists instead of a sword. It was nice, and something for the two of them to get their energy out with, but Caleb could really have done without Molly knowing how to stun him long enough to carry him to bed if he thought Caleb had been up reading too late. Caleb looked away from the photo and out across the small lawn.

Molly was quiet for a few minutes, letting Caleb’s mind wander and fill the garden with images of his father coming home from work and playing around with him, his mother sitting at her rosebush or the vegetable garden and weeding the hours away, the three of them lying out in the grass and letting him point out new constellations he’d learned from a book.

When he spoke again, he was filling a page with pictures of Thoreau Jr. and Beau laughing, sharing an awkward dance, and hugging. “Would you… Would you feel differently now? About Veth and Jester reaching out to Astrid? Or Wulf? Like if we… had a big anniversary party or something?”

There was a strange pause before Molly said anniversary party that confused Caleb. He was clearly thinking about something else, but he couldn't put his finger on it.

“I’m not sure. They were an important part of my life, for sure, but I think I’d rather keep those things separate,” he mused, twisting the cap of his lemonade like a top.

Molly nodded, focusing intently on sticking in a picture of Yasha spinning him around on the dance floor. Caleb stopped his lid to stare at the way Molly’s blue skirt flared out, a moment in time immortalized on the page. He remembered exactly what the flowy skirt felt like under his touch, silky and smooth, encouraging him to dance far more than he might have. His feet had ached the rest of the week, but it was worth it.

Beside him, Molly had moved on to rub his thumb over another picture, Caleb catching him mid dip and the photographer capturing the moment as they both laughed. The corners of Molly’s eyes were crinkled and his smile was as beautiful as anything Caleb had ever seen. He looked enamored, not half as beautiful as the tiefling in his arms, but still nice enough. He’d just worn the suit they’d bought for Jester’s wedding without the jacket. The navy blue vest over a simple gray shirt fit Beau’s dress code of “no crocs, no hawaiian shirts, and no nudity.”

“I have a little something for you.” Molly said, breaking the silence again.

“Oh?” Caleb asked, broken out of his reverie, staring at the photo and moving to look in Molly’s eyes.

He nodded, “It’s nothing big. Just a little something. You remember last year when you made all those little figures of them?” His parents, Caleb thought. He’d made an illusion to show Molly the scenes up close and not just over the pixelated facetime camera.

“Ja,” he said softly, wondering if he should do the same today. Last year he’d added color to the little amber figures, bringing them further to life.

Molly pulled something out of his pocket, wrapped in shiny teal paper, “Well, I took some pictures of them, and had Jester whip something up for me. Us. You. You know what I mean. Open it.” He pushed it closer.

Caleb fumbled with the paper, nearly slicing his finger open with his dry skin, but managed to pull out a simple box. Inside rested what appeared to be a pocketwatch, gold and simple with a little ring of vines twisting around the outer rim. Looking closer, they were roses. He popped it open, and all the tears he’d been holding back threatened to brim over as his breath caught in his throat.

Always nervous when giving gifts, Molly was beginning to ramble. “I asked Jester to paint their portrait for you, but I couldn’t figure out what to put on the other side since you can always tell the time anyways. I thought maybe a compass, but you always know where north is too, so I went with that picture. I know it might seem a little egotistical, but Jester said it was probably fine, we can take that one out and put in another if you want-”

Caleb couldn’t stop staring at the little pictures inside. His family, his mother and father and himself as a young boy, probably five or six, were painted in fine detail on the right side. And on the left was a painted version of the picture of Molly kissing his cheek with Frumpkin in their lap, batting at a ribbon during their housewarming party. The tears came and didn’t stop as Molly finally silenced his worries and just surged forward to hug him.

It was still the worst day of the year, by far. But being here with Molly almost made it okay.

Choking back a sob, Caleb spoke quietly into the crook of Molly’s neck, “It’s perfect.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so glad people seem so interested in the ideas I posted; you all are really too sweet. I know it seems like I'm setting myself a crazy schedule, but it makes my day to see everyone's comments. I've been stuck in a pretty strict quarantine since March and I'm going a little crazy, so I'd probably be writing or creating anyways. It's a pleasure to share it with you all, and please know every comment makes me smile <3


	110. Tax Purposes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some fluff because this episode is murdering my soul

### Chapter 110: Tax Purposes

“Mollymauk?”

Molly lifted his head to peer at Caleb across the couch, a brow raised to show his concern. He usually only used Molly’s full name these days when he was deep in thought. 

That, and Caleb had been fretting about something all week. Ever since they’d come back from his mother's garden and shared the anniversary of the day Caleb’s parents died, there had clearly been something on his mind. Molly had no idea what it was, but could see the subtle fidgeting and furrowed brows whenever Caleb thought he wasn't looking. Which meant it had something to do with him.

He asked Veth and Caduceus about it, and even Beau and Jester, and everyone he could think of who Caleb might ask advice from, but no one else knew anything either. Which meant Caleb thought whatever it was, was bad. Or at least had potentially bad consequences. And knowing Caleb, that probably meant it stemmed from some horrible level of guilt that Molly desperately wanted to know about and counteract.

Though he'd learned from rather frustrating experiences not to just try and get Caleb to tell him what was wrong. The moment Molly asked, he'd retreat in on himself and insist nothing was wrong. It'd take another week or three for him to open up afterwards. There were still aspects to dating his wizard that felt like he was trying to win over a wild animal. Incredibly rewarding and lovely, but still very frustrating from time to time. As much as he wanted to help and pick apart what Caleb was worried about, it wouldn’t do anything to help if Caleb wasn’t ready to talk about it.

So Molly waited, as patiently as he was able, and it sounded like it had paid off.

“Something wrong, dearheart?”

“Nein,” he said quickly, grabbing Molly’s hand as reassurance but not meeting his eyes as they curled up together on the couch, his documentary momentarily forgotten. “I was just thinking…”

Grinning, Molly set his phone down and moved closer. Finally. “And what has that marvelous brain been thinking about?”

Caleb rolled his eyes, but he leaned into the touch and tucked his head under Molly's chin. At least him getting closer probably meant he wasn't too worried about Molly’s reaction. It always hurt when he flinched away from Molly’s touch. He began to fiddle with the hem of his shirt and said, “We’ve been living together for quite some time now, and I believe it has been quite enjoyable for the both of us, ja?”

“An understatement, if anything, dear.” Molly wrapped his arms around his nervous wizard, trying to calm his nerves.

He nodded and continued, but his words only added to Molly’s confusion. He was having trouble seeing the issue here. “We’re not rich folks, by any means, though we’re comfortable. I’m comfortable, I-I was just wondering…”

Molly pulled up their entwined hands to kiss the back of Caleb’s. “Take your time, but you don’t have to be nervous. I doubt there’s anything you could say to scare me away at this point.”

Caleb swallowed, his eyes still darting nervously around the room though he gently squeezed Molly’s fingers back. “Of course. I… I was thinking about how little sense it makes to keep our… our partnership off the records. For tax purposes. It’s only rational to complete the paperwork and make things official.”

“For tax purposes?” Molly echoed, watching Caleb nod and the pink rising up to stain his cheeks. “Wait… You want to…” his eyes widened as he tipped up Caleb’s chin so he could look at him.

The blue eyes were nervous, sure, but there was a sparkle of hope in them that made Molly’s heart lurch.

“Are… are you proposing?” he asked, still holding Caleb’s cheek.

He nodded again, the spark growing.

Molly swallowed. “For tax purposes?”

Caleb flushed a deeper pink and looked away again. “Ja.”

“What if I want to get married for other purposes?” Molly asked, a slow smile spreading across his cheeks so wide it almost hurt.

Caleb looked back up at him, nodding again with that sparkle of hope growing every second. “That would… that would certainly be amenable.”

“What if I wanted to get married because you’re the most lovely man in Exandria and I love you more than my heart can contain? Or because you’re the most gorgeous person I’ve ever laid eyes on? Or because you’re kinder than anyone I know?” Molly felt his grin stretch at his cheeks, threatening to ache.

“I, um, well,” Caleb trailed off, looking down again and blushing up a storm, even though he’d been the one to bring it up.

“Did you really think I’d say no?” Molly asked, rubbing at his cheek and thoroughly unable to stop smiling.

The slight lift of Caleb’s sweater clad shoulders started Molly’s heart to aching. “I wasn’t sure. You are not… the most traditional kind of person. I didn’t know how you felt about the institution. I thought perhaps you would bring it up when we attended Beau and Yasha’s wedding, or Jester and Fjord’s, though that was quite early. Clarabelle’s engagement started me thinking about it again.”

“I’ve been thinking about it, I just didn’t want to pressure you. Our friends moved crazy fast, and I know you and I moved in together way too quickly. I mean, I’m ecstatic that you can tolerate the worst roommate in all of Nicodranas, possibly Wildemount-” Caleb rolled his eyes, but Molly knew it was true, “but it really was fast.”

He nodded, still smiling softly. His cheeks were still tinged a delicious pink and it was spreading to the tops of his ears too. Molly was ridiculously in love. “Well, I’m glad I said something. I don’t think it’s too soon now.”

“Well, for tax purposes, I suppose it makes sense,” Molly said seriously, managing to school his expression into a serious one only for a second before he kissed Caleb.

Before he kissed his fiancé.

His _fiancé._

For tax purposes.

And more.

So much more. 

“So you got to propose,” Molly murmured, pulling Caleb to sit fully in his lap and resting his chin on the wizard’s head. It was his favorite way to watch television these days, since Caleb was so warm. “Now it’s my turn. I hope you’re prepared for something cheesy as hell.”

“I did plan on something, well, more, once I got a ring,” Caleb said, a little muffled by Molly’s grip around him.

Molly couldn’t wipe the smile off his face if he tried. “Good. Put all those romance novels to good use. Of course, you realize now it’s a competition.”

“If it’s measured in terms of pure ostentation, I’m afraid I’m at a severe disadvantage.” Caleb shifted in Molly’s lap to lean his head on Molly’s shoulder and tangle his fingers in his hair.

He shook his head, wary of the horns, and turned to kiss Caleb’s forehead. “No, it’ll be how perfect it is for the other person. And afterwards we’ll tell… Jester and Veth the whole story of both so they can judge which one was better.”

“And a neutral party, bitte,” Caleb said, rolling his eyes. Of course Molly couldn’t see that, but he could hear it in his voice.

Molly chuckled, nodding, “Caduceus then. As a tiebreaker.”

Caleb turned and sat up with a wicked glint in his eye as he kissed Molly’s nose. “Viel glück, Liebling.”

“Good luck to you too.”

He pulled him back in for a deeper kiss that just devolved into giggles. "Fiancé," he said, just to hear it out loud.

Caleb grinned back at him, just as love drunk and smitten looking as he had a year ago. And two years ago, but there was no shame and guilt on his face now. Only love. “Fiancé,” he repeated back.

“I’m going to make the best wedding pinterest board the world has ever seen,” Molly said, already thinking about colors. Not that he wanted to pick any particular ones, he was just thinking about all the colors.

Caleb laughed softly, kissing Molly’s nose again. “I have no idea what that means, but you can show me.”

“Jester and Veth are going to have a field day, you know,” Molly warned, already very eager to share the pinterest board with Jester for advice. She would have amazing ideas, he was sure.

Sighing, Caleb nodded, “So long as you are both very descriptive, I should be able to make whatever you desire in the tower. If that’s what you’d like. It would certainly cut down on costs.”

Molly began to imagine the most extravagant wedding he could think of, eyes alight. He pulled Caleb around so he was sitting sideways in his lap, legs stretched out across the couch. That way he could hold him close but still let Caleb continue to watch the documentary on the making of Allura Vysoren’s new book. Molly had been watching too, mostly for glimpses of Allura’s adorable interactions with her wife, but he was very grateful for this new distraction. “I’m going to have to watch all those stupid wedding shows. You know, for inspiration.”

He hummed in Molly’s lap, nuzzling closer. Molly could feel his eyelashes brush against his neck, sending a shiver down his spine as Caleb got comfortable and said, “I’ll need to get more distracting books, to not go mad from all the reality television.”

Laughing softly, Molly started chewing his lip, letting Caleb go back to watching the documentary while he thought about if there should be a theme, or if he should just attempt to inject as much color as possible into every aspect of the wedding. Yasha would be able to help him pick out some amazing kinds of flowers that Caleb could set up in the tower. Caduceus too, probably, though he didn’t seem like quite a party planner. Maybe he’d want to live vicariously through them though, since he himself didn’t want to get married, and would probably end up murdering Clarabelle if they tried to plan a big event together. All the Mighty Nein could help, if they wanted to. It was going to be spectacular, no matter what.

“I thought I’d have to ask you about all this in like, five years,” Molly admitted.

He said, “Well I’m glad you’re thinking about being with me five years down the line.”

“Since I just promised to be yours forever, I think five years is a given, dear,” Molly purred, unable to stop himself from peppering the top of Caleb’s head with kisses.

Caleb chuckled softly, his breath rushing over Molly’s chest and warming him just like the necklace would. He didn’t need a magic link to feel the overwhelming amount of love. “I think I’d have to study a lot more dunamancy to get us to forever, but I’d be willing to give it a shot.”

“Oh, we can grow old together here, with the rest of our friends. I bet your hair will look stunning as it grays. I wonder if mine will do that,” Molly mused, running his hands through the red locks he so adored and imagining them streaked with distinguished gray.

Caleb nodded into his neck, winding his hand in Molly’s. “Perhaps we can get buried together at the Blooming Grove. That’s almost like forever.”

“Ah, we’ll just have our souls find each other in the next plane. What is it that Caduceus says? ‘Death is just a pause?’ It’s just on to another adventure, right?” he said, knowing that someday, they’d all find each other again. He’d never stop until he had his whole family, forever.

“Onward and upward,” Caleb mumbled, and Molly could feel his smile against the column of his neck.

They fell quiet again as Allura kissed her wife on the cheek and talked about how difficult it was to be away from Kima while researching. 

“Fiancé,” Molly mumbled again, voice muffled by his lips pressed into Caleb’s hair.

He earned a light kiss to his collarbone, and couldn’t help himself. “Mine.”

“Forever,” Caleb, mumbled back.

Molly pulled him tighter, “Forever.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> anyone watching tonight's episode please feel free to scream at me (in comments or @calebneedsahug on tumblr) because my adrenaline is murdering me
> 
> some amazing [fanart](https://awesomefrogofawesome.tumblr.com/post/642265707219992576/every-night-for-a-few-weeks-now-ive-been-rea) of this chapter by [AwesomeFroggy](https://archiveofourown.org/users/AwesomeFroggy/pseuds/AwesomeFroggy) !!!!!!!


	111. Die Katzenhochzeit

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Soft, soft, soft

### Chapter 111: Die Katzenhochzeit

Caleb was over the moon.

Every morning when he woke up over the past few weeks, Molly would snuggle close and whisper, “Fiancé,” just in love with the word and concept itself. The fact that they wanted to make this as real as possible, to show off to the world that they meant forever, was all wrapped up in just one word. 

It had been a while since Caleb’s impromptu proposal, and they had decided not to tell anyone until they both officially proposed to each other. Caleb had his plans in order for his proposal for Molly, but the personalized ring was taking quite a while to procure. That and the date he was waiting for was in autumn. The summer days weren’t stretching quite as long now that his birthday had passed, but they were still warm and lazy in Nicodranas.

Molly had started a weekly tradition of doing something distracting right after Caleb had a therapy session, and it had transformed into a comfortable routine date night. But today Caleb was headed back early, having gotten halfway downtown before Pumat called to cancel. Some last minute issue, but nothing for Caleb to worry about too much. He did wonder if Pumat would actually tell him if there was something horrible going on, but it wasn’t his place to pry. They agreed to meet for their regular session next week and Caleb turned to catch the subway back uptown. At least he saved a few gold on the return trip.

The extra time would give him a chance to finally clean the hall closet before Molly’s planned picnic that evening. He was thinking of just taking everything out and enchanting it into a demiplane since no matter what he and Molly did, it just seemed to get cluttered and unorganized within a month. He wanted to make it into a closet of holding, but he was unsure if he’d ever actually remember what he put inside. That and it had the fuse box inside, and all the protective wards. He didn't actually want to mess with that, even though he was dreading just organizing it again.

But when he came home, Molly’s tail was flicking in and out of the closet door already, his hair pulled back into a ponytail that was so cute Caleb couldn’t stop smiling. How he’d gotten so lucky to be with Mollymauk, he’d never know. His purple curls were still unruly, some escaping to frame his face as he pulled out to see what the sound was. Even over the music playing their favorite Infernal band, he could hear the front door opening. “Hey! Look what I found while I was shopping this morning,” he grinned, waving Caleb over.

Caleb peeked into the closet and saw a cardboard box, with an itemized list of random crap on the side. “It’s like a bag of holding, but for moving. It lists all the stuff you put in it so you can’t forget it. Now this closet will actually make sense and you’ll stop hitting your head on hangers when you check the fuse box,” Molly said, waving to show his new purchase with flourish.

Blinking at the perfect solution to his problem, Caleb just stared for a moment. “How did you know it was bothering me?”

“Because you check the wards every day and grumble in Zemnian the entire time because this closet is a pit, dear,” Molly laughed softly, kissing his cheek. “I started the laundry too, but once it’s all in the dryer we can have our picnic.”

Caleb hummed, wrapping his arm around Molly’s waist, “We don’t have to go early. You made me eat before I left for Pumat’s.”

“Oh, yeah, you are really early,” Molly said, frowning at his phone’s clock. He sounded… off.

Raising a brow, Caleb looked carefully at Molly’s strange expression, but he just turned and disappeared down the hallway before Caleb could really make anything out. Oh well. He wouldn’t pry. If Molly wanted to talk, he’d let him know.

“I got you something else too, in the work room,” Molly called, presumably busying himself with some other chore in the living room.

Caleb wandered into their spare bedroom turned work room/office and ran his fingers over Molly’s latest embroidery project just to feel the silky texture, then looked for whatever it was he was supposed to find. A grin split across his face as he found a puzzle, something he hadn’t had time to do in ages. It was the cover of _Der Katzenprinz,_ but a complicated one with many, many pieces. It looked like something he might have done with his parents on a rainy day.

Since he didn’t have anything else to do he opened it up and began to methodically sort out pieces into little piles while he hummed along to Molly’s music. Edge pieces over to one side, then a little pile of the color for the sky near the top, another for the grass, one for the trees, a pile of four for the elusive corner pieces, and then other piles for pieces that were part of different parts of the little boy and the cat. It was calm and slow, and eventually Molly joined him, singing along quietly and putting together the little boy and the cat while Caleb tried to match together the solid color of the sky.

It was busy enough work that he was completely devoid of any uncomfortable thoughts, and he eventually pulled away from the puzzle after it was almost halfway done as the dryer dinged. “You ready for a picnic? Or does the Zemnian in you want to finish it today?” Molly asked, stopping kissing the crown of his head before went to deal with the laundry.

“Ah, we could perhaps finish it tonight?” Caleb asked, leaning into Molly’s touch and feeling so relaxed he might have been able to fall asleep. “We could set up your laptop with a movie so you have something to watch while I work on the sky.”

Molly rubbed his shoulders for a moment before tipping up his chin. “Perfect," he said, punctuating his sentence with a quick kiss. “The picnic stuff is in the fridge if you want to get ready while I put away the towels.”

Caleb smiled up at him, even though he always found it ridiculous when Molly kissed him upside down. “Is the basket out?”

“On the counter,” Molly said, disappearing again and pulling out a huge pile of warm towels. Frumpkin was on the prowl, but Caleb called him away to rest on his shoulders. Not as enticing as fresh laundry, but still warm.

Caleb packed up the little bundles from the fridge into the basket, grabbing the blanket and folding it up so it would fit snugly under the handles as they walked.

Once Molly was back, they started their slow walk to the park. They were just going to the first park they went to when they were learning Infernal together, which wasn’t far from Caleb’s apartment. It had a little pond, and it was on enough of a hill that you could see the sun set over the Lucidian Ocean.

Molly walked them right to a big tree near the top of the park, setting up the blanket and pulling out the sandwiches and glasses of wine. Unwrapping his sandwich Caleb blinked. “Did you get these from the Zemnian deli down the street? When did you have time?”

“Ah, I got the guy there to give me the recipe,” Molly grinned. “Now I can make it for you whenever you want!”

Leaning into him and taking a bite, Caleb attempted not to moan. It was just like the deli, and it tasted like everything delicious his mother ever made. “You’re too good to me,” he mumbled, mouth full of sandwich and heart full of bliss. This was turning out to be an amazing day.

“You’re worth it.”

Caleb just rolled his eyes, letting Molly chat back and forth with him about how Veth barely wanted him to date Caleb before he knew how to bake fresh bread. He really had gotten good, ever since he saw how much Caleb loved it. And Caleb loved how much he smiled when he received praise about his cooking. They’d both gotten better, but Molly had flourished in their kitchen after the lessons he dragged them to. 

When they finished eating, Molly pulled Caleb to sit between his legs and lie back as Molly propped himself up against the tree. It was always comfortable to use Molly as a pillow, and Caleb thought he really might fall asleep now that he was full of delicious food and a little wine. 

But Molly’s fingers carding through his hair kept him conscious at least a bit, and the purring from Frumpkin that normally would have lulled him to sleep was absent since he’d gone to lie in a sun patch instead of the shade they’d found themselves in.

“Calianna and I found something we thought you’d like,” Molly said, taking the hand that wasn’t winding through Caleb’s hair and fishing out a hardcover book from inside the picnic basket. 

He wasn’t sure how Molly had snuck it in there, but he was good at that sort of thing. “Oh?”

“Mhmm,” Molly hummed, nuzzling closer so he could look over Caleb’s head. “Take a look.”

Everything fell into place like a perfectly crafted puzzle as Caleb looked at the Zemnian children’s book, illustrated and written by the same author as _Der Katzenprinz._

_Die Katzenhochzeit._

_The Cat Wedding._

Caleb could feel tears sting at his eyes at the sheer overwhelming wave of love and nostalgia. “I… I didn’t know this author wrote anything but _Der Katzenprinz,”_ he mumbled, wiping his eyes quickly with the back of his hand. 

“It’s a rare one, that’s for sure. Less popular than your little cat prince, so there were only ever two editions.” Molly brought his other arm around Caleb’s chest and held him tight. “Read it to me?”

He nodded quickly, opening the first page and running his hand lightly over the drawing of two cats in formal wear. Translating the words slowly, and taking his time to look at each new image, he got lost in the story, almost forgetting what was happening. What Molly had planned.

Caleb came to a new page of the book, heart full of nostalgia at the old illustrations that were so familiar yet so new. He couldn’t believe he’d never double checked to see if this author had written other books. The next book they read aloud at the bookstore would definitely be this one.

With all the mental focus it took to translate the Zemnian into Common for Molly, he hadn’t had time to register exactly what he was reading out loud until Molly read one of his lines for him.

“Will you marry me?”

Caleb nodded quickly, feeling choked up again as Molly turned the page and showed a ring hanging over the two cats embracing, swinging from a little length of ribbon stuck to the page with a little magnetic bookmark. It was a narrow gold band, understated and elegant. Fingers trembling just a bit, Caleb carefully undid the bow holding it in place to take it into his hands. At first glance it was plain and simple, but it was delicately engraved with a starburst upon closer inspection.

Molly nuzzled closer as he looked it over, reading the inscription inside the band over his shoulder. “My sun.”

“I may be biased,” Caleb said, trying to stop sounding so hoarse with emotion, “but I believe you won the competition. I will still try, but you’ve already done everything perfectly.”

The soft laugh in his ear filled his chest with warmth, and Caleb realized Molly was holding his necklace and sharing how much overwhelming joy and love he felt in the moment. Molly turned him around gently until he was sideways in his lap to kiss him, wrapping his hands around the one Caleb had holding the ring. He pulled back just a fraction, whispering over his lips as he held the ring, “May I?”

Caleb nodded, presenting his left hand and watching as Molly slipped the perfectly sized ring over his finger. His ring caught the golden light of the setting sun, looking even more spectacular than he could have imagined. He should just let Molly pick out everything he ever wore. “I love it. I love you. Today has been wonderful.”

“I love you more than the moon loves the sun,” Molly mumbled, nuzzling closer and sending his cheeks into a flush. “Do you want to finish the book? I didn’t read past the part I needed, so I don’t know the ending.”

“Of course, Liebling,” Caleb said, stealing another kiss before turning back around, which sent Molly to peppering kisses over his neck as he opened the book again. It was getting dark, so he finished reading with Molly looking over his shoulder, under the warm glow of his dancing lights as the sun set over the ocean, setting the sky ablaze in golds, pinks and oranges.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (posting this incredibly late at night because all my brain wanted to write today was angst, not fluff)


	112. The Moonweaver's Blessing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Caleb fulfills a few promises to himself

### Chapter 112: The Moonweaver’s Blessing

Molly was waiting for Caleb to propose, but at this point it had been a few months since his own proposal to Caleb and he didn’t seem to be in a rush. It’s not like he was impatient, exactly, just eager. He wanted to wear Caleb’s ring and start planning the wedding with people, not just quietly on his own.

That, and he wanted Caleb to wear his ring.

Not that Caleb had actually taken it off, but until their competition was over, he was wearing it on a chain under his shirt.

Molly never thought he’d be the possessive type, but seeing Caleb covered in hickeys or wearing jewelry he bought for him was satisfying in a way he didn’t fully understand. Caleb seemed to feel the same, blushing whenever Molly reminded him that he was Caleb’s, through and through. They were ridiculously in love, and had to deal with their friends rolling their eyes whenever they were in the room with the pda. He was ready to tell them they were getting married, but he would wait for Caleb to be ready too. Caleb was clearly planning something, though it was taking forever.

But he was hopeful for this weekend, since Caleb had asked him to take Folsen, Yulisen, and Da'leysen off. That was more than enough time to do something properly ostentatious, which apparently was what Caleb assumed Molly needed for his proposal.

Not that he was wrong, but Molly would have taken anything.

He would have been perfectly content with the silly discussion about taxes, honestly. However it was just in Caleb’s nature to be a perfectionist, and Molly wasn’t going to stop his wonderful wizard from doting on him, not this time.

So he was more than happy to slip into the small room in the inn in some random town in Tal’Dorei, once Caleb finally told him where they were going and let him pack before they teleported. Caleb had gotten strong enough to cast the tower and teleport in one day, so they were able to slip inside the tower and set their things down before having a night out on the town.

Caleb had enchanted the windows in the tower to show what the window of the inn showed, which was a stunning view of the snowy Cliffkeep Mountains and the quaint little village they’d found themselves in. It was beautiful, and Molly was growing surer and surer that Caleb was going to propose. It was too gorgeous here not to. 

But they just spent the rest of Folsen exploring the small town, stopping in cute little restaurants and cafés whenever they were hungry, and shopping in the new place. It was very fun, but Molly kept expecting to turn around and find Caleb on one knee.

Or just holding a ring.

Or magically suspended from the sky holding a ring of fire.

It wasn’t killing him at all that he had no idea what was happening, no sir.

“Ah, would you be willing to wear this tonight?” Caleb asked Yulisen evening in the tower, holding up the scarf of the night sky. They’d just gotten back from dinner after another day spent in town.

Molly’s eyes lit up. “I was wondering where that went! I wanted to see how the stars are different in Tal’Dorei but I couldn’t find it.”

Caleb flushed softly, “I wasn’t sure you’d bring it. I thought it would be nice to show you the different constellations as well.”

“It’s perfect. I got a dress that matches last week too,” Molly said, pulling out the dip dyed sundress that went from navy blue to a bright teal up top. The little cap sleeves and deep v neck showed off a decent chunk of his peacock and some of his favorite scars. He was going to wear it to dinner, but decided against it when he remembered he didn’t have the scarf.

Hooking their arms after Molly changed, Caleb led them back out of the tower and hotel.

“Where are we going?”

“That’s a secret,” Caleb hummed, staying close enough that Molly could steal his warmth. He was grateful that he threw leggings on under his skirt, and that Caleb had convinced him to throw on his fluffy white coat, even though it didn’t quite go. It didn’t snow in Nicodranas, but there was a dusting of frost this far north in Tal’Dorei.

Molly rolled his eyes. “You’re impossible.”

“You love it.”

“That I do, Mr. Caleb. That I do,” he grinned, kissing Caleb’s cheek as they walked.

The moons were full above them, and the further they walked from the small village, the night sky lit with stars above the Cliffkeep mountains. “Where we’re going is a bit further away, if you don’t mind traveling in a rather, well, unorthodox way.”

“So long as I’m with you,” Molly shrugged. He trusted Caleb.

Caleb smiled softly and squeezed his hand before stepping back and pulling out a familiar cocoon. Suddenly, Molly was standing in front of a tawny giant eagle, flecked with hints of copper, barely visible in the moonlight.

“Holy shit,” Molly murmured, forgetting always just how beautiful it was to watch Caleb do magic. He ran his fingers through the feathers on the chest, relishing in how lovely and soft they were.

The eagle Caleb turned and squatted down so Molly could hold on. He giggled as he wrapped his arms around Caleb’s neck, giddy with excitement as the massive wings stretched out beside them and they took to the air. Caleb made a screeching sound that reverberated through his body as they cut through the air like lightning, above the trees and soaring towards the light of the two full moons.

As soon as they got far enough away from the light of the village, eagle Caleb shrieked again, turning a bit to the side to encourage Molly to look up.

His breath caught in his throat as he looked up at the sky and saw the Northern Lights dancing above the mountain tops. It was gorgeous, and he looked down to see his scarf all lit up in teals and purples. They were so high up Molly felt like they were a part of the sky.

If it was with anyone else, he might have been scared, but he knew Caleb would never let him fall.

A euphoric laugh bubbled from his chest and he felt the eagle Caleb do something similar before flapping his wings and soaring up even higher. Molly grinned, feeling the wind rush over his face and risking lifting a hand up to feel it cut through the air. It looked like he was actually touching the beautiful colors in the sky, and he almost expected to see them ripple.

All too soon, Caleb brought them to a small clearing on the top of one of the mountains, landing and reverting back to his human form. He moved to take off his backpack but Molly stopped him halfway there with a hug, unable to stop grinning. “We have to do that again. And again. Maybe a million times.”

“I’m glad you enjoyed it,” Caleb said, wearing a matching grin as he gave up on his bag and kissed Molly’s nose in the way he only did when he was completely happy. “I love flying too. Maybe I can make you the eagle on the way down.”

“I could _fly?”_ Molly asked, tail whipping back and forth in excitement.

Caleb chuckled and pulled away to avoid getting smacked by the tail. “If you’d like, Liebling.”

“Hell yeah, I’d like,” Molly mumbled, still managing to smack Caleb’s ass with his excited tail as Caleb grabbed his spellbook and began to cast a few spells. First he moved all the snow away from the clearing, revealing a small outcropping of flat stones. Then he took a few minutes to cast the dome, allowing them to stop freezing their toes off. They pulled a picnic blanket out of his backpack together and laid it out. He shivered only once from the residual cold before Caleb pulled out another soft blanket and draped it over both their shoulders, then had them lean back on the backpack as a pillow.

Molly shifted until he had an arm under Caleb’s neck so he could pull him to rest on his shoulder. It was warm and snuggly, and he couldn’t stop his tail from fluttering in excitement. The dome was transparent above them, warm while they looked at the beautiful lights.

“Have you figured out why I brought you out here?” Caleb asked, his voice so quiet it was almost a whisper in the quiet forest clearing.

Humming softly and not wanting to jump the gun, Molly said, “The lights? They’re really beautiful.”

“That was a part of it, for sure,” Caleb said, snaking his arm around to link their hands. “This is the most beautiful place to see the largest full moons of the decade.”

Molly smiled as he looked up at Catha and Ruidus, full and bright above them. “So they’re not just big since we’re closer to them?”

He laughed at the dumb joke, shaking his head. “I never really prayed much, even as a child. Worship of the Moonweaver and many other gods was forbidden in the Empire, and it never seemed like I lived a very blessed life.”

Molly held him a little tighter, frowning at the idea. But Caleb went on, “And then I met all the Mighty Nein. I saw the miracles from Jester and Caduceus, and then Fjord. And I learned that you prayed to the Moonweaver. I researched her, when we first met, since I never knew about her in the Empire.”

“You did?” Molly blinked, looking down as Caleb looked up at him, blue eyes reflecting all the brightness of the moon.

Caleb nodded, and raised his hand to cup and run his thumb across Molly’s cheek. “The patron deity of moonlight, autumn, and lover’s trysts. I could see why she appealed to you.”

“The night before we got you away from Ikithon, the moons were full. I prayed to her, for you. I asked her to protect you, since you were my lover and all,” Molly whispered, tears threatening even at the memory. “I don’t know if I owe you being safe to her, but I still thank her every day for it.”

Smiling softly, Caleb nodded, “Sehanine is the only goddess I have ever seen called by my own magic. I did not understand it, but when I cast the spell to give you your own body, she was there. In part, we owe what we have to her.”

Molly let out a small laugh instead of the happy sob that was threatening to take over. “I… I guess she really does take care of her lovers.”

“We’re here,” Caleb paused to kiss Molly’s nose before directing them to both look back up at the sky, “to see the Moonweaver’s Ribbons, on her holy day, which happens to coincide with the Winter Solstice.”

A small, genuine gasp left Molly’s lips as he saw the wyvern riders appear above them, taking hold of the green and purple ribbons of light like he’d imagined doing himself and beginning their intricate, swirling dance.

For what felt like hours, he watched, enraptured by the dancing ribbons, twirling into figures and patterns that told little stories of famous battles, prayers for good harvests, lovers blessed by the gods, and other things Molly couldn’t recognize but still adored. Caleb watched alongside him, chatting quietly and telling the stories of the images whenever Molly couldn’t tell what was happening. The man knew more myths than a classics professor.

As the last rider disappeared over the horizon, Molly felt something cold pressed into his hand. He looked down and realized Caleb was slipping a ring into his grasp. Caleb cleared his throat, a light flush on his cheeks as he met his eyes with deep love and passion in his own. “Would you do me the honor, under the light of the Moonweaver, of making this tryst official?”

Molly’s face split open into a wide grin, feeling his words escape him as he began to nod even as Caleb kept going, “Will you marry me?”

“Of course,” he said, wishing it didn’t sound quite as choked as it did. “How could I ever say no, you perfect, lovely thing,” he mumbled, surging forward to wrap Caleb tightly in his arms.

Caleb laughed in his embrace, nuzzling into his neck. “It would be quite awkward if you said no now, ja.”

Molly snorted, pulling back to look at the ring in his hand, tail flicking in excitement again. “Oh, Caleb, it’s beautiful.”

“Can you see it okay in the dark? It looks much better to me in the light, but I don’t have your eyes,” Caleb mumbled, squinting at it.

Shaking his head, Molly slipped it on, “It’s perfect. The moons are bright.”

It was a big rectangular emerald, flanked by two gems that held images of Ruidus and Catha, currently surrounded by the beautiful ribbons of light. The band was silver and etched with an art nouveau style pattern, tapering to a thin point so he could still bend his finger. Engraved on the inside was a message matching the one on Caleb’s ring.

_My moon._

Caleb was taking his ring off the chain on his neck and slipping it on his own finger. He was explaining the enchantment on the ring, how it was like Molly's scarf and would always show the moon phases, and the sky above them, which was why it showed the lights now.

Molly practically tackled him, lacing their hands together and pinning them up over Caleb’s head as he straddled him and pinned them both to the blanket. He couldn’t stop grinning at the feeling of the two metal bands that meant forever clinking together in their linked hands. “No one can see through the dome, right?” he asked, a wicked glint in his eye at the flustered look on his fiancé’s face.

“Ah, nein, it is an opaque rocky color from the outside, and no one can enter but us-”

Molly nipped at Caleb’s earlobe to cut off the magical ramblings with a beautiful yelp. “Perfect. Let’s make this a tryst to remember.”


	113. I Do

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A sneak peek into how much I adore weddings, and some tooth rotting fluff for the second to last chapter of this monstrous fic!!!

### Chapter 113: I Do

Mollymauk’s wedding pinterest board thing turned out to be a bigger undertaking than Caleb anticipated. Soon there were thousands of little images and ideas that Caleb had said he could technically make out of magic. Many of the pictures would have been quite simple to replicate in the tower or with his fabricate spell, or asking Reani favors for creating some of the flowers. 

He didn’t assume that he would be volunteered to do, not all, but most of what he offered to do. When he asked Molly if he wanted to get married, he assumed Molly would want to do much of the planning. Caleb was a busy person, and they both knew that.

What he didn’t expect was how fun it was to plan right alongside Molly and Jester. 

How much he genuinely enjoyed all the combined ideas to modify the tower into a beautiful reception space.

How excited he was to finally be allowed to see Mollymauk’s dress, currently in production in their work room and locked away in a closet that he wasn’t allowed to look in. And though withheld knowledge was one of his biggest weaknesses, he knew Molly didn’t want him to see it yet. And so he didn’t look.

He really didn’t expect to care about the colors of flowers, but he really did prefer the orange lilies to the white.

And there was something incredibly fun about planning a massive party for all of their friends. Caleb really wasn’t inviting many people beyond the Mighty Nein, but Molly had invited quite a few friends from the _Lavish Chateau_ and the _Emporium._ Of course it was nothing the tower couldn’t handle, and at this point, if Molly trusted them, Caleb would too.

Anyone who was excited to see them promise to love each other forever was more than welcome to celebrate, as far as he was concerned. 

So he went with Molly on their days off together to fabricate long benches made out of driftwood, and an arch for them to stand over. He watched as Reani wound flowers around them and commented on changing the colors in places, even though Molly mostly wanted to inject as much color as possible into every location he could see. Every time Yasha saw an exotic flower, Molly would send him a picture and ask to make sure it would be in the tower. Even with his memory, he was starting to worry about keeping track of it all, but he’d started a small binder of printed images he could look at the morning before he cast it.

Every night for the past few months he’d been given a new jar that Molly had either eaten the pickles out of and painted the lid gold, or bought at the craft store. Molly’s pleading look was enough for him to roll his eyes and spend a few hours enchanting it so that it could contain his dancing lights, a few small orange orbs dancing inside like fireflies. It took even longer to enchant them all to float like Molly wanted, but he knew it would look beautiful, and he couldn’t say no. That, and they decided they could give them away as little favors, and make sure everyone who couldn’t magically produce light would have a little floating nightlight if they ever needed.

Spending time focusing on complicated magic would help his inevitable nerves as well.

The thought of getting up in front of all the people and having to say something was a bit nerve wracking, so he just threw himself into the planning. He couldn’t worry about his vows when he was redesigning the tower into a massive dance hall and working in a way to make sure all the sand would stay outside, where it belonged.

Or when he was focused on getting the measurements for Frumpkin's little suit. As soon as he saw pictures of animals as ring bearers online, he knew that Frumpkin had to be in the wedding. And when he asked Molly, he only grinned and asked about a matching suit. He assured Caleb that he had enough leftover fabric after tailoring his suit to make a little suit jacket for him. Frumpkin was less enthused about this idea, but reluctantly agreed after being bribed with the promise of many treats.

So the days went by quickly, full of planning and enchanting and brunches and movie nights with the Mighty Nein. Movie nights that each slowly devolved into Jester sitting in between Molly and Caleb on the couch, bringing up the now shared pinterest board and asking for ideas about their cake, which would be the present of Jester and Veth, and seemed to have more food coloring in it than actual cake. She and Veth were also very eager to discuss decorations and outfits, though Caleb wasn’t allowed to even hear them talk about Molly’s dress. At least he assumed it was a dress.

The curiosity was only killing him a little.

But Veth was living vicariously through Caleb in terms of wedding planning since she and Yeza got married quite quickly a long time ago. He promised he’d help her make a vow renewal ceremony together with her and Yeza after his own wedding, but she was still taking her self-appointed role of mothering Caleb through the process very seriously. 

And all too soon, Veth was worrying at his tie in their prep room in the redesigned tower, asking the time for the thirtieth time in the last hour.

“We have ten minutes, Schatz,” he said softly, rather pleased that he could focus on her anxiety instead of his own. It was familiar, and grounding in a way he hadn’t expected. He was good at worrying about other people.

She brushed his hair back, sticking the strands that refused to stay in the crown of braids around his head. “I know, I know, plenty of time.”

“You could sit down for a moment,” he suggested, knowing it was in vain.

Veth just shook her head and went to stand in front of the mirror for a moment, fidgeting with her own dress. It was a bright yellow color, and Jester had been by earlier to weave sunflowers through her braid, and white roses in his own hair. She shook her head, almost shaking a flower loose. “Too much nervous energy. I don’t know how you’re not nervous. You’re always nervous.”

“I hide it better than you,” he smiled, tucking the flower in deeper so it would stay.

She smiled up at him. “I’m so happy for you, Caleb.”

“You’re not allowed to make me cry yet, remember,” he mumbled, looking up and trying not to get lost in the sheer amount of overwhelming emotions the day held.

She shook her head and hugged him, “Still. You know it’s true.”

“I know,” he said, hugging her back carefully, so as not to rumple her dress too much.

“Okay, I think it’s about time,” she said, pulling back and dabbing lightly at her eyes to try and preserve her makeup. “Molly wanted me to give this to you.” Veth pulled a small box out of her bag.

Caleb ran his fingers over it, frowning gently. “Is this a tradition I don’t know about?”

“Just him being sweet. Open it.”

It was a beautiful boutonniere made of white rose buds. Caleb smiled softly down at it, running a finger over one of the petals. “It’s lovely.”

“He had Reani take him to Blumenthal yesterday. They’re your mother’s.”

He really did cry then, but Veth was ready with the tissue box this time. She rubbed his back and helped him pin it to his lapel. “I was skeptical about him in the beginning, but I think he might actually be worth you now,” she said quietly, kissing his forehead while he was still kneeling.

“Glad you approve,” he mumbled, still a bit lost in trying not to make his eyes red and puffy right before a bunch of pictures would be taken. 

Veth just chuckled and pulled back, looking him over. “You’re perfect. C’mon. It’s starting soon.”

Jester pounded on the door just as she said so, telling them to get downstairs.

He walked down the aisle with Veth in hand, smiling softly at all their friends waving to him. They’d chosen not to have a big procession, opting instead for a short ceremony and a bigger reception. No one they knew really liked to sit still.

Caduceus’s broad smile at the altar was welcoming as he clasped Caleb’s shoulder and whispered a soft congratulations. He nodded and turned back towards the tower, pleased that the music he sent drifting out was audible all the way up here. It was in perfect time too, a light classical Zemnian piece.

Caleb’s breath caught in his throat as Molly and Yasha slipped out the door to the tower.

The dress was very literally breathtaking, and he could hear Veth’s voice in his mind as a flash of copper illuminated beside him. “Remember to breathe, Caleb, you look like you’re going to pass out! Don’t-respond-to-this-message-you’re-busy-getting-married-I-love-you.” That snapped him out of it enough to laugh just a bit, reminding himself in fact to breathe as he watched Molly grinning at him from the end of the aisle.

He must have dyed the skirt like he dyed the dress he wore when they got engaged officially in Tal’Dorei. But instead of teal dyed blue on bottom, the white dress flared out at the hips and turned first yellow, then orange, red, and lastly deep purple. It looked like the setting sun behind him, but somehow even more beautiful. The fabric wrapped around the arch behind Caleb, the floral arrangements Yasha had placed at the end of each bench, and even Caleb’s tie matched the bloom of color. Molly had thought everything out perfectly, and somehow literally outshone the sun in the sky. The dress stopped right at his mid-calf, showing off bare feet and the little jeweled adornments on his feet that matched the ones on his ears and horns.

Caleb felt a bit underdressed, even though he was in a suit. The pale gray jacket wasn’t too hot in the sun, and he kept his feet barefoot as well, cuffs rolled up away from the sand. He thought it looked a bit silly, but the sensation of sand moving through his toes was grounding amid the sudden surge of adrenaline in his veins.

This was really happening.

Molly had really chosen _him, forever._

He could hardly believe it.

Molly met him at the altar, turning his beautiful grin on him with full force. “Hey there.”

Caleb smiled back and ran his hand along his lapel, showing off the white roses there. “Hallo. Thank you.”

“They’re with you,” Molly murmured, falling quiet as he brushed a tear away from Caleb’s lashes and the crowd behind them was seated with a few words from Caduceus.

Caduceus was saying lovely things, but Caleb was incredibly distracted. Molly was stunning, and he really did have to remind himself to keep breathing steadily through his racing brain and adrenaline. Soon it was time for his vows, and he almost wished he had written them down, even though he could have memorized something much longer.

Clearing his throat, he met Molly’s eyes and felt the warmth of the encouraging expression on his face. He took a deep breath and began, “When I met you, Mollymauk, I thought you were far too beautiful to ever look at someone like me. I didn’t think I could have a future like this because I didn’t think I had a future. You helped me find beauty in everything, you helped me find my future, and I realized I didn’t want any part of the future if it didn’t have you.”

Caleb took a deep breath. “You’re the most ostentatious, loud, colorful, lovely, gorgeous part of my life, and I’m excited to share the future together. I vow to stay by your side through it all, and love you in this life and the next.”

There were tears glistening in the corners of Molly’s eyes, threatening the beautiful stripes of gold over his eyelids. “Caleb. Somehow, even though you’re one of the most awkward people in any room, you’re this amazing wordsmith. I begged Caddy to let me go first, so I wouldn’t have to follow you, but I’m sure you asked him the same. Guess we know who he likes better,” Molly said, winking up at the firbolg good naturedly as the crowd chuckled. “I never expected you to be so good with words, when we first met, but I saw your smile. It was brighter than the sun.”

Molly looked up from the card in his hand, tucking it back into some unseen pocket in his flowing skirt. “I knew I would do anything to see that smile again, and I did. And then I did it again. And again. And I fell in love with your smile before I fell in love with you, but now that I know how wonderful you are underneath it, I’ll never stop. I vow to do everything I can to keep you smiling, as long as I’m able. And when you can’t smile, I’ll be there to love you through those bad parts too. I’ll be there. Always.”

Caleb just stared, feeling himself start to smile a bit more just at the admission. Molly had said similarly before, but it still struck him that such a beautiful person could feel that way about him.

Caduceus gave them a moment before asking, “So, Caleb, do you take Mollymauk Tealeaf to be your lawfully wedded spouse?”

“I do,” he said, without any hesitation.

“And do you, Mollymauk, take Caleb Widogast to be your lawfully wedded husband?”

“I do,” Molly said, grin splitting across his face so wide it looked like it hurt. Caleb was helpless but to smile back. For all Molly said, Caleb felt that Molly was really the one who looked brighter than the sun.

“Then by the power vested in me by the Wildmother, and a courthouse I had to visit in Nicodranas’ City Hall, I pronounce you two married.” Caduceus smiled benignly down at them. “Go on, you’re supposed to kiss now, I think.”

Molly rolled his eyes and surged forward, wrapping his arms around Caleb’s neck and only lightly smacking him with the bouquet before remembering to pass it backwards to Yasha. Once that was out of the way, Caleb dipped him, just to show off the flare of the beautiful skirt. Their friends cheered behind him, and he never wanted to let go.


	114. Und wenn sie nicht gestorben sind, dann leben sie noch heute

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the long awaited end! thank you to anyone who has taken this ridiculous journey with me!!

### Chapter 114: Und wenn sie nicht gestorben sind, dann leben sie noch heute

Molly’s cheeks hurt.

He wasn’t sure he’d smiled so much in his life.

The smile he fell in love with all those years ago was present and on display, and aimed at him. And because of him. Because Caleb had asked for something he wanted again, and it was Molly. Again.

People cheered behind them as Caleb had dipped him at the altar, and he’d scooped Caleb up into his arms to take him across the threshold into the tower. Caleb, his _husband,_ had managed to put on a little more muscle recently, but Molly had kept up his promise and had been training with Beau and Yasha to make sure he could still lift him. And do that cool stunning thing Beau did. He hadn’t actually gotten the chance to try it on someone other than hitting Caleb’s pressure point lightly enough to daze him. It was very effective for confusing him enough to pick him up and carry him to bed late at night.

It was too cute to see him blushing and worrying after Molly’s dress anyways. He’d train until he was as big around as Yasha if it meant he could keep carrying Caleb.

They set up at their table near the back of the grand hall Caleb had constructed in the tower, collapsing into their chairs and still grinning like mad. It was time to deal with the onslaught of hugs and congratulations, something Molly had already decided he’d be taking the brunt of, since Caleb was sure to be halfway exhausted at this point. 

But Caleb, genius that he was, had distracted people with his spectral cats taking drink orders and walking around with trays of hors d'oeuvres balanced on their tails somehow, sending all the folks Molly knew from work into a tizzy over how cute they were. And they _were,_ all in little matching suits to Frumpkin, who had found his way into Caleb’s lap and hadn’t left. The little suit jacket Molly had made him would probably keep Molly on his shit list for a few months, but it was worth it to see how Caleb cooed and called him a handsome little kitten.

He must have been smiling like a dope, because Caleb looked up at him and flushed softly. “What? Is there something on my face?”

“Nope. Just watching you being cute,” Molly said, propped up on his wrists and staring. He was in love and legally obligated to share it with the world. At least, that’s how he assumed marriage worked.

“Stop being cute for a minute and tell me about this competition again. And how you both hid that you were engaged from us for _months,”_ Beau said, sending a scalding look at Molly that had nothing behind it but familial affection. He’d been told that technically now he was a brother in law, even though he maintained he should have been already, since Yasha was basically his sister. She was still faster than him though, and he couldn’t duck that punch.

Caduceus just said, “Oh, I knew. Caleb started wearing a new necklace with a ring on it.”

“We were actually engaged a few months before that too, Cad,” Molly grinned, always pleased to have snuck something past the firbolg.

He raised a brow, as if connecting the dots about some unnatural spike in their happiness back last summer. But Beau just rolled her eyes and went on, “C’mon, Tealeaf, just spit it out.”

“Excuse you, that’s Tealeaf-Widogast,” he grinned, extremely pleased with the addition to his long chosen name. Beau flipped him off as Caleb started explaining their competition.

Caleb carefully told the story of how Molly had proposed, his hand wrapped around Molly’s under the table and the other hand worrying at the necklace to fill him with such warmth and devotion he might have teared up alongside him. Molly told the story of Caleb’s proposal next, adding the perfect amount of flourish, and not too much detail at all, even as Caleb descended into a dark flush at the more suggestive descriptions of their “tryst.”

“Anyways, we told Jester, Veth, and Caduceus the stories and had them pick a winner,” Molly finished up, not unaware that Beau didn’t actually care that much how fun it was to fly around as a giant eagle.

Caduceus smiled his easy grin, “It was very hard to pick. Caleb thought Molly won, and Molly thought Caleb won. And they were kind of perfect for each other.”

Jester nodded seriously at Beau, “We basically said it was a tie, until Veth remembered something.”

“Caleb was already planning on bringing Molly to the Moonweaver’s Ribbons, way before he wanted to propose. Molly came up with the whole proposal just for their engagement. It wasn’t much, but it tipped the scales,” Veth said, shrugging. She was still of the opinion that, objectively, Caleb’s was better, but Molly wasn’t expecting anything less from her. 

“So,” Molly grinned, “we’re going to the Bay of Gifts for our honeymoon.”

Caleb laughed softly, leaning into Molly’s shoulder. “As if I had some significant preference where we went.”

“True, true. With my luck I would have been trying to sunbathe in a library,” Molly teased, kissing Caleb’s temple as the man didn’t even bother to pout. There was no time for that. Only happiness. 

“So long as I’m with you, we could go to Eiselcross for all I care,” Caleb said, rolling his eyes and snaking an arm around Molly’s waist. He nuzzled closer, avoiding his horns as they shared this content moment, knowing that everyone was here to celebrate how much they adored each other. People were mingling and their happiness was catching. 

Molly couldn’t find a frown in sight as he wrapped an arm around Caleb’s shoulders and kissed the crown of his head. “All the same, I’d much rather be somewhere remote and tropical.”

Sighing with a little nod, Caleb grabbed a small plate from a passing cat, “Danke, Fritz.” The spectral cat gave a soft mew before disappearing, another one walking by with a refill for Molly’s drink.

He accepted gratefully, stealing little mini quiches off Caleb’s plate. Molly had eaten a few before realizing they were the ones Caleb said he didn’t like when they were trying things out, and that he’d just grabbed them for Molly. His heart melted all over again and he squeezed Caleb’s shoulder.

“But in all seriousness, congratulations, you two. You look very happy together,” Caduceus said, clapping Caleb on the shoulder.

Veth nodded, “Sickeningly happy, honestly.” Beau grunted her agreement beside the Brenatto family, but was quickly elbowed by Yasha.

“Aww, I think they’re cute!” Jester cooed, grinning at the pair, clearly lost in their own love. Molly wasn’t sure he’d ever come down from this high. He knew it was inevitable, but he thought he could get a good year out of it at this rate.

Fjord smiled in a way only someone smitten with Jester could, as Beau snorted, “You think every couple in the world is cute.”

“Well, a lot of them are! Especially us! We’re all happy and satisfied and a lot of us are in love. It’s sweet,” she pouted, accepting Fjord’s assurances that they all were, indeed, very sweet. 

Molly mumbled under his breath, “And they all lived happily ever after.”

“Und wenn sie nicht gestorben sind, dann leben sie noch heute,” Caleb said as he rested on his shoulder, looking like he might fall asleep there. Molly was, admittedly, very comfortable.

Molly said, “You know I’ve been practicing my Zemnian, but that all went over my head, dear.”

“And if they haven’t died, they are still alive today. It’s how Zemnian fairy tales end.”

Unable to keep himself from laughing, Molly said, “What? Really?”

“Mhmm,” Caleb hummed, still content on his shoulder, even as Molly teased his native tongue. “It is morbid, but so are we.”

“I suppose so,” Molly mused, rolling his eyes and kissing Caleb’s temple again. It was too close, too tempting to stop.

“Is cocktail hour actually supposed to be an hour?” he asked suddenly from his spot under Molly’s chin.

Molly couldn’t help but to laugh again, “Honestly, I have no idea. Were you counting?”

“Maybe.” Caleb pressed a sneaky kiss to Molly’s collarbone before righting himself. “I know you were excited to dance.”

Lighting up, Molly nodded quickly, standing alongside Caleb, his _husband,_ and taking his hand to lead them out to the dance floor. Chuckling and following after, Caleb was speaking Zemnian to some cats, who were inexplicably forming a string quartet. There was no way that should be possible, even with magic cats, but Caleb had somehow taught them all how to play stringed instruments over the past few months.

Since it meant they didn’t need to hire a band, Molly hadn’t questioned it, but he did laugh at the ridiculous sight. Patiently, Caleb waited for him to stop laughing before they started their waltz. Ages ago, Caleb's father had taught him how to waltz in that little house in Blumenthal. With his mother's flowers on his lapel and his father's music in his step, Caleb looked like he might cry. Molly held him a little closer, a knowing look in his eye.

"Pssst," he whispered on a spin, catching Caleb's attention.

He raised a brow in question, taking a moment to dip him with a flourish so his skirt billowed out in all it's colorful glory.

Molly grinned, "Guess what?"

Caleb rolled his eyes, “What?” His whisper was quiet over the music, accent thick.

“I love you,” Molly said softly, watching his expression melt as he dipped him again, this time stealing a kiss just as the photographer’s camera flashed.

“Love you too,” Caleb said, pulling him back up and continuing their dance.

A moment of panic flashed through him, “Wait, the pictures we take in the tower won’t disappear, will they?”

“Liebling,” Caleb laughed, unable to hold it back even as they were finishing up the first dance.

He frowned, lost in his momentary worry, “What?”

“What’s your phone screen right now?”

Molly blinked, “It’s you and me in the Salon, and I’m giving you bunny ears while you busy reading-”

“And it stays, just like it should. If we had created the camera it might be an issue, but I’d find a way to fix it. Don’t worry about a thing, Liebling.” Caleb started a different tempo as the second song began, other members of the Mighty Nein beginning to take their partners out on the dance floor.

His shoulders fell in relief as they started the slower song. “Right, right. Should have known.”

“It’s okay. I want today to be perfect too,” Caleb murmured, holding him closer as their steps slowed and they just basked in each other’s presence. It would be like this, forever. It was more than Molly had ever hoped to dream of.

He swirled and oscillated slowly with Caleb as Jester and Fjord, Beau and Yasha, Veth and Yeza, and Caduceus with Luc dancing on his shoes, joined them on the floor. After a few songs, Luc found Kiri and the Schusters, dancing in a little group while Caduceus found the rest of the Clays. Calliope and Colton were swirling elegantly while Caduceus and Clarabelle looked like the most awkward beings Molly had ever seen.

It was lovely, and he hoped the photographer made sure to capture the moment. The woman Reani had recommended was flitting around the room expertly, taking shots in places Molly wouldn’t even have thought of. He was excited to see all of them, but that could wait.

“Are you excited for the honeymoon?” he asked Caleb, still dancing too close even though the song’s had picked up speed again.

“Of course, Liebling,” he said, hands tracing small shapes on Molly’s hips. “Two weeks anywhere with you sounds like bliss.”

Feeling his smile creep up again, Molly nuzzled his nose into Caleb’s hair, careful of the flowers. “If you do get bored of Dalen’s Closet, we can always teleport somewhere with access to a library.”

“Veth has filled my bag of holding and given me a list of thirty new books she found. I think I’ll be alright for two weeks.” Caleb gave his hips a light squeeze as they turned again. “Like I said, I would be happy anywhere, so long as it was with you.”

Molly was suddenly filled with the image of Caleb reading along pristine beaches, quieter and emptier than Nicodranas, remote enough for them both to fully relax and soak up the sun. Or for Molly to soak up the sun and repeatedly slather his pale wizard in as much enchanted sunscreen as he could find. Jester had made him a special umbrella that matched his gold Klimt’s _The Kiss_ swim trunks, and he already had a lovely beach towel covered in constellations. Hopefully he could manage to keep Caleb from burning too badly.

He was lost for words at the amount of love he held in his heart so he just fumbled for his moon necklace, sending the powerful emotion in a crashing wave of warmth that Caleb only echoed. Caleb leaned their foreheads together, smiling with not a single line of worry on his face.

Before he could tear up and threaten his makeup, Molly cleared his throat, “Think we should serve the cake yet? I think most people ate dinner without us.”

Caleb shrugged, “I don’t see why not. We can eat something more substantial afterwards, or just have cake for dinner.”

“You’re a genius. I knew I married you for a reason,” Molly teased, leaning closer to give Caleb a quick peck before pulling him back to the table of the Nein.

The photographer managed to get a few pictures of him and Caleb covered in cake before Caleb begged Pumat to clean them up. Molly pouted, “Oh, you’re no fun.”

“But your dress,” Caleb mumbled, running his hand over Molly’s side, taking in the texture. Molly had picked it out for the bodice since he knew Caleb loved the satiny feeling, but the look on his face as he worried about Molly’s creation was completely precious.

So Molly couldn’t just _not_ kiss him, even though everyone was still watching after they cut the cake, cheering and whooping for them again. Caleb flushed his beautiful pink and they spent the rest of the evening eating a ridiculous amount of cake and whatever Molly could think to ask the cats for.

Slowly, slowly, the party slowed down until it was just the Mighty Nein and a few friends who promised to help pack up the things they’d left out on the beach. Caleb was allowed to open up his demiplane, but the newlyweds had been banned from actually helping clean up. Before long, they were saying goodbyes, Veth and Jester tearing up as they sent them off, even though it was just for two weeks.

“Promise you’ll text me, Caleb,” Veth insisted, straightening his tie for the fiftieth time at least that night.

Jester nodded, “Text all of us! And send lots of pictures!”

“Of course, of course. You won’t get us to shut up about how much fun we’re having without you all,” Molly teased, kissing Jester’s cheek and hugging Yasha before moving back over to Caleb. Beau punched his shoulder again, and he was glad it was the tattooed one since it would cover the bruise. “Bye, assholes!”

“We will text when we’re safely in the hotel, so no one worries,” Caleb said, before he took Molly’s hand and squeezed it.

“On to the next adventure,” Molly looked at him and grinned, the ache in his cheeks seeming like just a fact of life now. Maybe he’d grow used to it, being this happy all the time. It still felt like it might take a while to sink in. “Ready to start forever together?” he asked, shifting their bag of holding up onto his shoulder.

Looking back over him, Caleb paused just a moment in the familiar incantation of the teleportation spell, the little statue from the Bay of Gifts in hand to act as his focus. The magic swelled around them as they landed on a different beach, the sun here still shining bright in the sky, as alive and bright as Molly felt.

Caleb pulled him close, sunbaked sand under foot as he kissed him gently. “Ready.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you again to everyone who commented on this fic while I was writing it; it genuinely was the brightest spot of my day sometimes during my quarantine. If you've been through the whole thing, please leave me a comment just to know what you thought; hearing from you all is so lovely.
> 
> I'll probably be taking a week off to finish editing the old chapters (I'm up to 75!), and setting up new fics (definitely doing the shadowgast pacrim au, and the widogast human college au, and probably like three or four others because I'm insane and very prolific rn), but I'll be back!! In the meantime, feel free to come scream about this week's episode with me on tumblr @calebneedsahug 
> 
> I love you all, deeply, endlessly 💕 💕 💕


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